uncle-iso-blog

[uncle-iso-blog]

Another

Another night alone watching Family Guy.

Another night cowered in jealously

of those around me who frolic

to the bars every night

Another drink down

Another hour wasted

Another episode watched

Another day spent up and down

Another thought enters my mind and

I can’t decide if I want it to pass

or not, but I dwell on it still

thinking that if I think

about it long enough

maybe I’ll finally be able to

say to myself that it’s ok to take time

for yourself because not every hour

of the day needs to be spent

working, but it doesn’t matter because

it’s just going to be another.

Another day working.

On my only day off.

[uncle-iso-blog]

Don’t

Don’t waste my time

ticking away,

plucking at my nerves

With barbed wire attached to your fingers.

Don’t lie to my face

With empty vases

Of promising roses.

I don’t want the mirages.

Don’t lay in my arms

With the intent to stab me

In my pulsating heart

Throbbing with nothing but love for you

Don’t tell me you love me

With smiling frowns

And arms wrapped around me

Tightly pushing the breath out of my lungs

Don’t come around this way anymore.

Your presence isn’t welcome.

You can’t make a home in my heart.

We won’t let you.

[uncle-iso-blog]

300.

Little Victories.

Sometimes, they’re all you need

Just to make it through the day

Because if they didn’t exist

The only emotion you would feel is

Fuck it.

Sometimes,

They’re all you have

Because the battles you’ve fought,

won and lost

Are not even close to completing the war.

Sometimes,

I wish I was Leonidas

Commanding the most epic army in all of history.

Er, at least that’s how Frank Miller made it seem...

Sometimes,

I feel like Leonidas,

Leading my army into impending doom

Knowing damn well

We are not equipped enough to take on what looms before us.

Sometimes,

I wish I was just a soldier

Following orders

Doing what needs to be done

And believing that that’ll be enough

But unfortunately,

I will never be a soldier.

I could never be a soldier.

I could never lose my autonomy.

I could never be a follower.

I could never do without knowing why.

So fortunately,

I have been born with the natural inclination

To Never Quit.

To face adversity with a “fuck you” attitude.

To remember that the battle is short

And to remind myself that the war is temporary.

[uncle-iso-blog]

Miller Mac

Actually, I was just waking up from a much needed and glorious nap when out in the living room my friend said, “Mac Miller just died.”

I was up then.

Confused and thinking to myself, “nah, that’s not what he just said.”

But then he said it again.

And then I was down.

I reached for my phone and instantly checked my timeline and all I saw was “RIP, RIP, RIP” his face plastered in every post.

I couldn’t believe it.

No way in heaven or hell did I see it coming.

I don’t think any of us did...

_________

Mac was a friend that I hadn’t met yet.

Mac inspired me in so many ways that I didn’t even realize.

All of my best songs and beats had been inspired by him. I feel like I owed him a beer or something.

I feel like the world just lost a beacon of hope. Like the world is telling us there is no more room for good souls anymore, so it had to take one of the best away.

... he said

“To everyone who sell me drugs

Don’t mix it with that bullshit, I’m hoping not to join the 27 Club

(song: Brand Name)

He was 26.

Dammit he was only 26.

He didn’t even make it...

_______

Now all I can wonder is what could we have done?

I see these artists toppling over and suffering from addiction all the time.

He told us song after song, album after album that shit was bad.

That he wasn’t ok.

That he had a drug problem.

But that was the thing!

He knew he had a problem, and he had been working to try to stop it.

Acknowledgement is step 1, step 2 is planning to cure it, and step 3 is execution.

But that’s execution of the plan, not execution of yourself...

See, these drugs...

For so many, they see them as an escape.

Little do they know, its really the thing that traps them.

The more you run into the arms of a xanny, or a perc, or a vallium, or whatever, the more you run, the farther and farther sanctity of mind becomes, because you’re running towards an illusion of the other side, carried like a carrot on a stick, headed the opposite way.

It’s a vicious cycle.

But what could we have done?

Anything?

I don’t know,

But the reason I feel so hurt is because he didn’t deserve to die and I feel like we could have done something...

Rest in Paradise Mac,

It’ll be a while, but I hope you got some beats waiting for me in heaven.

Here’s just a couple of my favorite songs by the kid...