vampireautism

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a minotaur is 60 secontaurs

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MINECRAFT ENDERMAN - MINECRAFT

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I do not "tweet", I do not "snap", I do not "make a tiktok", I BLOG ON TUMBLR DOT COM, and if I have no wifi, I USE MY NOTES APP

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Amaury "Chocolate Guy" Guichon is undoubtedly an extremely skilled sculptor in chocolate but I think my favorite thing about a lot of his videos is the effort he puts into putting actual dessert food under the sculpture work

So many of his desserts & pastries have at least 5 layers of different textures & flavors. Fruit jams, caramel, cake, creams, mousse, cookies, meringue, crumb layers etc

That's what makes his work truly impressive to me, especially as someone who quickly got tired of the "knife that turns everything into cake" thing, where it was all basic chocolate cake buried under 13 layers of fondant

It takes amaury's work from an impressive stunt to "if I ate that, it would probably be the best thing I'd eat in my whole life"

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Having a comfort character that has never known comfort in their life is great

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attorneys don't even interrogate you anymore man they just show you their badge like this

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People will blaze truly anything

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i do think a lot of implausible medieval plot devices make more sense when considering the fact that these people simply did not have glasses

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pre-fame hozier tweeting this casually in 2012 like it isn’t the best fucking joke i’ve ever heard in my life, decimating all my brain cells instantly

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works in progresses

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BEST QUEERBAIT TV SHOW - ROUND 1

**While the original Star Trek aired at a time where there was no queer representation on TV, Kirk and Spock have been revisited many times, notably in the ongoing projects: Alternate Original movie saga and Strange New Worlds. The prolonged insistence in keeping them friends while knowing and squeezing the most iconic gay ship in TV history could be read as malicious intent. Eye of the beholder.

Submitted propaganda under the cut:

Star Trek:

I mean, the OG ship. The looks, the touching, pon far

Invented slash, though they weren't intentional queerbait at the time I mean… Look at them. Responsible along with Spn for inventing omegaverse. Modern day iteration actors will NOT stop making jokes about the ship, and saying the ship name at comic cons. I'm losing my mind I'm losing my goddamn mind. I'm getting fucking queerbaited by the oldest slash ship,,,

Red vs. Blue:

It was the early 2000s. It was a bunch of straight men playing Halo. It was a formative ship dynamic for me. When the voice actors started to talk about it earnestly and not jokingly it was over for me. They were on a team with the world's most flamboyant man, named Donut, nicknamed Officer Hot Pants, referred to as every pink cartoon character in the book. And they still came out of that show as the gayest characters.

-from the VERY first scene if the show, these two men are just like that. -been queerbated so long its old enough to DRIVE. -in an interview long ago, the actor for Grif said that he (Grif) had a crush on Simmons. -characters in the series have said that they are like an old married couple. -DO NOT SEPARATE THEM, they will not function without the other (see season 15 for such cases) -after being ran over by a tank, Simmons gave Grif half of his body, literally. -its rare to not see them at each other's side talking and bickering with each other. -"do you ever wonder why we're here?" "it's one of life's greatest mysteries"

They start the series, they end the series. They’ve got this odd couple dynamic going on, have canonically (for at least like. Five years? Before it got retconned) had alien magic induced sex in a supply closet, and had a little brokeback mountain moment riffing off of i cant quit you. They claim to hate each other and yet can be found doing everything always together. The one time they split up Grif went crazy talking to his little Simmons volleyball until he found simmons again.

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The first asexual person I met outside of the internet was a 65 year old woman.

I’d been interning with her as an artist/executive assistant for some time. To put a long story short she’d developed a tremor that kept her from doing a certain amount of studio work, so in between sending emails and invoices for her I’d chip in and help with line art or drafting on longer projects. A lot of it was the two of us sitting in her basement studio, doing our own thing, waiting for the phone to ring. We got to talking a lot. I’d just moved across the country and was still finding my footing.

There was a handyman she had over occasionally — he was a personal friend who enjoyed her company more than she enjoyed his. She didn’t dislike him by any means, but he definitely had feelings for her that she didn’t reciprocate. One day, after he’d come over to repair something-or-other and left, she and I started talking about relationships.

She asked if I had a boyfriend. I told her I wasn’t interested in being in a relationship with anyone and that I’d never had a desire to be in a relationship. Admittedly, I was bracing for the “You’ll meet the right person someday” response. I knew it generally came from a place of care, but it never changed how much I dreaded to hear it. I really respected my mentor and I was prepared to nod along to whatever response she gave me. Instead of anything I expected her to say, she just kind of nodded and said, “Me neither. I think I’m — what’s the term — asexual?”

I was ecstatic. I told her I was asexual, too. I saw her sigh in relief, the same way I did. I couldn’t believe it.

We didn’t get much work done that day, we just started talking about our experiences. She’d been married once when she was younger and even during that period of her life her disinterest in a sexual relationship didn’t change. She had a roommate after graduating college who confessed to having feelings for her and she had to tell her “It’s not that I don’t like girls, it’s that I don’t like anybody.” The roommate harbored enough bitterness over this that they had to split ways. Her mother told her that she would quote “rather have a gay daughter than a daughter who didn’t fancy anyone at all” unquote.

I didn’t have nearly as many experiences as she did, but I was able to share my own for the first time. I shared how it was easier to say I was taking time to work on myself than to say I had no interest in being in a relationship. We talked about the words “You’ll meet the right person someday” and “You’ll know when you’re in love” and “Don’t worry, one day you’ll meet some guy that changes everything.” As if something was broken.

“I’ve been alive for sixty five years,” my mentor told me, “and I’ve never felt like I was missing something, even if everybody told me I was.”

Currently, my mentor lives with her parrot, her cats, and her backyard-wildlife pals in a house that she owns. She makes art and hosts community art groups and volunteers at care homes and is the most self-fulfilled woman I’ve ever met. And she loves her life. She loves the people she knows and they love her, too. If I could be half as cool as she is when I grow up, I think that’d be pretty amazing.

“Asexuality” isn’t a problem to be fixed or a phase to grow out of. Sometimes you’re fifteen and sometimes you’re sixty-five. I knew in my heart that older asexual people existed but it changed me completely to meet one. We were here before and we always will be.

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made me think of some of you <3

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On the subject about parents needing to control their child's reading and invade their privacy in order to "protect" them from "inappropriate material:

Until I was in....college? At least? The vast, vast majority of the books I read were either a) assigned by my school or b) (the vast majority of my reading) provided to me by my mother.

My mom is a librarian. She filled our rooms with books, picked especially for us. She pointed out books on the shelves in our home library (separate from our bedroom shelves) that she thought we would like. She bought us books for birthdays, Christmas, and just stacks of recommendations. She once paid me $10 to read one of the Cirque Du Freak books because she said I needed "to be exposed to bad literature."

She respected my privacy in room, didn't go through my belongings. She explicitly pointed out to us that she wouldn't know if we took a particular book of the shelf, as long as we returned it, if we didn't want her to know we were reading it. She purposely brought us books that she didn't care for herself, because she thought we might find them valuable or enjoyable.

And if we wanted to read something she thought might upset or disturb us, she would explain why. She wouldn't stop us from reading it - just ask us to check in with her, to talk through it.

And so when I read something that upset or disturbed me, I would go to her. She would listen and talk through it with me.

If she said she didn't think I would like something, or that a book might disturb me, or that she thought I should wait until I was older, I listened to her.

She didn't need restrictions or control to protect me. Because she proved I could trust her.

Controlling kids is never about "protecting" them. It's just about control.

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Im gonna be so real can yall actually talk about ways we can support trans women in the UK instead of giving all the attention to fucking JKR. I already know that Harry Poter sucks, I wanna know how to actually HELP people. Something something you have to love the oppressed more than you hate the oppressor

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if you're arguing on the side of censoring the internet even more, i am revoking your faggot license. you cant call yourself that anymore. you dont get to say "idk i think its normal to upload your government id to look at porn" and call yourself a faggot because NO FAGGOT ALIVE would say that shit, bitch. die