vey-myname - Tumblr blog

vey-myname · 1 year ago

Text

[012] • if you’ll let me | take the stage!

prev | masterlist | next

word count: 3.4k | cw: family issues, mentions of alcohol

time flies by so fast, you didn’t expect it to be friday already. today marks the day that you’ll have your first alcoholic drink ever. you weren’t one to party or to drink so you wanted to be cautious about your tolerance. regardless, you still think that passing the audition is worth celebrating.

your last class has just ended, curse the heavens for allowing a class to end at 7 pm. you had told your mom that you’ll be going home late since you wanted to finish your tasks at the 24/7 study nook near your university so that all you’ll be doing this weekend is to snooze off. but of course, that’s a lie. if she knew you were out drinking with friends, you know it won’t end all pretty. it sucks.

but hey, it’s time to loosen up. you’re in college now, after all.

you were fixing your things when a familiar voice calls out to you, walking towards you.

it was childe.

“how was class?” he greets you with a smile. ever since monday, whenever you two would plan to meet to eat or hang out, childe made it a habit to pick you up from your classes. it was really endearing.

you smile back at him, zipping your bag as you wear it on your shoulder.

“pretty okay. got called for recitation but i think i did good.” you share with him. “let’s go?”

“i’ll lead the way,” childe started walking off with you beside him, exiting the premises of your building and eventually your university.

“i would be lying if i said i don’t feel… nervous meeting your friends for the first time.” you admit out loud to him, fiddling with the straps of your bag.

“don’t be! they’re only mean to me,” childe laughs, his laughter putting you in a sense of peace which made you chuckle a bit. “two of them are really big fans of yours though, so i hope that won’t make you feel awkward.”

“oh, i have fans?” you wondered, looking up at him curiously. you never expected to hear that. sure, your friends, especially jean, always told you that they’re your fans but you always thought of it as friendly support. it caught you off guard knowing that beyond your friends, you do have people who genuinely admire you and your skills. it felt pretty foreign to you but you won’t lie that that also made you feel a bit more confident about yourself.

childe raises a brow at you, followed by a huff. he points to himself as he peers at you.

“what do you call me then?”

“a friend of mine?” you answered, quite unsure about what you were supposed to say. “well, my partner too.”

the last line you added made childe go a bit crazy inside, not expecting to hear that response. moreover, you said it so seriously which didn’t really help his situation.

“yeah…” flustered, childe coughs. “well, if it wasn’t obvious enough, i’m also your fan.”

he proclaims it so proudly, you can see his smile getting smug. you chuckle at him.

“you never mentioned this during our first dinner,” you respond.

“i didn’t want to scare you off…” childe pouts, response sheepish. “but yeah, i’ve been watching your competitions a lot. you’re a really different person when performing.”

“got to impress my mother,” you sigh a bit. “it’s hard when you’re the daughter of a popular person. the pressure is overwhelming.”

childe takes in your reply, surprised to hear your feelings. there’s so much for him to learn about you.

“it must have been hard carrying all that burden, huh?”

“it always has been.”

you two reached the agreed place. it was a bar not too shabby. considering it was a friday, there were a lot of people drinking.

childe ensured to keep you close to him so as not to lose you in the crowd while he scans the place for his friends.

“childe! over here!” kazuha waves his hand, catching the ginger’s attention to which he led the way.

“oh my god…” the twins say in unison, both staring at you in awe. you could swear that they both look like they were going to cry.

you shoot everyone a smile and a small bow.

“have you guys been here for a while?” childe asks, setting his bag down on the chair.

“yeah, you’re fucking late.” scaramouche retorts, fixing his glasses.

“don’t listen to him. we just arrived.” kazuha laughs.

“this is [name] by the way,” childe introduces you as he offers your seat for you.

“hello everyone,” you greeted them, albeit shyly. “it’s nice to meet you all. i’m childe’s friend.”

you thank childe for his kind gesture, settling yourself down. childe sits beside you.

“i can’t believe she’s real…” aether gasps, too busy processing that he’s actually meeting one of his idols. you laugh at his reaction.

“i’m lumine, by the way,” his twin introduces herself. “this is aether, my twin brother. we love watching dancesport competitions a lot.”

“nice to meet you lumine and aether,” you wave at them.

“scaramouche. unfortunately, i’m friends with them.” the guy with the purple hair introduces himself… almost against his will?

“i study at zapolyarny too. i’m a medtech.”

“must be stressful,” you comment.

“exactly. i deserve to drink tonight.” he leans back at his chair, crossing his arms.

“i’m kazuha,” the guy beside childe introduces himself. “i traveled from inazuma to celebrate you two’s success.”

“that’s sweet of you,” you compliment. “nice to meet you all!”

“is venti coming over?” childe asks.

“nobody knows, he might just appear out of the blue.” lumine responds.

everybody continued getting to know each other even after the drinks got served. you learned that the golden twins met childe during a competition while scaramouche and childe became friends since they knew each other from high school. kazuha, on the other hand, was childe’s co-trainee when childe was training at inazuma.

you also learned that childe knew a lot of the coaches and have become friends with them as well. to be fair, during your first dinner together, all you two talked about was the auditions so all of this information is new to you.

“am i late to the party?” your conversation got cut short when a random yet familiar voice cuts in. everyone looked at the source, including you. your eyes widen a bit.

“venti?” you blinked.

“[name]! it’s so nice to see you again!” venti gives you a quick side hug which you reciprocated, happy to see another familiar face.

“we did not save a seat for you, mr. latecomer.” lumine chuckles as she jokes, pulling the vacant chair near her.

“my knees are old as hell, have mercy on me,” venti fake cried, still as dramatic as before.

“why were you late though?” kazuha inquires, taking a chug.

“do college students these days not do pre-games anymore?” venti sighs.

“just say you drank before you arrived here.” scaramouche snides in as he pours himself another round.

“i didn’t expect [name] to be the one to drink though?” venti comments, looking your way.

“i actually don’t drink,” you affirm his statement. “this is my first time drinking, in fact. we’re about to find out my alcohol tolerance.”

“don’t worry, you have childe. he’ll take care of you,” kazuha grins, elbowing childe who is seated beside him.

childe almost spits his drink.

“[name] can i have your autograph on my forehead.” aether requests, slurring his words a bit even though it has just been his second drink.

“yeah…” lumine face palms. “i can’t drink too much, this guy can’t hold his alcohol.”

everybody was immersed in their own worlds, holding conversations with each other. you can hear scaramouche, lumine, and childe bickering with each other with kazuha as their amused audience. aether… you were unsure if he’s still with everyone but you can notice that he’s out of it as he’s staring off into the distance. you were just happy to be there.

with venti seated beside you, he taps your arm gently, catching your attention.

“what about your mother?” he whispers. you can hear his worry behind his query.

you shrug. “i lied to her. i’ll just face the consequences when they appear.”

venti sighs a little at your response. after all, he knows about your relationship with your mother as you opened this topic up before you parted ways with mondstadt’s group.

childe’s gaze flickers over at you and venti, curiosity filling him. he could see venti’s worried look at you, making him wonder what you two were talking about.

a little later on, venti was able to convince everyone to play king’s cup, claiming he was ready and he really was. it was proven true by him showing his deck of cards to everyone at the table.

aether has been sleeping ever since he got his autograph, just not on his forehead. his last words before passing out was “can you make this a tattoo? i need it on my forehead.” seems like he’s really adamant about having your signature on his forehead.

by the time everyone called it quits, venti was the first to leave the bar, not until he greeted other bar-goers. apparently, this is not a new scene to their friend group, even calling him “mx. congeniality” by them.

kazuha had paid for all the drinks even though he only promised to pay for the first round. he said everyone deserved it and that he missed being around his friends. he had to leave as well to help lumine bring her brother home. the trio left an hour after venti left, leaving you, childe, and scaramouche at the bar.

you can see the sour look on scaramouche’s face when he checked his phone before putting it down again.

“your mom?” childe asks, sipping on his beer.

“wished it was,” scaramouche leans over the table, cushioning his cheek in his palm. “guess she just doesn’t care about me at all, huh.”

you silently listen to their conversation.

“i messaged her that i’ll be going home late because we’re out drinking but she just left me on read.” scaramouche added. though he’s masking everything he’s feeling, those feelings in question are seeping through his words.

“i’d rather have her scold me than leave me be, you know? at least i can feel she cares for me one way or another.”

“oh,” you hold your drink close to you. you didn’t expect to have a conversation about mothers out of the blue, the topic that hits too close to home.

“something on your mind?” childe looks your way, noticing your hold on your drink. you shake your head though it was a lie.

“got mommy issues too like me, [name]?” scaramouche smirks. is this his way of coping?

you drank a bit of your cocktail. “since the day i was born, yeah.” you try to humor your own suffering. it’s like his coping mechanism is contagious.

childe raises his brows in curiosity but says nothing in reply.

“bet we’d be great friends than ajax and i are.” scaramouche muses, clapping his hands.

“ajax…” you trail off, your gaze focusing on the man beside you.

the way his name rolled off your tongue made childe feel things that he couldn’t even reply to his friend. it felt too intimate to be called by his name, especially by you. he felt paralyzed.

relax, it’s just some sort of happy crush because she’s your idol, right? childe convinces himself internally.

“yup, that’s me,” childe laughs half-heartedly, trying to mask his emotions.

right?

scaramouche’s eyebrow raises.

“you never told her your real name?”

childe only grins in response.

“you’re fucking lame.”

you share a laugh with them before clearing your throat.

it wouldn’t hurt sharing a piece of yourself, would it?

“we… really do everything we can just to get our mother’s attention, don’t we?” you start off, smiling but you can’t deny the sadness laced in your expression. you were sure they noticed that too.

“i don’t mean to be dramatic nor do i want to paint my mom in a bad light but it’s not all rainbows and sunshine with me and my mother.” you admit to your two companions, both of them listening intently to your words. suddenly, the attention they’re giving you made you a bit nervous which made you take a quick sip from your drink.

“i just want to be good enough for her and for others honestly,” you laugh bitterly. “but at the same time, i want to be good enough for myself too, not minding what other people think.”

they continue to listen silently, chugging their own drinks occasionally.

“in short, i really want to pursue latin but my mother keeps pushing standard for me, saying that i must continue her legacy. but even though i pursued standard, even though i brought home back to back wins during nationals, it still wasn’t enough for her.”

childe blinks, eyes widening when he realizes that everything you’re opening up are the answers to his question.

“is that why you agreed with me when i said you don’t vibe with standard?”

you nodded in response.

“instead of loving what i do, i just ended up hating it. that’s why i took a break from ballroom to at least mend my hatred.”

“well that puts things into perspective,” scaramouche breaks his silence. “i can relate. i only took medtech because my mother said she wanted to have a child who’s inclined in the medical field.”

“what do you really want to take?” you ask out of curiosity.

“i wanted to be a diplomat but what i want doesn’t matter,” scaramouche scoffs. “if taking up medtech would appease my mother then so be it.”

you frowned at his response yet you couldn’t help but to understand why he did what he did. after all, you did the same.

“it’s not selfish to do what you want for yourself too, scaramouche,” you blurt out. “my mother doesn’t even know i’m part of the fatui group now.”

scaramouche only looks at you, brow raised at your words.

“…i know.” he grumbles.

the three of you continue to talk about random matters until scaramouche decided he wanted to go home. he left the two of you together, bidding a quick goodbye. but before he left, as he passed by your seat, he stopped to give you a fist bump. you found that to be quite surprising yet endearing.

with only the two of you left at your table, you play with the orange garnish decorating your glass. seeing the pigment of the fruit, you couldn’t help but smile as it reminded you of the ginger beside you.

which reminded you…

“i’m quite taken aback by you, childe,” you break the silence, looking at your friend. “you’ve mostly been quiet tonight. is something occupying your mind?”

childe chuckles at your question. “worried about me so much, miss [name]?”

you swear you rolled your eyes at his reply.

“after spending tonight with you, i just realized that there’s so much to learn about you,” he answers. “and if you’ll allow me, i want to get to know you better.”

why does he have to be so smooth with his words?

“only if i’ll get the honor to know you better as well, dear.” you respond, unconsciously playing along. is it the alcohol doing its work or is it your competitive spirit responsible for your current demeanor? who knows.

childe rests his cheek on his palm the moment he propped his arm on the table, looking at you intently.

“be my guest.”

you rest both of your arms on the table, arms on top of each other as you return his gaze.

“i answered your question already, though,” you pout a little. “won’t i get my answer too?”

childe huffs, leaning back in his seat.

“honestly, i genuinely don’t know why i don’t compete,” he frankly answers your question. “i just don’t think it’s for me you know?”

“lies, ajax.” you glare at him, unamused by his response.

“enjoying my name a little too much, aren’t we, [name]?” childe teases you, making your brows furrow a little as you felt a little flustered.

“i don’t know if i’ve mentioned this already but i only started doing ballroom as a hobby. competing never crossed my mind.” childe scrunches his nose, playing with his beer’s bottle cap. you watch him fiddle with the tiny metal, waiting for him to continue.

“i’ve had a few issues with some of my previous partners too. they always tell me i lead them on but in my defense, i was only being professional. you know the themes in latin right?”

you nod.

“so it was always a hassle for me to find a permanent partner for ballroom that i can compete with without having any strings attached. you know how vital it can be to stick with a partner until you both decide to call it quits.”

childe drinks the rest of his beer.

“though i can’t help but think that maybe it’s a me problem too?” he laughs. “regardless, i’ve always told them beforehand that i’m only here to learn and have fun. to do my part as a dancer. after all, i know that my strongest points as a dancer are my expressions and connection with my partner so i make sure i weaponize that.”

“to be fair, i agree. you really know how to put on a great performance.” you compliment him, reminiscing about your auditions. it reminded you of how he maintained his eye contact with you as he counted under his breath to guide you.

“i take pride in that skill of mine,” he smirks proudly. “thank you for recognizing that.”

“of course. i can’t wait to learn more from you.”

“that is if the coaches will let us partner up for the rest of the year. they might end up sending us to perform right away if they see our chemistry as partners.” childe chuckles.

“now that’s a reach,” you laugh. “but i’d really love to continue partnering with you. we’ve somehow established a rapport with each other and i think that plays a role in good partnership.”

childe doesn’t respond right away, taking in what you just said. i mean, to be fair, you were right. despite only knowing each other for a week, he can’t deny the connection the both of you have built so far.

noticing the silence, you blink a few times as you realize what you just said. you felt awkward asking him to be your partner out of the blue.

“ah but if you wish to explore…” you trail off.

“no, no,” childe cuts you off, waving his hands in front of him.

“i’d love to be your partner. if you’ll let me.”

there’s only so much you can take honestly and you feel like this is all an overload. way too much for you to handle. you can’t help but be reminded about what diluc and eula told you in your group chat. now, that doesn’t help the situation.

you could only mumble an okay to him, breaking eye contact with him to return your attention to your empty glass.

silence continue to prosper between the two of you, taking interest in the most unnecessary things just to keep your minds off the previous conversation.

“but [name]…” childe gently starts. you hum in response as you play with your straw.

“i hope you don’t have to worry about carrying all the burden on your own. you can always talk to me if you want to let them out. i’ll always be here for you if you need someone.”

hearing his words, you could only hung your head low. you let the strands of your hair cover your face to conceal your expression. childe doesn’t know how much that meant to you.

“…likewise, childe. thank you.” you could only say a few words to answer him, feeling overwhelmed with the events that have unfolded.

it felt weird that you’ve heard similar words of kindness and support and yet this is the first time you felt this way. all warm and flustered. perhaps it was because it’s childe saying them? you were unsure of the answer to solve your confusion.

starting tonight, you decided to just let things play out the way they are supposed to. you accepted that there are so many things for you to know and learn beyond just dancesport.

❀ author’s notes: i didnt know how to end it!! but as u can see i got carried away in writing again 😁

˚₊· taglist: open~ send an ask or comment to be added! *ੈ✩‧₊˚ @kyon-cherri @tendo-shairdye @youraggedybitch

#smau #socmed au #childe x f! reader #childe x fem!reader #childe x reader #childe x reader smau #genshin x reader #genshin x reader socmed au #genshin x fem!reader #genshin x reader smau

20 notes · View notes