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I am reading Homestuck for the first time (Weeks 8-10)
I'm too lazy and gay to make one single post a week. Anyway!
Andrew Jeremiah Hussie is eschewing the storytelling convention of cause and effect left and right and it's really testing my reading comprehension. I'm really really enjoying myself, even as I begin to compare other things in life to homestuck. My quality of life will never return to where it was pre-homestuck, but I feel more cultured. More alive. I really like Homestuck, I am a true believer, and that cannot be undone.
I am also 100% in the trolls now, they're here.
Week 8:
1579: musk slut
1582: Rose’s imps don’t seem shadowy at all, but it seems like that might just be what they’re made of. The other guys were tar, these guys are chalk and marble.
1592: Knight of Time! I had a feeling there might be an “of time” because of that linkedin post, but I wasn’t certain it’d apply to Dave. Obvious open question of what everyone else is “of.”
1595: I hope there wasn’t any lore in there because I didn’t read it
1599: Almost missed the ghost hand saving the bunny
1609: She looks a lot like the shadow queen and is being handed a crown. Sus!
1613: Ahhh but the light queen has a scar and missing arm.
1617: YOOOO
1621: I can see 12 pages into the future. mogs the camera
1626: Seer of Light! Interesting title for someone presumably asleep on the shadow planet.
1630: Scar, missing arm, much like Spades Slick AND the Light Queen!!! And, on double checking, the Shadow Queen. When the Light Queen un-prototyped herself, she lost the tentacles, jester hat, and scar, and gained an arm. It seems kinda like the scar+arm thing might be similar to whatever it is the kernelsprites do to their respective kingdoms, if not the same thing. Maybe Spades Slick jumps into a kernelsprite. Who knows! (Remembered later on that the harlequin doll that prototyped John’s sprite first had a fucked up eye and missing arm. Still weird that that happened to Spades Slick!)
1637: I’m remembering that ancient shot of the prototyped swordbird hovering over the remains of Cal. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!
1641: HEEEEELLL YEEAAAAAAAHHHHH
1651: That’s allowed!?
1655: 100% on the money, mwah
1663: Cutest shit ever
1669: I really like that Jasper’s secret was “Meow,” but also a genetic code? Aside from that I’m happy everyone’s +1 is still in play, chillin on everyone’s planet. No clue how John’s Dad got to the Land of Wind and Shade! It’s also interesting to see the genetic code on Rose’s walls, being coded as a MEOW, being the secret Jasper told her. Also interesting to pear with the fact everyone’s Pesterchum handles (with the exception of John’s current handle but not his old handle) is genetic code.
1674: I had a feeling reading this would clear up a few points I was stuck on, and I was right! Here, it’s clarified that Spades Slick is an alternate version of Jack Noir from the trolls’ session, who was exiled along the way. Same with Snowman being an alternate version of the Black Queen. It’s also pointed out to me that there’s a server/client relationship with the Exiles.
1736: Well I have an idea how that Sassacre time loop closes.
Q: Why might both the White King and Queen have abdicated just to aid PM in delivering Jade's package? Having seen its power in [S] Jack: Ascend, what do you think is inside the box?
A: They said from the start that light was fated to lose, so this might have been a “fuck it, let’s try it” moment.
Q: Why do you think gallowsCalibrator tricked John into getting killed by his denizen? Why do the trolls care so much about the kids?
A: It seems like at some point in some way the kids are going to fuck up the trolls’ game, but the trolls’ actions aren’t exactly completely revenge-oriented.
Q: What implications might Dave's future time powers have for their group? Why did Hussie refrain from showing us Dave's entry to the medium?
A: I’m sure Dave’s time powers will be used sparingly and keep the timeline very sane. Maybe Time Shit is the reason we didn’t see Dave enter the medium, but I mainly think it’ll be because something cool hatched from the egg.
Q: Why does Lil Cal have a dream self?
A: I’m not sure to what extent the dreams are dreams and you can manifest shit in them. Maybe Dave dreams of his brother’s puppet, maybe Cal is alive and is also asleep and dreaming.
Week 9:
1846: Homestuck predicted AI art, sad to discover Dave is an AI bro
1857: First mention of some outer gods type shit, hopefully not a consequence of those cool spooky needles.
1873: December 3rd is my birthday 😊
1884: BRO HE’S HUFFING THAT THING
1902: Man I’m curious about the relationship between everyone’s +1. It’s weird to me that John’s grandma was ectogooped and not his dad.
1905: Did Dave’s brother even make lil cal…
1915: COLONEL SASSACRE!?
1928: Halley has eyes and a smile and Bec has no eyes and a frown. I feel like we’re gonna see Bec get ecto-cloned in a manner similar to the mutant cat.
1929: Hehe, knew it was Jack
1939: So there’s a reason we don’t see it…
1943: Yooo john sheets
1961: YA LOST ME
1972: This is fucked lmao
1987: The Harley line are freaks FOR REAL
1988: This recap mentions the frog temple that would later root itself near Jade’s house, and I actually am thinking about that. The frog temple meteor is shown inside a crater on top of a flat, dark bottom. The frog temple on Earth is shown to be built on top of cooled lava flowing into a crater where a meteor landed. Further, the frog temple the exiles live in is right beside a huge hole where the volcano used to me. This might be another stable time loop thing. Maybe the meteor temple with bec and sburb crash lands beside the volcano, and then is sort of recreated? And then somehow that temple gets uprooted into being the meteor temple. This recap also seems to be the only way to know what happened on 1961 because on god there is no mention of a bunny and then the bunny just appears with no explanation
Q: How does the process of ectobiology work? Is Dave's bro really his brother, and are John and Jade's grandparents really their grandparents? Where does John's dad fit in with this?
A: Ectobioloy makes a clone of a thing using its paradoxified goop. I don’t think Dave’s bro is necessarily his dad though. In an even sampling, 50% mom and 50% bro, then Dave would have the same genetic relationship to his brother as one would with their dad. But the goop mixing wasn’t the same process of chromosome pairs doing their thing that guarantees a 50 50 split, it was just a mixture of goop. He could share 25% of his DNA with his brother, or any other percentage!
Q: How do all three bunnies that John receives relate to one another? Who do you think Jade's pen pal is?
First, Nicholas Cage returns the bunny to the props department of that movie, and from there it changes hands at various Hollywood auctions until somehow Dave is able to snatch it up. Dave sends it to John, who later fucks it up with oil and shit. John gives the fucked up bunny to baby rose, who repairs it later in life, and sends it to John. John gives the repaired bunny to baby Jade, who upgrades it with the help of her pen pal, none other than her own grandfather (going by how he talks and the time shenanigans in play). Jade then sends it back to John, but it’s intercepted by the plot.
Q: How was Bec created, and how might he become important to the plot?
He was made from the DNA of Halley and whatever genetic code was in Rose’s book. It’s probably fine! Probably doesn’t indicate anything that Jack Noir is most likely the one to have set it up.
Q: What are the implications of someone's dream self dying, as Jade's did in [S] Descend?
Probably means nothing happens when they dream, which means no more future vision. I hope Jade isn’t too upset about it, if I see her sad I WILL take it out on my surroundings.
Q: What does the reckoning do? What might it mean for the kids' session that theirs has started early? Do you think they're doomed to fail?
The reckoning seems to be what ends the game session by blowing up Skaia and the planets. The kids might be doomed to fail, cause anything goes in a webcomic, but I’d rather see them overcome.
Week 10:
1989: GREEN AND PINK MOONS!!! TROLL PLANET!!!
2011: Tentative favorite
2032: I wonder if the exiles mimic the tropes of the other planet. If this game is representative of typical entertainment, maybe the highly civic Earth exiles are based on Alternia’s entertainment, while Alternia’s exiles mimic a mafia webcomic on Earth.
2055: This is how I met Lexi
2062: Yo
2074: I feel the weight of millions of teenage brain chemistries forever altered.
2099: Shit I’d ban frogs too if they were always this cryptic.
2117: Can the paraplegic community please tell me if this is good representation so I know how to feel
2119: SAGITTARIUS BABYYYYYY!!!
2145: I know you, Vriska
2161: Competing for favorite. Also these fucking amateurs need a better roleplay format. All you need is third person and quotations!! Come on!!!
2164: TINKERBULL!!!!!!!
2178: Leo point
2179: Not feeling so hyped about Sagittarius anymore…..
2184: I meant to note earlier that the various roleplay accidents don’t seem to be the same accident, which I assumed they would be.
2188: Catgirl and Gamzee will be my co-favorites, no doubt putting me in line with virtually everybody else. These guys suck!
2190: Oh she’s *gotta* be dead
2191: dreamworks face at the camera
2195: dreamworks face at the camera
2222: Nightmare blunt rotation
2253: Oh yeah, it’s all comin together~
2280: My 9th ever note predicted how much of a freak Equius was going to be about this.
2282: He’s NICE with it!!!
2293: Man
2295: Why are they suits
2302: Man Troll Jack is just the realest
2311: Say…. This guy wasn’t ever a tumblr sexyman was he?
Q: Of the nine trolls introduced so far (plus one about to be introduced), who are your favorite? Who are your least favorite?
A: Gamzee and Nepeta are neck and neck. I identify strongly with Gamzee’s oppressively chill vibe and Nepeta’s animal autism. I would invite them both to my server. Conversely, I’ve been granted a powerful understanding of Vriska’s place in the culture. She’s done enough to be vehemently condemned, but there’s enough still there that I could see how some people latch on. Unlike Equius, who just sucks.
Q: What can you glean about Alternian society? Who is at the top of the hemospectrum, who is at the bottom, and where does Karkat fit into it?
A: Seems to be a spectrum with red at the bottom and purple at the top, and Karkat at the very rock bottom.
Q: ,,,wha+ wood 7our +7ping quirk be,,,?
A: Vile leans back on his throne, his eyes narrow, and his smirk wide. His answer occurred to him immediately, but he didn’t blurt it out. The windup before the punch. “A superior roleplay format,” he calls. “To show these amateurs how it’s done.”
Q: What catalyzed the cycle of revenge between Vriska and her former FLARP partners? What consequences has it had, and do you think it'll threaten the success of the trolls' Sgrub session?
A: Seems like Doc Scratch meddling is the catalyst, but I’d hesitate to say he’s the cause. He’s kinda right, he sort of just pointed Vriska in a direction. It’s gonna cause a lot of mistrust leading into the Sgrub game, which probably won’t have any consequences.
Q: Who is Doc Scratch, and who is his equivalent in the kids' universe? Why do you think he's meddling with the trolls?
The shit he’s doing to the trolls may be for the purpose of getting Lord English in play. It’s not lost on me that the space server that summons that demon is shaped like the last GameFAQs server sent by Rose. He seems equivalent to Bec, unless there’s more than one unique special genetic code lying around. And who’s the kids’ equivalent to Lord English? Ass pull: Jack Noir.
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I am reading homestuck for the first time (Week 7)
Farming up all these mushrooms. Pain in the ass.
I'm interested how the relationship between Troll and Human is gonna work out, and also, given how the fandom is focused on the trolls, if the story will also focus on the trolls past a certain point. STILL very curious about the trolls, cultural osmosis has hyped up the trolls, I wanna know about em!!
Week 7:
1358: I found the Dead End of Proper Nouns, a series of several lizards. Agents, the Heir, the Slumbering One. It’s noteworthy to me that I found an amber-fied firefly much like the one found by the Wandering Vagrant. Also interesting that we’re getting Underlings in different colors, including a pretty light grey. The Heir from earlier refers to John, and him showing up pleased the Agents. Imps hate frogs, frog temple. Explored the entire thing *then* noticed the map…
1371: Further evidence of furries’ affinity for Jenga which I first observed at Fursonacon
1379: It would be funny if they just never use the ability to draw and create whatever they want. They just fuckin forget about it.
1382: What does this mean
1391: “No more psychic than you” probably means nothing
1394: Confirmation of the thing I basically already knew
1406: Women LOVE breaking toilets!!
1407: These are DEFINITELY the four planets we saw WV draw, which puts John on the inky black one and Rose on the yellow cloudy one. Jade’s probably gonna get the volcano one, which leaves Dave with the odd cog-in-a-rock planet.
1431: Seems like they might all have cool titles. John the Heir, Rose the Seer.
1435: Jade’s grandpa had one of those tar basilisks as a trophy I think!
1461: AR? Is called an Agent here, and I thought those were distinct from (and above) Underlings. Also stands out to me that PM is here when, seemingly, she was supposed to be on the light planet. At least in Jade’s dream.
1471: That explains the trophy. Fascinating to me that he has the copy of Sassacre’s.
1487: It does NOT explain the trophy!! He left it!!! Guess he killed a different one.
1499: Glad Rose’s mom is alive because man that’s wacky
1524: Exiles are former Agents, still unsure if Agents are underlings. Agents do seem different from underlings, classic example being WV’s blunt teeth. The timeline is wacky, then. PM in the present seems to be on both the light planet and oil planet, and what seems to be Spades Slick is presently on the shadow planet but will in the future be exiled into the plot of the midnight crew. Possibly a different sburb session?
1525: The symbol pestering Jade is the same symbol shown on the shirt of that mysterious foul creature.
1526: HE’S BACK
1530: We’re reaching a higher density of troll content
1532: That is 100% unambiguously Diamonds Droog
1535: I see one of these things with boobs and my first thought is that it’s Snowman.
1543: SHE BAD!!!! (Book club observation: This might be the Exile who was talking to Rose)
1554: Is this the same sword? I seem to remember PM’s sword was less Shaped, but it’d be weird if she was given two different swords at different points in the story. Also, bar code. (Book club observation: We went back and confirmed same sword)
Q: How did you like the walkaround? Why do you think John's planet is called the Land of Wind and Shade? Aren't the salamanders great?
A: I’m not a big walkaround guy! I spend the whole thing worrying I missed something important, and this one was kind of a slog. It might have something to do with my laptop but it was very zoomed in and John liked to slide around.
Q: What do you think of our first glimpses of Rose's planet, the Land of Light and Rain? Who is talking to her via the fancy cursive text?
A: Rose really won the lottery until a kaiju comes out of that idyllic rainbow ocean. I think it’s only a matter time. I can only assume it’s Egg Woman speaking to her in cursive, though for a moment the framing seemed to imply it was her mom.
Q: Who showed up to save John in the salamander village? On a similar note, where do you think Rose's mom is going?
A: Granda Harley, in what we can now recognize as a characteristic Time Moment. Rose’s mom, meanwhile, has returned to the sea, presumably to do some lore. She seems involved with the whole sburb thing, much like Grandpa Harley.
Q: What do you predict is in Jade's present to John that PM is trying to get from Jack Noir?
A: All we know is that it must be something visibly wacky.
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I'm reading homestuck for the first time (Weeks 5 and 6)
I keep forgetting to post these and I'm sorry!
I've been enjoying going around telling people homestuck is good actually. That's a role I never got to occupy in my young life as homestuck passed me by. So far zero people have believed me and I don't expect that to change.
I have now seen a picture of a troll! Foul little imp
I *am* left with my first little critique of homestuck: Act 3 felt like it was building to the End of Act 3 flash, like it was trying to outdo End of Act 2. Setting things up almost more for the payoff of the flash than for the sake of the story. I don't think a series of lore bombs is a very good way to structure a story, and I'm worried that's the structure the series is going to take. That said, it *is* fun in the moment, it's only in hindsight that I'm thinking this.
Our dealer and homestuck veteran Char has been writing discussion questions for our weekly book club meetings (sometimes), and I've decided to include those along with my answers.
Week 5
980: I bet If I could pause here I’d see something wacky
1000: Interesting that John changed his name *to* Ectobioloist from something else, especially after the prior reveal that ectobiology is a thing in this setting. ARGH I SHOULD HAVE FINISHED THE PAGE BEFORE WRITING THIS NOTE
1022: Tempted to go back and look… This is the kind of thing I’d miss.
1024: This exchange makes me feel like I’m right about both their parents, but I’m getting a little used to the rug pulled out from under me. I feel like I’m picking up on a kind of rule of threes. If I’m right about something, my attention’s drawn to it once, and then the second time it shows up is confirmation. But if I’m wrong, my attention is drawn to it, then my conclusion is hinted at more blatantly in a “it sure looks like that huh” kind of way, and finally the third time it appears is the rug pull. I can’t think of an example following this format right off the melon, I’m going off pure vibes sleep deprived and on a plane.
1026: There are two towers on that funny moon, and it’s notable to me that Rose’s real life house is based on them.
1033: I know those weary eyes!!!!
1039: I appreciate the harsh spike in Gun Realism
1043: Notable to me that the Peregrine Mendicant’s awesome sword is black in color, when you would expect the Light Guys to have white weapons. If indeed he is a Light Guy as Jade’s dream implied.
1046: I would like to apologize for my repeated misgendering of the Peregrine Mendicant. I did it on purpose out of malice. I’m a DEMON
1049: What does this MEAN
1051: Seems like Rose might have been onto something with her subconscious doodling theory, because it only just occurred to me that this takes place prior to basically every other event. Also what does this MEEEEAAAAAN
1062: Pressure cooker bomb reference
1064: Second coming of decoding foreshadowing. Very notable that they got a potted plant, which I seem to recall was one of the things in the jetpack!
1070: Bro EXECUTED Cal for NO REASON!!! THEN LEFT ON A HOVERBOARD!!! I’m telling you in terms of power scaling Dave’s brother is clearly unstoppable.
1093: This has *gotta* be them.
1096: Kamina glasses…….
1099: What is it with Dr. Hussie and ethnic weddings
1108: I was on board for a mayor and a mailwoman, but I am not here for a cop guy
1110: I feel better about a judge guy.
1133: I’m uncertain about Bec’s nature. For a hellbeast, he seems to also be quite cooperative.
1136: Seems like a paradox in the form of sending items to the past is allowed, but not taking items.
1149: Without a pause button I’m just utterly unequipped to handle this – I wrote BEFORE realizing that Nanna’s note is the same note we saw in John’s dad’s copy of Sassacre’s, except written in John’s copy and dropped into the void. This affects the timeline! And I’m really not sure how. I might need to rescind my earlier comment about Nanna being a willing participant in all this, which seems like it may no longer be true. Somehow this copy goes from the void to John’s dad’s safe, then back around again, presuming it’s the closed time loop it seems to be. No clue how that’s gonna come together.
1152: Is this one of the planets we saw? In the process of checking, I notice that there is a LUMINOUS PLANET with a SINGLE MOON, exactly like the one Jade dreamed about. Going by the art style, that indicates this luminous planet and the shadow planet are the sort of centers of light and dark we’re working with. Anyway, if this is one of the four planets then I think it’s the dark cloudy one, or possibly the not so dark (kinda bright actually) cloudy one. A thought that occurs to me now, days later, is that we have 2/4 kids accounted for in dreamland and the shadow planet also has a moon.
There were no discussion questions for Week 6.
Week 6: If Homestuck Book Club was mpreg our child would have a heartbeat.
1159: I think this is the guy in John’s house and I’m not checking.
1169: That’s a setting-specific captchalogue analogue!!! And it’s the same as Wandering Vagrant’s tattoo!!!!!!!!
1170: Hidden message vibes.
1171: Hidden message vibes intensify…
1177: Standing out to me how things get swapped. Clubs Deuce seems to have swapped here with Hearts Boxcars, and a moment ago, the Spade Key was swapped with the rules for blackjack and the war chest was swapped with the deck of cards. If Clubs and Hearts are paired somehow then that would leave Spades paired up with Diamonds, and the rules for blackjack don’t seem very diamondy. I don’t think that’s what’s going on.
1210: Damn I wish I knew how to play poker
1215: Purple planet with a moon…
1219: I saw that the doom wardrobe whatever it was called was the same as Jade’s, but now with John’s bathtub in play I notice all the inventory options are themed after the four kids.
1353: It finally happened
Q: Where do you think the midnight crew and their foes are from? Who does Spades Slick look suspiciously like, and what do we know of his origins?
A: Spades Slick looks exactly like the Warden guy, and for a moment, a lot like WV/PM. He showed up under almost identical circumstances to them too, wandering a destroyed world, and for some reason, making a city. Or present band of synonyms for Wandering Vagrant are uniquely insistent upon civics, with a mailwoman, a mayor, and a judge. It could be that after worlds are destroyed, these guys show up and make something. It’s unclear to me why, or how to categorize everything. The plot of Midnight Crew centers around a conflict of black vs green, not black and white. They did say darkness always wins, maybe there was some other force (time?) before light? We don’t really know where this interlude falls in the timeline, if it falls anywhere at all. For example, if Spades Slick becomes the Warden, or vice versa. Or the secret third option. If those bar codes are an analogue for captchalogue cards, then it stands to reason that that code can be used to replicate the thing it designates. They could just be clones.
Q: Did you understand... any? of the time fuckery?
A: I followed the thread but I could not retell the story if I tried.
Q: Who is the weird little grey fucker at the end of the intermission?
A: John Stuck
Q: What's Snowman's deal? Will she ever be killed?
She’s clearly an imp-thing turned traitor, but there’s so little to go off of. The o in her name wasn’t green at any point, and she’s not shown to have a power besides taking the world with her if she dies. So she’ll probably die. Former Mayor Hussie isn’t striking me as someone who flinches.
Q: Who of these characters, if any, do you think might reappear in Homestuck?
If nobody else, definitely Spades Slick and Snowman. Maybe Lord English, maybe the rest of the Crew.
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I am reading Homestuck for the first time (Week 4)
As we approach the thousand page mark, I think I have the picture of why homestuck was able to blow out the walls of its niche sensibilities into mainstream appeal. I assume I'd get this answer when the trolls showed up, but no, the answer is that Homestuck is actually good! Going into this, I can't honestly say I expected it to be good. This whole thing was supposed to be a bit, where I power through Homestuck in a year (with the babes) and then cosplay a troll at Dashcon 2. This leads me to reflect on what a bit really is, because when I imagine something done as a bit, I imagine the bit acting as its own motive. You do the bit for the bit. Can you do as a bit something you have more than that one reason for doing? Is this still a bit? It's still funny to get into homestuck in 2024, I think, but can I rightfully still call it a bit when I eagerly await every book club? Much to think about.
These are my notes for week 4:
759: Floored as I am, I’m glad Nanna is a willing agent in all this. That said, the amount of people running around who seem to Know Something is making my neurons fire.
760: The freaking pumpking?
766: This one goes out to all the trans girls named Jade Harley (and the trans guys named Dave Strider whom I forgot to shout out last time)
789: What is Jade’s fursona, why won’t it tell me
790: Jade’s connection to everything is clearly important but it seems like it might be a while before I’m told why. Here’s someone who sees the future, or at least intuits it, who’s the grandaughter of someone with a whole lot of sburbish technology. I feel like I’m missing the same piece to both puzzles.
793: Y-yeah I noticed before this panel!!
797: I’m gonna kill the guy who put this command in. HOWEVER now we know Jade’s sona is a wolf. (Mine is a dragon, and the other bookclubbers are a possum and tiger)
801: VOLCANO!!! MOUNTAIN HERMIT!!!!!!!!!
802: Cowardice.
822: It was pointed out to me that the crossing out of “but not many” in the act 2 flash implies that that sburb meteor hit a long-ass time ago, and this confirms it! Very wacky. I might think they’re not really sburb meteors if not for the established time shenanigans. This seems to imply there’s more than one potential trigger for a meteor.
826: Jade has WAY more friends than her friends do.
829: Permanently unlocked coquettish as a word for Corah to throw at twinks. Need to find a word to pair it with, like how I use “svelte motherfucker” or “coiffed bitch.” Also I like the grand tradition of internet icons from this era casually using slurs. Look up the first appearance of Megalovania RIGHT NOW
835: How could I forget goofy modus foreshadowing………
836: Dave’s brother is so badass he beat up his armed little brother while piloting a puppet. I think in terms of power scaling this could put him above John’s dad.
839: How did I not notice that Rose’s mom opened that secret passage while Rose was in the back fighting a burning tree? Your poking holes in my they-actually-love-each-other theory, Rose’s mom.
844: Chess piece sword that looks SICK
845: During the book club last week, one of us speculated that the lesser items will be removed from the jetpack to make it functional. The thought of doing that – albeit to the code of the object and not the object itself – is vindicated here!
859: CG has GOTTA be one of those wandering vagrant guys.
*Book club note: Someone mentioned the TROLLSLUM, and I only just made the connection that CG is grey. Reading this 5,000 years in the future as I am, that stands out to me………
874: Looks like my house is okay for now….. But damn they GOT Montreal’s ass
893: John’s Dad name reveal???
896: Andrew Hussie predicted Death Stranding.
911: Aint no way this is a shot of John’s Dad’s room.
918: He’s DEAD!?
948: I was right!!!!!!
962: Carapace confirmed! More wondering what the Wandering Vagrant is. I wonder if someone tried to appearify a shadow demon from the past and a machine made him from the goo, mutant kitten style.
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I'm really enjoying my first reading of Homestuck
I forgor to post this after Homestuck Book Club!
In my notes for Week 3 I talk a little about not really knowing how this blew up and how niche it feels, but I think the picture is forming. WV: Ascend demonstrated that even without really knowing what's going on, Homestuck definitely has the narrative pull to bring me along for the ride. Compared to that, a 13 year old trying to read the thing her friends like probably won't care that she's not picking up on all the references and programmer humor.
My discord status has been RANCOROUS for several weeks. I think the time may be nigh to make a second homestuck reference.
Week 3:
539: Not convinced that John’s dad’s room will be much of anything. Maybe that’ll be the point where John learns his dad doesn’t give a shit about harlequins and the harlequin thing was all a misguided attempt to connect with his son! But if that’s what that is then what John walks in and sees is probably a normal room as opposed to like some FMA shit.
543: The combination of a book whose girth is known to be lethal with a system whose velocity is known to be lethal is interesting.
544:
As a metaphor for the disconnect between you and also you’re the guy who knocked over your grandmother’s ashes and cleaned them up like shit. Where are those ashes now, John, were you careful with them?
554: Lethal momentum through a wall, baby!!! I still get credit for seeing the future even when it’s heavily foreshadowed.
556: Southern colonel? ☹
592: Does this guy have Kamina glases…
614: Based on how I’ve heard Dave’s name more than John’s as a fandom outsider, John really kinda is the other guy.
629: Blood Loss in the Big Easy sounds like a made up nonsense phrase that somehow captures the intended vintage vibe but it turns out New Orleans is actually called the Big Easy.
636: I bet I can annoy Char by incorporating the phrase “that’s really all there is to say on the matter” into my vocabulary.
644: TOBY FOX ARRIVAL
645: I’m constantly struck by how niche this all feels. I haven’t gotten any answers to why homestuck blew up like it did, and I think I won’t until I get to the trolls.
651: I bet that mystery silhuette is GG
672: Damning hole in my “this guy is a shadow demon” theory – no sharp teef
687: Lot of king hatred for a guy who isn’t a shadow demon in a cosmology that literally or metaphorically uses chess pieces…
691: Bro eats green… Me too man.
696: CAR DEPENDENCY!!!
699: Chess board…………………
704: Raising my eyebrow at the ominous planet
708: Me reaching this page marks the first time anyone has thought about Tab since the Tab mine collapse in 2013
713: Hidden message vibes from this page.
714: How could I forget sburb is green. Sburb is green, this guy eats green, think about it!
716: I think Cal sacrificed himself to save Dave, hence the face turn to thinking puppets are awesome and being rancorous. Also – kernelsprite prototyped with dead bird!
756: I don’t even know what a cliffhanger is, Andrew Hussie. I am reading this webcomic five thousand years in the future, cliffhangers are nothing to me. Your world is laid bare for me at my leisure.
757: Coolest shit ever. Whole lot going on. Just want to flex that I noticed the sburb rocket is in the crater of Rose’s house, complete with wizard hand. The next crater we see is John’s house, which bizarrely grows a tree, then a sburb fruit, then we see that sburb fruit is also a weird pod that the (other) other guy seems to be living inside, or emering from. After that we see a crater next to a volcano, and we see the meteor actually hit somewhere that’s clearly uninhabited and explicitly an ocean over. Also with a MASSIVE hole where the volcano used to be. There’s a chance GG is a mountain hermit but no matter how you dice it, with only three meteors they were never all going to be accounted for. John’s dad is a sleeper hit, what a badass. Those fools put him in the trick cuffs and now he’s going to tear through hell doomslayer style. Rose’s mom also seems to have a secret tunnel to the lab, which has a spirograph on it! Dave’s brother in the relative present seems like he might actually be the coolest guy ever between the hat and confirmed kamina glasses, so he might actually be 100% the kind of guy Dave thinks he is. Final note: the symbols for latitude and longitude look like the wandering vagrant’s tattoo.
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I am reading Homestuck for the first time
Homestuck Bookclub had to be delayed to Saturday this time, but we'll meet on Thursday this week! Inspired by my shining example, the other newcomer has begun taking notes. Unlike me, recording my thoughts, they're recording everything.
These are my notes from week 2, 215 through 537:
229: I wonder if Rose’s relationship to her mom isn’t going to be the foil I expected. Setting aside what Rose has said, her mom seems like she’s into more established, antiquated versions of what Rose is into, much like John and his dad. John doesn’t recognize the things he has in common with his father, not seeing the forest of “we both like goofy comedy” for the tree of “dad loves harlequins,” and seeing that aspect of his father in isolation, seeing it as something weird and foreign. John is frustrated with his dad, and that affects how he sees his dad and his actions. Rose seems to be interpreting a lot of what her mother does with irony and malice, but it’s easy to imagine something similar. What if Rose is frustrated for her mother, and sees the things they have in common as mockery instead of common ground?
246: I really thought the meteor would get stopped! Char told me sburb ended the world but didn’t say how or when, I kinda thought John and Rose might overcome this part.
251: Evangelion reference
272: Especially ethnic wedding??
278: It’s cute that John is visibly delighted when Rose grabs the copy of Sassacre’s.
303: Homestuck predicted bone hurting juice
311: I think I have heard Dave’s name more than John’s in all these years.
326: Holy shit 1:
12: get my nacho on aAUUUH
34: I really like the UV weedcoin texture
43: David accidentally drew a face too well.
52: I’m actually watching the character David is playing become a better artist
54: I’m not caught up on Prequel, I’m not caught up on Homestuck, but by god, I am caught up on Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff.
331: The little guy doesn’t have a weapon, he’s just getting the shit beat out of him.
338: testing my senses using every button.
362: Further evidence for Rose’s mom actually being cool.
369: You can’t show me this sequence and tell me these two don’t feel deep love for one another. Those definitely were a lot of liquor bottles but I’m ignoring those to support my theory.
382: Dave is the only one who doesn’t seem to avoid his family. Dude seems to really look up to his brother.
421: I appreciate John’s dad in this 2v1. Sure he lost but clearly he was kicking ass up to that point. They can’t even get close to him.
440: Strong suspicion Rose’s kernel will be prototyped with her cat.
442: GG agrees with my strong suspicion and also seems to be able to see the future.
509: I bet this guy’s a shadow demon
510: Real high horse about racist aphorisms ms “especially ethnic wedding”
522: Dave the PC term is “My own personal 9/11”
523: CAPTCHA!? CAPTCHALOGUE!?
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Life gets a lot better when you surround yourself with transgender furries
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Me and my hot girlfriend win :3
You and the characters in your lockscreen wallpaper fight god.
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I am reading homestuck for the first time
When I learned from Strange Aeons' Dashcon video that there would be a Dashcon 2 in one year, and just a few hours from home, the first thing I did is ask my girlfriend if she wanted to go to dashcon with me. She said no. The second thing I did is ask my friends if they wanted to go to Dashcon with me. One friend said, "What if I cosplayed homestuck?" I said, "What if I read all of homestuck in one year and also cosplayed homestuck?" Together with a third friend, we formed the Homestuck Book Club. One has read the series start to finish, one has gotten partway through, and I have nothing in my corner but cultural osmosis. We read a set number of pages every week, and then meet to discuss on Thursdays. These are my notes from Week 1, pages 1 through 214.
7: I feel we haven’t seen the last of the fake arms (captchalogued in the sylladex)
8: Is this the origin of Tumblr people doing one (1) etc?
22: Homestuck beta was deeply alarming
25: RANCOROUS
33: Was sad the arms were taken out of play, glad they’re back in play
35: Just a couple pals joking about how hot the other is hahaaaaaa
39: I feel an ever-present sword of damocles in the form of the thousands of pages yet to come. In these formative pages, it’s easy to imagine every word making a comeback. Bro’s specibus is permanently allocated to hammers, you wanna tell me that’ll never be mentioned again? He said it won’t be relevant, that’s begging to fuck around.
110: She bone up on my data structure til I stack
165: John’s helplessness in this scenario makes me wonder if this gave anyone a Sims-like fetish for being controlled by their friends
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Vile is my main sona! He's a drakanguis, an obscure myth that can be found living in isolation and secrecy the world over. The general assumption is that drakangui populations live in uncontacted tribes, although exploration and surveying of the areas they're known to inhabit has never turned up significant evidence of habitation.

(Commissioned art by MDsf!) For his part, Vile left his home at 17. Those closest to him know certain vague details. For example, that he was born into a warrior caste, and left when he received the highest honor he could hope for.
(Commissioned art by Grimae!) Today, Vile is a jeweler! He kept his sword from back home, but keeps it wrapped up and safely stored in a closet.

(Commissioned art by Drawing_Sofa!) Also he's 8 feet tall!
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someone correcting me on something i said to be silly on purpose and now theyre treating me like im stupid


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Classic New Years 2022 Retrospective Post (real)
Welcome to January 1st 2023, don't look at the timestamp.
2022 was an important year for me. For a long time, I felt immense shame living with my parents and not having a job. I was 22 in 2022, it wasn't that bad, I was fine really. But I always had the sense I should be more. Like I wasn't worthy of the people around me, and I was just a very big child.
In 2022, that changed! I visited my girlfriend for Valentine's day, though at the time we weren't together yet, and I mentioned, "Hey, wouldn't it be cool if I moved to your city?"
One of her housemates got evicted. She's the one who pitched it to me, the rent at her place is cheap, I wouldn't find anything better. I just had a couple months to come up with deposit money and a source of rent.
There were some twists and turns, but that was a motivation I didn't know I lacked. I got my first job that really stuck, a job that I could transfer from my city to hers, that I really enjoy. I saved money, I moved into that room, I got my own furniture and my own food and paid my own bills. I felt like I was somewhere I was actually supposed to be, and I still feel that way. I'm supposed to be here, I'm not just in whatever random city happens to be convenient.
In the morning, she comes and wakes me up before she goes to work, just to give me a kiss. I wake up every day smiling because of her. And on the days she's not out of bed by a certain time, I go down to her room and lay in bed with her. When one of us is feeling down we can just go on dates whenever we want. On the lucky days where we both have the whole day free, sometimes we spend them cuddling on a couch watching whatever show we want, other times we do our own thing, and I just go downstairs to collect a kiss or two every so often. When I got covid, she took care of me, and when she got covid, I took care of her.
2022 was a good year for me... But it's all because of her. I have depression, I let myself fall into an easy stasis, and she broke me out of it. She brought out the best in me. Fuck 2022, I do not respect the gregorian calendar. Lexi was good for me. I'm stronger and more complete because of her. I'm happier and more productive. I live my own life, free of the shame I used to feel, because she's someone I want to be worthy of. She inspires me more than I can really put into words. She's amazing, and I want to be more like her. I love her!
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*intellectualizes why all dragon dick is so weird*
it feels reductive to call my interest in furries a "fetish", even if my personal interest is primarily sexual in nature. the shit i wrote about on the flowers of robert mapplethorpe is a fetish, but being a furry is a manifestation of my autistic sexuality. It's less that I'm turned on when people are like animals, but animal physiology & mannerisms, cartoon heightening of expressions and body language, unique textures, that's just a landscape in which my brain has an easier time doing most things, including being horny.
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do you enjoy bugs
When I was five years old, a bugkeeper paid a visit to my montessori school. I remember sitting in a circle with all the other kids as various specimens were passed around one by one, I’d never seen insects the size of these, I watched with rapturous curiosity as a stickbug stretched its spindly legs over both my palms, it looked even bigger up close. But with this fascination came a profound revulsion that never quite went away as I grew older.
I was haunted by the grotesque visage of the stickbug, the gnarled expanse of its exoskeleton, the impersonable eyes perched upon its tiny head. I remain haunted further still by its eminent fragility, in none of my years have I been able to picture the stickbug in my mind’s eye without envisioning his body snapped and smashed between my fingers, popped like a dewy blade of aloe vera. As it goes, the same abject disgust crawls inside me to this day, foreign visions of torn and mangled insect parts flash before my eyes involuntarily, images that never come to pass, but still remain as real as any memory would.
But now, I stretch my body flat, my nose passing over the grass. I let out a sneeze and blink twice before bolting across the open clearing. I could smell any insect from miles away, but instead of running from them I find myself drawn closer, my young curiosity for these tiny miracles that crawl out of our sight comes to bloom within me again.
I happen upon the stickbug. Somehow, I know it’s the same one. He stretches his spindly legs over both my paws, and I know he is safe, as am I.
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