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My favourite thing about the D&D movie is it never stops trying to be a D&D movie even down to the most minute, unsung details. There's initiative order gags (I'll go last!) there's rolling a 1 gags (setting off the trap on the bridge by inexplicably just walking up to it) there's stat gags (nobody had high enough Intelligence to be in danger from the Intellect Devourers). Almost every spell is identifiable, from Xenk using smite to Sofina whipping out Finger of Death. Simon's character arc is about his self-confidence being tied to his mastery of magic because Charisma is the spellcasting stat for sorcerers. The era of movies based on games being afraid of their source material is over.

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Favorite genre of picture, snakes wrapped around bird beaks.

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Diet culture is hilarious and rad actually

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feeling called out today

credit: _ADWills

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never ask a woman her age a man his salary your mutual how late it is in her timezone when she starts posting about that bisexual man

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I wish we had more female characters like Eleanor Shellstrop. One of the most unlikable people you've ever met. Read a Buzzfeed article on most rude things you can do on a daily basis and decided to use that as a list of goals. Makes everyone's day worse just by being there. Dropped a margarita mix on the ground and tried to pick it up, only to get hit by a row of shopping carts which pushed her into the road where she was hit by a boner pill delivery truck, killing her instantly. Cannot keep a romantic partner despite being bisexual. Had a terrible childhood but will die before she gets therapy. Best employee at a scam company. Just the worst but also can't help but root for her to improve.

Absolute loser. Girl-failure. Bad at almost everything. Literally perfect female character.

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theres a reason lots of kids develop gender dysphoria around 10-14 and its not because its a social contagion but its because puberty is really fucking distressing when you’re trans, and thats when it becomes too much to handle.

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Oh come on lady, you can't deny a man his gaycation

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they mean 'sick' in the sk8er boi way (as in, SICK moves bro)

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WISDOM UPDATE

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im reading about cowboy phrases and sayings and like 95% of them are just solid life advice

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#NEVERFINDHIM