wisperingwarden

[wisperingwarden]

"tumblr humor is only funny to tumblr users" NOT true. those bitches on pinterest love us.

[wisperingwarden]

things you DO NOT need to be a man

a dick

he/him pronouns

XY chromosomes

things you DO need to be a man

the swiftness of a coursing river

the force of a great typhoon

the strength of a raging fire

the mysteriousness of the dark side of the moon

^this post was brought to you by LGBT^

Let's

Get down to

Business

To defeat the huns

[wisperingwarden]

I wanna be someones dog

But like

In an unhealthy way

[wisperingwarden]

[wisperingwarden]

Being physically a human:

Pros:

I can eat chocolate, avocados, ect.

I can enjoy music (most animals just sense the human music as regular noise)

I can draw

I have opposable thumbs, very useful

I can read

Cons:

I have to live in human society, which is the opposite of nice

Sometimes I feel stuck in this body

Always feeling like I don't fit with the others / that they hate me

Back pain (and I'm a literal kid still)

Almost everything else

[wisperingwarden]

im gods weakest faggot

[wisperingwarden]

character misses their shot and the villain goes "ha! you missed." and the main character goes "did i?" and then shoots the villain again while they're frantically looking around the room for what the hero could possibly have aiming for instead

[wisperingwarden]

Pour syrup in my wounds i am your pancake

[wisperingwarden]

[wisperingwarden]

people really be saying shit like "i wanna do cocaine :/"

lemme see here. just a little to take the edge off. *steps outside into the beautiful wilderness* *takes deep breath* oh yeah. thats the stuff.

i immediately pass out on the floor due to allergies

[wisperingwarden]

My first time doing lasso art :]

[wisperingwarden]

reblog if people r allowed to send u asks as if theyre ur friend. wanna tell me how ur day went? do it!!! ask me for advice? sure! ask a personal question? go right on ahead!

[wisperingwarden]

asking "hey is it fine if I smoke in here" and before you're able to answer I've already set up a full rack of salmon over a fire in your living room

[wisperingwarden]

[wisperingwarden]

whiiiine where're my waggy tail and my floppy little ears and my bappy little paws and my little doggy fangs :( whiiiiiine

[wisperingwarden]

[wisperingwarden]

my school?? is lowkey so based?? we don't have any bathrooms with stalls, they're all single rooms, and they're all genderless?? and theres a sing?? that says 'all single bathrooms, all genders'??? and all the bathrooms are single bathrooms?? and we're going to learn?? about gender and sexuality in health class???? wtf????