wonknevetnod

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Tryna cleanly peel off the price sticker from your new book

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Thinking about when I worked at a shitty restaurant + one night it was just me + 3 other women on closing shift, so some guy came in the back and waved a knife around, presumably for money but I’m not actually certain, bc he was met with the bartender holding a much bigger knife, a tiny teenager wielding a cast iron pan, an elderly woman holding up a crockpot of clearly boiling water, and me, turning on the meat slicer with eye contact for maximum effect. He left, but the moral of the story is not girl power or whatever, it’s just. Why the fuck would you threaten a room full of underpaid and sleep-deprived blue-collar workers surrounded by lethal weapons.

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Be careful princess  🌸

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going online for hours at a time: depressing, bleak, I become convinced I'm fugly and poor and that nobody else has a messy room and that there is no hope for the future because we are a generation of lobotomised ipad babies

going online after being busy all day and I can't feel my feet anymore and I finally get 20 minutes to scroll tumblr: beautiful digital realm full of laughs jokes and funny beautiful women from all over the world let me live forever in the computer world idgaf

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Brooch with hand forged fine silver lily of the valey flowers on a sterling stem. The leaf is a polished and sealed circuit board inlaid with opals.

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girl who wont shut up about how she "loves a man in uniform" but as she keeps talking it becomes clear she's talking about butches in customer service jobs

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You know how people sometimes get a cat by just having a random stray cat with no collar and no chip walk in and sit on the couch like "yo fucknuts I live here now", and the people just go "well fuck, guess I gotta go get a litterbox then."

Now consider: Humans doing that to the fae. Not being captured by the fae folk, not taken against their will but stubbornly walking in to their realm and refusing to leave before one of them agrees to take this damn creature. Faeries telling each other "naww come on, you can't make it leave, it already ate your food. Everyone knows you gotta keep them if you've fed them."

And another faery yells back "I did not fucking feed that thing, it climbed into my pantry and was eating flour straight out of the bag!"

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Treat yourself to what now??

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publishing companies will be like ~ooh this is a hardcover oooh it's so durable that will be $35~ and then you see the actual book and it's like. "perfect"-bound with endbands glued on crooked and a completely plain paper cover under the dust jacket. my dudes this shit is a mass market paperback with delusions of grandeur