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Hi! I'm not technically back from the dead. I don't think. But I was made aware by the lovely @furekami that I never posted my contributions to the ORV scenario zine! There's another one somewhere around here. I'll find it. In the mean time, please enjoy.

I was just listening to "Two" by Sleeping at Last and it brought back all of my very emotional feelings about ORV that I thought was dormant for two years. God I love this story so much.

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...( ＿ ＿)ノ｜

How will I face Monday (that is, tomorrow)

...and probably ignoring everything while I'm writing or reading fics. That's my coping method.

I don't want to go to the U tomorrow…

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My 6-page comic for the "Our Vow of Death" ChoiCale Wedding Zine!!!! 🥹🫶🖤❤️ (@/chchzine)

Thank you again to all the organizers behind OVOD, and of course to all my fellow artist/writer contributors, as well — everyone worked so hard and the final result is so so so amazing 🥹 Being able to physically hold the fruits of all our love and effort made me jump to the moon!!

Happy CHCH Wedding, and thank you again for having me!!!!!! I hope everyone's zine deliveries arrive safely into your arms, too!!! 😭🫶🖤❤️🖤❤️

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Still making my way down the top 10 as their episodes end ✍️ Here’s Lucky Cyan's edition! The episodes felt a bit quickly paced but I really enjoyed her story and the origins of how she got her powers.

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The first generation of black and white doomed yaoi:

The Chinese branch:

Link Click: Cheng Xiaoshi x Lu Guang - ShiGuang

The Japanese branch:

Jujutsu Kaisen: Gojo Satoru x Geto Suguru - SatoSugu

The Korean branch:

Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint: Yoo Joonghyuk x Kim Dokja - JoongDok

The second generation of black and white doomed yaoi:

The Chinese branch:

To Be Hero X: Wreck x Nice - Wrice

The Japanese branch:

The Summer Hikaru Died: Tsujinaka Yoshiki x 'Hikaru' - YoshiKaru

The Korean branch:

Alien Stage: Ivan x Till - IvanTill

@blackwhiteanddoomed

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the popular couple and their secret dark haired bfs

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Yes I am 100% sane after to be hero x episode 2 why do you ask- WHY IS IT ALWYAS THE WHITE AND BLACK HAIRED DUO

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My brain still thinking on these two <3 The dynamic is just such an interesting one to think about! ^^

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what could have been

———

Day 61, 62, 63

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"tragedies: the love was there"

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I'm still not over the new Mizi comic so I'm ranting again.

The main part that I wanna focus on is the MiziSua slap

Tbh, I always thought that they both hid their true self from each other (Well, I guess I'm only referring to Sua because I genuinely thought that Mizi was as carefree and jolly as shown and only thought that it was Sua hiding her true self eg her "bad" traits, like how she can be with others, since it's shown she acts drastically different with Mizi) so I was surprised that we can see that they are actually showing their "bad" selves or traits to eachother, with Sua being self-deprecating and depressing (which for me, I thought she wouldn't show this side of her to Mizi) and Mizi slapping Sua because of Sua invalidating Mizi in a way which triggered the slap.

There is also a scene where I was surprised, it was when Sua responded with "I'm not sure if I can say the same" when Mizi said that she's just happy because Sua is now with her.

Like, I thought that after being objectified and pushed around by Nigeh, she'd be relieved and reciprocate Mizi's happiness in finally being able to see each other again, but she responded with that? Why is that really? Why does she say she doesn't feel the same as Mizi; being happy because they're with each other? Am I looking too much into this moment? It just felt really out of character for Sua (who loves Mizi in the whole wide world, and Mizi reciprocating those feelings)

Anyways, there is like an interpretation that Sua purposely provoked Mizi, and I agree with that because I'm pretty sure Sua would know how hurtful those words are, especially after Mizi just told Sua her shitty experience with that creep and yet still said those? I'm really curious as to what she was thinking. Because, like, canonically, Sua is much more beautiful than Mizi (based on the stats which might be from a biased view from the aliens cuz beauty isn't objective) so if there's a woman who could understand Mizi the most, it should be Sua. Sua literally has been objectified and dehumanized all her life by Nigeh, and it won't be a surprise if she faced some sexism and mysogyny too, and yet she spouts those words to Mizi? That it "must be nice, right?" Even after Mizi told her about the encounter? Even after seeing the bruise on her face?

When I keep thinking about it, it just really seems so tone deaf and out of place for Sua of all people to say that, she knows what it's like to just be reduced to her appearance, she must know how invalidating and hurtful the words she uttered to the one she loves the most must be. So just why? Personally, I think it might be either of the two things, it's either sua was just not really in her right mind at that moment, with the upcoming Alien Stage tournament and the pressure of knowing that one of them is dying, and her owner pushing her around, she might've been not considering Mizi's feelings atm even if she knows the weight of her words, Orr it's really just Sua trying to let mizi drop the mask around her which I'll explain more.

We can see Sua smiling after getting slapped, I saw a post interpreting that as sua happy because Mizi is dropping the mask around her, that she got the results she wanted. Sua then replies with a simple "it's fine" after Mizi starts crying and apologizing, Sua doesn't lash out, or is even surprised/upset, this could also be interpreted as Sua being so dependent and enamored with Mizi that she literally doesn't care if Mizi hurts her, though I want to believe that it's the latter; Sua intentionally parroting the boys' words to Mizi in hopes that it triggers her and drop her facade. Maybe Sua didn't intend on Mizi actually hitting her as a result, reflected in her expression when Mizi hit her, but she's still smiling, and isn't upset one bit because at least Mizi is dropping the mask, the mask that is basically sewn to her face, even after being assaulted, she still smiles, even after the love of her life, who she finds comfort in the most minimizes her pain causing her to slap her, she still smiles, the mask is so engraved in her that even after hurting the one she loves, she still shows her smiling self even while tears start to well. Only after realizing what she's done, she starts immediately regretting her actions and starts crying in front of Sua, she's dropping the mask in front of Sua, a mask she's never let anyone see past, she's baring it all to Sua at this moment. Which from what I said earlier, might actually be what Sua intended. Finally, Mizi who is acting fine after being literally degraded and assaulted is letting it all out. Even if Sua gets hurt in the process.

Tbh, to me, this really just shows you how much Sua cares and loves Mizi, even when Sua is tired and sick of her situation with Nigeh, she puts Mizi first, with her trying to let her actually express her feelings instead of bottling it. -Assuming that my interpretation is even close to true.

Even if Sua copes through Mizi's innocence and brightness, I don't think she wants it at the expense of Mizi always hiding behind a facade, always smiling and bottling it up even after terrible things happen to her. Even when she feeds off of her innocence, Sua's love isn't something that shallow, she still loves Mizi even after knowing that Mizi isn't all sunshine and rainbows.

So both of them DO know the other parts of the other which I thought they were hiding from one another, idk it kinda makes me feel better because even though the other has a side that is way different from their idolized self; we can see this with Mizi always calling Sua perfect and literally calling her her God and Universe, and Sua having Mizis 'innocence' as a coping mechanism and literally only has Mizi as her only reason to live. Presumably. That they still stick to each other and love each other the same, because even if their relationship is immensely toxic and codependent, that doesn't mean that the love isn't real or genuine even if they both may harbor some form of resentment for the other, this just makes their relationship SO much more complex, and nuanced.

This comic really fleshes out Mizi and Sua's relationship, and shows the people who think it is healthy or nontoxic that the relationship really isn't, none of it is. Mizi even said that they previously had an argument and now I'm really curious what it might've been about.🤌

Edit: I added more of my thoughts bc I still keep thinking about it. (Primarily just the part of why sua said what she said even when she knows what it's like to be objectified and more stuff about mizi) this is just my interpretation of the scene so ofc I may not be right. And also i have a hard time articulating my thoughts and putting them into words so this analysis might be all over the place and just missing the point completely.

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moon?

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Fire 🔥

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ShangXiaCheng, my beloveds 💕💕💕

Genuinely insane over these three and the more time goes on the more guns they point at me and I can't escape. I loved how nothing ever happened to them and they got to be happy and married and adopted a cat. Li Haoling is such a merciful writer <3

Happy fucking pride month Yang Cheng

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Me: I hope there's Sherliam this chapter for Pride Month

Sherlock, twisting his ring around on his left ring finger: I have a romantic partner

Me: What

Sherlock: And my name is Mr. Scott

Fred: Your name is what

Me: OH THIS IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN I WAS EXPECTING

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Klein Moretti: The Original Sherliam Shipper

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I'm having a breakdown right now!!! Want to scream o(*≧▽≦)ツ┏━┓

is it too soon to say sherliam canon cuz JUST LOOK AT THIS

MARRIED GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL

DURING PRIDE MONTH

MR SHERLOC SCOTT HOLMES YOU HOMOSEXUAL