yoottoboot

[yoottoboot]

why do u guys think intrusive thoughts are shit like “hnnhnnnng Ball” its literally like. unwanted thoughts about poisoning dinner guests or killing your children or incest like its not some Fun Haha Relatable Mental Illness feel! its vey stressful and theyre almost impossible to get rid of

[yoottoboot]

Went to therapy. All my fears were assuaged. I did nothing wrong. And I finally believe that now.

Tumblr needs to do some reading on what intrusive thoughts are and what they truly mean.

It's not the thought that matters. It's how you react. I react to every racist intrusive thought as horrified, and correct my brain.

I want to thank my therapist for assuring my innocence in the matter. I was much too hard on myself.

No one is in the wrong on this matter but my intrusive thoughts and the people who don't understand them.

[yoottoboot]

you shouldnt need to post about your racist thoughts online in front of your friends of color in order to come to terms with it, write it in a journal, talk to your therapist, feeling like in order to come to terms with a horrible part of your mental illness you need to put it on tumblr is a huge problem, there are other ways to come to terms with your issues besides letting people of color know you think about calling them slurs

I don't fucking think about calling my friends slurs.

the last instance of my intrusive thoughts was long ago. it was a stranger. I didn't call her a slur, and I chastised my brain for having that thought.

I've never thought about calling Lyall a slur. I don't fucking have the urge to call someone the n word every time I see a black person.

these instances are random. I can't control when they happen. they haven't happened in a while, either.

I deserve to not have to keep secrets about my mental health.

[yoottoboot]

last post for tonight but I go to therapy tomorrow and I will talk about this. And my therapist will correct me and advise me of my next actions and we will also talk about my intrusive thoughts.

[yoottoboot]

Okay, yep, said a bad thing. Calling people slurs is violent. Sorry about that. I was only thinking about the physical when there's more than physical violence.

I didn't know so many people would message Lyall about me. My friend Alexis sent me Lyall's reply and I understand it.

Yes, I was open about my racist intrusive thoughts. Yes, I am a white person, and privileged over people of color.

I understand Lyall's disturbance over me mentioning that these thoughts are also detrimental to me. Well, they are. That's why they're called "intrusive". I don't want them there. And I am in therapy for a multitude of reasons, including stopping these thoughts.

I want to clarify that these thoughts are not violent. The worst thoughts I get are to call a person of color a slur. Of course, I would never do this. I know better. And of course, this doesn't make the thought any less bad.

I personally think I shouldn't be cancelled for talking about my mental illness. And I'm not "blaming my racism on my mental illness".

I got the answer I needed, and I really don't wanna talk about this anymore, at least for today.

I understand why a person of color would be disturbed by this. And I want to say I'm sorry. At the moment, I can't control what my brain tells me.

But I'm working on it.

[yoottoboot]

You have control over being public about your harmful intrusive thought

I do have control over this. I personally think I shouldn't have to hide this part of my mental illness. Being open about what I struggle with (and I do struggle with it, along with it hurting people of color) helps me come to terms with it (not accepting it, as that would mean being okay with it) while being in therapy to see if I can make it stop.

[yoottoboot]

intrusive thoughts don't make your racist. intrusive thoughts is a part of OCD and something people don't have control of. I'm sorry people don't understand that and are rude.

Thanks, but I still think it's important to apologize to a person of color and any other people of color disturbed by my thoughts.

[yoottoboot]

I didn't know so many people would message Lyall about me. My friend Alexis sent me Lyall's reply and I understand it.

Yes, I was open about my racist intrusive thoughts. Yes, I am a white person, and privileged over people of color.

I understand Lyall's disturbance over me mentioning that these thoughts are also detrimental to me. Well, they are. That's why they're called "intrusive". I don't want them there. And I am in therapy for a multitude of reasons, including stopping these thoughts.

I want to clarify that these thoughts are not violent. The worst thoughts I get are to call a person of color a slur. Of course, I would never do this. I know better. And of course, this doesn't make the thought any less bad.

I personally think I shouldn't be cancelled for talking about my mental illness. And I'm not "blaming my racism on my mental illness".

I got the answer I needed, and I really don't wanna talk about this anymore, at least for today.

I understand why a person of color would be disturbed by this. And I want to say I'm sorry. At the moment, I can't control what my brain tells me.

But I'm working on it.

[yoottoboot]

congrats on outing yourself as a racist and trying to excuse it by saying its your mental illnesses fault

are you fucking serious. you realize that a lot of people with intrusive thoughts have racist thoughts? its because I was raised by racists. racism is in me, yes. but I'm working against it. I'm making an effort. talking about my mental illness is not "outing me as racist".

[yoottoboot]

conversion therapy: *abuses, tortures, and kills the lgbt*

some chucklehead on tumblr: “your joke post saying ‘why be straight’ is the same thing as conversion therapy”

[yoottoboot]

for reference, this is what david tennant’s nose looks like. he has a straight roman nose that squishes up a little when he smiles widely. he has no distinctive hook or nose bump. the tip of his nose, notably, does not curve down beneath his nostrils. he and michael sheen have similarly sized and shaped noses, except that michael’s turns up at the end where david’s turns slightly down.

if you find yourself drawing crowley where it resembles the nose on the right here,

take a step back and rethink your drawing. think about the stereotypes and tropes you are upholding, and why you’re choosing to make a hooked nose prominent on a demon.

(goyim feel free to reblog, but don’t be clowns)

[yoottoboot]

Flying and fairy type rapidash?

<3

[yoottoboot]

men who write women be like

[yoottoboot]

fruitpunchfinn ➡️ rowanbabey

[yoottoboot]

IM ROWAN, BABEY

[yoottoboot]

These are the solutions we need to policing right now. Remember: the problem cannot be solved by technocratic solutions (i.e. body cams, further trainings, etc.) The problem is policing itself.