yourcoldcocoa

[yourcoldcocoa]

psychoanalyzing the gender/identity dichotomy between ice skating and ice hockey and coming to the more objectively correct conclusion that ice hockey is rooted in motherly feminine behavior of protecting the nest and that ice skating is about masculine peacocking of one's own physical prowess in seeking a mate

[yourcoldcocoa]

Tbh I think fandom generally needs to get better at sitting with the uncomfortable fact that a story/fanwork/meme/whatever can hurt one person and help another

[yourcoldcocoa]

Went to take this picture of this insane bigfoot sex sign and only after opening my camera did i notice the entire flock of little chickens chilling in the dirt. life is good again

[yourcoldcocoa]

[yourcoldcocoa]

Was scrolling through AO3 and found this gem

Enemy to parent is a trope we have to popularise lmao

[yourcoldcocoa]

popular "average monkey learns one new thing a day" statistic incorrect. Curious Georg,

[yourcoldcocoa]

wearing a vintage 60s babydoll for fun | iridessence

[yourcoldcocoa]

🏳️‍🌈 Join the Monterey Bay Aquarium as we sea-lebrate Pride! 🏳️‍⚧️

Our staff and volunteers gathered in early June to raise the Progress Pride flag in front of the Aquarium. We’ll continue the fun and education with a spot in the Monterey Pride Parade and tabling at the festival on Saturday, June 28! Swim on over to our website for more details.

We envision a future where the ocean flourishes and people thrive in a just and equitable world. To find lasting solutions in support of environmental justice, we need and value diverse perspectives and voices. 

Everything you love can thrive if we work together, and the ocean needs all of us in all our brilliant colors to protect it! 🌈

[yourcoldcocoa]

some alternative eras of lady normalgirl and her eunuch <3

[yourcoldcocoa]

Top 10 Funniest Deaths of the Silmarillion

Because sometimes you have to laugh through the tears when you’re reading this book. Did reading about (most) of these deaths emotionally devastate me? Oh yeah. Doesn’t mean we can’t have a laugh about it.

10 - Maglor: didn’t fucking die, the coward! Like, given that Elves can die of depression, there’s realistically no way he lived past the Second Age, but we never get confirmation. Schrodinger’s Elf, if you will.

9 - Turgon: specifically in a fandom context it’s funny bc fanon Turgon is the boring as cardboard member of his entire generation and then he goes out refusing to leave his falling city and stands atop his tower as dragons bring it down in crumbling flames whilst yelling “great is the victory of the Noldor!” Cannot stress enough that he did not need to do this. He could have left and said no. Dumb as hell but I respect it.

8 - Argon: pour one out for my boy his death and whole existence didn’t even make it to the published Silm. Not to mention he survives the entire crossing of the Helcaraxë while his sister in law literally got friged, then dies like .5 seconds after setting foot in Beleriand. Tfw you’re so impetuous that you hew your way through the orcs without stopping to think that this means they can close ranks and surround you. Not his fault, he’d never fought before. Probably.

7 - Nienor: learns that she did a sibling incest and immediately yeets herself off a cliff. Like I can’t blame her but there’s a morbid humour in how fast she made that decision.

6 - Túrin: same as his sister, but his cursed sword suddenly reveals itself to be capable of speech, calls him out for killing his boyfriend, and then calls him a lil bitch before he kills himself with it. Also with the way his life was going this wasn’t even surprising.

5 - Sauron (death no. 3): you know he lived and died the same way: not knowing what the fuck a Hobbit is or why he should worry about them. Also this bitch dies three goddamn times because he can’t learn his damn lesson.

4 - Fëanor: Fingolfin got the death that Fëanor was destined for bc Morgoth didn’t have time to plan ahead for that fight and granted Fingolfin a badass last stand; with Fëanor he went “I’m not fighting that guy” like a lil bitch and straight up sent out a fuckton of Balrogs to fight him instead, and Fëanor survived this for long enough to curse him out again, make his sons re-swear the oath that would ruin their lives and countless others’, and then spontaneously combust out of sheer Big Mad. Other Elves have faded away from depression because the weariness and sorrow of their souls overcame their bodies; Fëanor literally invented a new way to die. Post cancelled I’ve circled back around to being impressed.

3 - Thingol: Stiffs the Dwarves on their payment and starts hurling insults and slurs at them while holding a necklace that was recently liberated from a dead dragon’s hoard that had been inset with a twice-stolen gem that lowkey curses everyone who covets it after his magic goddess wife told him that coveting it was a bad idea. Like, my guy, wtf did you think would happen.

2 - Sauron (death no. 1): the biggest L of his career. Just sitting in his temple in Atlantis Númenor, laughing maniacally, assured of his own victory, and not looking out the window behind him to see the massive wave that is approaching at mach fuck. Dies and jrrt specifically mentions that he’s never again able to have a body that men (specifically) find hot. This is more pathetic than the #1 spot but I want him to stay losing 😌

1 - Finrod: do I even need to say it? You’ve got this classy, friendly, noble Elven lord who, in short order: agrees to help a Man complete a suicide quest because he Swore An Oath, dressed up as an orc, said his name was Dungalef and his friend here was Nereb, lost a rap battle to a god bc the god brought up his ptsd triggers, got stripped naked, slipped his chains and fought a werewolf, naked, with his teeth, and won before dying of blood loss, but not before he gave a little lore drop to Beren about how Elven deaths work as his last words. The absolute legend.

Put your favorites and/or other nominations in the tags, I want to see if there's anyone I missed.

[yourcoldcocoa]

This June 27, 2025, Cookie wishes you a happy Canadian Multiculturalism Day!

[yourcoldcocoa]

an ao3 interaction

[yourcoldcocoa]

[yourcoldcocoa]

Psych was correct. When you're 100% sure of your conclusion, but it's based off of evidence that only you can see (because it's obscure, easily dismissed, or requires a lot of prior context), it's genuinely better to just say "I had a psychic vision" or something like that. People are more willing to believe you have mystical powers than that they just missed something you found obvious.

[yourcoldcocoa]

[yourcoldcocoa]

hey um. so sorry to tell you this, but op of that post plays toys kinda weird. yeah you should just block them, that's not how normal people play with toys

[yourcoldcocoa]