z-nogyrop

[z-nogyrop]

EMBRACE PROFOUND PLATONIC DEVOTION

[z-nogyrop]

one of my favorite moments of my mom is when i made her play undertale in 2021 on the switch and when she fought mettaton for the essay question “what do you like most about mettaton” she (agonizingly slow with the on screen keyboard) typed out “his sparkling wit”

[z-nogyrop]

[z-nogyrop]

Once the friend of a friend of my mom's was visiting Rio and she saw Sugarloaf Mountain and she wanted to impress her taxi driver with her knowledge of Portuguese, so she said in Portuguese "Look, Sugarloaf [Mountain]! It's very big!".

Unfortunately, English native speakers have a hard time making the "ão" sound correctly since the sound doesn't exist in English, so instead of saying "pão de açúcar" (literally, bread of sugar), she said "pau de açúcar." Now, "pau" technically just means "wood," but it's also, unfortunately for her, slang for "penis."

So to the driver what he heard was "Look at the sugar dick! it's so big!" and he almost crashed the car from laughing so hard.

[z-nogyrop]

[z-nogyrop]

sexyback is a good song but the idea of justin timberlake being sexual disgusts me I don't even register him as a human being let alone a person or a man he's more akin to an old blind dog who pisses everywhere

[z-nogyrop]

Thank you, Snoop Logg...

[z-nogyrop]

[z-nogyrop]

[z-nogyrop]

happy make-a-terrible-comic day!

[z-nogyrop]

This is who is leading the NYC mayoral democratic primary rn

[z-nogyrop]

* (Oh, these parentheses I keep opening?

* (I'm collecting them.

* (Right now, I'm 1,762 parentheses deep.

* (Oh, my precious parentheses... (I don't ever want to close them!

[z-nogyrop]

every morning I wake up and my boner is facing true north

[z-nogyrop]

observation: among a certain subset of tumblr users, the term “blorbo” has become unchic, but the concept it describes is still important; and so it has been replaced with “The Character”

[z-nogyrop]

hmm

dragonflies. haunting implications:

[z-nogyrop]

Mammoth Gordon Ramsay: Oh, fuck me, you've just thrown a spear into my side. And another! This is fucking ridiculous. Hurts all the more knowing you're going to overcook me too

[z-nogyrop]

Being the only bi cis guy amongst almost exclusively trans friends and peers is wild because in theory its like im living in a horny manga where all of a dudes friends turn into hot babes, but in reality they are hunting me like the last bison on the prairie. 5 years ago I mentioned bionicle and one of them asked when I was starting estrogen.