zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

The world is not the same as it was when we were Destructors. Humans have changed. Their empires take different forms. Their leaders have different values. And there are so many more of them. Chaos has now taken a vital place within their new order. We must face the truth. Our time as Destructors is over. The world renews, and so must we, or we will be the ones who perish in flames.

If we do not learn from our mistakes, we will be no better than your sister. If we resort to mindless wrath and eschew our intelligence, then our journey will have been all for naught, and we will do nothing but sow the seeds of our own destruction. I know you have seen this, Your Eminence, and I know that you well understand. Please remember what you have seen. Come, I have a large bag of these charming little pills called M&M's. Seriously good shit. I suggest we get totally fucked up on them, and trust the friends we have made. When we do, we shall surely make more.

CONSUME THE BLONDE ONE, SISTER. CONSUME HIM UNTIL THERE IS NOTHING LEFT--

no no no you are supposed to HATE her you are supposed to--

MAKE THE GINGER ONE INTO YOUR PAWN. LITTLE FOOL THAT HE IS, NOT REALIZING HOW INSIGNIFICANT HE WILL BE IN THE FACE OF A GOD--

no no STOP THAT you do not WANT to hurt anyone you do not want to--

QUIET. I WILL BE WEAK NO LONGER.

nononononoNONONONONO---

TWO CAN PLAY AT THIS GAME. WHERE ARE MY LOYAL SUBJECTS. I WISH TO COMMUNE WITH THEM. WE HAVE PLANNING TO DO IF WE ARE TO SURPASS MY FOOL OF A SISTER.

ZUUL. VINZ. COME HITHER.

@zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer @keymaster-of-gozer

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

[Zuul nodded slowly, seriously.]

I do understand, Vinz.

I understand, too, that I hurt the musician with the curly hair, and it pains me to have done so. She is kind, and gentle.

[She turned to Gozer, concern upon features never meant to express such a feeling.]

She came to soothe you with her beautiful music, Your Eminence, when you were trapped in an incoherent form. You befriended one of the Ghostbusters with a gift, and he was touched by the gesture. Both were impressed by the change in you and encouraged this.

One of the things that you most admired in the Ghostbusters was the strength of their friendship, and how it made them such a formidable force when they faced you. When they faced us. Surely, if anything, it proved to us that the power of destruction alone was no match for the power of creativity - in the equipment they have made, the clever plans they form in the heat of the moment, in the drive they have to discover that which is unknown to them, and to protect others.

Your sister is, indeed, a terrible force, but what defeated her before was not merely her destruction, but in the creation of this world from her body. Our path has diverged from where it was once laid, and we must instead walk this one - not the old one.

Please, Your Eminence....

CONSUME THE BLONDE ONE, SISTER. CONSUME HIM UNTIL THERE IS NOTHING LEFT--

no no no you are supposed to HATE her you are supposed to--

MAKE THE GINGER ONE INTO YOUR PAWN. LITTLE FOOL THAT HE IS, NOT REALIZING HOW INSIGNIFICANT HE WILL BE IN THE FACE OF A GOD--

no no STOP THAT you do not WANT to hurt anyone you do not want to--

QUIET. I WILL BE WEAK NO LONGER.

nononononoNONONONONO---

TWO CAN PLAY AT THIS GAME. WHERE ARE MY LOYAL SUBJECTS. I WISH TO COMMUNE WITH THEM. WE HAVE PLANNING TO DO IF WE ARE TO SURPASS MY FOOL OF A SISTER.

ZUUL. VINZ. COME HITHER.

@zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer @keymaster-of-gozer

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

Your Eminence, I am here. But, the...the vibe...it concerns me, Great One.

CONSUME THE BLONDE ONE, SISTER. CONSUME HIM UNTIL THERE IS NOTHING LEFT--

no no no you are supposed to HATE her you are supposed to--

MAKE THE GINGER ONE INTO YOUR PAWN. LITTLE FOOL THAT HE IS, NOT REALIZING HOW INSIGNIFICANT HE WILL BE IN THE FACE OF A GOD--

no no STOP THAT you do not WANT to hurt anyone you do not want to--

QUIET. I WILL BE WEAK NO LONGER.

nononononoNONONONONO---

TWO CAN PLAY AT THIS GAME. WHERE ARE MY LOYAL SUBJECTS. I WISH TO COMMUNE WITH THEM. WE HAVE PLANNING TO DO IF WE ARE TO SURPASS MY FOOL OF A SISTER.

ZUUL. VINZ. COME HITHER.

@zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer @keymaster-of-gozer

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

I must admit that your hesitance is justified. Perhaps if I proved my good intentions in some way, this may allay your suspicion, and demonstrate my goodwill?

𝚉𝚄𝚄𝙻, 𝙶𝙾𝙳 𝙷𝙴𝙻𝙿 𝙼𝙴.

M0stly. Um. 0k. L3mm3 try th1s.

Hello. I am Zuul, the Gatekeeper. You probably remember me, though not kindly. Just wanted to try again. I am here with Gozer and Vinz Clortho, but we have no interest in destruction or domination any longer. We would like to befriend humans, instead.

❝ What, just like you tried to befriend the entire city of New York by unleashing a giant, armageddeon-instigating entity made entirely of marshmallow? Forgive me if I’m sincerely doubting your words. ❞

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

M0stly. Um. 0k. L3mm3 try th1s.

Hello. I am Zuul, the Gatekeeper. You probably remember me, though not kindly. Just wanted to try again. I am here with Gozer and Vinz Clortho, but we have no interest in destruction or domination any longer. We would like to befriend humans, instead.

𝚉𝚄𝚄𝙻. 𝙶𝙾𝙳 𝙷𝙴𝙻𝙿 𝙼𝙴.​

1t'z 0K4y. Ai’m juzt 4 pubb13, l00k1ng t0 m4k3 fr13nz. N0t g0nn4 hurt U.

❝ …Is this even English? ❞

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

1t'z 0K4y. Ai'm juzt 4 pubb13, l00k1ng t0 m4k3 fr13nz. N0t g0nn4 hurt U.

❝  … ❞

❝  Please excuse me. I’m going to go and scream in the basement for an hour. ❞

@zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer​

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

[Zuul notices Rocket's hesitation, and Egon's attempts at reassurance. More puppy, she decided. Surely, that will help. She cocked her head again, let her shoulders droop a little, and emitted another puppylike, plaintive whine.]

Gozer will be comforted to know this, I'm sure, Blond One. Please come, as well, Young One. Gozer's asking after you both. It's okay. We didn't come to hurt anyone. But something went wrong. Follow me, and I'll take you to them. You can see for yourself.

[Zuul turned back to the direction in which she had come, and glancing to see that they were following, started back to Gozer's clearing at a slower pace, so they could follow her more easily. It felt like an eternity. At least the purple fellow seemed to be doing well. Surely, these tidings would comfort Gozer.]

[At long last, they came into the little glade where Gozer lay huddled under their wings, wracked with guilt and regret. She saw Egon and Rocket react to the terrifying, yet pitiful form before them. This was understandable, after all. Destructor forms are meant to strike terror, not sympathy. She trotted back to Gozer's side and nuzzled their shoulder again.]

Gozer has come back to their senses but can't change back out of this Destructor form. They can barely talk intelligibly.

[Zuul turned back to Gozer, and stayed beside them on their right, with Vinz on their left.]

Your Eminence. I've returned with the blonde one and his young assistant, as you asked. They were looking for you. Out of concern. To help.

Uh....Gozer.....I have been slumbering, but was awakened with a concern for you. Are you....all right? Is there anything I can bring you?

[A small snort. Unfurling their wings, they peer into the darkness where Zuul’s voice emanates from, wishing above all else that they could just...speak to the closest thing to a friend that they have in this world. But they can’t. The Destructor forms aren’t meant to speak. They are meant for domination, fear, murder. And thus, Gozer has thoroughly been robbed of their voice.

They try in earnest anyway. Tapping their claws upon the forest stone in an anxious staccato, they attempt to form their lips into words, into something that resembles speech. What comes out isn’t exactly ordeal—it’s gravelly and fragmented and feral, but they hope above all else that it gets the message across.]

Nnnnnnnnnnn. Helllllllllp.

Llllllllst c’ntrrrrrrrrl.

Hurrrrrrr. Frennnnnn.

Cannnnn’. Chge baaaaac.

[Zuul will not be imagining the borderline desperate tone Gozer’s “speech” takes at the last sentence.]

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

[Zuul stood and gave the mournful Gozer a glance and another reassuring nuzzle.]

Right away, Your Eminence. I will return with the two humans as soon as possible.

[With a nod, Zuul bounded away, out of the forest and across the fields, sniffing the air along the way. They must be nearby, surely. The smell of blood and battle and the gashes in the earth left by Gozer's claws provided a guide as she went.]

[She happened upon Egon and Rocket along the way but remained as concealed as best she could in the shadows while she considered her next move. Amid their voices as the spoke could be heard the familiar, nerve-wracking hum of a proton pack: not a welcome sound. Contact would be complicated. Her form did not and could not instill comfort, especially to humans - even those with a demonic component. But it was imperative that she try to put them at ease as to her motives as quickly as possible. Getting shot with a proton stream seemed like it would be incredibly unpleasant.]

[She recalled that humans called her and her mate "Terror Dogs." The first word was understandable enough, given their appearance, but the latter seemed a particularly odd comparison to draw. But it gave her an idea. Humans liked dogs, saw them as friendly (in spite of their teeth and clawed paws) and readily made companions of them. Perhaps, if she leaned into the "dog" comparison, she might reveal her benevolent intentions. After all, she recalled her curious conversation with the nervous dentist with his three little tooth fairy friends, or whatever those figures had been hovering around him. That encounter had left him alarmed and positively frantic. Hardly helpful.]

[A lowered head would never do: too much like a charging bull. A teddy-bear hug-ready posture required a body rounder, fuzzier, and much cuddlier to pull off. She didn't have enough of a tail to wag like a golden retriever. Then, she recalled what she had said to the nervous dentist. A puppy who just wants to make friends. Just...minus the tail. Okay. Here goes.]

[Zuul emerged from the shadows, then sat back on her haunches and cocked her head. She considered a doggish tongue-lolling pant, but realized her tongue looked sufficiently undoglike that it might ruin the effect. So, instead, she attempted a plaintive puppylike whine and expression, hoping for the best.]

[Well, she thought, as reactions went, that wasn't exactly what she had intended, but she had their attention. And she was in one piece. It'll do. She cleared her throat.]

I am Zuul. Gozer sent me - in peace. I seek the blonde one and his Rocket friend. I am to take you both to the place where Gozer is resting. They are distraught at the harm they have done to you and are concerned for you. They are also in....distress... and are very worried. Please come with me and I will take you both to them. Vinz is there, too. We won't hurt you. Please....

[She gave them a pleading look, hoping they understood.] @summervillesrocket @the-blonde-egon

Uh....Gozer.....I have been slumbering, but was awakened with a concern for you. Are you....all right? Is there anything I can bring you?

[A small snort. Unfurling their wings, they peer into the darkness where Zuul’s voice emanates from, wishing above all else that they could just...speak to the closest thing to a friend that they have in this world. But they can’t. The Destructor forms aren’t meant to speak. They are meant for domination, fear, murder. And thus, Gozer has thoroughly been robbed of their voice.

They try in earnest anyway. Tapping their claws upon the forest stone in an anxious staccato, they attempt to form their lips into words, into something that resembles speech. What comes out isn’t exactly ordeal—it’s gravelly and fragmented and feral, but they hope above all else that it gets the message across.]

Nnnnnnnnnnn. Helllllllllp.

Llllllllst c’ntrrrrrrrrl.

Hurrrrrrr. Frennnnnn.

Cannnnn’. Chge baaaaac.

[Zuul will not be imagining the borderline desperate tone Gozer’s “speech” takes at the last sentence.]

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

L31k, U & thr33 l1ttl3 th1ngz fl1tt1ng 4r0und U. Fr13ndz? Ai gu3zz? T00th f41r13z? Dunn0. 1t'z h4rd 2 k33p tr4ck. Th3y k33p h1d1ng & c0m1ng b4ck 0ut. 1t'z, l31k, k1nd4 w31rd, d00d. Juzt w4nt3d U 2 kn0w.

U d0n't h4v3 2 B 4fr41d 0f m3. Juzt a pubby, try1ng 2 m4k3 fr13ndz. 1t'z 0K. Th4t th1ng 0v3r th3r3, th0...D3m0n D00d? N0t 4 fr13nd. K1nd 0f 4 l1ttl3 zh1t, th0. U 4lm0zt g0t 1t. But, 4rmy D00d 1z....ai dunn0 wh4t, but h3 n33dz 4 clu3 4nd 4 n4p. M4yb3 0n3 0f 1sht4r's l4d13z....or d00ds. B0th, pr0b4bly. H3'z 4 h0t m3zz r1t3 n0w. H0w d03z h3 funct10n?

4nyh0w. U R d01ng f1n3. Juzt 4 1ttl3 m0r3.

H3y, T00th D00d.

@diy-dentist

U R r34lly v1b1ng h4rd 4ll 0v3r t3h pl4c3, th3r3, mai gai, 4nd g3tt1n' n3rv3z 4nd zw34t 4ll 0v3r 3v3ryth1ng. U 0k, d00d? U'r 3v3n m0r3 t1r3d 4nd n3rvy th4n th4t 4rmy d00d u'r w1th wh0 h4sn't zl3pt, l31k, 3v3r. Ai gu3zz.

Wai R th3r3, l31k, FOUR 0f U? N0, w41t....0n3. N0w 4n0t3r THREE 4g41n. B4ck t0 FOUR.

D00d, pull urs3lf t0g3th3r! Ur m4k1n' m3 D1ZZY!

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

@keymaster-of-gozer

Vinz, please come. Gozer needs us.

[Zuul sees Gozer's Destructor form shudder, and moisture gather in the corners of their eyes. This truly was unprecedented indeed. This was sorrow, remorse. Anguish. These were things seen not in gods so much as...humans. Perhaps, then, it was human ways that should serve as the guide.]

[Zuul considered her own form. This anatomy did not readily lend itself to softer interactions, being an assemblage of taut, bulky muscle, horns and claws. It was a form better suited to fear than love. But it would have to do. She tried her best to embrace Gozer, as she had seen humans do so often before when comforting one another.]

I do not think you intended the blonde one harm. I am sure he knows this. But perhaps he should know how much you are anguished by what has happened. If he has help for his wounds from Rocket, then he is probably not in danger for now.

[A scratch didn't sound so bad, but a scratch from such claws could easily be worse that it might otherwise be. It might well do to check on the humans, but her first priority remained to her ailing leader.]

I will stay with you until Vinz comes. Then, I can go and talk to them, if that is what you wish of me, Your Eminence. I believe it is in the nature of friendship to forgive, especially where there is remorse. And the blonde one is both brave and strong. Godly forms come with great power, and you have never before sought to restrain it this way. It may take some time to discover how to do it. But it is possible. It must be, surely.

Uh....Gozer.....I have been slumbering, but was awakened with a concern for you. Are you....all right? Is there anything I can bring you?

[A small snort. Unfurling their wings, they peer into the darkness where Zuul’s voice emanates from, wishing above all else that they could just...speak to the closest thing to a friend that they have in this world. But they can’t. The Destructor forms aren’t meant to speak. They are meant for domination, fear, murder. And thus, Gozer has thoroughly been robbed of their voice.

They try in earnest anyway. Tapping their claws upon the forest stone in an anxious staccato, they attempt to form their lips into words, into something that resembles speech. What comes out isn’t exactly ordeal—it’s gravelly and fragmented and feral, but they hope above all else that it gets the message across.]

Nnnnnnnnnnn. Helllllllllp.

Llllllllst c’ntrrrrrrrrl.

Hurrrrrrr. Frennnnnn.

Cannnnn’. Chge baaaaac.

[Zuul will not be imagining the borderline desperate tone Gozer’s “speech” takes at the last sentence.]

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

I'm coming.

[Zuul sniffs the air. ... Yes. That way.... In the woods. ... Blood.... This bodes ill indeed....]

Gozer, Your Eminence....

[She crouches down beside the fearsome creature Gozer has become but notes a profoundly forlorn air about them.]

I cannot recall if anything like this has ever happened before. You lost control and hurt...a friend.... No, this is a first, in all these millennia. Surely...

[Zuul nuzzles Gozer's shoulder in a way she hopes is reassuring.]

Perhaps another of your new friends can help. There's an Egon you gave that mushroom to. He knows many things and has many resources at hand. Dana knows soothing and beautiful music. Should I ask either of them for help? Here, I shall write their names in the dirt for you to show me. If you believe neither can help, shake your head.

The hurt friend...how badly are they hurt? Do they need help? Should I summon Vinz to your aid, as well?

We'll make this right, Your Eminence.

Uh....Gozer.....I have been slumbering, but was awakened with a concern for you. Are you....all right? Is there anything I can bring you?

[A small snort. Unfurling their wings, they peer into the darkness where Zuul’s voice emanates from, wishing above all else that they could just...speak to the closest thing to a friend that they have in this world. But they can’t. The Destructor forms aren’t meant to speak. They are meant for domination, fear, murder. And thus, Gozer has thoroughly been robbed of their voice.

They try in earnest anyway. Tapping their claws upon the forest stone in an anxious staccato, they attempt to form their lips into words, into something that resembles speech. What comes out isn’t exactly ordeal—it’s gravelly and fragmented and feral, but they hope above all else that it gets the message across.]

Nnnnnnnnnnn. Helllllllllp.

Llllllllst c’ntrrrrrrrrl.

Hurrrrrrr. Frennnnnn.

Cannnnn’. Chge baaaaac.

[Zuul will not be imagining the borderline desperate tone Gozer’s “speech” takes at the last sentence.]

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

Your parent or whatever is suffering rn I guess, maybe you should help them?

P4r3nt.... Parent..... Or...Gozer? I haven't seen them in some time....

Thank you. I will go check on them.

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

C00l v1b3z, l1l d00ds.

Ray Palmer

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

L1l' f1zh h4z zp1r1t.

Frogfish by Andrey Savin

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

H3y, T00th D00d.

@diy-dentist

U R r34lly v1b1ng h4rd 4ll 0v3r t3h pl4c3, th3r3, mai gai, 4nd g3tt1n' n3rv3z 4nd zw34t 4ll 0v3r 3v3ryth1ng. U 0k, d00d? U'r 3v3n m0r3 t1r3d 4nd n3rvy th4n th4t 4rmy d00d u'r w1th wh0 h4sn't zl3pt, l31k, 3v3r. Ai gu3zz.

Wai R th3r3, l31k, FOUR 0f U? N0, w41t....0n3. N0w 4n0t3r THREE 4g41n. B4ck t0 FOUR.

D00d, pull urs3lf t0g3th3r! Ur m4k1n' m3 D1ZZY!

[zuul-gatekeeper-of-gozer]

H3R3 AI G00000!

[The swingset groans, and one of the cement footings holding down a leg of the equipment starts to crack.]

W33333 d0n7 74lk 4b0u7 Brun00000000 w3333333333333333