#☾ ` feel like i'm stuck in the wrong skin ; sam uley musings .

[sapphiredhearts-a]

lore / early life / canon divergent storylines pt 2

sam hates himself for the actions he takes after emily is admitted to the hospital & he gives his statement . the council warns him to blame a bear attack - exposure is to great a risk . he can see the pain in harry's eyes & when leah joins them at the hospital he pulls her aside . the breakup is quick & sam gives no explanations before leaving altogether .

sam leaves la push for awhile roaming mostly in his wolf form . he phases back to keep in touch with his mother but ignores any calls from the council or leah . emily eventually contacts him as well - leaving a voicemail to explain that they needed to talk . he ignores this as well .

in some timelines / plots sam & emily eventually reconnect when he comes back to la push . the council explained to her about the legends to keep her from talking & he is finally able to share with someone his secrets which is a burden lifted from him . they grow close after this - even though sam knows it is wrong to even be friends with her . sometimes this leads to a ship , other times not .

sam does not return home until he receives news that his mother is very ill . he returns home just in time to say goodbye . the death of his mother reverts him back to the guy he used to be & he spends the rest of his time restoring his childhood home as well as getting a job in construction in forks . his free time is spent to learning about himself when he is phased & learning how to control it . soon after the first wolves began to phase .

all of twilight & most of new moon sam is dedicated to helping train new wolves . they are his brothers in every sense of the word & he does not take his role lightly . he feels this is the least he can do to make amends for the wrongs he has committed & vows to never lose control again in any sense .

when jacob phases things become complicated . sam is happy to step aside as alpha for jacob to take his rightful place & does not mind becoming beta . but jacob refuses & so sam continues on . however , when bella swan comes into the picture sam becomes wary . his entire past has revolved around keeping their secret & protecting the town from vampires & now here comes a human who not only knows everything ( and because of jacob at that ) but has an alliance to the very thing he is sworn to hate . after hearing her story on what the cullen's have done he begins to care for her & see her side of things .

when the cullen's come back ( when they do - verses vary ) sam is again wary of bella . she seems to welcome them back at first & he hates the idea of them being so near . he does allow his prejudice to wane a little when she explains to them that they do not feed on humans ( despite the treaty saying it - sam was unsure ) and this allows him to be more open when they need to fight the newborns in eclipse .

I do not follow breaking dawn at all . Please refer to my Bella Swan headcanons for different events that occurred with the cullen family . The volturi do not engage with the wolves at all in my canon .

[sapphiredhearts-a]

lore / early life / canon divergent storylines

you can find the werewolf lore at the top of this jacob headcanon post .

early life

joshua & allison uley had a tumultuous relationship which started when they were in high school . both were from low income families but allison's was more respected in the community . however , as soon as she began dating joshua her family tried their best to separate them - lamenting their frequent explosive arguments & praising her when they'd break up . . . only for them to be back together again the next day . when allison showed up pregnant her senior year her family distanced themselves completely & told her to leave their home immediately .

joshua , for his part , really did try to straighten up at the announcement of his firstborn . he was over the moon when he learned they were having a son & often talked about the things he would teach him and what they would do together . but soon his playboy ways came back to him & he was often out late with other women or drinking & gambling away what little money they had . when he'd come home the couple would argue loudly & even came to blows a few times . still , allison adored joshua & knew she would never leave him . eventually - joshua was the one to leave . family life was too much & he skipped town with his new girlfriend .

allison was devastated to be a single mom to her son , sam . so for his part the young boy often took on the responsibilities of the adult in the house . he took care of his mom & the bills & food wanting more than anything to have a normal family & household . this caused him to mature quickly & he often had a hard time making friends because he did not find the same hobbies interesting . it was hard to care about stupid ( in his opinion ) events & other things when he had to help keep the lights on . sam often took on small part-time jobs before he was old enough to work & grew well-respected in the community of la push . everyone thought he was a lot more mature & responsible than his parents & began to trust him .

one of sam's weekend jobs started at the clearwater house . harry needed yardwork done & some things around the house repaired & had heard that sam could do practically anything . the job would take a few months and was good pay so sam eagerly accepted . it was here that he got to know leah clearwater .

sam knew of leah from school , of course . she was a grade younger than him but vibrant & popular . she was always out with a different crowd of kids & seemed to be quite the troublemaker . she was irresponsible yet bubbly & although sam tended to stray from those type of kids - something about leah drew him in . it helped that she was one of the most beautiful women he had ever seen in his life .

soon , sam found himself lingering at the clearwater's home - making excuses so he could see leah or talk to her . at first , she brushed him off . she thought he was too responsible & thought he was better than everyone . some of the other kids said he was creepy because he never spoke to anyone . yet over time she started to like him & the two became friends quickly once she opened up . his last day at the job - sam went and asked harry permission to ask leah on a date . harry laughed and said good luck but gave his blessing . when leah found out she immediately turned sam down .

sam kept his distance after that - stung from the rejection . almost a month later , leah cornered him in the hallway demanding to know why he hadn't tried again . he was confused - had she wanted him to ? and she laughed & told him he had a lot to learn . before she walked away she told him to pick her up at 8 that friday . it was barely a week before they were a couple & sam's life changed drastically .

if sam was rain , leah was a hurricane . she was everything he had stayed away from & yet he found he couldn't get enough . he drank alcohol for the first time with her , tried his first drugs with her , and soon was staying out late & coming exhausted to jobs around town because he was spending every moment he could with her . and yet despite how he had changed - sam adored every second . he was in love with leah & he loved how free he could be with her . he could act his age . suddenly his parents recklessness all made perfect sense .

sam had no doubts that he would ask leah to marry him when they both had graduated high school . he was saving up that summer to buy her a ring when his transformation happened . he had heard the legends from his mother's father growing up but he hadn't believed them & being the first of his kind he thought he had gone crazy . he spent three weeks in the woods trying to figure out how to phase back .

when he finally calmed down enough to phase back he was stunned to realize his mom hadn't noticed his absence . she still lived with him but thought he had found a job somewhere and didn't question any of it . leah , however , was nothing but questions . they had argued in the past but the arguments now grew more heated than ever . he couldn't answer her questions - he wasn't exactly sure what the hell was going on himself - and she wasn't satisfied . she was sure he was lying - perhaps cheating & after two weeks of going back & forth she ended things with him .

sam was heartbroken but the next week of their break up was clarifying for him . during it he ran into old quil ateara who happened to shake his hand . although at first he thought sam must be ill , he ended up realizing that evening what was going on as he put together the disappearance & the sudden change in temperature . he called a tribal council meeting & they approached sam at work the next day . he was shocked but couldn't help but believe them - as well as be happy that he had assistance now . however , they urged him not to tell his secret & his hope faded . he couldn't tell leah .

despite not being able to tell her anything , sam couldn't stay away . he begged for her back & she eventually relented . he told her there were secrets he could not share but he promised to be around & as honest as he could . they struggled but they geniunely loved each other & wanted to try to make it work . sam hid the engagement ring until he could figure out how to make things more stable .

when emily young came to town , sam didn't think much of her . she seemed to judge him immensely and said scathing comments towards him more than once about the way he seemingly treated leah . it didn't help that the people around town noticed his behavior & began to whisper that he was becoming more & more like his father joshua . emily was as responsible & mature as sam used to be once upon a time & he found that he resented her for it - and for the truth in her words about leah . he knew that he needed to give leah up but he was selfishly holding on to whatever normalcy he had left .

sam eventually decides to confront emily - against the advice of harry who by now knew exactly what was going on with sam ( he didn't really approve of him being with leah but he knew better than to interfere with leah's decisions & knew that sam could not control phasing ) . he catches her one day at the beach alone near a secluded area . he knows it is not the brightest idea but he tries to explain to her that there is more to the story than she knows and to back off as he's worried leah will get the wrong idea . emily fights back hurling accusations & facts at him . before he can stop himself he feels the anger and fear take over him & he phases . he's a step to close to emily & although he backs up almost immediately - his claws catch her face .

read pt 2 for the rest .

[sapphiredhearts-a]

twilight tags ( werewolf edition )