#'long ago he rode away/and where he dwelleth none can say' is actually a reference to artanaro and finduilas going on vacation

[thevalleyisjolly]

I love all the different Gil-Galad theories, and would like to submit another for consideration: All of them are true at once because “Gil-Galad” is actually a group project consisting of a bunch of 4th/5th generation Finwëans all working together to play professional “dodge the Noldorin kingship.”

So sometime during the War of Wrath, Ereinion (Fingon’s son), Artanáro (Finrod’s son), Finellach (Orodreth’s son), Finduilas (very much alive and not pinned to a tree with a spear!), and a very competent Elf of no particular lineage who has nevertheless become a de facto leader by merit and has thus been given the name “Finwain” because he reminds people of a young Finwë, all wash up on Balar.

They realize that their collective existence puts the Exiles in something of a succession crisis, an over-abundance of heirs, if you will. Fortunately, they have all learned a great deal from the lessons of their parents/grandparents/relatives/House of Finwë in general, and the actual problem is that none of them really wants to be king, especially Ereinion who has already been ruling as one but who has disliked nearly every minute of it and was rather hoping that one of his cousins would come take over or at least give him a hand.  He really, really misses Idril so much, who was the real if unofficial Queen of the Noldor in Exile until she sailed.

This gives bright young Finwain an idea: kingship by committee.  They’ll name a king, but really the name is just a stand-in for the lot of them working together.  This way, the Noldor get a figurehead, they can pool their different strengths and make up for each other’s weaknesses, and no one person has to be king alone.

Thus “Gil-Galad” is born.  They decide on the name (”Star of Radiance”) as an homage to Idril (”Sparkling Brilliance”), the first Gil-Galad in spirit if not in name.

Ereinion has already been ruling as a Noldor king and he’s got the nearest claim as Fingon’s son so he’s their “face” guy.  Finwain is excellent with the day-to-day administration and dealing justice.  Artanáro has studied law and economics and politics and is quite good at the statecraft and politicking part of things.  Finellach is a marvellous diplomat.  Finduilas is the best manager in a crisis, who will decide on a course of action and get it done with ruthless determination while everyone else is still dithering, and she’s also become terrifyingly good at foreign policy to boot. 

Galadríel thinks the lot of them have gone around the bend, but that may be because she was not invited to be a Gil-Galadríel when the name practically writes itself, c’mon.  They didn’t ask Celebrimbor either, for obvious reasons but he wouldn’t have accepted anyways.  Elrond is even more adept at dodging crowns and argues very convincingly that he has exactly one Noldorin grandparent whom he never met and that if he really had to pick a lineage, he’d go Sindar first, Man (Númenorean) second, and Noldor a distant fifth or sixth.  They ask Celebrían when she comes of age, partly to irritate Galadríel and mostly because Finduilas would really like another female cousin on the team, but she has far too much common sense to accept.

Surprisingly, it all works out very well.  Finwain and Artanáro have the running of the kingdom down pat between the pair of them.  Finellach manages to make friends and build alliances with nearly everyone, and anyone he can’t charm, he just sics Elrond on them because it’s impossible not to become friends with Elrond.  Ereinion gets their defences into tip-top shape because it might be a new Age but you don’t survive the First Age and remain complacent.  Finduilas takes care of their affairs abroad as well as any crises at home, and is the first person to distrust Annatar when he shows up on their doorstep. 

Sometimes they disagree with each other.  Fortunately, there are an odd number of them so there are never any ties when they have to vote (no one is allowed to abstain).  Anything serious that they really cannot come to a consensus on, they lock themselves in an inner room decorated with a special tapestry that Finduilas had commissioned of the Nirnaeth Arnoediad.  That’s usually enough of a pointed reminder about how the best-intended unions can come to ruin if they don’t manage to meet as one on the same ground.

At the end of the Second Age, they collectively agree that the Noldor in Middle-earth don’t need any more High Kings.  Anyways, it's difficult to carry on as Gil-Galad without Ereinion ever since he died nobly and publicly in the Last Alliance.  Finellach decides to sail.  Finduilas goes East on a long vacation to see all the rest of Middle-earth.  Artanáro also decides to take a long vacation and goes larking around Middle-earth in a Wandering Company.  Finwain retires to the Havens and settles down to help Círdan build ships. 

And they all lived happily ever after.  Even Ereinion, who almost beat Finrod’s record of coming back from the Halls of Mandos and who promptly became a champion sprinter when an intrigued Finarfin started asking if he thought this kingship by committee idea could work for the Noldor in Aman.