#I know I keep joking about this despite half of the drug scenes I've written not yet having been published

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

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[inkwingsinc]

ok so about my lack of update. I got sidetracked writing about the nightmare horse (!!!!spoiler!!!!) and the other flesh gifts Feyd is going to give Laera. Harkonnen giftgiving traditions are atrocious, I've decided. Also I've re-written chap 21 like three times and I'm pretty sure some of my readers will unionize to beat my ass if I don't post eventually. ~tee hee~

Here, have some random headcanons related to BMGWMBGG because I'm deranged:

the Harkonnen tradition of offering "flesh gifts" to the bride is essentially the manifestation of that one post that's like "my love language is acts of service and all I know how to do is kill"

given that Geidi Prime has to pump groundwater since the planet has no oceans and little rainfall, there are likely thermal pools/natural springs somewhere in the Fortress. They function like bath houses, essentially. Feyd-Rautha visits them frequently.

the Harkonnen tradition of draping their brides in betrothal chains came from the practice of having to physically restrain their wives because uhhhhh they did not often consent to marriage. Now the chains are just brutally pretty jewelry, but in ye olden days Harkonnens would kidnap their brides caveman style

the ceremonial lyggal warpaint is mixed with human blood. often the wearer's

Harkonnen men totally get married half-naked covered in warpaint. How else is the bride supposed to take her blood rite if he's all covered up? :(

Geidi Prime has a renowned rave scene. Party drugs? Evil techno? That's basically Tuesday for the upper classes

Despite keeping appearance of the contrary, Feyd-Rautha is not a hedonist with all pleasures. He holds himself to the standard of a warrior and forces purity of mind and body so that he can feel superior to others. Baby boi deffo has an eating disorder and like six different hangups about eating in front of others. Violence is his chief vice but sex is a close second, so he's not a monk all the time...

Feyd-Rautha thinks it's just so charming that women have a menstrual cycle. oh his partner lifts her skirt? and she's already bleeding? it's like Christmas came twice.

Feyd-Rautha has met Princess Irulan on two occasions prior to Arrakis. He was buck-ass naked during their first meeting (I will not explain) and covered in blood for their second. The Baron offered Feyd as a marriage prospect to the Emperor's daughter both times. "isn't my nephew strong? isn't he capable? wouldn't you like to give him children?" *gestures to the horrible little man covered in blood*

Feyd-Rautha is freaked out by horses. It's the spindly legs...

Feyd-Rautha's favorite food is nutrient paste. I am not joking