#I know there's at least one oingo fucker out there

[jjba-smash-or-pass]

[medea10]

My Review of 22/7

How did I get into this anime? Fuck it! I picked a random anime to watch for the winter line-up. Let’s hit it!

22/7 is an idol group for real in Japan with one hell of a fanbase. LET’S GIVE THEM THEIR OWN ANIME!

Okay!

So, eight total strangers are picked by random to become part of an idol group. That’s essentially it! Eight girls who don’t know each other are told to meet some gorilla producer at a zoo and told to drop everything in their lives to become idols. What the literal and actual fuck?!

First of all, the concept of having all of these young girls being eyed and taken to some underground penthouse has Jeffery Epstein AND R. Kelly vibes ALL OVER THIS MESS! Although, I will give this anime some credit that these girls are at least high school age or older (but not by much)!

We’ve got a shy, introvert named Miu. Then there’s the blonde, cutie from America, Sakura. Nicole, the only one with an interest of becoming an idol. Junko, the spunky girl with butt-loads of energy. The no-nonsense and let’s get down to business, Akane. Miyako, the girl with sisterly love. The practical one, Reika. And Ayaka...she’s also in the group! These eight girls make up the group, 22/7 (a group name to this day I’m not sure why it’s called that).

They are then told to obey a wall…

OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE! A wall? Seriously?! A God-damned wall?! These girls and the people promoting 22/7 are to obey plates that are shit out by a wall! I know idol animes are notorious for fucked up storylines, but…I can’t even here! Becoming idols because it’s been your life-long dream like in Idolm@ster, that is fine! Becoming idols in order to save your school from being shut down like in Love Live, that is fine! Becoming idols because an eccentric necromancer brings you back from the dead like in Zombieland Saga, fucking awesome! A wall that must be obeyed when giving decisions on an idol group…what the literal and actual fuck!

Here’s what most episodes are set up like.

1. The Wall gives out an order. 2. One of the girls doesn’t want to do *insert activity here*. 3. Flashbacks play off and on for girl of the day. 4. You must do what The Wall says. 5. I don’t want to. 6. BITCH, DON’T GO AGAINST THE WALL. THE WALL IS GOD!!! 7. Pout, contemplate, and more flashbacks play. 8. Fine, I’ll do it. 9. Play the ending theme!

BETWEEN THE SUB AND THE DUB: This anime is licensed by the good folks at Aniplex (and possibly FUNimation). Crunchyroll added this one month after the initial release. If you’re all wondering why that’s happening to a lot of Crunchyroll-picked animes, yeah keep wondering. Sony has control over Aniplex and FUNimation and as a result Crunchyroll has a delay on several animes (including this one). It’s an inconvenience and just raises the rates of people downloading the episodes illegally. Once again, thanks for nothing, Sony! Give Crunchyroll some credit as they do give people in other countries streaming benefits. FUNimation is primarily U.S.

With that rant off my chest, on with the cast! Now this might just be first episode jitters and all, but a lot of the voices here seemed very bland. And you know it’s gotta be that bad if even I am riffing on the voices…FROM JAPAN! Well, much like many other idol shows like Idolm@ster and Love Live, the voices for the girls are only going to be known for their Idol group work. With the exception of two girls, this is everyone’s first official anime role. Here’s everyone!

*Miu is played by Nagomi Saijou

*Sakura is played by Sally Amaki (known for Betsy on Kaguya-sama)

*Jun is played by Ruri Umino

*Reika is played by Chiharu Hokaze (known for Silvia on Fate/Grand Order)

*Akane is played by Kanae Shirosawa

*Ayaka is played by Reina Miyase

*Miyako is played by Mizuha Kuraoka

*Nicole is played by Mei Hanakawa

FAVORITE CHARACTER: Miu.

Prior to episode 11, it was more of a me connecting with this particular character due to having many introvert connections. But after Nicole’s flashback where Miu beats the crap out of a bully, Miu is best girl.

IDOL TROPES: So let’s see if 22/7 has the usual tropes normally seen in many other idol animes.

* A shy, introvert character (right from second one) * A bitch who thinks she knows all about the idol world (not as bad as Dia, but heavy on the bitch part, yes) * Shotty CGI for the dance scenes (right in the fucking opening) * Bikini episode (check) * One of the girls has a fuck-ton of siblings and is one of the most eccentric of the bunch (oh yeah) *A robotic character or IS A ROBOT (Akane is not a robot, but she’s monotone for like 96% of the series excluding flashbacks)

ENDING: It’s been close to one year since all eight of these girls were chosen for this “project” We’ve already seen back-stories/flashbacks of almost all of the girls (except for Nicole and Miu) and now 22/7 is about to prepare for their one year anniversary as a group. But then the wall gave out an order! And the plate simply read, “Disband”.

Could you be any more cliché?

Maybe it wasn’t obvious for you, but for me I knew that was coming. And no, this wasn’t a joke! There wasn’t smudge on the wall’s platelet. These girls are to disband, lie their way through a press conference explaining the disbandment, all the people a part of this experiment are out of a job, and the girls are to go back to their regular lives before any of this happened.

Can they though?

These girls just spent a whole year being thrust into a position they never expected to be in and leaving their families and future plans behind. These girls are late-teens; they’re trying to prepare for work or college! A lot of them even had to work through a lot of baggage weighing them down (particularly Jun, Akane, and Reika)! Then all of a sudden, the wall shits out an order and says to disband. There was nothing wrong with the higher-ups or the group. Everyone was now enthusiastic about doing everything possible to make 22/7 a household name. But because a fucking wall gave the command to disband, everyone’s gotta drop their shit, lose their income (which some people like Reika, Ayaka, and Miyako could use), and just pull-out of already planned events.

THEN, you make the girls lie their way through a press conference by giving vague answers to the media about the disbandment! In my opinion, the girls could have lied and said there was fall-out at the top and it was out of their hands. I know the girls can’t simply say, “the magical wall told us to disband and we can’t go against the almighty wall”.

Well, we’re about two episodes away from the finale and it’s about time to see the backstories of Miu and Nicole. Believe it or not, these two have a history that goes back a ways (though it seems like Miu doesn’t remember Nicole). Would you believe that Nicole was once a shy introvert with a stuttering complex? Yeah, it’s true. The character who was seen as a bitch from episode one was once a shy, introvert.

It wasn’t until Nicole was pushed to do something against her will and a little help from Miu that she was able to come out of her shell. But enough of the flashback!

It’s now one month since the girls were told to disband. And for one reason or another, all eight of the girls made their way to the old production building. I guess they were all feeling nostalgic for the one year they spent as idols. They have a good cry. And all of a sudden…

The wall spoke?!

The wall pretty much said that this was merely an experiment and when the girls asked to reunite, the wall denied them. So then Miu goes savage on the wall…

Okay, Miu is best girl of this series!

The other girls follow suit and break the wall, making an opening.

Once inside, the girls stumbled upon something quite disturbing. These girls have been tracked, not only throughout their idol careers, but before then too! There were shots of the girls when they were children! What kind of freakshow, One Hour Photo, Truman Show, fucked up shit is this?! This is all sorts of WRONG! How is this fucker not in jail? WHO IS THIS FUCKER?! No, I will not be quiet about this! Everything about this is so fucka wrong I can’t even! Who follows little girls secretly for most of their lives taking pictures of them? Let’s think about that…

*Perverts *Fucking perverts *R. Kelly *Oingo Boingo levels of perversion *State of Florida levels of perversion *Jefferey Epstein

New theory that goes along with old theory! Jefferey Epstein was killed in prison when his neck was snapped because AG Bill Barr sat on it. And before the devil sentences him to a lifetime of misery and woe, he gives him one last chance to atone for his actions. Instead, he stalks little girls in Japan. HOLY SHIT, THIS IS STARTING TO MAKE SENSE!

Medea…the review?!

Oh right!

The girls leave the disturbing room (never to be seen or talked about again) and I guess we’re never gonna get a clue on the identity of our pervert that hides behind a wall. They walk away and end up on a stage. And in the audience, were all their loyal and devoted fans. You see, they happened to gather on what was supposed to be their one year anniversary and their fans held out hope that they would still perform on their anniversary like they promised before the disbandment notice hit.

They performed. I guess 22/7 is back together. I guess we can disobey the wall just this once.

The wall shits out a new platelet saying add 3 more members.

We end seeing those three new girls that we may or may not see again. It depends on whether 22/7 was good enough to warrant a season two.

If the Jeffery Epstein rants weren’t an indicator, I was not fond of this series. Maybe I was just turned off at the concept of eight total strangers being told all of a sudden they’re idols because a fucking wall commanded it. I’m pretty sure it’s because of the storyline involving a wall and having to obey it. The songs were just okay, whenever we got to hear them. Unlike a lot of other idol animes, we really didn’t see a lot of performances from 22/7 outside of the opening and ending themes.

The one thing I was really invested in were surprisingly the flashbacks from all of the girls. A lot of these stories do lay on the drama really thick. But you really wish that everything’s gonna work out in the end. Like you really wish Miyako could see her biological father again or want a happy ending for Akane and her family. But then you get a back-story like Jun’s. Oof, that one was a gut-punch! I’m no fan of this show, but episode 7 is the go-to episode.

Now, I’ll watch 22/7 if it gets a season two. I try not to give up on an anime, no matter how much it annoys me. I like to see things through to the bitter end. But as for recommendations, there are far better idol shows to choose from.

Yes, I see that it’s a stretch to say there are GOOD idol shows. I know the stigma and hate that they get. But I am not one of those people. I thought Idolm@ster was okay. I liked Love Live just fine. UtaPri amuses me (and yes I count it as an idol show). Zombieland Saga, fuck yeah! This, not so much!

But if you want to watch, FUNimation has all 12 episodes available for streaming. And Crunchyroll has…a few as of this date and time. Again I point out that Crunchyroll couldn’t even get streaming rights to this until a full month after it began airing. Thanks again, Sony!

[iicewitch]

of frost and incantations

a gencore playlist. idea by @glitchedwitch​

listen: here on spotify

tracklist:

Seventeen by MARINA Drumming Song by Florence + The Machine Inexplicable by The Correspondents Wriggle by Cosmo Sheldrake Build God, Then We’ll Talk by Panic! At the Disco Policy of Truth by Depeche Mode Are you Satisfied? by MARINA What the Water Gave Me by Florence + The Machine Hermit the Frog by MARINA O my Heart by Mother Mother Under My Skin by Jukebox the Ghost & by Tally Hall Princess by tophamhatkyo Sticks and Stones by The Pierces Donut Hole by Hachi American Beauty/American Psycho by Fall Out Boy Volatile Times by IAMX Angry Sea by Mother Mother Guilty by MARINA No One LIvers Forever by Oingo Boingo Come Away To The Water by Maroon 5 and Rozzi Nobody by Mitski

important lyrics to me for each song under read more:

SEVENTEEN 

Could never tell you what happened The day I turned seventeen The rise of a king and the fall of a queen, oh

Never felt like a princess I used to kill myself in this dress That it was just how things Were meant to be Oh, seventeen DRUMMING SONG

But as the water fills my mouth It couldn't wash the echoes out But as the water fills my mouth It couldn't wash the echoes out I swallow the sound and it swallows me whole Until there's nothing left inside my soul As empty as that beating drum But the song has just begun

INEXPLICABLE

Inexplicably high Inexplicably low I think I know what I want, but I don't know where to go And all the while it seems that I'm living in my dreams I'm not in the know (Not in the know) No, not in the know

WRIGGLE

Say there, the jug or the hare? The lift or the stairs? Which will it be for you? How now, big brown cow? The bow or the bough? The spade or the plough for you?

But where will we go When the bell, it tolls for me? Both you and I know When it tolls, well, it tolls for thee

BUILD GOD AND THEN WE’LL TALK

Moonlighting aside, she really needs his money Oh, wonderful caricature of intimacy

There are no... Raindrops on roses and girls in white dresses It's sleeping with roaches and taking best guesses At the shade of the sheets and before all the stains And a few more of your least favorite things

POLICY OF TRUTH

You'll see your problems multiplied If you continually decide To faithfully pursue The policy of truth

You had something to hide Should have hidden it, shouldn't you? Now you're not satisfied With what you're being put through

ARE YOU SATISFIED?

Sad inside, in this life Unsatisfied, praying Sad inside, in this life Unsatisfied, waiting

'Cause it's my problem if I wanna pack up and run away It's my business if I feel the need to smoke and drink and sway It's my problem, it's my problem if I feel the need to hide And it's my problem if I have no friends and feel I want to die It's my problem, it's my problem on how fast I will succeed WHAT THE WATER GAVE ME And oh, poor Atlas The world’s a beast of a burden You’ve been holding on a long time

Because they took your loved ones But returned them in exchange for you But would you have it any other way? Would you have it any other way? You couldn't have it any other way

HERMIT THE FROG

They call him Hermit the Frog He's looking for a dog Did you find your bitch in me? Oh, you're abominable socially You're just a little bit too much like me Yeah, I feel I'm watered down Whenever he's around I put on the crown of clowns And melt slowly to the ground When my heart just burst like a glass balloon I let it fly too high and it shattered too soon I was the wrong damn girl in the wrong damn room O MY HEART

Oh my heart, it's so damn so cold So damn cold

And I throw my heart into the fire 'Cause I want to set my heart on fire And I watch it try, befriending embers But the ice don't melt in mid-December

UNDER MY SKIN

I can fit two people under my skin Yeah, I can fit two people under my skin And I will prove it if you will listen You crawled up in there, you joined me within

Well, oh no, not a chance in hell Yeah, I've heard you sing, but it ain't too well Heartfelt, yeah,, you meant so well But your song's no good 'round here

&

You hate each other & you love yourselves It might be heaven & it might be hell Oh the things we do The things we say Oh the things we wish we could wash away Weak & Strong & Wet & Dry & Right & Wrong & Live & Die & Sane & Gone & Love & Not & All the &s that we forgot Princess Two-faced princess causing a ruckus in the community’s circle A psychopath wearing a harmless mask. It’s me! Tired of superficial love Don’t try to control me I’m not your fucking puppet! I have the wings of both an angel and a devil.

STICKS AND STONES

Sun in the sky I am stopping you from burning All we need is stars and moon Clock on the wall I will keep your hands from turning Or this night will end too soon

And I could tell you a witch’s spell But you just might blow your top Then you start to run just as I’m having fun And it’s awfully hard to stop

DONUT HOLE

Not knowing anything at all Well that won’t hurt you will it? Even still, it robs me of sleep. And if you found out I bet you’d laugh I can’t hope on, things that have passed So just give me a figure to bury for certain

AMERICAN BEAUTY / AMERICAN PSYCHO

You take the full, full truth, then you pour some out And as we're drifting off to sleep All those dirty thoughts of me They were never yours to keep, keep, whoa

Us, we were pity sex, nothing more and nothing less

VOLATILE TIMES

I imagine all the brutal services Of ancient infidels Of all the wounded and the crying witches

Goodbye my friends Goodbye to the money Adieu to the fuckers that think that it's funny

Every book is read and I'm paralyzed Every fist is clenched, but I'm so tired

ANGRY SEA

I don't want the same disease That everybody's got these days I don't wanna live that way I do not wanna live in pain

It's coming like a big freight train It's spreading like a wild flame You know it's coming all our ways So dig your dirt and make your grave Mamma save me, come on and vaccinate me

GUILTY

Guilty on the run, and I know what I have done Guilty on the run, and I'm never forgiven I was just a kid that you could not forgive because it's harder I was just a kid and all I really wanted was my father

Spent years singing to forget (To forget) I spent years singing "no regret" Then suddenly, it all becomes clear I've been sorry all these years

NO ONE LIVES FOREVER

No one beats him at his game For very long, but just the same Who cares; there's no place safe to hide Nowhere to run—no time to cry So celebrate while you still can 'Cause any second, it may end

COME AWAY TO THE WATER

Come away little lamb Come away to the water To the arms that are waiting only for you Come away little lamb come away to the slaughter To the one appointed to see this through We are calling for you We are coming for you

NOBODY

I just want somebody near me Guess I'm a coward I just want to feel alright And I know no one will save me

I've been big and small and Big and small and Big and small again And still nobody wants me Still nobody wants me

[kitsun3imp0ster]

MORE SHITPOST

Anubus: My life isn't as glamourous as my wanted poster makes it look.

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Alessi: Hey, you want a tarot reading? Oingo: Those are Pokemon cards. Alessi: You got a magikarp. Oingo: ... Alessi: It means 'fuck you'

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Boingo: I just wanna be called cute 21/7. Alessi: Why no 24/7? Boingo: Snack breaks.

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*Comments under an image of a really hot knife cutting bread* Robyn: Imagine stabbing someone with this knife. Mariah: It would instantly cauterize the wound, so the person wouldn't bleed, so it's not very useful. D. Darby: if you want information it is Anubus: why would you STAB a person when you can have TOAST?

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Vanilla Ice: If I'm extra sarcastic with you it probably means I'm flirting with you or you really annoy me and I can't handle your crap... have fun figuring out which one.

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T. Darby: I'll offer you some friendly advice- D. Darby: I don't want your advice. T. Darby: Well, then consider it unfriendly advice.

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Anubus: You fuckers don’t know about my knife stick. It’s a knife taped to a stick and it’s the ultimate weapon. Vanilla Ice: Spear. Anubus: BLOCKED.

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Robyn: If you get in trouble, I'm gonna be like... a lawyer to you. Ok? Alessi: Okay. *later* Oingo: Alessi! Sit down on the chair, you're in trouble. Robyn, whispering: Deny everything. Alessi, loudly: That isn't a chair.

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Alessi: FIGHT ME, YOU NERD ASS SLUT! Boingo: At least try to sound slightly more sophisticated when you threaten someone. Alessi: Oh, I'm sorry. I should ask; dost thou want to engage in a duel, my good bitch? Boingo: Somehow that's worse.

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T. Darby: Can you be quiet?! I'm trying to think. N' doul: Don't worry. Doing anything for the first time is difficult.

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Mariah: You’re a loose cannon, Oingo. Oingo: No, I’m not. I’m a cannon, maybe, but a loose cannon? Is that what you think of me? N' doul: I think you play by your own rules. Anubus: No way, they think rules were made to be broken. Mariah: Those are all attributes of a loose cannon. Oingo: No, I’m just a reckless renegade. Robyn is a loose cannon. Robyn: *smashes a chair* Aah! You shut your trap, Oingo! Anubus: I’d say Robyn’s more of a cop on the edge with nothing to lose. That’s an entirely different thing. N' doul: Now I’m just confused. Is Oingo a loose cannon or not? Mariah: All right, put on a pot of coffee. We’re gonna get to the bottom of this. Oingo: *groans* Robyn: Aw, man.

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Mariah: Do you think I’m ugly? Vanilla Ice: It’s not about looks, Mariah. What’s valuable is on the inside... Mariah: Vanilla Ice... Vanilla Ice: For example, someone's heart. Mariah: Aw... Stop it- Vanilla Ice: It could be purchased for more than a million dollars, you know. Mariah: Seriously, stop.

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D. Darby, holding up their class notes: And then this doodle of a burrito because when I first read Aristotle, I thought it was pronounced like “Chipotle”. D. Darby, in shock: Wait a minute, is it “Chip-o-tottle”?

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Alessi: I came out here to attack people and I'm honestly having such a good time right now.

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T. Darby: I did it! I memorized everything in the book! I'm gonna ace this test! N' doul: Ok, T. Darby, I'll give you one more question before you go. What ended in 1918? T. Darby: 1917. N’ doul: ...You're ready.

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D. Darby: I am going to need you to swear- Oingo: Fuck. D. Darby: D. Darby: ...swear as in promise.

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N' doul: Dumbest scar stories, go! T. Darby: I burned my tongue once drinking tea. Boingo: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and it burned. Oingo: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade. Mariah: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it in my hand and I got a really bad burn. Alessi: I have emotional scars.

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N' doul: Caffeine no longer keeps me awake while I work, so instead I have D. Darby periodically send me texts saying ‘we need to talk.’ N' doul: It gives me the right amount of adrenaline and fear I need to keep going.