#I'm really good at explicitly detailing my mental state and appropriate action even in the middle of a crisis | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

murky-tannin · 1 year

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You can tell your mom a trigger every week for 5 years and explicitly say “can’t talk about that topic with u rn im triggered and need to calm down” after she repeatedly brings it up and she’ll still go “what's wrong? Is it the flu shot you just got? Was it *entirely irrelevant incident weeks ago that you were not emotionally compromised by*? No im not leaving until I know why.” and you’ll go with every last bit of strength bc you are on the verge of a breakdown “because you brought up X” and SHE’LL go “why aren’t you explaining? Just tell me” and get mad when you eventually start screaming "Just leave me alone I need to calm down” because fuck being reasonable ig.

#venting #murky mumbles #dw this isn't gonna be a normal thing on this blog #but wow am I annoyed #she's usually like actually decent too #she turned her brain off tonight #I'm really good at explicitly detailing my mental state and appropriate action even in the middle of a crisis #She KNOWS this #so when im literally fucking telling her 'hey im being irrational rn because I was triggered by this subject matter and need to be left #alone for a little bit to calm down and no I can't specify further for reasons I just stated' she should know better then to ignore me??#god im just #so annoyed #I never yell #Ever #I do not yell when I'm triggered #Because I Explain The Correct Way To Deal With Me In The Moment #and mostly people aren't totally braindead and can semi listen #But apparently when heavily fucking pushed I do yell #but not in a 'fuck you' way #Im discovering new things abt myself #woo #I WISH I was more aggressive frankly I deserve to go a bit apeshit?? It's so exhausting being reasonable and palatable when triggered

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