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#One of these days i checked this ao3😒 and this fuckin t0p d4niel fanfic that traumatized me had an update...and i didn't felt nothing
celibibratty
·
1 year
Text
Don't you have afraid of the healing, get healead to a point where you will you stop caring, this is what you always wanted and prayed for, but if this is leading you to the End?
#One of these days i checked this ao3😒 and this fuckin t0p d4niel fanfic that traumatized me had an update...and i didn't felt nothing
#Of course i still not dare to look at it but geez i remember that Both 2020 and 2021 when i passed by this shit/when appeared/had updates..
#My body used to tremble so fast i used to cry of stress/anger but this year i didn't got afraid i felt nothing
#Maybe because i kinda used to it now i not that naive anymore i don't get surprised
#Still if i getting so healed to a point where i will stop caring about this game?
#If i growing out of it?💧
#Tsc this is lie i still do get very affected i still get carried away by those things sometimes (proving that i still care about them)
#Like woah i/we liked this game when we had 14/15 years and this year i'll do 20 years (if i'm getting tired? Cuz i kinda growing💧)
#No! i like to think this is actually a good sign that i starting to have a more health/balanced relationship with this game
#To a point where i don't take those shitty versions of them💢🔥 that seriously
#reflection
#I don't feel that conected to this game these days please please Just be a phase please Just be a phase💧
#I know whenever i still believe it i will still keep it but i can't control it i can't control it the emptiness
#Idk playing the games makes me realize like ;woah its so good to consume the thing that you enjoy but not stressing about it;
#I like s1fu w0man and i/we playing the game but i don't feel sick or intimidated playing it cuz i know i won't find something that triggers
#I know the game is kinda okay and our protagonist are DECENT💢🔥different from this game imagine me playing it urgh...
#I get so anxious i have afraid of find out something i won't like it (triggers) or i wish i couldn't know
#Like it's so different so different that it hurts notice it
#And i can comfirm it ;playing-it-it's-different-than-seen-it; play it's a different experience you notice more things
#I can't i never want to play this game in my life i don't want to find out what i will feel i don't want to revive everything over again
#Please brain be just a phase
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