#also i'm sorry i couldn't keep from mentioning the varus thing IDFJASDFHADF i just think it's neat....

[deathdxnces]

does irelia reminisce a certain about kai? does she just keeps her brother in her thoughts, or also prayers? and moreso, any keepsake he left behind that she holds onto?

— anon.

yes! to a certain degree all of her brothers are still on her mind, despite it being many years now since they died. there are lots of things that remind her of them, be it places, objects, creatures, songs or situations; they were deeply important to her, and the things they shared still bring them to her mind often. and while some were closer than others (and she definitely doesn't reminisce about ruu as often, for example, considering he was too baby and she was studying in the placidium for most of his life), kai is definitely in her thoughts a lot. probably as much as zelos, considering i always picture them as the ones she was closest to.

there's no actual canon information about her brothers' ages or the order of birth, but i hc kai to be considerably older than irelia, being one of the two eldest and already at least a young adult when the war began. so they weren't really close in age. in spite of that, i hc they had a good relationship for the most part; maybe they fought sometimes, as siblings are prone to do (and i can assure you a big age difference does not in fact prevent that from happening adkjfnjdf), and maybe they didn't always get along, but ultimately they loved each other a lot, and i think by the time he was older anything of the sort would long have been left behind.

irelia likes to remember, either way; she doesn't want to forget her family (she's actually very afraid one day she won't remember them well anymore), so i think she would actively seek to continue doing things she did with them, or caring for things they cared about. nothing is said about kai, really, so it's hard to tell what exactly those things would be in his case. whatever it was that he was particularly fond of, you can be sure she is now fond of as well, if only because it reminds her of her brother and how much love he had for that.

i kinda want to lean on my her brother kai is also the kai in varus bullshit and say his interests might be aligned with that sense of being a hunter and also the whole philosophy thing kai (varus' kai) says he studied, but. i'm refraining from leaning on that too much aisudhfaiuhf still. i extra like the idea because then he'd have studied at the placidium like she did and there's a bunch other things they could've shared then c': but i won't get into that either aushuash

but yeah i think she definitely thinks of him, and that she tries to remember too. what he liked, what he was like, the things they shared. kai is also kept in her prayers for sure. wherever he is, irelia hopes (and prays) he is at peace and that his spirit was allowed something better than the violent death her family had. i think, as with everyone else in her family, she also prays for his forgiveness; because she always feels what she became would be a disappointment to her family, and she loved and looked up to them a lot, and she still thinks they would be devastated by the things she has done (and by the fact she does not regret doing them). and kai, being one of her older brothers, definitely is no exception to that, so she'd also want his forgiveness — even though she has yet to be brave enough to try to communicate directly with her family's spirits through the spirit blossoms and the festival.

as to keepsakes, unfortunately no, she doesn't have any. anything she had to remember him by was regrettably lost or destroyed during the war. her blades are the only thing she has from her family at all, since they were formed from their family crest. it's actually something that's always made her sad, that she couldn't even keep anything to remember them by.