#and as a result kept failing classes []'d been doing extremely well in prior to the arrival of Final Paper Guillotine | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

7fff00 · 3 months ago

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unfortunately every time i contemplate perpetrating a text post i get a sentence or three into it only to experience agonies over the hideousness of my own prose styling

which is putting something of a crimp in this whole 'what if i started blogging again' experiment

#there's of course also the question of like. do i owe it to myself and/or to my ~audience~ to Explain My Long Absence #or like. 'owe' is the wrong word. but there IS stuff i'm interested in unpacking #however as a guy who took an extra decade to get a BA bc [] couldn't write a paper to save [] life #and as a result kept failing classes []'d been doing extremely well in prior to the arrival of Final Paper Guillotine #(side note oh boy am i developing new pronoun problems. is this an exciting new development i will promptly be proceeding to ignore.)#(MAYBE SO.)#the idea of like. writing a whole big personal essay abt the issues i developed from the environment i turned tumblr into for myself #(yes that's awkward phrasing but i get frustrated when people get on tumblr to complain about tumblr without acknowledging that like #whatever tumblr is for you is what you've said yes‚ either actively or passively‚ to letting accrete around you #so like. not gonna let myself off the hook abt that any more than i would anyone else. i said yes a thousand times to my own ruination.)#is. well. i like to think i've learned a LITTLE about setting myself up for failure‚ lmao #i expect i WILL get into it eventually bc like. what are we all here for if not some degree of omphaloskepsis #but like. just say no to the big opening programmatic mission statement concept #instead you get the deliberately-mediocre scribble to break in the sketchbook #and maybe down the line some other stuff in dribs and drabs

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