#and i did rewatch some of the movie last night and lordddd guys HE'S SO 😩😩💖💘💖💘💖💘

[rexscanonwife]

Been talking to Nic and Ruby a little bit about this crush and BOYS I THINK I'M IN TROUBLE HERE 😳😳

[raevfitta]

Eurovision Semifinal 1

I’m going to rewatch the first semifinal and go through the songs today because I don’t think watching on my phone, in the pub, gave me the best impression of the performances (it always prevented me from actively commenting.....). I will hopefully be able to do preview thoughts for the second semifinal in the afternoon so I feel “prepared.” This is a mix between my expectations, reactions, and general whininess. 

I can just comment that the Salty Swedish commenters went right for the throat when they commented how the Ukrainians decided that three young white men are how to “celebrate” diversity. Justtttt....

1.  Sweden Robin Bengtsson "I Can’t Go On" (Advanced to finals) - I complained during Melodifestivalen that this wasn’t my favourite song. And it still isn’t. I think that Nano and Wictoria had better songs and performances but whatEveR here we ARE with THIS. I always want Sweden to win (just so I can go to the final lolll) but to me this doesn’t sound like a winning song. It is Justin Timberlake lite and he just BOTHERS ME. He looks like if an alien were to try to create an attractive human from memory and something went wrong in the process. But in the Sea of Ballads that is this year, I at least enjoy that the song is “upbeat.” He doesn’t blow me away, needless to say. 3/5 And a question about this performance, are they not wearing socks???? 

2.  Georgia Tamara Gatjetjiladze "Keep the Faith" (Did not advance) - This semifinal was a slog to get through just because of (as the Swedish commentators pointed out) the Jamala effect. This song was three minutes long but felt soooo much longer. She looks like some one performing on the ferry to Finland. We trained but just meh. I think she had a decent voice and an okay performance but the song was just...so middle of the row. 3/5

3.  Australia Isaiah "Don't Come Easy" (Advanced to finals) - Other than the ballad trend, the X-Factor/Voice/Idol trend realllllyyyy bothers me. He sings really well but this song sounds like a fucking Idol final. This is the first Australia song that didn’t blow me away on the first listen. I fucking hate the stupid pictures of performers as the backdrop too so this song can go fuck itself. It has more drama live (except for that odd squeaking thing he did towards the end when he tried to reach a high note wtf was that) but loses points because of the spinning video of himself in the background. I knew it would go to the finals on reputation alone but that’s the same with Sweden. You’ve got to really phone it in to not make the finals from Aus and Swe. 3/5

4.  Albania Lindita "World" (Did not advance) - I could guess from the recorded version that she would not do well live and well, here we are. Eurovision continues its tradition of not being able to afford pants for female entrants and the men’s pants are getting shorter and shorter...This is another plodding ballad that is so empty of meaning. I’m not surprised this didn’t advance. Forgettable. 2/5

5.  Belgium Blanche "City Lights" (Advanced to finals) - I was so happy when this advanced. She still looks scared performing but I really enjoy the text and the tempo of this song. This is a song that grows on me and reminds me a little of Anouk’s “Birds” from ESC2013, which was another song that grew on me. I wish that Blanche didn’t look petrified of performing. It’s like she would rather be singing behind a partition or something. 4/5 

6.  Montenegro Slavko Kalezić "Space" (Did not advance) - The first upbeat song and of course it didn’t go to the finals. This has a bit of Modern Talking feel and is just classic Eurovision. His voice is not that strong live but he makes up for it with enthusiasm. He needed backup dancers or something because he looks sort of ... lonely... on the stage with only himself and his hair. But again the stupid fucking spinning images of the performer sour this for me. Entertaining and upbeat at least!!! 3/5 (They kept cutting to the crowd and they do not look like they are having a good time....and lol the app keeps telling me that there are tickets left the finale??? What???)

(And the hosts make me miss Petra, as much as I actively dislike her. They are like annoying little cousins that think they are funny but just UGH.)

7.  Finland Norma John "Blackbird" (Did not advance) - I didn’t enjoy this from the album but when I heard (and watched) this, this really grew on me. It reminded me (a little) of the Common Linnets from 2014. I guess it was a 50-50 if this or Belgium were going to go on and Belgium took it. She sings with passion and this song grows on me. Too bad, try again next year Finland. 4/5.

8.  Azerbaijan Dihaj "Skeletons" (Advanced to finals) - Fucking Azerbaijan. She was like WHISPERING as she sung and good LORD that stage performance looked like something a high school drama club would put on with the theme “how to make Eurovision memes but Italy already took Harambe so I guess Horsehead masks are still big right???”. This reminded me of SO MANY “middle of the road” Eurovision songs. Is there something wrong with her MIC? Just ugh. This is another song that takes a million years. Can she be Skeletor instead? 0/5

9.  Portugal Salvador Sobral "Amar pelos dois" (Advanced to finals) - Okay, finally a song not in English. I love the story behind this song and find the performance really charming, but the song is just not my cup of tea. It makes me think of something from a classic movie. It’s nice that it went to the finals and I like how it is an actual song with meaning behind its metaphors rather than just Random Metaphor Generated ballads like most of the other songs tonight. 3.5/5 (not a winner but a fine song. Gets an extra half point for not being in English)

(I can’t wait to watch the semifinal and final without the commentators. Måns is fine but good lordddd Edward af Sillén is trying too hard ughhhhh)

10.  Greece Demy "This Is Love" (Advanced to finals) - Another typical Eurovision song but at least it is upbeat and not a plodding ballad. She is a little weak live but at least she wasn’t “alone” with her strange swan-men backup dancers splashing around. She actually looks embarrassed to have them there (but that could be the permanent smile she has plastered on her face). Meh. 3/5.

11.  Poland Kasia Moś "Flashlight" (Advanced to finals) - (More like FLESHLIGHT, am I right you guys????? Hahhahhaaa I’m so funny) I always have a soft spot for Poland. I don’t dislike this song but it is another “slowly building towards some sort of drama” ballad. Bring back the butter churners. 3/5. 

12.  Moldova SunStroke Project "Hey Mamma" (Advanced to finals) - Epic Sax Guy returns and does not disappoint. Too bad this song sounds like a discount Jason Derulo song. Upbeat song at least trying something a little different and giving another classic Eurovision moment (and moments come Saturday). This might be one of the few songs I put on a playlist post-competition (I can say that right now this year seems more forgettable than usual....) and even though the dance is fairly basic I might have to start doing more Running Man dance moves 4/5 (bonus points for that fucking saxophone because Internet.)

13.  Iceland Svala "Paper" (Did not advance) - It is always discouraging when none of the other “Nordic” countries make it out of the semis. Sweden does not spread the love, clearly. This reminds me of a Greta’s entry from last year a little. I don’t understand how goddamned Azerbaijan goes to the final but this doesn’t. I think she needed some backup dancers or something because she doesn’t know what to do with her arms. Shame she isn’t going forward but this was an average song to begin with. 3/5. 

(God damn the hosts are CREEPY and the jokes are so like UGH. The only thing that is more aggravating is how Edward is reacting because he sounds exasperated....)  

14.  Czech Republic Martina Bárta "My Turn" (Did not advance) - Poor Czech Republic. I really want them to do well and not back out of the competition again. But poor Martina looks EXHAUSTED out there like she didn’t sleep last night. I enjoy this song and thought it had a chance to make the finals over some shittier songs (*cough* Azerbaijan *cough*). Charming song, shame it isn’t going forward. But it is good they found Belgium’s outfit from last year in an adult size. 3/5

15.  Cyprus Hovig "Gravity"  (Advanced to finals) - This is a song that grows on me. It reminds me a little of Hungary from last year. BUT DO THEY FORBID SOCKS AND PANTS OF A PROPER LENGTH AT EUROVISION? Catchy song, a decent stage performance (although we’ve seen it before). Don’t see it winning but I will enjoy listening to it on Saturday. 4/5.

16.  Armenia Artsvik "Fly With Me"  (Advanced to finals) - Finally something that makes the song a little more “unique” (honestly, none of the previous entries sound like they are distinct or come from a specific country). I wish this was a little more upbeat but at least the refrain sticks with you. 3/5

17.  Slovenia Omar Naber "On My Way"  (Did not advance) - Like the Nordic countries, I am always in support of the Balkan countries doing well. And this semifinal didn’t really start well. I don’t really MIND this song (it is a “musical” number so it sticks with you like gum on the bottom of your shoe.) It has the qualities of a Disney protagonist’s “going to get what I want song” but redone by a company ripping off Disney. Poor Slovenia. The text was really bad omgggg. 2/5

18.  Latvia Triana Park "Line"  (Did not advance) - This would have been a decent song if it didn’t sound like you were listening to it through the wall of your neighbour’s apartment. I’m not surprised this didn’t make the finals. I wish they could have brought a little more “power” or something to it. They had potential but potential doesn’t always mean results. 2/5. 

General comments: The stage looks poorly designed to me. The performers look generally uncomfortable with such an expansive space. But we’ll see how Semifinal 2 shapes up....