#and i'm delighted that i'm at a place where i've literally never been fitter
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you think exercising a lot and building a strong body is going to fix your issues but really now i'm just depressed in a body that can bench more
#ignore this this is just interesting to me like#i'm trying to foster body neutrality in that#if i fuel my body it can lift things! it can do press-ups! maybe one day even pull-ups!#and i am lucky that being at an all-women gym means literally every workout i'm surrounded by thE MOST inspiring middle-aged lesbians#squatting 100kg like it's nothing like ma'am your lack of chill your STRENGTH#and i'm delighted that i'm at a place where i've literally never been fitter#but do i still hate myself? i mean yeah#i just do it with bigger more solid thighs#and more confidence that i could carry my partner out of a burning building#anyway body neutrality or whatever but everyone should try lifting#nothing creates more awe in me than the little old french lady who's 70 if she's a day who marches into the gym and starts benching 45kg#or indeed the girl i partnered with yesterday who was like 4'10 and deadlifting 50kg like GIRL#people (wimmin) are inspiring and i hope to be like them one day but more than that i hope to feel genuinely apathetic about my body one da
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