#and right now i'm so far behind with that and dms it's unreal

[austerulous]

My follower count has been creeping up over the past few weeks and I’m starting to feel overwhelmed. This is just a heads-up that another soft-blocking spree is coming.

[neptunetheplanet7]

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞 - 𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐬

DM ME IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE PUT ON THE TAGLIST!!

;mikasa ackerman x fem!lesbian!reader

;modern au, band au

word count: 2.0k

warnings: swearing, fluff if you squint, deep talk with jean

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Hitch dropped you off at home with a loud "Au revoir!" and sped off in her black car while you waved silently.

You couldn't shake the nervous feeling Hitch had left you with. It was reasonable to feel uneasy after a strange encounter like that, but nevertheless, you plastered on a fake smile when you walked inside and saw Eren sprawled on the couch.

He lifted his head from his phone when he noticed your presence. "Y/n, you're back. What did Hitch want?"

Admittedly, you felt bad about never telling your best friend, but it was too late now.

"Nothing much, she just wanted to catch up. Haven't seen her since college," You lied easily as you plopped down in the chair next to the couch. "What's new with you?"

Eren shrugged and looked at his phone. "Just trying to pass the time. Jean's headed to the airport at eight tonight. Hope you're ready to see your girlfriend." He tilted his head back while laughing.

You smacked his forehead and he recoiled in pain. "Ah! What's your problem?" Eren rubbed his forehead with a hard glare aimed at you.

"I don't have a problem, you're just being freakish."

Eren gawked. "No, I'm not! You're the real freak, being you and whatever."

"Oh, good one." You snorted. "Hey, speaking of, where is Jean, anyways?" You furrowed your eyebrows as you glanced around the house.

"You tell me." Eren repeatedly clicked his tongue while turning his attention back on his phone.

"I'll go find him then," you decided. Eren just grunted in response, too immersed with the JAEGER BOMB fan pages he was scrolling through.

You got up from the comfy chair and starting looking around the house for Jean. After your talk with Hitch, you were feeling even more nervous about Mikasa coming home. You desperately needed to talk to someone, even if it wasn't about Hitch. You just needed a good distraction from tonight.

Jean was nowhere to be found on the first floor, so you trudged upstairs in hopes of finding him. You rounded the corner at the top of the stairs, passing Mikasa's dark room, stopping when you heard a quiet string of curses from the hallway bathroom.

"Jean?" You called out hesitantly. Lightly knocking on the bathroom door, you pressed your ear to the wood in hopes of figuring out what the issue was.

"Come in," came Jean's strained voice from the small room. You peeked your head in the doorframe and took note of his frustrated figure.

"What's going on?"

"Who decided it would be a good idea to grow my hair out?" He made furious hand motions at his head.

You let out a chuckle as he angrily tried to comb his hair back. "You did."

He rolled his eyes. "Right. I think I might have to go back in time and slap myself for that one."

Shrugging, you sat on the counter next to the agitated male and crossed your arms. "Just cut it then."

"It's not as simple as that," he sighed. "I like the way it looks long, Marco likes it too. And the fans, you know. Besides, I can't cut it in a fit of rage. I'll end up like you." He snorted after his snide comment.

"That was one time! Besides, that was high school. We all did stupid things back then." You grimaced at the memory.

"Yeah, you were the stupidest. You chopped off all your hair because of something that aggravated you." He pointed his comb at you in a teasing manner.

"A little thing called feelings were aggravating me. At least I can control myself more now." You pushed the comb back at him and poked his shoulder.

"Speaking of which, I'm surprised you didn't lose your shit when I told you guys Mikasa was coming home." He went back to working on his hair.

"Seriously? I made you all clean the whole house. I could barely get through her room yesterday. Wasn't that enough of a reaction?" Your head fell onto the mirror against your back while you laughed bitterly.

"Yeah, I guess it was. I don't know what I expected honestly. I assume you aren't over her?"

"Definitely not." You sighed. "Because it's been two years since I last had any contact with her, you'd honestly think I would've moved on by now."

Jean set his comb at the side of the counter and faced you. "Did you want to move on?"

You fidgeted and looked away from his hard gaze. "It would be best if I did. I had my chance and I never took it. There was always a part of me that knew she'd come back. I had always hoped that she would, I never got to tell her how I felt, but now that it's actually happening it feels almost unreal." You met Jean's eyes and the corners of his mouth twitched up.

"Are you going to confess when she's back?" he inquired.

Your thoughts circled back to Hitch. Her threats were powerful. She knew what she was doing. Maybe you could confess to Mikasa in secret and she would never know. However, she somehow knew about Mikasa's future arrival, so you should play it safe. Plus, you hadn't seen the Mikasa you knew in two years.

"No, I don't think I will. There's so much to know about her now. She could be a completely different person." You pulled your knees to your chest.

Jean put his hands on your shoulders which made you look back up at him. "Y/n, you've been putting this off far too long. She's proven to us that she's not always going to be here. If there's ever a time to tell her, it would be now."

You stared at each other for a few moments before you pursed your lips and looked away. Jean was right. The perfect chance was right in front of you but just out of your reach. There was always an unspoken obstacle when it came to your feelings for Mikasa. Whether it was another person or yourself blocking the way. "I just need some time to think."

Jean took his hands off your shoulders and shook his head. "You, my friend, are what people call hopeless." He picked up the comb again, about to run it through his hair once more, but sighed and placed it in a drawer. "Fuck it, ponytail it is." You found it funny how often he would end up tying his hair in a low ponytail. His hair was long, but it wasn't close to the length Eren's was. Whenever Jean did his hair like that little tufts would stick out at the top of his neck and loose strands would curl around his ears.

"How long are you growing it?" You asked as you let your legs dangle over the countertop.

"I'll grow it until it becomes seriously unmanageable. It's already getting unruly." Jean softly kicked open the door and gestured to the hallway. "After you."

You hopped off the counter and gladly took his offer, sliding your arm along the balcony railing before folding your arms over the wood and resting your head on them. The hallway was only lit up by the orange light from the sunset beyond the large living room windows above the glass doors.

Jean passed by you swiftly, making cool air hit your neck. He loudly trudged down the wooden stairs and you saw him walk into the living room from your view.

Armin was sitting cross legged in the cushy rocking chair and Eren was still taking up the space of the long couch. Their eyes were trained on an ocean documentary, Armin occasionally commenting on the sea life while Eren nodded at him.

Jean sat on the loveseat under the balcony, now hidden from your view. Armin noticed your content gaze and beckoned for you to join them.

You followed Jean's path to the living room and put your hands on the back of the couch he was sitting on.

"What do you guys want for dinner? It's nearly seven o'clock." You asked the seated boys.

"Can we just get Burger King or something again?" Eren tore his eyes away from the screen to look at you pleadingly.

"Eren, we had that yesterday. I don't want it two nights in a row. That's just gross." Armin frowned at his request.

Jean placed his hands behind his head and on top of your hands. "Eat whatever you like. I have to drive to the airport soon." He patted your hands and stood from the couch.

Once Jean left the room you continued your survey. "We could have spaghetti?" You offered.

"That sounds good. I'll help you." Armin started toward the kitchen with you before tugging on Eren's sleeve. "You come too. You've been sitting on that couch all day, you lazy bum."

Eren groaned like a child being asked to do the dishes. "Fine, if I have to."

The three of you started preparing the meal in the kitchen with Armin getting the noodles out and making the meatballs, you making the sauce, and Eren filling the pot with water then leaving the rest to you and Armin.

Eren sat on a kitchen stool and pulled his phone out. You and Armin both gave him an eye roll before continuing your cooking.

It was around seven-thirty when the food was done. There were a few mishaps along the way since Jean wasn't around to help and neither you or Armin were very skilled in culinary practices. But the final product looked edible and that's all that matters.

Eren and Armin got their servings and sat down on the kitchen island stools while you went to close the curtains in living room and the dining area. You then pulled out a stool next to Armin.

The three of you ate in silence for a while before you spoke up. "Jean should be back soon."

Eren perked his head up. "Really? He said he'd get her at eight. He left an hour ago but we all know he likes to be early so who knows," He said.

"I'd give it maybe twenty minutes. Why? You nervous?" Armin twirled the pasta around their fork.

"Incredibly," you exhaled.

Eren snorted. "As expected from you. But if you're nervous, imagine how Jean feels right now. That should perk you right up." he laughed to himself while imagining Jean waiting for Mikasa, a nervous wreck.

"Are you not nervous?" You asked timidly.

Armin shrugged. "I guess I am. We've known her forever. It'll be just like seeing an old college friend. It'll be refreshing to see her after all this time. I'm more worried about how ready the house is," they explained while folding their arms.

"I'm a little nervous. You think she'll like my hair?" Eren gestured to his bun.

"No, you're ugly." Armin commented. You laughed so hard at Eren's shocked face that you didn't hear the door unlocking behind you.

Armin stopped laughing with you and stared at the door. "Mikasa," He whispered.

"Mikasa?" You questioned and looked back at the door. "Mikasa."

Sure enough, Mikasa was at the door with Jean lurking behind her.

She was wearing a black hoodie and sweatpants with dark green sneakers. Her hair was cut much shorter now. It was slightly fluffed up and messy from the plane ride. She had a few rings decorating her fingers and a small tattoo on her middle finger on her right hand. In that hand, she carried a navy blue suitcase. In the other, gripped the same scarf Eren gave her years before. She held a tired expression but you thought she looked beautiful as ever.

Your eyes widened and you parted your lips to say something but nothing would come out.  Instead, you opted for a hug. You wrapped your arms around her waist, your head just peeking over her shoulder, earning a surprised noise from her. Her arms made their way around your frame as she held you close.

"Mikasa," you could only manage to squeak out her name.

posted: 8/27/21

neptunetheplanet7© 2021

no reposts, edits, or modification to my work by anyone other than me.