#anyway currently the first chapter is 5.4k but i still have editing to do so. I didn't think it'd get so long but you're welcome

[beesinspades]

realizing that if I don't finish editing this chapter and get it betaed before friday, it means i will have to post it during my two weeks of catsitting, which means i won't have a promo pic for it 😭

[acerathia]

somebody's watching me || Chapter 5: Bleed

Summary:

Meeting him was your fate, your salvation, and you shall do everything to keep things this way.

Wordcount: 5.4k

Read on AO3 || Masterlist

Pairing:

Getou Suguru / Reader

Tags/CW:

no-curse au, Getou is still a cult-leader, cults, Getou's fake personality, dark content, Major Character Death, Paranoia, schizoid form of anxiety disorder, isolation, overthinking (in connection to the anxiety), some form of descent into madness, violence, stream of consciousness to show the mental state of reader, everything has meaning (dreams, colors, symbols etc.), warped look on reality, dissociation, blind trust, indoctrination, manipulation, mind-altering practices, polarisation of people/society, peer pressure, denial of reality, emotional abuse, body horror, drugs (implied), hallucinations,

Note:

Please be cautious reading this work, as it contains heavy themes, which might affect some people. Minors do not interact!! ignore any editing mistakes, i am tired. have fun, maybe? lol

The next weekend, you stood at the stop, waiting for the bus. You had signed up when you had managed to convince your family. While you didn't really remember how you had managed it, it had worked. The means to a goal shouldn't matter.

The headphones in your ears drowned out the sounds around you. There should be a bus coming soon to pick up the whole group, but you seemed to be a little early. This happened to you often, because you preferred to be at the place before the appointed time than too late. You didn't like having to worry about the time. Even though the empty lot still made you nervous. Were you in the wrong place? Had you gotten the time wrong and were actually late? Your teeth gnawed at your lower lip as you kept glancing right and left. But as some people slowly gathered close by, you were able to breathe a little easier. You still weren’t sure if these people were part of the group, but their equipment seemed to match the ones on the list. Even though you knew you were in the right place, you continued to look around. You only knew the leader, as he had invited you himself, and you kept an eye out for him. He did not seem to have arrived yet. Before he had the opportunity to even arrive, the bus pulled up to the stop. At first, you hesitated to get on. You had not heard any instructions, so you did not know if it would be right to do so. Only the fact that you were standing alone on the street convinced you to enter the bus.

Inside, most of the seats were already occupied. That probably meant that most of the members were already there. You wondered if there was still an empty seat by the window. Your eyes darted back and forth between the backmost and the frontmost seats. But when you spotted the man at the front, you decided to sit there. You even found a seat next to the window. Now you understood why everyone had just gotten on when the bus came. They were probably used to this situation, since the leader probably already was in the bus on these occasions.

You didn't want to disturb the only person you knew, so you didn't dare greet him. Besides, you didn't expect anyone to sit next to you anyway, after all, no one knew you. You had often dealt with similar situations. Still, that didn't mean it hurt any less. You probably would never be able to get rid of this pain completely. You had to admit, you never really understood why people didn't like you very much. No matter how hard you tried to fit in with the outside world. You could tell what people thought of you by simple looks, their facial features. You were getting absolutely tired of not fitting in anywhere, despite your best efforts. You had stopped trying, preferring to isolate yourself rather than be isolated.

You had to force yourself to take a deep breath. The ride hadn't even started and already you hated your current position among the people. And you really shouldn't, not yet. The trip offered itself to you as a chance to get better, to make friends. Even though you carried a bit of hope in your hands, you were aware that you didn't really know how to approach other people.

Your hand searched for your water bottle so you could take a few sips from it. The coolness in your throat helped a little and calmed your nerves. Then you rested your head against the window pane and looked out. You probably wouldn't be able to do anything else before the bus left, and probably not during the trip either.

But before the trip began, you sensed movement in the seat next to you. You wondered whether or not to turn around. Finally, you turned your head slightly and caught the glance of him. Oh, you must have been caught. Still, being able to lock eyes with him made your heart beat in a way, in a way which resembled panic, yet on another level. So, you smiled hesitantly at your neighbor, trying to not let your insides burst out.

For a moment, you didn’t know what to do, his gaze intently on your face, and you were about to turn back to the window, but then he suddenly gave you a small smile, one so unexpected, but one you couldn’t help but admire and cherish. How many other people had ever had this privilege? His whole being seemed to radiate from within with this small gesture and you felt dazzled, overwhelmed. For a moment you wondered why such a luminous person would sit down next to you, talk to you. But you asked no questions and passed your own smile like an anchor, trying to tie yourself helplessly onto his. Maybe this was your chance to get a little bit closer, not more than that.

You really wanted to make it work, but even the first hurdle seemed way too high; what were you going to talk with him about? You had little experience with small talk and social situations. Those memories stuck deep in your chest and knotted your thoughts. Why couldn't you be social? Why were you the way you were now? Something about you was wrong; everything about you was wrong. Your thoughts seemed to be stuck in your head for an eternity and you never came up with a topic. But before you could turn away again, embarrassed, he actually started talking to you, leading the conversation effortlessly. Relief seemed to loosen your muscles. So you at least tried not to make it harder for him than it had to be. While you were better with listening, you kept trying to respond to what he was saying. You hoped that by doing so you would not annoy him away, hoped he would stay by your side.

This way, the beginning of the ride passed. At some point you just let the silence rest between you. You weren’t sure at the beginning if he didn't want to talk to you anymore because he was annoyed and didn't like you. That was why you had given him an uncertain look at first, but he caught it and gifted you with another smile. This reaction calmed your worries and you could just sit with her in peace. Even if his smile laid heavy in your mind. You had to admit, it gave you some sort of weird feeling in your chest, which wouldn't go away, but it was rather pleasant, something else, something he had given you. It felt like he had temporarily freed you, enlightened you.

When the bus finally arrived at its destination, the whole group got off with an excited chatter. You brought up the rear, letting everyone else go ahead. At least that's what you wanted, but he didn't seem to want to leave you alone. Not that you minded, but it was just unexpected.

When you finally stepped onto the grass, you looked around. The bus had stopped in front of a grassy area, with buildings visible in the distance. The grassy landscape seemed familiar in some way, but you couldn't find any real memory of it. Perhaps it was simply déja vu. You could still feel your shoulders getting heavier and your heart wanting to jump out of your throat. But you tried to ignore the feeling and followed the person in front of you. The whole group lined up in a formation on the lawn. You just squeezed in between two people without really understanding what it was supposed to look like. But you didn't ask, you followed the steps of the others. Maybe your questions would be answered by themselves.

Suddenly everyone fell silent and their eyes were fixed on one person in the middle of the formation. You recognized him as the leader, something you were aware of, yet felt so jarring to actually witness. There had to be a lot of respect, otherwise, people wouldn't wait for his words with such silence, would they? You could do nothing but look around curiously, but you seemed to have been caught. The leader had given you a disappointed look and then turned back to the others. Your heart sank and your lungs twisted. Had you done something wrong? You didn't know. Your tongue licked over your lower lip and suddenly it was much harder to swallow. You didn't want to disappoint anyone, but you had done it anyway. Great job. Still, you tried to make an effort and understand his words. Even though your ears were filled with the roar of your pulse. That's why you only heard that everyone should throw their phones, their means of communication into a box. Your concentration should not be averted because of these devices. If this trip was to end successfully, then they could not afford any interference from the outside world.

That made sense. And it didn't bother you. Who would text you anyway? You were not in contact with anyone.That's why you didn't mind turning off your phone and putting it in the box. If the leader thought it would be better for you, he was probably right.

After all the devices were collected, everyone headed for the buildings. As they did so, the group split in half, and you had no idea what the requirements were to enter one or the other. At the same time, you wondered if the entry into the other buildings was restricted in some way. You wanted to run into each one and discover its insides. Curiosity stung your neck like a bee, but you pulled yourself together and followed the bigger group into the dormitory. Still, you tried to peer into the windows, hoping to see something, but the interior was far too dark for that.

Once inside, you stood uncertainly at the doorstep. You didn't know where you could get comfortable, and you didn't dare ask. Even though you probably wouldn't have gotten a word out as invisible claws squeezed your throat shut. Your gaze darted quickly back and forth. Everyone seemed to have a fixed place. You knew it, you shouldn't have come here. You didn't belong and never would. Your hand went to your throat, and your fingers scratched at the skin there. You hated this feeling. But you couldn't help it either, no one knew you, let alone liked you. You wanted to get away from this place as soon as possible.

But before you could just run out of the building, a girl beckoned you over. With slow steps you approached her. Wondering what she wanted to say. But she didn't say anything, rather showed you a free bed, which was at the end of the room. Was this one for newcomers? Or was it simply empty? Before you could ask that question, the girl was back at her bedside, too far away. You probably wouldn't find out now. Not that it would have made any difference. So you just smiled at the girl as she looked back at you. Then you followed the others and packed your most important things into the chest at the end of the bed. There was no lock, so you hoped you could trust these strangers. After all, you had no other choice. Then you sat down on the bed, not knowing what to do. The time between now and dinner was probably a break for everyone. The people talked to each other in a gentle tone instead of leaving the cabin again. Everyone seemed to know each other already and you wondered if you should introduce yourself to a group. But just the thought of it made your jaw tighten and your teeth grind. You were afraid of people's disgusted looks or their nose wrinkling. You preferred to be alone by choice rather than excluded. Even if you fervently wished someone would approach you first. But you knew that probability was slim, equal to impossible. You shook your head slightly and crossed your arms. Wondering why you still had those hopes in the first place.

You were about to drop backwards onto the bed, but the leader called to you from the door. Your heart sped up and you felt the need to immediately run outside. But you also didn't want to make a bad impression or disappoint him. So you left the building with slow and calculated steps and followed the leader into his office. The door closed behind you and suddenly you found it hard to breathe at the mere sight of him. So you sat down eagerly when he instructed you to do so.Then he handed you a bowl of candy, one of which you placed on your tongue if only to do what he wanted you to. Your eyes landed on anything but always returned to his face. But for some reason, the atmosphere differed from the one you had experienced on the way here. So you just kept silent and waited for him to address you first.

"I'm disappointed in you."

All your muscles froze on the spot. You didn't remember doing anything. What could have triggered that reaction? Did you make a bad first impression? This thought constricted your throat and you didn't dare say anything. Not even an apology crossed your lips.

But then he continued talking, and even though you wanted to just flee the room, you listened to him. He told you that he understood your situation, but it was no excuse for your behavior.You should have read the rules.

You frowned at this lecture. You didn't remember breaking any rule. Was it perhaps because of the formation? Because you didn't know where to stand? But you had not heard or read anything about it. Where would you have gotten that information? But he was right. It was your fault. After all, you should have asked. Therefore, you apologized in a croaky voice. At these words, the leader nodded, seeming more satisfied than understanding. Nevertheless, he leaned forward to put a hand on your shoulder. You did not like that. The warmth of his skin was something you should gain, something akin to a reward, yet here you are, enjoying it despite this.

"I’m just here to help you. This is all for your own good."

That was his promise to you, belonging and help. As the words slowly swam through your skull, you definitely felt calmer. It was true. He was only trying to help you, there was nothing to worry about. You felt warm with joy at his attention towards you. Someone was taking care of you! Your head seemed to become light. All at once the disappointment of the leader was forgotten and you had to grin to yourself. Only one thought filled your head: he wanted your best!

You didn't even realize that you were still being punished. At that moment, everything was fine with you. Your body felt like clouds and your fingers were tingling. Without understanding a word, you gave your consent to whatever task he gave you with a nod. How beautiful everything was right now.

You didn't realize you were dismissed until the leader escorted you to the door with his hand on your shoulder. With a final grin, you trundled back toward the dorm on wobbly legs. Your vision seemed to flutter and you had to hold onto the wall to keep from tripping over your own feet. You should have thought something of it, but at the moment your body felt pleasantly warm and all sounds were muffled. You had to pull yourself together to avoid attracting attention. After the situation, you didn't want him to change his mind too much. But something inside you claimed he would never be disappointed with you, he liked you, truly. However, how long would your mistakes be considered a rookie mistake?

No. You shook your head and almost fell over. You couldn't break any more rules.So, you made your way back to your assigned place. But before you even got to the building, someone gently grabbed you by the shoulder.With a silent protest, you swayed and turned around to face a woman. She apologized for having startled you, for having forgotten you. Forgotten for what? But instead of answering your questioning look, a hand was held out to you. With a trembling hand you grabbed it and let yourself be led out of the building. The woman's skin was soft and the touch did not bother you, unlike many others.

But it couldn't be that it was already time for dinner, could it? Your question was answered when you stepped into a meadow instead and walked through the grass. The walk seemed to be a bit longer, because the woman opened up a little conversation with you. Asked you how you liked it so far and how you were getting along. The grass of the meadow tickled your ankles and you felt as if you had been here before. But when you had to dodge a bush, you denied the thought. After all, this was your first trip to this place.

After a while under the evening sun, they finally arrived. For what, actually? All you caught sight of was a line of people. You wanted to run forward, stretching to see what was happening there. But you were nefariously pulled to the end of the line because the woman had not let go of your hand. Only when you had your hand back to yourself did you gather your courage and ask the kind woman why they were all standing in line. She answered with a gentle smile and a single sentence:

"It's a tradition.Everyone is supposed to show how selfless they can be."

These words only raised more questions. However, you let your thoughts rest with the answer and simply thanked the woman. This one seemed to know just like everyone else what was going on. You tried to see what was happening with each step forward. Your head swung from side to side to get a glimpse of the situation. But your attempts were unsuccessful. That meant you would have to wait for your own turn. Still, you wondered where they went then, since you didn't see anyone walking back.

Finally it was your turn. In the middle of the meadow was a lonely chair full of moss. Around it were towers of smaller stones, forming a circle. Someone tapped their fingers invitingly against the large backrest. Hopefully this chair would not collapse under you. Hesitantly, you sat down, but did not shift your weight completely onto the wood beneath you. The people around you motioned for you to roll up your sleeve, which you did without argument. Secretly, you continued to hope for an explanation, but it didn't seem to be coming. Instead, noise-proof headphones were slipped over your ears, from which music flowed. If you concentrated, however, you could hear the murmuring sounds in the background. But you felt a fatigue that made it difficult for you to resist. Still, you noticed your arms being pinned to the armrests until you could no longer move them. You wanted to protest, but your tongue felt far too soft, like it was about to slip out of your mouth. You only managed a frown to show your feelings. At first you let these things happen to you, but when a syringe was unwrapped from a plastic bag, you began to shake your head. You didn't know what these people were going to do with the syringe, but you didn't feel the need to find out either. Someone seemed to recognize your distress and began stroking your neck with their fingers. This motion did not help you calm down, but distracted you enough to not stir for a moment. At that instance, they jabbed you in the crook of your arm with the needle. Your gaze fixed on the syringe as it filled up. The tension in your body made it painful to draw blood.

Only when the vessel had filled completely with blood were the headphones and restraints removed. With a jerk you stood up and moved a few steps away from the chair. Then you demanded an explanation in a trembling voice. The blood was still flowing in drops down your arm, but you didn't care. Someone apologized and said they thought you already knew about the procedure. Just having blood drawn, for some reason. If they thought you knew about the whole thing, then surely they didn't have to chain you up. Still, you nodded, as if showing understanding. You were handed another candy before being escorted in a different direction than the one you had come from.

There, the next activity was to take place as a group, as there was still plenty of time before dinner. So, you set off without argument until you stopped in front of a pond. The whole place could have been out of a fairy tale if there were no garlic hanging from the branches of the trees. You wondered what they were placed here for. But you questioned nothing and sat down at a free table to join a group. After all, it was none of your business as long as these things promoted the welfare of you and others.

By the time you sat down, no one else joined. It seemed that you were the last, except for the missing leader. Even though he had been missing from the last activity too.

But the wait was not spent in complete silence and the mood lapsed into relaxed conversation. Everyone was sharing stories about their lives. At first, you didn't really plan to participate in any, but the girl from earlier found you and pulled you into a conversation. They talked about whether they could fulfill their goals at the end of the trip. Since you assumed they all had goals similar to yours, you agreed to the discussion. Then the conversation went in a completely different direction.

It took a while for him to arrive at the meeting. With his appearance, congratulations and laughter were exchanged. Were they congratulated because of the successful activity? This group was strengthened as a community in several ways thanks to this social time. People's eyes darted back and forth between themselves and the garlic above their heads.

The leader then got up on a podium to look over everyone. Then he began to murmur some words that were unfamiliar to you. Was it a song? The chant hummed throughout the group and you shivered. Your back went cold and you looked around. Everyone's eyes were fixed on the taller person in front of them. As if there had been an agreement, they all raised their hands above their faces and formed a sign in front of it, their fingers intertwined. This one seemed familiar to you, as goosebumps formed on the back of your neck and you had to swallow hard to keep your mind from wandering. You didn't want to stand out, didn't want to disappoint anyone, so you copied the gesture from a seatmate.

The moment you put your hands in front of your face, everyone fell to their knees with a jerk. With a faltering breath, you also let yourself slide out of the seat. Even though your fingers restricted your vision, you recognized how he swung his arm around in a sweeping motion and everyone sat back down as if on command.

Hands were separated again and gazes locked on the leader without blinking. An eerie silence settled over the clearing. One could feel the tension in the muscles of the others. They didn't even dare to breathe, afraid it would be too loud. Only a deep breath from the leader could be heard.

"My dear companions in this finite life, We are fortunate to be gathered here again.Together. Many who walk this earth with us do not know of the possibilities. The opportunities that have now opened up to us.

Everyone has the potential to take advantage of this opportunity to contribute something greater to our society.

In the past, I could only rely on myself.The people around me didn't understand my thoughts.This led society to unconsciously prepare me to be alone. Alone, as we all were!

But that is not how people should live. We should exist in each other's arms. We fight for each other, for being together.

We must not let society put us in a box. Everyone deserves independence, yes, but also charity, an infinite life.

What good is independence if you are alone for all eternity? None of us wants to be alone and we will find a solution. A solution of how we can hold hands forever.

Each of us came to this place emaciated from the withdrawal of love, of kindness. Oh yes, I remember each person's arrival, hold it in my heart as a warning. As a warning of what this world will do to us.

But don't worry, friends, we are fortunate enough to form our own society. A society that will be enlivened and loved by us until the end of time.

Be full of gratitude, be full of hope. For this weekend will belong to us and our purpose."

Your heart seemed to have longed for these words, for it understood everything without faltering. You almost had tears of joy; these people really understood what was going on inside you. At last you belonged in a place without prejudice, only with goodwill. You wanted to show your gratitude, with great signs and deeds, but for now you just clapped as loud as you could with the others. You would reach your goal, everyone would reach their goals. And you could even be helpful to the others.The next few days were full of possibilities and you would not let a single one slip from your fingers, from your heart.

After the applause stopped, it was time for dinner. No one seemed to be in a hurry and everyone strolled leisurely toward the dining hall. The excitement after the speech filled the air and intensified with each breath. Your body was still humming as well and you couldn't help the smile on your face. Everyone seemed to feel the same way, as they grinned at your, at each other, sometimes even linking their arms together. Slowly but surely, joy settled in your bones and grounded you like never before. You knew with certainty that the next few days would be the best of your life. Because being around people who were fighting for the same thing had a healing, calming effect.

With a warm feeling in your stomach, you entered the dining room. This time you knew exactly where you belonged and at which table to sit. With that certainty, you made your way toward the table that was furthest away from the leaders table. If you wanted to work your way up, you had to show yourself worthy. You had to make a big contribution to society in order to get up there as quickly as possible. While you still had no idea how to go about it, you knew you could do it. No matter what you would have to do to get there.

With a soft noise, you dropped into the chair and smiled at the others around the table. You didn't know anyone, as the only person you truly knew, and desired to be in the presence, sat at the front. You deserved it, but you would all too like to know what you had done to get closer to him. Money probably played a role too, but you were still a student, you owned next to nothing. No assets.Nothing valuable. That meant you just had to do the best work you had ever done in your life. Maybe you could help out a little in the kitchen, that might earn you some points. You wondered if you were allowed to do more, to serve him directly, in any way you could. You would ask that first thing in the morning.

The meal was dished up. It consisted of pies. With great joy you wanted to grab a piece, but you held back at the very last moment. Your eyes darted to the leader who had not yet touched his food. Then he opened the meal by handing the one serving him a pie to bite into. Only then did you grab a piece as well and let your teeth sink into the dough. The salty filling flowed with pleasure over your tongue and you closed your eyes. A metallic taste lurked in the back of your throat, but you felt too hungry to deal with the aftertaste. Still, you noticed that the pie was starting to drip from the other side. With your free hand, you caught a few drops. These shimmered dark red on your skin. All at once, the aftertaste became much more prominent and you could no longer taste anything else. Where did this blood come from? Was the filling raw meat? No, it tasted too good for that. Your eyes twitched left and right, looking for a reaction from the others. But no one seemed to notice anything. So you swallowed the mass without a word.

Your hand reached for the cup to your right to rid yourself of the taste. But the red color stung your eyes. Was this wine? Was it allowed to serve such a thing at such an event? You sniffed it. The smell was fruity, bitter. Was it supposed to smell like that? You didn't know, but took a sip anyway and let it flow into your mouth. It was just grape juice. A strangely bitter one, but grape juice, no doubt. The taste was familiar to you. Was the leader's tea made from the same grapes? You would have to check to see if anything was planted here. Then you put a hand on the edge of the plate to push it away from you. But before you could do that, a bright scream rang out from the front tables.

He had thrown a glass at some poor guy's head. The glass shattered over his skull and the flowing blood caused a reaction from the crowd. Only for a moment, though. They reacted more to the leader's tirade. At first, someone close by tried to calm him down and handle the situation with a cool head, but the leader's violence did not allow them to act. His words were meant to be instructive, and slowly insults began to flow in. These were harsh and would have probably hit anyone deep in the soul.

After blowing off all his steam, he could finally be calmed down. But after the situation, he didn't want to appreciate or acknowledge the person. You couldn't see it that well from where you were sitting, but the ground was swimming in the man's blood. Was no one going to help him with his wound? Everyone continued their meal as if nothing had happened. No reactions, no protests. Understandable. After all, they would have the chance to take his place when he disappeared. No one wanted to miss that chance. You watched as the man was grabbed by the arms by his seatmates and dragged out of the hall; leaving a red trail behind him. With unobtrusive movements, as if you had never stopped, you began to eat again. With each bite, the taste became more persistent and the juice didn't manage to cover it either towards the end.

After a while a bell sounded and everyone dropped everything from their hands. With a jerk they stood up, whether one had finished eating or not. When the leader was finished, then further eating was not allowed.

People formed a line to the dish rack to wash their silverware. With each step, you followed the others to familiarize yourself with the group's habits. Still, you wondered why people then went back to the rooms. You felt it was much too early to go back to sleep. But you seemed to be wrong about that, because after a few minutes you were lying in your bed, among the other people in a darkened dorm. You didn't think you would be so tired, but something made your head feel heavier and you couldn't help but fall asleep.

[kweebtrash]

Greedy (M)

Sexual Liberation Ch 5-Kino/Hui

Pairings: Hui/Kino/Hongseok/E’Dawn x Reader/OC

Features Full Sex Scenes with: Hui, Hongseok, Kino, E’Dawn, Hyuna

Genre: College AU, Heavy Smut

Summary: College is about experimentation, being free, and having no strings attached fun. Hui, Kino, And E’Dawn have messed around with their best friend ever since last spring. Now that summer is over and they’re back in America, their sexual antics have intensified especially when everyone starts catching feelings. Throw Hongseok into the mix and it creates a swirling mess of emotions and an ultimate decision that might hurt everyone.

Warning: 

Features: threesomes, anal, public sex

Word Count: 5.4k

A/N: I sometimes flipflop between stage names and real names. italics are for past events. Updated edits are done for this chapter! Enjoy.

Sexual Liberation Masterlist

____

“Um...hey…” I swallowed hard, my throat still dry from sleep and nervousness building. “What’s everybody doing here?”

“Well we live here so….” Kino took a bite of the cereal from the bowl he was holding. “What are you doing here...in Hui’s room?” He asked with his mouth full.

I adjusted the scarf around my neck. “I need to get to class.”

“Oh, honey, it’s 8 at night.” Hui came over to me and smoothed out my bedhead. “You were so tired I didn’t want to wake you up.”

“HUI! I needed to go to class! It’s my dance class! My professor is going to kill me.” I groaned.

Hui wrapped his arms around me. “Sometimes you have to put yourself first. I’m glad that you slept in. Do you want to hang with us? I was just about to kick Hongseok’s butt in Mario Kart.”

Hongseok looked up quickly when he heard his name. His eyes caught mine for a second before darting over to Hui’s. “It’s hilarious that you think you’re that talented. Stick to singing.”

Time had passed and there was no reason for me to fuss over something I couldn’t go back and fix. I would just have to get chewed out next class. I needed to focus on what was going on currently- me being an animal trapped in a cage surrounded by the men that made my mind, body, and soul go crazy. Their curious stares were still kicking my nerves into overdrive and I wanted to shift the attention back to their brotherly banter. I patted Hui’s chest and sighed. “He’s right, Hui. You couldn’t beat anyone at Mario Kart. You’re always last place.” I teased. He made an adorable pout and whined at me for taking Hongseok’s side.“Besides, everyone knows that I’m the champ and no one has beaten my streak yet.”

Hyojong looked straight at me and had the audacity to final utter any communication my way. “Why don’t you put your money where your mouth is?” That was all he had to say? My brows furrowed in anger.

“Why don’t you learn how to text people instead of just using them?” I spat back at him.

Hongseok traded glances between Hyo and I, a look of confusion on his face. “Am I missing something?” 

“No,” Hyojong replied. “It’s nothing at all.” He avoided looking at me now as my eyes were filled with hurt and bitterness.“

Hongseok seemed to take that answer though he was still unsure of the whole situation and I wanted to keep it that way. He rubbed the back of his neck and chuckled nervously. “Well, you’re more than welcome to stay and play with us.”

I shook my head. “No, I wish I could but I should really get back to my dorm.” That was my blatant excuse for not wanting to be surrounded by the men I fucked and the one I wanted to fuck but couldn’t. “I've got a lot of things to catch up on.”

Hui rubbed my back gently, his overbearing nature poking through. “Do you want me to walk you back?”

“I’ll be okay, don’t worry about me.” I kissed his cheek before grabbing my backpack and dealing with the awkwardness of goodbyes. Seeing Hyo again really hurt, especially since he hadn’t even acknowledged me in class and his only words to me now were related to a game. It was too casual and felt like he didn’t give a damn about me at all. I couldn’t deal with it all at once. I was halfway down the hall when I felt a presence appear beside me. I glanced over and saw the devil himself which made me roll my eyes.

“Hey.” he said rather softly. I didn’t answer him and continued walking, increasing my speed a little. That didn’t deter him and he stayed quick on my heels. “They caught me up on what's going on with you.”

My jaw set in anger. “Nothing is going on with me. You’re the one that forgot we were friends and didn’t bother to talk to me all summer. Now we’re stuck in the same class and working on a stupid project together. I know where I stand with you, Hyo.”

“No, I don’t think you do but you sure seemed to have gotten back on track with Kino and Hui.” He quipped.

I stopped and whipped around, almost crashing into him. “Hui knows how to treat people kindly and is working towards rebuilding our friendship. I wouldn’t say I’m back on track with Kino just because we slept together. He’s still an asshole but you’re an even BIGGER asshole!”

“I am not an asshole. I was busy and I’m sorry that my life didn’t revolve around answering you back. I don’t want us to be fighting, ok? I do want us to be friends again. I don’t want you to think that you aren’t important to me because you are. It was a bit hectic back home.” 

“If you want to be friends so bad then start acting like it and stop acting like I’m an inconvenience.”.

He slipped his e-cig out of his pocket and took a deep drag off it. He exhaled slowly, the smoke pouring out of his nose and mouth. “I’m sorry. Things were...they weren’t easy for me to deal with when I went back. A lot of stuff went on that I can’t exactly talk about.”

I scoffed and rolled my eyes. “i'm glad everyone has excuses.”

“Look,” He took another drag. “I’m ready to move on with you. We have good chemistry; musically, sexually, platonically. I know i messed up but would you please give me another chance?” 

That was a difficult decision. The rationality in my brain was telling me that I shouldn’t give in a third time but my heart and body wanted to fall into his trap. He was also right in some ways. When we made music together it was amazing. Our raps were pristine and his beats showcased how much of a genius he was. I loved the way we sounded. Avoiding him was going to be almost impossible with this project. I dreaded us working together but parts of me were still excited to spend time with him. I was basically defeated in the war against myself

“We'll work together for the sake of the grade, ok?” I stated, deciding that was the best solution I could come up with for now. I would try my damndest to not let it go further than that but there were no guarantees. ‘But once someone hurts me I'm not quick to trust them again.”

Hyojong took my hand in his and placed a kiss on my knuckles. “I’ll work hard, on the project and on getting you to trust me again. I promise.”

“Yeah, yeah….” I sighed and gave his hand a small squeeze before resuming my walk. He kept my hand in his and stayed beside me. “We can set up a day to work on it. Oh, I just thought of something. Have you heard from the others? Yuto, Shinwon, Yeo One, you know?” Our friends had returned back to their home countries once the spring semester was over. My conversations with them were sporadic at best due to the time difference but I was at least able to stay in contact with them.

Hyojong nodded and explained that he had classes with a few of them. There were fortunately gaps of time where we could band together and have lunch or practice which i was ecstatic about. “I'll make a group chat in Line for us and invite you.”

I smiled. “That sounds good. I can’t wait to talk to them. Yanan told me he’s been really sick ever since he got back to China and almost didn’t make it back for this semester. I checked in on him a few times but I still want to see him.”

Hyo nodded and stopped as we arrived at my dorm. We stood in front of the large glass doors, readying our goodbyes. “I’ll set it up tonight, ok?” He promised.

I nodded and pulled my keycard out of my backpack. “I'll probably be up all night since i took that nap but what else is new. My sleep schedule is always shit. Dance club is tomorrow too and hip hop club is the day after. I'll just die, it's fine.”

He chuckled. “You wont die. Just don’t wear yourself out so much. I don’t want you to get sick.”

“Is this you trying to care about me?”

He stepped closer so that our bodies were almost touching. “I'll always care about you, dumbass.” He took another drag and before I could even retort, his slender fingers wrapped around my chin and pulled me to his lips. He shared the smoke between us in a small stream, reminiscent of our first hookup. It still made my knees weak as did his slow kiss that followed. I pushed him away gently.

“D-don't do that.”

“Why?” He whispered in a seductive voice that was dangerously enticing. He knew exactly why he shouldn’t do such a thing but decided to tease me anyway. 

I swallowed hard. “You'll make me want to take you upstairs and do bad things to you.” I admitted.

“I like bad things. I especially like when you do them to me.” He tried to give me another kiss but managed to jerk my head away quickly.

“No! No.” I commanded both myself and Hyo. “I'm going upstairs now. Away from you. Go home, E'Dawn.” I swiped my card in quickly, not giving him a chance to protest or worse- seduce me, and ran through the doors getting away from him before i ripped his clothes off and fucked him hard.

____

Later on that evening, I was bent over my laptop typing up some parts of my research paper. My roommate was asleep and I was trying not to disturb her. Our room lights remained off and I was left to strain my eyes against the minimal light of my screen. Suddenly, my phone vibrated beside me and I saw chat bubbles pop onto the screen. Hyo was adding every one to the group chat as he said he would. It was slow going at first, as expected since it was late at night, but soon enough a few of them started to respond. Each time I got a new notification it was a moment of saving grace. My brain was starting to fry after working on this stupid paper for so long and I was only five pages in.

Another vibration signaled a new chat altogether. I recognized the tiny profile pic as Hongseok and my heart skipped a bit. Holy shit, what was I going to do?! Of course I accepted his request but I was nervous and unaware of what I should actually say.

Hongseok: Hi :)

uh, hey. How are you?

Hongseok: I’m good, what are you still doing awake?!

I cant really sleep now after that giant ‘nap’ i took this afternoon so I’m working on my paper. What r u still doing up?

Hongseok: Studying:( i have a test in two days and im worried i will fail.

He seemed so proper when he texted. I didn't want to look like a complete illiterate fool.

What class is it for?

Hongseok: History of European Music. It's kind of boring, ha ha.

I took that class. I think i still have my notes from it. Do you want to take a look at them? Also do you always type like that?

It felt weird for me to text so grammatically correct.

Hongseok: Like what?

Like all perfect with your grammar and everything.

Hongseok:  Oh, sorry. It just helps me keep up with my English. Sometimes I can be a bit rusty.

Oh, I see! I was just wondering. it’s kind of cute...

I hit send before I could take it back and internally hit myself. I wasn’t supposed to do that. I wasn’t supposed to flirt with him. Would he even see it as flirting? He didn’t respond for awhile and I started to panic, thinking that I had somehow offended him. I flopped back onto my bed, trying not to check my phone every so often but ultimately failing. Still nothing had come through so I decided to try and get back to my paper. I made it about three more paragraphs before my phone finally vibrated again. I scooped it up quickly and smiled when I saw his name pop up again.

Hongseok: Sorry, i was showering. But if you’d like we could try meeting tomorrow?

Ok, so he didn’t completely sound upset that i called him cute. It wasn't entirely an accident that I called him cute but him ignoring the comment in general was a little heart breaking.

Sure. I can meet you somewhere. I get out of class around 2?

Hongseok: Two works for me. Is the library, ok? We can go back to the top floor. 

Oh lord...the library.

Yep! That sounds good.

Hongseok: Amazing. Have a great night :)

That seemed to be the end of our conversation which also disappointed me. I didn’t know what exactly I wanted the outcome to be of our talk but at least we were getting somewhere as friends. A study session would be fine as a first hang out. I just had to keep telling myself that it was purely platonic.

_____

I sat uncomfortably staring at the table that I had been fucked on just a few days before. The ache in my hips was just starting to go away but the urge to feel Kino again seemed to be coming back. My mind swirled with memories of being bent over and feeling Kino’s cock relentlessly fill me. It was the most perfect sensation and- my thoughts were cut short when I heard a voice coming nearer.

“Sorry, i’m late.” Hongseok huffed as he pulled back the seat beside me and sat down. “My vocal lesson ran over and I rushed here are fast as I could. I didn’t want you to think I had forgotten about you.”

I cleared my throat and tried not to be too obvious in my blushing. I didn’t think I could ever be mad at him even if he was late. I didn’t mind at all and I was definitely grateful for the distraction from my barrage of Kino thoughts. “You didn’t have to rush. I was totally fine with waiting. I haven’t really been here that long anyway.” I pulled out my tattered spiral notebook from my backpack and set it between us. “Sorry it’s a little torn up but the notes should still be fine. If you need help studying i got you. I got a B.”

He chuckled and smiled that perfectly stunning smile at me. “I might take you up on that offer. I don’t know why I can’t seem to grasp any of the concepts. Maybe I’ve just been distracted or something.”

“Distracted?” I asked. “By what?”

Hongseok avoided me and instead looked down at my notebook, flipping through some of the pages. “Um...I’m not sure. Maybe just all the TA stuff…”

“Yeah, you do have a lot on your plate. But you’ll make it. I know you will.” I smiled at him and scooted my chair a little closer. “Here, what Unit are you on? I should remember most of what we discussed. Tell me what you need help with.”

Hongseok licked his lips and rubbed this palms over his thighs. I noticed our knees had touched briefly when I moved in closer but I didn’t really think much of it. What I did notice was the faint smell of his cologne lingering on the collar of his shirt, the same he had worn when we first met at the library. It was the perfect scent to get wrapped up in. I realized that he hadn’t said anything then and wondered if he had even heard me. “Hongseok?”

“Oh, right, yes!” He seemed to have snapped himself out of whatever distraction was capturing his attention. “So, I’m having trouble with this.”

We sat huddled together for hours as I explained whatever I could remember from the course. Every once in awhile i would catch him staring at me and I didn’t know what to make of it. I was over thinking about what I felt made me unattractive, wondering if that was why he was staring so much. I questioned if my breath stunk, if i needed more deodorant, if my hair was turning into a mess. I had been twirling it in my fingers it in for awhile now and had probably made everything frizzy. However, in the midst of studying, or conversations started veering which provided me a bit of relief. Questions about music class switched to comparisons of Avenger superheroes. He was such an Ironman fanboy and I argued that Hulk and Thor were much better. He said that I only liked them because Mark Ruffalo and Chris Hemsworth were attractive and I had to school him in my knowledge of comics. It only made him laugh and smile more which made my body seem like it was radiating warmth. That laugh was infectious and made my insides bubble with excitement. I didn’t want anything to end with him but soon after Hongseok noticed the time on his watch.

“I would love to stay and talk to you more but I’ve got to get going. I have one more class coming up in a few minutes.” He stood up and gathered the notes we worked on and stuffed them into his backpack. “It was um...” He swallowed hard. “I had a really nice time with you. Would you want to maybe help me study again sometime?”

I agreed a little too quickly, absolutely ecstatic that he wanted to hang out again. “Yeah, of course! I would love to. Just let me know when you’re free next.” Could I sound any more thirsty?

“Will do.” He gave me one last smile before getting up from his seat and heading over to the elevator. I stood behind and set my head on the table once he disappeared. Why was he so damn beautiful? I guess I was a masochist because I loved just piling on one exchange student after the other to make my life a living hell. I was also becoming a pathological liar to myself. No matter how many times I told myself not to get involved with anyone else I would still go and do it. Sometimes I wondered why I was trying to get my Bachelor’s Degree in music when I could just get it in “Roping Gorgeous Men into My Life that I Don’t Need” Studies. Tuition was free and I was already getting stellar grades.

____

I stood face to face with the bane of my existence, staring him down as i was ready to destroy his ego little by little. Our groups had been chosen by our dance club to do the usual after-lesson battle. We were the leaders and I was determined to have my girls go harder than ever. I wanted to drop him down a few pegs and remind him that he was nothing to me (no matter how much of a lie that was). I squatted down to stretch out my hamstrings and popped my gum obnoxiously. “Try not to get a boner, Kino. It’s just a dance battle.” i teased. 

“Try not to squirt all over the floor this time.” he spat back with a wink. I rolled my eyes at him and scoffed.

“Pig!” My teammate shouted to him.

“Shut it and pick.” He rolled his eyes and gestured towards the coin we had to make the decision for us. “Heads or tails.”

“Oh, we don’t need to pick.” We’ll go first. Song is ‘Swalla’. Watch and learn boys.” I said.

He scoffed. “Boring and overplayed.”

I ignored him as our fellow club member started the song. Room was made for the dancers and we settled into our beginning moves. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Hui within the crowd. I hadn’t expected him to come but he was already clapping and cheering in excitement. It made me smile and become much more confident as I landed each body roll and pop. Kino was quick to retaliate with his own teasing moves that were a bit sharper than mine. He worked his way over to me, adding a few body rolls of his own while lifting his shirt and sticking his tongue out. I wanted to roll my eyes into the next century at his fuckboy ways.

Oh so you want to play dirty then?

When our team switched turns i danced closer to Kino, bouncing my ass and dropping low into a split, which got a lot of cheers from the crowd. I danced my way back up to my feet and bent over at my waist, shaking my ass a little more. The rules were that the teams couldn’t touch each other while dancing but we could sure as hell gets as close as we could. I could tell he probably wanted to smack my ass to get me to move away but had to be a good boy. I looked out into the crowd and saw Hui biting his lip. He probably just came here to see my ass move, that pervert. I pushed my hair back and ran my tongue against my lips, smirking because I knew we had won.

Kino took his last chance to tease me. He got close to me too, rolling his body and biting his lip as his teammates battled with mine. I wanted to push him away but also i wanted to wipe that smug look on his face by winning. The song ended and the jury went to the crowd. I gave a little wave to Hui who had his hands suspiciously covering the front of his jeans. He only smiled at me in acknowledgement.

My team was announced as the winner and I stuck my tongue out at Kino who had to swallow his crushing defeat. Our club president got everyone’s attention and announced that time was up. We were already running a little bit over and had to wrap up quickly. I went to my gymbag and pulled my crop hoodie off. I grabbed my towel and dabbed at the sweat on my forehead and neck.

Out of the corner of my eyes I saw Kino toss a bottle of water at me. I caught it and twisted it open, taking long, fast gulps. “You were ok, I guess. You rely on your fat ass too much.” Kino quipped. Hui came up to us quickly.

“Don’t insult her like that.”

I chuckled. “Don’t worry Hui, Kino likes it too he just won't admit it.” I felt Hui’s hand outline the curve of my ass. “Hwitaek, is that your way of flirting?”

He blushed and moved his hand. “Sorry.”

Kino looked around as the room was mostly empty now. He and Hui exchanged a suspicious look. “What?” i asked sternly, knowing they were up to something.

“Nothing...nothing.”Hui said.

“Ya'll are weird. Goodbye.”i grabbed my stuff and exited the dance room. It was pretty dark out and the way back to my dorm wasn't really illuminated enough. I hated coming this way, even with the short cut but i did it for dance. I adjusted my gymbag on my shoulder and browsed through my phone. I was hoping someone had posted a video of my team's dance so i could see how well i did. I was scrolling through our dance clubs instagram when i heard a crunch behind me. It sounded like a twig snapping. I swiveled around like an owl, trying to find out where the sound was coming from. But no one was behind me. I swallowed hard and started walking a little faster.

I could still hear the crunching behind me and i was ready to start running when i felt someone grab me. I tried to scream but my mouth was covered. I was picked up and taken into the more densely tree packed area, towards the back of the dance building. I tried squirming and wiggling my way free when i was suddenly let go and pushed up against the dance building.

“Did we scare you?” Kino laughed.

“I told you you shouldn’t have done that! She’s gonna kick your ass and I’m gonna laugh and watch.” Hui added.

I growled. “If you ever...EVER pull that shit again I will end you.”

Hui pulled me closer to him. “I’m sorry baby. I wouldn’t let him really hurt you.” He kissed my cheek gently.

“Ahh, c’mon, what’s a little fun?” Kino rubbed my hips gently. “Besides it was Hui’s idea to do something a little...public.”

I glared at Hui who held up his hand in defense. “I just- i mean i thought- i just wanted to…”

“He was just so turned on by the way you shook your ass.” Kino whispered in my ear. “And maybe i was too.”

Hui stepped closer and rubbed my thighs. “We couldn’t help ourselves, baby.” He placed a kiss flush against my lips. “Can we show you how much we enjoyed your dance?”

“I’m hot and sweaty and angry.” I said sharply. “What makes you think that I want to fuck outside in this woodsy ass shit behind this danky building? Hmm?”

“Maybe not, but we think you’d want to be filled and cum so hard you see stars.” Kino licked the shell of my ear and nibbled slightly..

“And you’d know that if i’m on my knees I’d do anything you’d like.” Hui said lowering himself down to his knees in front of me.

God, he looked so good down there. He was already sliding my leggings down my thighs, kissing them as they became exposed.  I was still mad as hell but Hui loved kissing every inch of my skin and had in fact spent hours doing it once until it lulled me to sleep. I wanted to curse him for exciting every nerve inside me. Kino was already shoving his hands beneath the band of my sports bra, pushing it up and over my breasts so he could cup them. The chilly night air hit my heated skin, making me shiver.

Hui took off my sneakers and made me step out of my leggings. His lips went to my center, kissing and nibbling at the fabric of my thong.

“Hyung, get her against the wall.” Kino commanded. Hui stood up and tossed his jacket aside before pressing me to the cold concrete. I pulled my sports bra up and over my head, tossing it by my gymbag.

“Don’t make me wait so long. You’ve both already pissed me off.”

Hui reached into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. He tossed something to Kino and tore at a small packet between his teeth. He spit away the part he ripped off and Kino pulled my thong down quickly. Hui’s fingers slipped between my cheeks and i gasped as i felt the cool lube against my rim. I gripped Kino’s shoulder tightly as Hui’s fingertip rocked little by little until he pushed through. “Have you been practicing for me, love?” He cooed in between kisses to my shoulder blades.

Kino’s fingers teased at my other entrance. “You know she did, Hyung. I can almost see her on her bed with her legs spread. That cute vibrator you got her stuffed in her ass while she fingers herself.” he slid his fingertips up my folds and rubbed my clit for a second before stroking me again.

“Is that right, Baby? Do you still use the vibe i got you?” His finger was firmly pushed inside me now and my ass struggled to relax around it. I bit my lip and nodded.

“I got bored. No one to play with and I couldn’t travel like 7 thousand miles to fuck.” I grabbed Kino’s wrist and rocked against his fingers faster. “M-more.”

Hui’s second lubed finger pressed against my hole, squeezing in beside the other until he scissored me open. “Fuck…” He breathed. “Relax for me, baby, I want to fuck you good.”

I was panting already, my clit throbbing at both sets of fingers inside me. My body eased into a comforted lull wanting to hold off just a little longer until they were both inside me. Kino kissed at my neck, licking wherever he pleased.

“Your hickies are starting to go away, it’d be a shame if you got some more. You’d look like a cheetah.” Kino moaned against my sweat slicked skin.

“You do that and I’ll make sure I bite you so hard you bleed.”

“Damn, is that a threat or a promise, princess?” He said the pet name mockingly. I leaned back away from him, pressing my back to Hui’s chest and guided his head towards mine. He didn’t even hesitate to slide his tongue into my mouth and moan my name into the kiss. I gripped his dark locks as his third finger threatened to join the others. I winced into the kiss and mewled.

“Hui...ahhh…”

Hui drizzled a little bit more lube between my cheeks and his fingers went in even smoother. He gripped my shoulder with his free hand, pushing me down slightly so his fingers could dig in deeper. In front of me Kino had dropped his shorts, his cock suddenly bobbing free, a bit of precum glistening at the tip. “I’ll punish that mouth of yours, sweetness.” He grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me to his cock, completely bending me over between them.

Kino pressed the tip of his cock against my lips, forcing my mouth open to envelop him. I grabbed his hips, desperately trying to anchor myself as my mouth stretched open mimicking my gape. He was already rocking his hips which made him slide deeper into my mouth. My tongue tried to keep up, swirling around and rubbing against his veins but his grip on the back of my neck kept me in place. Hui’s fingers left me for a moment and i heard the clang of his belt buckle hit the ground. I had a little bit of time to catch my breath, popping off of Kino’s cock and swallowing down his precum. He tilted my head up and looked down at me. “We’re not done yet, princess.”

“Call me that one more time.”I said through grit teeth. “And you wont have a dick for me to suck.”

He gripped his base and traced the outline of my lips with the head of his cock. “Be a good girl and don’t scream, would you?”

I felt Hui spread my cheeks apart, the length of his dick sliding up and down my slick hole. He stopped every once in awhile to pressed against my hole, pushing in until i sucked in his head. As soon as Hui made his way in Kino resumed his invasion of my mouth. My moans remained trapped in my throat as both men rocked their hips into me. My hand made its way between my legs rubbing the wetness that was already building up. I shoved three fingers inside me, wanting to be filled in every whole. I wish Hyojong would suddenly appear and fill my pussy so i could be complete. My fingers would have to make due for now. But even that was taken away from me. Hui pulled my arms behind my back and pinned them in place.

“No, love. None of that.”

“You’re mouth is mine tonight and Hyung said I could have your pussy too.” He yanked my hair back so my mouth was freed of his deep thrusts. Then, in one fell swoop, Kino set my legs on his shoulders and lifted me up completely. Hui braced himself against the building wall, thrusting straight up inside me while my dripping center lay fully open for Kino to see. I was sandwiched between them, panting as my knees were practically against shoved to my ears. Kino quickly rolled on the condom, which i assumed that was what Hui tossed him earlier. He kept me propped up against them both and thrusted deep. I couldn’t help the scream that escaped me. Their thrusts were hard and fast and god did i love getting fucked like this. My head rolled back onto Hui’s shoulder where his labored breath ghosted across my nipples. Every inch of my skin felt so sensitive now, like i could cum at any moment just from one touch. I never wanted their cocks to leave me.

“I want to cum so bad,” I panted. “Please.”

I could hear Hui’s hips slap against my ass as his thrusts got rougher. “I know, love. But we want you to feel so amazing first. We know you love being gaped open like this.”

I nodded quickly as i bit down on my bottom lip, tearing it open. I could feel myself tiptoeing closer to the edge. My slick sounds of Kino fucking my wet heat filled my ears. My thighs quivered and I heard Hui whisper, “Your ass is so fuckin’ tight for me.”

“She gonna cum everywhere, Hyung. Just look at her.” Kino swallowed hard, trying to keep up the facade that he wasn’t going to burst at any minute either. Hui was the opposite. His face was already twisted in pleasure, cock swelling and stretching me further.

“Yes!”I hissed. “Kino, baby, make me cum. I want both of you to make me cum!”

Kino’s thrusts were becoming sporadic and wild and Hui was following suit. My nails dug into my arms Hui was still holding captive, my toes curling in the night hair, and my lungs burning as i moaned loud. My orgasm came gushing out off me seeming to never end. My body seized and thrashed against them as i felt them cum with me. Kino stayed inside me for a moment until his arms couldn’t support me any longer. My lower half fell instantly, with only Hui keeping me from falling completely. Kino rolled onto the building panting heavily.

I shivered and Hui kept me close, petting my sweat drenched hair and whispering that it was ok. He slipped out of me slowly so i could lay flush against his chest. His heart was racing with no sign of slowing down. I kissed him gently and pushed his hair back.

“Get a room,” Kino panted. He made his way over to me and kissed my shoulder. “You ok?”

I parted from Hui momentarily and kissed Kino. He nursed my bleeding lip gently. “Hmm, you bit your lip hard.”

“Yeah well...shit happens. I don’t think I can walk.” I said.

Hui finished buckling his belt and putting on his jacket. “I’ll carry you to your dorm.”

Kino looked down at his drenched shirt. “You’re lucky I have some more clothes in my gym bag. You soaked everything.”

My face turned bright crimson. “I didn’t mean to, ok?”

Hui laughed as he helped me to get dressed. “Don’t listen to him. We love it.” Once i was sensibly dressed for travel back to my room, Hui hiked me onto his back, giving me a piggyback ride while Kino carried our gymbags.

Kino tossed the used condoms in the trash as we headed back to my dorm. “Is your roommate home?”

I could barely keep my eyes open. “I have no idea. But honestly she’s probably at Bible study or something.”

“Where’s your key?” Hui asked me. I barely motioned to Kino who was already digging through my bag.

“Got it.” He swiped into the building and I didn’t even notice the awkward stares we were getting. The elevator ride was short and down the hall was my room and most importantly my bed. Kino swiped the key and flicked on the light and illuminated the empty room. Hui laid me down on my bed and rubbed my legs.

“Do you want us to stay here a little bit?”

I nodded, still not really opening my eyes. Kino lifted my legs up so he could scooch into my bed. He propped himself against the wall and set my legs back down on his lap. Hui occupied the top of my bed, lay my head in his lap. I felt their caresses slowly work across my body easing me into a deep sleep.