#anyways hi fey :] enjoying the '' hellhole '' so far???

[tigersbloom]

tigersbloom > firestarved

[illyriantremors]

Beneath the Stars Chapter 2

Chapter I

AO3 Linkage

Summary: The start of Feyre's senior year brings with it a lot of unexpected stress as she prepares for the reality of college applications and finds out a startling revelation from her dad.

Chapter 2

The last bell of the school day chirped sharply in my ear. It was a little unsettling to have to skip my first session of AP Studio Art for a mandated senior assembly, but I kept reminding myself I’d get it back on Friday and that wasn’t so long to wait.

With a graduating senior class just over a grand, the school administration couldn’t fit us all into one space to discuss our impending college admissions. Hell, I didn’t know how they were even going to fit us all into the football stadium for graduation. Rehearsals alone were a nightmare I wasn’t looking forward to.

Thank goodness June was still several months away.

So to rectify the situation and still bore us to tears with endless chatter and a twenty-five page packet I was not prepared for, our principal assigned each senior a period of class over the first week of school to skip so that smaller groups could convene and go over the college application process.

It was exactly as boring as it sounded.

And also terrifying.

“They really expect us to do all of this?”

I whispered to Tamlin as my fingers flicked through the pages of our University Admittance: A Prythian High School Guide. On the podium, senior class counselors took turns shouting into the mic going over the pages in excruciating detail.

“Aw, come on, Fey - it’s not so bad.”

I glanced over the four pages weighing the pros and cons of the SAT versus the ACT alone and rolled my eyes. Tamlin had already taken both and received the equivalent of an O Level Owl in each.

“I’ll help you study - if you’re nervous about it,” Tamlin said, noting how I hadn’t left the state testing page yet as our counselor moved on to essay writing. Apparently, we’d need to meet with our English teachers for at least two sessions to go over our essays.

“I’m not nervous,” I said. “This just seems like a chore.”

“It’s only a chore because you spend more time fiddling with art brushes than you do actual homework, Feyre.”

I turned to my left and shot Lucien an irritated stare. “I’m not completely daft, I’ll have you know!” Though I was still whispering, my voice definitely carried the undertone of a shout. “I may not have as high a reading level as you do, but I’m in Calculus.”

Lucien snorted.

“Bravo, Feyre. Calc - A true accomplishment.”

“Whatever, Lukey. This just seems like a lot of work, but I’ll be sure to congratulate you when you get accepted into every Ivy League you apply for.”

“You better.”

Lucien and I exchanged angry smirks and Tamlin hissed, “I’m so proud of you two. It only took you a year to still not get along with each other.”

“You can blame Tam, for that,” Lucien said and I was surprised to hear a little genuine fire behind it. “He has a habit of creating dysfunctional relationships wherever he goes.”

On my right, Tamlin finally looked up from his packet and glared at Lucien.

“Am I missing something…?”

“Application fees!”

My head shot up. On the Powerpoint presentation up on the auditorium screen in front of us, the very same two words our counselor had just said loomed large in big, bold red letters - like they knew this was going to be the worst part and had sent a pre-emptive red flag to warn us.

My hands sped through the packet to find the corresponding page. Cringing in on itself, my body sunk lower into my seat.

The average application fee was ballparked at $65-70 per school and that was just to apply! There was no guarantee you’d even get into the school and assuming you did, you couldn’t attend more than one school. No matter how you looked at it, there was a lot of money adding up in this packet preparing to be wasted.

And rates went up for applications to out of state schools. It was like one massive joke: apply elsewhere and go bankrupt, or stay local and rot in the hellhole you’ve always hated.

Not that California was always that bad. I actually quite enjoyed the wicked heat the southern landscape brought in. And nothing could quite beat having Disneyland and the beaches within easy driving distance no matter how far inland or north you might live.

But my parents - dad, I mentally corrected, since mom hadn’t called once since walking out on us three months ago - could hardly afford groceries. Sixty, seventy, eighty bucks a pop suddenly felt like a choice between my future and hamburger helper for a week.

I thought of other states - upstate New York, Pennsylvania, North Carolina - all places with reputable universities, but still far enough away that I could maybe feel more relaxed. My reveries of open skies and fields so far outside the major cities you could actually see the stars was interrupted by Lucien’s quiet notice of my head sinking into my lap as I shrank into the seat.

“You okay, Feyre?”

My eyes flew open. I hadn’t even realized I’d closed them. “Yep, dandy as a lion.”

“That makes no sense.”

“It’s like dandelions, Lukey. Get it? Because they’re dandy.”

“And you two are five-year-olds,” Tamlin said. “Now shut the hell up, I’m trying to concentrate.”

I glanced down at Tamlin’s lap, but instead of our college guide, he was rifling through interview notes. I grimaced.

Newspaper.

Tamlin’s obsession.

“Not this already?” I whined. “It’s barely even the first day of school, Tamlin. You promised not to get so obsessed this year.” The look I gave him when he looked up to argue said enough.

“I’m not obsessing,” and he added air quotes around the word. “Ianthe got senior editor this year, but Mr. Hybern is letting her pick her co-editors. There are only two spots and five of us are fighting for them. If I want to be able to add Senior Co-Editor of the Prythian High Monthly to my college apps, I have to be vigilant.”

I didn’t reply and it forced Tamlin to stop reading his notes. He knew how worked up I got over this. We’d fought about it on and off all summer after his obsessive habits with Newspaper staff all junior year.

“Look,” he said, taking my hand. “This is important to me. Don’t you want me to do well? The better my college applications look, the more places I can get in and the more options we’ll have together to find universities close together.”

“Close together? Why not the same university?”

“The odds we’ll get into the same exact schools are slim. You said it yourself, you’re only really looking at art schools.”

I couldn’t fault him there. I was only really looking at art schools.

“Cheer up, Feyre,” Lucien said, stuffing his packet into his backpack and standing up at the precise moment the bell rang to let us out. “If Tamlin’s busy with Ianthe, that just means you get to spend more time with my lovely self.”

“Oh goody,” I said mustering up as much sarcasm as I could find. “You can take me horseback riding through the Hollywood Hills on the weekend. Or - ooh, I know! We can hunt Dementors in the Forbidden Forest. Won’t that be fun!”

“My ideal Friday night.”

“Let’s go home,” Tamlin concluded, but home was really the last place I wanted to be.

I was more than surprised when I pulled into the driveway and found my sister Elain’s car parked. I spotted a bright yellow sunflower sitting next to the steering wheel of her bright blue VW Bug and shook my head.

Because of course Elain’s car would have flowers.

My driveway was nowhere near as long as Lucien’s, but it was still a good trek from the car to the front door and as I stepped inside the over-large mansion I’d grown up in, I was met with yet another surprise.

“Feyre!” my sister said with her usual pep amid a mountain of boxes. “Thank goodness you’re home. I’m so lost with what to do with all these boxes.”

She stood up and scratched her scalp between the delicate gold bands of the headband she’d wrapped around her blonde locks.

It was odd seeing her home. When mom left, it hadn’t taken long for Nesta and Elain to take off for school. Summer sessions weren’t unusual for them especially now that they TA-ed for their professors to earn extra cash towards their PhDs, but the university they attended in LA was close enough that they generally tried to stay home over summer and put up with the commute.

Just not this summer apparently.

I watched her looking around at all the boxes, huffing a big sigh and couldn’t help but be amused by her cluelessness. For being a scientific smartie, Elain could sure be thick about other things. “Well for starters, you might want to go change into some jeans or something. I’m not sure a maxi dress is optimal for this kind of challenge.”

I set my backpack down on a nearby chair and went over to pick up one of her boxes. “What is all of this anyway? You and Nesta finally get sick of University housing and decide to move in together officially?”

Elain gave me a blank doe-eyed stare.

“You know, I’m sure dad is cool with you two keeping your stuff here even if you don’t technically live here all the time anymore. You could probably move to Tennessee and he’d still keep your rooms exactly as they are.”

A nervous chuckle threatened in my throat and promptly died when Elain said tentatively, “Feyre… didn’t dad talk to you?”

I set the box down. “Talk to me about what?”

“Um, he’s in the study. And on second thought, I think I’ve got this,” and she pointed at all the boxes in a gesture that hinged just a little bit on frenzied, “covered.” Then she bit her lip - the telltale sign of an Elain fib. Classic.

“Elain?”

“Just go talk to dad, alright?” Her chest decompressed. “Don’t make me be the one to tell you.”

Dad was, in fact, in the study and surprise surprise, there were more boxes stacked about. I wondered how long they’d been there and I simply hadn’t noticed from lack of venturing into this part of the house.

Dad was sitting as his desk when I silently breezed up to lean on the door frame. His head was resting in his hand, his arm propped up on the chair.

Gently, I rapped my knuckles along the wall. He blinked up.

“Care to tell me what this is all about?”

“Oh hell,” dad said with a groan, shuffling to get up out of his seat.

“No - sit, sit,” I encouraged, waving him off. “You’ll hurt your knee again if you fuss too much and besides, I get it.”

“You do?”

I moved to sit on the edge of his desk, my legs kicking back and forth until my heels hit the wooden sides. “When were you going to tell me you lost the house?”

“Oh Feyre,” he said and it was as if I could feel all the air rush out of him like it was my body caving in. A part of me had felt not entirely different in that auditorium at school.

“Do Nesta and Elain know?”

“Yes, but only that we’re moving. They think we’re just downsizing.”

“More important question - does mom know?”

His lips tightened into a thin line, my answer. I nodded.

“You’ll have to tell her sometime. She can’t stay away forever whether she wants to or not. You two are still legally married and no one has filed for any kind of divorce or separation - that I’m aware of,” I added when he shot me a look.

“No one’s filed,” he said. “Don’t give me that worry wart look of yours. I’m tired of seeing it.”

“That’s because I’m the only one who ever gives you the worry wart look. Nesta and Elain, on the other hand-”

“Have different ways of coping than you do. Why do you think I told them so far in advance and not you?”

Genuinely curious and not sure of what he would say, I asked, “Why?”

“Because I knew you could take it. Look at you.” He shrugged at me sitting nonchalantly on his desk and I could see his reasoning. We were losing the house and I hadn’t so much as flinched. Meanwhile, Elain sat in the entryway twiddling her thumbs over cardboard boxes and packing peanuts.

I didn’t want to know where Nesta was.

Did that make me a strong person? Or a really callous one?

“So when are we moving? No wait - better question, part two: where are we moving?”

“Not far. It’s only a twenty minute drive, but the neighborhood is decidedly less… affluent than our current community.”

I snorted. As if that mattered. “Big deal. I’ll get a job. We’ll make it work. I’m sure between you, me, and Mary-Kate and Ashley out there, we can come up with enough to get by.”

“Feyre…” Mercifully, he said my name as a chuckle, but I could see the truth lingering in his eyes. Elain and Nesta were dedicated to themselves, which meant their money was too. But who was I to tell my dad who had a tendency to drink when the cards went down in the wrong direction otherwise.

I’d never had a job before - not a real one. Occasionally, I would babysit for neighbors and with the kind of homes I lived next to, those gigs paid big for a teenager looking to see every new movie known to man over summer. Beyond that, however, nothing.

But while Lucien might have been right about my English grades, I was tough and a quick learner. And I would be 18 in December - no longer so fresh to barely be considered for a job. Surely, I could find something.

“Thank you, Feyre,” dad said, taking my hand and giving it a gratifying squeeze. There was just still that tiny lingering sense of something else that made me pause.

“What is it? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong.”

I shook my head. “You have the same look you always get the morning after you and mom have a fight and you drink too much. I know your secrets, old man. Spill.”

“The move is this weekend.”

“WHAT.”

Cue the onslaught of outraged emojis on my phone.

I jumped off the desk and began pacing. College applications? A new job? Moving - this weekend. And there was still the tiny fact that my mother had left us without a word and never looked back to contend with.

Mindlessly, I scratched the skin along the crook of my arm until the itch went away.

“You really kept this from me a lot longer than I thought.”

“But you handled it like a champ.”

“I better get packing,” I said and found myself out the door before dad could really say anything more. Elain was no longer in the entryway when I stepped outside and I managed to avoid her on my way to my room. I noticed a stack of boxes and packing tape had been conveniently left in one corner of my relatively plain living space.

I pulled out my phone and sent a text to Tamlin.

Are you busy right now?

A few minutes went by before the subtle ping! alerted me to his reply.

Sort of, why?

As the fates would have it they’ve chosen this weekend for my family to make an impromptu move.

You’re shitting me, right? You’re actually moving?

Knowing Tamlin’s house was just as large and important as Lucien’s and that he counted appearances as having some kind of value to every Dean of Admissions in America, I sent the next text with a heavy heart.

Yeah dad sort of lost the house

Damn.

Yeah that’s what I thought but we’ll make it work. Could you help us with it though? I know its only a few days away but with Nesta around and this huge house to box up I know dad and I would appresiate the extra help.

Yeah, totally! Anything for you, Fey.

Thanks :)

Love you.

Love you too xx

I let my phone hit the floor as I fell on my bed with a huge sigh.

I could do this.

xx