#doesnt matter if they say the most uncalled for shit

[crying-overit-all]

ok because i really just need to rant 😭😭

i literally cannot with my wench of a math teacher. and she cant with me either so at least thats mutual but she seriously has issues... she has a superiority complex/power complex idk which is the right term to describe it, but she takes advantage of every single aspect of power she has. she has the power to give us detention, so she does so whenever you dont complete homework or get any of the problems wrong. she uses her power over of us students to her advantage to talk to us however she wants. shes condescending and talks to us like we are still five years old. she can be pretty manipulative as well. im not exactly sure if thats the right word to use, but she will be yelling her lungs out one moment, or just give off a bitchy attitude, and the next moment she'll compliment you on something. but no matter what, she is always giving us fake positivity. idk how it came up, but today i heard her say "it doesnt matter where you go to school, you can get a good education from anywhere as long as you pay attention and do what you're told" BYEE WHAT 💀💀 i just dont believe in being obedient so of course i have lots of problems with school already. hearing that "advice" she was giving just made me so angry, and i still am obviously since its been at least five hours and im still thinking about it. but thats exactly what she wants us to do. she wants us to bow down to her and clean her fucking shoes with our tongues without questioning it and teach it as "respect". today in class this guy "talked back" to her and she was like "do you talk to your mommy like that" and the guy responded, "yea". in response, she said "youre so lucky you arent my kid". and that entire conversation was just so uncalled for ??? shes fucking awful to her own elementary school aged children as well. berating your kid for the most stupidest shit like "messy handwriting" has got to be some form of psychological abuse because what the actual fuck. making your kids take math tests every damn day is pretty weird too. like damn. just let them be kids. idk what kids do these days anymore but just let them be. idek why she tells us these stories either. they have absolutely no significance and are just irrelevant. listening to her talk about teaching her kids how to obey to her just reminds me of my piece of shit father. anyways, i think the worse thing ive seen her do was ealier today during the beginning of class when she started touching a girls braids. she was just holding them in her hands and asking odd questions, and my eyes were wide open in shock and under my mask, my jaw was dropped. the girl looked over at me, and clearly looked over uncomfortable. i felt horrible. you just shouldnt be touching anyones hair in general, but i know that many people with afro textured hair feel uncomfortable when others touch their hair. it was just really rude of her to do that. anyways, i want to swtich out of her class so badly but im too scared to talk to my counselor about this. its hilarious how ive only heard bad things about her, but there isnt really anything good to say about her unless your her teachers pet or TA or whatever. one of my friends is a TA for her, and my friend did not have anything good to say about her either 💀 my friend told me that the teacher was trying to gossip about other students with her ??? my friend told me word for word "thats embarrassing". because it is. what fucking grown ass adult goes to gossip about a child with another child PLS...

[ruffiorocks]

Glee season 4 episode 5 Will is an emotional manipulator!

Sooo first off Finn is having a pity party, he thinks working for Burt in the tire shop is somehow degrading? Even though if I remember correctly last season Burt was talking about letting him run the place. Finn also makes a joke about wanting to be crushed by a car in front of ARTIE of all people!

Oh look the graduates are back at the school again, that's not creepy at all. So glad Sue eventually points this out down the line!

Will and Emma are having a counseling session with Coach Beaste of all people? Will opens being the jack ass he is and starts talking about the arts being underfunded, Emma says she isn't disputing that and Will looks pissed off that she's even dared to have a difference of opinion. He doesn't even let her finish talking, before he ends her sentance for her saying their relationship with grow through this experience and it isn't just a oxne in a lifetime opportunity for him but for both of them, and that Emma is dismissing this. Emma says she feels Will assumes she is just going to drop everything and play the part of the dutiful 1950e housewife. While Emma is saying this, the same thing she said last time Will isnt even hiding the fact he is rolling his eyes ans isn't interested in what she had to say. Even though this is quite literally what he expected her to do the last time they discussed this.

Emma talks about how her life, her dreams are somehow secondary to his and he is STILL rolling eyes and scoffing at her every word.

Beaste makes some sport analogy, and compares the relationship to her and her ex, but that was a realationship with physical abuse which isn't the same thing. But she does tell them to take a step back

Emma opens her mouth to talk and Will cuts her off once again, and OH he's admitting he made a mistake when they first talked about it. No he's being the 'nice guy' again and asking her not to look sad and is declaring his love for her, "no matter where we go or what we do I want us to be together, this time its Washington, next time it's anywhere you want to go'. This isn't Will being 'nice' or admitting he was wrong, this is emotional manipulation and him trying to get what he wants because he just can't see past his own desires.

He then says 'im asking my partner ,my equal partner to join me? Will you consider it?" This is just more emotional manipulation and he makes sure there is an audience in Beaste, so it's real hard for Emma to say no, she says yes and you can see she isn't happy about it at all, but Will is to happy he got what he wanted to even notice. Thankfully Beaste HAS noticed! At least someone has!

Other notes:

Marley, sweet angel Marley tells Wade 'Unique' she's in the girls bathroom, but Wade says she sits when she pees and Marley is instantly 💯 % fine with with this. Wade says she ways to play Rizzo, ans drag isn't just an act to her, Marley again is 💯% on board with this. Unfortunately Sue is there 😑.

Hahahaha Sue can't find a bad name for Marley and resorts to 'absolutey stunning, kind, faced blue eyed girl".

Ok, so Sue calls Wade a boy and isn't on board with her playing Rizzo. But wasn't it Sue just last season that wanted Kurt to dress up like a woman for Nationals because Wade has dressing up like a woman? I feel this is a little out of character for Sue, and they just reverted back to her being prejudice so they could someone against Wade. I won't even go into the horrible rant about gender, being trans, being in drag etc that Sue launches into because it's horrible, out of character even for Sue and I'm willing to bet wouldn't be allowed to be said today.

Wade and Marley singing P!nk 😍😍 Marley's 'rock look' is amazing and I wish we had seen more of it.

Naww Ryder is lovely to Marley, who is immediately lovely to him. Ryder is also the second person (aside from Marley) who speaks of her mother with respect. Ryder also immediately doesn't give a crap about Kitty, unlike Jake who dated her regardless of how awful she was to Marley.

Jake only auditions for the musical with the very person who is making Marley's life hell because he can't stand the fact Marley could be into the actual nice guy Ryder. He uses the pretence that it's to stop Kitty killing Marley but he's really just creepy and possessive.

Also...WHY are the known bullies allowed in the musical at all?!! No wonder the Glee kids have issues! Their safe place is never safe for long because no one cares the bullies are there as long as the show is good.

Finn "I don't see what the big deal is, if Unique Identifies as a girl and dresses as a girl she should be allowed to play one on stage' yes Finn! Finally you're out of your pity party and making some sense, NOT Artie who scoffed at Wade playing Rizzo and scoffed at Marley being Sandy because she's brunette?? No Artie would prefer the known school bully to be rewarded with the lead over the lovely angel that is Marley.

Ooh no!!!! Finn used the R word to describe baby Robin!! Two steps forward MILES backwards! Sue maybe being an ass right now about casting Wade, but going after her baby girl was beyond uncalled for. Figgins should have kicked Finn out of the school for that, this is Sue's place of work, Finn just proved he shouldn't be influencing kids and he doesn't even belong there!

Where was Will during all this? Oh yeah just sat there not giving a shit because is to wrapped up in himself to notice whats going on with 'his' kids.

Now back to Emma, who's restored to freaking about germs because Will is stressing her out. Beaste tells her lying is the worst thing (besides violence) someone can do in a relationship and tells her she knows Emma doesn't want to go to Washington. No Coach, do you know what's worse than being forced into agreeing to something that you don't want to do? It's your partner emotionally manipulating you into agreeing and making you think you're in the wrong for ever disagreeing in the first place. But thankfully Beaste does tell her she should tell Will she doesn't want to go. But then takes a step backwards and tells Emma that Will loves her, and that Emma spent so much time trying to be Will's girls she's forgotten why Will fell for her. NO! Emma literally says she can't get in the ways of Will's dreamsmy because that's what Terri did, that's because Will never shuts up about how Terri treated him, which manipulates Emma into trying her hardest not to disagree with him. I'm so sick of people thinking Will is a 'nice guy' who just loves everyone. Poor Emma needed some real support here, not to be guilt tripped by Will and Beaste.

Side note: Tina is right when she said she was fine with Mike and her breaking up, but he could have given her a heads up and let her know he would be invading her space at school and helping with the school musical. No one cares about poor Tina! The most neglected character ever!

Marley and Ryder just want to dance, Jake and Kitty just want to be dickheads. Jake's creepy possession over Marley really gets going here, to the point he's stopping her dancing with Ryder and picking a fight with him. So starts Jake's decline into being an arsehole.

Yay Marley and Ryder got the leads, because they deserve it! They aren't dickheads!

Kitty is fat shaming Marley and her mum. No one! Not one member of the Glee club , Finn or any past students speak up for her at all!! This is the beginning of Marley's body issues!

Emma is freaking out cooking and is having basically a panic attacks, all because of Will!! But she finally says she doesnt want to go to Washington, he is NOT happy, but at least he's listening. Now??? Now he decides to listen to what she has to say? Oh and now he's the 'nice guy' again. Poor Emma, stuck with this arsehole.

Will actually thinks if he doesn't go to Washington the arts will fail in America?? Yeah full of yourself much?? Will also leaves Finn in charge of Glee club, the guy who shot himself with a gun, called Sue's baby the R word and is watching bullying happen before his very eyes and is doing NOTHING about it!!

Conclusions?

The graduates spend too much time at their old highschool!

The bullies are allowed to bully with no consequences, even rewarded. The victims have no safe haven because it's infiltrated by the bullies and as long as they can sing and dance no one care about what the bullying is doing to the good kids like Marley who will eventually become bulimic and no one notices.

Jake is becoming creepy and possessive.

Beaste has fallen for Will's 'nice guy' act.

Finn Hudson should have kicked out of the school the moment the called on of the teachers babies by the R word!

Sue is totally out of character, shes against Wade but late says it's for her protection and states how she had LGBT both boys and girls on the Cheerios.

Figgins is useless.

Tina is neglected!

Will Shuester basically abusive to Emma, it's emotional abuse. He doesn't care about her outside of what she can do for him. He doesn't even let her finish sentance, he tries to make decisions for her and emotional manipulates and guilt trips her into agreeing with him when she is clearly uncomfortable, resulting in an OCD Episode. He then acts like he's OK with not going to Washington, because he didn't winning this one and is being the 'nice guy' again.

Will Shuester is a jackass!!

[imafantasticbaby]

2ne-sone for this Reply

girl you write novels just like me, I respect that. now, I just wanted to say that I do NOT believe he doesn't deserve to be blamed on things that have happened within his company. I will agree he needs to fix things when it comes to better management, better PR and honestly I think he needs to kick his brother out of the CEO chair and take back the title cause his brother is another reason for things being shitty at times. 

i want to address his comments he makes sometimes. The man is brutally honest and I agree he needs GD or CL to take their perfectly manicured and moisturized hands and get a good ole slap. he needs to think before he speaks and I think a major issue for this is that he doesn't go on the media enough to learn how to control his words. Yes he does Kpop Star and survival shows but those are shows where he is use dto saying such bold and harsh criticism. if he actually put himself on other shows like JYP does then maybe he will get the practice. but still he can also learn to fucking choose his words in a way he gets his message across but also doesnt set fire to a wound. hes an idiot for this i agree.

When it comes to Park Bom I am 100% in agreement girl, I am. she deserved better treatment and this long ass “self reflection” needs to stop. It shouldnt have started to begin with and I do hold a lot of blame on YHS for that. He should have made sure things went more smoothly and the recovery was handled better. However, I cant sit here and call him a horrible person because of it because We do not know the full story as too what happened behind YG doors other than what we see in the media speculations-- the media that started the whole damn thing. there could be things we are not aware of so I cant just assume when there are blank spaces. you know? Park Bom has come out herself with a Diray entry and twitter replies saying he is a good guy and takes care of her. So, what else can we do but believe her when she says it? i dont know but I do agree he should have handled it better.

With Minzy I have mixed feelings about her that are my OWN opinions. I respect everyone else opinions too. I just believe that if she stayed then YGE would have been able to continue with a 2NE1 comeback instead of getting discouraged and just giving up on them. They deserved better then that. 

When I mean individual dreams I mean, that Minzy wanted a solo debut, YG wasnt focused on that request at the time so she left. Her Dream for a solo to happen ASAP was not in sight for her at YGE at the moment. I do agree that this should have been delt with better and management should have planned better and worked things out to fulfill this dream because she deserved it. However, It was her choice to go and thats something we have to respect and YG did so by letting her make that choice. I do think they should have rearranged priorities better and started working on giving her the solo she clearly deserved but it didnt happen. and thats a all in all Company’s  fault not one man’s.

Now when it comes to CL and her American Solo activities-- you need to separate YG from it a bit because its not YGE that is handling it on the majority. CL has signed with School Boy Records which is an American record label established in 2007 by Scooter Braun through his School Boy Entertainment company that is also in parent with Universal Music Group. They have signed artists such as PSY, for his american promotions, Justin Beiber, the black eyed peas, and more. They are handling her American promotions and her Solo career there. YG is just getting benefits and also paying them to do so. So because of that, you cant just blame YG for her solo delay. You just cant. if there was anything you could blame YGE for in regardless to this is maybe they need to kick Scooter’s  ass and tell him to hurry up.

Also, yes I am aware that Yang Hyun Suk is the biggest share holder of YG, i mean he is the creator and owner after all. but besides him Naver has majority as well. and has a lot of power and influence in the company. You gotta make your investors happy you know? or they can pull their findings. YHS does have power, I agree, he does have  influence, but he still has to take ideas and orders from his investors and all. and if it comes down to it that they want this thing or they walk then YG has to fold unless he wants to lose billions of dollars in funds.

Yes he is a higher up as well, but hes ONE person and just because hes the founder and owner doesn't mean hes the controller on every detail. there is a Board of directors whether people want to believe it or not and there are votes being held. its how a company runs.

Now I am not appreciating how you think im supporting hate on Park Bom and that I would just go to her and say  “Shit happened, its life.” you take a phrase I used in my post and just create a while thing around it because you are upset with my feelings on the matter. I wouldn’t NEVER do such a thing to her when I agree she CLEARLY deserved better treatment.

Also, im just gonna add that most statement links that get thrown at me are a PR team responding on queue. and then you have the link where YG gives his own thoughts. did you even READ the words? you completely missed his meaning. just like you are completely missing mine because you are a dedicated blackjack ( just like I am. I mean I worship them and support them like crazy and cried for weeks after they disbanded-- but anyway-- ) who is quickly upset when you see a sentence or phrase that sounds horrible against them.

Yes he said  “ What led to the decision to disband the group was the state of Park Bom’s mental health, After ‘the incident the criticisms we received were endless. But in addition to the stress and guilt from that, I’m sure Park Bom would have felt a strong determination to continue 2NE1. I told her, ‘2NE1 is important, but I wish for you to be healthy, both mentally and physically.” 

Now if you actually READ that and understand that he is saying that after the scandal broke out they were SWARMED with ENDLESS hate and most of it was Thrown at Bom. Depression hit for her and she needed a break-- a break that is going too long I agree-- and he reassured her that 2NE1 is important but he wants her to not push herself and do some self care. She was probably constantly crying because of all the hate she was getting and wasnt stable enough to work in the studio. I mean dont you feel like its impossible to do anything after an anxiety attack or something? He was concerned for her and im glad he gave her rest. BUT NOW ITS TIME FOR HER NOT TO HAVE IT. ant to be honest. I believe he had started to end her break. MAMA 2016 happened, the return of Park Bom for a short while. I believe that Performance was a statement to show that she is here and she is ready to PLAY......but then shit hit the fan with Minzy leaving, CL’s american promotions, BP;s Debut and other things and in the end a unanimous decision was made.

But it's not necessarily completely over: “You never know what can happen," he added. "It’s possible they’ll get back together like S.E.S. It may not be as long of a break [as S.E.S], but I’m thinking there’ll be a day when the reunion happens.”

This quote gives me hope that YGE will look to them once again once the time is right and if you cant believe that then thats fine. its your choice, but I will continue to have hope.  

Most of your points where not even ANYTHING I was talking about in my post and you assumed things that you thought I was meaning when I was NOT. 

“You’re assuming that the issues within the company and regarding it’s artists are not all YHS’s fault. In contrast, I’m assuming that a large percentage of the issues are his fault, considering the amount of clout he has within his own company. But here’s the kicker: we will never know if either of us are right because YHS can never give a straight answer.”

One, I agree that YG holds blame on things. I NEVER said he things are not all his fault. I was just expressing that a LOT of hate he gets on the majority is uncalled for. but YES there are a lot he is called for. 

YES I agree. we will never know  the full truth because YGE does not give detailed straight answers, and that might be a reason for it that could be completely understanding, whether its that they just dont want to let the issues carry on or that they are trying to deal with it peacefully without the media knetz gluing themselves to the front door..

but because of this fact we shouldn't be QUICK TO JUDGE and get upset. we are only seeing glimpse of things and we are getting frustrated. we need to breathe, step back and try to understand instead of immediately attacking cause we assume or feel some type of way. 

I was angry when I heard the news of 2ne1, but I didnt start attacking. I did research and I listened to all opinions and monitored Bom and Dara and CL just like all other Black Jacks did. and this is how I got to my conclusion.

whether you agree with me or not, thats okay. you have your feelings, I have mine.

[the-little-red-noodle]

7/24/19 12:09am

“Wish i could get a little undrunk so i could uncall you at 5 in the morning, i would unfuck you..”

i guess its that time of the night where we process some shit before my sleeping pill makes me too high to type. 

mark and i hooked up. it actually happened?.. i’m feeling a lot of things but also pretty reserved, as far as things go with me. i’m not leaping into the romancey shit like I usually do. i’m actually pretty unhappy about it, actually.

i’ve been thinking about this moment for so long.. how it would feel to finally be with him and kiss him and say the things i’ve been feeling, and oh god, to hear it back? i should be happy.. im not happy.

there’s so much on the line here.. it’s not just some friend either.. our friendship was, and is, really important to me. i weighted it above other things, and now i feel like i just threw it all away for selfish reasons. i wanted to feel loved and i wanted to be touched and i wanted to touch him and i wanted to have the satisfaction of knowing he felt the same.. i wanted the euphoria of the calm before the sex where everything’s out on the table and we feel the same way and we’re holding our breath seeing who will make the first move and i just.. 

i think i regret it a little bit..

i think i’ve been selfish about it, cuz its what i wanted and what i have wanted for honestly a really long time but kept to myself cuz there was no way in the world that he would go for someone like me and there’s no way that someone as plain as me could captivate someone like him beyond just sex.. but we didn’t even have sex?.. 

lemme explain.

last night i went out to a drag show with friends, and it was so wonderful and fun and raunchy and just what i needed. it was a confidence boost (even if i struck out with a girl at the bar, i still tried!) and i got back to the frat house at 1am, drunk and confident and ready to push my limits with him.

we hung out for hours in the spare room, me being way too flirty and touchy with him and him being respectful but present.. we talked until i sobered up and we were laying in bed and the lights are off and he names the people he would have sex with in the frat and im not on the list and i feel uneasy and he talks about having a thing for people in the frat and i ask if he ever had a thing for me and he says yes, a while ago. the beginning of rush, over a year and a half ago. and he asks me if i ever had a thing for him and my face feels so hot and i shut my eyes

“you want my honest answer?”

“..yeah”

“.. i kinda still do.”

and he was quiet for so long and i felt so shitty about it and felt like i made things super weird and i said sorry and he was like no yer fine, which made me feel kinda worse.. i changed the subject and we talked about something else for a bit and then he got quiet again so i asked what was on his mind

“just what you said”

“i’m sorry..”

“don’t be. i’m glad you said something. I’ve been kinda feeling the same way for a while and didn’t know what to do about it.” 

i say something to the effect of i was trying to bury it because i didn’t want to fuck up the friendship, and he says he felt the same. and we lay there motionless for a while, staring at the ceiling. everything’s out in the open. cards on the table. breathing.

i move my head to his shoulder, and he wraps an arm around me and my hands are on his chest and our legs are tied up and we just hold each other. silence. breathing. squeezing.

i say “is this stupid? is this dangerous territory?” he says he doesn’t know. 

he asks how long I’ve felt this way, and i say for months probably. it was part of the reason i wanted to end my relationship with spencer, because i was having feelings for someone else.. we lay there. silence. breathing.

he pulls me in closer and holds me so tightly. he says he feels really happy. 

we stay there until he falls asleep and i slip out of his arms cuz i cant sleep tangled up. it takes me a while but i eventually fall asleep. we wake up around 7:30. i go to the bathroom and wash last nights makeup off my face. i come back and we hang out. we talk, we laugh, we cuddle.. 

at some point i was getting frustrated that he wouldn’t just bite the bullet and kiss me. i dont have much balls, but i can communicate enough. and i start getting punchy and he’s laughing at me like what do you want? and im pouting and not saying anything and then eventually he tells me to roll on my side to face him and he looks at me and he moves my hair like in the movies and he moves in and half grazes my lips with his and moves back quickly and says is that what you meant? and i laugh and exclaim yes! finally! 

(and now the good part) 

i pull him back and then it just happens. all that i had envisioned that the moment would be like doesnt matter anymore because its just me and him and we’re kissing and he’s moving almost on top of me and after a bit he pulls off me and lays down and says how was that? and i dont even answer as i start kissing him again and get on top of him and we’re moving and he’s grabbing my ass (mark grabbed my ass?? who are we??) and he’s moaning like i’ve never experienced a guy doing and at some point i say that ya know.. we could like.. actually do it?.. and he says “im not sure” and that he’s a little overwhelmed and hasn’t wrapped his head around the fact that any of this is even happening. and i feel kinda rejected and i get off him, not in a make a scene way, but in a like we should take a breather way. and we lay there and i’m so hot and bothered and he starts apologizing being like 

“was that too much? did i embarrass myself?”

 "no no you’re fine, im just a little frustrated”

“did i do something wrong? I’m sorry”

“no.. i just.. want.. you..”

and then he’s on top of me and he’s kissing me and kissing my neck and he kisses down.. then kinda rests his head on my thigh? and then we just had a totally normal unrelated conversation while he was resting between my legs? in the most nonchalant way and it was wholesome and funny and fuck man..

we moved into his room, cuz ac, and we were laying in his bed talking and sharing memes and i ask what he’s thinking about 

“sex. you?”

“sex.” 

and i look him in the eye and kind of smile, and i think he avoids it and says he’s going to the bathroom, and i’m thinking when he gets back, that’s when it can happen.

it felt kinda perfect in a way. like yeah, i wanted to sleep with him, like badly, but i think it’s better to ease in and not go too fast that we can’t backtrack if necessary.. but i didn’t want to backtrack.. 

in the moment, when its just me and him, i have all the confidence and sensibility to make decisions and do things i’m comfortable with, but then other people talk to me in the house and pull me out of his room and then it becomes a group hangout instead of just us 2. and its fine, cuz we are great friends and we just joined conversation and it peters out.. and then im packing to leave and he gets in the shower and i text him that ill probably head out and he texts me drive safe love ya bud!! and i kinda felt horrible?.. i feel like i’m panicking and hurting.. and i wait for him and he gets out of the shower and we sit together and i just wanted one more slight cuddle before heading out cuz reassurance i guess.. so fucking stupid..

he just goes right back to our usual cadence of banter and memes and physical distance and i’m in a weird fragile place feeling like i need him

i do not need him

and i get enough physical reassurance to put on my big girl face to drive home and go about my day pretending that i’m not deeply upset at the thought that i just lost my best friend cuz i caught feelings..

i know i’m a pretty dramatic person, i did do theatre for years for a reason. homegirl likes attention. and i dont take rejection super well (hence no longer doing theatre lol). and it felt.. weird. 99% of the weird was definitely coming from me. cuz he just started acting like my friend again, and thats fine, but now i want him even more..

had we just fucked and gotten it over with, i could settle down. but we just dry humped and he kissed me over my clothes.. which was lovely, but i’m also a big girl and i want to have sex.. and now i feel like im gunna fixate on it until it can happen..

i think i was underselling him, sexually, to myself cuz i didn’t want to get my hopes up.. he’s not my physical type at all, and he’s like a weird guy and like my best friend, but it ended up being pretty good.. we could find our groove probably, if he wanted to..

i don’t even know where we stand now. i don’t know what he wants, really. he says he’s cool with whatever as long as we stay friends, and i agree. the friendship is the most important thing here. and i don’t want things to be weird, but i cant back out now just for preservation cuz i want to be with him and i love him.. a lot

still processing. glad i got it all on paper, but now its 1am and i gotta cool off cuz im hot n bothered and ugh.. i just wish we could really talk about it..

i texted him that i missed him at like 11:20. he hasn’t responded.

update at 1pm the next day he said “miss you too friend”

dude.. fuck this.

“on some nights like this I cant help but think of us.. i’ve been reminiscing, sipping, missing you. can you tell me whats with all this distant love? on some nights like this I just wanna text you, but for what? you’ll say you want me then go switch it up.. just gonna play with my emotions just because...”

[handslows]

Pretty sure no one should be tolerating the beards when we know how nasty Eleanor was especially towards Harry and then the story of how Danielle basically forced herself on Louis in public came out (plus, if you stick to the narrative, she did cheat on him), and to me both those girls are ugly since they chose to help closet a person. So yeah there's really no reason to be tolerating either of them

ok but like. listen.

this is gonna be long because yall are exhausting me and miss the point every fucking time

i never liked eleanor bc she was annoying and said nasty things about fans and larries and her friends were terrible esp. max. we only heard these bad stories about what she allegedly said about harry AFTER they broke up too. so i didnt particularly like her and she had done her fair share of bad shit across the years but that doesnt mean ppl can say shit about her looks?? which no one did btw. people were far kinder to eleanor than they ever been to danielle.

the thing with danielle is for months and months and months she NEVER said a single word about louis and never posted about him on social media and NEVER interacted with fans (still hasnt). she was just there. but people still spent HOURS talking shit about how bad her shoes and clothes and facial expression were. which was just super unnecessary and nasty. you can not like someone for the job they are doing but attacking a young woman for how she looks is just really fucking low. so i always stood out against that, against the completely unnecessary criticisms. because you know these were not personal criticisms against her, these people wouldve said more or less the same shit about any woman because they dont like what she represents. so yeah, it really fucking annoyed me.

i also lost followers and mutuals for being done with people’s bullshit. people kept projecting so many intentions on her like, people were legit talking like she was forcing herself into louis’ family house bc she was so ‘desperate’. some posts even sounded as if she tricked louis into taking a pic so she could post it on her insta like??? calling her non-expressive resting face ‘smug’ on every pap pics??? like JFC shes not smug shes just!! existing!!! if everyone saw my resting face theyd all call me a bitch. and if she was smiling then she was desperate. so smug or desperate, what a luck. people were losing their fucking minds. i never gave a shit about her, i thought she was a pretty girl doing an annoying job and i wanted her gone as much as everyone else but thats it. except for being a beard (which btw we dont know the details of the contract between the two no matter how much ppl tried to blame her for everything thats bad in the world) she didnt do ANYTHING publicly that was annoying enough or on par with eleanor except existing. people mocked her over how she swung her bag for like, 2 weeks. 

the story of danielle allegedly forcing herself on louis happened LATE 2016, like november?? and only got discussed on tumblr like, a month ago, so you using this as an argument is weak. There was no reason to preemptively hate danielle because of this story back in january 2016 no matter how hard you try to convince yourself that your hate was justified. everyone was just being nasty and bitter and going crazy over babygate and losing sight of what their priorities are. that’s it.

even if people had “receipts” on her prior to that that would justify why they hate an unknown nonfamous 21 years girl so much, they never shared it with the fandom as a whole and therefore, the fandom as a whole did not have any reason to hate her this much. literally the only story i heard is that apparently she was rude to a waiter in a restaurant. omg!!! bring out the torches!! this totally justify you spending hours mocking her face!!!! unless youre telling me that “big larries hated her therefore we all hated her too” because thats just sad and another problem altogether. so yeah dont try to use that as a reason of why you said nasty shit about her appearance back in february 2016.

i dont even know why im saying this because…having reasons to hate her will never justify the amount of absolutely deranged comments ive read about the way she looks. it was and will always be totally uncalled for and i cant believe how far this fandom went, i cant believe the stuff adults have written about this thinking it was ok. if she is that much of a terrible person there has to be more shit you can say about her than your subjective opinion that her resting face looks “smug” and that shes desperate for being in the presence of louis. i also cant believe how much people mocked her for not being famous enough even though a recurrent role in tv show is more than most people can achieve and when yall know you wouldve hated her for being famous if she was. so, eleanor was bad because she was non-famous using louis’ money and not going to school, taylor is bad because shes too famous and using 1d and harry’s name for her own career and danielle had a recurrent role in a popular franchise and that still was not ok for yall. i get the point is that youre never gonna “like” any beard no matter what her job is because you hate beards but just ADMIT IT and find other things to talk about instead of making up reasons why shes a bad person.

so, honestly, this isn’t about danielle at all. i dont care about her feelings or whatever. my problems is that for months ive read thousands of comments criticizing this girl for doing ANYTHING. and the worst is that when i was telling people they should probably calm down and that attacking a girl for how she looks is not cool at all, i got hate and lost followers and had mutuals indirecting me. because apparently having human decency was too much for people to handle. because apparently people still dont get that criticizing a girl for how she looks and dress as bigger far-reaching consequences in the long run. for months ive had to see people spreading bullshit and lies about her just because of their assumptions. 

and this goes for briana too. that girl is awful and did a lot of fucked up shit and i totally support talking shit about her AS LONG AS ITS FOCUS ON THE BAD THINGS SHES DOING. ive also been disgusted at comments towards briana or ashley shaming her for how they look and i dont find it more acceptable just because i hate them too. theres a line and yall crossed it, like, 12 months ago.

im not saying you have to tolerating neither of them now because of you what found out, im just saying that what you DIDNT KNOW a year ago cannot be used to justify what you did back then. 

anyway this isnt about danielle this is about how i still can’t believe i lost hundreds of followers and dozens of mutuals because i argued that talking shit about how she looks was not valid criticism and was a harmful behaviour. 

and if you still don’t think that’s fucked up and still wanna defend that nasty behaviour from last year i can’t help you.

[pearlrebs]

I guess i wasnt very clear. Easy to seem angry over the internet unintentionally. I mean to say; rebs url (a small thing) represented something to us. Xe left and we all really miss xer. Xe mattered to us and was a special part of tjlc. 1/8

In many peoples eyes this is an aggressive act. Im sure that you can see at least a little how we would see it that way. 2/8

I wasnt implying that you are not queer or that i hate queers. i was saying that, this is the internet, im not going to always believe everything everyone tells me. 3/8

Most queers i know, try and stick together despite our differences. And the fact that you seem very angry (could be reading into it) at a group of people who are predominately queer tells me that you COULD be something other than queer. 4/8

As you yourself said this is just a tv show...but its more than that isnt it? Why you spend so much thought throwing shade at rebs or the tjlcers or whoever, tells me that theres something else going on and that it is important. 5/8

banding together with like-minded people is the solution to the political shitfest we are in. I'd like to think that we could work thru our differences to reach our common goals assuming, we have common goals. (if im wrong, please let me know) 6/8

I dont see myself as a victim, im only sad. not in a pitying way. Its hard to describe. You were probably the victim of an angry tjlcer on here or witnessed the chaos and theres really no excuse for hatefullness (im admonishing my own camp here). 7/8

debate, yes, but never being mean just to be mean. That doesnt get anyone anywhere. I hope this makes sense and im not trying to offend you. I just think life is too short to hate. And its sad that there has been much on here. 8/8

I’m actually not angry, I think it’s all kinda funny. Though I do try my best to respond seriously to serious messages. The “go fuck yourself”s will always be met with a “sounds good,” but when someone takes the time to send a message like this, I tend to pay attention. Anyways...

First you say you’re not going to always believe everything everyone tells you, then you turn around and say that the tj//lc group is predominantly queer. Who’s telling you that? Hard evidence? Demographics data? A census taken by a neutral third party to determine age range and sexuality, and what direction they believe the show should go? As I answered someone before: anecdotal evidence is inadmissible in science and court for a reason. Of course since you’re a lesbian (a factoid gleaned from your profile, but if this is inaccurate, please inform me. But I could easily say you’re not, but I don’t, because when someone tells me they’re queer, I believe them, who the hell wants to be in a [most places on the globe] hated minority? [by “hated,” I mean high risk of murder, bullying, and homelessness, and possibly being a criminal act depending on where you live]), your experience is going to be skewed towards finding other queer people. You think the group is predominantly queer people, but from the outside looking in, even as a queer person, I’ve mostly seen a bunch of straight women geeking over two middle aged white dudes possibly touching dicks, and using “representation” as a mask. I haven’t mingled with your community — I’ve got my own, who are and aren’t queer all the same.

And again, I say that with full knowledge that it is anecdotal evidence from my viewpoint and experience. I could be wrong. But that doesn’t mean you’re right either. 

Moving on. Most queer people (I don’t like the term “queers” personally, but as a queer person, you can reclaim that word however you want) you know stick together despite the differences. Okay. But if our difference is that you don’t think I deserve rights, or that my life is somehow worth less than a straight person’s (voting Dump/Pence, specifically Mike Pence, who would rather a gay person go to a conversion camp — where the risk of suicide is nearly 70% — than be gay), then that’s not a “difference.” That’s almost a hate crime (and it actually is in some countries). 

I assume you and I have similar goals — stop the carney-handed mango. I assume all but the 14% of LGBT people who did vote for that cheeto in a wig, do. Hence why I make a point of saying I don’t hate Rebs as a person (although the fact that xer Patreon is still up, and xe’s still collecting money, despite the fact xe’s publicly declared xe has no intention on ever making videos again, and even taking the existing ones down, is a little less than the perfect angel everyone is insisting that xe is). 

Tbh, maybe I tend to befriend more queer people irl, but you know what else is important? Straight allies. To me, being LGBT+ is a description of where I put my genitals/my gender identity, and I don’t exactly bond with people over that. A shared struggle, yes, and if I see a queer person being bullied, I will step in. I can support a gay man’s rights, even if that gay man is going out there campaigning for the orangutan in a suit (and some did). I’ll say he should be allowed to get married to whoever he wants, and when his Nazi buddies turn on his ass, I’ll be helping him find a visa out of here, but dear Ahura Mazda, I wouldn’t be caught dead having a beer with him. In fact, they most criticism I’ve ever gotten for being trans, is from other trans people. Yes, they should have rights, but fuck them as individuals, holy shit, don’t tell me how to transition. You can be trans (or any LGBT+) and still be a shitty person. 

But like... about 10%-15% of people are queer. 10%-15% of people couldn’t have voted for our rights and won. Meaning we have a ton of straight people on our side. And that’s what we are: we’re people. I love Steven Universe and pizza. I’ll find people that love Steven Universe and pizza that didn’t vote for literally satan. 

I’ve personally never been wronged by a hateful tj//lcer. But as you pointed out, there was a lot of hatefulness that was slung around. I watched as people attacked Mark Gatiss for not making their ship canon, or call him straight (they really care about representation, don’t they? /s), attacked other queer ships, tags, bullied some other queer shippers into self-harm, etc. 

No, that wasn’t you doing any of that, and that wasn’t anything you participated in... This blog really isn’t about you, I don’t know why you’re so sad about it. This is about everyone’s actions that I’m starting to suspect we both found deplorable. Though I guess if you were a close follower of Rebs, you hated Mary from second one, which was really uncalled for (hate her for shooting Sherlock — I don’t, but it’s a reason — but that didn’t happen until we knew her for two whole episodes, half of a third, and she was just a lovely person until that exact moment). 

The thing is, it IS just a show to me. I’m just responding to hate until I get bored with it. But tj//lc it became so much more to a bunch of people, and that’s why it got so toxic. 

Again, THE PROBLEM is tj//lcers were demanding representation from a show, and writers, who were always honest that they weren’t going to give it. At least not in the way they wanted (and when it wasn’t in the way they wanted, they had tantrums, which is why I say: it was never about “representation” for some of them.). Rebs, even if it started as just a hobby, quickly became, and fed into this mass conspiracy that ultimately did end up hurting a lot of people. Possibly including xerself. That’s why I don’t feel bad taking your symbol: it is just a show, everyone had prior warning that jxhnlock wouldn’t happen, so the conspiracy was always just going to be fanfiction, and Rebs did some shitty things. 

The way people are freaking out... they need to get over it. Or if not, okay, soak in grief forever over a fictional ship, but there’s probably better ways of dealing with all this besides sending me hate. Because honestly, what does anyone hope to accomplish by sending me hate? Me to delete? Sure, let’s say I did that. Jxhnlock isn’t going to be any more canon, and Rebs isn’t going to be any less wrong, and all of the hate xe encouraged is still going to be out there. Oh, and I’ll keep responding, which really just makes it worse. 

Had people just ignored me — never sent any messages — there would be precisely one post on this blog, which was my original announcement that I had it.

Also — what have I said that’s “hateful?” Yeah, okay, I called rebs a “twat” for being a misogynist, I thought it was delightfully ironic, having a misogynistic slur juxtaposed next to that observation (like saying, “don’t fucking swear”), but no one got the joke, so I took it down. But otherwise? Saying John Watson is Straight is just a fact. Jxhnlock never happened, and since it didn’t, the insistence that he’s bisexual has no standing. He’s always said, “I’m not gay.” I never took that to mean he was saying, “I’m not gay, but I like men, I’m bisexual/pansexual.” Jeez, no, if he was part of the community at all, I imagine he’d let it pass, rather than get angry about the assumption (like Sherlock does, who is, said by the writers, to be neither gay nor straight. In fact, I’ve often heard that if you’re a good straight ally, it means not being upset if people assume you’re gay for standing up with them — so in some interpretation, he’s actually a bit homophobic). I’ve also pointed out that xe was wrong, which xe is. My banner is of Gatiss confirm jxhnlock wasn’t happening again — this is a thing that happened. Are facts “hateful” now? 

Also... “life is too short to hate.” I mean... I think I’ve got enough life left in me to hate the sentient tire fire that uses too much fake tan cream, and the apparent resurgence of Nazis in America. Don’t you? Shouldn’t you? 

tj//cers are definitely not on that level, but I don’t hate them, is the thing. I said this before: I hate no one in particular, just what the legacy produced. 

[obsessedbybucky]

do all the questions :x (now i'm the small dick with a lot of balls)

Here I did them all bb

1: Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reason you are confused right now?There's this guy I've been talking to for more or less three weeks and I've gone to see him at his job and chill with him and all and he looked interested. He even asked me to come hang out by his place this morning. It was the single most boring morning I've ever had. We didn't do anyhing, kiss/sex/etc, and all he did was talk and drink and smoke and play with his tattoo things, idk man. Then he tells me he's going to sleep and I'm ???? Ok??? So I left, and before I left he told me he would text me when he woke up. He didnt. Idk man.

2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone?The only person that's ever done that to me was one of my best friend's ex I fucked on his birthday. He was sweet. My best friend was happy for us but it didn't work so

3: If your significant other smoked pot, would you care?Nah fam

4: Do you find it easy to trust others?Very

5: What were you doing at 11PM last night?Sleeping and I received a text from my friend saying her significant other was just being diagnosed with cancer.

6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?Me, myself and I probably

7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?Probably nothing lmao

8: Are you close with your dad?Haven't seen him in a decade

9: I bet you kissed someone last night, right?Damn I wish

10: What are you listening to?Some NSYNC

11: You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life - what is it?Mcdonald's Caramel Iced Coffee

12: Do you like hickeys?Never had one

13: What time do you go to bed?Around 9 am

14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down?544444444444444rThis is kinda sad but my best friend. Also Lucas but fuck Lucas.

15: Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both?Not really lmao

16: Do you always answer your texts?Depends on who's texting

17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?Yeah man. What he did what unnecessary and uncalled for.

18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?Some hours ago

19: Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them?Probably my best friend. And up until yesterday morning, it was the guy from question 1

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?"I hope he really will text me later"

21: Is anyone else in the room with you?Nope

22: Do you believe what goes around comes around?Yeah man

23: Were you happier four months ago than you are now?Yeah, I was at the peak of my happiness

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?So many people man

25: In the past week, have you cried?I don't remember tbh

26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing?Grey, black and blue

27: Do people ever call you by your last name?When I was younger

28: Is anyone ignoring you right now?The guy from question 1

29: Do you have a best friend?I have two

30: Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?Yeah, even though it was a whole month ago and I know he wants nothing to do with me

31: Who was your last call/text message from?One of my two best friend

32: Are you mad at anyone?So many people tbh

33: Have you ever kissed someone older than you?I only ever kissed one person that was younger than me

34: How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?23 or 24, I'm not sure

35: How many more days until your birthday?92 days

36: Do you have any summer plans yet?Not really

37: Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex?Not really

38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?Yep

39: Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone?Yep

40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?Ah man, so many times

41: Do you think age matters in relationships?Depends, really

42: Are you available?As fuck

43: How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended?at least 5, not sure if there's more though

44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?I want my lip piercing back

45: Do you believe exes can be friends?Hell to the nope

46: Do you regret anything?So many things man

47: Honestly, what’s on your mind right now?The fact that my best friend's significant other's got cancer and the dude from question 1. In between these questions I went to a McDonald's to get some iced coffee and I wanted to get some cigarettes and he works at the gas station next to it and I knew he finished at 7 and it was past 7 so I went to go there but I saw him so I noped the fuck out and I told my sister to get my cigs for me and he told her he saw me nope the f out on my way there. it's been 45 minutes, I thought he would text me to ask me why but nah. He just doesnt give a fuck man, depresses me.

48: Did you ever lose a best friend?Yeah

49: Was your last kiss a mistake?Not really, he was the most gorgeous person I've ever kissed. Even though he was a real asshole afterwards, 18/10 would do it again

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?I don't think he likes me, he actually made it pretty clear.

51: Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry?Yep. Some awkward story, let me tell you

52: Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?He works at my job so if we work together he talks to me, idk

53: What was the last thing you ate?Cookies

54: Did you get any compliments today?No, which is a shame bc look at me, i'm gorgeous

55: Where are you going on your next vacation?Back to Montreal bitchessssss

56: Do you own anything from other countries?Yeah, some things I bought when I was in New York. The other things are from ebay and shit.

57: Are most of your friend guys or girls?Girls

58: Where have you lived most of your life?Charlevoix, Quebec, Canada, which is disgusting

59: When was the last time you took a long drive?Last weekend

60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?No???? And I dont know why???

61: Have you ever TPd someone’s house?Nope

62: Who do you text the most?My best friend

63: What was the last movie you saw?Begin Again I think, of Me Before You

64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?Have no bf/gf

65: How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2011?Lmao under 0

66: Is the last person you kissed younger than you?Nope

67: Do you curse around your parents?I do

68: Are you happy with where you live?Kinda

69: Picture of yourself?Nah

70: Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships?I don't even really believe in relationships tbh. I'm 18 and never had any

71: Have you ever been dumped?We weren't in a relationship but it did felt like I was dumped real hard

72: What do you most like about making out?The touching and the kissing, idk, I just love everything about it.

73: Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with?Lmao always

74: When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other?Them

75: What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive?The stomach. If they have abs, there's 96% chance I'd bang them

76: Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?My best friend

77: Had sex with someone you knew less than an hour?Lmao yeah

78: Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?Happened once

79: What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face?When someone kisses me

80: Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?Yeah why not

81: Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you?Yeah, awkward

82: Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush?YEAH LMAO

83: Do you miss your last sweetie?No, fuck that fucktard

84: Last time you slow danced with someone?Never

85: Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met?Nope, except when I was like 11

86: How can I win your heart?Be attractive and give me compliments.

87: What is your astrological sign?Taurus

88: What were you doing last night at 12 AM?Sleeping man

89: Do you cook?Does mac and cheese count?

90: Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication?Yeah omg weirdly

91: If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship?Sometimes yes, but then I remember I'm a hoe that wants to fuck a lot of people so

92: Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly?Let's put it like that, I've only ever had sex with the same person more than once once, and I did him twice.

93: What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest?I'm very superficial tbh, I like twinks. I love it when they're small.

94: Name four things that you wish you had!A beautiful person to fuck withAt least 2k$A penis and no boobs sometimesFriends tbh

95: Are you a player?I am

96: Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day?I think the most I did was like 4 different people in one evening. Wasn't even playing spin the bottle or anything

97: Are you a tease?yeah

98: Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr?No :(

99: Have you ever been deeply in love with someone?Nope

100: Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?Yeah

101: Hugs or Kisses?Kisses

102: Are you too shy to ask someone out?yeah

103: The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?The ass or the stomach

104: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?yep

105: If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was in relationship, would you go for it?Yeah I'm a hoe

106: Do you flirt a lot?yep

107: Your last kiss?Okay so I was out at a bar with some friends and when the bar closed, I got my cellphone and I saw this dude from work texted me and I answered and he replied instantly back. Some friends wanted to go up to this dude's hotel room and I didn't wanna and I couldn't find a taxi. So I drunk called the dude and asked him to come and get me. Which he did. Lots of shit were said during the hella long car drive and once we were at my place, I don't really remember if I kissed him before the bj happened but I definitely kissed him before he got out of my apartment. So yeah.

108: Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2012?lmao way more

109: Have you kissed anyone in the past month?The dude from 107

110: If you could kiss anyone who would it be?Justin Timberlake or Dylan O'brien tbh

111: Do you know who you’ll kiss next?I thought it was the guy I saw yesterday morning but now idk

112: Does someone like you currently?I don't think so

113: Do you currently have feelings for anyone?Nah

114: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?Flings bc hoe

115: Ever made out with just a friend?Yep

116: Are you happier single or in a relationship?Single I guess, never had any relationships.

[marinasorter]

ok you know what? that whole spiel was honestly SO disrespectful i dont even know where to start.

well first off, you need to realize that racism is NOT about intent, its about the effect. imagine if i punched you, by accident, just because it was an accident does matter because now you have a bruise. the bruise was the effect of physical harm. the bruise doesnt disappear because it realizes that the offense was an accident and that the offender didn’t actually intend to leave a bruise on you. you got hurt, and because of a punch, and that’s that.

the same thing can be applied to racism, and any other kind of -isms out there, and any form of abuse (especially emotional/mental). katie called me a roach, and it doesn’t matter if she meant it in a harmful way either, because either way it is literally an act of racism AND colorism. and thanks for trusting urban dictionary dot com over a black girl telling you that ‘roach’ is in fact a racialized insult that has been used thousands and thousands of times against dark skinned black people (i even have the pictures to prove it!).

you’re literally calling a black person petty for being upset because i became a victim of racism. that is literally victim blaming. you just victim blamed me. you just told me to get over it and accept that someone just spewed an act of racism towards me. you would never say that to a victim of assault, or abuse, or cheating. you would never say “they didn’t mean to touch you there, they were drunk, so just accept that it was a mistake” to a victim of sexual harassment. you wouldn’t say “they didn’t mean to hit you with their car, so just accept that it was a mistake” or “they didn’t mean to call you out/fight you out in public, it just happened because of the timing, so just accept that it was a mistake.”

you wouldn’t say those stuff because you know shit like that can stressful and even traumatizing to whomever is facing it now. so what makes katie using a derogatory term on me any different? i was genuinely hurt and genuinely upset, and for you to straight up call me petty for that, is literally victim blaming . by you calling me petty is literally minimizing the extent of stress and hurt that i have experienced from being insulted by someone close to me. you say “katie is your friend” but you don’t realize that because katie is my friend literally made the act 10x more hurtful than any stranger could have done. you don’t expect the ones close to you to do something hurtful, so once they do the pain comes twice as hard.

we’ve already had a talk and you mentioned that we had similar believes whereas i disagreed. and honestly hannah, the disagreements we’ve had are on topics so heavy that i honestly don’t think i can handle carrying on a relationship who can’t see eye to eye with me. i’ve been thinking about this a LOT and i truly believe that cutting off our friendship is what’s best for us.

i’m willing to own up and apologize for freaking out on you earlier. it was 100% my fault because i totally misread your message and my ensued reaction was uncalled for and i apologize for putting you under all that stress for no reason.

but now i feel like our views are just so vastly different that i can’t see this friendship lasting very long. i definitely do not appreciate you calling me petty for reacting to a situation that is DEFINITELY NOT petty no matter which way one looks at it. and that was the breaking point.

i’m going to leave banter bus (after you respond to this) and possible sinvinteen because i also don’t believe that me and most/some of banter bus are on the same wavelength on certain topics, and that bothers me. it takes more than to just not be blatantly racist by using slurs, and waving flags or of the sorts, to well not be problematic. im not calling you guys horrible racists but unfortunately some of yall wont take the extra time to actually look into your actions and vocabulary and deconstruct any forms of slight bigotry or any sorts of -isms and figure out why y’all behave and say the things you do. and this has happened more than once with more than one of the gals in banter bus, but whenever i call you guys out on the things you say that might be problematic you guys kinda lock up n say “i didn’t mean it like that” but do yall take the time to figure out why you say/do it, if you didn’t mean it?

like with feesha and the holocaust/muslim thing. did she ever stop to wonder why the mass murder of millions of jewish people was the first thing she thought to compare with/to islamophobia?

or with marie (who actually took it fine im just using it as an example) did she ever stop to wonder WHY the french phrase “penis for a brain” was an acceptable phrase to use when talking about acts of infidelity when there are millions of trans women who already suffer the effects because of such cissexist language when they 100% do NOT have a penis for a brain, whatever that means.

and more. like yall get burdened when i call you guys out on such facts rather than taking the time to actually listen. like yall would rather just take part of the superficial issues of the world and think that thats good enough of you rather than going in dismantling problematic ideations inside you.

and to be honest, i need more friends who are the latter rather than the former. ://

i’m not going to do anything now, but i really need you to read this and think hard before shooting me a reply. but its pretty obvious that we are miles apart in how we go about handling such heavy topics so i can already assume the worst for your response.