#don't ask me what direction this is supposed to be going in becaue i have zero ideas

[perseusjackson-jasongrace]

Ma'am- how dares thou leave us off on a cliffhanger for both Empires on the Horizon and Kingdom Collisions V >:L I demand to know whats going to happen next!! (also take your time to write them lol )

Ah my friend you are right I am sorry for being so rude😭👀here's a Kingdom Collisions update. Please forgive me?🥺

Y’all know the drill by now. This is a fic i’m writing to try incorporate more descriptions into my writing. I do not have pre-written chapters so we’re both lost on what comes next or when the next update will be?! Please enjoy!

masterlist

TW: Suicide mention

Kingdom Collisions VI

Once upon a time in a land known for water and jewels there lived a young boy. He had skin the colour of soil and eyes the colour of oceans and were your gaze to ever fall upon this little figure you knew the earth was created just for him. The boy lived in a white-stone castle, surrounded by guards in clanking silver armour and blue-feathered helmets. Swords gleamed with their newness. They are decoration, a rite of passage. They only reflect the water. Children darted between their legs as they swoppeed shifts and if you looked closely the boy was often one of them. The castle stood proud and tranquil in the kingdom and gave the people hope.

If the white walls stand tall the queen will rise above all. 

A piece of poetry long since washed away.That single line ran through the city streets like rain water. Ran into people's homes, and under the wheels of rumbling cars. Generations had forgotten the poem to time but that line for it's power and rhyme had weathered the changing tides. If you listened closely the trees still knew the words. But nobody ever heard. The world was too busy and the day too new to remember what it was like to become one with evergreens.

Percy Jackson wakes up with a gasp, heart beating like conga drums. His fingers curl into his chest, leaving red marks as he winces sleep away. The world is still pitch black; stars hidden behind a blanket of storms. He wonders if they find comfort wrapped in the clouds. If those white puffs feel as soft as they look. Sleep is faraway, a distant friend stuck at a cold airport terminal. So he drifts to the window, ignoring the wind prickling his skin and sits down at the bench. The chiffon curtains rustle softly, talking to him in a language he hasn't quite yet learned. He knows they're saying something important. They must be if they brush against his legs every few minutes. Everyone is always trying to tell him something important. Something life changing and groundbreaking. He wishes he could pause time for a little while. Stroll through the gardens and into the ocean without anybody running after him.

The curtain drifts towards him again and he sighs as if the universe has made him designated driver. An unwanted, unwilling task.

Somewhere a bird caws and he snorts softly, "Okay, okay. I'm handling it."

He let's the sounds of the wind take him through the endless corridors, let's it carry him like a dying flower, like autumn leaves, like bonfire embers. The stone floor is cold under his bare feet and his body is littered with bumps. He misses the warmth of his castle. Misses the warmth of the hearth in every room and the smell of the sea that drifts in through open windows. Mostly, especially, he misses his mom. There is something distinctly missing from the Castle of Caelum. He hasn't quite put his finger on it but it doesn't feel right.

He doesn't have time to delve into that thought because all at once everything goes quiet. A large door looms before him.

"So this is it huh?" His voice is soft, afraid to disrupt the silence.

Taking a deep breath, filling up his lungs with the air of the Kingdom of Wind, he knocks on the wood. It is gentle and solitary and he's almost certain no-one heard it but his ears perk up anyway. He knows you can't pick up footfalls on stone but it doesn't stop his heart from racing in anticipation. The door opens with a soft click and tired eyes look at him.

"Percy," Jason's voice is raspy with crying and his heart shatters.

"Hey, can I come in?"

The blonde looks at him, brows furrowed and tear stains carved into his cheeks. Percy can see the tiredness in the prince's bones, like x-rays of exhaustion. He's about to say nevermind, about to walk away, walk past his own chambers and into the lifeless night. But the Prince nods once and moves aside.

He feels almost disappointed that he couldn't escape. Disappointed he couldn't just go back and never return. His mother's voice flitters into his head.

When your people are suffering you must lie down with them and ask them to tell you their story.

Why mom?

Because little one when the time comes you will know what to do.

How momma?

We are made of stories little one. We are made of all the things people tell us. Our dreams and hopes and memories are just threads in a tapestry and every person is connected to it.

I don't understand momma?

She smiled at him, perfect white teeth and dark blue eyes: When you think of me little one, what comes to mind?

Ten year old Percy frowned, Chocolate chip cookies, and your bedtime tales, and the beach, and hugs.

And what do you think about Grover?

Percy's green eyes had lit up like the sun: Play time and movies and ice-cream!

She laughed: And what about Dad?

His little brows furrowed: Fancy clothes and swords and paper and cuddles.

And Princess Piper?

His nose scrunched up: Cooties! He squealed and then he was running around the room; the world a flowing river, him a little fish learning its current.

You see little one, you didn't think about bones or skin or blood. You thought of memories and stories. Do you understand now?

He nodded as he scrambled into her lap: I think so momma. So if my people tell me who they are I can use their stories to help them when they're sore?

Almost little one. Half of hurt is because nobody listens. If you just listen to what your people are saying they will not hurt so much.

Is that because we have to tell our stories momma?

"Exactly. That is how we live. And live on."

Prince Perseus Jackson takes a deep breath and steps into the room. Immediately he can feel the icy wind, so much colder up here, stinging his bare arms, chest, legs. Save for the small silk boxers covering his most sensitive parts his body is exposed to the brutal temperatures and he cannot hide a shiver as he settles on the couch. The fire has died long ago, maybe not even put on for the night, if the grey ashes and lack of heat are indication enough.

"What are you doing here?" The blonde prince looks at him.

"The curtains told me to come."

"What?" He can hear the confusion, but more than that the weight of a thousand heartaches.

He wonders if every person who has their heartbroken feels like they're the first to ever go through it. If that feeling is so perfectly human it feels unique and special to each one.

"Sometimes the world talks to me and sometimes I listen."

"I don't really know what game you're playing but I'm not in the mood so if it isn't an emergency," Those eyes are ice blue, "And I honestly wouldn't care even if it was, please get out."

"I cannot." He shrugs and pulls a velvet blanket over him.

"I'd appreciate," Jason's teeth grit, "If you respected my boundaries enough to leave. I am not in the mood."

"The window is open, there is paper sitting on the desk and many crumpled pieces on the floor, and I can see you haven't even sat on your bed, never-mind slept in it. What do you plan to do Grace?"

"You know what." That voice is hard, malicious with fear, pain.

"I will not leave. And you will not either. You can sit there on your bed hating me till the sun graces us once more. You can punch me until I am the same colour as the dusk but I am not leaving."

"I hate you. Leave me alone." He can hear the tears hit the cold stone. He doesn't react. A shadow blocks the moonlight finally peaking through the clouds.

"I said leave me the fuck alone!"

"I cannot do that Prince."

"Don’t call me that." He snaps, pushing his face into Percy's, "Go away! I want to be alone."

"I can't Jason,"

"JUST LEAVE!" Golden fists pound at his chest, droplets of salt soaking into his skin, as if trying to wash away the bruising.

He grabs his husband's hands gently and pulls him to the couch.

"I'm not going to leave you."

"They all left." Jason gasps, "They left. HE LEFT!"

The scream draws blood from his ears, pulls oxygen from his veins.

"I'm here. I'm not leaving. I am here."

"Please," Sobs wrack that broken body, and Percy can feel the first cracks in a kingdom. "Please don't leave me. Please, please please."

He rubs his hand over a shaking back and mutters over and over again, "I will not leave you."

Prince Jason Grace cries a new ocean and he names it after the fire that caused it. When the sun peaks over the horizon, fracturing a wall of crystal, and attempting to warm those cold grey stones, Percy Jackson takes his husband to bed and ignores the fissures running under his feet.

Once upon a time in a kingdom known for storms and gold there lived a little boy. He had eyes of lightning and skin the colour of sunlight and if you ever caught a glimpse of him you knew only the darkest nights could ever produce something so beautiful. The guards are bathed in riches, weighed down by diamonds cut from dreams and earrings weighted with the pureness of gold. Swords are varied and prized. Bred for fodder. Used at will. He lived in a castle made of grey stone and it loomed over the kingdom like a black cloud. The people looked at it and shied away. For they too had a poem about their crown but they remembered every line. 

Those who fell under the shadow of stone were sure to be left to ruin by their king and cursed forever alone. A young boy with hair spun from starlight is trapped inside. Who will save him if he cannot hide?

Forgetting was a death warrant.

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Tags (if you want to be added to/ taken off the tag list just let me know, all my channels of communication are open):

@nishlicious-01

@queen-of-demons-and-hell

@leydiangelo

@sparkythunderstorm

@asami-sato-has-never-sinned

[guiltypleasurefandomface]

They were all at the end of their tethers, especially Brian. The dopey look on Roger's face, the waxing lyrical of Emily, the way his head turned everytime someone went by... especially if they went by and they had red hair.

"Rog," Freddie said, "It's just the WRVS lady with the tea, calm down will you?"

"It could have been Emily." Roger replied mullishly.

Brian felt his nostrils flare as he breathed in. "You don't even know Emily."

"But I burn inside to know her!" Roger exploded, standing up. "My heart thrums at her name. The world is perfect for having Emily in it, at last. It's fate, it's true love-"

"It's a bloody spell you've had put on you, you idiot! Sit down, will you? You don't even like read heads!" Brian snaps, and feels instant regret at the way Roger looks at him, sitting down slowly, clearly hurt by his words. "I'm sorry, I-"

"Roger Taylor?"

Their heads all snap up over in the direction of the nurse calling Roger's name.

"Here!" Freddie says, and then pulls Roger up. "I'll go with him, Brian. You stay here and wait for John."

Chastened, Brian nods and watches as Roger and Freddie go with the nurse.

-

"That was bloody wierd!" is the very first thing Roger says to Brian and John when he comes back out of the treatment room, looking a bit dishevelled and quite tired.

"Are you all... fixed, now?" Brian asks uneasily.

"Oh yes!" Freddie says, just trailing behind him. "They made absolutely sure of it. He had to drink a foul smelling concoction and then stand there in his skivvies as they did a removal spell on him. No trace of any magic spells left in his blood. Certainly no traces of Emily."

"I don't even know her!" Roger cried.

"That's what I said!" Brian cried back.

"Er, fellas?" John said, "Maybe we should continue this chat somewhere else? Maybe in the car? The receptionists are starting to glare."

-

"It feels like it was all a dream." Roger said, between slurps of tea. "I can remember bits of it but it doesn't make sense now. I remember feeling very happy one minute, then very sad, and there was a face in my mind and even though there was a voice in the back of my mind telling me it was all wrong, I wanted to see that face." He paused thoughtfully, "Emily's I assume. We'll have to ban her from gigs."

"And the market." John said.

"Hmm..."

"I called Miami, and Harris," John said, looking between Roger, Freddie and Brian, "I told them to keep an eye out for any redheads at any gigs or interviews, and to get me or Freddie so we can see if it's her or not."

"Good idea." Brian said, not bothered he wasn't one of the ones to go to. He didn't really see her, or at least not her face. Just that she'd gone up to Roger and a second later he had reeled back. And he'd gone over before she could get Roger to go off with her.

"You were right about one thing, though." Roger said, looking at Brian.

"Was I? When?"

It was so out of character for Brian to question himself being right, that John and Freddie couldn't help but give him a double take for it.

"It's been a very confusing morning!" Brian said, in his defence.

"When you said I don't even like redheads." Roger said.

Brian's mouth fell open. "I thought you couldn't remember anything!"

"I said I could remember bits of it. That's one bit I remember."

"I'm really sorry," Brian said, quite apologetically, "I was very worried and stressed when I shouted at you. It was like looking after a very demanding puppy with no self awareness and I just reached a limit."

Freddie snorted in to his tea.

"Thanks." Roger said, flatly. "I've been described worse, I suppose."

"You've been described better, too." John added, unhelpfully.

"But you were right." Roger repeated. "I don't normally go for redheads."

Brian nodded, not sure as to what to say to that.

"I've been going for brunettes, lately."

John spat his tea out back into his cup.

Brian looked over at John, worried, and then looked back at Roger, confused.

"Curly haired brunettes."

Brian was glad he didn't have a mouth of tea because he might have spat it out back into his cup, too. He risked a glance at Freddie, who seemed to be hiding his face in his bone china tea cup, or at least hiding his laughter, and not doing a very good job of it.

"Not Freddie, you berk!" Roger said, and gently shoved his shoulder. You!"

"Me?"

"Christ you're impossible."

"It's been a very confusing morning!" Brian repeated, "I'm going to need a few minutes to process."

"Well don't take too long, yeah? I'd like to go on a date with you by the time we're fifty."

It was Brian's turn to smile dopily now. "You want to go on a date with me?"

"By the time we're fifty, yes." Roger replied dryly.

"That would be lovely." Brian said, unable to contain the bubble of happiness wanting to burst out.

"Maybe we should take Brian to the hospital this time. He's got the same look on his face Roger had four hours ago." John stage whispered to Freddie.

"Oh don't pretend you're not a romantic." Freddie said. "Besides, I've been waiting four years for this moment."

"Maybe you should send Emily a thank you card then." Roger suggested.

"Don't you dare!" Brian said, "She'll probably return it to sender with a curse put on it."

[bythemotorway]

A conversation with an engineer from Auckland Transport

Me: Hello

AT: Hello? Is this [Non-motorist]?

Me: Yes, it is. Is this [senior engineer]?

AT: Yeah, yeah— how did you get my name, sorry?

Me: Uh, [other engineer] told me.

AT: Oh okay. That's— righto. He's not supposed to do that but that's quite okay. Um, so yeah, calling regarding Symonds Street. I understand you've discussed this with [other engineer] already—

Me: That's right.

AT: So how can I help?

Me: Uh, so… my discussion with [other engineer]— just to recap what happened…

AT: He's given me a good recap so I understand the situation, the vehicle's parking on the pavement.

Me: So he's already given you the briefing. Okay, so, um, why I was unsatisfied with that discussion I had with [other engineer] on the phone and the site visit is that he seemed to have a very different idea of risk and I wasn't— I actually found it quite difficult to point out the difficulty that people were having with the pedestrians crossing, even though he was standing right there and watching it. Um, so I think the prioritization that the issue is being given is not appropriate. Uh, and at the same time, the other aspect of this is that this is a multi-factor kind of situation and I don't think [other engineer] was able to recognize that—

AT: What didn't he recognize? What do you not think he recognized?

Me: Well he tried to refer it to parking enforcement services as an illegal parking issue, but—

AT: That's absolutely correct and I'll back him up— yeah, so, in terms of any infrastructure and so forth that you have suggested or you think may be appropriate… bollards or something to physically prevent people parking there, that's not something we'd consider here because there's nothing— it's very clear, that it's a footpath. Like there's a— the kerb and channel is fully constructed. Uh, so there's nothing in infrastructure that would suggest to someone that it's a place that they should park— that they can legally park. So as with any legal footpath where you're not allowed to park, it's an enforcement issue. So all I can do is reinfoce what [other engineer] said to you previously. Uh, please do call for enforcement. I'll also go and talk to the parking enforcement manager, uh, now, if he's still here, or else tomorrow…

Me: Did he— did he—?

AT: So there is evidence, I've seen photos of people parking there, so we don't want that happening, I agree, but the mechanism for deal—

Me: Yep, okay, but did he—?

AT: The mechanism to deal with that is through parking enforcement, okay?

Me: I'm just— I'm just wondering, did he convey what our response was to that?

AT: Pardon me?

Me: Did he convey what our response was to that suggestion?

AT: Ah, no, what was that?

Me: Um, that—

AT: He may have, but I can't recall.

Me: Ah, that we've already tried enforcement multiple times—

AT: Yeah, abs—

Me: And the trouble is that—

AT: Absolutely, cool, so—

Me: It's a recurring issue.

AT: Yep, sure, so I suspect that most of it are recidivist people that are parking there, it's not a place that you would typically park. So I suspect that the people that are doing it, are doing it, um, continually themselves, like it would be a select number of people that are doing it, possibly associated with the shops there. Um, so if we can get some enforcement out there, and if you can advise particular times of day that it's a bigger issue, by all means let me know now, and I can try and have that enforcement targeted.

AT: So as opposed to being completely reactive, whereby they get out there and people may have moved on, um, if we can— I can ask that the parking enforcement people be a bit more proactive around going out at certain times, as opposed to being requested, um, then that— hopefully that might be able to help resolve the issue.

Me: That is what we've done though. And that's what I'm saying that there's, uh—

AT: Yeah, so you've c—

Me: Multiple factors— one factor is that. The other factor is that the design invites people to park there.

AT: How— how does the design invite people to park there? There's nothing— I've— I've drove— I've driven down there many times, there's nothing there, like there's no— in terms of the kerb and channel and so forth, what would suggest someone could park there by driving up and over a formed kerb and channel?

Me: Uh, there's a couple of things. One is the dimensions of the space, it quite neatly fits the number of cars that they park there. And it suggests that because it's quite wide, that they can park there without getting in the way of pedestrians.

Me: So when they do the parking— of their cars, they think they're actually doing the right thing because they're not blocking the paths of pedestrians, I mean they know—

AT: Nah they— anybody parking there, anybody parking there knows they're doing so illegally, I guarantee it. Like they know that they've— if you've got no kerb ramp to go up, and there's no vehicle crossing, and you're having to physically run up—

Me: Well— yep, or—

AT: Run up over with your vehicle, two wheels up, four wheels up, and so forth, so yeah, okay.

Me: Yeah, yeah, so having witnessed how they do it, um, they enter through the— either the, uh, pedestrian crossing ramp at the slip lane, or at the—

AT: Yep.

Me: Vehicle entrance just before that.

Me: So they can easily mount the footpath, and they think that that's sufficient for them to just keep out of the way, as long as they're not literally in the direct path of the pedestrians—

AT: Again, yep—

Me: And that's true, they don't block the footpath, there's about—

AT: Nah—

Me: A metre and a half or two metres that they leave clear for pedestrians to keep walking, so the risk is actually from the, uh, limited visibility you get for oncoming traffic when you're further downstream. So, that's the bit that they don't get, they don't see that they're blocking visibility of oncoming traffic, they—

AT: Look, yeah, look, irrespective of what they think— irrespective of what they think—

Me: Yeah yeah yeah, no I'm still— well, yeah, sorry you can't say "irrespective of what they think" because that's what I mean when I say—

AT: Please let me— please let me finish. I'm saying, irrespective of what the driver thinks, in terms of whether or not they're blocking it, I— I agree they shouldn't be parking there

Me: Yeah—

AT: Absolutely, I agree with you in that sense. However, there's nothing infrastructurally that we'd to do prevent them because it's not required—

Me: Hang on, hang on, hang on, this is—

AT: Nah, please let me finish, otherwise I'm gonna— I'm going to terminate the conversation if you do not let me finish, sir.

AT: All I'm saying is we're agreeing with you, that vehicles shouln't have parked there, we would not physically put— put barriers up there. Number one, bollards are also an impediment to visually-impaired pedestrians, so we only put them where absolutely necessary. We don't do it to deter illegal behaviour that is clearly wilful. So anybody parking there, particularly if they're driving up the pedestrian ramp at the crossing, as you suggested they're doing, they know that they're doing something they shouldn't be doing—

Me: Hang on, so—

AT: Okay, so— er— okay, so— that's our position, so as I said before, probably won't have a chance now, because this convers—

Me: Can I get a chance—

AT: You have had many chances, I don't think if you— unless you're going to say something—

Me: Wh— in response to what you've just said, though.

AT: Go for it.

Me: Cause you've used the keyword "irrespective of what the driver thinks" but my proposition is that the design invites drivers to do things, which means that it does matter—

AT: No, no.

Me: What the driver thinks.

AT: Well, my professional opinion and that of the senior engineer who has been there is that it does not do so. A wide footpath does not say you should park here. A wide footpath is providing an added amenity to pedestrians and other road users who are using it, so there's nothing about it. And you— you've made the point yourself, so you're contradicted in the sense that to drive up and over the, um, at the veh— the pedestrian crossing point where the kerb is lowered, and then there's the— um, tactile pavers, it's clearly a pedestrian crossing point and the vehicles are crossing there as you said you see they do and which is how they access the site. It's clearly illegal and it's clearly willful and it's clearly deliberate.

AT: So I will work with parking enforcement, and I'll talk— I can talk with the police as well—I've a liaison meeting—that we don't want people parking here, of course we don't. Um, and the fact they are, we don't want them to be parking there. So and I agree with you in that sense, we're not going to put any infrastructure in to do it, becaues it's not necessary, we don't— otherwise, you know, you can put up— put bollards up throughout the city—

Me: Suppose—

AT: To prevent people parking where they shouldn't.

Me: Suppose I accept that proposition, that, uh, it's not necessary—

AT: Well it's not necessary, so that's— so it's a fact.

Me: I accept that it's your position, and suppose I accept as well. Um, my question then is, following on from that, how do you intend to test it, or how can I be— able to test it in an objective way, so I can come back to you and say "yes it's worked, good job, and enforcement is sufficient", or how can I come back and say, "enforcement hasn't proved to work"— like, what's the test here?

AT: Well the test is that the people that are ticketed there no longer park there. And I suggest— so, if you have particular vehicles then by all means call in the registration numbers if you have, or if you see them accessing particular businesses and that they're doing it— if you— if you see it as regularly as it sounds like you do, you're probably privy to that information so by all means let us know, and put it— and make it for the attention of parking enforcement and then hopefully it will get to them sooner rather than coming through this mechanism.

Me: Ah, well okay, so let's say I come back in four weeks time and given it some time for enforcement to take effect, and I still find that there's a chronic issue of people parking there, are you suggesting I go back to enforcement and say, "do more enforcement"? Or what?

AT: Yep, absolutely, yes.

Me: Uh, but if— so that'll be three strikes then, I— I've— I've kind of done the more enforcement thing already, given it a chance—

AT: Yep, you've done all that you can do. Um, I'm satisfied that no pedestrians have been injured because of it but I still don't want people parking there, so we're not gonna— again, physical infrastructure— again, as we manage the— the network across the city we need to be consistent, what we do here we have to then be able to justify not doing elsewhere for the same reason— for lots of different reasons it's just not warranted. Again, we don't want people parking there, they shouldn't be, if enforcement doesn't work, if they're not doing enough, I can ask for them to do more, so that's where we're at.

Me: Ah, so th—

AT: Okay?

Me: That's a terminal condition, you're saying we just go in a loop with o— parking enforcement services over and over again—

AT: A— As with anywhere on the network, illegal parking needs to be dealt with by our parking enforcement team. And they are stretched at times but give— given—

Me: But you— you also don't recognise the multi-factor issue that there's actually a coincidence of other things happening at the same time, that the design invites parking, that the pedestrians line of sight—

AT: No, I— I absolutely disag— I— yeah, no— the design doesn't invite parking on the footpath, you're completely wrong on that point, I must say. Um, that's a moot point. The design absolutely—I drive there frequently—does not invite people to park on the footpath. Yes, it's a wide footpath, and— but it doesn't—

Me: You say that despite the fact that people actually do it?

AT: Absolutely. Completely.

Me: So the evidence that people are parking there is not, in your view—

AT: No you— no, so look, you're not— you— please listen if we're going to continue this conversation. You said yourself, that people drive up the pedestrian ramp to access this area, did you not?

Me: Yeah, that's right.

AT: Yeah, you did. So people— the pedestrian ramp— the, um— corresponding infrastructure, the tactile pav— that's clearly not a vehicle crossing, is it?

Me: One of them is.

AT: Pardon?

Me: Uh, one of them is. So on one side there's a pedestrian ramp, you're right, tactile pavers and everything, on the other side is a vehicle crossing.

AT: Yep. So it's a vehicle crossing, so is it a driveway, it's an access?

Me: Yep, that's right, one of them is.

AT: Yep, cool, exactly. So as with any other driveway. So throughout the city, do you see anywhere where people see a driveway and say, "okay I'm going to park on the footpath here"?

Me: Yup.

AT: Where?

Me: Er, do you want me to tell you a million—?

AT: Yep, no no, there is, then that's cool, so it's clearly willful. So people are doing it deliberately, so by all means call for enforcement in those places. I'm going to have to go sorry, because we're getting— you're not going to get much further here. But I will as I suggested talk to parking enforcement tomorrow, it's too late now, then hopefully—

Me: One last question, one last question— just a procedural issue. Um so, if I'm not satisfied with this phone call, can I escalate this any further?

AT: Uh, I'll talk to my manager but I suspect that this won't go any further.

Me: Uh—

AT: Cause there's nothing more— there's nothing more that we can do.

Me: Can I talk to someone? Like wh—

AT: Pardon? You have— you've just escalated, this is the escalation process.

Me: Yep, so what's the next step in the escalation process—

AT: And we're gonna— and I agree with my senior engineer in that we're gonna attempt to address it via parking enforcement.

Me: Okay, um—

AT: So yes, so by all means if you're not satisfied that parking enforcement has not dealt with this over the course of the next period of time then by all means call back and escalate again.

Me: Um, how do I—

AT: I'm gonna have— I'm gonna have to go, I'm afraid. I'm gonna have to terminate this call— we're not getting—

Me: No hang on—

AT: We're not getting any further, I'm— I'm afraid you've not been listening very—

Me: I just want to know how do I go to the next step here, where do I go to—

AT: Um I've talked with our customer feedback team regarding escalation issues because I know you raise a lot of issues with us. Um and so this one I don't consider, um, requires it at that time. If you want to then by all means you can write in again and if you— if you choose to do that then I won't see the need to go through this process with parking enforcement, but I'm happy to do that. And if you don't see a resolution then by all means raise it again.

Me: Uh, with customer services?

AT: Yes.

Me: Okay, so that's what you're suggesting, that if— if I'm not happy with this procedure that's ongoing at the moment, I should go to customer services and raise a new issue?

AT: I can't hear you anymore if you're still there.

Me: Uh, are you suggesting that if I'm not satisfied with the way the procedure is working out at the moment, that I should go to customer services and raise a new issue or complaint or something? Is that it?

AT: So you have the number associated with this one?

Me: The case number? Yup.

AT: So by all means, as we discussed before, the process to go through there is such that we will— I will, try and get some targeted enforcement, not—

Me: Yeah, got it.

AT: Excuse me—reactive— excuse me, as it has possibly been in the past. If you're not satisfied that over the next few months that addresses the issue then by all means call back and we can escalate it then.

Me: Er, cite this case number? So this— this will not be closed?

AT: Uh, I can close it but it can still be added to, they can reopen it.

Me: Er, I've literally just been on the phone with a different case and they said if it's closed they can't add anything to it.

AT: Okay, I'm not sure who you spoke to, but anyhow.

Me: Er, that was the customer services call centre.

AT: Okay. Irres— irrespective, I don't need to close the case— well, I do, we'll close the case, otherwise it stays open forever.

Me: You will? Okay.

AT: But by all means when you come back quote the same number so it gets linked to that same case.

Me: Okay, I see what you mean, okay.

AT: Okay? Okay, thank you.

Me: Okay, I appreciate the call, um, but I have to say, frankly, I'm unsatisfied with the outcome here.

AT: Oh— clearly you are but what you are doing— I mean, it's like— for what reason though? Like I agree that we don't want people parking there and we're doing what we can with our current mechanisms to try and deal with that. So what is that you are not satisfied with? Cause I do feel like you're being very unreasonable.

Me: Um I'm particularly not satisfied with the— uh, failure to recognise that there a design issue here that needs a—

AT: Well there is no— there is not— absolutely there is not a design issue here. I don't know, are you a professional— are you professional engineer my sir— my friend?

Me: I grant— I grant— I grant that's your p—

AT: How long have you been doing traffic engineering for?

Me: I grant that is your position— I grant that's your position, that's fine. I'm just saying that that—

AT: Pardon?

Me: I grant that that is your position. Um, you don't need to repeat that—

AT: But— but— but on what basis are you saying that's a design flaw when you're disputing the two trained engineers? When I suspect that you're not.

Me: Er, I'll be happy to go through it step by step, but you seem to be in a hurry and not interested in listening—

AT: No no, you have you've gone through it all, I've not gone— you've met—

Me: I've barely scratched the surface—

AT: You've met [other engineer], I can see, I know the area well, I go there frequently, and there's nothing, to me, that says you should— people should be parking on the footpath, which is what you're saying— which is kind of what you're saying.

Me: The one thing I have on my side is the evidence that drivers are actually feeling invited and they do it, so—

AT: No they are not feeling invited, they are choosing to do it, people choose to speed and they choose to drink and drive, they are doing illegal behaviour willfully.

Me: Well I had this discussion with [other engineer] as well, where he said, for instance—it's just as an example—he said, if he was to install some kind of bench or something that that would block parking but would also be an amenity for pedestrians, that that would invite pedestrians to run into traffic from the bench, and that— that— therefore it's not a good idea. So he recognises that, for instance, that you can have infrastructure that invites certain kinds of behaviour, and—

AT: You can, absolutely you can, and we don't in this situation, so that's—

Me: Even if it's— even if it's an unintended consequence, the fact that the design kind of— enables it and gives them a really convenient way to do it—

AT: This— yep— but you— but in this case— that is no lon— that is not the situation. So, I apologise, but I'm not sure how long you've been doing this for but I've been doing it for eighteen to twenty years, so.

Me: I understand there is a contradiction there, that there's— I mean in the design it says, "don't park here". But I'm saying that there's— equally the design also says "kind of sort of, wink and a nudge, you can park here", and—

AT: No, no it doesn't at all. We're going around in circles, so anyhow, I'll talk to parking enforcement as advised, and, um, we'll leave it at that, okay?

Me: That's what I meant by— we're barely scratching the surface about this design issue. Um, if you—

AT: There is no design issue, so, if that's okay?

Me: If that's your starting—

AT: If you want— if you want to get some information from a— from a professional engineer and tell us what all the design issue are, by all means, but my professional opinion and that of [other engineer] and probably anyone else who looked at it, would be otherwise. There's nothing there that suggests that you should be parking in that location. A wide footpath does not say— a wide footpath, by definition, which is a— a increased amenity for pedestrians and ho— you know, vulnerable users of that sort, does not say "you should be parking here" just because it's wide enough.

AT: Absolutely it doesn't. I'm sorry, you're absolutely wrong, you are wrong, I apologise, I'm going to tell you that flatly.

AT: Um, but I don't think people should be parking there, I agree with you in that sense, and I will raise it with our parking enforcement team which is exactly the mechanism for us to deal with it—

Me: Well— well okay so—

AT: So I'm sorry, so I'm going to go, I don't want to hang up on you, I'm going to say goodbye—

Me: Hang on, why— why do you build fences for pedestrians where they don't have a crossing, like if there— there's nothing in the road that says "don't cross here" but you sometimes you build fences for pedestrians to prevent pedestrians from crossing there?

AT: Absolutely, sometimes it's necessary.

Me: Yeah, I— and I agree with you—

AT: Depends— depends on the location, it's very location-specific.

Me: There's nothing in the street, for instance, that says pedestrians are supposed to cross here, there's no crossing, there's no refuge, there's no zebra marking or anything. But still people feel invited to cross, and they do it, and you've taken a realistic approach in many cases as engineers, and you've built fences to prevent pedestrians from doing that.

AT: Well there's pros— pros and cons to pedestrian fences to be honest, but that—

Me: Yeah I agree, but in many cases you've come to the conclusion that it's required, which is probably appropriate—

AT: That's nothing to do with— that has nothing to do with this issue at all. It has no relevance whatsoever.

Me: Well it does have relevance in that it's a similar situation where driver behaviour is determined— you know, realistically they do something because they feel invited, then you put a fence up—

AT: No it's different, we're talking about illegal behaviour, a pedestrian—

Me: But a—

AT: A pedestrian crossing midblock is not illegal, provided do they do so safely.

Me: Not— not midblock. Near the— near the crossing, so within the 20 metres or whatever, but they still cross, like on Symonds Street near the, uh, K Road—

AT: We're talking about illegal behaviour, what— what people are doing in the situations you're talking about on Symonds Street are parking illegaly, that's completely different, and I'm going to— I'm going to go, it's been lovely talking to you—

Me: But hang on, pedestrians crossing are ill—

AT: I'm going to go, goodbye.

END