#especially b/c you don't know these blorbos. thank u

[multi-lefaiye]

hi hi hello I don't know very much at all about tftgs aside from You Like It So It Must Be Cool, can I mayhaps coax some Rosa Rambles out of you? :O

hi hello thank you that is very kind,,,,,,,, i'm running on Stress Stress Anxiety Brain rn so i don't know how coherent this will be but talking about blorbos helps me feel better so i will Attempt A Ramble.

the tl;dr for tftgs is that it's a horror-comedy series that i have been fixated on for a hot minute and that i am almost constantly rotating in the background of my mind. it is INCREDIBLY problematic™ in several ways and i do have a lot of issues with it

(namely its handling of disabled/neurodivergent characters and ableism is Not Great at the best of times, there are minor characters who use a lot of nasty derogatory language that makes me super uncomfy even though i Know they're at least not Celebrated for that and are condemned by the narrative, and also a lot of the characters are just fucking MEAN to each other)

but something about it scratches an itch in my brain that i didn't know was there. i love the characters (or at least my six faves, but there's a lot of others i adore even if they're not My Blorbos) so dearly and i am going to scoop them up and run away with them at high speeds to give them the happy endings they deserve.

this is also where i reveal i haven't actually finished reading the series in its entirety yet because i am a slow reader. i did rewrite chapter one of the first book tho as like a writing exercise, and i posted some of that here if anyone wants to check that out (shameless self promo). (No pressure or obligation tho)

okay rosa rosa rosa my beloved darling rosa. i am going to talk about some of my headcanons for rosa and also share some of my favorite Rosa Moments in the series. i will put this all under the cut b/c idk how long this will be <3 i will avoid spoilers as much as possible in case anyone reading this wants to maybe check out the series (though if you do feel free to reach out for like. a list of relevant triggers/content warnings, b/c i am happy to provide).

ROSA VASQUEZ my darling. okay so rosa is a character introduced in the second book, and she is a d e l i g h t. like... the whole series centers around a group of people who work at a shitty gas station next to a shitty small town, and rosa is introduced as one of the newest employees at the gas station.

rosa is just. baby. and i don't mean that in an infantilizing way, i mean that in an I Love This Character way.

she's introduced as this incredibly sweet, bubbly gal who's excited to work at the gas station despite the fact that the people there keep treating her like shit even before she's hired. i'm not going to talk about calvin ambrose (a minor character in book two) in depth but i am going to hunt him for sport for being both sexist AND racist towards rosa. and for other reasons but that's a big one.

one of my favorite things about rosa is that like... the protagonist, jack, misses her first day of work SEVERAL times and so he can't train her!!! and eventually she gets so fed up that she comes to confront him! because rosa is a sweetheart but also she stands up for herself and others and I LOVE THAT.

and of course she's not mean but she does tell him off BUT when she finds out he had uh. very important and understandable reasons. she apologizes and he apologizes and anyway rosa and jack being nice to each other and being friends. it brings me joy.

and anyway rosa ends up telling jack that she's not going to work at the gas station actually, and she and jack wish each other well.

BUT S I K E HER NEW WORKPLACE ~MYSTERIOUSLY BURNS DOWN~ AND JACK'S BOSS TELLS HIM ABOUT IT BEFORE THE NEWS KNOWS ABOUT IT. AND THEN TELLS HIM TO MAKE SURE ROSA WORKS AT THE GAS STATION. WEIRD VIBES BUT OK!!!

anyway ok actual favorite rosa moments.

my favorite rosa moments from book two:

when jack is training her on and she is taking Super Careful Notes in a little notepad and taking the job Very Seriously

when jack runs out of things to train her on and she ends up like. deep cleaning the gas station out of frustration.

when she finds the box of videogames in the closet and gets REALLY EXCITED until she finds two dead mice in there. and then she asks jack if they can hold a funeral for the mice.

the mice funeral, where rosa gives an adorable and heartfelt eulogy for the mice

"rosa i'm sorry but you were floating off the ground and chanting in a voice that wasn't your own and we panicked" "oh. i'm sorry. i didn't mean to."

rosa just. she brings me joy. she is a delightful breath of fresh air in this series and even though jack is my All Time Favorite, rosa is up there too.

anyway uhhh some Rosa Headcanons That I Believe Are Canon And You Can't Tell Me Otherwise:

rosa is trans. i refuse to entertain arguments about this. how do i know? i just know.

she is also really short!!! she and jack are both incredibly tiny and everyone else is tall

i headcanon rosa as a biromantic asexual mainly b/c that's what i headcanon jack as, and i think the idea of them having that Solidarity is a super cute concept.

i like the idea of jack and rosa as having a kind of sibling-type bond. that's my ideal relationship dynamic with them.

rosa is implied to be one of the youngest/probably The youngest member of the main cast so i like to think she's a somewhat recent college grad who's just trying her best.

she absolutely likes baking. you cannot convince me otherwise.

in my AUs and such, rosa has a cat. he is a sphinx cat and his name is Mister.

okay this is long but uhhh last thing i will share. i do have some Art of rosa but tbh i'm not super happy with it </3 i will instead share a meme i made with tupperbot with rosa. a quote that i think sums her up as a character.

[Image Description: A screenshot of a discord message created with tupperbot. The message is from Rosa Vasquez, and reads: "I'm a nice person, but I'm about to start throwing rocks at people." End ID.]