#halobuck

[purelyundecided]

While i think gatekeeping someone from calling themself a gamer is dumb generally i do still think that on a fundamental level the vast majority of mobile games are not games, they are interactive ads.

If i died in halo and the game made me watch a 30 second ad to respawn and limited me to 5 respawns a day if i dont buy more respawns with halobucks. Thats not a game anymore and nobody would play it, its a money farm designed fully with the intention of holding your attention just long enough to show you as many ads and microtransactions as they can to make a quick buck off of dumb people that are easily amused by them.

[findingjoynweirdstuff]

Dream SMP Recap (April 26/2021) - L’Sandburg

Foolish and Puffy are both reeling from the events of the Red Banquet. Foolish confronts a familiar foe in his mind while Puffy works through her grief.

After Foolish’s lore, Bad, Antfrost, Purpled, HBomb and Foolish get involved in a new conflict, as Bad declares his  walled-off tollbooth on Foolish’s road a new nation called “L’Sandburg.” Foolish, mad that Bad would attempt to occupy a spot on his land, intervenes. Bad ends up declaring war.

Later, after things settle, Puffy is invited to L’Sandburg but instead attempts to take over the nation, declaring it “L’Puffburg.”

---

VOD LINKS:

Foolish

Captain Puffy

---

- There’s a flashback to the Red Banquet from Foolish’s perspective, watching as Puffy and Antfrost argue.

- As Foolish dies, the screen goes black. The Egg speaks.

"YOU WILL NOT ESCAPE ME AGAIN.”

- Foolish gasps and wakes in the green beacon light within the Temple of Undying. He’s confused -- he’s immortal. But that was different.

The Egg makes noises, then speaks -- but not in reverse.

“I...am..in your mind...”

“I am IN YOUR SOUL.”

“No, no no no no, this is -- this is just tricks! Games! This is just something new!”

“IT IS NOT A TRICK.”

“Is this -- is this the Egg? It’s tough to forget a voice like that.”

“CALL ME WHAT YOU WANT. I HAVE MANY NAMES AS YOU KNOW, BUT YOU’VE FORGOTTEN.”

“What do you mean? No no no, I have never heard you before, it wasn’t that long ago that I first met you. You’re something new, something I’ve never met before.”

“I AM AN ANCIENT ONE. EVEN MORE ANCIENT THAN YOU.”

“So I guess...I guess I was wrong -- I’m not afraid of you! Even after all that, I am still not afraid.”

“AFRAID? YOU ARE TRULY FOOLISH IF YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE STRONGER THAN ME! YOU SHOULD BE AFRAID.”

“Maybe...maybe I had it wrong. Maybe I thought I was stronger. But...but I’m still here! I’m still here. And where are you? How’d that Banquet go?”

“FOOLISH...WHEN WE MET, YOU SAID YOU FEARED NOTHING. BUT NOW? I CAN SENSE YOUR FEAR, FOOLISH.”

“No...no.”

“YOU FEAR DEATH ITSELF, DON’T YOU?”

“No, no...you don’t know! You don’t know anything about me!”

“I...KNOW WHO YOU ARE...EVEN THOUGH...YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN SOME OF WHAT YOU ARE.”

“And? Enlighten me, tell me something. Tell me something that only I would know!”

“I KNOW...OF YOUR SECRET PLACE THAT YOU HAVE TOLD OF NO OTHER!”

“Be more specific.”

“FOOLISH...I KNOW WHAT YOU KEEP IN THERE. FOOLISH...”

“You could be lying. Where?”

“HOW CAN I BE LYING, WHEN I CAN HEAR YOUR VERY THOUGHTS?”

“How do I get you out of my head? I’m not -- you’re still trying to get me to join your side, that’s not gonna happen!”

“FOOLISH...YOU ARE WEAK! FOOLISH. YOU ARE CAPABLE OF SO MUCH MORE! BUT YOU CHOOSE PEACE. AND YOU WASTE YOUR DAYS BUILDING...PATHETIC. YOU HAVE MORE POWER THAN YOU KNOW.”

“No...no, you have it wrong! I’ve tried that, okay? I’ve tried power in the past and it doesn’t work! It doesn’t work. You can’t just use overwhelming force. It worked for short term at best.”

“POWER! POWER IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS, FOOLISH! YOU OF ALL SHOULD KNOW THAT. HOW ELSE CAN YOU SAVE YOURSELF FROM DYING, FOOLISH?”

“You think...you think I’m weak? You think there’s strength -- there’s strength in what I do! Let me explain to you. Let me explain to you why I build.”

“Before, I was reckless and wild. I used to believe wielding godlike powers and a sword gave me some sort of control. But it all led me down a path of violence, and anger, mistrust. I can’t control the actions of the world through overwhelming power. It doesn’t work, just doesn’t. But building provides two important elements in my life. Creation and control...”

- Foolish walks back to the mainland as the Egg continues to speak with him.

- Foolish heads to Church Prime as the Egg keeps asking to join him. It says that it knows about Foolish’s deal with Ranboo.

“Hm. So maybe you do know something. Which is all the more reason I need to be rid of you. And you can go back to whatever dark abyss of the Nether you came from!”

“FOOLISH, STOP. WHY ARE WE FIGHTING? IT’S NOT TOO LATE FOR YOU TO JOIN ME. I WILL MAKE YOU STRONG AGAIN. DEEP DOWN YOU MISS THE POWER YOU ONCE HELD. 

GO BACK TO BEING A TOTEM OF DEATH, AND TOGETHER, WE CAN RULE AND CREATE PEACE. PEACE IS WHAT YOU WANT. RIGHT, FOOLISH?”

- Foolish tells the Egg it doesn’t work that way. The Egg says it can and it will. Foolish asks if it has any last words.

“I AM A PART OF YOU, FOOLISH. YOU CANNOT GET RID OF ME.”

“No...then I mean this in the most polite way possible...”

“Go to Hell.”

- Foolish submerges himself in the waters of Church Prime as the Egg shouts. When he emerges, it’s gone.

- He wonders if anyone is still alive from the Banquet. He walks down the Prime Path, not understanding why he’s afraid of death.

“There was that brief second before that sword...I don’t see beauty in mortality.”

- He jumps down into the spider spawner and makes his way down the hallway, but he hesitates. He needs to calm down.

- Foolish heads back home. Did the Egg know better than him? Is it saying things that he’s afraid to admit? 

- He makes it back to the temple, wondering if it’s really safe. Even if he can die, why is he so afraid? 

- He opens the secret door and walks down the staircase. He still doesn’t fault the members of the Eggpire for the Egg’s control. He retrieves his things from the basement.

- He just needs to rest. Foolish returns to the beacon light.

---

- Bad creates a three-block-wide area on Foolish’s path to the Nether portal and claims ownership of it. He constructs walls around it and declares it the Town of L’Sandburg. 

- As a gift, Foolish gives Bad a bed and the HBomb catmaid service coupon.

- Bad creates Halobucks. Antfrost arrives to help Bad, and they request more sandstone to build with.

- Foolish gives Antfrost the Sword of XD to kill Bad with. Now, Antfrost and Bad have defenses for L’Sandburg. They refuse to give the sword back.

- Foolish attempts to negotiate with Antfrost to kill Bad in exchange for the supplies. Antfrost is reluctant, as Bad is the ruler of L’Sandburg and he doesn’t with to betray his country.

- Antfrost changes into his maid skin. Foolish asks for his sword back.

- They do an exchange of supplies, but Bad doesn’t give Foolish his sword. Foolish, frustrated that he is unable to break his vow of pacifism, calls in some help: he tells HBomb about the possibility of maid service for Bad.

- Purpled joins the call and logs on. Bad invites him to join L’Sandburg.

- Bad and Ant inform Foolish that he must pay a toll to pass through the path.

- Purpled arrives to join L’Sandburg. He is their lawyer.

- Foolish gets Purpled to kill Bad and then pays him. Purpled also kills Antfrost.

- Foolish says he’ll give Purpled a block of Netherite. Antfrost offers emeralds, but Purpled weighs the options and decides Foolish’s offer is better and continues to kill the L’Sandburgians.

- Bad threatens to declare it an international incident.

- Purpled starts mining bits of L’Sandburg, but Bad stops him, saying he has to take it up with the court. Purpled isn’t one for politics. Bad warns them that if they continue, he’ll have to declare war.

- Bad says they’re bringing HBomb over to act as a judge. Purpled says that’s his cue to leave and heads off. Foolish lets him know that he might need a favor later.

- HBomb arrives in his catmaid outfit and Ant asks him to join L’Sandburg. HBomb becomes a citizen of L’Sandburg. 

- Bad hands Foolish a representation of the court papers (a single arrow) as HBomb exits L’Sandburg to carve out his own country neighboring them. Ant says he can have dual citizenship. 

- H creates a running stream of water and a wall of wood and declares his new country: L’damburg.

- He also creates a seat in the sun and offers Foolish take some time in L’tanburg.

- He then makes a ton of cars and welcomes Foolish to L’jamburg.

HBomb: “Wait, are you streaming?”

Foolish: “Yeah.”

HBomb: “Welcome to L’camburg.”

(Foolish tells chat to never become a pacifist)

- HBomb lights a piece of TNT and explodes L’tanburg, declaring it now L’bamburg. 

- Bad declares that L’Sandburg’s borders, now the entire chunk, have now extended into L’damburg. They now have territory for agriculture.

- Foolish asks, how are they even a country? Do they even have a declaration? One way or another, Foolish says, they can have their little fantasy for a bit but then L’Sandburg is getting destroyed.

- Rat is a canonical L’Sandburg member

- He asks how to make a TNT cannon. Bad warns him against that, saying it would violate their peace treaty.

- Bad declares war on Foolish’s summer home over a piece of cake.

- Bad annexes a block of cactus into L’Sandburg. Foolish is outraged, insisting that this is his land.

Bad: “You will rue the day, Foolish, you started war with L’Sandburg.”

- Bad starts building a wooden one-block-wide pathway to annex territory to the cactus. Foolish gives in and says that they can have this strip of land officially, but not anymore land or else Foolish will have to bring in necessary forces.

- After learning that the cactus has been around for centuries, Bad realizes that L’Sandburg must be older than Foolish’s summer home!

Bad: “Everything the eye can see must be L’Sandburg!”

...

Foolish: “The strength of my patience is the reason you’re alive.”

- HBomb gets injured from falling outside the strip and Bad says Foolish needs to pay for the damages.

- To be good neighbors, Bad offers to let Foolish keep the strip and the cactus, and L’Sandburg and L’Damburg will stay within their chunks. In exchange for the ancient cactus, Bad requests stacks of sandstone.

- HBomb pulls Bad aside, suggesting they form a new nation: L’hamburg. They claim another chunk.

- Bad starts building a statue to Rat. Foolish blurts that he doesn’t want a statue of that “ugly creature” and Bad and H both stop and look at him. HBomb immediately starts building a wall between them.

- Foolish walks into L’Sandburg, checks a chest and is outraged when he finds that the L’Sandburgians/L’damburgians have been stealing supplies from him. 

- Foolish insults how ugly L’hamburg is. Bad leaves. 

- HBomb explains that he is not a citizen of L’Sandburg now, but L’damburg, and that L’bamburg and L’damburg are the same.

- Foolish tells HBomb that he will wait and get rid of L’Sandburg later. HBomb asks if that’s a threat.

Foolish: “That wasn’t a threat, just a promise.”

Foolish: “We strike at dawn.”

- HBomb points out that Foolish hired Purpled to kill them. He’s the judge.

- While H continues to work on L’damburg, Foolish performs the Shift Dance.

- Bad returns. H has to leave, but he tells Bad to keep an eye on the ‘burgs. Bad suggests he and Foolish create a peace treaty. 50% off toll, and in exchange they have peace.

- Foolish asks, what if someone else isn’t peaceful? Bad would consider that an act of war on his part. He offers to gift Foolish L’hamburg.

- The only thing, Bad says, is that Foolish can’t get rid of the L’Sandburg capital. With that, he departs.

- Foolish says he might keep the tower, but he’ll have to do this later.

---

- Puffy examines her Netherite axe. The axe that she killed her best friend with. She still can’t believe what happened. Worse than Foolish dying, she stooped to their level and took a life. She swore she wouldn’t be like them.

- Antfrost was right. She failed. She understands why people didn’t fight for L’manburg now.

“Chaos always wins. Despite all odds, despite everything you think you can do to fix the situation, to help each other, to persevere...you can’t.”

- She doesn’t know where Foolish is, but killing Antfrost didn’t fix anything. 

- There’s somewhere she hasn’t been in a long time. She’s done with Bad, done with Ant -- but at least Ant has a reason to hate her now. By killing Foolish, they’d hurt her more than if they’d killed her.

- Nothing excuses what she did. She’ll face the consequences for killing Antfrost later. She acted on her emotions, but she’d do it again.

“Maybe the only way to have people listen to me, to take me seriously, is to instill fear in them. And that’s not who I want to be, but if it’s who I have to be, if I have to be the villain in everyone’s story? Then that’s the choice I’ll make.”

- The Captain’s Log was meant to document her progress as a knight. Now, this book is her undoing. She goes down into her underground base, looking at the signs on the wall.

“You can’t connect the dots, you can’t see anything coming because everybody you think you know about everyone on this server is a lie! Everything you know, you can’t trust anybody!”

“Even the sweetest of people, the closest of people, the people that you have trusted since day one? They’ll turn, because everybody on this server has a dark side, whether they like to think it or not, whether it’s been shown yet, whether it’s been revealed, everybody -- everybody including me! Including the quote unquote ‘mother,’ the ‘protector of the server,’ even me! Because I could be worse than all of them! And the best part is is that they’ll never see it coming.” 

“Some people are predictable...I’m not one of them.”

- Puffy writes in her Captain’s Log, changing “What it means to be a knight” to “What it means to be a villain...”

DON’T TRUST ANYONE.

NOT EVEN YOURSELF.

A DAY WILL COME WHEN YOU LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND BE THE PERSON YOU RECOGNIZE LEAST IN THIS WORLD.

“Trust...trust is the biggest weakness there is. Trust is what separates strangers from friends. From security, from vulnerability. Trust is weakness, and...on this server, you can’t have any weakness, because if they find out, if anybody finds out you have a weakness, they’ll use it against you.”

- A new era of peace isn’t going to happen. Puffy will bring a new era of darkness. There are few people who haven’t broken their loyalty yet, and she’ll keep an eye out. But to the people that failed her, 

“To those people, I say...’welcome to Doomsday.’“

---

- After discussion about Puffy’s height, Bad tells Puffy that he’s forming a new nation if she would like to join. A nation called L’Sandburg.

- Puffy arrives at L’Sandburg. The capital tower has been renovated, the base reinforced with obsidian.

- Puffy asks if this is canon. Bad says yes, this is his tower. (After Puffy gets mad at him for killing her son, Bad says it’s maybe not that level of canon)

- Bad lets Puffy into the L’Sandburg capital.

- Puffy asks what the point of L’Sandburg is. Bad explains that it’s a sort of tollbooth on Foolish’s road. The toll depends on how much armor a person is wearing. The more shiny, fancy armor, the higher the toll, because that person can afford to pay more.

- Puffy starts twerking to test the road durability. She pays a toll of carrots with one steak. Bad plans to increase toll amounts as the nation improves infrastructure. 

- Bad tries to arrest Puffy and put her into toll jail for bypassing the toll, but he gives up and walks away when she says no. Puffy points out that his security system is not very good, and Bad starts to see the problem here.

- Puffy walks into the toll booth and Bad asks her to pay a toll of five carrots this time. The price has gone up due to inflation. Puffy turns the tables and starts charging Bad toll to enter L’Sandburg, declaring this territory “L’Puffburg.”

- Bad bypasses the toll by saying he’s ready for hot girl summer and agrees to let Puffy keep ownership of the top floor of the capital.

- L’Sandburg is apparently Bad’s “vacation country.”

- Bad and Puffy hang out in L’Sandburg/L’Puffburg some more and Bad plays around sticking his head out of sand and doing various voices.

- Antfrost arrives. 

- Ant changes into Badboyhalo in a maid outfit.

- Bad and Antfrost fight. Antfrost runs out of L’Sandburg and Bad chases after him, threatening to take his second canon life, telling him to accept his death like a good potato.

- Antfrost kills Bad. Puffy tells them to put their weapons away so that they can have a proper duel. They fight a second time.

- Ant and Puffy say goodnight and leave Bad to work in L’Sandburg.

---

Upcoming events remain the same.