Tumgik
#huh. never thought that'd be the thing that makes me rethink all my plans. guess leaving your life companion is a little difficult...
mayonakano-archive · 2 years
Text
hm.
#leoposting#vent in tags#i... have come to realize that i am... very lonely#you'd think that wouldn't be so given how many friends and people i have around me. but honestly... as much as i love my online friends#my real life is quite... desolate.#i don't really have a relationship with my parents (not a good one; at least. i tolerate them at best); all my friends graduated#so we barely see each other. my current school friends are just that - school friends. we don't talk outside of our shared classes.#i have my cat but she's getting old and... i probably have to leave her soon which genuinely makes me want to cry.#i doubt i can take her to uni. especially if i go overseas. i wouldn't do that to her.#huh. never thought that'd be the thing that makes me rethink all my plans. guess leaving your life companion is a little difficult...#it's difficult to imagine her not around. we grew up together. i got her as a kitten when i was 4. i don't wanna think about that anymore..#but. life is lonely. it's not like i have places to be or anything. i barely talk to people. i guess that's my own fault though#i'm basically a shut-in with little interest in the outside world. my optimal life is shut up in some basement somewhere#all i need is a PC and some consoles and some food and i'm content to never be seen again...#it's... whatever. i guess. all i can do is push forward. i don't really expect people to stay in my life long.#i'm just grateful for the time they give me. maybe it's inevitable that people leave me. it's okay.#if i can bring them joy before then; then i'm happy. i hope people look back on me fondly.#i hope they never think of me again.
5 notes · View notes