#i dont think this author would be normal about autistic people. purely going off the book. ofc i dont know him

[schizosupport]

does it still count as a delusion if I think I'm stupid to believe that and that its obviously its not real but I still have like flight/fight/freeze to the thoughts/wrongly percieved event/things in the corner of my eye, or get really scared? Like I don't think that I'm correct in thinking the thing and I don't think it makes sense/has been proven wrong by the person and by testing it lol but also I have a reasoning behind it and still think it? Esp if some of the specific paranoias are very transient (or don't come back) and sometimes triggered by horror content (damn tma t-t) or v stress related ??? I'm trying to figure out if I'm just prodomal probably (bcus I have like a million environmental and genetic risks and Im 16) or actually having delusions now lol ¡¡p but it might be substance induced so :p this stuff has been going on since like, last june maybe and when I started smoking almost everyday since august

(2) HI IM THE PERSON TALKING ABT THE DELUSIONS AND POSSIBLY BEING SUBSTANCE INDUCED !! I think I've also had an increase in negative symptoms in that approximately 1 year time frame than before, even though I'm autistic so experience a lot of the things they list in that stuff :p but that could be because I went through a traumatic relationship or because I've been unmasking over time since I'm not in public and been trying to acknowledge my needs during quarantine :p (3)  hi sorry for using all caps yesterday :(((( I didn't mean to make anybody distressed in any way. Also is thinking as a kid that people may be controlled by larger beings like sims and whenever we die thats because they got bored with us normal weird kid beleifs or ?? Or like after watching truman show I was always thinking abt if I was like it and I still kinda act like there could possibly always be a camera on me or someones watching me but my dad talked about putting cameras around the house and one time when I was getting on my phone because he had taken it away from me a notification popped up on his computer that I was using my phone and if he wanted to look at my screen so maybe its just me being scared cus of that even tho I dont live with him anymore :p and I have no reason to believe he or anyone else actually has access to my phone but they do and its really scary :'((((

Hi anon!

No need to apologize, you’re good, and you didn’t distress me! 

I am very brain-tired there days which makes it hard for me to respond thoroughly, but I’m going to attempt anyways. 

The exact definition of delusions vs magical thinking, paranoid ideation and anxiety can be hard to figure out, and the professionals may have varying opinions as well. The main question, to me, would be - are you very distressed by these thoughts? Are they hindering your ability to live life to its fullest?

If the answer is yes, then I find it less important what they are, and rather I would urge you to look into getting some help managing these symptoms. At the end of the day, knowing the name of what’s going on with you can feel empowering, but it doesn’t actually help much if it isn’t accompanied by an increase in support, understanding and potentially treatment.

Another thing is, you said you’ve been smoking almost every day - from the context I’m guessing you’re talking about weed? 

I know that a lot of people do feel like weed can alleviate some discomfort, and I’m not the authority on drug-use by any means, but I think that a daily intake of any drug, can be a cause for alarm. - No matter if that’s alcohol, weed or “harder” drugs. Especially in people who are susceptible to psychosis (which you seem to be), weed can have a negative effect, and it can definitely increase some symptoms, or even increase the likelihood of a full-blown episode. 

I know it’s easier said than done, and you probably have your reasons for smoking as much as you do, but from a mental health perspective, it does blur the picture. And it can make it harder to get the help you need, because you risk either professional writing off your symptoms as “purely druginduced” or alternatively, they ignore the smoking, and think that you’re more psychotic than you would normally be, which could also lead to the wrong treatment.

(Say for example, you’re smoking to cope with a certain set of symptoms (eg. adhd)- then that smoking causes psychotic symptoms - they treat that with antipsychotics. Now if your original problem was adhd, you would have been better off with a prescription for that, instead of having to take two mind-altering substances as patches on patchwork solutions)

Honestly I’m not the best to ask about the border between delusion and anxiety - professionals have repeatedly told me I’ve long since crossed the border (hence why I’m diagnosed as schizophrenic) but in my own mind I’m still just “a very anxious person”...

I hope this was at least a bit helpful, my computer is lagging and so is my brain, so I’m going to wrap this up here.

Best of luck anon!

Cat