#i know her real name is ella but i think this is fine lmao

[amy-issen]

ok so here it is!! i spent the last week solely making and listening to this playlist like i was POSSESED because this ship is lovely and deserved a nice playlist!  if anyone wants to know why i picked each song, i’m going to ramble about it extensively in the read more, so check that out if you want! hope you enjoy it! also thanks again to @birbwell​ for letting me use her art for the cover!

i divided this playlist in a few sections so let’s start with the first one (section one: first meeting/pining) i. in the rain - joe hisaishi i wanted to start with a short instrumental track to set the mood, and i looooove howl’s moving castle score, so i had to pick this one! the fact that it has rain in the title also helps to reference how their relationship began! ii. with every breath i take - frank sinatra “every breath that I take is a prayer that i’ll make you mine” my sister is a big sinatra/jazz fan (and also a yakuza fan) so she helped me with picking a few of the songs here! this one is very romantic, elegant and beautiful and i thought it fit the mood (and it’s what i think tachibana listens to in his free time lmao).

iii. gold rush - taylor swift “what must it be like to grow up that beautiful? with your hair falling into place like dominoes my mind turns your life into folklore i can't dare to dream about you anymore” this one is my FAVORITE song on this playlist, and one of the first i picked because this song just fits them like a glove. it’s basically pining 101, and i love that what taylor said this song is about “daydreaming about someone then snapping out of it.” i feel like the first part could be from tachibana’s perspective and the second one from kiryu’s (also giving a bit of a glimpse into the future, with the mention of a coastal town they’ll never find together) iv. first love/late spring - mitski “so please, hurry, leave me, i can't breathe please don't say you love me mune ga hachikire-sōde (my heart seems like it’s going to burst)” this one was another song i picked very early on because i love mitski, and i needed to include her here. i just wanted something to symbolize the trust that tachibana and kiryu have to share to work together, and the feelings that emerge from it, if that makes any sense. i don’t think this has a specific perspective, because i feel like this could work from both kiryu’s and tachibana’s (mostly kiryu though) v. real estate - adam melchor “every time I wonder how i'd carry on without you i'm runnin' out of real estate tryna make all the right moves i don't wanna hesitate i would bet the house on you “ do you UNDERSTAND how satisfying it was to find a song named real estate for them?? come ooon. ok that’s not all of my reasoning for it but it’s like. most of it, lmao another song i felt was about trust and feelings. (also a bit of a glimpse into the future, because i’m sad) vi. i get a kick out of you - ella fitzgerald “i get no kick from champagne mere alcohol doesn't thrill me at all so tell me why should it be true that i get a kick out of you?” another one my sister recommended. i originally was gonna go with sinatra’s version of this, but i love this one and it just wouldn’t leave my brain. again, one from mostly tachibana’s perspective, get this man to sing this on karaoke night right now. vii. like real people do - hozier  “i will not ask you where you came from i would not ask and neither would you honey, just put your sweet lips on my lips we could just kiss like real people do” this is one of my all time favorites from hozier and, again, it just fit perfectly. tachibana and kiryu have both lived some very... troubled lives so far, and while they’re depending on this trust they have in eachother, none of them really care to know about what they’ve done or who they are. this is mostly from kiryu’s perspective, specially with this metaphor of being rescued/dug up from the earth with the whole being found in the rain and saved by tachibana and his poor driving skills. viii. delicate - taylor swift “this ain't for the best my reputation's never been worse, so you must like me for me... we can't make any promises now, can we, babe? but you can make me a drink” y’all are going to have to forgive me for picking TWO taylor swift songs but COME OOOON this is another one that i picked early on because i could draw so many parallels between the lyrics and things that they both said in that car scene on chapter 9 (mostly tachibana though) and i kept harassing my sister with screenshots to prove my point and i’m gonna do it again

ANYWAYS i’ve made my case, and now we enter the second section of the playlist at last ( section 2: actual romantic/fluffy songs because this is a ship playlist) i. good old-fashioned lover boy - queen “dining at the ritz we'll meet at nine (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 o'clock) precisely i will pay the bill, you taste the wine driving back in style in my saloon will do quite nicely just take me back to yours that will be fine” is this a bit of a cliché? yes. did i want to include it because it’s very cute and i’d like to imagine kiryu and tachibana having a nice date night with no people trying to kill them all the time? also yes. i love this song.

ii. stay with me/mayonaka no door - miki matsuraba “you in your gray jacket with that oh-so-familiar coffee stain just as you always are the two of us reflect in the window display stay with me knocking on midnight's door i beg you not to go home tonight” (translated lyrics) is anyone not obsessed with this song lately? this is the only song here i’m blaming tiktok for making me listen to it lol. in any way, this song is deceptive because it sounds really happy but is actually quite melancholic. i thought it fit their relationship well, and it seemed like a good addition to the playlist with it’s 80′s city pop vibes.

iii. on melancholy hill - gorillaz (covered by matt forbes) “just looking out on the day of another dream where you can't get what you want, but you can get me so let's set out to sea, love 'cause you are my medicine when you're close to me" this is a gorillaz song but i went with this cover because it fit the feeling of the playlist a little better. another song that i just love very deeply and i thought fit the sentiment of kiryu being like “hey i know we have Big problems and you’re very sad in the moment but i’m here for you” iv. (i love you) for sentimental reasons - nat king cole "i think of you every morning dream of you every night darling, i'm never lonely whenever you are in sight" surprisingly, not one that my sister recommended, but one i found for myself while looking for quiet  romantic songs. i feel like this is tachibana's reply to kiryu being there for him and helping him. plus, idk i just wanted to imagine them slow dancing to this. v. positions - ariana grande (covered by travis atreo) "perfect, perfect you're too good to be true but I get tired of runnin', fuck it now, i’m runnin' with you" i picked this cover because i felt like using ariana's one would be a little goofy for this section lmao, but i really like this song and how it's about commitment and doing everything to make a relationship work. i just wanted to throw some sexy vibes before this playlist delved into depressing stuff. also if you telling me tachibana wouldn't absolute body a tiktok set to this song you're lying to yourself. (section 3: oh no this is getting sad) i. forever - labrinth "i'll live forever" i love everything labrinth makes, the euphoria soundtrack lives in my mind rent free and this is my favorite one. this barely has any lyrics so, again, mostly a track i picked for its intrumentals and feeling overall. mostly preparing you for the sad stuff ahead. ii. hong kong - gorillaz "you swallow me i'm a pill on your tongue here on the nineteenth floor the neon lights make me calm" this is my favorite gorillaz song, by FAR, and i think it's introspective vibe really fits tachibana's character. not really a song about relationship but i really wanted to include it because it's just such a GORGEOUS song. iii. fragments - severon another instrumental track! this one i stole from a playlist my sister made for a fic i wrote last year. again. sad vibes. iv. sign of the times - harry styles (covered by LANY) "remember everything will be alright we can meet again somewhere somewhere far away from here" i loved the synth-y vibe this cover had, while still keeping this song's sad "our lives are dangerous and i'm about to die" vibes. i mostly wanted to evoke the vibe from the scene where tachibana agrees to go with lao gui after kiryu gets shot. just really sad all around. v. so close - jon mclaughlin "we're so close to reaching that famous happy end almost believing this one's not pretend let's go on dreaming though we know we are so close, so close, and still so far" me? picking a song from disney's enchanted??? for a playlist??? it's more likely than you think. idk this song just gives me that vibe of being so close to being happy and together, almost reminiscing and wondering what could have been. but it just... won't happen. vi. as the world caves in - matt maltese "yes, it's you i welcome death with as the world, as the world caves in" oops, yes, i had to go there. just couldn't resist including this song, and i feel like it's really self-explanatory. vii. places we won't walk - bruno major "neon lights shine bold and bright buildings grow to dizzy heights people come alive at night in places we won't walk" again, i feel like this song speaks for itself. a bit of a meditation on kiryu's perspective on things that could have happened, things they would have done, that kiryu will just have to do alone from now on. viii. carry me out - mitski "i drive when it rains at night, when it rains, i drive and the headlight spirits they lead me down the styx so black it shines and carry me out carry me out"

possibly the saddest and the most powerful song in this playlist, because i just had to put a mitski song again. the image of kiryu carrying tachibana's body is just constantly in my mind when i listen to this, but i could also see this song being from the perspective of tachibana's spirit. ix. arms tonite - mother mother "i died in your arms tonight i slipped through into the afterlife it was nice" lmao this felt a bit like a cruel joke to include, but i didn't want this playlist to end TOO depressingly. it's a nod to tachibana dying in kiryu's arms, sure, but also it's romantic and possibly a little hopeful (tachibana lives au!!! orpheus and eurydice au!!! fuck it, idk!!)  xi. everybody wants to rule the world - tears for fears "there's a room where the light won't find you holding hands while the walls come tumbling down when they do, i'll be right behind you so glad we've almost made it so sad they had to fade it everybody wants to rule the world" not a recommendation from my sister, but it is her favorite song, and she was happy that i included it. another 80's bop with sad lyrics! i feel like this is a lovely summary of their story together and it feels like a nice little bow to wrap up the playlist.  i hope you enjoyed my long ass explanations! i might add songs later (or make an entire second playlist altogether for the fic i'm writing rn, but let's not get ahead of ourselves)

[cloveroctobers]

ELLADINE SARABI

IG info/bio: @/ellasardineabi | 18.5k followers | Artist | i was born with glass bones and paper skin♡

25 years old

Born & raised in Cardiff, Wales 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

Father was in the n*vy and moved his family around a few times until he and his wife came to a agreement that it would be best for the family to grow up in one solid place

whereas he would leave for months at a time living elsewhere

Which was hard on the family at times since he is viewed as the rock of the family

He eventually left the n*vy after serving 20 years & was so thankful to, he hated it and how it messed with him mentally

He’s also of Iranian heritage

Her mother is of German heritage

Has her own restaurant that serves authentic German food

Both of her parents instilled hard work, discipline, generosity, and how to be practical in their children

Elladine is the middle child

Has a brother that is ten years older than her and then a younger sister who is seven years behind her

Canon: there is currently a discussion going on if they are going to bring their (maternal) nan/mam-gu home since the nursing home isn’t providing the proper care their nan needs

Her mother has a rocky relationship with her mother that she doesn’t like to discuss with her children but her husband knows all about it

Her nan has Alzheimer's and is becoming violent

it has become difficult seeing her most days

Elladine came into glassblowing after being involved in many classes in secondary such as workshop class

which became her fav since she was able to manipulate many materials such as metal, wood, and glass

She also took a auto body class which was interesting but she wasn’t too thrilled about it. Got away with a B- but knew she could do better if she really wanted to but she didn’t need the class to graduate so allow it

Currently works in a glass studio where her work is displayed/sold and she’s one of the main ones that makes great profit

has bought her own space for her own studio and is slowly making it to her liking with her assistant, yes she’s got one!

Hopes to be in that space within the next 6 months...it would have been a little sooner if we weren’t dealing with a global p*ndemic!!! but ya know life f*cking sucks sometimes!!!1!!:) especially if people don’t gaf

Moved back in with her parents so that she could not only help with her nan but get her studio ready, her parents approved since she was working towards something and realized her talent

I definitely see elladine going through a grunge phase and it probably still slips out every now and then lol

Her childhood room is still in shades of raspberry, gray, and a deep purple

always been plus-sized/fuller than the rest but it’s literally hereditary since her mom is built the same way who got it from her dad

Her family never made her feel ashamed as they shouldn’t and none of her true friends made her feel different since they were all of different sizes!!! besides who’s really friends with someone because of their bodies? Ur really ugly if that’s how u roll js

Always a respectful student and not too afraid to spark up a convo with you but can be a little nervous if the person is more of a “I have to warm up to you first” since she’ll feel like she’s annoying you if she carries the convo at first

Takes her time in relationships because she’s scared of getting hurt, cause breakups are not fun! Especially if theyre your friend on top of that

Although Friendship breakups are much worse let’s be honest here!!!

Has noticed that a few of her exes like to bring up that she’s controlling or too bossy in relationships and that makes her a little insecure since she doesn’t view it that way??

She knows what she wants and likes things a certain way, and she can see how it can kinda come off that way based on how she approaches/says things and tries to be better at toning it down and not being offensive to her significant others

Always has a plan and likes to follow it, she definitely keeps to-do lists on a daily

Takes trips to see Nicky often and vice-versa, every moment they spend together feels like it’s meant to be, even when it’s them just simply chilling in each other’s spaces, he’s truly one of her best friends and he feels like the missing part of her life

He offered for her to move in with him but elladine didn’t accept it since she wanted to be there to help with her nan and in fact—she wanted to be the one to ask HIM to move in with her

but if they make it long enough, they’ll go house hunting together...maybe

I get Shawn/Angela relationship vibes from them (boy meets world for those who aren’t aware of this couple and I’m not just saying this because they’re interracial as well lol) did I say this already about someone else? Brain fart lol

everyone relationship has their flaws so when they hit a bump in the road...elladine immediately wants to fix it but it comes off as more critiquing, moodiness/blaming the other

while Nicky can be defensive/argumentive/a little condescending on his end

To get through it, they normally go on a walk together in complete silence until they’re ready to speak again or they take a break from each other

I think words of affirmation is her love language

Taurus sun + Virgo moon + Capricorn rising?

“The girl on the motorcycle” is one of her fav films — no this is not metaphoric to her love life

Loves watching things with captions on since she always finds herself doing something else while watching anything (which irks Nicky a little bit but that’s just the way elladine is and he loves her so he deals with it)

Will rewind something if she missed it too

Canon: never had morning sex before

but can now say she has ;) & understands the pros people say about it and it outweighs the cons in her book

Will start the whole song over too if she missed her fav part in it

She also enjoys billiards since her brother used to work in a pool hall and when he had to watch her because she was “too young” in her words to stay home by herself he would take her there even tho technically she wasn’t supposed to be there but he was screwing his boss’s daughter so it was quite fine

her sister has a crush on Gary & ships elladine with him, which they joke about every now and then + he doesn’t follow her back, which is okay! Not a big deal but her sister keeps sliding in his dms (he’s now single)

She NEVER thought she would be on THE love island and wasn’t that confident that she’d find a real love that carried on outside of the show but Nicky has proven her wrong 🥲

She’s 5’5–5’6

Probably shops at Zara & top shop and has no issue picking pieces that flatter her “pear” figure, she loves all that is of her body: the pudge, love handles, cellulite and all (she’s very confident and won’t let anyone see her moments of doubt when it comes to her frame)

Loves mythology but will tell bill stfu if he comes near her trying to argue about anything in that subject

Very competitive and will rush through certain things, leaving one to think that she’ll fail somewhere but rarely does

If she’s not near or away from the mountains or the sea for long period of time she gets very moody!!! Guess that’s the Welsh in her huh?

Loves fireplaces, they’re super cozy and very romantic if you catch ella’s drift 😏

Probably smells like jasmine & pink pepper idk

Wants to travel to Iceland one day

Knows her way around a car but dreads having to get it fixed or fixing it herself?

Loves driving until her road rage kicks in? Oh you’re gonna go around her to get in front of her? Never that. She’ll always be in front of you and will break check you if you try her “Drewgi” she mutters

Early riser and goes to bed early too lol

She’s the crying drunk lmao

Automatically vieve has become one of her best friends from the villa but it deff didn’t feel forced like it normally would have just because their bfs have a podcast together, they talk about everything together. EVERYTHING! It feels like she’s the big sister she never had, yet they’re only a year apart lol

They have ft sleepovers and man is it fun!

Forgave lily but at the same time can’t fully see herself being friends with her like vieve tried to encourage before they went on the yacht...sorry everything can’t be Kumbaya over here sis

It sucks to say but it was easier? She doesn’t know if that’s the right term or not... for her to forgive rafi than it was lily and it’s fucked up but that’s the way it is. It’s not like she contacts him on seperate messages or anything like that! She’ll talk to him via group chat and that’s pretty much it. She knows it was all part of the show and production’s bs for ratings but that doesn’t mean it still didn’t hurt

Wishes him success on his shows/movies but doesn’t engage/watch them

What does she post? I feel like she posts maybe three times a month and a lot are outfit pics but tends to go live more so to chat with the people! She’ll also show all what glassblowing entails while chatting away! She loves that part and is pretty open about things but knows how to keep some things private

Personally wasn’t the biggest fan of season 1 but admits she wishes she had mc’s balls in terms of what she would have done if she was in elladine’s place when lily picked Nicky, “ugh! I wish I had her strength rising through my veins in that moment. Absolute riot. Adore her.”

‘“Licky” is a ugly ass ship name anyways so who’s really winning here?!’

Celeb crushes? Iwan Rheon, Henry Zaga, Anthony Welsh, jason derulo, & LaRoyce Hawkins

Listens to: soleima, Marisa Maino, Ava Max, poppy, Caroline polachek, Donny Hathaway, Phil Good, & SAINt JHN

Anthem — M.I.A. “Bad Girls”

[openheart12]

Hi, yes, hello beautiful! Can you write a fic where MC accidentally sends Ethan her entire fanfic folder by mistake 😂🤣

How To Get Away With Fanfiction

I’m reliving my embarrassment 😭 but it is done and idk wtf happened with this lmao. This is also to make up for earlier kmjhygfd

Only tagging @ao719 @oofchoices @loveellamae @burnsoslow because no one else should have to read this unless they click on the read more and if they do... god bless. And thank you to Maroe for helping me come up with some of these ideas!

It had been a long day at work when Dr. Gertrude-Sue Claws made her way home to do the one thing that relaxed her; writing fanfiction.

She had thought of the perfect idea for Spirit and Rainbow Dash and her fingers flew across the keyboard.

There was something about the multi colors in his mane and tail that drew him to her. He lived by the phrase, “hump ‘em and dump ‘em,” which he planned on doing with Rainbow Dash, but not without consent because horse jail wasn’t fun. He had heard the horror stories from his human friends, Kurns and Bryce.

“Rainbow Dash,” he neighed.

“Spirit…” She neighed back in response, she knew all about his...extracurricular activities. He was the biggest fuck horse out of the herd. Ever since Rain had died from drowning, god bless, he hadn’t been the same. It was also why he paid more attention to Rainbow Dash because she had Rain in the first part of her name.

“Let’s do this,” he smirked with his horse mouth.

“Fine…” She turned her back to him as he reared on his hind legs and mounted her, letting out a series of neighs.

She laughed silently to herself before moving on her Owen Hunt fic and she knew how much she was going to enjoy this one especially.

Owen was walking through the halls when he saw five women stalking towards him like cats, one even had whiskers drawn on her face. “Anitah with the h, get him!” He heard one of them command and watched as she came up to him, kicking him in no man's land. He felt them drag him into an empty exam room.

“MAROE! You got the chainsaw?”

“Nah bruh, Bears and Rams were in charge of that,” she explained.

Anything but Krista, cocked her half shaved eyebrow at Burns and Ella. “Y’all got the chainsaw?”

“No, but I have the cream for the burn I’m about to inflict,” Burns snickered to herself at her own joke, the others joining in before getting back to business.

“Burns, Ella, go scope out the cafeteria for some good food because I can’t kill in good faith on an empty stomach and as me and Ella say, we always get food first,” Anything but Krista said, turning her attention to the two people left, throwing them both a knife. Then proceeded to stab Owen numerous times, but making sure not to hit any major organs yet.

“We need a blender,” Anitah with the h announced.

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Anything but Krista and MAROE said at the same time, looking at each other and bursting into laughter at the jinx.

“If that was making a human smoothie, then yes. We’ll show him that no one messes with Derek Christopher Shepherd,” Anitah with the h said smugly, pulling a blender out from behind her back and plugging it into the wall.

“You...you pulled that out of your jacket?” MAROE asked in a surprising tone.

“Y’all don’t keep blenders in yours?” Anitah with the h asked as if that wasn’t common, but it was good to know that she was always prepared.

Suddenly, the walkie talkie came to life, “Team Bears/Rams to Team CA, what y’all want from here? Over and out.”

“Team CA to Team Bears/Rams, we want CookOut. Over and out.” Anything but Krista responded. “It’s about time y’all tried a little piece of heaven,” she looked at Anitah with the h and MAROE.

“That’s a negative ghost rider, the closest CookOut is on the other side of the country. Over and out.”

“Well you better get on your way because you two also need to try a little piece of heaven, we’ll save the good stuff for when you get back. Over and out.” The trio resumed their slice and dice game, taking a short break to play Choices because the latest chapter of The Nanny Affair had just been released and even Owen wasn’t going to keep them away from Sam Dalton.

A couple hours later, Burns and Ella arrived with the food, handing out their respective trays to their respective orderers, they were able to keep the milkshakes from melting by their cold hearts.

“Ahhh gimme my milkshake,” Anything but Krista snatched it from Burns’ hand, earning a slap on her hand from her adoptive mother and a threat of taking away her pony...again.

“Yooo this shake hits different,” Ella exclaimed.

“You could even say that it slaps,” MAROE added making her squeak.

“It’s the one good thing North Carolina has to offer for me,” Anything but Krista chimed in, fist bumping Anitah with the h because the struggle was real. The cows really did outnumber the people, they just hoped that there wouldn’t be a cow revolution because that would be awful except the yeehaw folk would probably survive since they did have a song called “A Country Boy Can Survive.” 

“Burns, we left you the honor of picking the perfect weather for us to dispose of the body which is more like liquid at this point. We need rain, thunder, and lightning to erase all of the evidence. Watching “Forensic Files” has finally come in handy. And Ella, we need you to pretend to be a nurse or something to help us get out of here. I’ll be honest, I haven’t thought that far ahead…” Anything but Krista admitted, but they expected that from her so they already had a plan in place.

“If anyone happens to see Derek Shepherd, I ask that you tell me,” MAROE added.

“Not if I find him first,” Anything but Krista said.

“He’s like fifty four years old…” Burns said being ever the good adoptive mother.

“Then I call Spencer Reid!” Anything but Krista exclaimed.

“I have Lucifer then,” MAROE challenged knowing that would get under her skin. 

“Children, calm yourselves.” Burns shook her head.

“Hey, I’ll be eighteen in like a number amount of months,” Anything but Krista said.

“I’ll be eighteen before you,” MAROE said, sticking out her tongue.

“I’Ll Be EiGhTeEn BeFoRe YoU,” she repeated, placing her hands on her hips and doing that Spongebob meme. After thinking of a better comeback, she grabbed her knife she used on Owen earlier and plunged it into MAROE’s back.

“Et tu, Brute?” MAROE said with shock in her voice before her body crumpled on the ground.

“Yes, bye bitch.”

The other three just stared as the blood drained from her body before turning their attention to Anything but Krista. They were the epitome of 👁👄👁.

“What? She wanted to “due” anyway. And at her funeral we can play “To Be So Lonely” because well she will be lol.”

“Anywaysss, we gonna get food or what?” Ella asked as she covered Owen’s body with a sheet.

“Wings?” Burns suggested and they all agreed. After arriving at the restaurant, they were very shocked to see MAROE sitting at a table waiting for them.

“It’s the trying to kill me for me,” she said upon taking their seats, glaring at Anything But Krista specifically.

“It’s the stealing my fictional husbands for me,” she retaliated.

“It’s the acting like children for me,” Burns' authoritative voice came.

“Sorry,” they both murmured as they looked over the menus to order their food. The rest of their lunch going smoothly, their victims already forgotten about. Don’t mess with hangry chicks who hate Owent Cunt.

“So who’s next?” Anitah with the h asked.

“Ahh you’ve gotten the first taste of blood and now you’re addicted,” Burns observed. She would make for a good profiler for the FBI at Quantico. She would have a cool nickname; Cunt Punter.

“Why not just kill everyone we hate?” Ella questioned.

“That’s a great idea! I say we kill Guy and Vanessa,” Anything but Krista suggested.

“And Landrat!” MAROE added, the whole group agreeing, finishing their lunch before getting to their killing spree.

Gertrude-Sue was laughing at her made up characters and story when she received an email from Ethonk Remy to send him a folder that she had. Goggle Drive was acting stupid so she didn’t realize that she had shared her fanfiction folder with her boss before it was too late. She saw a little giraffe pop up in the right hand corner telling her that he was already viewing what was inside the folder.

“Holy donkey claws,” she cried out loud, smacking her hands against her face.

Meanwhile, Ethonk was going through her folder when he came across a document and his eyes went wide. “What are they doing with the dog?” He said to himself.

Wonder pets, wonder pets

We're on our way

To help a friend and save the day

We're not too big

And we're not too tough

But when we work together, we've got the right stuff

Gooo wonder pets yaaaaay!

The phone

The phone is ringing

The phone

We'll be right there

The phone

The phone is ringing

There's an animal in trouble

There's an animal in trouble

There's an animal in trouble somewhere

“What the hell are Wonder Pets?” He continued inspecting the different documents ranging from murder of one Owen Cunt, horses having sexual intercourse, Wonder Pets stuff, four kids and a dog where they did questionable things with each other, a sponge and a starfish were high on marijuana, a game where Gertrude-Sue had made him and her a family that looked way too realistic for his liking, two bunnies who kept hopping around with one of their little brothers, and multiple documents about Matthew Gray Gubler, Tom Holland, Tom Ellis, Patrick Dempsey, and Harry Styles which were all quite disturbing.

He took out his phone to call her. “Hey uh, Gert, what is this?”

“Oh well you see, the funny thing is that I accidentally sent you the wrong folder so if you could just pretend like this never happened, that would be fantastic. Okay thanks bye. I’m sending you the right one this time.” And she hung up, ready to throw herself off a cliff at her stupidity.

One thing was for sure, she would never make this mistake again.

[miraculouslycool]

Rae Rewatches Miraculous Ladybug

Season 1: Stormy Weather

Now we know why Aurore lost. She had her umbrella open inside a building.

Ooh Cristina Vee was definitely using a lower tone for Marinette in the beginning

Nah don't worry Tikki, I am pretty sure Manon saw you already

"I....just... couldn't say...no."

Marinette chooses her responsibilities over mooning about Adrien a lot in this episode. Good job, especially for a first episode!

Alya the best big sister

Alya isn't wrong, though. Ella and Etta make Manon look like a well behaved kid.

Aurore, honey, close your damn umbrella-

Honestly fuck Alec, that is no way to treat a losing contestant. Whoever hired Alec in the entertainment and people relations industry, I just want to talk.

He was fine until "What's the big deal? She only crushed you by half a million votes!"

*skips Hawkmoth monologue*

She fought the Akuma!

.....why did the elevator turn dark...?

Why is Adrien the only model in Gabriel's company? And why does he have to model that one outfit? Seriously, why isn't Gabriel bankrupt yet?

Emma, Louis, and Hugo Agreste Dupain Cheng

"Wait, no forget the cat" Too bad, Marinette, you'll be adopting two of them anyway.

WHAT IS THE HAMSTER'S NAME?

Come on Adrien turn around and watch your girl do the 'Walking Dead Man!'

Alya gives no shits lmao

Mirelle could have run away twice while Stromy was monologuing

Why does Marinette's face look squished?

See, looking at all the merch for Mirelle makes me wonder if that channel did any promo for Aurore AT ALL

I love Alya just standing there and letting Manon yell at Marinette

Yeah Adrien is definitely not able to hear his two classmates talking about him within earshot

Isn't this a time when akumas are still relatively new?

Yes?

THEN WHY IS THAT CROWD CHILLING OUT THERE INSTEAD OF RUNNING?

Lol I guess they didn't want to use the words 'puppy dog eyes' in a show with a black cat as the main character

More romance? Is this dude aware Adrien is only 14?

Wait what am I saying he's Gabriel's son

Alya having an allergic reaction to the apple lol

"Is that boy your boyfriend?" Manon knows the future

I like that Marinette's immediate concern is about Manon and not whether she is pretty enough to be in a photoshoot. It's rare to see female characters being secure about their looks.

Alya what are you talking about? Marinette is the Prince Charming.

SERIOUSLY PEOPLE YOU NEED TO LEARN TO RUN FASTER

There she goes again, transforming in broad daylight

I just realised that Adrien hasn't spoken for nearly 11 minutes in this episode.

The heroes of Paris need to learn how to hide. Kids, learn how to hide.

Yo yo hits Ladybug's head for once.

Ah, here is the iconic verbal battle between Chat Noir and Stormy Weather which ended in Chat getting his behind yeeted halfway across an entire city

Hand kisses are a gesture of gallantry and chivalry in France, salters doing a lil bit of research of would easily tell them that

KIDS PLEASE RUN

THIS GIRL CALLS OUT HER ATTACKS AND EVERYONE JUST STANDS THERE

She saved him!

He always lands on top lmao

Chat....I said run away from her not run at her....

When I first watched Ladybug grab Chat's tail to catch him, I thought his tail was real it would have been hurting for him lol

They are bumbling around a lot I'm this episode, compared to them today. Which is fine, really, they're still new to the job

Seriously, where is the promo for Aurore??

Okay he petted his tail like her pulling on it actually hurt him. Now I have a valid excuse for thinking his tail was real

There are akumas and then there's Stormy Weather. Ladynoir aren't even able to touch her until the end of the episode

Flying cars from the future!!

Chat getting caught in between two cars kwkekkejrhdj

Aaaaaand there's the bus that's gonna crash them

I'm thoroughly convinced Ladybug's yoyo has a thing for Chat's head.

Her giggle is so cute

Alya is really going to make an amazing mom

Remember when Hawkmoth actually tried to direct his akumas into trying and defeating the heroes?

What happened Hawky? You used to be a decent villain.

"Maybe she's got some unresolved anger issues." "Or she didn't pass her driving test"

Ladybug has no idea how right he is about the swimsuit thing

This entire episode is proof that Ladybug and Chat's banter is fully two sided.

In this episode, they get tricked by Stormy Weather. In Reflekta THEY'RE the ones who pull the TV station feint on her! Growth? Growth.

How did destroying three spotlights cause a power outage in the entire building...?

*skips Hawkmoth monologue*

BRING BACK CHAT'S NIGHT VISION

Frosty the Snowgirl

Cursed potato. Who eats potates raw?

"I think I can manage to-" *nearly gets hit by a fire extinguisher* "-follow your lead on this one" That will never stop being hilarious to me.

HAND HOLDING THEY'RE HOLDING HANDS OMG

Their facial expressions are amazing

"We're about to be obliterated but atleast we'll be dry."

Ooooh the way he pulled her in front of him and pulled his baton out at the same time was so smooth!

I never realised that the animation of Chat destroying the billboard in Kwami Buster was actually reused footage from Stormy Weather.

Ah. I was wrong. Aurore has one billboard. That's totally equal and not biased at all.

Why did Stormy Weather's screams make me laugh?

Is Chat just floating in mid air? How-how did he get up there? How is he staying there?

*skips Hawkmoth monologue*

Marinette still out here trying to be responsible!

"You and Ladybug are best friends!" Sorry Manon looks like you've mistaken Marinette for Lila

DID YOU SEE HOW HAPPY ADRIEN WAS THAT MARINETTE WAS JOINING HIM IN THE PHOTOSHOOT??

AND HOW HIS FACE IMMEDIATELY FELL WHEN HIS PHOTOGRAPHER RUINED IT BY CHOOSING A YOUNG CHILD WITHOUT PARENTAL CONSENT TO MODEL WITH HIM??

Honestly maybe this is just me talking after watching Season 3, but this episode doesn't interest me like it used to. Not because it's a bad episode, it isn't, not at all, just that there's nothing important to take away from this. Stormy Weather is like the Bakerix of Season 1.

[bellysoupset]

I neeeeed more Wolf Dad and puppy, so what if Caleb and Archer go out to do something together, but Arch is feeling under the weather. He thinks nothing of it, and continues the day as normal until he physically can’t ignore it. He ends up puking all over the car/floor/himself/Caleb and wolf dad is like “Awe kid.. why didn’t you say anything..?”. Then he takes Arch home and takes care of of him! I just crave them being soft again, I love them!

@simplysickness said:  Lmao i dont know which one but... i kind of want to see one of them (caleb, archer, ella, you choose. I love them all way too much) catch something and it doesnt seem like it’ll be that bad, maybe something they can sleep off or so, only for it to get worse real fast (like lots of puking n stuff), almost out of nowhere.

This was super fun to write, but I’m splitting it into two, because it got huge! 

Hella Sick Archer - Part 1/4

“Alright, I’ll be leaving shortly” Caleb said, walking inside his house and kicking out his thick boots, his old cell phone squeezed between his shoulder and cheek while he peeled off his soiled gloves. 

Dex looked up from the pile of papers he was grading and raised his brows while his boyfriend ended the call and threw the cellphone on their ratty couch. 

“Going where?”

“Madeline caught a sniff of a runaway, but its off her territory and entered into ours”, Caleb sighed and made his best puppy eyes “Dex, would you-”

“No.” Dexter scoffed, raising the red pen in a warning “I’m not going with you chase a runaway, thank you very much. You see this pile? This is just the eighth grade’s papers and I’m not even halfway through.”

“Fine, fine, no need to be an asshole” Caleb snickered, grabbing the cellphone again. He walked past his boyfriend and messed Dex’ ginger hair, planting a kiss on top of his head. 

“Call Angie for help” Dex suggested, feeling a little guilty for snapping and he was sure that Caleb could sniff it on him, because next thing he was running a hand up Dexter’s spine in a soothing manner. 

“I just texted her and Luce” Caleb said, patting his foot impatiently “You think I should call Quince?”

“He’s at work right now, Kay” Dex answered, relaxing against Caleb’s half hearted back rub. 

The older man huffed and his phone let out a little Ping! “Angie and Luce say they can’t leave the restaurant, it’s pretty crowded.” 

Dexter sighed and turned around in his chair. He really didn’t want to tag along for this adventure, knowing full well Caleb wouldn’t be back until sunset, maybe even in the next day. He was worse than a hound dog when he put his mind into something. 

“Uh- Maybe call the puppy? It’s Saturday, lawyers don’t work during Saturdays.” 

“He’s not ready-”

“He’s a big boy, Caleb” Dexter shrugged “I was younger than him when I was bitten and I learned the rules pretty quickly, he can handle it. Call him.”

The man huffed and groaned, but nodded in agreement and typed Archer’s number, pressing the phone to his ear. 

It rang a bunch of times and Caleb was about to give up when finally it connected. 

“Caleb?” Archer said, his voice muffled by chatter and music. Someone was calling his name in the background, a loud and deep voice. 

“Archer, hi…” Caleb winced at the noise and pulled his phone away “I kinda need your help-” 

“Caleb, hold on a second-” Archer said, before his voice was heard away from the microphone, yelling “I gotta take this!” The background noise changed and vanished suddenly “Hi, sorry about that, you were saying?”

“Are you busy-” Caleb moved away when Dexter pinched his sides painfully, telling him to stand up for himself “I need your help. Pack matters.” 

“No, I’m not busy. It’s a dumb party for Owens, because of yesterday’s game. I’m not needed here.” 

Oh yeah, sports lawyer. 

“Okay, we think there’s a runaway werewolf in our territory, so I need your help to track them down… Can I meet you at the city's entrance?”

“Sure, I’ll be leaving right now” 

“Okay, kid, thank you” Caleb nodded, rolling his eyes at Dexter’s smug smile and hanging up “He’s coming.” 

“I told you so.”                                              ****

Caleb frowned the second Archer jumped out of his car. The man was looking… Off.

He couldn’t quite explain it, but Archer’s complexion was a little weirder, not paler... 

“Are you feeling okay, kid?” 

“Yeah, I’m just tired” Archer opened one of his million watt smiles “I was in court all day yesterday and then the game at night and then this damn party today...” 

“Are you sure you’re up to-”

“I’m fine, don’t worry” Archer interrupted him, already getting in the passenger side of Caleb’s car and closing the door. The older man sighed and circled it, getting in. 

“So...” Arch said as they started leaving the city limits “A runaway? The fuck is that?”

“You were a runaway” Caleb shrugged, looking at Archer from the corner of his eye “Sometimes people get caught in crossfire, bitten by accident, etc... Then they run away before we’re able to identify them and get them into a pack. You were one hell of a runaway.” 

Archer chuckled quietly and looked out of the window “Okay, so... How are we going to find them? Are we gonna howl to the moon or something?” 

“We’re not dogs, Archer.” Caleb scoffed, making a curve “We’re meeting Madeline, she’s got a piece of clothing that belonged to them. You should be able to locate people by scents.” 

“Not dogs, uh?” Arch teased “I can’t do that, I can’t even tell you what’s my girlfriend’s perfume.” 

“It’s Fucking Fabulous by Tom Ford, honestly Archer” Caleb scoffed, patting the leg of his protegé in a friendly manner. Arch shrugged and hugged himself in defensive manner, looking out of the window. 

“I don’t know, she doesn’t use it much and it gives me a headache, okay?” 

“Okay, okay, no need to get defensive” The older man chuckled “I’ll help you identify the runaway’s scent, don’t you worry.” 

“I’m not worried” Archer mumbled sourly, still not looking at him. This was weird, the kid was normally a ray of sunshine, almost too much to be dealt with. 

“Uh... You got any other questions...?”

“Who’s Madeline?” Archer asked, keeping his voice even. He didn’t want to tell his mentor, but the headache that had started during court the day before had returned with vengeance this morning and only made worse by the party. The four glasses of beer he had had, along with a handful of canapes, were sloshing uncomfortably in his stomach. 

He hoped Caleb couldn’t smell that on him. 

“Madeline’s a pack leader” Caleb explained through his teeth and Archer took his eyes from the horizon to look at him. He had his usual laid back demeanor, but the phrase had been said with a little... annoyance. 

“You don’t like her?” Archer frowned, hoping to distract himself of the pressure around his temples and the burbling sensation in his gut. 

“No, Madeline’s fine” Caleb said strongly, convincing a total of zero people. Arch chuckled. 

“Yeah, sounds like you’re in bad terms... Did you guys use to date or something?”

Caleb did a double take, confused and then laughed “Madeline and I?! Christ, Archer, wait until you see her and you’ll change your mind so fucking quickly.” 

What a cryptic line, Archer thought, annoyed. He squinted at Caleb, the headache making him seem a little fuzzy, “The hell does that mean?”

“Give it five minutes and you’ll understand.” Caleb chuckled, speeding up. 

Arch didn’t normally get carsick - It was more of Ella’s thing - but he couldn’t help but feel a little nauseated at the sharp curves the man was doing. He was never as glad as when a gas station came up and Caleb slowed down. 

 “C’mon, let’s meet Madeline.” 

Madeline was a child. Well, an eighteen year old, same thing. She was sitting at one of the station cafe’s booths, playing Candy Crush in a large tablet and wearing electric blue headphones. Her hair was long and braided all the way down to her waist and she was incredibly tiny. 

“Madeline.” Caleb said, sitting down before her “Mads, this is Archer Thomas. Archer, Madeline Dane.” 

“Sup?” She said, her voice clear like silver bells. She sounded like a fucking teenager “I heard a lot about you.” 

“Really?” Arch said, surprised, but only half paying attention. It was lunch time and the cafe was filled with a greasy smell. The churning that had started in the car, hadn’t stopped when he jumped. 

“Yeah, you’re the one who’s dating a witch, right? Heard Kay was scared she’d turn him into a frog.” 

“I was not.” Caleb said strongly, while Archer chuckled. 

“Yeah, werewolves seem to have such a weird dislike of witches. Only one of us is turning into a blood thirsting beast every month and it’s certainly not her.” Archer said, his voice coated with sweetness, but he was feeling suddenly very protective. He didn’t know this girl and she was a pack leader. 

Madeline giggled and agreed “Yeah, totally! I’d love to meet her-”

“Mads, we’re not here for small talk” Caleb cut the conversation short “I need the scent before it vanishes.” 

“Oh yeah, sorry- Here.” She reached in her purse - bright and in the shape of Yoda’s head - and pulled out a piece of sweater “Luther had it in his claws. We thought the runaway might be hurt, but she’s moving too fast for that to be a possibility.”

“She?” Archer said, while Caleb had not a shred of decency and smelt the piece of sweater like an addict, letting his eyes slip closed.

“Yeah, you can smell it in her scent. It’s a girl.” Madeline shrugged. 

Caleb poked his sides and offered it to him and Archer grimaced, feeling a fresh new wave of nausea. There was no way he’d smell a piece of sweater still with dried blood in it. 

“Do I have to?” 

“Yes.” Caleb frowned and he sounded more like a teacher than a friend now “It’s a skill you have to learn. I want you to focus on your wolf and then sniff it.” 

“I don’t know how to do that...” Archer glanced nervously at Madeline, who seemed to be eyeing their exchange curiously. She offered him a smile. 

“I just learned too, dude. Just get a good sniff of it and uh- press your tongue to the roof of your mouth, it helps.” 

Archer’s stomach gurgled and he could feel it ripple through him, the foamy beer starting to turn into gas. He bit down a groan and sighed, taking the piece of fabric and smelling it. 

He felt nothing. Just the smell of unwashed clothes and blood. 

Arch’s mouth flooded with saliva and he swallowed it thickly, forcing down the bitter taste of alcohol that overwhelmed him. Caleb pulled back the piece of fabric and frowned. 

“Arch?” 

He shook his head and pressed his fist to his mouth, gulping down and forcing his stomach to stay put. His mentor was by his side on a second, putting a big warm hand on his back and looking very concerned. 

“Kid, you’ve got a fever...” 

Archer let out a little groan when he managed to force down the vomit, taking a deep breath through his nose “I’m fine-”

“You’re not fine” Madeline said, frowning “Kay, you have a sick pack member, I’m sure we can handle the runaway on our own- Just give me permission to cross over your territory.” 

“Yeah, you have permission” Caleb said, clearly not caring. He wrapped an arm around Archer’s arms and tried to hoist him up “C’mon, Arch-”

I’m going to be sick- Archer tried to say, because just as his friend tried to move him, a waitress walked out from the kitchen holding up a big, greasy hamburger and came straight to their table. He didn’t get to finish that phrase, what came up was a splash of bubbly, foamy puke, that covered his pants and splattered on the linoleum floor. 

“Jesus!” The waitress squealed, jumping back, causing the milkshake on her tray to tip and fall over. It coated Archer’s feet and the sweet, overwhelming smell was too much for him, he leaned forward with a burp, cradling his bloated stomach and puking up a large gush of yellowish vomit.

“Fuck” Caleb whispered behind him, while Madeline seemed downright mortified, frozen in place “Okay, buddy, let’s get you out of here-” 

“Cn’tmove” Archer slurred, falling back seat on the both, spreading his legs as the shrimp canapes joined the mess on the floor. He felt so full and bloated, stomach swirling painfully and pressing against his light washed jeans. 

“Dammit, kiddo-” Caleb groaned, looking away and rubbing his back “Okay, just- Just let it out. You’re good.” 

Next to them, Madeline let out a little groan and covered her mouth, putting her headphones back on and squeezing her eyes. Arch felt awful, not only he was horribly sick out of the blue, but he was causing a huge scene - the entire cafe had stopped - and was making other people sick. 

“Are you done for now?” Caleb asked, sensing his shift of humor. He took his hand from Archer’s back and started searching through his pockets, finally taking out his wallet and putting a handful of bills on top of the table, even though they hadn’t consumed anything.

Arch nodded weakly, knowing he had a couple minutes to spare before the puking fest started back up and stood up shakily. He apologized profusely, but Caleb was having none of it. He put a hand on Arch’s neck, forcing him to move like a stubborn puppy. 

“Not your fault you’re sick, kiddo.” Caleb said, shoving Arch on the passenger seat and buckling the seat belt around him “I’m driving you back home.” 

The younger man nodded in full agreement, pressing his eyes closed and burping wetly “I’m sorry- It just hit me out of nowhere...”

“Cut the crap, boy, you looked off from the second you walked up to me.” Caleb scoffed, roaming through the glove compartment for a bag “Is your girl home? Anyone to watch your ass?”

“Ella’s got-Uuurp-” Archer pinched forward, out of the open door and gagged at the concrete. The seat belt dug in his bloated gut, sending up a string of belches, each one wetter and nastier than the previous, until a painful heave brought up chunky vomit. 

Arch gasped for air, dry heaving twice before he managed to straighten up and wipe the tears off his face “Sorry- Ella’s not home, she’s trying to solve something at the station...” 

“She’s never home, is she?” Caleb bit off without thinking, immediately regretting his words. He sighed “Okay - uhm- I’m taking you to my place then, there’s no way you can look over yourself.” 

“I’m fine-”

Caleb raised his eyebrows when Archer managed to choke on his words and was forced to lean out of the door again to throw up “Say that again, minus the crab legs and I might believe.”

Arch groaned and raised his middle finger shakily “You’re a dick.” 

“I know” Caleb grinned, leaning over his friend to close the door and pressing a paper bag on his hands “Aim for the bag, okay? We should be home in no time.”

[apprenticenerd]

"Anyone can send me an ask with one of the titles and I’ll post a snippet or talk about that WIP!" The Acropolis, Tacet, Checklist, A Tiny Galaxy, Hearsay, Going Back, Ella Disenchanted, Making Peace, The Slashed Circle, Wake Up, Tenno, Midnight, Heliotropism, Arrhythmia, the one about Among Us, the one about Library of Ruina, the one that’s a D&D world concept. Yes, all of them. I know you wanna talk about all of them. So go, go forth and do it!

Hoooo boy, this is gonna be a long post. Lots and lots of writing snippets under the cut to avoid dash stretch!

The Acropolis - original - length uncertain - 1.4k and counting

im not ready for this im not i thought it would be yrs i thought id at least get an english degree first

omg sal whats goin on

fuckin hell whyd it have to be now i have a chem lab tomorrow

sally-tate macpherson. u never swear. ever. wtf is goin on.

ok. jess. i need u to listen really really carefully. understand?

answer the goddamn question ur scarin me

shut up and listen and this will go a lot better

fine but u need to tell me wtf is happnenig

ok. im going to tell you a bunch of stuff. not giving u advice, thats not allowed, but im gonna tell u stuff it seems like itd be impossible for me to know.

?????????????

i said shut up this is really important dont question how i know it. just go with it and figure out what to do. and dont die. bc no matter how crazy stuff seems, if u die, ur dead. here and everywhere. ok?

This is an original story coming straight from a @/writing-prompt-s prompt about a crack in a kid’s hardwood floor that they fantasized was a portal actually being one. I originally intended to write the entire thing like this, as a conversation over text, but that may not be feasible given a certain world-building detail at the other end of the portal (and the limits of my creativity lmao).

---

Tacet - The Blackout Club - one-shot - 3.2k and counting

She closed her eyes again, and there it was. Hallucination? Some new science trick with electromagnetic radiation off the visible spectrum? Evidence that she was actually going insane? Whatever it was, it burned behind her eyelids in bright, incontrovertible red - and was completely invisible when she opened her eyes again. There was just the usual mess of club posters and one big one about someone’s exceedingly dumb-looking lost cat.

Eyes open, there was only Sargent Snuggles. Eyes closed, there was the normal darkness and then three lines of text where the poster had been, wavering like scarlet fire:

JOIN TBC JOIN TBC JOIN TBC

TBC? What the fuck was that? She’d never heard of any group with that acronym before. Hardly aware of the flurry of weird looks from half the other people in the hallway, she crossed the hall to examine the lost cat poster more closely. It felt like perfectly normal paper when she touched it, and there wasn’t even a hint of red with her eyes open, unless you counted the cat’s tacky pink sweater. How the hell was this even possible?

“You’re finally cracking, Bri,” she groaned under her breath, then headed for her locker. She did have to get home. Add another big fat entry to the weird shit list.

A backstory one-shot for my Blackout Club OC Briar, telling the story of how she got into the club in the first place. I’ve been stuck in the same spot for a while now, after Briar’s friend Dani explains the club to her, and I’ve come to the conclusion that the scene’s over as is. Of course, writing the next one is the tough part.

---

Checklist - The Blackout Club - one-shot - 1.7k and counting

8. You still have a headache. Shouldn’t you go back to sleep and try to do this in the morning?

9. (wake up)

10. Nah, you’ve always been a night owl, and school starts criminally early, too early to get much done beforehand. It’s quiet, except for Dad snoring. Your parents are asleep already. You can stay up until this is done, and they’ll be none the wiser.

11. Your head hurts worse. It’s getting harder to think. At only 9 pm? 9:30? Whatever. You should sleep.

12. (wake UP)

13. What are you thinking? You have to read at least a little of this chapter, or there’s no way you’ll be able to bullshit your way through class tomorrow. Besides, all of a sudden, the silence feels...strange. Heavier? You can’t describe it.

14. You need to sleep. You need a drink of water or something. You need to finish this damn homework. You need to sleep. You need to sleep.

15. Stare at The Great Gatsby. It doesn’t make sense. Nothing makes sense.

16. Realize what’s up with the silence. Dad’s not snoring anymore. You aren’t feeling like yourself. You need to sleep.

17. Something’s weird.

18. (WAKE UP) 

19. ...No. Something’s wrong.

Another Blackout Club story and another Interface Screw, as it were, this time in the form of a (very long) checklist. None of the characters have names (yet). It describes another way a kid could find themself running around at night with the Blackout Club, this time by fighting off the Song just enough to run into a club member who could wake them up the rest of the way. As with Tacet, I still need to write the suspenseful part.

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A Tiny Galaxy - Warframe - 4 chapters planned, 1 complete, 1 in progress - 7.8k and counting

Try it if you don’t believe me, the kid in the vent had said.

It was impossible. It was physically impossible. All of this was impossible. Had the Void...? Could the Void...?

The ship was at a standstill. Her mother had tried to kill her, and something had happened. She’d made something happen. There had been no holoprojector in that kid’s hand. Nothing was impossible anymore.

Jhia took a deep breath. How the heck was she supposed to do this? Was she supposed to feel something, some internal guide? Blue Hair hadn’t said. Feeling incredibly stupid, she did a quick mental checkup on herself. Nothing felt wrong, or different - but now that she thought about it…

Afterward, she would try many times to explain it, and fail every time. The best she could come up with was that once she found the Void, calling on it was as easy and as natural as breathing. She opened her hands in front of her, concentrated on that force like an extension of herself, reopened her eyes, and there it was: a riotous little ball of energy, wisps and motes of light and not-quite-light like a tiny galaxy, the Tau system in the palm of her hand, raging.

More OC backstory time! This one’s for my Tenno, a nerdy fourteen-year-old (at the time of this story, anyway) by the name of Jhia, going through the hell that is the Zariman Ten-Zero and what happened on it. This is possibly the first part of the story I actually wrote: the roll-credits moment when Jhia realizes the Void’s changed her more already than she thought.

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Hearsay - Lobotomy Corporation/Library of Ruina - one-shot - 1k and counting

"Oh? Did they investigate further?"

"They tried. Found a few fingerprints, but they didn't match anyone in the database."

"What's the update, then?"

"Reports from elsewhere in the district of someone not in uniform carrying a Zwei sword. They're slippery, good at avoiding us, which would suggest Syndicate operative to me and HQ. Except that in every one of the descriptions we managed to get, our sword thief is a child."

"What? How?!"

"You tell me, Iona. You're the one who went to the crime scene."

"Right... Jeez, if it's a kid, I guess that'd explain why Petrov thought they weren't a threat..."

"My thoughts exactly. HQ has a fair amount of hearsay to go on, but nobody can quite agree on how old the child is, or whether or not she's with a Syndicate. Most agree that she appears to be a girl, tall for a child, auburn hair, clothes and demeanor typical of a Backstreets native."

"We got a name?"

"They've heard Yeri, Kali, Redbird, Suma, Aelfin... No one knows which is her real one, or if it's even any of them at all."

"Damn. ...Say, are you going to drink that entire pot of coffee?"

"Help yourself."

This is one of those stories that turned into an accidental AU when more of canon came out. The idea behind it is that it’s Kali’s backstory told entirely in conversations in which she did not participate, showcasing the fact that a Fixer’s fame is their livelihood and Kali was about as famous as they come, before the whole L Corp thing happened. Of course, the vast majority of the headcanons here got invalidated with a certain Ruina update, so my motivation’s kinda down on this one.

---

Going Back has already been talked about here!

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Ella Disenchanted - The Blackout Club - one-shot (maybe two-shot??) - 1.4k and counting

She woke. Her stomach went through a series of panicked flip-flops as she thought something strange had done it, Dad or a little-kid-nightmares shadow beast had made noise, but no - why had she fallen asleep in the first place? Her butt and shoulder were sore where they’d been leaning on the bottom and side of the windowsill, presumably all night, since the sun was full up over the trees on Old Growth Hill. 

All night. She’d promised herself she wouldn’t fall asleep, but she did anyway. God dammit.

As she unfolded herself from her cramped ball, though, she froze. Under the comforter she’d pulled around her shoulders for warmth, she was wearing her gray jacket, a T-shirt, jeans, sneakers getting dried mud all over the carpet. 

Last she remembered, she’d been in her pajamas.

In which a Blackout Club kid’s little sister wonders where he’s gone when he runs away to the boxcar, and tries to get to the bottom of the mystery herself. Usually she’d be too young for the club to recruit, but her investigations and an incident involving SAO are more than enough extenuating circumstance. Unlike most of my other WIPs, there’s a whole outline at the end of my doc for this one.

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Making Peace - Warframe - multi-chapter - 1.5k and counting

“I…” Iksoh finally said. “Sorna, I hope you realize. I’m not into this. I never - I’m not doing this. Whatever you’re doing, I can’t.”

“I know,” Sorna said softly. The decision tore at her heart again and she almost backed out of the vent, but no. She had to go. She wouldn’t see another innocent crumple in her rifle sights. “I hope you realize. I’m not coming back.”

Behind her, Iksoh let out a long, shaky breath. “It’s taking all I’ve got not to report you right now. Sorna… the Queens’ll have my head for this. Please, please, let it be worth it. Go. Don’t let them take yours.”

“I won’t,” Sorna promised, and meant it.

Later, after her last fight for her freedom was done, on the Steel Meridian ship headed for Kronia Relay, Sorna looked out at the planet retreating behind her and thought of Iksoh. She’d just learned a new word from a Meridian soldier: vaykor tal, the defector’s spirit. Iksoh had let her go, at risk of their own life. They’d had a bit of the vaykor tal themself, even if they hadn’t known it, even if they’d thought it was just some weakness that was bound to get them killed.

“Ranre treri, duf krun,” she whispered into space, a Grineer well-wishing passed down from sergeant to tube-fresh lancer since time immemorial. May your hands be steady, and may life be kind.

This is an AU born of me and some friends wondering why in the heck Perrin and the Meridian hate each other so much in game. It’s about a group of Kavor - Grineer defectors distinguished from other Meridian members by their pacifism - who get to a Relay and start wondering the same thing. Besides Sorna (and, later in the story, Iksoh as well), there would have been Chakh, Beket, and Sydon, plus at least four of the syndicate leaders and a bunch of side-character OCs, all caught up somehow in what turns out to be a surprisingly far-reaching web of intrigue.

--

The Slashed Circle - Warframe - one-shot, probably - 429 and counting

In addition to their written and spoken language, the Grineer have a full language of hand signs. It has its quirks, as all languages do - be careful of confusing it with the Corpus sign language, in which the sign for “to pay” roughly approximates the Grineer sign for...a certain portion of the male anatomy. Among these is the common Grineer sentiment against those who defect from their ranks, baked into the sign just as much as their spoken words. 

The sign of the slashed circle, the sedashkur - a finger drawn in a circle on the chest, followed by a diagonal line - is the highest of taboos to any loyal Grineer. It shows support for such scum as the Kavor and Steel Meridian, enough so that it forms the basis for the Meridian’s battle standard. To sign the sedashkur is to betray your siblings, commit a grave insult to your superiors, paint a near-indelible target on your back. It is an object of hatred and fear throughout the ranks.

She fears it, yes, but she does not hate it, for all her life and into her death as well. It shouldn’t trouble her now, though. It is easy to hide a language, and she burned her journals before she was called to the fortress.

This is a fic about Jhia and her one (1) converted Kuva Lich, namely about the process of said Lich’s defeat and defection, that kinda never got off the ground. Contrary to this snippet, I think most of it would have been written in what are essentially space emails back and forth between Lich and Tenno? I definitely got as far as Jhia sending an audio recording of a bass-boosted dog fart, anyhow.

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Wake Up, Tenno - Warframe - one-shot - 950 and counting

“Wake up, Tenno.”

She wakes. She is - she is Tenno, right? She is a Tenno? Her mind is confused, so full of fog and dead ends - how long was she asleep?

The voice that woke her seems familiar. She might have loved the speaker, in her scrambled past life, the woman in the purple helmet, the one called Lotus in her HUD vision. Her surroundings are a ruin of some sort. Her body is—

...what?

She can move just fine. Her fingers and arms and legs respond with suspicious ease, given how long she must have slept to be this scattered upon waking up, and yet there’s some fundamental disconnect. This is her Warframe, her body, but it’s not her body somehow.

...wait, where did the term “Warframe” come from?

A Tenno, unnamed but intended to be Jhia on my end, wakes up on Earth at the very beginning of the in-game storyline. Since the tutorial has gotten an overhaul in recent months, I may have to modify even what little I have on this a lot.

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Midnight - Iconoclasts - poem - 280 and counting

been anything smaller than been anything

never been anything smaller than

“good morning, how’s miss grump doing today? i heard about that last mission...if you didn’t sleep well i can call you in sick, it’s alright-” “oh, shut up, grey”

there has never been anything

“oh, shut up, grey” “love you too”

smaller

“love you too”

than

me

A very fragmented, stream-of-consciousness-y poem meant to represent Agent Black’s failing sanity near the end of the game. The words of her famous one-liner (“there has never been anything smaller than me”) are interspersed, out of order until the end, with poetic descriptions of other characters and bits and pieces of a flashback involving Agent Grey.

---

Heliotropism - Iconoclasts - one-shot - 1.1k and counting

Lily, though she’s superstitious, will have none of these self-important truths, none of these semblances of certainty when really all it is is wishing on Ivory and hoping for the best. She calls for Miss Andress instead. 

A stout but severe woman with ten grandchildren and a great-grandchild on the way, Miss Andress is perhaps the quintessential matriarch: nurturing, selfless, brutally honest. She is the one the people of 17 trust when they feel they can trust no one else. Lily needs the kind of reassurance only she can give, with the authority of ninety-one years and the wisdom of two sons, one daughter, and some five dogs raised under her care.

When Miss Andress visits House 4, she asks Polro and Lily to each bring an object they cherish the most. For Polro it’s his largest wrench, pitted with use but still polished to a brassy shine; Lily surprises everyone by pulling out a tiny, unloaded stun-gun, and surprises them more by not explaining it at all. Miss Andress doesn’t question it. She just turns the two tools over and over in her hands, head bowed, squinting at them as if trying to read the secrets of the universe in the scratches carved into them by time.

Finally she straightens up and sighs, pushing a strand of silver hair behind her ear. Her forehead is slick with sweat, though the night is cool outside. “I don’t know what she’ll do,” the wise woman says, heavily, as if delivering bad news. “I just know she’ll change the world.”

Can you tell I like backstory fic? This one is for Robin, with one short anecdote for each year of her life, up to age 17 and the events of the game. It’s also an excuse to world-build a bunch, lol.

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Arrhythmia - Crypt of the NecroDancer - one-shot(?) - 4k and counting

The creature didn’t say anything, just beckoned to the shadows. Before I could move, two other creatures came for me, sending the other humans - former humans? - scrambling away in panic. One landed a hard blow on the back of my head that sent me to my hands and knees, seeing sparks; the other said “Freeze!” and I could only watch as ice sprouted from the leaf litter, cementing me to the ground.

The one who’d hit me produced a dagger from the inside of its cloak. I tried to pull myself up, to do anything at all to keep myself from getting shanked, but it was no good. There must have been a secondary effect on that spell; my limbs wouldn’t respond. I felt the dagger tear cloth in the region of my back, and prepared for the pain.

It didn’t come. The creature cut a slit in the back of my tunic, then another. Neither one touched the skin at all. I can’t really describe what happened next - my brain was having trouble computing how my arms were in front of me, visible, unable to move, but it felt like the creature was pulling them through the gashes in my tunic, but that was wrong, they didn’t feel like arms at all.

“Holy fuck,” I heard someone say.

The ice holding me down melted into nothing as the spell wore off. I jumped back up, head spinning a little, ready for another fight, only to spot two flicks of scarlet in my peripheral vision. I spun around, but they moved with me.

I think I already knew what they were. I just couldn’t admit it to myself.

You’ve already seen this one, Nick, though I’m pretty sure it was well over two years ago. It’s a pile of old headcanons, some of them now outdated I’m pretty sure, about how Nocturna ended up a vampire in the first place and a little bit about how vampire society works. According to Google Docs, I’ve been stuck on this one since March 2018. Whoops.

---

untitled (working title “adult citra meets an impostor bc what is self-control”) - Among Us - one-shot - 572 and counting

“I know. You’re stuck, aren’t you?” Having well and truly gotten their full attention, Citra continues, “God, I can barely imagine. Having to take a weird-ass host whose biology might even be toxic to you, I don’t know. Needing to get to a whole other galaxy, feeling like the only way to do that is by deception and death.” “How…?”

She sighs. “I told you, this isn’t my first rodeo. One of your kind saved my life when I was a kid. Since he’d killed Mom and Dad had been out of the picture long before, he stayed here and helped raise me afterward. It’s how I learned to pronounce...a few of your words, at least.”

“You missed the ‘H’ sound.”

“Isn’t that the one that’s literally impossible to do right with Terran anatomy?”

“Maybe. You think I know Terran anatomy all that well?”

Citra chuckles. “Fair point. You let us find your buddy and fix the ship, I’ll raise Xai when we get comms back and he can try and help you get home. Deal?”

I found an Among Us comic on Tumblr, absolutely ran into left field with it to make a couple of OCs, and then made AUs of those OCs because of course I did. This one is from a future scenario in which Citra (typically orange) meets someone rather familiar on a mission with the crew of the Skeld.

---

untitled (working title “library of ruina but they adopt half the guests”) - Library of Ruina - length uncertain - 1k and counting

“And what happened to not caring about others because it’s a waste of time and heartache?”

Now it’s Roland’s turn to sigh. “I don’t care about him. I just don’t want the guilt of killing - look at him, he can’t be older than eighteen or nineteen!”

Raised eyebrow. “Finn will be twenty years old in fifteen days’ time. He is a legal adult. I fail to see why this should matter to either of us.”

“He’s fresh off his first Fixer license! I have years of experience! He had no idea what he was getting into when he signed that invitation and you know it!”

Angela fixes him with a glare that turns his stomach, his freshly remade body reacting to the memory of its sudden, and extremely painful, dismemberment. “I could quite literally hold your soul in my hands if I wanted,” she reminds him in an undertone of steel. “I must do the same for him, following the invitation’s guidance, or my entire plan will be lost, my coworkers’ sacrifices all for naught. Do not disappoint me or ask any more impertinent questions. You know what to do, and what will happen if you do not.” 

Look, some of the people you fight in this game deserved so much better, okay? I came up with an AU concept where if a guest willingly concedes the fight and agrees to stick around, you can get their book without killing them. Finn doesn’t die; neither do Tomerry or Shi Association; all the former employees realize exactly what’s going on with Philip after the Wedge Office fight and manage to calm him down, avoiding the whole Crying Children situation. (And then Gebura makes him collect his jaw off the floor by revealing herself as the Red Mist.)

---

The one that’s a D&D world concept doesn’t have anything concrete written for it yet. (Don’t read this bit if you might want to play in my campaign at some point!) Instead of your typical Forgotten Realms planar setup, the world at large would be called the Seven Spheres, each of them different in terms of climate, geography, native species and magic, etc. The First Sphere would be the most “generic” one (to our way of thinking) and the main setting of the campaign; it would also be the smallest of the Seven, its primary continent home to a former empire of dragons that spanned most of the Sphere until its mysterious fall a thousand years ago.

Now, since the empire fell, the dragons and their children have slowly been dying out. Best estimates are that there’s only a thousand or two left in the entire First Sphere, with fewer eggs hatched every decade. The player characters enter a world with pretty typical low-level quests to start with, but every so often, especially if they engage with optional story stuff (this would be a more roleplay-focused than combat-focused campaign), they get wind of changes in the air - a failed harvest here, an unusually hot and stormy summer there, a trade war once they start hitting mid-levels.

It mimics real-world climate change in all but cause. As coastal cities struggle to contend with rising seas and, more alarmingly, wizards all over the Sphere start to notice their magic falter and wane, the PCs’ goal becomes getting to the bottom of this. And what’s at the bottom is...your typical Nerd fusion of science with fantasy settings.

The Seven Spheres are not planes of existence in the normal D&D sense, but seven planets in the same solar system, each with its own ancient god far more powerful than any god in any mortal pantheon; the First Sphere is so named because it’s closest to the sun. These planetary gods are incredibly large and incredibly alien, thinking in geologic time and concepts far too broad and slow for most sapient beings to comprehend. A thousand years ago, the fall of the dragon empire was caused by an ill-advised ritual meddling with the god of the First Sphere’s natural process of rebirth, causing said god to die without a replacement.

It’s taken this long for the First Sphere to feel the effects because, again, geologic time - a thousand years is a blink of an eye in this kind of time scale. But now the ancient earth-magic that had kept the Sphere’s climate temperate and its magicians in business is failing. The dragons, as beings of magic intrinsically, have been failing all along. And now it’s up to the PCs, up at level 17-20 if not higher by that point, to figure out how to fix the situation and find a new planetary god for the First Sphere before the whole Sphere burns to death.

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: [Okay, so coach ride to the school trip moment, JJ sat together 'cos who else are you gonna sit next to tbh, all the flat whites are here and we're making Grace feel like crap in all the ways, starting with having a loud, extra phone call with Pablo rn and making Grace hear and look at all this on facetime, but literally the whole bus is bearing witness, have you no shame Mia] Jimmy: [I like to think Ella and Asia are sitting together and Ella wants to die cos Asia's so dumb and Hollie's just on her phone watching tiktoks or whatever living her best life] Janis: [a mood but not at all, lmao] Janis: [okay, so my vague idea of something JJ can do to take attention away from Mia, piss her off, but without everyone else being as anti-them as they are anti-her rn, is for Janis to text Grace like come here for a sec, but that confuses Grace (obvs) so then Janis gets up and is like I NEED TO TALK TO YOU so she gets Grace out of this hell but also Mia will be PISSED she has, let's say there's a free seat in front of JJ or whatever where they can sit and then have a whisper sesh where we pretend we're talking about Jimmy but in actuality, we're not saying much beyond, you're welcome and, go along with it] Janis: [then once this has happened, all the flat whites will be 👀 WHAT DID SHE SAY etc, and THEN JJ can be couply cute like snuggling etc now they know they're looking] Jimmy: [I stan your mind boo] Janis: [so, Mia has been pissing us all off for time but it's when she's like, forcibly trying to get Grace to talk to Pablo, Janis visibly stiffens and is like, nah] Janis: If you do me a favour right now, I'll do you two Jimmy: Alright Janis: [inact this Grace moment for a plausible amount of time for a girly chat you simply NEED to have RIGHT NOW so sorry Mia, that's probably 10-15 minutes at least you two have to sit together and talk so, if you wanna, you can be Grace for a sec and we can '-' or we can just say roughly what they'd find to talk about lol it might be amusing potentially] Jimmy changed name to Grace Janis: [after the text, coming over with such a clearly but purposely fake apologetic face like oop sorry to barge in on this phone conversation you're having so publicly 'Grace, can I borrow you for a sec?' with a kind of serious but also excited tone, like, the just-NEED-to-talk-about-this-NOW vibe] Grace: [Grace just like 'oh yeah, sure, babes' in a tone that's lowkey like anything for you anytime because 1. it'll annoy Mia 2. she literally would die for Janis and we know it, making her body language and face as excited but serious like she respects this TRUST, fuck you Mia, before throwing an apologetic look at Mia as they go so she knows it's a deliberate afterthought] Janis: [smiling at Jimmy as you sit back down, opposite/in front of him, which she doesn't smile a lot at school/ever obvs so that itself would be so strange, everything from this point essentially in a whisper/no more than a murmur so no one else can hear, which is fine 'cos object of your affection is RIGHT THERE so everyone understands the vibe without needing to hear anything 'she's a cunt' gritted teeth 'cos we're fuming about this phonecall shenanigan but then switching to a #conspiratorial 😏 look, peeping at him between the seats as if to really drive that home 'i'm gonna shit in her bed' with a grin] Grace: [so effortlessly following this that would be concerning except that we know she's living a fake life every day so it's just standard to her by this point which hurts my heart but okay Gracie 'so is he' because she's having some emotions herself about the Pablo and dad situation but we can't let them show 'totally a match made in hell' holds her face/fans it like whatever Janis is saying is making her blush and giving her like an OMG look before likewise peeping at poor Jimothy but deliberately less subtly because everyone expects her to be that bitch/the friend who turns around when you tell 'em not to 'IOU if you need a lookout or whatever, but I'd hate to tread on barista boy's toes so' looks at him again and smiles herself] Janis: [nodding, really to agree with that sentiment, but making it look as if she's admitting to something like okay, you got me and hiding her own face in her hands like we're so 🤭 'hope he knocks up Asia' when you've said it just to be a bitch and because you're angry but the obvious parallel to what Caleb and Drew actually did to Ali and Carly does not escape you so you shake your head now and then lean in further, saying 'WELL-' at a louder, potentially overhearable volume, as if you're about to spill the ACTUAL tea 'nah, don't worry about it, long as she gets hers'] Grace: [when you sigh because you're so sad and over everything tbh and the reminder of both deadbeat dads doesn't help but you turn it into an excited gasp before it's even out of your mouth properly because that's something you're used to with all these shit lads, likewise the fake facial expressions are so on point as you pretend you're getting that tea and say something loud like OMG because you're obvs so excited you can't help it and do a fake look around like oh I hope nobody heard that 'he's already given her an STI, but you obviously didn't hear that from me' spills actually tea because we're sad and mad rn like] Janis: [giving her a half-genuine smile/look of appreciation that gets overtaken by an OTT 😍 one about your current situation before you'd barely have chance to clock it, giving her the expected playful-slap-on-the-arm like what are you like? at least you can use the actual snort at this news to pretend you're so amused about anything but Mia getting the clap 'very romantic' letting your voice raise again on any word that would help sell your story, actually covertly looking over to the flat whites 'she's hung up now, of course' 'cos what's the point if you can't torture Grace] Grace: [when you're doing a whole apology moment loud enough to be heard by Mia cos will annoy her because you never apologise to her sincerely but also as your chance to actually be like I'm so sorry that our lives are like this and we don't talk anymore because all this comes out when you're drunk but before jj fake date when are you two ever at the same parties, you just aren't and you're having enough emotions to accidentally go there 'he's literally such a dark horse, I can't even' looking at Jimmy and again loud enough to be heard even though you're shading Pablo and Mia because duh, doesn't look over at the gals cos she doesn't need to, we know the drill by now 'duh' but her voice is like a dead version of her real one and thus in such a whisper because the most genuine thing she's said lowkey in forever 'he doesn't care how her day's going and what can she say anyway' cos we all know he only wants to hook up and her life is boring and basic] Janis: [when you can shh her because not that deep and we're so close and sisterly rn but it really 'cos this makes you so uncomfortable like stop 'I know' when you have to force the enthusiasm into your voice on that one 'cos we all know Pablo is an unavoidable dickhead even before this and you're grieving too rn boy but still, Mia, of all people, ew, 'I can't believe it' when your overall demeanor and tone projects that you feel so #blessed but the reality of the words is literally the opposite 'daddy issues, right' clutching your hand to your chest like you're talking about something SO cute he did but the 'awh, bless' is all for that tragic hoe] Grace: ['same' and likewise your tone is the opposite as it also is when you nod in agreement to the daddy issues comment cos that hits close to home obvs 'this trip is gonna be so' loud enough that people can hear that too even though you also mean that in a please kill me way not a I really ship JJ way] Janis: ['Yeah...' and a sigh that is SO wistful and not at all exasperated at all the shit Mia can and will try to pull, going back to the #conspiratorial 😏 look 'I've got plans' and winking 'cos have, getting up like better get back to it 🤭 and giving her a one-armed hug as you stand to go, purely as a fuck you ladies, turning back like oh! just remembered and handing her your phone 'downloaded that album you wanted to listen to' at normal volume, so she has an excuse to stay put and put headphones on] Grace: [making your own song and dance of forgetting something too purely because you're dying over the hug like I'm so dumb I'd forget my weave if it wasn't glued in and passing her something between the seats once she's sat back down with Jimboy, honestly fuck knows what it even is but it'd drive everyone crazy trying to guess] Grace changed name to Jimmy Janis: [gonna lowkey need that phone back but it can easily be passed back via the seats so that's no issue, just not looking at him yet 'cos can't 'cos that was so OTT for you (obvs) but you can have a bit of 😳 before you commit to this part of it] Jimmy: [playfully nudges her and passes her his phone (oh the trust ladies) and takes a headphone leaving her one cos as far as everyone knows Grace has hers and he knows everyone is looking at them and what is going on and that's his way of telling her he's keeping up with it] Janis: [when you a mvp, nudging him back and it means far too much to be decipherable like sorry, thanks and more all in one gesture, leaning in figuratively and literally for this headphone moment, which makes resting your head on his shoulder that much easier] Jimmy: [we know he's softly playing with her hair for the first time ever because we can pretend he's playing along but really he's wanted to do that since day 1 baby] Janis: [when you do put some music on so you can have some vague distraction but you put it on pretty quiet, so you could still whisper to each other 'alright?' like, asking if he is, if that was, if this is, again, too many potential ways to mean that] Jimmy: [when you just say yeah at a normal volume because use that to your advantage] Janis: ['yeah?' back in what can only be described as low-key saucy, like oh really vibes but like, oh really lol] Jimmy: [gives her the first LOOK ever and nods because we can both play this game gal] Janis: [when the fact that that shook you works to your advantage so you don't have to worry, turning this into more of a snug than it was, putting your arms around his waist and loudly whispering 'I'll make it up to you' 'cos gonna pay off that debt but take that as you will people] Jimmy: [when you can just be 😏 cos it works but you're wondering how she reckons she'll do that and you know she knows that] Janis: [okay, using his phone to type back and forth 'cos that'll look cute and keep up the lie] Janis: how does she look Janis: scale 🥺 😢 😭 😤 😠 😡 🤬 🤯 Jimmy: 😡😡😡 Janis: not bad Jimmy: but will it do? Janis: got three days to 🤯 Jimmy: if you need 'em Janis: that a challenge? Jimmy: does it sound like one? Janis: 👌 Jimmy: [takes her hand to write ok on it because it looks like they're holding hands so challenge accepted vibes] Janis: 🦐 is 😢 Jimmy: duh he's got resting 🦐 face Janis: [loling 'cos hohoho so funny babe but part of that was genuine] Jimmy: [when you gotta give OTT 😍 cos she's got a cute laugh] Janis: do I need to put 🤢 on the scale Janis: or is that purely 💀#1 💀#2 Jimmy: they would reckon that's #ultimategoals Jimmy: a lad who triggers their gag reflex Janis: 🤮💘 Janis: GROSS Jimmy: [little lol] Janis: [😍 for the fans] Jimmy: [don't think about how bad you wanna kiss her boy, you can't risk being the new Mia of this coach] Janis: [you gonna have to chill but it won't be that much of a journey wherever you're going so don't worry lads, in fact, close your eyes and pretend you gonna have a lil nap on him] Jimmy: [just doodling on her with your fingertip really softly I like to imagine he's drawing out the scale] Janis: [love that, we must skip though] Jimmy: [so okay, activity time, we having Grace on JJ's team cos suck a dick Mia and a boy she can flirt with, then some random] Janis: [it should be a girl Mia has beef with, for some ridiculous reason, like bitch has deffo not done anything lol] Jimmy: [yasssssss I love that] Janis: [yo y'all better win or at least beat her team] Jimmy: [wouldn't be hard to beat her or loads of the others even if they don't win but ngl I'd love it if you did] Janis: [do it we're writing it fight us they're competitive and they're dying 💀#1 💀#2 so bye] Jimmy: [fuck it nobody would be expecting any of yall to win or care so I'm about it] Janis: [hohaha start as you mean to go on tbh] Jimmy: where on the scale now? Janis: 🤬 Janis: definitely heard her name followed by bitch Janis: my review even less favourable Jimmy: [picks her up and spins her round like he's so buzzing they won] Jimmy: that'll help Janis: don't put your back out Jimmy: I ain't as old as I look Janis: [😏] Janis: that's what they all say Jimmy: you been to catholic school, girl? Jimmy: I get why they all wanna crack onto you now Janis: rude you didn't get it before Jimmy: wouldn't wanna make your head any bigger Jimmy: touch and go picking you up as it were Janis: not my fault you're short and I ain't 💀 Jimmy: piss off am I Janis: no need to 🤬 Janis: we 🏆🥇 Jimmy: What you trying to make me 😭 for then? Janis: awh, babes Jimmy: leave it out Janis: 🤐 Jimmy: 👍 Janis: hmu when you wanna make a cracking bridge again then Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Jimmy: 😎🔥 Janis: I get it, IOU rn Janis: 💭 on Jimmy: I have had the one Janis: yeah? Jimmy: this is working, yeah? Jimmy: shes at 🤬 you said Janis: it's making this trip worthwhile, yeah Jimmy: nowt to do but crack on with making it more worthwhile Jimmy: neither of us can move for 'better' offers, can we? Janis: Literally gonna rip out my own 👀 or everyone else's if they don't calm it down with the sexts Janis: so, you wanna 🤯? Jimmy: want is a bit strong Jimmy: but if we're pissing about performing for her, might as well clear our DMs of dickheads while we're at it Janis: yeah, it makes sense Janis: may as well use it to our advantage any way we can Jimmy: while we're stuck here doing this bollocks at least Janis: kills time, keeps us from killing anyone Janis: I'm down Jimmy: Alright Janis: how are we gonna do this then Janis: like, exactly Jimmy: How do you wanna do it? Janis: We'll have to go some for people to calm down, obviously Janis: people have no problem being hoes Jimmy: I know Janis: so like, full 😍 then Janis: ? Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Jimmy: won't be that hard, people have no problem believing we're #fated either if all those likes are owt to go by Janis: they're idiots and I'm well convincing Jimmy: yeah alright, Julie, I'll collect your oscar for you on my way out 'cause it won't be for long either Jimmy: I'll piss off soon and no dickhead's expecting us to keep going at being that starcrossed Janis: 'course not Janis: they'll forget about you in a week or two Janis: makes sense for this trip, as you said Janis: everyone's tryna get off with each other and it gets both of us an easy out Jimmy: mine or yours tonight then, my dear? Janis: I'll come to yours Janis: then Grace can have then over and they can 👀 I ain't in Jimmy: you're on to a real winner today, girl Jimmy: not just a big head Janis: that's the spirit Jimmy: 👻 Janis: specifically no 👻ing Jimmy: What about 🥃? Janis: DUH Janis: you got some? Jimmy: not very #goals to have to bribe you but Jimmy: wouldn't come here empty handed Janis: obviously I've only got eyes for you, Casper Janis: oh, who are you rooming with? Jimmy: Dunno, man bun, deepest of v neck t-shirts? Jimmy: only got eyes for his vape Janis: oh Janis: yep, I know who you mean Janis: 🎨 description Jimmy: ain't saying I could be an undercover 👮 or one of their informants but if Mia's dad goes down I will take the 🏆 Janis: 🐀boy can be your new name Jimmy: tah, sweetheart 💕 Janis: yeah, well couple goals that Jimmy: that'll be why I propositioned you Janis: is propositioned a sexy word? Janis: it sounds a bit 👮 report Jimmy: Busted, I'm 45 and faking being a real #lad an' all, the 😎 hide my crows feet Jimmy: can't have any secrets between us, like Janis: gotcha Janis: makes sense why Mia is 🤤 Jimmy: and sir Janis: you wish Janis: devvo he ain't here Jimmy: alright, put down the 🧂 babe, you'll give me a heart attack Janis: 🙄 Janis: yeah secretly so jealous of our fat, balding 🤓 of a teacher Jimmy: DUH Janis: 💁 Jimmy: while we're chucking tea about, I weren't on that teen soap, so warn us if you're gonna show up to my door naked Janis: not my plan Janis: reckon we can scandalize without going there Janis: soap and romcom tropes would be our friend though so let us down there Jimmy: soz, I were #blessed with the accent and the IQ for that bollocks but none of the emotional range Janis: leave off Janis: your 😍 were solid Jimmy: save the compliments til my room's full of dickheads to overhear Janis: just don't mention the part where I fake it like a pro Janis: not an idiot Jimmy: easy to say you take it like a pro instead Jimmy: nowt to worry about Janis: lovely Janis: are we fucking or are we 💘 Janis: important distinction Jimmy: reckon we can have it all, Juliet Janis: alright Jimmy: I know it ain't just for 💀👑 now but nowt'll piss her off more Janis: right, she's incapable of any of the finer human emotions Janis: oh, her boyfriend gave her an STI Jimmy: lovely, that Jimmy: which one? Janis: which boyfriend or which STI, yeah Janis: the one I'm related to, by all accounts Janis: 🤞 chlamydia so I don't need to cuntpunt her Jimmy: sounds a bit like the name of a kid fiddling island her dad does his business lunches on Jimmy: works on loads of levels Janis: 😏 Janis: he will be SO proud Janis: though, probably casually racist which is what makes him the ideal candidate for a boyfriend Jimmy: 🤞 his secretary ain't related to me if her dad's caught it off her Jimmy: turned down that teen soap for a reason Janis: 😱 Janis: goes all the way to the top Jimmy: 🏆🥇 Janis: was slightly concerned you were saying you fuck your cousins or something but as I only need to fake touch you Janis: you do you Jimmy: I ain't got any cousins, soz if that's pissed on your ultimate kink Janis: I'm not fucking 'em, new boy Jimmy: 👌 Janis: you don't vape, do you Jimmy: what kind of fucking question is that? Janis: a valid one 😎boy Janis: 'cos that shit gives me a headache Janis: not gonna sit in your cotton candy cloud Jimmy: you've had a 🚬 with me, dickhead Jimmy: did that taste 🍧🍦🧁🍰🎂🍭🍬 🍫 to you? Janis: might mix your vices Janis: but nah, you're old school 😎 good Jimmy: I can 💀💀💀 buzzing, grinning in my ⚰ over knowing you reckon I'm 👍 Janis: obviously Janis: 🍀 you Jimmy: 🥃 give you a headache an' all, you want a 🍹 instead, Jane? Janis: piss off Janis: 1. offering shit you can't provide unless you've brought mixer and ice with you too 2. being a dickhead Jimmy: 1. someone'll have brought a 🧃 it's a school trip 2. you're being a dickhead Janis: 1. you a barman and all? 2. save it for your roommates, lover boy Jimmy: 1. find out in a bit, won't you 2. I don't have a vape pen, remember, fucked the foreplay right up Janis: your idea of foreplay is worrying Janis: fake or otherwise Jimmy: bit late to spread that about, we're committed to being #goals not what were it Mia said, weird freaks or some bollocks Janis: can tell she's not an artist Janis: words not her strong suit Jimmy: what is? Janis: ♙ Jimmy: if that ain't nerd flirting, I dunno what would be Janis: seeing she can control mindless idiots ain't 😍 Janis: if I wanted to be surrounded by those kind of people, I could do it easier Jimmy: the game though, all that eye contact and pissing about Janis: find us a board and we'll give 'em foreplay then Jimmy: [draws her a pisstakey flirty board] Janis: 😂 Janis: lemme practice not blinking Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: my line Jimmy: Alright, go on Janis: I already said it Jimmy: you wanted the practice Jimmy: have another crack at it Janis: I'll say it when they can hear Jimmy: 🤞 you'll say a bit more than that Jimmy: they're idiots, you already said an' all Janis: idiots need visuals, I'm aware Jimmy: you've got something going on behind them unblinking 👀 I'm aware Janis: 💘 Jimmy: 😘 Janis: [skipperoni to showing up in your PJs, a bold move] Jimmy: [when it's a lewk and his jaw hitting the floor isn't fake at all] Janis: [we just pretending we don't even know Oli/anyone else is there, soz boy] Jimmy: [at least he can shamelessly check her out like 🤤 cos they are though] Janis: [we asking for the drink] Jimmy: [thanks for that Ian] Janis: [I hope you're bottom bunk if not enjoy the view everyone whilst you climb up, like] Jimmy: [for that reason alone he has to be top] Janis: ['I was bored without you'] Jimmy: ['you better stay for a bit then' obviously joins her up there because was making a show of looking out to check for teachers and all that nonsense 'at least til you ain't bored'] Janis: ['sounds like a plan' and a LOOK under the pretense they're probably standing about so can see, 'cos y'all ain't gonna be on the bottom bunk together are you] Jimmy: [a LOOK back before you open the bottle for her because gentlemanly not cos you're stalling nope] Janis: ['Slainte' and taking a shot whilst maintaining that ♙ eye contact] Jimmy: [does the thing where he takes the bottle from her but instead of taking a drink he pulls her into him but I'm gonna say that her hair is down so they can't see what he's doing because the truth is nothing yet even though it looks like he's kissing her neck or whatever because he's a good boy and he wants to know it's okay first so a LOOK which is actually an unspoken question lol] Janis: [taking the bottle back and putting it down on top of the wardrobe or whatever in reply like yeah, let's go for it, partly to prove you're down for the plan and not scared and also 'cos you know Oli will get too awks and make them all leave if you actually do anything so it won't have to be a Thing for ages, like] Jimmy: [goes in for the first kiss and it's obviously EVERYTHING goodbye] Janis: [rip you two, it's DEFINITELY continuing after they out the door, even if for a hot sec, you are that blatant, like, just in case they forgot something or whatever] Jimmy: [duh it'd ruin everything if they forgot their vape and came back and you weren't still going] Janis: [just dedicated to the act, alright] Jimmy: [he doesn't know they're related so lowkey surprised they left so fast and of course gutted we know but acting unfazed by having that drink finally] Jimmy: [bit rude cos that makes it seem like you hated it but okay boy] Janis: [not about to bring it up before or after, just hopping down like ta-da and looking at the window so casually] Jimmy: goes to the window and 🚬 out of it cos still offended she asked you if you vape] Janis: [sniffs like she seeing if it's 🍧🍦🧁🍰🎂🍭🍬 🍫 or nah] Jimmy: [blows a smoke ring at her but in a sassy way not a Harley aggressively blowing smoke at Ro back in the day way] Janis: [still wafting it away like we're Mia levels of disgusted but 😏 'cos not] Jimmy: [turning back to the window but obvs amused, we're all 😏 rn] Janis: ['they'll tell everyone, Nathan has a big mouth' looks around the room like 'what are we gonna do for at least 15 minutes, so you don't get THAT rep'] Jimmy: ['does look a bit like if Mick Jagger fucked some local lass and weren't feeling the need to shout about it for obvious reasons' looks at the bottle wherever he left that and back at her with a shrug 'fancy a game of chess?']] Janis: [snorts 'we'd all know about it anyway, no one 'round here can keep a secret' follows his eyes with hers and nods 'alright'] Jimmy: [IRL 🤞 and checks his phone we know he's checking on Cass and Bobby but it looks like he's checking if people are saying shit yet so, picks the bottle back up, takes a swing and passes it back to her] Janis: [when a thought #hits and you get your phone and as you're taking your swig you do some searching and put some sex sounds on and put your phone under a pillow to convincingly muffle it and 🤫 at him like speak quiet if you're gonna] Jimmy: [🙄 but also nod because it's a good idea] Janis: [nudges him as she walks back to give him the bottle 'you want me to be -' mimes 🤐 '-or you expect me to sit here and do it myself?' pointing at the phone like no thank you] Jimmy: ['I get it, everyone's so desperate to fuck you or know what it'd be like they've got their ears pressed to the door'] Janis: [shrugs like yes, your point?] Jimmy: [gets back on his bed and gets comfy so she'll have to get on either Ollie's bed below or his if she wants to talk to him cos shh] Janis: [🙄 and a dramatic sigh but fake is sexy but you're 😒] Jimmy: [texting his sister for a while but then his phone is blowing up because people are scandalised so he chucks it at her so she can see] Janis: ['phase one complete' shaking her head as she reads a bit but then chucking it back like a hot 🥔 'probably have to eat dinner at the same table'] Jimmy: [nods but when he's thinking about everyone watching them his own idea hits and it's the lovebites so he gestures for her to come here] Janis: [climbing up this bed again like ugh, excuse me] Jimmy: [I think to think she's as far away as she can be so he's like 'come here' but we whispering of course so it's accidentally hot] Janis: [assumedly, and we are questioning this but we also aren't 'cos we do come closer, obviously] Jimmy: [reaches out and touches her hair, moving it away from her neck and looking at that as yet unbruised skin and we know he's thinking if she has her hair up everyone else will be seeing that too so he looks at her and you know it's meant to be a look like do you see where I'm going with this but it's shamelessly just a LOOK] Janis: [when you automatically bring your hand up to move his away like oi, excuse me but you catch up with this being part of the plan so then you're just holding his hand there 'good thinking' when again, you have to whisper so it all just sounds so much hotter and #intoit than it would if you could just speak but soz, you can't] Jimmy: [looks at her phone under the pillow still playing those saucy sex sounds 'could just google how to fake 'em' cos you know people have blatantly done that but then he's looking at her again and licking his lips and generally being hot af] Janis: [shakes head 'that's more effort' taking the phone and turning them off, like, how suggestive like are you gonna be making the noises now too or what 'meant to make our lives easier, yeah?'] Jimmy: [holds her hair out of the way which is also lowkey hot soz not soz and goes in cos unspoken challenge accepted on getting her to make better noises than that] Janis: [we out here doing the most] Jimmy: [god bless] Janis: [know we giving him some in the process, only fair, not like we need to] Jimmy: [there's no hiding behind your hair boy and that's the only flimsy excuse we need] Janis: [and we need to be THAT obvious so everyone knows, duh] Jimmy: [like she said, gotta make both of their lives easier not only make one of 'em look swag, very much mutual and both #goals thank you] Janis: [exactly, we're fucking off and over the flat whites and co, not each other] Jimmy: [thank god she turned off the sounds because there's no stopping him from making any and we need to pretend it's OTT fake at this point instead of him being THAT into it already] Janis: ['you're a good actor' 'cos you said you'd say it] Jimmy: ['you're -' we're not finishing that because he hasn't said it loud enough to style it into a fake compliment] Janis: [biting his bottom lip 'cos you weren't kissing for long enough so you simply gotta so they're more bruised] Jimmy: [I love that you could've just bitten your own but more fun for everyone like that because you know he'd follow suit and do the same for her] Janis: [we need to be thorough here, that might not be enough] Jimmy: [hence just lowkey making out now but I think we should have a teacher catch them cos Mia or Ella snitched to cockblock because in the OG they had that punishment to clean everyone else's rooms and they stole their shit and I think we should still do that cos it was a mood but in the OG they had that punishment cos they snuck off to the pub which they don't need to because Ian's stash is a thing this time] Janis: [agree fully because a. they would and b. the teacher can be so shame-y and then everyone will hear if said teacher is going off and then bitching about them to the other teachers] Jimmy: [yeah it's a much better idea and an actual decent way to cockblock so they don't just hook up rn] Janis: [I'm with it, 'cos we can steal someone else's booze if theirs also gets confiscated for bonus scandal points] Jimmy: [love that] Janis: [okay, so dinner after we've been bollocked and everyone is shooketh, not allowed to sit together so] Jimmy: [oooh we should say Grace is putting make up on her love bites for her because that is a way to draw even more attention to it cos lowkey in the midst of dinner here] Janis: [gets out kit lmao] Jimmy: [exactly and a reason for her to be like Grace you need to sit with me so Mia is seething] Janis: [what did you think would come of this really, Mia, there's only so much 'trouble' they can get into and they don't care] Jimmy: [and like if you thought Grace would be embarrassed and that would drive a wedge you haven't considered that 1. she's a hoe 2. so much worse shit gets said about the cali fam as standard] Janis: [it's gonna get worse if they come in your room later in this trip so like, blow your load now alright girl] Jimmy: [which needs to happen because that was the fake injury moment and was iconic] Janis: [mhmm] Janis: OI DICKHEAD REMEMBER TO LOOK 😍 WHEN YOU READ THIS 😘 Jimmy: [does a real little lol and then looks at her IRL with fake longing] Jimmy: Alright? Janis: 👌 Janis: No one is gonna think it's over this food, so yeah, it'll do Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: bit rude they're trying to poison us before we do it ourselves Janis: tell he's the maths teacher Janis: not following the plot here Jimmy: might 🔪 the messenger if he's going that hard with the Shakespeare but alright Jimmy: I'll obvs die for you Janis: the bruises aren't that bad Jimmy: they look 🥇 from here Janis: [a LOOK from across the room] Janis: done the job, like Jimmy: [one back of course that's really lingering to really make the point] Jimmy: as they go, pissing about with you for a bit's not as bad as cleaning 🚽 Jimmy: don't get a massive head over it but Janis: unlikely Janis: generous and forthcoming with the 🥇 compliments as you are Jimmy: Oi, don't forget my 🥇💡 Janis: you got your recognition Jimmy: piss easy to get more Janis: obviously Janis: but what next Janis: aside from all this nerd flirting business Jimmy: Depends Janis: ? Jimmy: how you feeling? Jimmy: you look a bit cold to me Janis: [looks down at nips lmao] Jimmy: [he wants to lol but is 😏 cos he comes over to her and puts his hoodie on her, like enjoy the show everyone] Janis: alright, fairplay Janis: [snuggling in like full smug suck it everyone] Jimmy: check the pockets 🎁💕 Jimmy: [has drawn her something and written a little love note for the added brag] Janis: [making a big show of being extra secretive and trying to look at it privately so everyone on the table is 👀] Jimmy: [he made sure it was extra thankfully in case they can see and didn't write like oi dickhead] Janis: I'll 📸 it later Janis: was 🤞 for some 🚬s Jimmy: I've kept hold of them Jimmy: find me later Janis: very see me after class vibes Janis: alright Jimmy: if you wanna stick your uniform on for the 📸 go ahead, mate Janis: 💔 I didn't bring it with Janis: could wait but Jimmy: 💀👑 will be, mad for a uniform, her Janis: so I've heard Janis: what is it then, little apron Jimmy: [sends the CG instagram cos he won't have random pics of himself in his uniform on his phone] Janis: very Janis: starbucks lite Jimmy: they'll be 🎻💔😭 Janis: delete this comment 'fore I hit send Jimmy: already @ed it to 'em Janis: 🐍 you are Jimmy: got the fang marks to prove it, you Janis: now she's punched us with a brush as well quite sore tbh Jimmy: poor baby Janis: yes you're very concerned Janis: Mr Lucas is Jimmy: gutted he can't kiss you better is what he is Janis: idk, maybe he's 🎻💔😭 'cos you've ruined me Jimmy: very old school, that Jimmy: you're alright, I got no STI's Janis: @him Jimmy: what's his @? Janis: @virginsonly Jimmy: did he used to work at the local catholic or what? Janis: just to the point and selective, I think Jimmy: now I'm 🎻💔😭 Jimmy: why ain't I good enough for you sir? Fucking LOVE me, like Janis: and scene 🎬👏 Jimmy: Hang on, I need to be standing on this table Janis: 😏 Janis: love that for him, you fully crack after what, a month or so of bumming Jimmy: when you know you know, mate Jimmy: what we've got is SO real Janis: of course it is Jimmy: speaking of, what are we doing in a bit? Janis: having a 🚬 Janis: you said Jimmy: I mean are we 🎻💔😭 apart like 🤓 or 💕 together like 😎 Jimmy: how do you want the 🎬? Jimmy: can do loads with socials either @ or with Janis: whatever she says Janis: or fucks Janis: 🤓 is how she actually kicks it so Janis: 😎 is better Janis: what can they do, send us home Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: pay for my cab 'cos not gonna get my mum out here Janis: starcrossed love is the way to go, so, max sneaking for 💘 Jimmy: Alright Janis: you don't give a shit, right? Jimmy: about what? Janis: potential trouble, this trips' educational value, etc Jimmy: What kind of question is that? Janis: just making sure Jimmy: [comes over to her again and whispers in her ear 'there's your answer' cos he really gives a shit about absolutely nothing rn and the teachers would be fuming cos stop it boy] Janis: [when the 😏 is real 'cos likewise, cares about nothing and is so bored of everyone and everything but obvs the quick kiss is to piss 'em off further] Jimmy: [when you turn it into more a kiss ™ as if you can't not because you can't get enough of her but not so much that you're Mia on the coach about it] Janis: [know people are gonna be highkey anyways like why not lads] Jimmy: [exactly and loads of 'em are putting it on their stories etc blatantly so] Janis: [#exposure] Jimmy: [I feel like the teachers should make either him or her go to their room because the kind of bullshit that achieves nothing like are you gonna make sure they stay there or what] Janis: [literally, like oh, without supervision, at least you've been smart enough to just send the one but still, it should be him I think] Janis: 🍀 Jimmy: [sends a pic of him on his bed really comfy like but if anyone sees it looks like an I wish you were here kinda thing instead of rubbing it in lol] Janis: twat Janis: i've got to stay here and do fucking 'fun' team building bullshit Jimmy: if you can't get yourself sent out, then you can't, babe Jimmy: if any dickhead were capable of 🥇 you wouldn't need me Janis: 😒 Janis: they aren't gonna send us both out, even they aren't quite that thick Janis: rude Jimmy: they can't stop you going for a piss, even Mia's dad would win that case and he is that thick Jimmy: you don't go back and what? Janis: they definitely go to our rooms Janis: so where are we going? Jimmy: where do you wanna go? Janis: wherever, far away enough from the windows and we'll be alright Jimmy: Come on then Janis: post that pic whilst you're waiting Jimmy: [does obviously] Janis: [posts his doodle in the comments of people saying how cute he is like IKR] Jimmy: you're a good actor an' all Janis: Take my bow as I make my escape Jimmy: head that big, ain't an easy feat not to topple over Janis: what I'm hearing is, you think I'm well impressive Jimmy: didn't realise you were deaf, my little brother will be chuffed to bits Janis: not gonna fake meet your family Janis: calm yourself down, boy Jimmy: weren't asking you to Jimmy: steady on, girl Janis: mhmm, what was that? Janis: my selective hearing couldn't make it out Jimmy: [sends a voice memo but instead of calling her a dickhead or something because he doesn't know where she is rn and who might here it's like I SAID COME HERE] Jimmy: [*hear I cannot type today at all] Janis: 👏 Janis: I am omw Janis: please make sure you are decent Jimmy: as an actor? 👌 Janis: was thinking don't open the door naked either Janis: but maybe those two can't coexist Jimmy: stop thinking about me naked, Judith Janis: you started it Jimmy: Calm yourself down, so bloody extra, you Janis: oh sorry, didn't know I was in a groupchat with the GALS Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Janis: prepare to be that #shook Janis: [turn up to collect him] Jimmy: [does an IRL equivalent of 😱] Janis: ['come on, kev' 😏] Jimmy: [we out of here] Janis: [go for your smoke lads 'so what #content are we getting out of this?'] Jimmy: [they should do the sexy blowback thing purely for #content obvs] Janis: [purely, mhmm] Jimmy: [and I vote she should sit on his lap for the first time cos casual 🚬 photoshoot happening] Janis: [gotta make sure you're in shot, all of this is well necessary] Jimmy: [you wouldn't wanna be out of frame and have to take these pics all over again oh no] Janis: [that would just not be on brand, arty boy] Jimmy: [I love how extra you two are immediately, it's literally my fave thing] Janis: [fully could have stayed in your room and been like ha soz but no] Jimmy: [you should wanna be caught but we know why you don't] Janis: [the tea, the pretense of taking videos and pics is so flimsy but at least you tried and didn't just go to makeout] Jimmy: [and at least there will be actual #content because anything that annoys Mia gives me life] Janis: [exactly dr phil you're allowed] Jimmy: [what else can these little rebhogs do?] Janis: [maybe if the teachers are looking for her again, and now him 'cos checked their rooms, they can come back in together and be like, it's not fair to leave Jimmy out 'cos not and then just be couply af whilst doing whatever evening activity 'til bed] Jimmy: [I'll allow it because their teachers are clearly shit and like they've already given them their punishment to clean up everyone's rooms tomorrow so as far as they are concerned job done] Janis: [can't stop teen hormones and didn't come on the trip to be in his room so yolo, then Mia will be annoyed again 'cos no one is getting in trouble] Jimmy: [yeah she'd be trying to cause shit in this activity no doubt, ooh maybe that's when she or Ella gets hurt and makes a meal of it so it's not even the same day as Janis they are just trying to milk it that hard] Janis: [a mood, can also put an end to everyone's fun low-key, tah ladies] Jimmy: no oscar for her Janis: How is she that bad at it when she's faked every boy she's been with is Mia? Janis: poor show Jimmy: brb I gotta @ my dad to tell him my brother ain't the biggest cry baby going and pour bleach into my eyes and ears Janis: bit insensitive on the ears but yeah Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: *🤢 Jimmy: 💀#2💕💀👑 Janis: it has been a few hours since they last purged probs Janis: explains everything Jimmy: tah for another lovely visual Jimmy: SUCH #couplegoals them Janis: your toothbrush is my toothbrush, babe Jimmy: I were thinking if you come round early enough in the morning without waking Gracie when you do we can make it look like you stayed and we're sneaking you out when the dickhead I'm sharing with wakes up Janis: That's a good idea Janis: she gets up early, so it'd feel more like late night but still works Janis: they should all be up to, even if their end result is more 'natural' Jimmy: be piss easy to make sure enough of 'em see you then Jimmy: me an' all when I walk you back Janis: right to the door Janis: well gentlemanly Janis: less so if I invite you in for round two but that depends who's seen and who's still watching, obvs Jimmy: 💰 on Mr Lucas from the bushes Janis: 🤞 Janis: nice to know he still cares, like Jimmy: it's all #bants til he comes out of the shrubs with a 💍 Janis: 😬 Jimmy: soz mate, bit rude to get your hopes up Janis: now you can't read facial expressions 😎boy Jimmy: never said I could Jimmy: just lips, and I ain't looking at yours unless the rest of the dickheads are 👀 at us Janis: facetime goodnight would be a little much Jimmy: unless 💀👑 is tucked up with Grace while her missus is in sick bay Janis: thankfully not Janis: can't come in without being invited Jimmy: you'd know about that vampire girl Janis: says you Janis: very tender, as I previously mentioned Jimmy: I did say it, yeah, and I previously mentioned how sympathetic I was an' all Janis: not your most convincing work Jimmy: 💔 Janis: yeah, you should feel bad Jimmy: for which bit? Janis: your shit performance Janis: obvs Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: I ain't given a single shit performance Janis: your sympathy just seems very disingenuous to me Jimmy: Baby, I'm so sorry Janis: more like it Janis: believe you've done this before now Jimmy: done what before, said sorry or left a lass needing a 🩹? Janis: had a girlfriend Janis: soz Mr Lucas Jimmy: no need to @ him Janis: another secret to keep? Janis: I dunno Jimmy: the secret that I ain't gay is already out, mate Janis: devastated Janis: gay bff is probably well more up their street than boyfriend tbh Jimmy: probably not too late to go for that Jimmy: if you really wanna Jimmy: come round and I'll plait your hair or some bollocks Jimmy: you already know my crushes Janis: 🤢 Janis: is what I think to that suggestion Janis: 💘 easier to fake Jimmy: for you 'cause I'm well fit and mysterious Janis: for me 'cos I don't have to talk to you half as much this way Jimmy: you can be the strong silent type any way we play this, Jasmine Jimmy: it's alright Janis: nah Janis: as I said, the straight girls will be more up on you, if anything Janis: and the gay boys would actually be 💔 from the queer bait so probs don't Jimmy: #whenshecaresaboutsparingyoudickpicDMs Jimmy: I get it, I don't deserve you, sweetheart Janis: don't have time to count all the ways you're so lucky to have me Janis: cataloging all these dick pics Jimmy: be a #goals tweet though Jimmy: hang on fans, I'm so lucky I ran out of characters Janis: have that for free Janis: need to up my cute though Janis: not my fault I can't draw Jimmy: yeah you can Jimmy: that 🎨 of Mia and her dad cracking onto each other was a top masterpiece Jimmy: [is tweeting about how lucky he is to have her obvs] Janis: you're a sick, sick boy Jimmy: came from your 🧠 girl Jimmy: I just appreciated it, what you do with #art Janis: never said I weren't as well Janis: have to admit they might have us both beat though Jimmy: true 💕 Jimmy: nowt we can do to compete with owt that real Jimmy: or that twisted Janis: unless you are 45 Janis: little bit of tan and we could sell that you're my dad Jimmy: Northern 45 is a southern twat's 95 Jimmy: dunno if black face is the way to go though, mate Jimmy: ain't worked out brilliantly for loads of others Janis: you wanted twisted Jimmy: but the deal is, when you want me 💀💀💀 you do the deed yourself Jimmy: don't need Bill rising from ⚰ pissed off about another rewrite Janis: alright, pair of spoilsports Janis: how you wanna go out then Janis: 💣 🧨 🪓 🔪 🗡 ⚔️ 💊 💉 🪒 Jimmy: lasses first, would hate to ✔ your fave Jimmy: loads you missed an' all Jimmy: 🏑🏏🏹⛸🔧🔨🛁 Janis: 🤔 Janis: probably 🔪 Janis: or 🔨 maybe Janis: most personal Janis: how about you? Jimmy: Depends Jimmy: are we gonna do #matching or different? Janis: You only get one Janis: I'll kill you any way you like Jimmy: hot Janis: 🔥 Janis: but I won't be cuddling up to your crispy corpse Jimmy: Fuck me, I forgot one an' all! Janis: I mean, possibilities are endless Janis: but 💏 🤵👰 🤰 👶 is boring and not worth mentioning Jimmy: don't try and make me feel better, baby, fuming I am Jimmy: and now I dunno if I want 🔪 for the wound 🎨 or 🔨 for the 🩸 splatter 🎨 Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: I'll stab you but not let you bleed out Janis: take some #aes photos and then 🔨 final blow Janis: there you go Jimmy: that's the cutest thing I've ever heard, you don't need to work on nowt Jimmy: 🥇 you Janis: I'd screenshot asap then, if Mia wouldn't call the 👮 like the concerned Karen she is Jimmy: [writes some actual cute shit that everybody will eat up] Jimmy: type that out and screenshot it Janis: nice that you 💘 yourself so much that you can think of all that 😏 Janis: [does though] Jimmy: piss easy when they don't know who I am Janis: yeah Janis: don't need to tell me Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: it's the shit they do know that's unavoidable Janis: like Mick Jagger being my dad Jimmy: bit rude he didn't teach you nowt about how to perform but I'll carry us both til you figure it out Janis: got the opposite in writing somewhere in this convo Janis: don't be bitter 'cos I'm 🥇 without having to do as much Jimmy: You're only that good if you can do his hip move Jimmy: and there's not gonna be any evidence of that about anywhere Janis: not that committed to the bit, rat boy Jimmy: there you go then Jimmy: take 🥈 and piss off, bad blood Janis: you piss off, dickhead Jimmy: or what? Janis: I'll smack you Jimmy: go on Jimmy: hit me hard enough and I can get out of doing our bollocks punishment Janis: I think not Janis: I'll go to the sick bay and you can carry cleanup too as you're so smug Jimmy: I get it, you miss El Jimmy: she is a fucking delight Janis: it's like she's constantly on the blob, which is ironic Jimmy: she's given 💀👑 her 🩸💦 and 😥 today Jimmy: if anyone's smug it'll be that pair Janis: unacceptable Janis: especially after I made smoking the opposite of GROSS Jimmy: we've done alright Janis: it'll be 🤯 come morning though Jimmy: you reckon? Janis: don't you? Jimmy: I reckon she needs to 👀 it for herself to be 🤯 Janis: maybe Janis: she's got form for being that bitch Jimmy: if we can't guarantee she'll be about in the morning, we'll have to do something when she is later Janis: yeah Janis: no need to put out the 🔥 before this bullshit trip is over Janis: even by their standards, not a good look Jimmy: right Janis: after that Janis: not got to think about them or that shithole for three weeks so Jimmy: you're decent at pillow talk, Jenna Janis: 👍 Janis: how do we end this Janis: in a way that still fucks them off somehow Jimmy: How do they get chucked? Jimmy: just do the opposite when you decide to bin me off Janis: when? Jimmy: Dunno when I'll be pissing off out of 🍀 yet Jimmy: but 🤞 you won't see me back at school Janis: I get it Janis: we used to move around a lot, when we were younger, I don't remember it much Jimmy: if Ian's still being a knobhead and I am about, do it then Janis: alright Jimmy: alright, give me a bell when you're on your way back to my door, I'll get you in without waking him Janis: he's a heavy sleeper Jimmy: how do you know? Janis: my cousin Janis: used to be closer, when we was kids, sleepovers n shit Jimmy: you should've said Jimmy: wouldn't have made you put on a show in front of him Janis: I don't care Janis: why he left in a hurry though Jimmy: do you want me to meet you at yours in a bit instead? Janis: can do Janis: more guarantee of seeing them then Janis: come to vet her outfit or whatever Jimmy: what time's Grace up? Jimmy: I'll be there an hour before, still give me time to get in and us set up if she wakes any earlier Janis: Our first thing is at 9, yeah? Janis: if she's having breakfast, 6.30, if not, 7 Janis: 6 should be fine Jimmy: 👍 Janis: get some sleep Janis: not enough you don't look shagged out, of course Jimmy: how you were going on earlier I thought she were gonna get up before the sun bothered Janis: I forgot Janis: school's earlier and our bus takes even longer Janis: she has to go to bed like a 👵 Jimmy: bet that goes down well with the lads Janis: dunno Janis: that's what weekends are for, right Jimmy: Dunno Jimmy: my ex near enough moved herself in Jimmy: very #goals obvs Janis: she don't last long enough to do that Jimmy: didn't need to Sherlock that Jimmy: goes without saying or sleuthing Janis: 🐇🐇🐇 Jimmy: shut up and get to bed Janis: rude Jimmy: is it? Jimmy: or is it thoughtful and 💕? Janis: put out a twitter poll if you like Janis: I'll be here not sleeping Jimmy: Alright, sod you then Janis: sweet dreams Jimmy: never said I were sleeping Janis: tell me if we're posting it and I'll fake enthusiasm at whatever you're doing instead Janis: don't want the sexts to be one-sided Jimmy: we should probably be together by now far as the fans know Jimmy: you're alright Janis: true Janis: mutual masturbation less of a flex Jimmy: Save it for the LDR Janis: you're alright, won't make you do it when you get home Janis: find a new fake boyf to keep them off my dick Jimmy: you can't dump me the second I do one, wouldn't be #goals Jimmy: starcrossed is our brand, mate Janis: awh, babe, you'd do that for me?! 💕 Jimmy: and myself, fuck all's gonna change when I leave here Jimmy: not just being racist against paddys, like Janis: if you go back, won't you have all your mates Jimmy: and what? Janis: well, you won't be new boy Janis: no one needs to follow you about and generally be a massive tit, like Jimmy: home's got bigger tits Jimmy: if that's where we go, and if not, new town, same bollocks Janis: well, LDR even easier Janis: can drop you an OTT caption whenever Jimmy: that'll be why I propositioned you again, my dear Janis: what does that mean? Jimmy: you said it, this is about making our lives easier Jimmy: wouldn't force you into an LDR if it were some 🎻🎻 hardship Janis: yeah Janis: alright Jimmy: what? Janis: I meant when you first asked, for now Jimmy: You wanna know why I asked? Janis: yeah Janis: me, specifically, I know why we're doing it Jimmy: 'cause I could do Jimmy: and we're both fit and mysterious, duh Janis: 👌 Jimmy: Go on, why did you say yeah? Janis: 'cos I'm fit and mysterious, why else Jimmy: 👌 Janis: forget I asked Jimmy: Why? I reckon it's what you'd call a valid question Janis: 'cos you didn't tell me anything I didn't know already Jimmy: everyone knows how fit you are Janis: not all wearing 😎 Jimmy: there you go then Janis: bed now Jimmy: save telling me what to do for when there's loads of dickheads about to see and hear how well I do it Janis: it's a polite way to tell you to shut up Jimmy: northern, not that thick Jimmy: take the compliment, dickhead Janis: don't need it Janis: my head is massive as is Jimmy: What do you need? Jimmy: 🚬? Janis: couldn't hurt Janis: what the packets say, right Jimmy: Close enough, come here Janis: [show up] Jimmy: [we know the drill he's lighting up for you gal, god knows how long you've been out there boy dealing the drama that is Ian looking after his own kids for an evening] Janis: [we smoking in silence] Jimmy: [what a nice throwback to the PE moment that started all this] Janis: [Ella stay away] Jimmy: [everyone leave them be tbh] Janis: [when so much drama has gone down already like the levels of not expecting this] Jimmy: [we are so rude soz lads] Janis: [we all know who's fault it actually is, and also that you're about it so Jimmy: [even if neither of you expected to be this about it and are now shooketh] Janis: [hence what is lowkey an awkward silence but both of you usually are so you can play it ain't] Jimmy: [so casual so fine] Janis: [again, not as if you've chosen to spend time together when you don't need to] Jimmy: [makes me lol same as all these convos you're keeping going beyond needing to, but we should say he takes a pic of her under the pretence of like hm idk when I might need this/ we can use it to pretend you're with me if you're not at some point etc but it seems so rude like oh this is just a job every second I have to be doing something I deffo don't wanna spend any time with you just because] Jimmy: [but we know she really just looks beautiful and he's an art hoe] Janis: ['could've warned us, where was my two hours?'] Jimmy: [😏 and offers to take it again with a gesture but you know he's not deleting that OG pic ever] Janis: [🖕 like have that] Jimmy: [😘 like he did to sir when he left] Janis: [wiping her cheek like it hit her] Jimmy: [does a really fake look around for fans lurking] Janis: [raising brow like you know its just us] Jimmy: [shrug cos it's so casual so fine] Janis: [shrugs back but OTT like one up you] Jimmy: [lights a new 🚬 because 1. he's been out there ages so he would've been nearly done when she appeared 2. to prove that he don't feel awks at all and could stay here all night] Janis: [puts her hand out like gimme your lighter] Jimmy: [does but with a raised brow of his own] Janis: [just playing with it 'not suggesting arson, s'boring'] Jimmy: [💔 mime for the first time] Janis: ['poor baby'] Jimmy: [pouty little lip like baby me] Janis: [loling but reminded so 'I'll bite it off next time'] Jimmy: [irl 🤞] Janis: [🙄😏] Jimmy: [gets a snack of some kind out like better eat this while I still can then] Janis: ['did you not eat enough at dinner?'] Jimmy: [🙄😏 but chucks some at her] Janis: ['too busy staring, I remember'] Jimmy: ['bit busy getting chucked out 'cause you don't know owt about being cute'] Janis: [😒 'yeah, that's why'] Jimmy: ['gotta keep it goals if you can't, yeah'] Janis: ['fuck off'] Jimmy: [looks down at his 🚬 which he ain't done with like no shan't] Janis: ['do it by yourself then' 'cos done enough with yours to throw it like good day] Jimmy: [just looking at her like bye then] Janis: [👋 '6 o'clock'] Jimmy: [when you get right in her grill and it's really hot but then you just take your lighter back] Janis: [making an 'ugh' sound] Jimmy: [hasn't moved away so is still very much in her grill and just zipping her hoodie up which is actually his like it's such a long cold walk back when it's neither because you gotta prove that 'cute' comes that effortlessly to you obvs and she sucks but it's just hot because the tension] Janis: [pushing him back, not really hard or anything but enough to ramp up that tension] Jimmy: [when you say 'piss off then' but you're saying it like a challenge not to] Janis: [just looking at him like nah] Jimmy: [LOOKING at her] Janis: ['stop it' but again, a challenge] Jimmy: ['stop what?' because I dare you to acknowledge that something is happening here, gal] Janis: ['you know' 'cos likewise] Jimmy: ['you'] Janis: [points at him] Jimmy: [signs it] Janis: [gonna assume she knows what he's doing but not what he's saying here 'hardly fair'] Jimmy: [scoffs because nothing about any of this is fair or what he signed up for 'playing to win, not fair' but shows her how to do it and what it means then adding whatever he needs to add to change it into 'you're a dickhead' signed which makes me lol imagining what that probably is] Janis: ['alright, Mia' but 😏 and going with this impromptu lesson here] Jimmy: [having a lovely time as if all of that didn't just happen] Janis: [tralalalalala] Jimmy: [it's literally an immediate headfuck, well done lads] Janis: [lmao how could it not be tbh] Jimmy: [if it was actually all fake but we know it never has been or could be cos he chose her for a reason] Janis: [you could've chose someone well below you and just played 'em] Jimmy: [thank god you didn't sir because that wouldn't have been as fun on any level for any of us] Janis: [you aren't that sort of boy is the tea] Jimmy: [my softest in my army of soft boys is the tea] Janis: [mhmm, and you wouldn't have said yes, even though it does benefit you too, if you didn't think he was hot and intriguing so] Jimmy: [anyway teach her the sign for goodnight and then do one please Jimothy or else I won't be able to stop you from doing something which only works if someone appears or you think they have which is unlikely] Janis: [literally got to see each other in a few so time to go lol] Jimmy: [let's skip to him showing up at 6] Jimmy: Oi Janis: [letting him in as a response 'cos obvs up and ready, likewise gonna make you be top bunk so you have to do the most to be quiet] Jimmy: [we know if he's slept at all it's barely so that'll look legit, casually stripping so you can leave your clothes on the floor for Grace and Co to see which means he has to climb up there in just his pants lol] Janis: [likewise, especially after-all that tension but always really, casually looking away so dramatically as if you don't have to get in that single bed with him now] Jimmy: [looking at her while she's looking away because she hasn't gotten any uglier since you saw her last and you're like well fuck this is gonna be interesting] Janis: [oh lads what have you got yourselves into, coming up and casually giving yourselves as much space as you physically can 'cos not as if they're gonna burst in the door any second now and this is just casual, taking off your top so you're in your bra and shorts moment] Jimmy: [when you don't wanna stare at her doing that so you're looking down and it hits you that you're topless too but there's not a single bruise anywhere there so you're like ! and your hand automatically goes to your neck but your foot nudges her] Janis: [turning 'round like excuse me 'cos think he's just being annoying but then you look and then look some more 'til you're like 'oh' everything whispered as per, so then you look down at your own body like, yeah] Jimmy: [to casually avoid following her gaze down her own body because ofc you don't wanna look don't be silly looking at her hands to see how long her nails are, like are back scratches too far or wtf because this is the life we're living kids] Janis: [pretending you think he means he wants you to choke him and going for the throat 'cos cannot be serious about this rn] Jimmy: [so 😒 because she caught you off guard with that and you nearly said something along the lines of oi or piss off at normal volume so you're mad at yourself for being an amateur] Janis: [gently pushing his shoulder like soz but also come on 'you can go first then'] Jimmy: [pushing her down onto the bed slightly less gently but obvs not hard lol and going for it  because if you start to think or say something you'll be like this is too much wtf is my life rn and then you're look like even more of an amateur] Janis: [when once it's happening, you can bite your lip all you like but you didn't expect the push down so you can't stop yourself from making the noise] Jimmy: [don't worry gal because that noise would have got to him as much as the push got to you and you'll be able to get your own back soon] Janis: [when you don't wanna tell him to stop but that's purely 'cos you need to prove you got this, not that it's enjoyable or anything, nah] Jimmy: [I'm loling because he's really just going to town on her as if anyone's looking that closely even Mia ready to be like I don't think you really hooked up because there isn't a love bite there, I'm so sure a few would get the point across boy but okay] Janis: [like, the state of undress you don't need to be in April cannot be overstated, the teachers are gonna be fuming at the state of you two lmao] Jimmy: [also you don't need to have your hands on her in any way whatsoever while this is happening but you clearly do] Janis: [we doing the most to stay quiet here, like low-key shouldn't you make a little noise so you can be caught but nah, eventually you gotta blurt out 'come on' but do you mean stop or hurry up or more, we'll never know] Jimmy: [when you take it to mean hurry up like she's so over this because there's a big part of you that thinks she's totally faking this, thanks for those issues parentals so you do hurry up/stop losing yourself how you were for a bit there and go back to treating it like a job] Janis: [we can feel the difference and we're, surely not sad, no, who cares, not you babe, in fact, 'my turn' and flipping him so you on top now] Jimmy: [wasn't expecting that after what she said and how he interpreted it so 'fuck' escapes and we know it's not in an angry way] Janis: [just gotta go in on it too 'cos can't be thinking about that or this will go even further right now] Jimmy: [time to bite your own lip really hard jimothy because not only is this gonna feel incredible but when she's moving you can see at least some of the ones you've given her so] Janis: [we're going so much lower than we need to, like they can fill in the gaps without you doing a hickie on his hip like] Jimmy: [RIP this boy cos he's got no clothes on and nowhere to hide] Janis: [soz for the blueballing] Jimmy: [great way to start your day you won't be 😒 at all] Janis: [when it could lowkey be an hour 'til they wake up like what are you gonna do] Jimmy: [not gonna be able to casually nap after that lads] Janis: [have to find a way to fill the time] Jimmy: [we know what you wanna do but no no, gutted that you can't even stress smoke in case you wake her up by going outside] Janis: [lmao drag this out for as long as you can without turning him totally purple] Jimmy: [at least you'll have an excuse to do more on her if she's gone harder on you so you don't have to awkwardly sit there] Janis: [we know you're just making out without making out, like, 'cos no excuse for that] Jimmy: [shameless] Janis: [truly, then we just laying here like, 'cos can't even wake Grace up really 'cos need the others to see too so] Jimmy: [we all know she's not the real target audience, so just awkwardly stare at the ceiling and calm down kids cos it's too risky to look at each other rn] Janis: [or say anything, not just 'cos volume] Jimmy: [mhmm but when you feel up to it Jimothy you can take a look at yourself in your phone camera because DO NOT look at her like it's just a job and you're checking out how well she's done] Janis: [when you force yourself to look in his direction finally, 'cos you don't want him to potentially infer anything from your silence,  so you watch him do this, and then position your body is a mid-fuck kinda position like, go on then and mime 📸] Jimmy: [at least he can throw himself into the technical aspects of this photoshoot moment like a nerd so he doesn't have to think about how good she looks or how lowkey hot it is that you've gotta just move her around] Janis: [we're all pretending this is purely business, taking our own 📸 of him above you with his] Jimmy: [casual excuse to actually kiss for the 📸 which you think will make this tension better but actually makes it worse] Janis: [so 😤 on the low like thanks a lot] Jimmy: [such good practice for when you have to keep making out and breaking apart in the future as the flat whites go to and fro and a flex that you're so unfazed by any of this that you can stop whenever you want because it's SO fake but such agony actually] Janis: [just staying on your phone like this is casual and you have other things to do] Jimmy: [when I'm gonna start a convo purely because he wants her attention lol] Jimmy: nowt we've forgot is there? Janis: don't think so Janis: go down and get your t-shirt for me to protect my modesty once they get here Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you think you're such a pro at cute, suggest away, like Jimmy: can't bring you a ☕ much as they'd think that were #ultimategoals Janis: missing your steamer? Janis: s'nice Jimmy: have to get steamy in the 🚿 when they show up instead then Jimmy: won't be as cute 💔 Janis: don't put yourself down just 'cos they replace serotonin with caffeine 💘 Jimmy: thinking of you having to put up with me in another confined space Janis: I'm not actually getting in the shower with you Jimmy: [really fake shocked face like what??!] Jimmy: tah for clearing that up, mate, could've been a bit awkward Janis: [pushing him like 🙄] Janis: shut up Jimmy: [mimes 🤐 as he pushes her back so that's lowkey sexy excuse you boy] Janis: [turning your back on him like boy bye but there's 0 way that's not a spooning situation so] Jimmy: [living for the excuse to touch her hair because it's in your grill] Janis: you reckon we should Jimmy: ? Janis: 🚿 Janis: or was you joking Jimmy: don't you want a bit of time behind a locked door? Janis: in an ideal world you wouldn't be there but yeah, 'course Jimmy: forget I am Janis: easier said than done Janis: 😏 Jimmy: 👻 Jimmy: shouldn't be no challenge in it Janis: you leave marks Janis: poltergeist motherfucker Jimmy: [does a there there pat on her back] Jimmy: should've stopped me if I hurt you Janis: [kicking back] Janis: yeah right Jimmy: [retaliates like oi] Janis: [playfight 'I'll hurt you'] Jimmy: ['go on' because we're forever one challenge away from going too far] Janis: ['it doesn't count if you ask for it' but we LOOKING at him] Jimmy: [LOOKING back at her because always 'weren't like I said please'] Janis: ['where are your manners?'] Jimmy: [leans way further in than he needs to for whispering 'not that good of an actor' okay we get it Jimothy you think you're so 😎 and a bad boy but you not okay deal with it] Janis: [when you 'ha!' at practically normal volume such is your disbelief at this, sir] Jimmy: [putting a finger to her lips like shh because why just say it when you could be saucy as hell] Janis: [biting said finger as if this will actually hurt and not just add to this vibe alright] Jimmy: [pulling her hair by that same logic] Janis: [matching that 'fuck-' energy of his from earlier but adding '-you' in any vain attempt at saving face as you take his hand from your hair and pin it above your heads] Jimmy: [1000% is allowing this and is about to kiss her so we're gonna have to say that like Grace's alarm goes off or something to remind y'all what you're meant to be doing here] Janis: [when it's fine that the 'shit!' comes out 'cos it's showtime anyways] Jimmy: [pretend to be asleep kids that way you can take a sec and a deep breath] Janis: [lowkey hiding under these covers rn] Jimmy: [#mood cos Grace is gonna be so shook that Jimmy is here] Janis: [like soz girl] Jimmy: [run to the bathroom gal, it's fine he's not looking at you] Janis: [just don't run out screaming tah] Jimmy: [do we wanna say that the flatwhites all assemble here to get ready so they have to put on more of a show or say they show up in a bit so they don't?] Janis: [hmm, oh, maybe for the drama they show up later like let's ride 'cos obviously they don't KNOW this has gone down so then Mia will be really pissed off with Grace like um why did you not tell us so then they'll be being dicks to her again moreso?] Jimmy: [okay I love that, makes Grace get changed because she's mad, fuck you fashion police] Janis: [something even more unsuitable, lucky you don't break a leg she's already clumsy you know this] Jimmy: [also OMG you know we said they should see Mia cheat on Pablo it should be the boy that Grace was flirting with when they won that activity] Janis: [deffo, like that's what you get] Jimmy: [but for now she's in the bathroom getting ready with music on so like enjoy your awks alone time JJ] Janis: [at least you can get up, 'cos you know she'll be ages, and open the window to get some air] Jimmy: [lowkey just waking your siblings up for school like oi don't be late without me there or sort you out] Jimmy: [*to] Janis: [putting his top on for now, even if it's purely to whip it off when the flat whites arrive 'cos that effortless ladies, cry about it] Jimmy: [like you could put your trousers on boy but we know you won't] Janis: [like makes sense for your purpose but it's so distracting] Jimmy: [clearly you hope it is cos you're still dying over everything that happened and don't wanna be the only one] Janis: [we know you both are but keep doing the most to hide it like that's even possible god bless] Jimmy: [just casually making himself so comfy in this bed she got out of like everything's fine] Janis: [shaking her head] Jimmy: [a look like what?] Janis: [quieter but no need to whisper fully 'do this often?'] Jimmy: [says the 'what?' this time] Janis: [eyes in the direction of the bathroom like, let's not give the whole thing away, yeah 'you know'] Jimmy: ['what kind of question's that?' because imagine if that was the life he was living just fake girlfriends everywhere lol] Janis: [shrugs 'you look very at home'] Jimmy: [🙄 as he makes himself even more comfy, like there's no way he could actually get any sleep til the flatwhites come but that's what he's pretending] Janis: [tuts 'my bed, you know'] Jimmy: [eyes closed and a fake yawn 'not a very #goals attitude that, meant to be about what's yours being mine, as my missus'] Janis: ['yeah, well, I'm meant to hog the covers, not you the entire bed'] Jimmy: ['come here then'] Janis: [human equivalent of ?] Jimmy: [makes space for her and pulls back the covers like you heard me] Janis: [you know this isn't a good idea but look weird if you don't now, like sure let's totally snooze mhmm] Jimmy: [deliberately chucking all the covers over her like 😏] Janis: [cocoons self 'thanks, dick'] Jimmy: [pulls them back off and you think he's gonna start a playfight or be a dick in some way but he just takes the t-shirt off her and throws it back on the floor as if they are actually gonna fall asleep and miss the flatwhites arrival in any way, we see you boy, how intimate and suggestive of you] Janis: [just staring, shooketh 'I might've been cold'] Jimmy: [tucks her back in cos you're a soft boy and you have to make sure she isn't just in case she wasn't joking and snuggling into her because 1.warmth 2. you don't know how long Grace takes in the bathroom 3.lack of space doesn't really give you a choice but to spoon] Janis: ['so weird, new boy' but soft and letting it all happen, obvs] Jimmy: [shhing her but even softer because their weirdness is meant to be a secret if they are gonna be goals and also duh it's sleepy time™ except not at all] Janis: [pressing back into him and turning your head back purely to whisper 'and rude' like gurl] Jimmy: [making a sound because of that movement that we can try and pretend is an exasperated sigh but obviously isn't] Janis: [shhing him like 😏] Jimmy: [writes some kind of insult on her with his fingertip than she won't be able to make out because it's the first time basically] Janis: [excessive wriggling like don't tickle me] Jimmy: [DYING rn so he can't even say anything or do anything but try not to die] Janis: ['shell be forever, you know'] Jimmy: [me just like oh no how am I gonna cockblock this and it's literally been a day lol] Janis: ['your roommate won't be up, is what I'm saying, if we've got any chance of getting a shower today'] Jimmy: [just looking at her because the last thing you wanna do rn is move unless it's closer to her but she obviously can't see you looking at her so you have to say something boy 'you don't reckon that might wake him up?'] Janis: ['I don't reckon he fancies you so much he'll get out of his pit just to 'catch' you in the shower, no' pausing for a bit before shrugging 'it was your idea, like'] Jimmy: ['my idea for when we had an audience' but shrugs back] Janis: ['I'm going then, before we do, be right back' getting up] Jimmy: [obvs going with cos he doesn't wanna stay here on his own] Janis: ['can take it in turns, I weren't saying-' gestures like you know, even though you definitely were you've taken his response as a message to cool down, getting your toiletries and heading for the door] Jimmy: [following her as soon as you've got enough clothes on] Janis: [sneksnek] Jimmy: [take a cold shower it's very much needed] Janis: [let you go first boy] Jimmy: [please don't take forever or she's just there watching her cousin sleep] Janis: [bit weird lmao] Jimmy: [imagine how awks when he comes out and she goes in and they just do that switcharoo that'd be weird too] Janis: [hope you've put more clothes on, you definitely haven't] Jimmy: [soz not soz] Janis: you can go back if you want Janis: or go, if you're over it Jimmy: over what? Janis: waiting for them Janis: we've done shit they'll see still regardless Jimmy: are you saying you're over it? Janis: I'm saying you don't need to sit there whilst I shower if you don't wanna Jimmy: I don't need to do owt I don't want to, and I don't need you to tell me that Jimmy: if you're gonna be ages like your sister, say so Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: don't get your hair wet unless you wanna fake some weird kink, we're meant to be asleep Janis: now you wanna tell me what to do, cam down Jimmy: you started it Janis: God, I was just saying Jimmy: just leave it out instead Janis: whatever Jimmy: it ain't my fault they ain't about yet Janis: it's not mine, either Jimmy: and I ain't being a dickhead to you about it Janis: 1. I weren't, I was literally saying go if you're fed up, how is that anything but polite? 2. hate to see you being a dickhead then Jimmy: 1. Bollocks weren't you, you're saying go 'cause you're fed up which ain't polite when we've got a plan and if we weren't gonna stick to it I wouldn't have bothered to show up at 6 when we could've just pissed about during this punishment Jimmy: 2. yeah, you would Janis: That is not what I'm saying, I'm saying I'm having a shower, that's it Jimmy: if you'd cracked on instead of getting a mard on, you'd be done by now Janis: shut up Jimmy: you Janis: I'm serious Jimmy: me an' all Jimmy: stop pissing about Janis: I know how long she takes, you don't Jimmy: I don't care Janis: then I don't care how long I take in relation to you Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [obviously taking longer than you would have but nowhere near Grace levels of long 'cos just not that bitch, casually walking past him back to your room like let's get this done] Jimmy: [follows her again] Janis: [has got hair wet, suck it, got to pretend we had that steamy shower sesh we didn't have there] Jimmy: [is 😒] Janis: [likewise, we'll let the flat whites show as you're drying off said hair like 'good morning ladies'] Jimmy: [at least you can pretend you're 😒 to see them] Janis: [making some joke about morning coffee as you go over to him and hold his face, really like, get it together but fake loving upon him 'cos just so cute] Jimmy: [taking the excuse she's given you to kiss her because you've wanted to for an age] Janis: [enjoy, they're stunned silent rn anyway so take your chance kids] Jimmy: [we know that's why you're really 😒 Jimothy so it'll be an amazing kiss that Mia will just love to witness] Janis: [being so vocal in her disgust 'cos massive snitch and wants them to get caught again] Jimmy: [and not at all casually knocking on the bathroom door cos raging at Grace but she assumes it's Janis so she's like excuse you] Janis: [telling her where the nearest loo is, 'if you're that desperate, like' and smugly reclining on Grace's bunk so the rest of you have to stand around awkwardly in this room that is not big enough for all these people remotely] Jimmy: [Grace doing such an affectionate eye roll at JJ cos you know they being coupley af like she ships it so hard cos 1. she do 2. she doesn't fancy jimmy she's just not a dick to people who serve her coffee and 3. fuck you Mia] Janis: [just cuddling on this bed like y'all not even here and we're just having a moment] Jimmy: [whispering flatwhite shade that you can pretend is sweet nothings cos they'd be so annoyed they can't hear what you're saying] Janis: [giggiling in such an un-you way but it is funny, obvs] Jimmy: [Grace I'm calling you out for not knowing this is fake after hearing that except I'm not because you're not that invested and are just getting ready like a normal person] Jimmy: [shoutout to Jimmy for drawing yet more attention to these lovebites by touching and kissing them in a really soft way like oh I'm so sorry I've got no chill, I hope it doesn't hurt lol lol lol] Janis: [maybe that's how she be with boys, you don't know, let you off gal] Janis: [when you acting like oh my god, gotta hide them but in that LOOK kinda way] Jimmy: [I think Mia should be trying to get Ella or whoever to dob them in for Jimmy being there and Grace is just like chill so they're lowkey having a row in the bathroom] Janis: ['wanna go for breakfast?']

[mcribel]

( ella purnell + 18 + muse 05 ) isn’t that maribel sawyer over there? i heard SHE joined faction one after they got back to west ham. it’s funny, ‘cause they were only on the service trip to do something kind. hopefully they fit in there – they’re TENDERHEARTED, but also BIDDABLE. oh, i’m sure they’ll be fine. ( james, she/they, 20, EST )

hello it’s me again !! i have really bad uuuhhhh self control so i brought in this sweetie !!

TW: PAST EATING DISORDER (MENTIONS ONLY), MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES.

a e s t h e t i c s

handwritten letters and ink-stained hands, vintage magnifying glasses and worn oxfords, knee-high socks and scraped knees, ribbons in hair and turtlenecks underneath dresses, dried flowers and locked up diaries, suede skirts and oversized cardigans, hot tea and cold coffee, flinching at loud noises, loud voices, record scratches and stumbles, stuttering words and beet-red faces, bitten nails and awkward stances, blankets laid out in the sun and the smell of newspapers.

general info !!

full name: maribel ottoline sawyer

nickname(s): mari, bell, lottie b/c middle name, etc. etc. just sawyer sometimes idk

b.o.d. - june 1st, 18 yrs old

label(s): the marionette, the demure, the obsequious, the allegiant, etc.

height: like 5′3″

hometown: duluth, minnesota

sexuality: ??? ??? ?????

stats TBD but her pinterest is HERE !

biography !!

born the middle child to a man in the air force and a woman whose passions laid among writing diet cookbooks and recording cooking DVDs, maribel was never anything extraordinary.

after all, her elder sister had a voice made for broadway, and her younger brother was writing sonnets before he’d hit middle school. and maribel was just maribel, another girl with middle child syndrome

her household was typical, conservative all-american, strict no matter where they moved. curfew before 9pm and family dinner every sunday, mandatory; better not miss out on those vegetables or you’ll be sitting there for hours. grounded for grades below their expected. the usual.

there wasn’t anything particularly interesting in her life for the longest time. she was just another shy girl who moved to school to school, quiet and seated in the very back of class, as if that’d allow her the coverage to remain unseen.

she couldn’t color in the lines, or follow the lines, or draw a straight line, the kind of gal who opened her mouth at the wrong time, whose voice got washed away by another’s interrupting. she got picked on at most schools, due to her size and her stumbling words, and she’d let it happen for the most part. always the wannabe, trying to be who she wasn’t.

it hadn’t helped that her mother was some sort of ... health food guru, a woman obsessed with image and the epitome of health - her practices were often forced upon maribel, especially, beginning in a long, difficult relationship with food.

by the time she was a freshmen in high school, her parents had divorced and, for a brief moment, mari thought she could finally settle down somewhere and become a normal teenager. this was until, of course, her mother enrolled her in a boarding school in nevada.

with her sister graduated and her brother still in middle school, mari was left alone in a strange school; the only constant being the cliques that surrounded herself and the money they waved around, as if it were nothing.

the only time she was ever really approached was because of her knack with forgery, a talent picked up after hours of mimicking others’ handwriting, an attempt to change every single part of her into someone likable.

often stayed in the computer labs during lunch and free periods, firstly because she’d never been allowed to have a computer at home (rots yr brain!) and secondly because she’d gotten into programming, and it was something she could actually ... see herself doing, potentially.

was alone in this until her sophomore year, when the next new kid found their way into the computer lab; the loser zone, the land of outcasts. this individual, despite their quirks and oddities, became maribel’s first genuine friend. they were a little too into conspiracies and mysteries, but that was alright.

soon enough, it started to rub off onto maribel, as well, who’d always been observant but not the kind of gal to put it to use. they became a tiny pair of investigators, p.i.’s without the certification, investigating petty school drama that was usually written on the inside of a bathroom stall.

essentially a less impressive nancy drew / scooby doo gang / veronica mars duo.

surprisingly ! beginning junior year, maribel got involved with the weed and underaged drinking and whatnot b/c her like, very best friend was doing it and she wanted to be...impressive, i guess?

so then they became stoner detectives. about halfway thru their junior year is when things got uuhh ... complicated.

one night they were just, y’know, getting high and other typical teenager things. and then someone started talking about aliens, and then area 51, and then they both became increasingly aware that they were living in nevada and Not Too Far from the airbase.

long story short, they attempted to break into area 51. they got caught, got charged with trespassing and had to be bailed out of county jail, maribel’s dad almost lost his job, and her best friend disappeared without a trace almost immediately afterwards. spooky shit !

this is when her mother packed up and moved them to west ham, kansas ! it was for a ~fresh start~ but really was just a way to keep her eye on maribel.

i mean, god, for the rest of her junior year maribel was miserable. she was a student at west ham high but like ... god, she hardly spoke to anyone. drug tested every week, essentially on some sort of form of house arrest.

wasn’t really allowed to get a job during this either ! so she made money by anonymously creating and selling fake I.D.’s b/c like ... yolo, y’know? why not?

her mental health deteriorated during this and by the summer before her senior year she was getting help for an eating disorder. she was essentially gone the entire summer, but like ... doubt anybody noticed tbh !

by the time senior year rolled around, maribel was in a better place and was like ... determined not to fall into a bad headspace again. her anxiety’s still pretty strong but ! she’s trying !

uuh started working for the school newspaper as a help column under a fake name b/c ! this was her way of branching out and getting to know students w/o actually doing it lmao.

took a few of her classes online so she could leave school earlier, just b/c it was a major source of anxiety for her and like ... she couldn’t eat alone in the bathroom again. her mom was a little less ... restrictive, so maribel got a job.

or well ... she got a lot of jobs. maribel, being maribel, can hardly keep a job b/c she usually ends up fucking up real badly in an almost comical manner and getting fired.

on the otherhand, she had earned herself a partial scholarship and was debating over majoring in computer science or investigative journalism (her parents were very disapproving of her doing computer science, however, so she was likely to be forced into journalism) ... until the trip.

she went as a simple act of kindness, y’know, to give back to the community that she hardly knew.

and now here we are !! joining faction one b/c she knows of everybody there and they’re all her age and like ... she can’t be on her own or she’d actually die lmao so !

personality !!

god ... she’s awkward. like just, straight up awkward. she’s real bad at talking to others.

always tripping and stumbling over her words, and occasionally her own two feet. she’s constantly jittery and just like ... fidgety b/c she’s usually nervous. touch her hand. it’s shaking. why? she doesn’t know !

however maribel is like ... very very very nice. tries really hard to be kind to everybody and tries really hard 2 be a good pal to whoever makes their way into her life.

sorta kinda like ... adjusts her personality 2 match whoever she’s talking to b/c she wants to be likable. oh, you smoke marlboros? me too ! proceeds to cough a lung after inhaling one (1) cigarette. that sort of shit.

used to smoke a lot of weed but ! didn’t really do it that much in recent months. might increase now that her mom isn’t around but you never know. uuhh the rare times that she does drink it’s like ... a complete flip in her personality. becomes ms. extrovert, a flirt of flirts. but that’s very rare.

very hesitant with befriending people even tho she ! desperately wants friends ! she’s just a little untrusting ... a little worrisome ... believes she’s cursed to be a friendless loser for the rest of her life. so she’s definitely like .. a try hard too.

i mean like i don’t think ‘no’ is in her vocabulary ! she’ll do anything if u ask and like .. sound like u really want it. really just is seeking approval whenever possible.

squeaks like a mouse :/

rambles ! when she’s nervous ! and apologizes a lot.

she’s just like ... insecure and doesn’t expect anybody 2 remember her from anything jskdfg

easily bends to other’s will, easily manipulative / easy 2 step on / etc. etc.

she does smile and like ... laughs a lot tho ! b/c she tries rly hard to come off as like happy and optimistic and like ... not having deep-rooted issues with herself. 

she’s a good kid, just a lil plain jane. can’t talk for shit but has given good written advice b4. is good w/ math n numbers but not much anything else.

she is really observant !! doesn’t rly use it to her advantage tho :/ she just makes mental notes ... writes shit in her diary b/c she 100% keeps n writes in her diary daily. 

sort of lies abt herself too ! like it’s nothing serious but like ... she doesn’t rly want others to know how lame she is sdifkg

can be ... ditzy , lacking common sense, a little naive ... just wants everything to be okay :(

loves vintage stuff ! owns p much only vintage stuff ! also listens 2 like ... records exclusively like the dork she is. like soft indie pop and other shit.

has probably cried 2 mitski but like ... who hasn’t :/

literally only turned 18 like ... a few days ago ... she’s baby ...

wanted connections !!

god okay ... so like obv i would like some friends for her ... varying degrees of closeness.

idk somebody she has crushed on before / is crushing on currently .. but like, from afar, like she’d never talk to them but she can look !! and dream !! and write their names together in her diary

somebody use her b/c she’s so naive n like ... usable. idk what for but ! anything ! get her to steal shit ! get her to wreck shit or to lie for you or whatever !

like ... fake friends ... ppl who’ll throw her away once her purpose is done

alternately !! something pure n wholesome.

ALTERNATELY srsly though. wreck her shit. convince her you care for her n then betray her !!

conspiracy pals ... for the rare times she gets high ...

someone she flirted with once while drunk at like a party and now she’s embarrassed and avoids them :/

an ex-tutor b/c ... don’t think school’s in session anymore ...

ppl who genuinely want the best for her and like ... care for her as a living person.

someone who just cant stand ! that she’s so weak minded and malleable ! and rather than use her they just ... clash with her. cause arguments even tho maribel doesn’t rly... do that.

like someone just yell at her sdikfg

someone has to get her out of a sticky situation and they’re like ... Annoyed. might not wanna admit it but ! and she just feels bad

ppl who she’s definitely given a fake I.D. to

ppl who literally forgot she existed dkfmghg

someone for her to follow around like a lil puppy and sidekick !! b/c she doesn’t have a single independent thought !! someone she’s just rly trying to impress

someone found her diary and oh no ! it’s embarrassing !

c o r r u p t  h e r. idk how ! seduce her ! make her look at the world differently ! ruin her ! DESTROY HER !

literally ... anything ...pleathe ... i’ll give u a penny. 

[yaz-the-spaz]

Get to know me tag

Tagged by the lovely @ziamflowers thanks so much for the tag babe! :)

How tall are you? 5′0″

What color are your eyes? brown

Do you wear contacts and/or glasses? glasses (no contacts cause I'm very averse to things going in or anywhere near my eyes/eyeballs)

Do you wear braces? used to. thank god that's over. (*war flashbacks to high school*)

What is your fashion style? ideally if I had the money I would love to go full 80′s cause I just love that style and always have but alas I am poor so it's mostly just a mix of things that kind of emulate that style--like leggings or washed out jeans with oversized shirts/sweaters--with some contemporary stuff thrown in here and there (and when I'm feeling real lazy which is a big percentage of the time basically just jeans and a comfy t-shirt lol)

When were you born? ′93

How old are you? 24

Do you have any siblings? two brothers, two sisters

What school/college do you go to? used to go to umbc (university of maryland, baltimore county - it’s a mouthful but nobody ever knows what it is unless they’re from the md/baltimore area cause it’s not super well known so i usually end up just saying the whole thing all out loud which is annoying af) but i graduated almost three years ago now

What kind of student are you? was always a pretty good student tbh but just quiet (i.e. almost never wanted to raise my hand/speak in class unless I was fairly sure I had the right answer cause I was so scared of being wrong and the social embarrassment)

What are your favorite subjects? english and history all dayyyyy (and art when I had it but at the schools i went to it was usually only offered as an elective that wasn't available all the time)

What are your favorite movies? indecisive af and can’t choose a favorite anything so not answering this but at least a couple of them, if not more, would probably be something marvel

What are your favorite pastimes? reading and writing, watching shows and movies, hanging out on this godforsaken site

Do you have any regrets? my entire life lol jk but there’s honestly too many to list...not speaking up as much as I should/should have, giving up on things too quickly/easily, obsessing and overanalyzing every little thing people say or do to me/for me, talking too much, not talking enough, saying or doing something stupid, etc. etc. i have a lot of issues okay

What’s your dream job? anything that involves allowing me to work from home and make my own hours, preferably involving writing/editing and/or reading >>> also this will pretty much probs always be my answer to this question

Would you like to get married? yeah someday...sigh...but i’d need a relationship first and who knows if that’ll ever happen lol

Do you want kids? How many? yup. ideally 2 (maybe 3 max), i’ve always wanted twins (either two girls, or a girl and a boy though just my luck i’ll get two boys and have my hands full lmao) so putting that out there in the universe for good vibes

How many countries have you visited? u.s. of a (where i live), cuba, mexico, and the u.k.

What is your scariest dream? idk I don't remember most of my dreams but I also hardly ever have nightmares so my scariest one that i can think of atm is not that bad tbh but it had something to do with these funny looking giant toy robots, some were good and trying to help us stay safe and some were bad and were trying to destroy/burn our house and my mom was trapped upstairs where they were starting the fire so i was mostly scared for her cause I was worried she wouldn't be able to get out but she did (the good robots helped her) and it was all fine, rip our house tho lol

Do you have a significant other? lol see above

Put your playlist on shuffle and without skipping put the first 15 songs

(was gonna do this on itunes like i usually do but decided to do it on spotify instead since that would be more accurate as far as the songs i’ve listened to in the last few years since i barely even use itunes anymore lol but anyway here we go):

reflections - misterwives (i don’t even know this song or remember adding it lmao i be adding random songs and then just never listen to them again so there’s probs a few more like that on this list but oh well; i do kinda like the misterwives though they’re cool)

don’t go - kevin ross (such a good song!!!)

worst behavior - drake

we own the night - the wanted

deeper - ella eyre

words - daya

lonesome loser - little river band (idk this one either lol i musta been on a weird country/folk music kick or something idk? like what is this band name lol?)

paper hearts - tori kelly

watch me - stella (who even is this lmao - update: woops just remembered this is carlos santana’s daughter who i found out a few months back does neo-soul/r&b and i went and listened to her album and saved all the songs and then promptly forgot all about it lol smh)

reflection - fifth harmony

memories (part ii) - big sean, john legend

magnets - disclosure, lorde

heatstroke - calvin harris, young thug, pharrell williams, ariana grande (this is such a bop!!!!! i can’t believe i forgot all about this song!)

body moves - dnce

truffle butter - nicki minaj, drake, lil wayne

sorry if you’ve done this already or just don’t wanna, feel free to ignore, but tagging @ohthathurt @waxxbutterfliess @cutie-louis @noshowolfie @wlwharrie @please-dont-freak-out @mcgenjiskid @peachesannndgravy