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Planning something. Maybe
#Ive got this half finished fic where Hiccup and toothless never got found out and spent years training in secret and Im. thinking ideas.#I took a nap from 10pm to 12 and that's been my good night's sleep so far. It is nearly 8am. Hm.#maybe bed. maybe#there's an egg on my table. like. a raw egg. im looking at you ImDeadTired#hiccup horrendous haddock iii#hiccup#toothless#if you skint. but Ive got to market the audience(? what audience?#httyd#how to train your dragon#enviromental drawing#sort of#this isnt even a study this is just vibes#how to train your dragon hiccup#hiccup haddock#grayscale
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Trying new styles with queen bee
#miraculous ladybug#my art#fanart#ladybug and chat noir#ml ladybug#redesign#chloe bourgeois#queen bee ml#the ponytail is different every time#instead of venom#(which I do still like)#I think her main power would be some sort of mind control akin to hawkmoth#BUT where HM (in my hc) is immobile while controlling a single person#queen bee calls out to her ‘subjects’ while they enter a trance like state#maybe in the past they had loyal followers that would offer themselves up in the pursuit of good#idk I’m still thinking about her but I’m tired
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Sparkstember Day 18: Balls (Bullet Train)
Sometimes (oftentimes) it's true that all you need are Balls. I personally absolutely love Balls. I'm a big fan! Ekhem. Today I'm using the help of (I mean, copying most of the passages from it) my earlier Balls rant that I have written down after my first listen of it back in January. I really love this album and I don't want to completely skip over saying a couple words on it at least but I really don't think I have the headspace to write anything very good for it today. I'll still try though!
So yeah, Balls. It's a great album, fun and chill (in my sense of what I call and consider chill anyway), consistent, as Sparks albums tend to be, and as I suspected / hoped it does fit this specific vibe of driving around at night somewhere city-like and illuminated. Or being on a train deep at night and looking at the world zooming by (if you'd even see much of it on a train at night anyway.....). And I do think that it's not so dissimilar to Gratsax (I'd say now that it's definitely darker and moodier than its predecessor...). So it's interesting to think about how it's considered to be one of the "weak" ones (by music reviewers at least) while Gratsax is so beloved in comparision.
I will admit, I don't really know what the big problem with this album could be. As I said, it's fun, it has the melodies, it has the energy, it has the theatricality (I like seeing how more and more orchestral instruments such as strings are being incorporated into the music, in a way the jump into Lil' Beethoven two years later doesn't come of as THAT much of a shock because of this. The evolution of sound here is fascinating!) I really like the intense beats, just as much as the more laid-back and moodier pieces. And there's lots of gold to be found in the lyrics department as always.
One more thing I wanna say is that at some point I wondered if this music sounds older than it is. Maybe it does? But then I remembered that this was 2000 and honestly when I think about it, there just IS something about this album that fits so well with the Y2K image and vibe and all. Sparks 2000 and all that.
Favourite songs (and other highlights):
Balls: I mean. It's Balls.
Scheherazade: absolutely LOVE this one and I had the strangest impression of it sounding very familiar when I first heard it. Months later I found out that it was just briefly featured in TSB so I think that explains it (I will talk more about my TSB viewings on TSB day. EVERYTHING has to be explained in excruciating detail, lmao)
The Calm Before The Storm: bugsonas 4ever. Song itself is amazing too
How To Get Your Ass Kicked: how can a song about getting your ass kicked be so pleasant and relaxing, it always keeps cracking me up, how perfect that is actually
Bullet Train: I love it how introducing the topic of the song with a "It's the [topic of the song]" is a reoccurring theme on this album. Thank you Sparks for this ode to technology and art (these lyrics always have me giggling). And also it just goes hard as heck
It's Educational: a perfect fusion of / sequel to I Thought I Told You To Wait In The Car and Progress (it's mostly the vocal delivery that reminds me of the latter)
The Angels: such an odd one here but I still like it a lot, I apparently said that it sounds "surprisingly mainstream for Sparks but somehow in a positive way". It's very sweet and I absolutely love how Russell sings here, it's so different from what we're used to but that only makes it hit you even more in the feels, lol. And I actually prefer the alternative version of this song that's featured as a bonus track, and I do think that's in big part because you can hear Russell better on it (or that was my first impression of it at least and it kind of stuck)
#balls dayyyyyyy#how weird that i went with a different drawing idea than the bugsonas considering that i'm such a big fan of them#(maybe the bugsonas COULD appear later. still don't have an idea for the final day so hm. thinking about this)#but yeah i couldn't pass up the opportunity to draw russell in this era of glasses & haircut combination#and i love sparks' tour photos too much to not give them some sort of tribute at least once#and honestly! i think this is my favourite drawing so far. might even beat out noisy boys#it turned out better than the vision i had of it in my mind!!! that NEVER happens. yet it did this time#(yet also i'm adding this to the series of me making my life harder for myself that it needs to be#because i insisted that the text has to be handwritten for WHATEVER reason. looks good tho so that's a win)#but also man. lil beethoven day tomorrow#i feel so sick about all three of the upcoming albums still and it brings me close to having an existential crisis#to think about how it's been almost a year already since i first heard LB. that's just soooo wrongggggg#i've already been thinking pretty hard abt these albums over the past couple of days (just like every day before that too tbh)#truly nothing else like them in this world. tune in tomorrow to see the madness unfold!!!#sparkstember 2024#my art#goose monologues
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Also... Post-canon lovesong... If you even care... "Is Sparrow still with Rebecca?" that part is a choose your own adventure babeeey~
#Posts for like 3 friends maybe#but sure I'll tag it#dndads#lovesong#See regarding Sparrow and Rebecca...#Hm. I've always had mixed/complicated feelings there.#Like I think the love was there (I do ship it I do) but maybe this wasn't meant to be a forever thing#Or in another lifetime it could have been#Or they just needed some change of sorts!#Like heh. You know. Opening up the relationship.#Specifically to let a certain wet cat inside#In the divorce scenario though well I like that for Sparrow period cause I just want to see him choose himself for once?#And. Controversially. I rather like Rebecca and Lark together haha I think they're quite cute frankly.#But open relationship and/or polycule is nice to think about too-#They're both poly but haven't figured it out yet your honor. ESPECIALLY Rebecca.#Or at the very least they would thrive in *some* kind of queer relationship structure your honor#this is my truth ok#sparrow oak garcia#nick foster#nicky freeman#rebecca swallows oak garcia#And I will keep the not so safe for work tags tooo myself
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just thought abt catching an attitude and being petty w/ shinso.....................................
#SHINSO#I MISS HM#inspired by what i just reblobbed on my main but also the og is the reddit post which i LOVE#anyway u get in a fight and he texts u abt something trying to act like everything is over but you're still wrong#u respond 'bark like a dog' HOOOOOOO MY GOD#he goes. baanandas.#actually tbh i need to sort this out and maybe write it because#MANNJJDKAHDJKLHFAJSKDHFA#I CAN HARDLY THINK#GEN#SHII POSTS
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dsaf's narrator will always be so mysterious like What the Fuck was up with dee hearing them that one time
#i have many Many rambles about the narrator#within my brain#but they are very long#maybe i will write them down someday. but they're Very Interesting#like right now the closest i can think to what they could be is probably Just Some Guy with the Narrator Job#or maybe even like...some sort of tulpa similar to how fredbear is??? but i doubt that's the case#i think the idea of blackjack being the narrator would be Very Good. heck i think even maybe blackjack *should* have been the narrator#BUT . that is definitely not the case. and there's too much evidence that it's not to even be headcanon for me :( even though it is a very#fun idea#ANYWAY. i'll stop now before i end up typing the whole thing out in just the tags bc that's a waste#dee being able to hear the narrator in this One Instance is just very. Hm!#dsaf#dayshift at freddy’s#narrator
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hmmm should i go through all of the dramas and musicals and other dn medias to compare light's wardrobes there as well as from the anime and manga or is that too much work
#i need to see all of light's wardrobe and i was considering doing every character but i think i'll limit it to light and misa#and potentially mello bc he's constantly serving cunt. i dont think L and near have enough outfits to bother w it and the rest#of the kira taskforce wears pretty basic suits the whole time so i will probably not do them#def light and misa though i care abt their taste in fashion the most#i was planning on doing another read through of the manga and marking things down while i'm doing that and just putting the#anime on like 10x speed and pausing for new outfits but if im gonna do extra content that'll probably push this project into being#a longer thing bc originally i was thinking it'd take me maybe a week or two but i've never seen the dramas yet so im probs gonna#want to take my time w those. hm. idk i like have life things to do but i kinda really want to do this#i also want to keep track of the page numbers/timestamps/episodes that certain outfits show up for reasons#and then ig once i have all of my data (light and misa's outfits) i can set up individual timelines for each series and i can sort#them into little categories and i can compare them and i can track their fashion tastes over time yippee!!!!#oh i get so excited thinking abt this i will have the best archive of all of their outfits and i will ofc share my findings bc i feel like#this is very helpful research#it's so funny bc all of this.... is just so i can properly pick out lingerie that i think light would like.......#ajdhkajsjhdjgasjhj
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fuck architecture and Euclidean space
#*stumbles out of the drawing program covered in blood*#Did I have to design a house for this fic no. But if I didn’t we’d have the problem of all doors lead to the kitchen#which while funny is the sort of fictional physics abuse I cannot abide. So now the house for Marnie au has a ref sheet#my fic#me: hm maybe I can fuck around in real estate websites and find a fitting house#also me: yes and this room and THAT room and THIS room and STAIRS. PUBLISH chapter#wrote myself into a corner (literally. lmao)
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lorelais weird beef with jess in s2 is like. u are a grown woman. moreover the weird bit where she kinda sorta prioritizes her daughter's whiny bf over her actual daughter is. u are a grown woman and that is a teenage manchild.
#watching s2 ep19 rn which is like. lorelai 'i can't lie to dean why are you asking me to lie to dean' its like.. i know everyone and their#mother on this website says it that deans clinginess and anger borders on emotional abuse and lorelai encourages it? sort of? and its so#annoying. especially in this episode where its like so insane that rory doesn't say something about it. then again i guess it doesn't go#in line with the writers' dean most perfect bf alive shtick. but if u want him to be perfect then write him better and less annoying?#also lorelais hatred hatred of a 17yo kid is sooo strange when they have her as this totally understanding empathetic adult and she suddenl#can't empathize with the kid who is arguably the most like her and maybe needs it the most. so ooc. and annoying.#PLUS most especially her freak out at luke after the car accident is sooo#batshit insane yelling at luke that he has an obligation to rory and her over his nephew its like. hm. are u fr. also acting like a hairlin#fracture is the most terrible thing to ever happen ever!!! get a grip its so annoying how she goes on and on about it like its catastrophic#i get the overreacting mother bit. obviously. but this is still so stupid insane.#i love lorelai but this ep is her worst maybe. on par with the s7 arc#and speaking of christopher hayden is sooo smarmy and disgusting acting like superdad for one and a half episode before he fucks off to be#a dickhead again. so annoying that my most beloved episode ever is so annoying in its last 10 minutes
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Went skimming thru late trimax For Reasons, got caught up reading the Legato fight, realized things about the fight that I never had before & went WOW, I kind of want to write an analysis post right now!
Felt the same kind of insanity grip me, however momentarily, that fueled all my analysis posts however many months ago. Too tired to actually word things coherently right now, but...
I May or may not have a full(ish?) analysis of the Legato & Vash fight a la style of This post analyzing the Trigun: Multiple Bullets fight that got unexpectedly kind of popular. People seemed to really appreciate that one, & I even had some ppl saying it could be cool if I did that for others?
So. Legato fight. Maybe. Feel free to remind me later if u see no mention of it again for over a week lol
#speculation nation#ive been wanting to go back into reading the manga again#ive only slowly (VERY slowly) been puttering along with where i am in my fic#for research purposes with the fic.#i do want to go back through the manga bc i STILL havent done a full reread of it#ive just reread so many different parts of it for assorted research that im probably getting to some 10 or so reads total lmao#i wanna reread it in full tho front to back to sort out any stray details and remember any timeline things i might have slightly skewed.#the problem with reading the manga though. is that every fucking time i look at it. i am consumed by a drive to research EVERY little thing#so me reading turns into 'hm thats interesting. that reminds me of this thing that i know happens in volume 8. let me just check that now--'#and i end up so dreadfully distracted every damn time. bc i end up with all my wires crossed and my attention pointing a million ways#it's exhausting. and so i havent been reading the manga outside of random research dives.#im very good at that. i know every volume of the manga and can find Anything within 1 or 2 mins (at the Most)#which is also kind of the problem lol. fingers in too many pies. so many things to think about.#if i get back into Actually rereading the manga tho you can bet ur ASS ill find more things to make posts about#every time i open up the manga i find new things that i could analyze.#i just havent. bc i dont have time. but. ykno what. maybe i Could get back into it...#remind me later. this is one of my favorite fucking fights with my favorite Fucking panels#and i realized smth about the shit Vash is doing that was making me lose my MINDDDD#later tho. ive been sleep deprived today. and it is time for me to rest.#& yea yea ITNL is still the main focus. but idk i have such a mind for details and i remember So many things about the manga#i wanna show that off to people again. and thus. Analyses!!! :D#later. goodnight for now
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where im taking the doctor for a date tbh
#yea we're doing all three in a day no thats not insane thats being honest about the speed at which they live their life#you know that thing about how the speed of your heart determines how fast you experience time?#like mice experience time faster than us and also live shorter?#bc their hearts beat faster than ours?#dont know if thats true but i read it once i think#you know how the doctors hearts sound like. super hyper fast?#anyway i want to spend a day hearing the most bonkers corrections of museum cards and watching them get in fights with museum people#'listen ''mr expert'' i killed the last dodo (turns to me. 'accidentally!' turns back) i Think i'd know what they look like dont you'#'really wasnt my fault. was a little bit my fault. 53 birds one timey wimey detector sort of a situation. shouldnt have brought it honestly#'but you dont step out of your tardis going:#'hm maybe i shouldnt bring my machine that boils eggs at 30 paces in case i run into the last 53 dodos''#'i mean the 17th century wasnt even on the agenda! i was in the 32nd century! two galaxies over! and then suddenly: mauritius'#'dont know what happened'#'well'#'53 exploded dodos. happened.'#'my sincerest apologies'#and i'll go 'lunch?'#or kissing with tongue behind a dinosaur skeleton whichever
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I will never forgive the English translation of the full "stay awhile you are so fair" quote because that is not the same meaning as in the original English and maybe I am wrong and maybe my English is not good enough for that or I'm interpreting this wrong but there is a difference between "bearing something", accepting your fate in a defeated way, even if you do not want to (idk bearing has a pretty negative connotation to be because it's more.... suffering adjacent? I suppose? To me at least) and accepting it in a way that reads like "if it comes to this then I am already beyond saving and I will gladly accept my impending ruin because I brought this upon myself and with that I will live" in German he uses the word "gerne" that means you accept something in a positive way and that you're fine with something and you have no problems with it and that got lost in the English interpretation and I know poetry is different and difficult because of metrics and wordflow and the having it sound right while not losing the intended meaning but it's such a shame to me because the people who don't know the original German can't go insane over Sanctuary the same way I do and that is just such a pity.
#german Faust is fine with it he fully accepts it and embraces it and it's a declaration of sorts#it's more enthusiastic it's more passionate it's more...idk it just lets the english translation seem like a little bit of a let down#english Faust makes a statement. it is what it is and while i might not like it i will bear ir nonetheless because this is my fault#and don't even get me started on not understanding the Japanese translation like. i can't even interpret that as maybe intended#i mean in the end it ends in the dame way but you can see by the way the english is already different in meaning the jaoanese might be too#and i doubt akira knows german#so there are subtleties there i can not understand and i an so angry about it i just know my way to interpret the quote and d that#it is different from other people interpreting the quote because if linguistic differences and :(#it's the same quote it's the same cobtext BUT YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THE SUBTLE UNDERTONES AND I CAN'T#:(#:'(#shame shame shame#but such is the fate of someonr who doesn't speak all languages fluently#sobsob#wataei#<- this /is/ kinda about them technically so...maybe I'll put it in?#should i?#hm#I'll leave it in maybe I'll take it out again later we'll see
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Sometimes I'm like. OK so I'm a decent to good fic writer. But like. Am I a good *writer*? Do I have what it takes to even consider taking writing even semi-seriously (and do I even want to)? But I do want to. I've always wanted to. But I need to know if I'm good enough. But I won't know if I'm good enough until I try and show it to an unbiased audience. Idk idk idk.
#like i think maybe i am...quite good. at some things anyway#but idk if it can ever be enough to actually. do anything with it#much less make any sort of career out of it.#idk i have some (non-fic) short story ideas im excited about so. maybe I'll give them a go in a few months#i think short stories are the way honestly like yeah i *can* write long form stuff but obvs the quality isn't great#and then editing feels overrrrwhelmiiing#but i have some short story collection ideas so. hm. we'll see.
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2023 reads // twitter thread
Reader, I Murdered Him
spinoff of jane eyre, following Adele, the young french girl she’s a governess for
she retells the story of her young life, from when she’s adopted to her life in boarding school in in London where she witnesses other young women being hurt and assaulted by abusive men, and becomes a vigilante to try and protect them
bi MC, f/f
#Reader I Murdered Him#Betsy Cornwell#aroaessidhe 2023 reads#hm mixed feelings!#the blurb calls it a thriller which. i wouldn’t call it that#quite slow to start#and only does like. one murder and threatens some dudes. she becomes a thief rather than like fully vigilante#i think it could have committed more fully in certain directions#and also the bit at the end..while it was definitely implied he was creepy; that kind of all came out at once & conveniently ended the stor#the sapphic romance subplot was nice though! and the friendships!#I’m not super familiar with jane eyre and I think this relies on you knowing it to fill in some gaps at the start at least.#but also if you’re fond of the romance in that you probably won’t like this lol#the author’s note is interesting and talking about how the women other than jane in the original are just sort of irrelevant plot devices#so like. maybe read if you DON’T like JE; or if you like it but are more into the characters/themes than the romance#idk haha
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Orion Pax is naive, he’s just not naive the way ppl seem to think he is
#its more like. lacking in experience outside of a certain setting#he’s naive because he hasnt interacted with a larger section of the world. with ppl who have all sorts of struggles and problems#but ppl sometimes write him as an uwu baby who will be taken advantage of if his few friends dont keep an eye on him#i personally prefer the idea that bc so much of his life has revolved around being an archivist and also being aware#that something is Very Wrong with his world#that he approaches everything with a sense of caution and care that other ppl dont take. he’s suspicious at the same time he’s gracious and#polite#actually i saw somebody say once that he’d be reserved bc of how he came to be at the archives#alpha trion plucking him out of the wilds and dropping him a secure enough middle class job#his fellows would be suspicious of him. he would be used to ppl being wary of him#and maybe that could be part of him getting along so well with megatron in those early days#orion isnt dangerous or weird to megatron. he’s just some nerd who’s good at arguing with him#i think orion would come out of his carefully crafted carefully neutral shell and become a lot more animated#he’s still a but clueless like that scene about wanting to go to an amusement park of all things#but he’s not a stupid uwu baby that big rough megatron is going to ravish at the first chance possible#hm that got longer than i meant#id make it a proper post but. im shy#anyway this is abt tfp orion if it wasnt evident#babble.tag
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just had the experience of succesfully sounding out แว่นกันแดด in my head, recognizing those sounds ("waen kan daet") as something i'd seen in transliterated script, confidently going "zonnebril!", and then seeing it translated as sunglasses and going wait?? that was wrong?? for a whole two seconds before remembering that no, those words actually do all fit into the same mold, i was just pouring a different language into it by accident
#i made a pancakes-for-dinner sort of sunglasses when they should have been pancakes-for-breakfast sunglasses#is there a paper somewhere on third or fourth language acquisition through a second language? i bet there is. there should be#anyway. there is this (anecdotal? but i assume widely shared) phenomenon i've been thinking about a lot#in which a person hears (or says or thinks) some words. two seconds pass. they can't remember what language the words were in#you remember the content just fine! but the way it got to your brain? who knows#happened to my mother recently when we watched a dutch movie and afterwards she recalled it as 90 minutes of english#because there was a gun in it. which felt american to her#happened to ME recently too in fact. when i had to think hard after being told the boy and the heron had english subtitles in our theater#as we were walking out of the theater!! and the only way i got to a place of going hey yeah! was by remembering a moment#while watching the movie. of consciously going 'huh they chose to translate some of this japanese as 'ain't'. interesting'#and ain't ain't dutch!! definitive proof they DID show that japanese movie with english subtitles in our dutch theater!!#this wall of tags isn't (ain't) going anywhere except. i think the zonnebril confusion is a version of this happening but maybe. like.#with a faint zonnebril echo still in my brain. sunglasses sounds different but for a moment there i didn't realize that's not because#it's a different concept. but because i had pulled the wrong language string attached to this one concept. or something#*#you know what sometimes i kid myself into thinking i don't think about language much more than the average person#but then i look at myself and my half-remembered linguistics degree and every hobby i've ever had and i go hm. hmmmm
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