#i'm going to say nancy writes some poetic filth to robin

[shares-a-vest]

Eddie gives Steve the most obscene Valentine's Day cards. Nothing homemade, just an unassuming store-bought card that's all pink with a cheesy, 'I choo-choo choose you'-type train pun or whatever. But in it contains absolute filth written in Eddie's cramped handwriting.

What he likes doing to Steve. What he wants to whisper in Steve's ear while he does said things. What he likes Steve doing to him. Vivid descriptions of his body. Vivid descriptions of everything, really. What he's going to do to Steve before the day is out...

The first time Steve receives such a card is their first Valentine's together in 1987. He's at work, drudging through a day shift with Robin when he feels something crinkle in his back pocket as he slumps onto the wheely chair behind the counter. He furrows his brow and shuffles around to retrieve it, smirking when he sees Eddie's handwriting on the envelope.

'Steve' with a little heart next to his name.

"What is that?" Robin asks, looking up from the magazine she is sharing with Nancy, who's decided to pop in and out throughout the day as part of their romantic plans.

If you can call hanging out in a dead Family Video and stacking returns 'romantic'.

"Looks to be a card from my secret admirer," Steve replies with a shit-eating grin, as he waves around the envelope.

He pointedly chooses not to acknowledge Robin's eye roll.

He ungracefully tears the envelope as he opens it and giggles at the greeting card. It features two cartoon pears on the front, hugging and smiling against a pink background with the words, 'Quite the pearing' floating above them.

It's so goddamn silly. But he loves it.

Steve opens the card and is bombarded with Eddie's writing, scrawled all over the inside. The black pen and uneven handwriting look positively chaotic against the pink background as it slopes and narrowly misses the inside 'Happy Valentine's Day' message.

He gasps and drops the card, bringing a hand to his mouth after catching the word, "suck".

His idiot boyfriend has given him a dirty Valentine's card.

Nancy snorts a laugh and turns a page of her magazine, ignoring him while Robin makes a face.

"What does it say?" she asks, beaming as she hops off the counter, grateful for a distraction.

She reaches down and scoops up the card before Steve can reboot and take any action to stop her.

She stands, opening the card.

And poor, sweet Robin reads a line about Steve's ahem... appendage, before she can stop herself.

"OH MY GOD!" she shrieks, throwing the card immediately as she screws her eyes shut and shakes her head, her hair flying and frizzing as she waves her arms across her face. "Nope! No, no, no!"

Steve watches, frozen on the spot as the card falls to the ground, again. This time open.

Nancy leans over the countertop and squints.

"Oh," she says low, blushing as she makes out a sentence describing Steve and Eddie's bedroom activities.

Steve finally manages to do something. Which is to dive to the floor and scramble on his hands and knees for the card and its envelope. He jumps to his feet, holding Eddie's card to his chest, fearing the entire universe has now read it.

"I'm going to the back room," he splutters. "I should... Probably read it properly."

"EW!" Robin screams as he rushes to the storeroom door and slams it shut as Nancy rounds the counter.

"Do you think I can call Keith and say I have to go home to gauge my eyeballs out," Robin asks, talking a mile a minute as she reaches for Nancy's embrace.

"Robbie, calm down," she chuckles, hugging her tight. "It was... A lot. But we'll be fine. The most important thing is Eddie really likes Steve."

"I'm going to say he likes him too much!" Robin laments with an overly dramatic dry sob.

Nancy stifles a hearty laugh as she rubs Robin's back and thinks about what she should write on her own card to her girlfriend in readiness for their dinner date.

Although, she'll clean it up significantly. Maybe.

Later, Steve practically kicks the trailer door down, flustered.

"Oh, goody. You found my card," Eddie grins, hopping up from the couch with an unfairly chipper pep in his step considering the chaos he has caused.

"Yeah," Steve mumbles, nodding matter-of-factly.

Eddie steps forward, his wicked dimples on full display as he snakes an arm around Steve and shoves a hand in his back pocket.

He leans in to whisper in his ear.

"Slipped it in your back pocket before you went to work, sweetheart."

"Fuck," Steve huffs, running a hand through his hair.

Ronance continuation HERE