#i'm still crying over this ajkhfds it's so cute

[byanyan]

@lee-sol sent:ㅤgraduation season is upon them, and naturally, as one normal teenager would, he’s got a lot on his mind. and whenever he has a lot on his mind, he tends to avoid it, by focusing on other important tasks, anything he can do to keep himself from thinking. conveniently(?), he still has tons of homework to finish, thanks to the teachers cold enough to give homework towards the end of the year. for the most part, distracting himself is working, but something’s still at the forefront of his mind. he has a feeling that it won’t leave his mind until he addresses what’s on his mind, and this seems like the perfect time to bring it up, when his attention is on something else, rather than on them entirely. he anxiously taps his pencil against his the desk, trying to find the right words to say. and after drawing so many blanks, the words finally just slip out of his mouth. better to get it over with, rather than think about it much longer. “ i’m moving out of here soon, i started looking at apartments a few weeks ago. ” it seems like really important information to keep from them, but he hadn’t known how to bring it up until now. “ before you uh— jump to any conclusions, the ones i’ve been looking at are still in the area, just near the local college, so i wouldn’t be moving too far away. i’d feel weird not having my sisters nearby. ” there’s a reason they’re not included in the list, he’s just beating around the bush, overtaken by a sudden wave of nervousness. “ and i was wondering… if you’d like to move in with me? i’ve been setting aside funds from the odd jobs i worked as a kid, when i had extra cash leftover from paying for all the necessities, and i get paid really well at work, from what my boss pays me, and from the tips i get, so i’m not too worried about rent. ” there’s a pause, he has to take a deep breath to keep his nerves at bay. “ and uh— you’re almost always here, anyways. so, i feel like our relationship is at that level where moving in together just feels… right. ” the tapping of his pencil finally comes to a halt, that initial nervousness is gone, and some weight has been lifted off his chest, but he knows there’s still more to say. “ i don’t expect you to have an answer right away, i’ve just— been figuring out how to ask you for awhile now, and since graduation’s coming up soon, now seems like the right time to ask. ”

ㅤpen scratches across lined paper in quick yet idle strokes, though rather than words being formed by the ink left behind, it's a doodle. having long ago lost interest in the homework they're supposed to be finishing, they've taken instead to drawing a cute, rather angular cat with a mischievous look in its eyes. enveloped in their own little world as they are, byan takes no notice of the anxious tapping of sol's pencil until he speaks, breaking the otherwise quiet atmosphere of the room.

blinking in surprise at the words which come from seemingly nowhere, their sketching ceases. attention shifting over to where their boyfriend sits, still staring down at his own school work, they finally take notice of the way his pencil bounces off the desk's surface. he's nervous. this isn't unfamiliar, it's the way he's approached a lot of big, often important conversations in the past — he has an easier time talking about things if he can half-focus on something else, if he doesn't have to look them in the eyes or watch their reaction to what he says. it's not something that's ever bothered them, but they can't help but wonder why him moving out of his family's home is one of these kinds of conversation.

fortunately, before their mind can jump to any conclusions like 'oh god, he's moving to another city' or 'he's breaking up with me, isn't he,' sol stops that train of thought in its tracks. relieved when they're assured that he's not going far, byan releases the breath they hadn't realized they've been holding.

ㅤㅤ—and then he keeps talking.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ'i was wondering… if you’d like to move in with me?'

it's a question they're not expecting. one they're not prepared for. it catches them by surprise, catches them utterly off guard, so much so that they almost don't hear anything else that comes after it. ...move in with him? he... wants to live with them? while it's true that they're already here most of the time, having practically invited themself to live in his room, there's something very different about being asked if they'd move in with him. about being asked to join him in a place that would be both of theirs, and no one else's. it's... not the sort of thing they've ever thought someone would suggest to them. not the sort of thing they've ever thought someone could possibly want to do with them, of all people.

the funny thing is... housing is something they've been trying to figure out for the last few weeks, too. with graduation approaching so quickly, and their eighteenth birthday following it at the end of june, they've been reminded more and more insistently that they'll be out of the group home after that, whether they find somewhere to live or not. it's not something they've shared with sol, not wanting to worry him or have him ask his family if it's okay for them to stay here out of pity, or anything like that. they've always been able to figure things out on their own, to make things work without anyone's help, and this wouldn't be any different. thus far, however, the only options they've managed to work out are applying for a dorm at the college, which for all they know it might already be too late for, or moving the last of their things out of the group home to join the rest of their belongings here and at lena's while they continue to crash on couches and in sol's bed.

this question, though... it kind of changes everything. and sol doesn't even realize it.

ㅤㅤ" ...okay. "

sol's only barely finished speaking, explaining that they don't need to answer right away, and the response escapes past their lips before they can stop it, preventing them from thinking about it too much. keeping them from saying no due to their own stubborn pride, over not wanting to become too dependent on him and have him spending all his savings on them. he's moving into his own place regardless of whether they go with him, right? he'd be spending the money whether they're there or not. there's no reason to let their pride get in the way. moving in with sol, living with him for real... coming home to him every night, waking up next to him every morning in a place they can both call their own... they want that. it actually surprises them how much they want it.

ㅤthey agree; the more they think about it, moving in together... it does feel right.

ㅤㅤ" okay. yeah, "ㅤthey continue a moment later with a nod, their voice sounding more sure this time, albeit perhaps a bit more casual than it should when it comes to such a significant step forward in their relationship. gaze dropping back to their notebook, to the sketch marking the corner of the page, byan pulls their lip ring between their teeth, the only real sign of their own nerves. doing so also helps them to bite back the smile that twitches at the corners of their mouth, threatening to spread wide across their lips.

ㅤㅤ" let's do it. i'd... yeah. i'd like that. "