i don't really wanna be here anymore??? i'm not in like active danger dw but i just don't really have a will to be here. i'll never be good enough, i'm not enough. i don't really want to get older. i don't really have anybody in my life. or i guess more so people that i could go to so i don't feel alone. i have a couple close people, but i don't really ever talk to them much. i'm sure they would miss me, but i don't think about it much bc i'm not like actively wanting to do anything you know. i just feel way too empty to even feel alive anymore. i'm empty but overwhelmingly emotional and full at the same time
idk maybe i don't wanna die, i just wanna leave everything behind and move countries and restart my life. maybe in that life i'll be good enough and even happy? or dying. either one is fine with me i guess
dance is kind of the only thing i have left it feels like. and i mean dancing until i'm physically exhausted because it's the only way to give my mind a break and get my emotions out and exhaust myself is a... good even if not healthiest coping mechanism
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