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adhdsleepdeprivedstudent · 2 months

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holy fuck it’s been a minute since i posted!

almost 1600 days as a matter of fact aka almost 4 and a half years. my last post was early december of 2019, so like 3 months before life as we knew it ended.

tldr at the end!

this blog was largely based around the adhd experience in school, so some school updates!

i was a senior in 2020 so i “graduated” that may and my entire first year and a half of college was 100% online so that was certainly…interesting. second semester of sophomore year they reintroduced a couple of in person classes, mainly ones where zoom was impractical to use, such as my ASL classes. so i was one of the first students back on campus and that was cool but also horrible and extremely stressful and difficult to navigate. i was already struggling with my grades but that just made it worse. i started failing classes left and right, and basically failed my entire junior year first semester. second semester junior year i had just completely given up but was still taking classes to please other people, i enjoyed the actual learning between my two degrees but i just couldn’t keep up with school and everything else in my life. and then this last fall i had signed up for classes two weeks into the semester bc i was originally planning to take the semester off so i was extremely behind….and then two weeks after that i found out i had to move to a different state and ended up having to drop my classes anyways.

that break really forced me to slow down not just in school but all aspects of life. i got “settled” about halfway through october just to have to spend about 50-60% of the next 5 months traveling to and from home and my new state for many reasons. as it stands currently, unless i wish to pay out of state tuition i have to wait until about february or march of 2025 before i can get enrolled in a local university.

HOWEVER, i have decided and am actively looking into EMT schools for the summer and am currently looking for a second job in order to save up for that and im extremely excited about it! ill finish those degrees later lmao.

now, for the not school related life update that will show yall just why i was gone!

as many of yall may know i was diagnosed with adhd at 16, so in 2018, and had just been figuring a bit of it out when i started this blog. i was working and going to school and dealing with a lot at home but it was manageable for awhile. junior year was stressful and then i got extremely sick right around when i stopped posting so i had ended up taking some time off from content in order to focus on that. then covid hit and my life completely crumbled. i was already in online school so i didn’t have to slow down or wait for my school to figure stuff out and was able to finish business as usual. i was living at the time, with my grandparents, mom, sisters, and brother in one house, so it was always chaotic but being stuck in the house became a nightmare. lots and lots of family drama came from that and we were all stuck there because of how at risk both my grandparents and mom were.

the summer rolls around and i end up finally able to leave the house and get another job. it was a shit job but it got me out of the house so that was worth it. my “best friend” and i had been searching for apartments together so id needed to save money and was actively buying things and scheduling tours until she told me with less than a weeks notice that she was moving states and shortly after that basically quit acknowledging my existence. between family stuff, struggling with the start of college online, and then that i was not doing well mentally. i was lucky enough to have a couple friends that saw this and made sure to constantly keep checking on me and getting me out of the house more and more.

and then we moved. my mom, sisters and i started looking for a new place to live winter of 2020. my health had also taken a serious toll. i couldn’t even sit up in bed without feeling dizzy and was fainting regularly and had to quit my job because it got so bad. january 6th i got a call from my dr to go to the er immediately after she got some lab results back (i watched the capitol riot live on tv in the waiting room!) and was hospitalized for a few days after that. i got released and that next day we toured a house and it ended up being the one we bought.

within a month we were moving into the new house, school was kicking my ass, and i was still struggling physically and it had taken an even bigger toll on my mental health.

at the end of my freshman year i got a puppy and he and my friend genuinely saved my life. that summer, our family dog passed extremely unexpectedly and i had to pay all the vet bills for that and it really damaged my finances. my brother moved in and my life got worse again. and then we rescued a 3 week old kitten and couple months later i started another job. and then quit that job because my health was declining once again.

spring of the next year my sister and i got a job at the same place, and life seemed to start to steady minus my failing every class i took and my mental and physical health continuing to decline.

by fall of that year, after a lot of struggling throughout the family and a lot of other issues, we collectively agreed we had no choice but to send my brother rehab. he went, got out, immediately relapsed and we decided he had to go live with his biological father. i was thrilled because my brother genuinely abused me and then i adopted another kitten for my birthday that year.

this situation led my mother and his father to reconnecting and a month later they were engaged, they got married about 6 months later and had a long distance marriage of my mom traveling back and forth between him and my brother and the rest of the family.

about 4 months later my best friend moved states and it really sucked. and then another couple months passed and we found out that despite my working 60+ hours a week on top of school, i wasn’t going to be able to make ends meet anymore as we lost one source of income that had been what we needed to make ends meet each month.

so we moved my sisters into our grandparents house again since they wanted to stay in that state to finish school as they had less than a year left, i packed my stuff and my pets and after months of wondering what i was going to do a room at the house my moms husband/his parents and family/my brother opened up and my brothers grandparents were gracious enough to let me move in without having to pay rent. apparently i was a better option than the alternative. my mom conintued to split her time between here and back home.

i unexpectedly had to make a trip with my best friend back home as an old friend had passed and we wanted to attend the funeral so we went home for a couple days. a week later i was back home once again for thanksgiving and birthdays during which i was present at the mall for black friday shopping w mom and grandma and experienced a mass shooting. and then thought my sister was shopping at the same mall w her boyfriend and damn near was running back in while on the phone with them when he corrected her and told me they were at the other mall……not at all traumatizing. and again three weeks later for christmas. january i was job searching and got a job early february…just to have to, you guessed it, make another emergency trip home! my sister had gotten into a snowboarding accident so we flew my mom back there that day and the next day my sister stopped breathing because she was medically overdosed so that was a very traumatic call to get. my best friend flew me back home about a week after her accident to help out, god bless him for buying the plane tickets and my boss for hiring me and immediately letting me leave town!

while back home, my other sister got engaged, and a month later we went on a family vacation. i’m now back at my new house again, planning my next trip back home for my sisters wedding in less than a month, and a second trip later in that same month for their graduation.

seriously, bless my boss for being so insanely understanding and flexible.

throughout all this time my grandpa has had a handful of major health scares so that’s been a constant concern. but they are moving out here after my sisters graduate! and my sister that isn’t getting married is going to school in another state, and the one getting married will obviously be moving in with her soon to be husband.

hopefully i’ll have a second job by early june, and will be able to save enough to start EMT classes by august.

i don’t know how i would’ve made it through the last few years without the friends i have. they’re genuinely the best people i know. and of course my dog and cats, my babies, the reason i get out of bed.

so, if you read that far, first of all, congratulations bc that was a lot! and second, if you think that was bad, just know i was only scratching the surface! yay me…

tldr: life has actually sucked so insanely bad the last 4.5 years and it is from the combined effort of a miracle from God and a couple of ridiculous lot stubborn friend and my pets (and multiple therapists! sandra, natasha, kennedy if you see this, you the real ones!) that i’m still here.

#i forgot to add that i was diagnosed w bipolar and cptsd/ptsd😄

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starcherryberry · 4 years

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ℂ𝕠𝕝𝕠𝕣𝕤 → 𝕐𝔾 𝕩 ℝ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣 𝕩 𝕁𝕂 | 𝕄.

→ ❝ With your final semester left of university you expected to go through it easily however an issue with your credits leads you to take Professor Min’s Painting 101 course.❞

☾ Pairing: Professor!Yoongi Painter!Yoongi x Student!Reader x Student!Jungkook (this was suppose to be a yoongi x reader but somehow my mind wandered and jungkook came in lmao it be like that sometimes)

☾ Type: Poly!Relationship (literally you won’t see it until like the ending but oops)

☾ Genre: Smut ☆ Angst ☆ Fluff

☾ Word Count: 7.3k

↠ Warnings: there is an age gap between all characters involved, if you are not comfortable with that please refrain from reading. Dom!Yoongi, Dom!Jungkook, Big Cock!Yoongi, Big Cock!Jungkook, Sub!Reader, fingering, Public Sex in classroom, Body Worship (mainly JK), cockwarming (sort of not really but like for a few mins) unprotected sex (jeez many times someone wrap their doodles please)

✉ Song Recommendations: (I love kdrama osts don’t hate me, also these are all spotify links so use youtube if you don’t have it) (Legit none of these fit the tone of the fic I just luv to recommend sht hehe)

♡ Weki Meki- Love Diamond

♡ Jus2- Take

♡ Junggigo- Too Good

♡ Punch, Glabingo- Beautiful Beautiful (watch hit the top it’s a beautiful kdrama hehe)

✉ Note: Anyways this is my first fic to be uploaded on tumblr! I spent a long time revising & working on this legit I have been staring at my computer for way too long and my eyes hurt because I wanted to get this out. It’s currently 4am as I upload this so if there are errors in the text I apologize in advance. (a girl is tired) Please don’t steal! This fanfic was inspired by the constant Youtube painting lives Yoongi has had. In the midst of writing I added Jungkook because he added more into the story. I was thinking of making this into a Occupation!BTS collection where I can make one for each member with different story lines. Let me know if you want me to do so in the comments below! (okay im talking to much bye)

“Y/N it seems like you still need 4 more credits added to your schedule to be eligible to graduate this semester.” your advisor told you. You honestly didn’t know you still needed more credits to graduate, you never cared to look. So when it came to registering, you signed up for the courses you needed as part of your International Studies degree.

“What courses are still available for registration?” you asked even though you knew the number of courses to be left must be very few. “Well there is one course open, it’s Professor Min’s Painting 101. He’s a new professor here so it makes sense as to why not many students signed up with him yet. Even though this course isn’t a requirement for your major, it will definitely cover up for the credits you need Y/N so I suggest you sign up for this. His course runs every Friday at 1 pm-3 pm” your advisor said as she handed you a summary of Professor Min’s course.

You looked over the summary of the course to know what you’re getting yourself into. It was a 101 class so of course, you will be in a class full of freshmen. That wasn’t too exciting however you didn’t mind painting, you are actually quite great at it as a hobby. With one last look at the sheet, you turn to your advisor “Okay I’ll take the course”.

It was finally Friday and today includes your very first class with Professor Min. Unfortunately, you couldn’t go on Rate My Professor to see what kind of teacher was he since he’s new. ‘I swear if he’s an asshole, I’m gonna give him a fucking one’ you thought to yourself.

You were standing right in front of his classroom, sighing you stepped in to see a couple of students already seated. You tried looking for a seat next to an empty one only to see none, so you had to sit next to someone. Looking around the classroom to observe the students there, you saw a boy with long hair covering his eyes. ‘He looks like someone who won’t speak to me that’s perfect’ you thought as you made your way over and sat next to the boy.

The boy looked up, staring at you for a bit before speaking “Hello! My name is Jungkook” he said smiling. ‘Oh for fuck’s sake, I forgot how friendly these freshmen are on the first day because they have no friends’ you thought. “Uh, h-hi my name is Y/N” you waved slightly at him.

“Are you majoring in arts too?” he asked, his eyes were wide in a cute way. “No, actually I’m an International Studies major. I’m only taking this course for extra credits to graduate” you smiled at him. “Oh...so you must be older than me” he chuckled. You had, to be honest, his laugh was pretty cute. “Yeah I’m 22 however I’d like to think I was younger” you laughed and Jungkook laughed with you. You and Jungkook continued to talk until class began.

Suddenly the door opened and revealed a man who looked young with long brown and blonde hair. ‘Fuck he’s hot’ you thought as your gaze focused on him walking in. Jungkook leaned in and whispered in your ear “He’s quite the eye candy right” and you nodded. What else were you supposed to say of course you didn’t expect your painting professor to be a man who looked like he was in his mid 20’s.

Professor Min’s eyes scanned the classroom before stopping on you for a bit. You could feel your face reddening as you felt his gaze on you. ‘Fuck stop thinking like this Y/N’. As you looked up at Professor Min he broke the stare and sat at his desk. “Okay, my name is Professor Min and welcome to my Painting 101 class, this course will include beginner level painting. You will learn the steps to becoming a better painter. I expect each and every one of you to come out of this class with at least more confidence in the arts.” he said as he looked over the class.

Professor Min then took out his clipboard with the attendance sheet. He checked off each student one by one before hovering over your name tilting his head before looking up at you “Miss Y/N?” You immediately looked up at him “Yes?”. “It says here you’re a senior majoring in International Studies, is there a reason why you’re taking my course?” he asked still having his gaze on you.

“Ah um well I needed an extra course to get enough credits to graduate this semester and your course was the only option. However, I really like to paint as a hobby so I thought this class would be easy to take!” You answered trying to sound like you’re happy with taking the class. Professor Min nodded to your response “I see well welcome to the class as well” he smiled before standing up.

“So for today’s class, we’ll start easy. Each of you will be doing individual work today by making a simple painting of your choice. I decided to make this a first-day activity because I want to see where you are in terms of levels of performance with painting however expect me to make some comments as this is a college course not a high school course. This will be due in class today. I expect each of you to explain your paintings and why you made them the way they are. You have 2 hours, so please get to your stations, the materials needed are on the carts in the corner.” Professor Min stated as he went back to his desk and started to go over some paperwork while we all began to work.

The two hours of painting were almost up and to be honest you were very satisfied with your painting. You painted two pink roses tied together that were falling from the sky. ‘Professor Min is going to love this’ you smiled at the thought. Jungkook looked over your shoulder to see what you painted and laughed a bit. “That’s definitely very simple but it’s cute Y/N,” he laughed giving you a light pat on the back. You turned to see what Jungkook painted to see that he made a fucking portrait of himself A PORTRAIT! “What the fuck Jungkook how did you get that done within just 2 hours?” you ask as now you felt not so confident in your painting anymore. “Well, I am a visual arts major what did you expect” Jungkook laughed as you rolled your eyes.

“Okay the 2 hours are up, I will start walking around the class to individually speak about your paintings. Once I grade them you can leave the classroom. I will post your homework for the week on canvas so make sure to check!” Professor Min said as he started to walk around the classroom to grade students.

Soon enough he reached Jungkook and he had no problem explaining his portrait of himself. “I really love the details of your painting Jungkook, I can see you will probably be one of the more advanced skilled students in our class, your grade for this assignment is an A” Professor Min smiled as he then turned to your painting. Jungkook had packed up his things and waved at you before leaving the classroom.

It was just you and Professor Min in the classroom so the amount of nervousness you felt was really high. “Alright Y/N explain your painting to me” he asked as he looked directly at you. “Well, as you can see I painted two pink roses tied together that are also in the midst of falling from the sky. I actually didn’t know what to paint at the beginning if I had to be honest but I just let my head flow with whatever came to my mind first which was roses. Roses signify love, I’ve actually never felt that before but pink roses comfort me a lot which is why I painted them falling from the sky. The roses are not within the grass they are falling because they haven’t gotten to me even though I think about them a lot.” You were satisfied with your answer as you smiled at Professor Min.

He nodded and looked at your painting again. “I like the story behind this painting Y/N however I feel like you can add more detail in your painting. Maybe add something else to pair with the flowers or add some scenery behind it so it doesn’t look like a plain sky. I see lots of paintings like this Y/N and it’s too simple for the meaning behind it when other paintings look exactly like this. Try and add more of your other feelings to this. I will give you a C for this however if you take it home and re-do it, I can consider regrading your work” Professor Min said as he wrote down your grade on his clipboard and smiled “I’ll see you next Friday Miss Y/N” he said as he walked back to his desk.

You just stood there trying to process what the fuck he just told you. It needed more detail, more work? You were sure you added everything you needed that was in your head. ‘I can’t believe this, Jungkook painted himself and got an A, what did I do wrong?’ you thought. “Miss Y/N are you alright?” Professor Min spoke up as he saw you still standing at your station. You snapped out of it and nodded over at him “Y-yeah I was just thinking of something else sorry, have a nice day!” you said as you grabbed your bag and your painting before rushing out the classroom. ‘I hope you choke on your fucking coffee Professor Min’ you thought as soon as you exited.

It was Friday again and throughout the week you worked on revising your painting as well as become close friends with Jungkook. “Did you get your painting done Y/N?” Jungkook asked as you sat down next to him. “Yeah, I was able to finish it hopefully he’s happy with this one even though I don’t understand what I did wrong in the first place,” you said sighing while taking your painting out and setting it next to your desk. “I thought it was fine even though it was simple, I think he’s just messing with you” Jungkook laughed. “If he’s messing with me I will chop his dick off for real,” you said frustrated.“ “I see I hope you don’t plan on doing that to me too” Jungkook laughed again. “As long as you don’t piss me off too much Kook then you’ll be fine” you smiled.

In the midst of talking, Professor Min walked in “Good Afternoon class, I hope you all have your homework ready to hand in. It will be the first thing we talk about in class today”. He said as he walked up to the chalkboard to write the word ‘blue’ on it. Shit shit shit, you forgot to do your homework because you were so focused on trying to redo your painting. Seeing you in distress, Jungkook handed you a sheet of paper and winked at you. You saw a post-it note on it and it said ‘I know you were trying to get your painting done all week so I did your homework for you!’. You smiled at the note before turning to Jungkook to give him a finger heart.

“So today before we start class we will go over the homework. Before I do that please pass them up so I know none of you are going to try adding in answers.” Professor Min said as we all started to hand our homework up. “This week’s homework was to give off your own meaning of the color blue, what does it mean to you and why did you think of that when you see or think of the color blue? Compared to many other colors, blue seems to be misinterpreted the most so I wanted to see what you all thought about it before we go more into observing colors” Professor Min said as he looked over the class before his eyes landed on you. “Miss Y/N what does the color blue mean to you,” he asked.

Trying to remember what you saw in your homework that Jungkook did you tried to answer. “When I see the color blue I think about the feeling of loneliness, it’s a color that for some reason emits sadness. Whenever I am alone and have no one, the color that first comes into mind to describe my feeling is blue,” you said as you exhaled feeling like you were holding your breath because you could still feel Professor Min’s intense gaze on you. He stared at you before responding “That’s an answer I expected, I am sure many of us had similar answers. The color blue definitely has a sort of tie to sadness however blue can have other meanings too, for example, it can symbolize healing.” Professor Min said.

“Since we have about an hour left, I’d like for you all to go to your stations, and paint a fruit that represents you, the fruit must contain one of the colors we talked about today. Expect that all your paintings in class to represent yourself, because painting expresses the feeling of the artist themselves.” Professor Min said as he smiled.

“This is going to be a piece of cake,” Jungkook said as he turned to his canvas. “Do you think he’s going to correct me on this painting too?” you asked Jungkook while getting your palette out. He shook his head “Nah, come on Y/N this is fucking fruit we’re talking about there’s no way he won’t give you an A”. You honestly hope Jungkook was speaking the truth.

The class was almost over and the fruit you ended up painting was strawberries. You thought it came out pretty cute. As you turned to Jungkook’s painting you tilted your head “Weren’t we supposed to paint only one fruit, why did you paint a whole fruits basket?” you asked. Jungkook shrugged “I didn’t know what fruit to paint, I feel like I am someone with many traits that can’t be linked to just one fruit, so hopefully Professor Min likes it.” he said.

Professor Min started to walk around the classroom in order so that meant you would be last in the classroom again. He reached Jungkook “Wow Jungkook it seems as you thought outside of the box, tell me what your painting means,” Professor Min said happily. Jungkook chuckled before responding “Well I feel like my life can’t be represented through one fruit, I like to think highly of myself so painting every fruit I could think of expresses that I am happy and that having all these traits is not a problem as long as I feel content with it” Jungkook explained.

Professor Min nodded “You impressed me yet again Jungkook, that’s an A” he smiled as he moved onto your station. Jungkook gave you a huge smile and a thumbs up before leaving the classroom. “Before you show me your fruit painting I want to see your revised painting of your roses Y/N,” Professor Min said. You handed him the painting of your roses. “I added a scenery behind the roses, as you can see I added an ocean behind them. You don’t see flowers growing near the ocean, I put them there because reaching the feeling of love is rare for me and it usually wouldn’t go too far so the roses would die even if they land in the sand or water.” You spoke hoping Professor Min can give you an A.

Professor Min sighed “I think you’re thinking to deep into your feelings Y/N, the painting is beautiful actually however I’m sure love will be successful to you one day. I will up your grade for this painting to an A” he said as he moved onto your fruit painting. “Thank you! For my fruit painting, I decided to paint strawberries, they represent happiness because whenever I go eat them I’m always reminded of the pretty things in life.” You stated happily. “I think that’s a nice way to go about it Y/N however I think your strawberries need a little more detailing maybe add a prop like how jungkook added his fruits into a basket. I’ll give this a C, feel free to re-do it, and turn it in next Friday.” Professor Min said as he turned away without letting you speak.

What the fuck a C again? You didn’t understand but you didn’t care. If Professor Min wanted you to fix it then you will because you simply just wanted to graduate.

As each week passed by you became more and more frustrated. No matter what you did with all your paintings Professor Min always gives you a C just to regrade to an A once you redid them. “I’m literally going to fucking kill him if he gives me a C one more damn time” you rolled your eyes as you started to eat your pizza.

“I think he’s hitting on you Y/N” Jungkook simply said as he sipped his banana milk. With that, you started to choke on your food “W-what?” you were sure that was not it, definitely, Professor Min hates you. “I don’t know it’s just weird that he keeps doing that and that he leaves you for last when it comes to grading. Plus you’re a senior right? Professor Min is only 27 there’s not too big of an age gap between the two of you.” he shrugged as he bit his pizza. “There’s no way in fucking hell he’s hitting on me, plus isn’t that illegal for a professor to do that?!” you questioned

“Not really as long as you both give consent to each other and keep it low it’s fine, plus you’re graduating so I don’t think he sees an issue.” Jungkook said as you hit him in the head with your phone “Well I promise you that’s not it, let’s not talk about this anymore kook” Jungkook grabbed his head chuckling while you just wanted to shut the conversation off because you honestly didn’t know how to feel if Professor Min actually liked you.

“Alright, so I will be walking around the classroom to look at the different birds each of you painted. This is the last assignment before I give you your final project next week, so I hope many of you improved with this assignment if it’s not good you may have trouble with the final as I will not be offering any regrading on it.” Professor Min firmly stated.

Time passed as he went to each student before reaching Jungkook. “What do we have here Jungkook?” Professor Min asked. “I painted a bluebird Professor Min, I thought it was perfect to paint as it symbolizes the arrival of spring but with the semester ending, I feel like I have put my all into all my works so the bluebird also symbolizes hard work!” Jungkook smiled while answering. “Nicely done Jungkook, you never fail to amaze me with your work. Your grade for this assignment is an A. I actually want to speak with you in my office tomorrow, even though you’re a freshman I feel like I wouldn’t mind having you as a mentor in my courses for next term.” Professor Min said as he smiled widely at Jungkook. ‘Thank you so much, I would love to help mentor students!” Jungkook smiled even his eyes fucking smiled.

Professor Min walked over to you pulling out your grading sheet. Jungkook packed all of his things happily as he made a big heart with his hands before leaving the classroom. He has a habit of cheering you on with a cute gesture before Professor Min grades you.

“Seems like you have a similar color palette as Jungkook, what bird did you paint,” he asked looking at you. “I painted a Blue Jay Professor Min they have a meaning of being fearless. The reason why I painted it wasn’t because of the meaning but because of the color blue. I was reminded back to the popular meaning of the color blue, sadness. Even though the Blue Jay is fearless it makes me think if it sometimes feels lonely while pulling that Fearless front. I always try to stay strong for myself and pull through but there’s a point where I feel stuck but I don’t want to speak about it. We all experience fear in our lives whether that be alone or with someone else.” You exhaled as you said all of that. ‘Gosh talking for that long while having Professor Min’s stare is having too much of an effect on you’.

“Wow Y/N the meaning you put to your painting is amazing, I love the connection” he squinted at the painted before continuing. “I think you should add something into the painting that shows what the Blue Jay may have a fear of. Other than that your grade is a C. You can come into my office after Jungkook tomorrow if you want to speak more into redoing this pro-” you cut him off as at this point you already had enough.

“Why a C, I don’t understand Professor Min please make me understand why you give me a fucking C every single time just for you to give me an A after I fix minor mistakes! This isn’t right and I want a true explanation why,” you yelled as you tried to slow down with your breathing.

“Y/N please lower your tone when speaking to me” he calmly said. “No! Just tell me why! I fix everything for you just for you to do the same shit all over again” you said already feeling tears coming up “Just why, please” you begged

“Y/N….your paintings always came out beautiful even without the regrading. I was interested in you on the first day of class when I noticed you were a bit older than all the other students, you stood out to me because this also isn’t your major of focus. You stood out in so many ways and I guess I wanted to get close to you. However, as my status as a professor, I can’t just do it so easily so my way of doing it was trying to keep you in the classroom and in contact with me as long as possible. I wanted to see you more Y/N because I like you.” Professor Min said as he looked into your eyes trying to at least find something.

“P-professor Min…” you stuttered surprised by his confession. “Please call me Yoongi Y/N, class is over” he stated as he got closer to you. “I don’t know what to say...Yoongi” you said moving your gaze to the floor, you couldn’t believe he was doing all this because he liked you, Jungkook was right. Yoongi grabbed your chin lightly as he lifted it before he placed his lips on yours. You kissed back slowly as Yoongi placed his hand behind your head to deepen it.

You could feel yourself starting to get hot as things got intense with the kiss and somehow you’re at Yoongi’s desk sitting on his lap. “Fuck Y/N you’re so beautiful did you know that I’ve been thinking about you like this for a while now,” he said in between the kiss as he could feel you trying to rut on his bulge. He chuckled “I bet your so wet right now Y/N look at you rutting against my cock that’s not even out for you yet.” You whined as you just wanted some pleasure, it’s been a while since you hooked up with anyone. “Yoongi please I just want your cock,” you said trying to rub your clothed core on his lap for stimulation. “Yeah? Want my cock right here huh when anyone can walk in and see my cock stuffed in your pussy?” Yoongi kissed your neck as you moaned. His words were so dirty which turned you on even more. “Yes yes Y-yoongi I need it!” you cried out.

“I need your pants off Y/N,” he said as he helped you take off your pants leaving you in just your underwear. You couldn’t believe you were doing this in a classroom with your own Professor. You helped Yoongi take his pants off and then you were left staring at his boxers. “Y/N take my cock out and suck” he demanded as he stared at you. You could tell he was already eye-fucking you. You put your hand into the opening of his boxers and pulled out his cock.

Fuck. He. Was. Huge

You didn’t waste time given the circumstances you’re in, you started to suck his cock. You couldn’t fit all of him it was too much however Yoongi grabbed the back of your head forcing his cock to go all the way in your mouth making you tear up. “Fuck Y/N that’s it take this cock, I think I’ll come soon” Yoongi growled as he guided your head down his cock. While you were sucking, Yoongi took out his phone to capture the sight of you. He never painted nude paintings because he wanted to wait for someone he loved to do so. Just by looking at you, he wanted to make you into art for only him to see.

You could feel Yoongi’s grip on your head tighten signaling that he was close to cumming. “Y/N where do you want me to cum sweetheart,” he asked looking down at you his hair sticking to his skin. You pointed to your mouth as you couldn’t form words obviously. “Your mouth is so good for me Y/N taking this cock so well” he grunted before he shot his cum into your mouth slowing down the pace of his hand on your head.

You swallowed every drop before lifting yourself onto his lap and leaning in to kiss him again. “Y/N I want my cock inside you,” he said as he grabbed your ass and positioned you over the tip of his cock before slamming inside you. “Yoongi! Fuck ugh!” you moaned out loud before Yoongi placed his hand on your mouth. “Baby you have to be quiet unless you want to let the whole school know your mine” he whispered in your ear. You moaned loudly into his hands, you couldn’t help it because Yoongi didn’t even let you adjust to his cock.

“Your pussy is so tight Y/N I might cum sooner then I thought” he moaned as he flips you over. Your face was now against his desk as Yoongi was fucking you from behind. “C-cum inside me Y-yoongi!” you cried out without thinking. Yoongi started to thrust harder and deeper “Shit okay Y/N, Do you like that? Having your professors cock inside your sweet little pussy to make you nice and full?” he growled as he started to slam his cock in and out your pussy. “Yes yes yes! I like that Y-yoongi! I-I’m going to cum fuck!” You suddenly saw white spots as your orgasm hit, you could feel Yoongi’s pace fastening as he started to spurt his cum into you.

Oh, fuck what have I done.

Yoongi pulled out slowly catching his breath before putting on his pants. “Y/N? Are you okay sweetheart?” he asked as he grabbed some tissues to clean you up. Without taking a glance at him you started to quickly put on your clothes. “Y/N?” he called out worried that you weren’t responding. “We can’t do this Yo- Professor Min it’s inappropriate and was a mistake I need to go,” you said as you teared up. You quickly grabbed your things ignoring Professor Min’s calling out.

You dialed Jungkook’s number hoping he would pick up. “Hey Y/N finished with talking with Professor Min?” he answered as you sniffled. “Y/N? Are you okay? Do you need me to take you back to your dorm?” he asked. “Please hurry Kook, I c-can’t do this” you pleaded. Jungkook comforted you through the phone as he went over to pick you up.

“So you had sex with Professor Min?” Jungkook blinked repeatedly as he was trying to take in the whole story. You nodded wiping your tears “It was wrong but it felt so good and it’s bothering me kook, I don’t know what to tell him.” Jungkook handed you a tissue “Y/N there’s obviously feelings between the both of you the only thing stopping you are each other statuses. The fact that Yoongi didn’t kick you out of the classroom and offered to clean you shows that he isn’t one of those people. I’m sure he’s hurt too Y/N. The best advice I can give is for both of you to give each other space until you’re ready to confirm your feelings back. If you realize the relationship is no good then let him know.” he stated as he gave you a hug. “Thank you, Kook. I’m surprised you don’t have a girlfriend when you’re so nice” you tried to smile as you were in Jungkook’s arm.

“I do have a crush on someone but I don’t think she likes me back” he sighed. “At least try but don’t fuck up like me” you chuckled. Jungkook nodded the problem was that you didn’t know that you were his crush. Jungkook was in love with you but he knew that it was never going to happen.

It was suddenly Friday again which means you had to see Yoongi. You were nervous you had no contact with him since you two had sex. You walked into the classroom seeing Jungkook give you a warm smile. Jungkook pointed in front of you so you looked over just to see Professor Min was early however he looked less like his happy self.

“Alright, so today’s class will be short because I will assign you all your final projects. For this project, you must make a collage of a color with multiple shades that speak words. You have 2 weeks to complete this project class dismissed.” Professor Min said as he gathered his things and left the classroom.

“Woah that was quick, Professor Min always uses his full class time no matter what,” Jungkook said as he sighed. “I think it’s because of me Kook, fuck what have I done. I really fucked everything up I’m sure instead of a C he’s going to give me an F.” You felt like crying, to be honest. “Hey, it’s okay. Want to come over my place to destress? We can watch Disney movies?” Jungkook smiled as he wanted to make you happy. You nodded “That would be great Kook” you smiled.

You and Jungkook were currently on the 5th Disney movie for the night. “Why can’t my love life be like a Disney movie, I feel like my story with Yoongi is like one of those tragedies before they get remade into a Disney Movie” you sighed reaching for some strawberries. Jungkook’s grip tightened on his cup of juice, he hated how you only spoke about Yoongi since the incident occurred. “Y/N if you keep thinking about Professor Min you’ll only stress yourself out more, give it a rest for just a bit, and maybe talk with him when finals are done?” he suggested.

“The problem is that he’s all I ever think about Jungkook, I really thought I could forget about him even while watching these movies but it’s worse now.” you sighed. Jungkook looked at you for a moment before suggesting something that made you confused. “Then let me help you forget,” he said as he looked into your eyes. “Jungkook?” you were confused by what he meant, as you laid your eyes on him his lips were against yours. Unlike the kiss with Yoongi, you weren’t responding back. “Please Y/N…..just for today...let me do this,” he asked as his eyes looked into yours searching for permission to continue. Jungkook was younger than you by a few years but you trust him and know he means no harm and that he just wants to help. You nodded as you kissed Jungkook back.

In just about 5 minutes both yours and Jungkook’s clothes were discarded on the floor. “Fuck Y/N is this what you let Professor Min see? He doesn’t deserve to see your beautiful body.” Jungkook said as he placed his mouth over your nipple. You moaned out “J-Jungkook!” as Jungkook started to suck on your breasts “Did Professor Min worship your breasts like this? I bet he hasn’t huh” he chuckled as he gave you small bites over your chest. Your hands reached to Jungkooks bottom half as you tried to grab his cock. He wasn’t as big as Yoongi but definitely Jungkook’s cock was thicker making your pussy clench around nothing. “Eager aren’t you Y/N? Just want my cock in your tight pussy right?” Jungkook smirked.

“Please Jungkook no teasing I just want you inside” you whined as you could already feel some of your arousal slipping out. Jungkook laid your body onto the couch. He left for a bit to grab something only to come back with a blindfold. “A b-blindfold?” you titled your head.

“I know you don’t love me Y/N, I’m only helping you take your mind off things so I thought having you wear the blindfold would help because I don’t want anything to change between us,” he said as he placed it over your eyes. “Thank you Kook, don’t worry I won’t forget about you and I feel bad for even letting this happen, I don’t want to lead you on,” you said sadly. “Y/N I wanted this too I promise you I’m okay with this,” he said softly.

Jungkook wasted no time as he hovered over you inching his cock slowly inside you. He groaned “Mm Y/N your so fucking wet just for me, look at how easily you’re taking this cock”. You moaned as you felt Jungkook stretching you out, you could only see darkness which caused you to clench on him. He hissed “Y/N please don’t clench like that baby I might cum within seconds.” he laughed. His laugh brought a smile to your face, you definitely felt comfort in Jungkook’s arm.

Jungkook spent his time thrusting into you repeatedly, you could feel yourself about to cum soon as your walls started to tighten around Jungkook’s cock. “K-kook I’m going to cum” you moaned as you gripped Jungkook’s back hard. “F-fuck okay I think I’m going to cum soon too Y/N, want me to cum inside you?” he asked heavily panting as he continued to thrust into you. “Yes come inside me I know you want to Kook” Jungkook’s heart felt like it was going to explode he was doing this for you but he smiled as you cared about his feelings too. You knew that the both of you probably won’t ever do this again which is why you agreed.

Jungkook changed positions as now you were sitting on his lap, He grabbed your waist making sure to help you with the pace. You wrapped your arms around him as you felt your orgasm hitting you “Jungkook ugh cum in me now” you whined as Jungkook thrust you through your orgasm and then cumming inside you.

You laid on top of Jungkook with his cock still inside you catching your breath. “You good Y/N? Let’s get you cleaned up, you can stay over if you want for the night I’ll sleep on the couch.” Jungkook offered as he slipped your blindfold off. You nodded already feeling sleepy “Thank you kook, and I’m so so sorry. I really hope one day a person who deserves you a lot will love you” you teared up saying it because you didn’t want to hurt him he’s your friend who loves you and you weren’t sure if you liked him back.

Jungkook smiled as he slipped out of you “Y/N it’s okay I’m just happy that I could take your mind off things for a bit, if it all goes wrong just know I’ll welcome you with open arms” he said as he helped clean you up before handing you some extra clothes to put on.

2 weeks passed like it was nothing and soon enough it was Friday the day finals were due. “What color did you base your collage painting on kook?” you asked him. “Oh I based it on the color purple, apparently it signifies having creativity and I definitely think I represent that” he laughed. “You really love yourself, huh, but that’s a good thing so I can’t really make fun of you for it” you chuckled.

“What about yours Y/N?” with his question you paused before speaking “Well um it’s based around the color pink. I can’t go much into detail but basically this is my confession painting to Professor Min” you said blushing a bit, nervous to speak to Professor Min after weeks have passed. “Ah is that why you didn’t attach an explanation note to your painting,” he asked and you nodded. “Good luck Y/N, I hope everything works out and let me know if you guys get some,” he said wiggling his brows. You laughed and playfully pushed him.

Professor Min walked in and stood in front of the class. “Alright everyone today is your last class with me today. Don’t worry we aren’t going to be doing anything today. All you have to do is bring your canvas up to the front of the room and make sure your explanation notes are attached to your paintings. I hope you all have a wonderful summer break” Professor Min smiled as students started to submit their paintings and then walk out the classroom.

Jungkook patted you lightly on the back and gave you a thumbs up before leaving the classroom. You smiled and started to pack up your things slowly as you waited for Professor Min to notice that you didn’t attach a note to your painting.

“Miss Y/N please come to my desk, the rest of you drop your paintings here and go” he stated.

Here we go, you exhaled before walking over to his desk. “Yes Professor Min?” you asked fully knowing what he was going to tell you. “I don’t see an explanation note attached to your painting,” he said as he looked up at you for the first time in weeks. “I didn’t write one,” you said plainly. “Well since you didn’t write one I am going to have to give you a-” before Professor Min could continue you cut him off “I love you Yoongi,” you said looking at him for a reaction.

“Y/N wha-” he said in a surprised tone. “My painting, it’s my response back to your confession Yoongi. I found love and it’s you” you told him as you started to blush. “Really?” he asked and you nodded.

“Fuck come here Y/N” Yoongi called and you obliged and sat on his lap to start kissing him. “Gosh so that means your mines now?” he asked as he started to undress you. “Y-yes I’m yours now Yoongi officially” you let Yoongi undress you as you stared at his eyes while he was doing so. Yoongi paused as he saw bite marks over your chest. “Y/N where did these marks come from” as you didn’t answer he inserted two fingers into your pussy thrusting them in. “Who did it Y/N tell me right now or I won’t give you my cock,” he said sternly as you cried out “Jungkook Jungkook did them!”

Yoongi chuckled “Where’s your phone Y/N” you pointed to your desk. Yoongi pulled out his fingers as he made his way over to your desk. “What’s the password,” he asked. “Bluemyg” he typed in the password as he started to look for Jungkook’s number in your contacts and pressed call when he found it. Jungkook immediately answered of course because it’s you.

“Did everything go well Y/N?” Jungkook asked. “Come to my class Jungkook right now,” Yoongi said as he hung up the phone turning it on silent. “Yoongi what are you doing?” you wanted to know why in the world did he call Jungkook over when you’re naked on his desk. Yoongi didn’t answer you back and slid his cock inside you “Fuck even after Jungkook fucked you he left you nice and tight for me” Yoongi chuckled.

Jungkook entered into the classroom to see Professor Min with his cock inside you. “H-huh,” Jungkook said as his eyes were blown wide. “Jungkook put your cock in her mouth,” Yoongi said not giving Jungkook an explanation. Jungkook just stood there trying to process what’s going on.

You moaned out “Jungkook just do it, it’s okay!”. With permission on your end, Jungkook unzips the front of his pants and pulls his cock out. He made his way over and placed his cock right above your mouth. “Y/N suck,” Yoongi demanded. You opened your mouth to take Jungkook in while looking up into his eyes.

“Isn’t she gorgeous Jungkook, taking two cocks at the same time with the door wide open for anyone to see,” Yoongi said as he continued to thrust into you. Jungkook nodded as he guided your head to suck his cock. You could barely think about anything when you had two cocks occupying your holes. You pulled away from Jungkook’s cock “I-I’m going to cum”. “Jungkook put your cock in her mouth again and cum when I say so okay?” Yoongi said as Jungkook agreed while thrusting his cock back into your mouth.

You started to clench harder around Yoongi’s cock as you whined while having Jungkook’s cock deep in your throat. “Cum” at that moment Jungkook and Yoongi started to pound into you and release their load. Your vision blacked out after your orgasm.

“Is she okay?” Jungkook asked as Yoongi closed the classroom door and pulled down the shades. “She’ll be fine, I think she was overwhelmed by taking the both of us,” Yoongi responded as he went over to you to start cleaning you up with wipes. “I’m not sure if Y/N will be okay with it, we’ll have to get her opinion on it, but I don’t mind having you in the relationship as well Jungkook I know you love her too,” Yoongi suggested. Jungkook’s eyes widened “R-really? Prof- Yoongi are you sure” Jungkook asked not expecting this. Yoongi nodded “I’m super sure” he smiled.

You opened your eyes to look to the right to see both Yoongi and Jungkook talking. “Did I pass out?” you asked making your presence known. Both of them looked at you and nodded. “Y/N how about adding Jungkook into our relationship?” Yoongi asked immediately. Your gaze turned to Jungkook expecting your answer “I-I don’t mind….I know you thought I didn’t love you Jungkook but after that night my feelings started to develop for you.” you smiled “I love you both” you said as you walked up to the both of them and kiss them both on the lips.

“Since we’re still sorta naked how about we make a body painting collage using all the colors we can” Jungkook suggested.

“I’m all in for it what about you Yoongi?” you asked looking at him. He laughed “Wow this is going to be a long day, let’s do it!”

✈ Um hi! I hope you enjoyed my very first fic on tumblr. Please leave me feedback down below whether it’s good or bad. I will start working on getting a masterlist post soon! Feel free to ask me questions or make comments on ‘Ask Starrymin’.

✈ I will try my best to get the Mother’s day Barista!Namjoon x Single Mother!Reader fic done this week. My plan was to get it done today however colors took me much longer than I thought. So please wait a little more until I upload it!

✈ Anyways I hope you all have a wonderful day! Please stay safe and healthy. Also I’d like to wish Happy mother’s day to all the moms out there and even mother like figures too!

→ Feel free to support me on Kofi

→ My BTS fic recs

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detectivejay-chuckles-halstead · 4 years

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Nervous Breakdown // Jay Halstead x Reader

Photo by @karihighman

Description: Jay is there when you start to break down.

Words: 1539

Warnings: None

Pairing: Jay x Reader

A/N: So, this I wrote for me. The schedule Reader talks about is my actual schedule. The sign offs are the things I actually need. This was me last night, except I didn’t have someone like Jay to talk me down from my nervous break down, I just had it and then had to be at my clinical this morning (which I’m still at btw lol). But yeah. Hope you enjoy. And if my posting is sporadic in the next month or so, this is why.

“Come to bed,” Jay told you softly, leaning on the doorframe of your bedroom with his arms crossed over his chest as he looked at you with papers spread across the floor, couch, and coffee table.

Your movements were frantic as you tried to organize them all, trying to figure out the best system to keep everything together. Every section was chronologically ordered for the online documentation, paper clips holding each stack together. Then, there were the colored sheets that had even more important signatures on them. You had to make sure everything was in order as class was drawing to an end.

“I’ll sleep when I’m done, Jay,” you snapped at him before closing your eyes and taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry, I just-”

“I know.” He walked over, stepping around the stacks before sitting directly behind you in the only place clear of paper. “Come here.”

You couldn’t stop yourself from leaning back into his chest, his arms wrapping around you. Grounding you as your mind went a mile a minute. You also couldn’t stop yourself from grabbing your calendar, flipping it open to this month.

“What’s the schedule look like?” His chin rested on your shoulder as he looked at the planner.

“I have to help with the EMT class Saturday from seven to three. Then I start my shift at work at eight tomorrow night. Then, work Sunday night. So I’m going to try and catch up on some sleep on Sunday. I have my exam in Med Emergencies on Monday. Then, I have an ambulance clinical AM shift at seven. Same on Wednesday. A quiz in Med Emergencies on Thursday. Then, I work Thursday night. Off at eight on Friday morning, but I picked up a shift from two to ten Friday day. Then, ambulance clinical on Saturday AM shift.

Same with that next Sunday. A quiz in Med Emergencies on the seventeenth. Then work that night. Work the night of the eighteenth, but I’m off at four in the morning instead of my usual eight. Mainly because I have an OR clinical on the nineteenth from seven to three. But then I work that night, off at five on the twentieth because I have an exam in Med Emergencies that day. Ambulance clinical AM shift on the twenty-first. Twenty-second, I have an ER shift from seven to three, then I work that night. Work Sunday night, so I’m going to try to catch up on sleep that day.

Twenty-fourth I have another exam in Med Emergencies. Ambulance AM shift on the twenty-fifth and sixth. Then, we review for our Final in Med Emergencies, but I work that night. I’ll get off at six to get to my ambulance clinical on the twenty-eight at seven. I work that night, but off at five to get to my Maternal-Fetal Truck shift by eight.

On the thirtieth, I have an ER shift from three to eleven. The thirty-first, I have my final in Med Emergencies, and then work that night. Off the day of the first, but I work that night. Then, an ER shift at three on the second. Then, I work that night, but I’m going to try to switch shifts just because my ER shift won’t finish until eleven. The third, we have our student evals. The fourth, I’m helping the junior class with their Ops day, and then I have an ambulance clinical that night. Off the fifth, but work that night. Off the sixth, but work that night. Seventh is labor day, so completely free. ER shift on the eighth at three. Then, on the ninth, OR shift at seven.

“After that, I don’t know because we haven’t signed up for our capstone. Which all of this,” you said, motioning to the mess of papers, “is me getting everything in order to make sure I have everything done and what I still need. Because we can’t start capstone until all of our skills check offs are done, and we’ve hit all of our demographics.”

“What do you have left to do for your skills?” That question got you to sigh, putting the planner down and grabbing a notebook. You had to push your glasses back up on your face as you looked down at your messy handwriting.

“Five peer reviews for pediatric intubations. Two peer reviews for needle cricothyrotomy. Three peer and two instructor reviews for trauma assessment. Five peer reviews for trauma intubations. Two instructor reviews for joint splinting -- which I’m already an EMT, why the Hell do I have to sign off on the BLS stuff again? Same with long-bone. I need one peer review and two instructor for traction splint. Again, BLS bullshit. Seven peer reviews for medical and cardiac scenarios. Eleven peer reviews for IV starts, and one instructor. One instructor for IV piggyback. Five peer reviews for IO. Oh, and another instructor. Three peer for IM injection. Three peer for synchronized cardioversion. One peer for defibrillation. Three peer transcutaneous pacing. Four peer reviews and one instructor for adult team lead scenarios. Five peer reviews and one instructor for pediatric team lead scenarios. Eleven peer reviews for being a team member. Three peer reviews for being a team leader for geriatric scenarios. Six peer and one instructor reviews for adult physical assessments. And finally. Six peer and one instructor review for pediatric assessment,” you read off, letting the paper fall to the ground.

He held you a little tighter. You felt bad. With all the stress you’d been under for the past month, and with how crazy his job was, the two of you hadn’t gotten to spend a lot of time together. And the next month was going to be even crazier.

“When are you supposed to start your capstone?” He pressed a kiss to your neck, your eyes fluttering closed in response.

“They want us to start September Ninth, but I’m going to be the last one who gets to sign up because I’m so far behind! Everyone is going to pick the cool preceptors, and I’m going to get stuck with the ones nobody else wants,” you vented before huffing in frustration.

It was indeed very frustrating, stressful, and downright annoying that you were so far behind compared to everyone else. That’s what happens when you have to be off for six weeks because you tore your knee. Now, it was a constant game of catch-up.

“Just breathe when I breathe,” Jay instructed in that calming voice, following his breathing pattern. It got your heart rate down as tears came to your eyes, despite your internal protests. You were on the verge of a nervous breakdown, and it wasn’t going to be pretty.

“Maybe you should email your instructor?” he suggested when you had your breathing under control on your own.

“And have her take me off all my clinicals and reschedule everything? No. No fucking way. I can’t just email her and schedule my nervous breakdown, Jay. She was very clear in first semester that if we took on too much and couldn’t handle it, she’d take us off our clinicals and completely reschedule everything. I can’t do that, Jay. I can’t because then I’ll be even further behind.” You were talking a mile a minute, Jay taking a deep breath behind you. You took the hint and matched your breathing again.

“Okay, then don’t email her. But, I want you to come to bed right now. It’s two in the morning. You have an ambulance clinical in five hours. You need your sleep. All of this will be waiting for you when you come home tonight,” he insisted. You didn’t want to, but you knew he was right.

The two of you stood up, walking into the bedroom. You couldn’t help it as you collapsed on the bed with a groan, much more comfortable than the hard floor in the living room. He wasted no time in joining you, pulling you close again. This time, you were able to see his face at least, tracing his features gently with soft fingertips. You missed him.

“How about we do something Labor Day? Just you and me to destress a bit?” you asked, Jay nodding in agreement before lips met gently. “I miss you.”

“I miss you too,” he said with a soft chuckle, kissing you again. “But you’re almost done. This is the worst of it. After your final, you’re pretty much done with lecture. Capstone is your last hoorah. Then, your tests and you’ll finally be a paramedic after over a year. Doing this through a pandemic. Through all your family crap. I’m proud of you.”

“You really know how to sweet talk a lady,” you joked, resting your head on his chest.

It was the exact thing you needed to hear. Jay always knew what to say. You were so close to being done. Then, you’d be in your dream career. All the hard work was going to be worth it. The thousands of hours in clinicals, the hundreds of hours in class. The countless sleepless nights and caffeine filled days. Yes. It would be all worth it. Just a couple more months to go. And Jay was by your side.

#jay halstead #jay halstead imagine #jay halstead x reader #jay halstead imagines

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humanitysbridge · 4 years

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im the type of dummy who procrastinates so hard that i have multiple written starters/replies in my drafts but I haven’t cleaned them up and put it off for.....like a week

no i’m not about to post them, i’m a dummy so here’s me rambling about vic’s sexuality/interpersonal relationships because I wanted this somewhere on this blog eventually and i’d like to procrastinate some more

(photo descrip: me, clutching what i think will be an eloquent dissertation but will just be full of run-on sentences and incoherent ideas. sorry in advance)

hi. hello. you brave, poor bastard. thanks for clicking. let’s just jump right into it

pls don’t steal my headcanons my galaxy brain tried hard

let’s get it straight (ha), victor grew up extremely isolated--no friends until he was around 12--but his parents have always been on the liberal side. educated scientists who don’t see sexuality aligning with morality because they see its fluidity in nature so often. why should humans be any different? he’s never felt pressured by society to like cis women because it seems like such a small detail in this infinitely large world. there was a bigger emphasis on monogamy (mainly bc his parents were soulmates), which has been engrained in vic. if he were to be in a relationship with more than one person there’d have to be a lot of trust, love, and communication between all partners. whether it’s a single partner or two (he’d cap at throuple), loyalty and faithfulness are imperative.

his father and mother, though too preoccupied to spend time with their son, always found time for each other. it’s one of the few things that vic respects about his father---he loved elinore through sickness and past death. it’s something vic wants. his parents had him at an older age and weren’t interested in adoption, so having a sibling was out of the question. young victor jumped to the next best thing: daydreaming about growing up and having a big family. the idea of a partner was vague, he’s always just wanted someone to love him and show him affection without expectation. he wanted to have a bunch of children so they could have friends and never be lonely. he wanted to play catch and go to the zoo.

he’s never had a particular sway toward gender. heteronormativity is present, of course, but doesn’t hold a lot of water. the boy is a genius, and when he has complicated questions about self-identification, his parents are giving him something to read so they can discuss over a scheduled dinner.

what am i saying, then? sick, thanks for asking. thanks for reading this far. drink some water if you haven’t recently. and stretch if you’ve been sat for a while x

i’m saying that by the time vic goes to high school, he’s interacting heavily with folks his age for the first time ever. he does not NEED high school. like, he was past high school learning so early on. but he needs the social interaction and that’s why he goes. so when he starts working out and joins the football team, he gets unexpected attention from a few of the girls at school.

he dates them, gets a girlfriend, is pretty sure he’s in love, and everything is PERFECT. he’s going to play college ball until he gets picked up by the n/fl. he’ll ask his girl to marry him and then they’ll start a family. he’ll retire and just. be a dad. a husband. a friend. he’s a romantic fool every day of the week.

sucks, though, because he gets blown up and sort of dies, wakes up and he’s got a whole new body and a steaming cup of self-hate waiting for him. his girlfriend wishes he died in the accident. his dad expects him to be grateful, but he overhears silas asking ‘did i make my son a monster?’ so......that’s less sick.

between dealing with newfound body issues, trying to control his new abilities, fighting with his father, grieving his body and his mother, and losing everything he’s been working towards in high school---vic has no time to date around. he can’t even fathom someone wanting to be with someone like him; a freak of nature (no, a freak of science. somehow that’s worse)

presently: in my main verse, vic has only been in 2 official relationships (high school gf & jinx--both taking place during his teens) but is presently single. he’s attempted dating with folks who identify various ways, but his own insecurities/heroic duties land him right back where he started. alone. at the end of the day, all he wants is someone who wants him back. who really loves him and makes him feel less lonely on his dark days. someone who can pick up on his moods when he’s getting tired from shouldering the world.

though vic might flirt with people he finds attractive, there’s rarely a lot of feeling behind it. he gets looked over for most romantic relationships---more often propositioned for meaningless sex, which he may take up but he’ll be big sad after---so he’s used to empty flirtations with friends and villains alike. in my main verse, vic has gotten comfortable with being single forever. he’s downsized his childhood dream to supporting upcoming heroes and being a needed authoritative/familial figure.

IMPORTANT: interpersonal relationships are what vic thrives on. just because he’s given up on seeking romance, does not mean he’s isolated. his friends, found family, and mentees are the WORLD to him. he’d do anything to protect them all. he just....knows that they’ll all move on eventually, so he has to be comfortable being alone.

welp the sun is about to come up and i def have to be up soon so thanks again for reading this dumb long post that’s kind of about nothing

#;;database // hc #;;out of memory // ooc #i feel like i'm glossing over a lot of stuff so if you have questions i guess???#i hope i covered this well i'll re-read after i get a little sleep #it felt like it was getting to long i do might cut this down i don't expect y'all to read this #;;long post

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yoong-seok · 5 years

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Ring, Ring

Pairing: yoongi x reader, romantic or platonic, up to you!

Genre: Fluff, comfort

Word Count: 1362

Warnings: This does bring up/deal with panic attacks and anxiety attacks.

A/N: Hi! I haven’t posted in a long time mainly bc I kept writing, editing, deleting, and so on. This took two months...and even now I’m not fully satisfied, but sometimes you just gotta let things GO. I’m thinking of having a lil mini-series? with each of the members. It’ll be called Ring, Ring! I hope you guys enjoy, and as always any critique is welcomed! (also im sorry if there are still some mistakes!) I want to also shout out to @versigny !!! I had asked her if I could use a line she had used in her fic bc I loved it so much and it tbh inspired this and she was sooooo nice and kind. Pls follow her (but u prob already do bc her writing is beautiful). I didn’t end up using it, but her kindness is just something I have to thank her for!

Within the expanse of your bed, you feel cold. As you lay curled up, head bowed down, legs brought up your stomach in a loose fetal position, your teeth chattering and your heart feeling lonely. Growing up, you had the comfort of your loved ones. From summer vacations with your cousins, piling on the beds, sharing blankets and jokes; to winter holidays, fitting too many onto a small loveseat as you opened any gifts and shared stories. You never once felt alone. The warmth and love had always washed over you, and you’ve grown so used to it.

But, now, you’re all alone. Far from your family with a new house in a new city, a new job, and a new life. It’s overwhelming. The emptiness of your house is suffocating. You take in each breath from your nose, the icy air stinging as it travels down to your lungs and back out again. Tomorrow, you were going to walk around and acquaint yourself with the new surroundings, but you don’t want to. You want to go back home. Back to warmth. Back to your family—their love and reassurance. Back to-

"Hello?" you hear. As you calm down, you notice you’re sitting against the bed frame, phone in hand. Briefly, you check the screen to see who’s on the other side of the phone.

"Yoongi," you try to breathe out, but the panic attack still hasn't left your lungs, so you barely choke out the 2 syllables.

"Hey, what's wrong? Are you okay?" his voice is gruff, laden with concern. You don’t even know what time it is, but the sky absorbs the aura of lights from the city. "Hey, it's okay. You’re at your new place, right? I'll be there in 5 minutes. Do you want me to stay on the line until I get there?" You shake your head and croak out no. "I'll see you soon."

You hang up and only then do you notice the time: 2 AM. He was sleeping, and you woke him up because you didn’t know how to be alone. How stupid. Your breathing became ragged. Hiccups falling between every few breaths. You wipe your tears harshly and quickly go to your call logs to call Yoongi back. Tell him he doesn't need to come over. You're sorry, you shouldn't have disturbed him, he has a full schedule tomorrow and he needs as much sleep as he can. Yet, as the ringing continues, you know that he’s already on his way.

You’ve known Yoongi for nearly half your life. The two of you had met in high school. As a lonely freshman, you walked around during lunch period, trying to find somewhere to eat. You decided to sit next to the music classroom. Finishing your sandwich, you heard someone playing the piano from inside the room. You peeked through the small window and saw the back of the blue suit from the school uniform. The soft notes of Fur Elise were playing before he stopped and began playing a piece that was unfamiliar to you. It sounded good. He was really good. The lunch bell rang and he turned, seeing you staring at him. You quickly threw your lunch in the trash and ran to class, feeling your face grow hot.

The next time you saw him was later that day when you were waiting for your mom to pick you up. You were staring at your phone and didn’t notice him walk next to you.

“You were outside the music room, right?” his low voice asked. You jumped slightly. Your ears grew warm as you recognized the face.

“Um...yeah. Sorry…” you mumbled. He said nothing for a moment, and you feared that he would make fun of you.

“Why were you sitting alone for lunch?” he asked. You looked up at him, but he kept his eyes forward.

“Oh, um, I’m a freshman. I don’t have friends, yet...” you answered him, slightly shocked that he was keeping a conversation with you. He paused again.

“Did you like it?” he asked in a softer tone. “Not Fur Elise...the other thing.”

“Oh yeah! I didn’t recognize it, but it was really good.”

“It was uh....” he sighed, “It was my own song. I’ve been working on it for a while.” Your eyes widened.

“No way! It was so good. It sounded beautiful! I don’t know much about music, but it was really pretty.” He finally looked down at you and you found yourself mesmerized by his brown eyes, and beautiful pale skin. And he let out a small smile. You found yourself smiling back at him.

“My name is Yoongi.” He sticks his hand out for you to shake.

“I’m ____.”

The doorbell rings through your apartment. You get up from bed and open the door.

He’s in sweats and a stained t-shirt that is likely from the laundry basket. A light black jacket covers his frame. He had dark circles under his eyes, and his black hair was sticking out in all directions. He walks inside, arms reaching out to a hug. The jacket and t-shirt have residual cologne, a musky scent with a mix of something you couldn't place...kimchi?

"Hey, I'm sorry. I was already driving when you called and it was on vibrate, I didn't hear it or see it until I got here," he says, the gruffness from earlier still lingering. “Are you okay?” Why is he apologizing? You’re the one who called him in the middle of the night, woke him up, made him worried enough to drive to your apartment. He has nothing to apologize for, you did.

“I’m okay. I’m sorry for worrying you and waking you up, I bet you have work tomorrow,” you mumble into his shirt, the sound of your voice muffled.

“Psshh, no. I was already up,” he says. You give him a knowing look. He tries to keep a straight face but gives up after your continued glare. “Okay, so I was sleeping, but don’t be sorry. I’m glad you called me.” You groan lightly into his shirt and mumble out another apology. "Let's go to bed," his voice barely reaches your ears. You nod noticing your lack of energy. You lay down and he sits against the headboard. He's being so kind and patient, not forcing you to say anything or asking any questions. It reminds you of how nurturing he is. You don't deserve him.

"I just got so overwhelmed," your voice is soft, yet the cracks from the panic attack are still reminiscent. You stare at the ceiling. He hums. You turn and face him. Instinctively, you burrow into his chest. Yoongi lightly wraps his arms around you before speaking,

"Do you want to talk about it?" You deeply breathe in his hearty scent again. Your eyes flutter shut. Home.

“I’m just so alone," you begin to ramble. "I always had friends or family with me, but now, I’m by myself and I don’t know anyone here, and I’m so scared to go out and have to experience everything all alone. It’s too much for me.”

Yoongi is silent.

"I know you don’t want to hear me say that you’re not alone…I hated it when everyone said it to me…” You realize he probably went through a similar experience when he first moved to Seoul so many years ago. “Everything feels so scary. And it seems like you’ll never fit in.

“But, you’ll make friends. You’ll meet people. You think you’ll feel lonely forever, but I promise it won’t.” He lifts your head. The deep coffee of his eyes stare into your soul. You feel vulnerable. You feel naked. "And you have me and the boys. You can always call us.” He smiles, looking into your eyes. Feeling the original comfort of warmth, love, and reassurance, you smile back.

You don't know how to respond or what to say. Yoongi brushes his lips against your hair and you grip onto him. The change wouldn't happen overnight. Not much will change over the next few weeks. But, you feel safe knowing that Yoongi is by your side for the unknown future.

#yoongi x reader #bts x reader #bts scenario #yoongi scenario #suga x reader #suga scenario

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my-autistic-things · 6 years

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Top Surgery Post Op

Hey guys so this post is old and the original bit is under the keep reading. I wanted to keep a record for myself mainly, but oh well! Today is 9-5-18. As a quick update because I didn’t give any other updates since forever ago:

-I’m still numb

-I still have swelling

-I still wear my binder, but it’s not uncomfortable anymore because there's nothing to smoosh

-My doctor said that I don’t have to wear my binder, but since there is still swelling it would be beneficial if I could continue to wear it

-I don’t wear my binder at night/at home, but when I go out I still always wear my binder just because I feel more comfortable with it on

--I feel better with my binder because 1, pressure stim! 2, I’m not flat. While I look the same as any other chubby cis guy, I’m still uncomfortable and it will take a really long time for me to get to where I am comfortable to just wear a shirt

-My incision sites have healed to just a little dark pink lines (~1/2 inch) and the drainage tube holes have healed also to dark pink dots (honestly they are way more noticeable than the actual incisions)

Ok that's it! I might remember to make another update, but probably not for a while. Below is my recovery from day 0 if anyone is interested.

I wanted to make a super extensive post, but, I didn't. Now I'm going to summarize the key points if my recovery bc I still really want to keep record of it and share a timeline of when things happen.

If you're interested in my top surgery story illustrating the whole day of surgery, here is that post!

Day 0; Thursday, day of surgery:

When I came home from the hospital I just slept. My mom woke me up to take my meds (prescription pain killer and antibiotics) and then I went right back to sleep. I couldn't roll on to my side so sleeping was pretty miserable but I pulled up pillows so I was half sitting up which helped me get comfortable. The drains were super annoying and I was trying to be super careful with my chest, but, I was fine.

Day 1; Friday:

I have no idea what time I woke up or what time I took my naps, but I basically lived off of naps (I didn't sleep longer than 4 ish hours at a time). I didn't have overwhelming pain, but I definitely has surgery. I was nervous when draining the tubes of my drains bc you have to squeese out the tubes. I was scared that I was going to just pull the whole thing out. But I didn't! I think I pulled it a little once on Sunday, but they are about 1 1/2 inches in so it didnt come out at all.

I had my first post op scheduled doctor appointment at 11:00am. I recorded my drainage amount only that first day, then my doctor said I didn't have to again. Just make sure to drain them the night before my next appointment so he can see the amount when I come in to take out the tubes.

That was my first time I got to see my chest post op. Honestly, I looked exactly the same except bruised. There was SO MUCH SWELLING that I had about the same, if not even a little more boob. My doctor assured me that on the table I was completely flat and that everything was just swollen.

I was also cleared to shower! One day post op, and I could shower!

Day 2-4; Saturday-Monday:

I was draining such a small I was so happy. I didn't need to worry about dumping the drains every 12 hours exactly and actually only did it maybe once a day.

The Vicodin pain meds, I figured out, don't work at all on me. I ended up taking the oxycodone I was prescribed by the hospital instead of the Vicodin my doctor prescribed (there was a mix up and I got 2 meds for one surgery). Still, though, the oxy didn't help that much. I mainly was taking it because it made me high to forget the pain/ache and help me just sleep my way through my recovery. I still wasn't even taking it every 4 hours like I could have. Maybe like twice a day, 3 times at the most.

I showered once on Sunday because I felt like I should. I tied a string around my neck and clipped the drains to that so they wouldn't be hanging. It was weird and awkward to shower, but completely doable and having a break from the binder made my pain decrease.

Day 5; Tuesday:

I had my second post-op appointment. I think my drains drained like 1cc of fulid each side at the most. It was so minimal and I was so proud of myself haha. My doctor took the tubes out that day and I FINALLY felt like I was healing. I felt so free oh my God it was one of the most freeing experiences of my life!

Taking the tubes out didn't hurt a single bit. Like at all. I felt 0 pain whatsoever. Again, the tubes we're about 1 1/2 inches in, and there was one stich holding them in place. I was 100% numb around my chest for the most part so I barely felt my doctor's hands as he took the tube out. I heard people say getting the drains removed are sooooo painful, but idk their type of surgery and such so maybe only with lyposuction it doesn't hurt because it kills your nerves for a while?

Day 6-7; Wednesday and Thursday;

I felt so much more comfortable without the drains on. I could move so much more freely and almost all my sharp pain went away and only the dull (ish) ache of feeling like I'd been lyposuction was left. I stopped all the oxy on Wednesday, and only had some ibruprophen Wednesday and Thursday night. After that I was pain med free.

I had a gauze bandage over the drains and I didn't want to deal with changing it so I didn't shower (from Sunday) until Thursday afternoon. I felt like I should do my doctor a favor and showever before my Friday appointment. I showered, then changed my bandage into a bandaid because the holes werent draining anymore, just open.

The hospital medical surgery tape put iver my actual incision looked like it was coming off a bit in the shower and I was worried about that, but I left it alone and let it dry good and it still stuck on like it was never wet.

When I took of my shirt to take off my binder to take a shower. Oh my God! I glanced down slightly and this GIANT purple thing caught my eye. I still had my binder on so I didn't think it could have possibly been a bruise, but it was! It was around my hip (gravity sucked stuff down there) and it was about as big as my hand. With my hand over it, it was about 1/2 an inch shorter than my hand and a little bit wider. It was huge. Purple. And quite impressive. It didn't hurt at all, though, because it was just pooled old blood that was dragged down there instead of actually the place I was hurt.

Day 7; Friday:

I went to my doctor's appointment not knowing what was going to happen next. The drains were out and I didn't think I had stiches in my incision (bc of the tape) so I didn't really know what to expect.

Apparently I did have one stich in my incision, and the tape plus the stich was taken out. I was told not even to put a bandaid on and to take the bandaid off of the drain holes too.

The tape comming off hurt to be completly honest. I'm a baby when it comes to taking off baindaids and tape. I was 90% numb in that area, but it still had that feeling of pulling off sticky stuff like I was ripping my skin off. The stich came out with 0 pain. I was so surprised how thin the thread was. It looked thinner than sewing thread and it was blue which was cute. I finally got to see how big my actual incision was, and it was about 1 inch.

Day 8-13; Saturday to Thursday:

Idk, man, there's not much to say. I'm sure if I did this post and updated day by day I'd have stuff to say, but I don't. I have a fractured/severely bruised rib from the binder being so tight. Well, it's not exactly the binder, but the binder band. It hurts a lot, but I can't do anything about it anyways.

My giant bruise is getting lighter every day and everything is just healing and improving every day.

Day 14; Friday:

That's today! Well, same as the past week. Every day there's less pain and more movement ability. I didnt have much of a limitation of movement even one day post op, but I can still feel a difference. I can comfortably raise my arms above my head now and I was able to bend over to pick stuff up without much chest pain (I got joint and muscle pain anyways so it hurts, but not specifically because of top surgery lol)

I put on my old binder yesterday because the hospital one seems so loose and oh my God! How did I survive?!?! It's so tight! Even 2 weeks post op I'm shocked with how tight of a thing I wore semi comfortably before. To be fair, it was my tighter binder, but it was still not too much tighter than my normal everyday one.

I feel not compressed in my chest and Im worried that the binder isn't squishing my chest down enough. I need to keep my chest flat and squished so when it heals everything will be flat so my skin will shrink down flat instead of being baggy and like empty boobs.

~~~~~~~~

I'll try to keep this updated especially after my next appointment on Tuesday and then when I don't have to wear the binder anymore (in 2 weeks). Plus, if anything exciting happens of course I'll add that! I'll probably edit the post and reblog it so it's all together in one piece so if you see this post reblogged its been updated under the keep reading. Lies lol

#max speaks #my top surgery #my top surgery story #top surgery #post op #post-op #recovery

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monkeyradioinc · 6 years

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Post Mortem: Coin Thief

Hey guys, I made a game for my Game Development Class. This is a Post-Mortem, that states what went wrong in the team, and what went right. I put a lot of time in this game and overall im proud of it, but I believe that there are many good game design insights here

Coin Thief: Post Mortem

I learned a lot of things in the production of Coin Thief, through experiences both good and bad. Most of the things that went well went very well, and we didnt have many travesties or changes in plans. There are several things I would like to comment on in this paper highlighting the production process, everywhere from the brainstorming and idea process, to the end game completion. Some of these ideas include communication, time management, and deadlines.

One of the first brainstorming and meeting sessions during the ARTG portion of 120, I met Alex, who I connected with due to our similar vision about games. We had discussed that we had no intention of making a meme game, or further we had no intention of making a dating similar or something of the likes. I think that games should have a purpose, whether it be to amaze the player through amazing gameplay, or toy with their emotions through a narrative that shocks the world. For me I don't see any desire in making a game that ends up as something everyone laughs at, or furthermore something that 12 year old edgy teens play to get rid of their angst. I think we succeeded in planning for this goal, as we ended up making a game that was different, and played with the targeted aesthetic. Alex had told me that he liked the idea of messing with the game environment itself, which I thought we had shared, however we had two different ideas.

While Alex had meant manipulating the game environment by moving the walls around in the map, I had something much bolder on the line. I wanted to make something that goes beyond the game world, such as making a game that incites conversation amongst players who are not currently playing the game, but have something to talk about. That is why I believe communication is one of the things that I went wrong with, since I didn't successfully display my goals for the class.

Another thing that did not go directly as planned was my efficiency as an artist. During my production of Coin Thief, I somehow landed the role of artist, for the sole reason that I had done my own game art for my card game in 80G, and my team liked the look of it. While it felt like I was making progress, sometimes I felt that I was letting my group down, but i also felt that I was doing the best that I could. In the end all of the art was put in, but it took until Thursday before it was due for me to finish. This caused me to be anxious and constantly on edge in class, because while programming stuff was happening, the art department was lacking. The programmers could finish a whole mechanic, while I finished a new tile set for a new level, which turns out to be a small 128 by 128 square that does not appear as much. This also led into some more anxieties that didn't help.

I believe that I was trying to be a little too perfect in the production of Coin Thief, since I was being the sole artist. I felt that the game constantly needed to look perfect, which led to drawing out some of the art asset productions. While my team may have thought that I was just messing around doing nothing, I was tweaking the player model or wall set in order for it to look good in the actual size on the computer screen, with the lighting mode that we were working with. In the end however, this turned around and I had something I was proud of.

Getting all of the assets finally into the game was quite the radical feeling, since all of this hard work had paid off, and more importantly I had proven to my group that I hadn't just been doing nothing during the whole quarter. The game looks quite nice even though we couldn't get tiled working, and now I believe is one that shows progress and a well put together team. Though I learned that I wouldn't like the position of being the artist, getting work into a game felt great, since it felt like it was my baby, and that I could do what I want with it in order to personalize it myself.

In addition to this, we also had a good schedule of meetings. We would meet several days after 120, in my apartment just up the hill in Rachel Carson. This way we could catch up and tell each other both what we had been working on since the last meeting, but what we planned on making during the next few days, till the next week. This made it better for me, since most weekends I kind of had to sign off due to open houses, job interviews, and the like of things. We could meet up on Monday and catch each other up on the current state of the game and ask any questions to the others we may have had.

Lastly, we made a whole digital game from start to finished, that Just Works (Insert Todd Howard meme), the game does have certain bugs, but in most playthroughs the player will be able to work through it and play the game as it was intended, and gain the aesthetic goal that we started off with. This is an achievement in itself as we had never had any game development experience, and we had to figure out all of the tools, languages, and syntax that may be needed in order to make a game.

A few things that I learned that I could bring to other projects was mainly centered around the human aspect of game design. Like a sports team, a team making a game, or any project for that matter needs to work together. The artist cannot work in unison, and the programmers cannot work without the power of the artist. The work must be shared and constantly updated so that the team is on the same page, and is still creating the same game, which was apparently a risk at several points. In addition to this, I think the ability to say NO is very important. When you are overworked, and your team is pushing you to design a third level, there is no shame in saying “I am overwhelmed with this, I cannot design a whole other level in the next week, we need to work with what I have.” My girlfriend helped me in discovering this, since I would spend several nights up until very late until I was falling asleep at the keyboard. Physical health should come before work, and working yourself to exhaustion is not efficient.

Lastly, I think I realized that working on a project you enjoy is very important. Don't get me wrong, Coin Thief was amazing to produce and I am proud of it, I just think that my ambitions are a lot bolder, and will likely take a lot more time in order to produce. I know that it is a lot easier to work on a game that you are enjoying, like my endless runner, than to be working on a game that you do not like. All team members should share like ideas in most fronts, so that the game is in unison on all fronts, and can lead to a great, polished, and finished production.

If I could start this project I would definitely like to put more of my own spin on things. I'd like to make my own features, and create things that I would like to do. I had several ideas for games over the course of this year that I would like to make, and while Coin Thief is an achievement for a first game, I believe that I would like to be more ambitious in my later projects.

#game design #game development #indy games #indie #game art #video games #computer science #comp sci

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madnadidraw · 6 years

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Parents/Caregivers Take Note:

It is currently 12:15 AM at the time of me beginning to write this.

The night before this post, I tried to make a text after 11 PM (it was at 11:10 PM to be exact) and found that my phone would not send the text. I then received a text from my cellular service provider (CSP) stating that “Your phone has been restricted by the account owner. You cannot send messages until the time of day restriction ends”. The very first thing I did was screenshot it, send it to my mom (because I knew it was her that had done this), and asked if she was serious, and why? She was hoping it would help me go to bed sooner, but added that she had started it as of a week or so ago. I replied that this could only hurt my situation.

Why? Because I stay up until very late, the absolute earliest I go to bed is 2 AM and that is rare. I usually end up falling asleep at 4 AM, or I don’t sleep at all. Why? Because I have chronic nightmares that leave me waking up unable to get out of bed in time for school. Why? Because I have been through traumatic experiences, and every time I dream I relive those experiences. Just mentioning my dreams is breaking me close to a breakdown, but this post is important.

My mom is aware of all of the above information

Turning off my texting and calling abilities only meant I could not reach out to any type of mental health professionals (specifically the ones I use), usually not something I’d need, but important in a crisis. Here’s where we get to the important bit, crises. Catastrophic breakdowns. Ones that greatly inhibit my ability to do much of anything, or at least specific tasks.

It is currently 12:27 AM as I write this time-log, I have done nothing but work on this post for the past 12 minutes.

At 11:04pm I open up Snapchat, the app I use to message everybody I am relatively close to, excluding family, to respond to a text from my partner. It does not go through. I try again. Nothing. Again. Nothing. I try all kinds of social media again, and again and again. And Again Nothing Again Nothing Again Nothing Again Nothing Again Nothing Again Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. No. Thing. At all. I am locked out. Now. Now I’m in crisis. For the past hour and a half I have been riding the waves of “IM HAVING A BREAKDOWN” and “I cannot shut down I have work to do”. I have done nothing but cope for the past hour and a half, yet I am still trying to do work before I fall asleep. I am currently on my desktop, rather than a mobile device in bed, to avoid falling asleep.

It is currently 12:36 AM as I write this time-log, I have done nothing but work on this post for the past 21 minutes.

Why? Because I have a test tomorrow, a test which I have to teach myself content for due to extreme amounts of absences. A test I cannot afford to get any less than an A on, as grades close quite soon for this quarter. A quarter I cannot afford to fail (or receive less than an A on), because then I’ll be stressed for all of next quarter, because this is the only AP level or college level course that I have had an A in this year, all year. An A I promised myself I would get, because last year I constantly rode the line of a high C and a low B. I ended up getting a C first semester, and a B second semester. The C was a result of my traumatic experiences, and I promised I wouldn’t let that affect my math grade ever again, because math has always been one of my strongest classes. One of the strongest reasons I had been admitted to my dream school. Failing this test? Not an option. So, since I got home from school, finished dinner, and grounded and isolated myself (7 PM) I had been working on studying for this test. That’s four straight hours of studying, which is extremely abnormal, as I rarely do any assignments, much less studying. But at 11:04 PM that all stopped. Everything stopped. I shut down. I focused on grounding, coping, and recovering. I had had a terrible day, all day.

It is currently 12:47 AM as I write this time-log, I have done nothing but work on this post for the past 32 minutes.

Why? I had gone to bed early. So I had a nightmare. So I was uncomfortable from the start, I was ashamed, paranoid, triggered, scared, and I hated every inch of my body, but I didn’t want to be late again to first period. So I forced myself to make this a good day. It was a Wednesday. We had Friday off (Good Friday). I could get through this day. I didn’t have the ability to attend the partial hospitalization program (PHP) I attend to treat my PTSD today, because of an appointment I had been planning for months (well before I knew I would be in PHP). But I knew I would be there tomorrow, and although I usually leave school at 12:45 PM, my appointment would have me relatively excited, so it felt as though it would balance out. It didn’t.

It is currently 12:55 AM as I write this time-log, I have done nothing but work on this post for the past 40 minutes.

Assembly for seniors which pertains to the big class events, mainly Senior Prom. My friends decide to sit directly in front of The Jocks TM, people I just generally don’t get along with, but I followed because I can handle myself. Or I thought so. A group of The Jocks TM decided to boo when our principal came out to speak about senior prom. I needed as much info as possible, because I am bringing my partner to senior prom, and they attend a different school. So I am already anxious and nervous, but they’re making it worse because I can’t listen and get the info I need. And then he mentions the breathalyzers, a mandatory part of just about every prom across my state. And they boo. They’re yelling, so much so that the principal has to pause and wait. This wouldn’t be a big deal, but now I’m worried about senior prom. Now I’m worried they’re going to do their best to get absolutely wasted and I do NOT want to bring my partner into that environment. Not because I’m possessive and want to shelter them, but because prom is an expensive event that I invited them to specifically so that we could enjoy it together, even though it was expensive. I haven’t even made it to my second period yet, and my paranoia is already through the roof.

It is currently 1:04 AM as I write this time-log, I have done nothing but work on this post for the past 49 minutes.

Second period flows, I speak to some people, I calm down a bit. Then third period hits. Third period is my math class. The teacher would be out, so it was essentially a study hall. I was hoping to use it to catch up/study, but instead I’m discussing the assembly and senior prom with kids I know might have info, some, any, a fucking word idgaf, about what to expect after our principal announced the breathalyzers, I mentioned how I was bringing my partner and they attend a different school, and I didn’t want them to have that as their one and only experience with my school. Nothing. Not an ounce of anything remotely helpful. I’ve already used just about all of this period to discuss senior prom, so I decide to focus on catch up work. Nope. Not happening. Instead a group of kids sitting directly next to me start talking about a trans-girl I know, and they are saying ignorant things. Based on the conversation, I can rationally deduce they weren't being transphobic/homophobic, they just aren’t up to date with the language. But as a now extremely paranoid gay woman, hearing something remotely anti-LGBT put me into an even greater state of paranoia, and fear, because I am openly gay and they are discussing this right next to me. Finally the period ends, and I can relax into one of the two lunch periods I have (because I have a heavily reduced schedule to help cope with stress and trauma, both of which are heavily tied to the school building itself). I get through that, enter my fifth period class, acting, and finally get to my second lunch, sixth period. Sixth period I go to see my guidance counselor to continue discussing what can be done about AP physics, the class I have next period (two on lab days). The class I am currently failing. The main stressor out of all my classes. She says my dream school, the one I will attend in the fall, has not gotten back to her about dropping it/taking it as a pass fail.

It is currently 1:20 AM as I write this time-log, I have done nothing but work on this post for over an hour now. I have not left the room, gotten a drink, gotten a snack, or even stood up out of my chair in the since 11:04 PM.

No big deal, I’ll just tell my physics teacher what’s goi- “Nadia the test you were supposed to make up Friday, but haven’t been able to yet? I want you to take it now. I figured you might as well get it out of the way considering you have this period and next to work on it”

It is currently 1:25 AM as I write this time-log, I have done nothing but work on this post for 70 minutes.

Oh. Can I check my phone real quick?

Sure.

+4 new emails to your school email!

*Opens*

(From my guidance counselor): Nadia [dream school] just called, please come see me

Hey uhhhh, my guidance counselor wants to see me RIGHT now.

Really? That’s odd. I’ll call her, you get started on the test.

Oh.

I filled in random answers on the multiple choice, skipped the open ended questions, and made it look like I was working on it until the end of eighth period. I cover up the blank spaces where writing should be with the multiple choice packet, hand it into the teacher of the room I was randomly thrown into, and book it to my counselor’s office to catch her before my appointment.

It is currently 1:29 AM as I write this time-log, I have done nothing but hold back tears, ground myself, and write this post for the past 84 minutes.

They said you can’t drop it if you want to be certain you’ll be there in the fall, they want to see you get a C or above in the.....

That’s it.

That’s the last piece.

I’m broken.

Since 11:04 PM I have done nothing but try to ground myself and cope with the fact that I lost my connection to almost everything. That I will continue to lose this connection every night at 11:00 PM. That I will lose any and all electronic based or assisted coping mechanisms I may have, until after I wake up. It is currently 1:33 AM as I write this time-log, I have done nothing but work on this post for the past 89 minutes, and I have been trying to cope and ground myself for roughly two and a half hours (149 minutes).

So. Let’s recap

I have had a bad day.

After my appointment I got home and began studying for my test at 7 PM

At 11:04 PM I had a break down, and have been trying to cope and ground myself since.

I have not finished studying yet, and I intend to stay up, rather than try to sleep earlier, to finish doing so.

The test I was and will be studying for, whether this is true or not, feel as though it will decide where I spend the next year of my life.

Now for the obvious question:

How could this have been avoided?

Am I asking for my mom to not have turned off service for my phone? No. She had already turned off texting, this was the obvious next step.

Now my answer, my main take away for parents and caregivers.

Talk to your kids.

Talk to your kids about punishments you intend to use, whether they’ve done something wrong or not, so that you can be sure it won’t break them.

Talk to your kids.

Talk to your kids about what you expect from them, ask them to honestly tell you what their limits are, even if they conflict with these expectations.

But most of all.

Talk to your kids.

Talk to your kids when you’re trying to help them, make sure your proposed solution or support does not end up hurting them. If my mom had told me about this, even at 10:59 PM, a minute before it would take place, this break down could have been avoided.

RECOGNIZE THAT YOU DO NOT ALWAYS KNOW BEST

Parents and caregivers; if you expect your kids (or those receiving your care) to trust you? To respect you? To be honest with you?

TRUST THEM FIRST

If you always assume that you and you alone know what’s best for your kids, that you alone know how to best support them and reprimand them.

You need to recognize that kids are still people and can speak for themselves.

I am 18 years old, I am not asking you to start talking to your one month old as if they are in high school. I am asking you to give us the respect that you think you deserve. The fact that...

...It is currently 1:46 AM (14 minutes before the earliest time I fall asleep) as I am writing this time-log, I have been trying to cope and ground myself for 162 minutes, and working on this post for 102 minutes...

...should be message enough that assuming you know best, does not work.

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janetoryim · 7 years

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Word’s out: I’ve committed to attending Yale University in the fall to pursue my Master in Public Health!!!

TEXAS FOREVER

For anyone who talked to me during the process, you know how anxious I felt throughout the whole process.

DISCLAIMER: ANOTHER LONG POST SORRY WILL EDIT LATER

// GRE, APPLYING, DOUBTS //

Back in October, I had a life crisis/mental breakdown and finally committed to pursuing graduate school instead of medical school. It took a lot of humility and sacrifice to give up on a dream that I had for so long. People kept asking, “Well, why didn’t you just apply to med school? Why give up before you get a no?” (background: I completely switched. Like I no longer desire to become a physician.) // READ MORE ABOUT THAT TIME HERE!

Throughout the whole process of applying to grad school, I faced a lot of doubt: what if I should have just applied to med school? What if I go into public health and have a rude awakening that I hate it? What if I don’t get in anywhere? How will I do on the GRE?

I felt really anxious because all of my close friends were getting full time job offers that they really wanted & they knew where they were going to live geographically the next year. But there I was, just figuring out my life, in the middle of first semester of my senior year of college.

And so literally a month after I decided to switch to this life path, I took the GRE on November 16th and started my first week at my new part time job, and two weeks after that on Dec 1st, I had applied to my first three programs. By December 31st, I finished applying to all 8 programs, all out of the state, struggled to finish my senior thesis, and had some personal stuff to deal with. That season was absolute madness.

The doubts didn’t stop. More than half of the programs I was interested in required a minimum of 2 years, public-health related work experience, so I couldn’t even apply to a lot of programs. And once I submitted and paid for my applications, I realized that some of my “back-up” choices were actually really prestigious. For example, I applied to one of the best health policy programs (George Washington University) as a back-up, but when I heard that it’s one of the best I began considering if I should apply to other programs, like UT/A&M.

But God is just so incredibly faithful.

With my GRE, I spent half a week in Houston to “study” for it, but really I just hung out with people. I walked into that exam not even knowing the format of the exam tbh. You basically get your scores right away (except for the writing portion), and once those numbers popped up, I stared at the screen for a long while because I performed a lot better than I expected. A couple of weeks later, I got my writing score, scoring in the top 7% of the nation on that portion of the exam. (HAHA THANK YOU, UT COLLEGE OF LIBERAL ARTS. I guess all of those incredibly lengthy literary reviews and thesis papers paid off?)

And less than a week after I applied to GWU (the health policy program I mentioned), they gave me my first acceptance!

I couldn’t believe it. I remember the overwhelming joy that took away my doubts. It confirmed that I was, in fact, going somewhere, and that I made the right decision to choose public health. I messaged so many people, and I felt so supported as my friends and family celebrated with me. More than those things, though, I heard a strong voice of the Lord telling me,

“Janet, have peace. Do you not trust me? Didn’t you say that you knew that switching to PH was from me? Why do you doubt? Why are you worried? I am the Lord. I am faithful. Believe that I am who I say that I am.”

// THE ADMISSIONS PROCESS, DECISIONS, DECISIONS, DECISIONS //

As time went on, I God proved faithful again and again.

At one point, I considered applying for a joint degree at Yale to get my MPH and my M. Div (Master of Divinity, a professional ministry degree). I emailed and later called the Director of Admissions to talk about it, and she was so excited for my passion for public health and my desire to understand God’s heart for the field! Though I ultimately ended up not applying for the joint degree, the Director of Admissions continued to follow up with me and even sent me personal emails to congratulate me on my acceptance and to give me contact information of others in the joint degree, just in case I wanted to talk to them!

And then I was invited to interview for UPenn, my dream undergrad school during a conference I was attending LOL. A week later, I got my second acceptance. There’s a really long story behind this one, but this acceptance led to a lot of greater things and emotional healing regarding my family, in ways that I didn’t even know I needed healing.

I then received my acceptance to Boston University, another top 10 program, and they also gave me a $20,000 merit scholarship!!

As I received these acceptances, I grew more and more selfish and ambitious. I joined this forum that in which a bunch of people posted their stats & their acceptances/timelines of their decision. I began comparing myself to them. The newness of the acceptances wore off, and honestly, I became really impatient. At this point, I had heard back from all of my “backup” programs and was waiting on the “dream schools”. The most commonly used phrase that came out of my mouth was, “I just wanna knowwwww.” (To my friends: IM SO SORRY. I was so annoying but thank you so much for staying patient and walking me through this journey ugh im so lucky wow.) I stopped praying, I stopped thanking God. Instead of praying, “God just lead me to where you want me,” I prayed, “God, just give me an answer.” “God, why is it taking so long? I just wanna know where I’ll be next year.”

I hated it. I constantly felt so impatient, anxious. This pit in my stomach never just got bigger and bigger. I constantly checked my email. literally. every. 5. minutes. Each day felt so painstakingly long.

A couple weeks later, it happened. I got into Yale!!! I literally dropped my phone outside of CLA after class. I told EVERYONE. My parents almost didn’t believe me. I got so excited I LEGIT DELETED THE EMAIL. I Googled how to un-archive emails on my phone HAHA. Imagine getting the email, deleting it, refreshing your inbox, and then it not being there?? I honestly thought I was just imagining things.

About a week after that, I got into Columbia University’s Mailman School of Public Health, one of the best programs. Then, I got into the one that I thought was impossible: The Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health. Literally ranked #1, and has been for decades.

I couldn’t believe it.

But life is just so twisted. As I received these acceptances from literally the TOP ranked programs in the nation, and possibly the world, I didn’t thank God, the only One who made it possible. Like y’all. I had a 3.2 GPA when I applied. I didn’t deserve it. I really didn’t.

Then I started to feel guilt. I felt as though I should have trusted God a lot more in the process. I should have prayed not only at the beginning of this whole adventure, but throughout. At that point, I felt just so spiritually dry and far away that more than excitement and worship, my response was pure guilt. And I knew that this guilt was not from the Lord. It just got worse when I realized that it affected my personal life–my friendships, my ministry, my discipleships.

[[Eventually, I heard back from Brown and Harvard, which I didn’t get into. But honestly that’s totally ok because it made the decision-making process so much easier.]]

// ADMITTED STUDENT DAY VISITS //

So because I wasn’t seeking God for clarity, I visited three programs for their Admitted Student Days: Columbia, Johns Hopkins, and Yale.

Super brief, but those visits gave me a lot of clarity. At Columbia, I realized that it was an amazing program, but not for me. I felt very affirmed though and was really glad that my brother’s there for his MPH.

For JH, I came in thinking that I would hate it, mainly because of the stereotypes that I had: that JH was full of competitive people who only cared about research. Long story short, I ended up loving it and getting to spend time with my best friend while I was there. I really really enjoyed the visit, and basically made the decision to attend in the fall.

But something kept me wanting to visit Yale. Maybe it was b/c I just wanted to get out of UT. Maybe it was the Ivy League name. Maybe it was b/c it gave me another opportunity to visit brudder Yim. Regardless, my parents didn’t think I needed to visit b/c it seemed like I was just so set on Hopkins.

But God really wanted me to visit Yale.

A couple of people know this, but I literally almost missed my flight for that visit. The boarding time was at 8:20AM, BUT I WOKE UP AT 8AM???? UM HELLO IM A MESS. I sped down I35 and got to the gate by 8:30, before my boarding group was even called up HAHA. Thank God I woke up and that I didn’t run into anyone or anything and that no police were around omg.

Overall, this visit made me super torn between JH and Yale, so I came in wanting clarity, but came back more of a mess than when I left. And let’s be real: I was SUCH a mess when I left HAHA.

// DECISIONS AND COMMITTING //

And so literally on the plane back, I started this extremely crazy excel file, comparing course schedules of the two, weighing pros and cons, planning out my 2 year plan at both. I spent the next couple of days perusing the websites for both and figuring out what I would get involved in. I stalked literally hundreds of people on LinkedIn to gauge what the future could look life for me if I went to either institution.

Run-down of each:

Both

Small cohorts (15-20 at JHU, ~25(?) at Yale)

Financially about the same

Baltimore & New Haven felt similar to me tbh

Grad student ministries

JHU:

Baltimore, proximity to D.C. Really interesting place to study populations.

Lots of parks nearby, campus next to the harbor

Hipster and cool vibes

#1 program

Curriculum super rigid, but I would enjoy basically every class in my proposed 2 year plan LOL

THE leading public health institution in the world

Endless opportunities to work with the leading public health professionals, whose office is probably just down the hallway

75% tuition cut the second year

Very hands on/practical courses

2 internship opportunities: one domestically in the summer, 1 internationally in the fall (can carry over to the spring)

I already know of pastors and other contacts that could help me grow spiritually

INTENSE courseload: 18-22 credits per QUARTER omg

I would grow a lot as a student and in time management/discipline here. I would be trained as a highly effective public health professional in basically any field.

Yale

More theoretical/research-focused courses

BUT I get to take any course from the entire University. Like I could take Systematic Theology from the Divinity School, I could take classes from the #7 business school in the nation, the #1 law school in the world.

Flexible curriculum

More established connections with organizations around the country/world, but not necessarily in PH

Access to the Yale network, not just the YSPH network

Only 1 internship opportunity (summer)

50% off of tuition through scholarship/grants

No prior knowledge of churches/personal contacts in the area that would help me grow spiritually

Honestly, I had all of the facts. I had all of the answers. But at the end of the day, I felt like I was comparing apples to oranges, and I felt paralyzed because I was afraid of making the wrong decision.

But one of my friends put it well: When I weighed the pros and cons, they were about equal. I just needed to figure out what I wanted, and to commit.

I finally began to seriously seek the Lord and His heart for this time. I heard a voice loud and clear saying,

“Janet, more than the right/wrong decision, I want you to remain full of joy and worship in the process.”

And that’s exactly what I needed to hear. I was letting fear cripple me from making a decision–fear of the JHU curriculum, fear of lack of job prospects if I don’t go to JHU, fear of moving away, etc. etc. etc.

And as others prayed for me and listened to me, God covered me with this immense sense of peace that put me in a place to listen intently to His voice and His alone.

Once I sought out God’s heart, the decision was so easy. I began to realize that with JHU, there are SO many perks. Like why wouldn’t I go?? It’s #1! But I would go for very selfish reasons–to simply further my own career, to grow as a student, to more easily fulfill my dreams and ambitions. But with Yale, I was already thinking of ways I can start outreaching to my fellow classmates/professors/the community. I had a Kingdom mindset already. That was the biggest indicator for my commitment. I also started to see that maybe not having many contacts there would be better for my own faith–to become more independent, and seek growth and Truth individually. And I know that I’ll continue to have a community from back home that will keep me accountable with this.

How people think I feel about leaving UT

How I actually feel

—

Most people probably may think that I made the *wrong* choice. But I don’t. I’m definitely not saying that Yale is a terrible program. It’s amazing. And I’m so so SO incredibly blessed and humbled to be able to attend–with financial help! But What I’m trying to hone in on is that my life is not my own. I serve a God who is so faithful when I am far from it. I am loved by the Father who lays everything out in front of me and blesses me when I least deserve it, even when I turn my back on Him. I worship the Gracious Redeemer who blesses even my mistakes. I follow the Lord who calls me to things bigger and better than myself, One who uses a broken vessel like me for His glory.

As I meditate on what God has planned for me in this upcoming life stage which seems so far away right now, I hope you will meditate with me on this passage:

“Be strong and courageous, for you shall cause this people to inherit the land that I swore to their fathers to give them. Only be strong and very courageous, being careful to do according to all the law that Moses my servant commanded you. Do not turn from it to the right hand or to the left, that you may have good success wherever you go. This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” -Joshua 1:6-9

So friends, if you got to this point, thank you so much. I just kind of word-vomitted for an hour haha. Special shoutout to the friends that walked me through this whole journey: Christina for trying to listen as we worked out every TTH, Charlotte for always encouraging me and listening to me rant, Alyssa for your caring heart, Andrew for walking with me and being able to empathize as we journeyed through decisions together, Ethan for your insight and analyzing mind, the prayer warriors who at Luke 4:18 ministries, Lina/Jenny/Vicki/Bianca who listened to me during discipleship even if we didn’t get to read the Bible/pray as much together, and the Pastors (PG, P. Art, Pastor Steve) who texted and FB messaged me and prayed for me and asked me for updates. And anyone else I forgot to mention!! Really you are all so special and made me feel so supported and loved and cared for throughout this whole intense journey. Thank you for being in my life, and I hope that we will continue journeying through this mess called life together with joy and in worship! (:

Ok but before I leave I gotta graduate please pray that I pass all of my classes LOL

When You Give Up #1 for #14 Word's out: I've committed to attending Yale University in the fall to pursue my Master in Public Health!!!

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talesofgrace · 5 years

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I’m on the flight home from Ibiza to Liverpool and this flight couldn’t be any more opposite to the one going. Everyone is pretty much done in and I must admit I’m no different. I’ve just spend a week in Ibiza the difference for me this this time is that I traveled as a solo traveler, not knowing anyone and with no real plan only thing I wanted to do was see Camelphat at Hii (they didn’t disappoint but we’ll get to that on another post).

I know Ive harped on about this before but as fun as being single is its hard sometimes when you want to do stuff and there’s no-one to do it with, be it gigs, walks or holidays. Ibiza is always somewhere I’ve wanted to go but no-one else has really wanted to go there. over the past few years I’ve muted the idea that I’d go on my own but I checked out and people laughed at me. last year was the first year I’ve been and it didn’t disappoint I was able to go with my sister and cousin and we had a ball. This year we planned to do the same again but one thing or another cropped up, life got in the way and no-one else was able to come. So after years of talking about going on my own I decided just to take the plunge.

This little post is about the general trip and little tips I picked up from people and what’s on offer for solo travellers. Im going to write one about the places we went separately, mainly for my memory so I don’t forget what went on!

Now Ibiza isn’t somewhere i though that people head by themselves unlike places like mainland Europe, Thailand backpacking or Australia but let me tell you I couldn’t of been more wrong. Soooooo very wrong!!! Yes there are huge groups of people on lads lads lads holidays, hen doos, stags doos and little groups of people with their mates but I found there was equally as many people on their own too. To make sure I was stalked at sorry safe at every step of the way my beautiful little friends added me on find a friend. My mum as sister all ready stalk sorry I mean have me on there (I often forget this and my mum will ring asking how the motorway traffic is and ill be super confused but she’ll inform me that she checked the app before ringing.)

After a little bit of googling I managed to find a Facebook group of people that were heading out on their own and I also joined a few workers groups on Facebook too to see about cheap places to stay and things to do that wasn’t just clubbing (I know, I know what can I say Im cultured too). This started to give me a little bit of confidence that I wasn’t a total loon doing this and it was something people did.

I was torn about where to stay. I couldn’t find any hotel rooms for just 1 person and any that I could were so expensive and I really didn’t have the money for it. I ended up finding a hostel in San Antonio called Amistat. I’ve only ever stayed in a hostel once and that was with 5 other mates so it wasn’t bad but this was a week with 5 other strangers. However after a few reads of reviews and chatting to people on the FB I decided to book it. There are different rooms you can have a 10 bed mixed dorm for £12.65 a night, single sex female dorm with ensuite for £21 a night. They also do private rooms for 2 people that are ensuites for £75 a night. I opted for a female dorm facing the pool with breakfast included (although I only made it out of bed once for breakfast) I though “ah fuck it” (that phrase came up a few times this week). On reflection I wouldn’t get the breakfast again and save myself €6 a day and just use the lovely cafe called Cafe Hunza that’s opposite instead. The only thing I wasn’t sold on was the green pool. The colour was just a little uninviting. They did have a schedule things that the hostel were organising however we didn’t go on any of those and due to the shite weather that was forecast (bloody rain in Ibiza) a lot of stuff was cancelled in advance.

view from balcony

green pool….

Speaking of weather in Ibiza. One thing I did learn was that never trust the weather report. It changes literally by the second. At one point I was looking at the weather and it was saying it was raining for the next 6 hours however I was outside and I could see the moon. Not a cloud in the sky. But when it rained. It really rained. Thunder lightning and flooding in the streets. But even when it rains on Ibiza it’s still better than a night back home. I’m from up north, weather doesn’t stop us going out. We just adapt.

So back to the Facebook group. Someone on there had created a WhatsApp group for everyone that was going and I got added to that. I’d never felt as popular in my life my phone was pinging constantly. From that a few people who were there the same dates as me set up another WhatsApp group and started to plan our week about what wanted to see what where. While this was happening I made a friend on the internet (don’t worry she was an actual real person) who was staying in the same hostel and coming out and leaving on the same day! Winner winner chicken dinner. And it turns out she was bloody lovely and such a good laugh too. [Hayley you helped to make a awesome week even more awesome.] we also made another friend off the internet who was over 30 too Andy. And just like that we became the Brit’s abroad.

Up cropped another WhatsApp group for guest list entries which gave you a heads up as to where you could get in for a little cheaper. This came in very handy indeed!!

As I was trying to save as much money as possible I used the buses wherever I could or shared a taxi with other people. The buses are actually really good and run all through the night. The bus station was super close to the hostel (10 min walk) and the disco bus took you to pretty much all the places you wanted to go and also took you home. It for a bit crowded at times and it was a bit sweaty but the tunes and atmosphere on it was pretty much the same as this flight – bouncing on the way out and everyone passed out on the way home.

I think I actually lucked out a bit with the hostel because it was only full on the first day and the last day too. For the rest of it there was only me and Linda in there which was pretty good!

Depending where you eat over there will depend on how much you spend. Cafe Mambo actually in the day time is quite reasonable for very good portions but if you found little local cafes you could get a coffee for €1.60 and a breakfast for €5. The other thing we were doing to save money was getting food from the supermarket and storing it in the kitchen of the hostel. The only issue with that was it’s not open all the time. The first night on our way home we went in search of a kebab place and took a wrong turn and stumble upon a late night supermarket we ended up getting mini cheddar and a soggy baguette. I didn’t actually eat it I passed out and woke up cradling it with one bite missing from it!!

We pre drank every day and when the drinks are €20 each it’s pretty much the only way. Some places do drinks packages which do work out ok and once or twice we split this between 2 because there was no way we were drinking 6 drinks in on sitting when we had to make sure we got to the next place on the agenda.

The hostel check out was 11am and my flight home wasn’t until 2040 so I made use of the lockers and went for a wander. I got the bus to Ibiza town and went for an explore and then hopped on a bus to Playa d’en Bossa for another mooch. I found a place that I could store my case and bag in and they also did showers for a freshen up. I was as happy as a pig in shite about that bit cause I was bloody roasting and needed to cool down before heading to the airport. That cost €26 and Linda told me what she did last time was had an early flight and her mates were in Ushuaïa so instead of checking in and heading back she went there dumped the bags had a shower and went out. Turns out this is pretty standard. Again also very ducking handy it’s cheaper and quicker than paying for a taxi back and too.

So the cost overall was

£65 for flights

£151 for accommodation

I used £900 for spends which when you say it sounds a lot however an entry to a club ranges from €20-€60 depending where you go and we went to and we went to 9 different places in total that we had to pay on the door for which is about €300 just for getting into places.

I can honestly stay I’ve had the best time ever. And this has spurred me on more to do more things on my own. I’m already thinking about where I can go next for a little weekend away. It’ll be the place with the cheapest flight and a few hostels. I’m not letting being on my own stop me from doing anything again.

I actually have a ticket for The Amsterdam Music Festival in October but due to a lack of funds I highly doubt I’ll be going unfortunately. That will have to wait until next year I think. Unless I come into some money between now and then….Ill just have my own little rave instead

Ibiza solo style I’m on the flight home from Ibiza to Liverpool and this flight couldn’t be any more opposite to the one going.

#adventure #dance #explore #friends #fun #hostal #Ibiza #life #mental health #music #self #single #solo #solo travel #sun #travel

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optimisticpoetrypost-blog · 6 years

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I need health insurance. Most assitance i dont qualify for but work doesnt offer and i cant afford just any insurance. Any ideas?

Got a ticket for 30 over and have American Fam. Ins. 1st speeding ticket. Any insight on rate increase?

Aim a 23 year old male & this is my first ticket for speeding technically (I got a ticket 6 years ago for speeding but it was dismissed in court). I also totaled a car 7 years ago but that seems to be irrelevant now (I would think). I was sighted for going 75 MPH in a 45 MPH on interstate 670 in Columbus, Ohio (45 due to construction not in progress so fine was not doubled). The office stated to me that the traffic flow was moving well above the posted speed limit however I was moving a bit faster than the flow. My first question is should I take this to court and fight it (also hope the officer does not show) If the traffic flow was moving considerably over the posted limit then why wasnt any of the people ahead of my pulled over? Does anyone think this will stand in court or do you think the fact that I was going 30 over pretty much kill my defense? Also (since I believe I will have to pay) how much do you think my insurance rates will increase? Like I said I am a 23 year old male with 1 prior speeding ticket that was dismissed in court 6 years ago, totaled a car 7 years ago and received a ticket almost 3 years ago for peeling and squealing (which was BS). Any insight is helpful and thank you all for taking time to read my post and respond it means a lot.""

What's the best deals on auto insurance?

What's the cheapest I can get car insurance for at 18?

I really want a car, but I don't know if I should wait it out, until I'm 20 and really need it. Right now, it's not a necessity, but it would help a lot. Should I just wait it out, or is there any way insurance is cheaper for an 18 year old?""

Is insurance expensive for this car? [1st time driver]?

http://www.scion.com/#tCColors Its a Scion Tc, and im thinking about getting it for my bday, is it good on gas and such? or easy to drive?, and is the insurance expensive on this car, i know its already expensive for teen drivers but does this car make it more expensive than a regular honda civic or cheaper smaller car a 16 yr old would usually get???""

Does Everybody Have Car INsurance?

Not having it is against the law #1 and #2 very dangerous. I had a friend who didn't have insurance and got in an accident and had to pay $20K in hospital bills.

I think my short term disability due to giving birth got messed up?

So I want on leave on May 20th due to best rest. I used all my vacation and leftover sick time, and the rest is paid by short term disability, a total of about 9 weeks total. I stayed home 6 weeks after my baby was born since my work doesn't cover any of my pay. I work in a very small private business, just 3 of us. My boss had never handled maternity leave before, and I think he did it wrong. A few weeks after I gave birth he said he got a check from the disability insurance agency, it was made out to his business. So he cashed it and wrote me a check for the total amount from his business account. There was no explanation of how to dole it out, so he just gave me the total amount. Then, just now, 3 weeks later, I got another check mailed to my home from the insurance company?? What happened? I should of only got paid for the 3.5 weeks I believe from short term disability because I was paid for the rest. The insurance company is not open until tomorrow so I cannot call them yet.""

How do you find an insurance quote for a car you may get?

I am looking to trade my Car, which is just a Sedan for what would be considered as a sports car. The car is older, but I'm certain the price will go up because of the fact of it being a sports car, I can't find anywhere that will give me a quote on what to expect insurance price wise if I were to complete the trade. Does anyone know of a place to find this out? I am trading a 2003 Ford Taurus SES for a 1997 Mitsubishi Spyder Eclipse GST Convertible""

Should I buy insurance for my dog?

My brother keeps insisting that I purchase pet insurance for my dog mainly because he sells It and wants a commission. But is pet insurance really essential?

Can someone explain how car insurance works?

Specifically, how do you pay for auto insurance? Do you make monthly payments or do you pay it at one time?""

Health insurance question about coverage under age 26 while married? HELP?

Im currently age 22 and on my mothers health care plan and scheduled to get married in October. My question is, will I still be covered on my mothers insurance plan if my future spous has a form of employer insurance that i could be on. This would however kill her monthly take home pay. Shed make 300$ a month for full time job Im self employed and have NO Employer-based insurance opportunities and will still be 22 when married. So when i get married will i be kicked off my mothers insurance because i have the potential to be on my spouses insurance plan? This Affordable Care act law is somewhat vague on this topic""

Is there any way you can cheat on getting lower car insurance?

23/ single/ brand new car...and my parents just booted me out of there policy :-( HELP!!

Auto Insurance Rates?

So, I got into an accident a year ago in June when I was 17 so I have 2 points on my record, I was declared at fault, which was bullsh*t btw, but I haven't driven since and I'll be 19 soon in June. I'm looking for a car now because I really need it to get to school. I will be under my parents account and will get liability coverage, generally how much higher will insurance rates be (by %) in CA for me? Intelligent answers only thanks.""

""California to nevada, is insurance more?""

moving to nevada, is auto insurance more from CA to NV?""

Financing a car & insurance?

I'm 21 and I'm located in NYC the insurance over here is sky rocket high. I paid 1600+ for liability insurance for a old lexus from GEICO. I am asking my uncle to help me finance a 2006 bmw 530i which is about 32k and I already check if I finance under my name how much it would be. It is 10k for insurance a year lol... So I want to know if my uncle finance the car for me and I make the payments does he have to add my name under the insurance ? I don't need my name to be the co signer. I just want to know incase I do get into an accident what will happen ? Most people use their parent's insurance so I just want to make sure and get some facts before I ask my uncle. Thanks

Health Insurance for Newborn baby?

I get health insurance through my job but I think I can get a better quote than what they offer if I go about it independently. What suggestions do you all have in terms of a good health insurance coverage? Is it best to have a higher deductible and lower premium or vice versa for a newborn? I want what will be the best for him but the most affordable for us. Thanks! :)

Car Insurance for a new driver?

I've been searching compare sites for a couple of days now having very recently passed my test (yay ). The best quote I have at the moment is 4,500. I have no convictions on my license and at 21 years old, I'm finding this pretty hard to believe. Surely something is wrong? On my mothers insurance (9 years no claims) I'm getting a quote, as an additional driver, at 2,500. Still pretty pricey wouldn't you agree? I'd love for some comments on this, I'm getting rather annoyed! Thanks.""

Classic / antique auto insurance in ny cheap?

Im looking to get cheap classic auto insurance. for a car thats more than 25 years old. Its going to be a show car, and rarely be driven. Liability only. I live in NY, so company must be available in NY, and be cheap. Thanks.""

How can i get temporary car insurance in the UK?

my brothers not going to be using his car for the next month and i want to know how i can get insurance cover for a few weeks or maybe a month. my brother in law got it on my dads car so he could use it for a while but im not sure how to go about it. can i do it through his insurance and how much roughly would it cost? thanks

How can i move and keep my old states insurance??

I plan to move to Ny and i got a quote from my car insurance company and it is ridiculously high. Is there a way to keep my insurance without changing it to where i plan to move to?

How much should it cost to insure a new teen driver?

I'm 16 and my parents just put me on their insurance. I have 2000 escort and I have the basic liability coverage. I have got the good student discount too. The total came to be about $53 dollars. Is that about the average? My parents originally said it would be about $100 dollars.

80's Monte Carlo Insurance cost?

Considering buying a Chevy Monte Carlo from the mid 80's, I know that early muscle cars have very high insurance cost, while an average cheap 80's car has a cheap insurance cost. The Monte Carlo is somewhere in between these two depending on how you view it, so should I expect 69 Camaro insurance prices or 88 Civic prices?""

Insurance on a 92 Vtec honda prelude?

approx. what would insurance on a 92 Vtec Honda prelude be for a Canadian 17 year old guy with with a successfully drivers education course completed? and if possible what would be the cheapest place to go for my insurance?

""1994 Mazda MX-3, How much would insurance cost for it!?""

So I got a 94 Mazda mx-3 car, and I live in Calgary AB. And i'm 16, could anybody give me a estimate on how much registration, insurance, ect, would cost?""

I have three speeding tickets in the last 6 months will my rates sky rocket?

I got my first in December of 2007, and went to traffic school. Since then, i got a speeding ticket in april and just got one this morning - i have allstate insurance - will my rates skyrocket? is there any way to call them and avoid this? what should i do?""

car insurance for 17 year old new drivers

Is California more expensive because of too many people...?

And not enough properties? Or is it expensive because of high insurance because it's in an earthquake zone, or is it expensive because of high taxes? What is it EXACTLY that makes California expensive? I count other cities beside L.A. too.""

How to Find Quickly Best Term Life Insurance Quote?

Bankruptcy and life insurance?

I have plain old life insurance with my husband as beneficiary. Do I have to cancel life insurance if I file bankruptcy? I want to have this for security for my husband and five children should anything ever happen to me. It has no cash value.

Insurance for Pregnant Women?

hello does anyone know where I can find a low cost insurance that covers everything for pregnant women including doctor visits & delivery,,,in Southern California. Discard Medi-Cal & AIM, since i dont qualify :(""

Motorcycle insurance depending on class of bike?

What are the types of bikes? I was told Sport Touring, Sport, Super Sport, and Cruisers? I was told insurance is cheap on Ninja 650r's, sv650's, and Ducati monsters. However it is really expensive on super sports like zx6's, cbr, r6, gsxr, and so on. If I get a older bike like 2002 or older zx6/cbr/r6/gsxr will the insurance be as expensive as a 2010 sx6/cbr/r6/gsxr? Or will it be around the cost of a 650r/sv650 etc...thanks.""

Health insurance for kids 18 and older?

Hello. Im searching for health insurance for my daughter who will be 18 in about a year and half. We are both from California. Does anyone know of any coverage that can help that dont cost an arm and a leg...I dont have much money, and my insurance will only will cover her till shes 18. I just dont want her to be with out medical help when her 18 bday comes. Thanks for your help and please be nice.""

Need a car-but how much is the insurance?

I'm 25, female and haven't even got a provisional, never had a lesson, live in salford want a car, could only afford one for 600 pound second hand, does anyone have any idea how much my insurance would be about ?""

Life insurance at 25 years of age.?

I am twenty five and would like to put my mom in life insurance. Is this possible and what would I have to do to put her in life insurance?

What would my approximate Auto Insurance rates be with a motorcycle?

I know no one can say exactly what my rate would be, but if I could get a ball park figure, that would be great. I live in Lakeland, Florida. I'm have State Farm, have never been ticketed for anything, get the steer-clear and good grades discounts. I am currently on my mom's plan. I would either stay on her plan with the motorcycle as my only personal vehicle, or would have my own car and my bike. I will take the MSF course before getting my license. I will be 20 when I get my bike. I would be getting a 250cc bike to learn on, and probably trading up for a 600cc later. Where would my rates fall for a 250cc bike and a 600cc bike? I would be listed as a primary driver on my mom's plan. I know insurance is full of variables, but if anyone could possibly give me any ballpark figure, I'd appreciate it! Thanks""

What are some affordable model of cars to insure?

I will be purchasing my first car in a few months. I need something safe and reliable, as well because I have two small children. What model of car would you recommend?""

""Car Insurance, will it go up IF?""

Right.. well im gonna be able to drive the end of this year.. and i want to get a Vauxhall Astra Estate and make a few changes.. for Example: GSI front bumper Exhuast GSI alloy wheels possibly a new spray of paint leather seats new head lights Will the insurance go up if i do these things? i know its going to be high anyway because im a new driver.. but i wanna know if it will go up anymore and roughly by how much, and if anyone could just give me a general list of things i have to tell the insurance company if i change anything on the vehicle. Thanks!""

""The most basic and cheapest insurance available, forget what it's called?""

There's a type of insurance for mostly minors or people who deal with used cars that are cheap etc, rarely driven, traded often, and it's called ______ I forget, and it only entitles you to be insured against law suits if the other person is injured. Real crappy insurance right? I'm starting to trade cars but some will need to be driven to shops and stuff like that. In my state MICHIGAN, you need to have insurance BEFORE you register, which sucks for me. For example, I am about to buy a piece of crap 500 dollar Chevy Cavalier and I need to most basic insurance, I just forget the term for this. I don't want to get a huge big policy for a car that will be driven probably less then 50 miles in it's time that I have it.""

How can I find out previous years car insurance providers?

How can I find out who has provided my car insurance for the previous 5 years. I tend to change them regularly, is there anywhere which keeps a record?""

How to get health insurance for a pregnant woman in California that is a LEGAL immigrant?

Ok, my fiancee is pregnant. She's a legal resident, but from what I understand, she isn't supposed to use any type of public benefits (aka welfare) and we really don't want to either. I have company health care (HMO), but my company won't pay for her, and for me to add her onto my plan is like $900 more a month (IT IS INSANE!!!!!). She doesn't work as she is a stay at home mom. We are not married, but we were planning on an October wedding before she found out she was pregnant (7 weeks), I imagine we are still going to stick to our plans. How can we have this baby? I make $36,000 and live in San Diego. This would be our 2nd child, I can barely make ends meet. Before you judge me about having another kid without the true financial means, she was on birth control for 2 years. We don't know how this happened, but I guess it's not true 100% protection. Are there any insurances we can get? How can we get help with this baby? What can we do? Thank you for your help.""

How much will my car insurance go up?

I already pay $270 a month for car insurance for my truck. If I were to buy a 1992 Jeep Wrangler, how much more will it go up?""

What are some good Business insurance in California?

I opened up a business and i need insurance and I'm looking for a good one with a reasonable price with workers comp and liability I live in California south bay got any you recommend?

""Were and how I can get car insurance in Europe for my american car, and how much is that( annually)?""

I would like to drive my car all over the Europe, but were I can obtail insurance ( green card ) for EU""

What would be a rough estimate on a monthly insurance price for and 18 yr old kid with a '12 motorcycle?

I have no previous accidents or anything But I want a new ninja. Just a ballpark if you can

How much will car insurance cost?

I want a 2002 toyota Celica and a suv like 2003 escalade Im 15 now but when I get my license I'm going on my mom insurance but I have to pay the bill how much

""Ford Crown Victoria Insurance, and Gas cost?""

For you crown vic owners, I want to buy a 2001 Crown Victoria. Is it a real gas eater or what? How much do you think the inssurance would be for a 18 yrs old men? I like them crown vics, except when it comes time to be in the back of them in handcuffs.""

Car insurance quote help.?

So this is personal, but I'm going to be emancipated soon or at least when I turn 18, and I'm going to be living in my car or possibly renting at a friends house for around $100. I'm not made of money, I only have a weekend part time job and another one possibly soon. I'm a full time high school student with a GPA of 2.6 and I'll turn 18 in November. I know that my GPA isn't stellar but last semester I made a 4.0 and this semester I'll have at least a 3.4. I can't get a STUPID QUOTE because I'm not 18 yet and I tried fibbing my age, but it was wise to me and shut me out anyway. I live in Marietta, GA (Cobb County), and I drive a 2000 Buick regal. If someone could run a quote for me I would be sooo greatful. Also, do you have to have an address to put down like a house to have car insurance? Thanks!""

""Car Insurance - 18 Year old added as a driver to parents car Insurance cost, high?""

My mum who doesn't drive very much is considering selling her crappy car which is probably gonna fail the MOT. But since I have a reasonably good paying job at 18, I thought, may as well spilt on a car, get something I want and will maintain, and she can use it as long as long as part of the insurance is paid off. So my mum pays around 50 a Month on a Daewoo (very small and crap car, 1.0L) I have a motorbike, so experienced on the road (could count towards a discount), but only got my driving license fully a week ago, passed with flying colours. So my mum with like 4 years no claims, and an 18 year old on a Subaru Impreza? What you reckon?""

""Just bought a used car, can he temporarily get away with liability insurance?""

My friend just bought a used car (2004) with a loan, of course they want full coverage insurance but the quote from progressive was outrageous. He can't pay it this month, but says he can budget it in for next month since he took on a 2nd, part time job. He wants to call another company and get liability insurance on it, at least for a month, is that possible? I know they run the car information pretty quickly, but what could they do?""

What kind of motorcycle should I get? Is insurance expensive?

I recently got a job about an hour away and would like to make my commute cheaper. I was thinking of buying a motorcycle for $3500 or less but I have never done this before. I want to know what would be the best for the size person I am. I am 6'5 and 300 lbs. So i need a big bike. Also is insurance generally more expensive than car insurance or not? Any suggestions will help me know what to look for. Thank you

Why is my car insurance so expensive?

I just want to buy a cheap little runabout but the insurance to cover it is approx 6 times more than the car?! I want to get an automatic 1998 Vauxhall Astra hatch for less than 500. I'm 29 and have been driving for 10 years with no accidents or convictions. Granted I only have an International licence at the moment but that shouldn't mean I should be charged any extra, should it??? Any ideas as to why my standard quotes for this car keep coming out around 3000?!""

car insurance for 17 year old new drivers

Is New York Life Insurance a good company to work for?

I have been job hunting and got a interview next week for financial adviser. I want to know if this type of job are commission based pay only and do I have to bug friend and family to buy stuff? thanks, andy""

What happens if you don't pay your car insurance?

how important is it every month to pay your car insurance? what could happen if you don't

""APPROXIMATELY, how high would insurance be on a 16 year old male driver with a manual Evo X as a first car?""

I just turned 16 and i am about to get my license.I just want an estimate like 200-300 or 300-400 or 400-500, etc. My brother is 18 and currently has an Evo and is paying ~ 500 a month for his insurance but has a terrible driving record. Totaled his car and another persons (completely his fault) speeding tickets, unsafe turn ticket. and a bunch of parking tickets. And please dont give me an answer like youre gonna kill urself or evo is too fast for a first car and too hard to learn stick in an evo because the past 8 months i have been driving my brothers STICK Evo quite alot and have absolutely no problem driving it.""

How to get car insurance for a reasonable price at 17/18?

Please, please please, do not say oooh you're a hazard, you're not going to get cheap car insurance GTFO! I am asking people who have managed to get reasonably cheap car insurance. How did you get it? What car (size engine)? What Company? I think if I get my insurance down to 1700 I will consider buying a car but I want to know how feasible this price is. Oh, by the way, I am 17 (but I will buy the car when i'm 18), I have been riding a moped for 2 years with no accidents (I'm not sure if this helps) and i won't use the car a lot, I just want a little run around. Cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeers guys!""

Car insurance in massachusetts?

how much does it cost??? i hav a project where i have to buy car insurance for a Mercedes Benz 2010 C300 Sport Sedan...... help.......??

How to find low cost car insurance in Detroit?

budget around 50 to 60 dollars per month... let me know is there have any company out there who serve affordable for others.

How do I pay my life insurance premiums on line for Globe Life and Accident Insurance Co.?

I don't have the website written down to Globe Insurance correctly and don't know how to get to the correct one so I can pay my bill. All I need is the website that allows me to pay my premium on line

Why insurance companies charge more simply on your car color?

I bought a 1991 Ford Mustang and the color of it is Red. My best friend has the same car, we both have same company, same age, same ticket-free record. And on our insurance bill we got showing the coverage, my payments were $28.50 more than his. I called them and they said it was because of the color of my car. His is blue. Why is this?""

Will this have high insurance?

i was thinking about buying a 2010 vw gti coupe or sedan. manual or automatic. is insurance on this high for a younger guy? it has a turbo on it. but it only adds i think 25hp coming out to about 200. would a sedan and automatic be cheaper insurance than a coupe/manual?

I am 16yrs old and i have a chance to get a Conquest tsi turbo how can i convince my parents?

It is a 1987 Chrysler Conquest tsi turbo. The insurance would be $53 with the student discount and good grades and what not. Without it it is $70 a month. I am trying to get a job to buy this car i realy want it any sugjestions. It costs $2500 and it only has 60,000 Miles""

What manufacturer is the cheapest scooter/moped/50cc to insure?

I am 16 and loking for a cheap insurance site for a scooter/moped/50cc Enduro bike, Does anybody know the cheapest manufacturer and insurance site? Thanks Anton""

Will my car insurance go up after this accident happened(Story included)?

Ok so my brother was driving on the highway and another car hit him but left the scene. It was the other cars fault not my brothers. A cop passed by and ask what happened. My brother didn't have license so I told them I was the one who was driving and explain everything. I was 18/17 at that time. The cop did take my license and gave it back after making a report. I am safe or will my insurance rate be high because of this??? The car and the insurance was under my brothers name. But I took the blame. The car didnt have any major damage. just the front got damage I am also afraid he could tell his insurance it was my fault so his insurance doesn't go up. Could he do that?

I need help choosing a health insurance?

I live in Southern California (If that matters). I'm young and healthy but I have been without health insurance for the last year. I was wondering who is your health insurance provider and if you would recommend it. I don't have much money since I just graduated from SDSU and without a teaching job:( But I am willing to pay the little money I have for health insurance. Thanks! I will need one that will cover dental and vision the big ones for me since I need to take my wisdom teeth out (giving me big headaches) and I wear glasses which need to be replaced soon. Thanks in advance.

What's a cheap Car Insurance Company for a 18 Year old Male?

The car is a 106 1.1 Peugeot, does anyone know of any cheap or best ways to get the cheapest car insurance.""

Divorce and custody questions in California?

My soon to be ex husband and I have a 3 month old son. I know we can work out the custody agreement but if either of us get married again, can the step parent adopt the child as their own even though both biological parents have custody? Also if not, is there a way to give the step parents rights to the child like authorizing medical care, to be on the step parents insurance, ect...""

Teenager car insurance help?

Okay! I am a 17 year old male who has been driving in total for 2 years and I have unfortunately had 2 accidents. The first occurred in May of last year. I pulled out of a gas station trying to turn left so I had to cross two lanes of oncoming traffic ( I was in an unfamiliar vehicle) I could not see the lane closest to the middle and I went out further then I thought and the oncoming car took off the front bumper. The second accident occurred 04/14 I was driving to school and there was a man ahead of me who had his signal light on for the past 4 miles it was pouring down rain so I looked over to change lanes and when maybe I looked for to long I'm not sure but wheeI turned back the man had come to a complete stop in preparation to turn from a highway onto a dirt road. I slammed on my brakes they locked up I couldn't steer away and I hit him in the rear. My question is. Is this going to keep happening to me? Am I really that bad of a driver? and what insurance company is best for my situation as my parents are removing me from their policy. Any help would be appreciated!

Child support/car insurance?

Ok so I just got my liscense and I bought half my trck and my mom bought the other half. So is it right for my dad not to pay for my insurance? And does child support cover car insurance. . .plz just give me your opinion/facts on the whole ordeal.... Have not found job just turned 15..btw Thank you all

How do I get car insurance for my 1972 VW Van????

I can get basic coverage for my van but not full coverage. Does anyone know where i can get full coverage for this van. I drive this van more than 12000 miles a year

Life insurance and mortage insurance?

I just bought a house and i have a new baby. Yay me! im 24 and I keep getting calls and letters about life insurance and mortgage accidental death insurance. Does mortgage insurance work like if i die will they pay my loan off so my son can keep my house? it says its 10.56 a month and will cover up to 200K my home loan is only 88k should i shop for something cheaper? and as for life insurance i have a 30k with my job but i want something private and someone told me do a term insurance. what happens after 30 year term is up? does my son not get that money anymore if im not passed on?

Insurance for 17 year old female?

Hello, I wanted to know what the price would be ranging between for a car that probably would have been made in the year 2000. I haven't started lessons yet but i will be by october and wanted to get a rough idea. Also i heard that there is a insurance that you can get that is cheap but you're not allowed to go out after 11pm at night or something. Is this true? if so what would the price be roughly?""

Insurance on a Motorcycle.?

I am 16 and I am wanting to purchase an '08 250 Ninja. What would I expect to pay every year in insurance? I live in MS if that would make a difference in insurance.

""How much, on average, would it cost to get a Thyroid Function Test? (No insurance) Info on Hypothyroidism?""

I was told that I might have Hypothyroidism because of my constant low blood pressure & low body temp. I was reading the symptoms and seem to have the following. Poor muscle tone (muscle hypotonia) Fatigue Cold intolerance, increased sensitivity to cold Depression Constipation Muscle cramps and joint pain Arthritis Thin, brittle fingernails Brittle hair Paleness Dry, itchy skin Weight gain Thinning of the outer third of the eyebrows Low basal body temperature Impaired memory Impaired cognitive function (brain fog) and inattentiveness <-all the time now Migraine headache Sluggish reflexes Anxiety/panic attacks <All the time now Increased need for sleep <All the time now Irritability and mood instability <All the time now Decreased sense of taste and smell Depression (Had <that for years and years now) Could it be the depression & Borderline Personality Disorder causing this or thyroid problems causing the Mental issues? Thanks for any info!""

How does coordination of benefits work with health insurance?

My primary insurance is through my employer, my husband also carries on his employers insurance (United Healthcare). How would my claims be processed under the two insurance plans? Would his insurance pick up where my primary insurance left off?""

Car payments and insurance?

is it possible for me to finance a car in my name but put the car under my parents innsurance? so the innsurance would be cheaper

Will a dropped speeding ticket affect insurance rates?

car insurance for 17 year old new drivers

My landlord requires that my dog be covered by insurance - Suggestions?

I'm renting for a year so I figure I should look into some sort of renters insurance that includes dog liability. My dog is a one year old golden retriever. There are so many ...show more

Whats the cheapest car insurance company?

in your opinion?

Insurance for moving to USA?

Myself and my partner are moving to the USA. We will need travel insurance and some health cover, and although we will both have health insurance with our new jobs, we will need cover for the first month and I am looking to see if I can find a travel insurance policy that provide the cover. Trouble is, the standard travel insurance I have seen so far assume that we will still live in the UK and that we just want cover for a months 'holiday'. One way travel insurance seems to stop 24 hours after we land in the USA Does anyone know of a one way travel insurance that will cover us for the journey and the first months stay""

How will i know which insurance group my car belongs to in UK?

is there a website to find car insurance group?

How much would i have to pay extra on my car insurance if i added my 18 year old son?

he jus got his license a few days ago?

First car + First insurance policy tips?

Alright Y!A? :) Right, so I'm 17 and I'll probably be doing my driving test pretty soon because I'm far into lessons and I've passed my theory test already. (UK - Northern Ireland, Belfast) I'm just wondering what tips you guys out there have maybe from first hand experience or what your friends, siblings or general family have done etc. I'm getting around 3200 in the June when I turned 18 because of a car crash I was in when I was like 9 so I'm hoping to get a car + a year's insurance for around 2500 at the maximum. (Hopefully) I'll probably get a car of a maximum price of about 1000 because in reality I don't need anything fancier than that, the max engine size I'd consider would probably be 1.2 and I'd want my insurance to be such that I can use the car for work such as delivering pizzas or chineses etc. so I have more options trying to find a job atm. I'm just wondering what tips you people have? Could I realistically get insurance for 1500 (Max) or under on a 1000 (Max) car with a 1.2 (Max) Litre engine? I might have to borrow money off my parents and pay them back when I'm 18 if I pass a good few months before my birthday. I'm not coming here telling you to tell me where to get cheap car insurance, I hate questions like that lol cheap car insurance doesn't exist for 17 year olds because we're all boy racers Bla-bla-bla, it's head melting! I just want to use my car to drive to college (5 minute drive), possibly work in depending on if I get a job at this bar or not and drive to peoples' houses if I need to and other general driving. I'm not just going to drive it for the craic at 3am down the motorway doing 100mph, I couldn't be bothered with all that. All I want is tips to get it as cheap as humanly possible like what I should do about named drivers, voluntary excess and anything else that might drive down the price. When it comes to it I'll ring round every insurance company available to insure people in Northern Ireland and haggle them all quoting them against each other and hope for the best. Please don't tell me specific insurance companies to go for unless you know that they definitely include NI, a lot of them exclude us. P.S. I'm a sensible guy, I'm paying for it all by myself (as far as I'm aware) so spare me the irresponsible, kid, joy rider, inexperienced, spoilt comments that so often creep up in these areas. Thanks! :)""

Car Insurance Quote...?

I've just been reading up on the internet about car insurance quotes and come across this, http://www.saxperience.com/forum/archive/index.php/t-383714.html On there are ALOT of people saying, when it asks for how long you've had your licence its from when you first had your provisional.. is this true??? i bloody hope so cause this would bring down my insurance down A LOT!""

Need cheaper car insurance?

right now im paying 388 with a company called dairyland insurnace. i have points on my license right now. and it is killing me. the car is a 06 dodge stratus. should i raise my deductible? switch to aig insurnace. this is just way too much. the lowest id prefer to go is 300 even. anyone know any good companies or the best way to find cheap insurnace . should i look in the yellow pages and not the net

What is the fine for driving without insurance at Southern California District Court?

How much is the fine for driving without insurance in the jurisdiction of the federal court in San Diego. For example if you get caught driving with no insurance in Marine Base and order to appear in court downtown, is there any fixed fine for that violation which will close the case and avoid court, or you must appear in court and the judge will decide how to punish you?""

Will car insurance go up if I'm added to my parent's policy?

I'm 15 and have my restricted license to drive to work and school in Kansas. Basically what does adding me to my parent's policy do and about how much more will it cost?

Car insurance with child?

Do you have to get different car insurance to have a child in the car?

Insurance for a 2008 Subaru Sti Hatchback?

Is the Insurance for the new 08 Sti hatchbacks gonna be cheaper than those of 04-07 Sedans? Im 18, have good grades and a clean record and was curious how much my insurance would be if i bought the Sti. Just a ballpark estimate. Thanx""

Is it really imperative to get an insurance for a second hand car I've been driving uninsured for a year now?

A lot of my friends have been pushing me but I don't see the need.

Switching insurance - will my accutane be covered??

In a weird spot - will be switching insurance within a month and a half... but i'm just starting accutane now... will the treatment be covered when i switch health insurance companies?! please help!

Are there any car insurance companies that only look back 2 years instead of 3?

Washington State Car Insurance?

I am 21 years old, and I just bought a vehicle, and transferred the title and everything. HOWEVER I only have a Learners Permit. Is it possible for me to buy insurance for the car, to use it to learn to drive prior to licensing? I don't have a spouse or parent with a car or auto insurance, so that is out of the options.""

I got a ticket the same day as I got insurance?

I got pulled over but didn't have proof of insurance. I got a ticket, but only have to go in to the highway patrol to get the paper signed when I show proof of insurance. I got insurance that same day, will that work?""

Where to get cheap insurance for a young driver?

I'm 17 getting insured on my mums yaris 1.0, don't mind if it's got one of them box things that measures speed etc. Just wondering If anyone can recommend anyone they have used and have got a good quote from thanks Ed""

Does anyone know of affordable health insurance for college students?

""Is car insurance on a coupe, two seater car really that expensive?

or is it only like $20 extra as compared to a regular four door? my mom makes it sound like its another hundred....

How much does a VW Golf GTi 2003 - 2008 cost on insurance? Help :( !?!?

I know a golf gti is very costly to insure which is a bummer! =/ Cheapest quote possible. Oh and it has to be Fully Comp! Haha have a feeling its going to cost an arm and a leg to insure. And which Car Insurance site is the best to use? Would be very helpful for some answers back :) Just need a rough idea how much its going to cost, so i could start saving and miss out the student nights and all the wonderful drinking with the mates. J x""

How much will insurance cost after 2 duis?

I am 24 years old and live in Michigan and I received my 2nd offense DUI in April of last year. I've been sober ever since and have AA signatures to prove it to the board for license evaluation. If I get it back I will automatically have a Breathalyzer in the car for a minimum of when year. It won't start if it blows alcohol. You know how they work. lol. I was wondering if anyone knows approx. how much I will pay for insurance. Thank you in advance for answers.

Best insurance companies for 21 year old passed my test.?

ok ive pased my test a month on friday and i gettin a car this week and i need some insurance on the car obviiously lol, well basically whats the cheapest car insurance all you 21 year old have and who is it with, please :)""

Does your insurance go up?

If you park in a bus stop zone, in NYC, and get a ticket. Does your car insurance go up? What happens? I paid it off right away in like 2 hours, will there be something else?""

Cost of Car Insurance for an Escalade EXT?

car insurance for 17 year old new drivers

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/affordable-insurance-agency-augusta-ga-noah-washington/"

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