#it wasnt fun it wasn't relaxing i was terrified of being in close contact with other people

[tasakesi]

also the pandemic wasnt a “simple window to what we could be without capitalism”. IF U THINK THAT YOU WERE INCREDIBLY PRIVILEGED AND YOUR EXPERIENCES WEREN'T UNIVERAL

[anastasiaskarsgard]

Destiny of the Damned

Part 1 - Meeting Roman

Chapter 3 - Zombie

"Why wouldn't you go on dates? They're fun. Even if you end up never speaking to the person again, how else are you going to embarrass yourself singing karaoke, or bowling, or playing putt putt golf, or laser tag?" I asked.

"I'm more interested in fast forwarding to the end of the date." He smiled and winked at me. "Besides, I don't think I've ever done any of those things you said... Ever"

"Whhhhhhaaaaattttttt? Shut your dirty whore mouth." I exclaimed wide eyed with my mouth hanging open.

"What? That stuff is too cheesy for me. I've got a lot on my plate, I don't have time for nonsense."

"When I grow up, I wanna be just like you." I say like a smart-ass, resting my chin in my palm as i lean on the center console "Ok change of plans. We are now going to this address." I keyed in the new information into the navigation.

"Is this like your favorite place?" he asks with a smirk.

"No, I've never gone, but I remember reading about it."

"So any address you ever see, you remember forever?" he asks incredulously.

"Yes. Anything I read or see, I remember. Not so much what I hear always."

He raised my hand to his pillow lips and gently kissed along my knuckles and across the back of my hand. He took my index finger into his mouth and gently sucked on it, turning his lustful gaze on me with such intensity, i could feel the heat in my core. I could see how he got his reputation, and Although it felt nice, I blurted out my first thought.

"I bet you made out with your hand when you were a kid huh? Like when you decided to practice?"

He froze and removed my finger from his mouth and turned to me rolling his eyes, "Don't you find me attractive?"

"Duh." I giggled.

"Duh?" He shook his head and dropped my hand putting both hands on the wheel and staring ahead with a sour look on his perfect face.

I stare at him as he continues to ignore me. Good fucking luck buddy. I got my phone out and opened my karaoke app. I turned the radio off and selected a song I figured everyone knew; "Zombie" by the Cranberries.

"Excuse me, I was listening to that." Roman said, flashing me an annoyed look, as he reached to turn his radio back on, but I karate chop his hand at the last moment, and he lets out a yelp in surprise.

"Hiya!" I shouted playfully. "We are going to sing karaoke on the way and get that off your bucket list."

"I wasn't aware that was on my list." He said icily, staring straight ahead again looking even meaner.

"Brrrr. It's so cold in here... must be you." I take my seat belt off and lean across the center console and breath hot breath on his throat and then lick all the way up to his ear, and then gently kiss his cheek. He visibly melts and lets out a low growl and pulls over. As soon as the suv was in park, he picks me up completely and sets me in his lap before crushing my lips with a frantic kiss. I could feel him getting aroused since I was in his lap, and I pull away to look at him, both of us already out of breath. We lock eyes and he opens his mouth to speak, but thinks better of what it was he was going to say and just returns my gaze with a half smile playing across his lips. I search his face, taking in the Gorgeous green color of his eyes, his pillow soft lips, The little line in the middle of his nose, the hardly noticeable scar on his cheek, his severe cheekbones, the way his face looked almost perfectly symmetrical. He was so beautiful. What the hell do I have to lose here?

"What are you thinking about?" He asks as I lean in to kiss him again.

"How someone so beautiful, can be so lonely." I say against hi lips without thinking. As soon as it comes out, I want to slap myself.

"Who said I was lonely?" He says almost shyly. 

I meet his eyes and tenderly kiss him. I place my hands on each cheek and nibble on his bottom lip ending in a drawn out smooch. I open my eyes and he is staring at me thoughtfully. I nuzzle my nose against his cheek and I feel him relaxing, before he snaps to attention, glring at me suspiciously. 

"Tell me What.You. Want. From. Me."He commanded. His eyes never leaving my own, his intense gaze willing me to tell him what he wants to know. I don't think he knows what it's like to hear no. I try to think of the answer to his question, because I am just as curious what the answer is. finally I think I have the answer. 

"I want you Roman. And I want you to want me. But not the easy way" I said pressing my hand down on his stiff erection. "I want it from here." I placed my hand on his heart and placed his hand on mine.

He looked a little nervous, and broke our eye contact and looked out the window. He chuckles uncomfortably shaking his head, "If you knew me, the real me... you wouldn't say such a thing. I'm ugly and I'm incapable of love. Giving it or receiving it."

My heart broke for him. What could be his reason for saying such a thing? People don't say stuff like that for nothing. This boy had some deep issues and some serious baggage. i let out a big sigh, as  I crawled back over into my seat.

"I should take you back." He said, not making eye contact.

"I'll fucking climb through your doggy door if you try to escape me now." I teased.

He smiles in spite of himself and turns to me with his eyebrow cocked, "I don't have a doggy door."

"It's easy enough to make one." I say seriously as he searches my face for something. 

"Great you're a psycho," He laughs. He was trying not to smile but he couldn't help it. He tried a few times to go back to his brooding mean mug, but then hed glance over at me, and break out into a smile again. "I like you a lot. You're crazy." He leaned over to kiss me gently on my lips, running his fingers into my hair, before pulling away, and turning on the car. "Now let's try this again shall we?"

He truly was breathtaking when he smiled. It was then I decided I wasn't going to be cautious or hold back. I was just going to give 100% and hope for the best. Worst case scenario; i get to have a night with Roman Godfrey, Best case, well I wasnt sure what the best case was but i bet there was a Pinterest or two dedicated to it. 

"You remind me of her so much. Your attitude and free spirited carefree nonsense..." He said wistfully.

"Letha?" I asked.

He nodded slowly.

"She must of been a fucking legend," I joked."Time to sing fool!" I howled.

"You really don't forget do you?".

"um, nope. I'll go first, and you can see how I do it and then, we will switch, and you sing while I drive, and so on and so forth."

"What makes you think I'll let you drive my car?"

"Because I can afford to replace it and you don't give a shit about material possessions anyway." i huff.

He laughed and agreed.

"Prepare to be entertained!" I belt out "Zombie" like i  was on stage performing for thousands. I knew I was an excellent singer and I wanted to impress him and it was clear i Had.

 "Could you sing one more song for me?"

"Sure. What song you wanna hear?" i asked excited he liked my singing.

"Geri by Super Humanoids."

"Oh I like that song." I found the song and started to sing. I decided to use two voices for the man and the woman singer. I sounded kinda silly but I had good range and could do high notes as easily as very low notes. It was actually a challenge sounding so ridiculous and we both laughed and laughed when the song ended.

"Switch." I yelled.

He sighed dramatically, but he pulled over. I jumped out my side and he stepped out walking around the front of the car. Just as we were about to pass each other, I grabbed Roman by his blazer and pushed him against the grill kissing him hungrily. He was all for it and switched positions with me pressing me against the large Mercedes symbol. I reached for his belt buckle and looked at him for permission.

"Wow really?" He hissed mischievously.

"I'm giving you 100%, I'm not being afraid of you, I'm trusting you." I looked up at him innocently. "Can we try that?"

"I don't know beautiful. I've never done that, and we hardly know each other, and you don't want to try that with me." He said looking everywhere but my eyes.

"Yes I do." I stated. "Don't be a pussy, what are you afraid of?"

He looked down at me, still hesitant but with a sparkle in his eye. "I'm terrified of you."

"wow. honesty. youre turn. ask me anything!"

"Tell me your darkest secret... " it was an order, but he wasn't trying to compel me. This was sincere curiosity on his part.

"wow you don't fuck around! Well the date might be over when i tell you, but here goes.' why this question I scream in my head, before blurting out, "I killed my parents, I'm not sorry, and if given the chance, I'd do it again." Shit. That was a bit of an overshare. I could of left out the last half.

Romans eyes grew wide and his eyebrows shot up as he took a few steps back from me. "Fuck baby, you don't gotta tell me why, but did they deserve it?"

"Yes." I said without hesitation. My heart sank as he looked at me strangely, unreadable to me.

"That's so fucking hot." He closed the gap between us and pulled me over to the passenger side of the car, seating me on the seat, facing him as he stood between my legs. His kisses were so fevered and desperate. It's like he was starving and I was the only cure to his hunger. He stripped my shirt off and whimpered when he saw my breasts in my sexiest lace bra that only covers less than half my breasts, and at 36D, that's quite an eyefull. He slipped my nipple into his mouth, circling each nipple several times before sucking on them hard and then lapping at them back and forth at a feverish pace. He pulled my panties off, but left my jean skirt on, and plunged his fingers inside my soaking wet core, using his thumb to rub circles on my clit.

I reached down and unbuckled his belt and pants, freeing the biggest penis I had ever seen. It was more girthy then usual and quite long. No wonder he was so arrogant. "Let me suck your cock please." i stated. I have an admitted oral fixation, and quite enjoy wrapping my lips around a nice cock. theres something about making a man melt, and be putty in your hands, that gets me excited. 

"Yes mam." Roman said breathing heavily and groaning as I run my hand up and down his shaft. He backed up and I got on my knees assessing his cock. My god IT IS EVEN BEAUTIFUL! How is he so perfect? I opened my mouth as wide as I could and barely fit it inside. I had no gag reflex, but even with that advantage, I could only handle a little over half of the total cock in my mouth. I used my hands to work the rest of it, making sure to play with his balls and look up at him now and then. 

He moaned "oh baby, You're so fucking good at that. I swear baby, you are the fucking best blowjob ever and that's saying a lot." He was breathing heavily and watching every thing I did with great interest. "Can I fuck your little pussy now please? Cars keep passing and totally know what we are up to, so we need to hurry, but first I need to bury my cock deep inside of you."

I stood up, wiping drool from my chin, and bent over the seat, offering Roman to take me from behind, but he flipped me around crushing me with his lips as he shoved his cock deep inside me. I couldn't help but to cry out. I'd never felt so full, it was amazing. Anyone that ever says size doesn't matter, is a fucking liar. If I hadn't been so wet, it may have been an issue, but luckily I was embarrassingly dripping.

"I want to see your face as I fuck you, is this ok?" roman moans kissing me deeply again.  "Why do I feel so fucking attached to you like I'm in fucking love with you? What have you done to me angel?" He whimpers as my breath hitches and i nod that I am ok, so he picks up the pace and I scream out his name.

"Harder Roman! It hurts so fucking good. Fucking break me baby,I'm gonna cum, don't you dare fucking stop." I held on to him as I felt my orgasm building up to near spilling over when I felt his teeth sink into my shoulder causing my release to hit me like a tidal wave and I bite him back, Digging my teeth in his collar bone, tasting his blood splash into my mouth.

"Where do I cum?" He asks frantically, peering into my eyes, pupils blown out, looking fucked out and helpless.

"Back up." I ordered. He did so and I got on my knees and opened my mouth as He shoved his cock down my throat and convulsed, shooting his load down my throat. I get up and he grabs my face smiling.

"Baby you look so fucking crazy. You bit the shit out of me." He says pulling me to the rear view mirror, to see the blood and drool all over my face. 

I grabbed some napkins out of the glove box and poured the remainder of my water on it, so I could clean off my face. I did the best I could and got in the driver seat. I looked over at Roman and he had this dopey look on his face. "You okay?" I asked.

"I think I'm smitten." He said dreamily. "That was so fucking hot, I will go play fucking mini golf or fucking bingo or wherever the fuck you want,I don't give a shit. I want to make you happy."

I looked over expecting a joking demeanor but there was none. He was serious. I was right about him, he just needed someone to love him most. He needed to be the boss and in control and to feel special and I was going to give him that.

"You've got me 100% Roman. Now choose a song. Don't think I forgot!"

"Do we get to do that every time we switch because if so, I'm gonna have a fucking marathon karaoke session up in this motherfucker." he said with a twinkle in his eye. 

I genuinely laughed with him, intoxicated by this strange feeling we were feeling. Happiness and attachment, were no friends of mine but for once i wasnt afraid,which was insane! If there was ever a boy to be afraid of, he was it, but not tome. To me, he was just perfect.