#joel is so boyfriend in this chapter i'm gonna screaaaaaaam

[beardedjoel]

closer | part nine

joel x f!reader. non-apocalypse au  

series masterlist | main masterlist | ao3  

chapter summary: your friend sofia is visiting austin, and she drags you out for drinks and dancing, where you have some unexpected surprises in the form of joel. 12.8k words.

chapter warnings: 18+ MDNI, age difference (joel is 42 and reader is 25), soft!dom joel, oral (f receiving), unprotected piv, squirting, dirty talk, praise kink, reader being cute and teasing joel a bunch, joel is so insanely boyfriend this chapter it actually fucking hurts

a/n: this is probably one of my favorite chapters i wrote! it’s a lengthy one too so hope you all enjoy the sofia and joel shenanigans ♡

You’re very deliberately letting Joel come to you tonight. After his promise earlier today, you want to see what he’ll do, how far he’ll go. The thought of all the possibilities alone has your head spinning and heart pounding. 

Now all that’s left to do is wait, to anticipate, unsure of when he’ll make good on his word and come take what he wants from you. You put on a gorgeous, silky lace trimmed powder blue slip that barely covers your ass and tits, leaving practically nothing to the imagination. 

You get in bed, thinking if you just pretend to sleep, it’ll come to you more quickly. You want Joel to come in and see you sleeping innocently, maybe seemingly forgetting about what he promised you today. You bet it would rile him up even more, and the thought makes you laugh and then shiver slightly. But he should know better that you wouldn’t forget that when the promise of his cock being inside you is involved.

You don’t know when you fell asleep, but the next thing you know, your eyes flutter open gently and you know it’s been hours. All night, actually. The pale dawn light is streaming in through your shades, signaling the start of a new day. You stretch a little, rolling over before everything from last night comes back to you, hitting you hard right in the gut.

Joel never came.

The disappointment sinks deep into your stomach, leaving a swirling, nauseous sensation. You try not to get too caught up in it, but your mind is immediately latching onto all the possibilities, most of them making your heart sink further. It’s entirely possible you had read him wrong, that what he said wasn’t a promise to come over at all. You cling onto the hope that it’s something easily explainable that you can hear about the next time you see him. You reach for your phone, seeing he hadn’t messaged you at all last night. Your fingers twitch over your phone screen, feeling desperate to reach out and make sure everything is alright.

A frantic, solid knock on your door gets your attention, and you slide out of bed, rolling your eyes as you catch a glimpse of your slip out in your periphery. You’d even gone so far as to dress up for him, and you feel completely foolish for it. 

You whip open your door, and Joel is standing there, looking haggard. He seems out of breath, like he rushed over here. His mouth is open to speak, but his eyes move back and forth from your face to your slip several times before he shuts it, sighing.

“Oh, sweet girl, I’m so sorry,” he spills out, reaching forward and grabbing your face. You immediately usher him inside, not wanting to accidentally be seen by your parents. You try to fight the urge to completely give in to him the second he touches you, wanting to understand his absence from last night first. His warm, strong hands holding you so desperately is making it so fucking difficult, though. You don’t respond, don’t touch him back, as he pulls you into him.

“It was Tommy, I’m so sorry,” he says.

“Is Tommy okay?” you ask, concerned. The tension in his voice and mention of his brother immediately snaps you out of your frustration at him.

“Yeah, it’s nothin’ like that. He needed to get bailed out… again,” Joel says, sounding exasperated. “That’s why I didn’t come last night, all of it took longer than normal. Fightin’ with the fuckin’ officers since he’s been in more than a few times the last few years. All of it got so… out of hand.” He sighs, melting into you as you finally reach up around him and hug him back.

“I’m sorry, Joel. That sounds like an awful night,” you reply, feeling a wave of relief for yourself rush through you, and one of worry for Tommy. “Everything’s alright now, though?”

“Yeah, bastard’s back home, no thanks to himself,” Joel says, lingering frustration lacing his tone. “Swear, one of these days, he’s gonna have to deal with it on his own. That’s enough about that though,” he says, leaning back to grab the sides of your cheeks and look down at you. His eyes look tired, almost hurt as they search yours for any clue as to how you’re feeling. “I should’ve texted to let you know, too. I was so damn mad I just couldn’t even think straight, if I’m bein’ honest. I’m sorry, darlin’,” Joel adds, as if reading your mind. That question had been on the tip of your tongue, wondering why he hadn’t just messaged you to fill you in.

“That’s okay, Joel, it’s really alright,” you assure him, touching your hand to his. “That’s the only reason you didn’t come, though? All that stuff with Tommy?” you ask, biting the inside of your lip nervously after you ask.

“Of course, baby. Why else wouldn’t I come?” Joel tilts his head in concern, eyes still glued onto yours.

“I just… wasn’t sure. I was worried I’d read too much into it.”

“If you don’t think I'd rather have been here all night doin’ everything I planned to do to you, you’re out of your damn mind,” Joel says, a smirk tugging at the edge of his lips.

“Planned to do to me?” you echo, furrowing your brow with curiosity.

“You have no idea…” he sighs, stroking your cheek. “I have a lot to make up to you.” He leans down and brushes his lips onto yours, kissing you lightly for a few moments.

The confirmation from Joel that he had wanted to be here last night lifts the weight off your chest that had been there since you woke up and realized he wasn’t there with you. You finally crack a little smile, and it looks like his own expression lightens. 

“I don’t think making it up to me will be a problem,” you tease, running a hand lightly down his chest, and Joel chuckles.

“Tonight?” he asks eagerly.

You wince a little, then press your lips together and sigh. “My friend from Chicago is coming today, I have to pick her up in a few hours, and she’ll be here all weekend,” you tell him. 

Joel considers this new information for a few moments, his hands tracing along your hips and back. “You excited to see her?”

You nod, unable to help the smile spreading across your face. “I am, yeah. This is my closest friend for the entire time I lived there. We even lived together for a bit.”

He now seems to be smiling for your sake. “That’s great,” he says, looking excited for you. “I bet you’ll have a good time together, then.”

“She’s practically the opposite of me, totally outgoing and crazy, so we always end up finding something fun to do when she’s in charge,” you say, laughing a little.

“You sayin’ you aint fun?” Joel chides, pulling his brows together. “I think you’re plenty fun,” he says, pulling you close to him again so that your bodies are flush with each other.

“Oh, you think so, huh?” you tease, feeling a flirtatious smile tug at your lips.

Joel nods, bringing his lips close to you, brushing against your cheek, then making his way down to your neck. He places a few light kisses downwards towards your collarbone.

“Can’t make it up to you tonight, but I can certainly give you a little taste right now,” he murmurs close to your ear. You feel your body immediately melt into his, pressing into his solid body, feeling the warmth radiating off of him.

“I was just about to take a shower…” you say as an invitation, your voice going low with the desire suddenly flowing through you. Joel answers by picking you up from underneath, carrying you into your bathroom before setting you on the counter, letting your legs straddle his body as he pushes in between them.

“You even wore all your pretty stuff for me, huh?” he says, looking down at your slip and examining it more closely, running a finger along the lace trim at the top, dangerously close to your nipples. You inhale sharply as he brushes over them in the process, and he catches his eyes on yours. “Such a shame I didn’t get to play with you all night wearin’ this…” he breathes out with a shake of his head. He pushes the slip all the way up your legs and marvels at the matching thong you’re wearing. 

“I’m gonna kill my brother,” he says sternly before hooking his fingers into the straps of your underwear and tugging down - you lift your hips to help him and he promptly tosses your panties on the floor. He tugs your hips to the edge of the counter and kneels before you, sinking his mouth between your legs and tasting you. His tongue licks a stripe up your slit and you push your hips into it, the first few touches of his mouth feeling like absolute heaven. You breathe out a moan and Joel makes an appreciative noise in response to you.

“Fuckin’ wet already, sweet girl,” he says quietly, pulling his mouth off of you for a moment.

“I was waiting for you all night, of course I’m wet,” you say plainly, and Joel smirks up at you, a fire igniting behind his eyes.

“Never gonna hear the end of this, am I?” he asks before leaning down to flick your clit with his tongue in a few, quick strokes. Your hips tense and move into it, but you try to keep your composure to mess with him.

You laugh a little and then shake your head. “We’ll see,” you tease him, “Depends on how well you make it up to me.”

Much to your dismay, Joel stops moving his tongue immediately, then brings his gaze back up to your face, the look in his eyes completely devilish now. “Oh, really? You gonna be a little brat again when I’ve got my mouth between your legs, about to make you come? I could stop at any time, y’know.” He swipes a finger through your slit to tease you, adding to the effect of his words.

You lick your lips and inhale slowly, considering your options. The ache between your legs from his few touches is already almost unbearable, pulsing with need for him to continue.

“N-no, don’t stop,” you say, whisper-quiet, and Joel’s brow arches.

“What was that?” he asks, fingers now teasingly tracing around the outside of your pussy.

“I said don’t stop.” You force your voice a bit louder, closing your eyes as he glides one of his fingers over your clit.

“Good girls say ‘please’, don’t they?” he says, every word laced with the gorgeous, commanding bite that you’ve grown to adore and crave from him.

“P-please,” you say, swallowing hard. “Please don’t stop, Joel.”

“That’s what I thought,” he drawls, teasing your clit once more. “Really needed to teach you that lesson last night, didn’t I?”

His mouth is back on you, and you can only nod in response as he licks in strokes along your cunt, long and drawn out. You whimper, wanting to feel more, and he continues to draw this painful pleasure out of you, dipping his tongue in and out of your entrance and tasting you deeply. His tongue flicks along your slit, landing on your clit before his entire mouth sucks on the bundle of nerves there. You cry out, hands gripping the edge of the counter as he sucks even harder. You almost can’t breathe, the sensation is so strong and he’s not letting up. You grip the back of his head, fingers sinking into his hair, when he releases you and your breath catches in your throat, hips rocking forward with the sudden absence of his mouth. He slides his tongue in tight circles around your clit, bringing out the warm, spreading feeling of a building climax inside your core. Your body is tensing into it already, on the cusp of something so fucking incredible that only Joel can bring out of you, when his lips close again and suck mercilessly.

You cry out loudly, moaning as your grip on his hair tightens, making sure his head doesn’t move an inch from where he’s currently uprooting your entire world. Everything tenses and explodes at once, your hips pushing into his mouth as you tremble, the waves of pleasure hitting you over and over before you can finally relax back slightly, steading your breathing.

Joel stands, placing his hands on your thighs and leaning forward to plant a kiss on your forehead. “”Off to the shower with you,” he says.

“You’re not joining me?” you ask, blinking in your post-orgasm stupor, confusion written on your face now.

“I’m already pushin’ it with time, I gotta get to work, baby,” he says apologetically, and you frown, disappointed that this short time was all you got to spend with him after the let down of last night.

“Oh, alright,” you mumble, biting the inside of your lip again.

“I know you’re upset, I’m sorry, darlin’. I promised I’d make it all up to you, though. You trust me?”

You nod, a small smile cracking through the frustration you’re feeling. “Yeah, I trust you.”

“Good,” he says, kissing your lips quickly. “Give it a few days, and when you’re free again you’ll forget this even happened.” He winks, and you roll your eyes, despite the little flutter it gives you.

When he leaves, you sit on the counter for a few more minutes, silently processing the entirety of this morning and last night. You’re unable to feel anything but warmth for the man who’d rushed over here to apologize to you as soon as he could, and then shown that apology by pulling yet another earth shattering orgasm out of you and promising to do better, to make things up to you. You almost wish you could just be angry at him for anything at all, it would certainly be easier than whatever the hell these emotions you’re having right now are.

“I’m so glad you’re here,” you sigh, hugging Sofia again as you enter your apartment.

She arrived a few hours after Joel left this morning, and you picked her up from the airport, eagerly waiting for her outside her terminal before she ran into your arms like you were two lovers that had been separated for years. She’s always had a flair for the dramatic, but it’s part of what you love about her. Sofia knows how to see the good in most situations, and she’s one of the most loyal people you know. You couldn’t be seeing her at a better time, as you’re starting to get completely consumed by everything going on with Joel. You just really need a friend like her here to help you process the complex feelings that have been swirling through your mind recently.

She returns the hug and chuckles a bit into your ear. “Struggling that bad, huh?” she asks, pulling away from your embrace. You both sit down on your bed, pulling your legs underneath you and getting comfortable. 

“It’s not even that, I’m just like this crazy, obsessed girl, and you know I’m not like that ever,” you tell her. Sofia ponders it with a thoughtful look and then nods her head. 

“I can’t say I’ve ever seen you obsessing over any guy, until now,” she smirks. Sofia loves this kind of thing - she’s absolutely enjoying your escapades with Joel a little too much, you think. She’s usually the one filling you in on her sexual adventures with people, not the other way around. 

“I know, and I hate it. I feel pathetic,” you groan, falling back into the bed dramatically. 

“Okay, pathetic or not, you know I’m here for it. I haven’t heard any updates for a little bit, so…” she trails off, looking over at you expectantly. You haven’t said anything, pressing your lips together tightly, giving her an innocent look. “Come on, you know I’m asking if you guys fucked yet.”

You sit back up and nod slightly, biting your lip, and she goes crazy. “Oh my god! Okay and? Tell me everything.”

“Okay, I’m not giving you every single detail, Jesus. But yeah, it was pretty much the best sex I’ve ever had.”

Sofia groans. “Ughhh, why aren’t I having the best sex ever with my sexy, forbidden, older neighbor? Count your blessings,” she shakes her head, eyes wide. You both start laughing, clutching your bellies. 

“Your time will come, Soph. And I’ll be there to guide you.”

“Okay, so you two have done the deed. And it was amazing? Tell me just a little more. C’mon, I haven’t hardly gotten a peep out of you about this yet.” She crosses her arms, waiting for you to answer. Her light brown eyes bore into yours and you can’t resist the desperate plea for information that’s behind them.

“Fine,” you sigh, and she squeals, clasping her hands together. “We’ve… done it a couple of times. Lots of other hand and mouth stuff before that. He eats me out like it’s his last fucking meal, is known to give a good spanking, uh, what else…” you trail off, trying to overload her with information, and her jaw hangs open, rarely hearing this much brazen information from you about any of your sexual encounters. ”He just makes me do and feel crazy stuff,” you conclude, trying to shrug casually despite knowing the wild knowledge you’re dropping on her.

Sofia simply shakes her head, mouth hanging open as she processes the information. “You two are little fucking freaks, you know that? God, I envy you right now.”

“Sofia, you honestly fuck more than anyone I know, how are you jealous?”

“I’m in a little dry spell, okay? I haven’t had any… relations for over a month.”

“A whole month, heaven forbid,” you tease her, putting the back of your hand to your forehead, acting dramatically faint.

She laughs loudly and pushes you hard. “Shut up, I’m desperate,” she replies. “It’s your turn to be the crazy sexual one now, so wear the crown with honor.”

You roll your eyes but placate her with a regal bow of your head. “Come on, let’s go shopping,” you say, and she perks up immediately, jumping off the bed and completely forgetting about her so-called ‘dry spell’.

Sofia catches up with your parents for a few minutes, having met them when they came to visit you in Chicago, before you let them know where you’re going and head out. Sofia is eyeing Joel’s house curiously as you pull out of the driveway. 

“Yes, that’s his house, the one with the big porch,” you grumble, and she can’t stop smirking at you.

“Hot,” she says.  

“What does that even mean! His house is hot? You don’t even know what he looks like.”

“Yeah, you’re telling me. Ridiculous you still haven’t shown me a photo. Everything you say about him sounds hot, though.” Sofia rolls her eyes. She’s so ridiculous, and you missed her energy since you relocated here. You can’t believe she came all the way here so soon after you moved, and in the middle of a Texas summer, no less. You’re hoping she can keep you anchored a bit while she’s here, but you know for a fact she’s very likely to do the opposite with her blasée personality and encouragement of you being the one to go a little crazy. 

You two shop for a few hours, and of course Sofia ends up with several new outfits, claiming that it’s too hot here for all her clothes she brought. She makes you try on dresses because she’s desperate to have a night out with you while she’s here, and you cringe at first, but find a rather tight black dress with a low cut back and little cutouts on the sides that makes you actually feel like going out. She squeals when she sees it, and you can’t help but immediately wonder what Joel would think of it, but you think you already know the answer. 

“Mr. Hot Neighbor is going to lose his fucking mind if he sees you in that dress you got,” Sofia says on the way home, as if she could read your thoughts. 

“I do… think he’d like it, based on the other clothes he’s liked on me,” you admit a little shyly. 

Sofia sighs. “Ugh, that’s so hot.”

“Stop saying everything about us is hot,” you laugh. 

“But it is! You two are so hot it’s killing me. When am I going to meet him?” She’s bouncing a bit eagerly in her seat now. 

You pause, feeling your eyes widen. You honestly hadn’t really thought about it, assuming you wouldn’t see Joel much for a few days while Sofia was visiting. The thought of introducing them makes you feel a little nauseous, just because it’s like two worlds colliding, and you know Sofia will have something completely insane to say to him. 

“I actually don’t know…” you confess. “Maybe we’ll run into him since he lives right there.”

Sofia eyes you, knowing you are starting to overthink things, so she stays quiet on the matter. When you pull up you see Joel’s truck is in his driveway, eliciting a comment from Sofia that even his truck is sexy, but you don’t see any sign of Joel outside, so the coast seems clear. You two are laughing with your shopping bags, passing through the gate to go back to your apartment, when you see Joel walking out his front door and making his way over to his truck parked in the driveway. You bite back a groan, knowing he’s going to see you and Sofia, and you desperately want to avoid the awkwardness. 

Joel approaches, smiling, and Sofia stops her chattering to turn and see what you’re looking at over her shoulder. “Oh…” she says quietly under her breath. “Oh,” she repeats, with a bit more suggestion behind her voice as she continues to inspect Joel.

“Well hello there,” he says, coming up where you’re now standing and waiting for him. His face looks entertained at the fact that you seem completely uncomfortable and embarrassed about where this is going.

“Joel, this is my friend Sofia. The one I told you about,” you say, trying not to grit your teeth. 

“Pleasure,” Joel says with a thick accent, holding out his hand, and Sofia shakes it with the biggest smile on her face. Joel’s eyebrows twitch at the suspiciously large smile on your friend’s face and he glances at you for confirmation. 

You nod slightly with a slight eye roll, letting him know that yes, Sofia knows all about you two. 

“It’s so great to meet you. Thanks for being such a good neighbor to my friend here,” she says, her tone sweet but the devious implication behind it is not missed on any of you. You snort out a laugh, and it sends Sofia cracking up, Joel shaking his head slightly but laughing along with you two. 

“What’re you ladies up to?” Joel asks, continuing to shake his head a little. 

“Shopping,” Sofia announces excitedly, waving her bags around. “I think you’ll be very pleased with some of our purchases,” she says, and Joel’s eyebrows raise. Jesus, you think to yourself, she’s being so… Sofia right now. 

Joel chuckles, looking to you for confirmation, and you giggle a little bit. “I can’t deny that she’s right,” you tell him, and a look of curiosity flashes across his face. You did also buy a thong that you’re dying to show him, but that’s going to have to wait.

“Well, you two ladies have fun,” he quips, the smile not leaving his face.

“I’m sure I’ll see you around while I’m here,” Sofia winks, and you can’t even be mad at her for it because you know the winking is all on your own behalf. You practically drag her up the stairs, waving to Joel as you go. 

You burst through the door of your apartment, and Sofia immediately pretends to pass out on the floor. So damn dramatic, you think with amusement. 

“Oh my fucking god,” she says, her chest heaving from the laughter. “That man… that is who you’re sleeping with right now? Like, you are fucking that man right there?” Sofia is completely beside herself. 

“Get a grip, Soph. Yes, somehow I’m fucking that man.”

“Listen, I didn’t doubt you when you said he was hot, but this is another level,” she says, propping herself up on her elbows.

“You’re telling me!” you reply. “How the hell did I even end up in this situation?” you ask, more to yourself than anyone, but Sofia shakes her head.

She blows out a breath, getting to her feet. “Good for you, seriously,” she says, gripping you by the shoulders and shaking them. 

“Oh, it’s very good for me,” you quip, and you both start laughing all over again.

The next evening, Sofia has managed to convince you to go out downtown and find a bar or club to blow off some steam. She says that you “need this” since you seem so tightly wound about the Joel situation, and you think she might be right.

You’re sitting on the floor with Sofia across from you while she does your makeup. She’s infinitely better at this than you are, and she makes you look flawless anytime she puts makeup on for you. 

“Okay, so how big is it?” she asks, seemingly out of nowhere as she’s brushing highlighter onto your cheekbones. 

“No way,” you say, shaking your head with a tight lipped smile. 

She pulls back, holding her hands up, makeup brush still held in between her fingers.. “Just stop me when it’s the right size,” she says, expanding her hands outwards, raising her eyebrows. 

“It’s big,” you reply simply, and she throws her hands down in exasperation. 

“Fine, I’ll accept that answer. For now,” she scowls.

Sofia continues on your makeup, until she scoots back a little and gives you a once over. “Perfection,” she comments, giving you a proud smile. You stand up, going to the mirror in the bathroom to inspect her work. She’s done a perfect winged eyeliner with a smoky, sparkly eyeshadow look, blush, highlighter, and given you just the right lipstick color to tie it all together with your new dress. You marvel at how good you look and feel right now, starting to actually look forward to your night out together. 

“Always perfect, Soph,” you say, tousling your hair a bit. She comes over and stands next to you, inspecting the both of you in the mirror together with an excited look on her face.

When you make your way out to the street, you both decide to order a ride so you don’t have to drive after the drinks you plan on having. You’re both standing there at the end of the driveway, waiting for the car that’s still several minutes away when Sofia turns to you. 

“Why don’t you go show Joel your new look?” she suggests, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Wouldn’t that be weird, though? Just knock on his door and be like ‘look at me!’ and then run away in a few minutes when our ride gets here?”

“You said he’d like that dress, and not to toot my own horn but… you just look so good right here too,” she gestures a circle around your face with her hand, and you laugh. “Go,” she pushes you, then checks her phone. “It says this guy is still like 5 minutes away.”

You begrudgingly trot over to Joel’s, feeling a little unsteady on your heels - you haven’t worn shoes like this for a while. You reach your hand up tentatively and knock on his door. There’s no answer for a moment, increasing your anxiety but finally the door opens, and Joel’s eyes scan you, a quick flash of recognition crosses his face and his mouth hangs open, unable to speak for a moment. 

“Shit… now what the hell is goin’ on here?” he smirks, taking you in with slow glances over your entire body, and the way he’s taking you in feels like it’s setting your skin on fire.

“Sofia is dragging me out, and I wanted to show you how I look,” you wring your hands in front of you, trying hard to maintain a confident air about yourself. 

“Christ, that’s a look for sure, baby,” he says, continuing to inspect every inch of your body in this new dress. “Sure you can’t just stay here and let me look at ya all night?”

You giggle a bit. “Tragically, no.”

“S’alright, I’m actually goin’ out tonight too,” he tells you, and you try to shake off the creeping jealous feeling that sneaks in at wondering who he’s going out with. You know it’s hypocritical, but infatuation with Joel doesn’t seem to have any logic.

“Come here real quick,” he says, pulling you by the hand inside and just behind the door, leaving it ajar. His hands immediately go to your ass, pulling you into him and crashing his lips into yours, and both of your mouths open as your tongues slide over each other. One of Joel’s hands threads through your hair, and you’re gripping the back of his neck desperately as you two passionately devour each other for a few moments. 

He pulls away, breathless. “Fuck, I know you gotta go,” he says. You nod, your eyes already filled with unrelenting desire as you look back at him. 

“You’ll see this again, I promise,” you tell him, hesitantly pulling out of his arms and shooting him a wry look.

“I better,” he replies, smirking as he watches you make your way back over to Sofia, who is waving you over into the car. 

You feel your phone buzz in your bag, and Joel is texting you once the car is down the street. 

Joel: You look beautiful, by the way. I didn’t say when you were here. 

You: Thank you  ❤️

Joel: Where are you two going?

You: Some crazy bar downtown. Called Cowgirls? I think?

Joel: Don’t get too wild now  😉

You: I’m always going to be a good girl for you, you know that

Joel: Don’t get me started, baby. The outfit was already too much for me tonight

You: If you’re lucky, I’ll let you take this dress off of me sometime  😘

Joel: Not if I’m lucky

Joel: I will be taking that dress off of you

You start to feel flush, knowing that if this conversation continues you’re going to start getting a little too worked up to handle in the back of this stranger's car, so you breathe out and reign yourself in. Your phone buzzes once more, and you look down at it. 

Joel: Have a great time tonight  🤠

Sofia eyes you curiously with a knowing smile as you have been smiling down at your phone for the last few minutes. 

“I take it he liked the dress?” she asks, a brow arched in curiosity.

“Once again, you were right. He’s dying right now, I just know it,” you laugh.

“As he should be!” Sofia replies. “Don’t think I can’t tell you two just made out behind his door,” she whispers, eyes staring at your mouth. You slowly reach a hand up to touch your lips, and Sofia nods, confirming that your lipstick absolutely needs touching up.

You feel yourself get hot, embarrassed, starting to work on it using your phone camera. “Sorry,” you grumble, and Sofia laughs.

“No need to be sorry. You know I support this, right?” she says, more sincerely now. You glance over at her and catch her eye, smiling gratefully.

“You’ve definitely made that clear,” you tease her, but then sober up a bit. “Thank you,” you tell her, and she returns your beaming smile.

You and Sofia are on your second drink at the bar, plus a shot of tequila when you first got there, so you’re feeling… well, great. This bar is some kind of weird, bar-club hybrid it seems, because they have a small dance floor and music playing, but it seems people are into it, as it’s completely packed. Sofia drags you out and you two dance together, laughing the whole time. You’re feeling fun and alive and sexy and it flows through you with the rhythm of the music. You and Sofia eventually step away for a refill on your drinks and you quickly pull out your phone and open your messages with Joel, knowing it’s a bad idea when slightly inebriated but doing it anyway. 

You: I miss youuuuuuu

You: I like you so muchh

Sofia orders drinks, and a young, attractive guy around your age with dark hair and blue eyes approaches you two and you try not to snort, excited to see Sofia flirting in action. It’s always a highlight of your night to learn some tips from her this way. You pretend to be interested in what he’s saying to you two, but then your phone goes off, vibrating in your bag.

Joel: Oh so we’re having lots of fun already, huh?

You: So fun I love Sofia so much we’re dancing and it’s the best

You: But I haven’t fucked you in two days and I’mm sad  🥺🥺🥺

Joel: We’ll fix that problem soon, baby… Just try to enjoy your night

You: But I’m being your good girl. Some guy is talking to us and I don’t caree cause I like you 

You: Wanna feell you inside me

Joel: That’s all you’re thinking about, huh? Insatiable girl

You: Ignoring him to text you.. Sofia is a better flirt than me anyways and you’re hotter

Joel: Be my good girl and stop taunting me or else I’ll have to come there and fuck you in that sexy dress

You: Then I’m badddddd so you’ll come fuck me

You don’t get a response from Joel, so you sigh and put your phone away, tuning into the conversation at hand. You’re jumping in at a completely random spot, the guy hitting on Soph seems to completely have given up on you, and you don’t blame him as you’ve been on your phone the last few minutes looking completely uninterested. You catch Sofia’s eye and give her a wink before feeling just tipsy enough to get on the dancefloor by yourself. You don’t know how much time has passed but you’re enjoying the hell out of yourself while vaguely keeping an eye on Sofia in case she needs an out from this conversation. Either way, the Gemini in her loves an opportunity to hone her flirting skills, even if it doesn’t lead anywhere. 

You suddenly feel a pair of arms wrap around you, and you almost thrash a little, unable to believe that someone would be so forward with you, but then you remember you are out at a kind of skeevy bar. You know you’re not taken, technically single, you suppose. but you don’t want a random stranger, you want Joel. You blink hard and furrow your brow when you turn to chew this person out but stop short when you see it is Joel. He looks so damn good, a beautiful glow on his skin from all the time he spends outside, his dark hair is brushed off his face and into slightly messy, curling swoops over the top of his head. He has on dark jeans and a white linen button up shirt, sleeves rolled up to his elbows and the first few buttons undone. You can barely believe someone could look so sexy as you ogle him.

“Wh- Joel?” you say, feeling your quickly blinking eyes go wide. You know you’re drunk, but not so drunk you’d imagine him there, right?

“Come here, baby,” he says, leaning down to kiss you, swaying with the beat for a moment as he holds you and slides his tongue into your mouth. You melt into it, feeling everything soften as you bite his lip gently. Joel brushes his fingers through your hair, landing on the back of your head and pulling you even deeper into the kiss.

“What’s goin’ on here mister?” you slur, giggling slightly, and the look Joel gives you makes you stomach flip. He’s amused but turned on, you can see just by the way his eyes are lighting up right now. He leans in close now, his lips right next to your ears, and you breathe in with anticipation for his next words.

“If you haven’t learned by now, baby, I don’t know how to tell you. I don’t say things I don’t mean. So when I say if you don’t stop tauntin’ me then I’m going to come fuck you in this dress, I fuckin’ mean it,” he says, every word charged with pent up desire and lust. You breathe out shakily, and before you can craft a response through your slower, tipsy mind, Joel suddenly threads his fingers through yours, pulling you through the crowd of people. You’re following along blindly, still a bit stunned by his words and the fact that he actually came.

He pulls you into a bathroom, and you open your mouth to say something, but still find that nothing is coming out. A few people eye you from the sinks as he pulls you along and into a stall, and you give them an anxious, apologetic look, despite the fact that they look slightly impressed by what’s going on.

Joel latches the door behind you two and dives in, his lips immediately on yours, then trailing down to your neck. You’re definitely still buzzed, and the haze of it is adding to the moment, feeling like you’re just able to be completely free and let Joel do this to you without any worries. You let out a breathy moan as he flicks his tongue right at the top of your neck, near your ear. 

“I’ve missed you,” you breathe out. Despite it being barely even days since you’d last truly spent any time together, you’d already gotten too used to seeing him as often as you were. 

“So I’ve heard. What’d you miss, sweet thing?” He’s not wasting a moment, his tongue and lips traveling all around your neck and down to your chest now. You arch yourself into him, and one hand reaches up to squeeze your breast while the other squeezes your ass, eliciting a quiet groan from him as he does it.

“Missed being with you,” you say breathless and quiet, trying to keep it as low profile as you can in this very public bathroom. “Missed your big cock inside of me.” You are completely flattened against the wall, leaning your head back while he continues moving his lips over you, using the way you’re exposing your neck more as an opportunity to kiss everywhere he can there.

Joel groans again, pushing his hips into you. “Yeah, I bet you did, my fuckin’ cock hungry girl, wanting to be fucked all hours of the day.”

“Mhm,” you manage to make a noise, and you immediately notice the familiar feeling of your pussy beginning to ache for him, needing exactly what he’s saying. You need to be fucked, and right now. 

“Is that what you want right now, baby? My cock inside of you?” he coos, and you nod, your eyes fluttering shut and head leaning back again as he reaches a hand into the top of your dress and rolls your nipple between his fingers. You try to bite back your moan as his other hand reaches up the bottom of your dress and drags a finger along your cunt outside of your underwear. 

“Yeah…” he groans lightly, feeling your soaked panties. “That’s exactly what you want.” 

You can only continue to nod as he undoes his belt and pants, pulling out his cock. One look at it sends another pulsing wave of desire through you and you press your hips forward towards it. Joel’s hands go underneath your thighs, pulling you up and pressing you even harder against the wall of the bathroom stall, and your breath hitches at how roughly he’s handling you. You help him by pulling your dress all the way up your thighs, and he peers down between the two of you, his already throbbing cock pressing against the fabric of your underwear. Your legs are tightly wrapped around him, pulling his hips in even closer, a silent ask for him to give you what you want.

He grunts, pulling your panties to the side and pushing his hips forward, the head finding your entrance and pushing in hard. You whimper and cry out, trying to bite down the sounds that threaten to come out of you as he slams his cock into you. 

“Had to check that you’re still being a good girl for me tonight,” he says with a thrust of his hips, and you find that you like his obsession, his possession of you. You and him both know that you’d do anything to keep him calling you that, but the fact that he came all the way here because he couldn’t stand the sight of you in that dress without fucking you has your head spinning. You both have your vices, it seems.

“And am I?” you gasp desperately in a hushed tone.

His hips drive into you, sending him deeper and deeper, and you’re falling apart by the second. 

“Oh yeah, look at you, taking all of me like that like the good girl you are,” he answers, looking down between your bodies and watching his cock enter you over and over. You shudder at his praises, wrapping your arms tighter around his neck and bringing your head closer to him. He’s thrusting so hard, the build up of wanting this for the last few days taking over, and it’s no surprise when he starts to hit that spot inside of you that you love and crave. 

“F-fuck Joel, oh my god,” you cry out, feeling yourself already wanting to clench around him. 

“Already gonna come for me, sweet girl? Guess you did miss me,” he says with a smirk, and to devastate you further he reaches in between you two and rubs your clit, sending your hips lurching. 

“Joel, I can’t…” you whimper, feeling a desperation rising up in you, more intense than usual. You claw at his back, trying not to release the loud moans that sit in your throat, so you reach a fist to your mouth and bite down. 

“Oh baby, you can, look at how good you’re taking me, just let it out,” he praises, not letting up on his pace as he breathes and grunts with every single slam into your hips. “Let me feel you come on this cock, c’mon,” he urges you, rubbing your clit furiously as he pounds into you. 

It’s an explosion, the pressure releasing as you shudder onto him, his hand holding you tightly against him and the wall behind you as your cunt squeezes around his cock, sending Joel moaning as well. He’s continuing his thrusts, pressing on your g-spot over and over with each one, and you almost feel like you could die with how intense this feels right now. He grunts, the feeling of you spasming around him sending him over the edge as well, and you feel him coming as his hips press all the way against you, his warmth pouring into you. You’re moaning into your clenched fist, seeing stars behind your closed eyelids and suddenly you feel something else. Like a gushing of something, almost like you’re peeing but not quite. Holy shit, you think with a chuckle as you come down from your climax, breathing heavily onto Joel’s chest. 

“Damn, baby, did you just…squirt?” Joel chuckles, with a deeply satisfied grin on his face. 

“I think so? Oh my god.” You let out a little laugh, still feeling the glow of your orgasm washing over you. He sets you down onto your shaky legs and you feel like a complete mess between your own wetness and Joel’s cum running out of you. Joel hands you some toilet paper with a sly grin and you try and wipe yourself off a bit. 

“Never done that before?” he asks, leaning his forehead on yours.

You shake your head. “Never.”

“Good,” he says simply, tilting your head up for a kiss. “You know I like bein’ the only one.”

“I know,” you whisper, kissing him again. “I always want you to be the only one too.” You quickly realize through your drunken fog that what you’ve said could be completely misconstrued and scare Joel off or something. It’s true, you do want him to be the only one you’re seeing, but you don’t think that’s the agreement. You try to backtrack, slurring your words. “Th- the only one to, y’know, make me squirt in a gross bathroom.”

Joel chuckles, holding your cheek. “It’s okay, baby, I get it.”

You stare for a long moment into his eyes, so unreadable right now. Maybe you’re just imagining things, that he didn’t think the same way about your words as you did. 

“Why don’t you go back out, I’ll be behind ya in a minute,” Joel finally says, and you force a smile to your lips and leave the stall. 

You make your way back to the bar, where Sofia is still flirting with her random guy, sipping on her drink that he likely bought for her. You wrap your arm around her shoulder, squeezing her, and she turns enough to glance over at you. She does a double take, and then quickly excuses herself from her new handsome interest sitting at the bar.

“What’s all this? Did you just fuck someone?” she stares wide eyed, palms out in front of her as if to steady herself. She takes you in with her eyes as they dart to different parts of your body.

“What’re you even talking about?” you slur a little. 

“Um, your hair is insane, your lipstick is… I don’t even want to get into that, and your dress is literally off kilter right now. I know a freshly fucked look when I see one.” She crosses her arms.

“Maybe I was dancing really hard,” you tease, and she smirks at you. You’re about to respond with the truth, when you feel two strong arms come from behind you and wrap around the front of your chest followed by Joel’s body leaning down into you until his chin is resting on your shoulder. The scent and feel of Joel immediately fills your senses and you give a guilty look over to Sofia, who has her mouth hanging open slightly. 

Sofia scolds you, using your full name like an angry mother. “I can’t believe you two!” she says playfully. 

“I didn’t ask him to come, he just…” you try to explain, knowing that you did practically ask him to meet you here in a way.

“Yeah right, I’d hope you asked him to come just now,” she calls out to you, chuckling at her own cleverness. You reach forward and push her, giggling in the way you only do when you’re tipsy. 

“Sorry to interrupt girls night, but I heard you had your own man at the bar, so I figured,” Joel says, leaning even further over your shoulder to project his voice enough for Sofia to hear him. The rumble of his voice next to your ear always ends up sending a little shiver down your spine.

“I can’t even be mad because you two look so sexy together right now. And lord knows my best friend needs to get laid.” Sofia shakes her head, staring between you and Joel. You scoff playfully in disbelief, and Joel seems a little speechless at your friend's forward attitude. 

“Well thanks for understandin’, and the compliment, I think.”

“So, are you some kind of stalker or something? I just need to check, since you showed up here,” Sofia asks suddenly, raising her eyebrows at Joel, resting her elbow on the bartop and placing her cheek in her hand as she looks him over.

“Stalker?” Joel laughs. “Lord, no. Just wanted to check on my girl,” he says, squeezing his arms a little tighter around you. The words ring through your head over and over, and you’re having a hard time focusing. My girl, he’d said, and it makes your heart feel like it’s skipping inside of your chest. 

“Did more than check on her,” Sofia mumbles back, and both you and Joel chuckle.

“Alright, I’ll shoo now, you two have fun.” He squeezes you and kisses the top of your head, but when he pulls away you turn your head, grab the collar of his shirt and pull him back down. You kiss him long and deep, sliding your tongue into his mouth. Joel pulls off, shaking his head with that devilish grin he does when he’s turned on and forces himself to step back. 

“Bye, ladies,” he calls out, and you watch him walk away. You reluctantly turn your head back to Sofia, who you know is going to have so much to say to her. Her expression is pure gold, and you immediately laugh at the way her head is tilted slightly down, mouth hanging open, eyes blinking dramatically. 

“Don’t even say it,” you warn her, lifting a finger in warning, and she presses her lips together. “Yeah yeah, it was hot, I know,” you add with a roll of your eyes. 

“So fucking hot,” she confirms, reaching for her drink again as she shakes her head. 

Sofia turns herself towards you in the dark, her eyes more serious than normal. You two are laying in your bed with the TV on in the background, trying to fall asleep after coming down from your buzz. You’d made several stops after Cowgirls and drank a hell of a lot more, but it’s been a few hours, long enough to still feel pleasant but at least you’ve got some of your wits about you again.

“Can I ask you something?” she says, and you wince a little, having a feeling on what’s coming next.

“Sure,” you say, keeping your eyes glued to the TV.

“Do you have feelings for him?”

You sigh and hold back your answer for a few quiet moments. “I don’t know, maybe…” You look towards her, hoping to convey the confusion you’re feeling in your eyes. “I don’t think he’d feel that way about me, so I’m trying really hard not to.”

“Why the hell wouldn’t he feel that way about you?” she says with a scoff.

“He seemed really quick to agree that things were casual with us. I don’t know. He’s never said anything more about it. We just… fuck, mostly. And hang out sometimes, I guess”

“Hmm,” Sofia thinks for a beat. “He looks at you in a certain way, like more than just lusting after you.”

“What? No he doesn’t. He only came to see me tonight because he wanted to have sex with me. Which is fine, that’s kind of what we agreed to, I think.”

“Or… he could want to fuck you and just want to see you because he likes being around you,” she counters, and you know she’s technically right, but you don’t want to believe it even a tiny percentage for fear of being wrong. So you shrug in response, finding it unlikely. Not that you think Joel doesn’t want to be around you, just that he wouldn’t have much of a reason to if you didn’t like your body, too.

“I know the whole friends with benefits thing can be kind of confusing sometimes,” Sofia says, rolling her entire body so that she’s fully facing you now. You do the same and you look at each other, ignoring the voices coming from the television now. You sigh, feeling a few tears prick behind your eyes. Damn it, Sofia is always good at breaking down your barriers like this, and the alcohol isn’t helping.

“I don’t want to be wrong,” you state simply, and she nods, understanding your meaning. “And I don’t even know what I’d want to do with my feelings. What, are we supposed to be an official couple or something? It feels ridiculous to even think about.”

“I mean, you two wouldn’t be the first people with an age gap to be together like that,” Sofia states plainly.

“I do like him, Soph,” you say quietly, feeling the tears stinging again. Something about being with one of your closest friends, someone so understanding and encouraging, is really turning on the waterworks for you. “Aside from the obvious stuff about him being insanely good at fucking me, he’s so… great. He never made me feel pressured or weird about our age stuff, and he does sweet stuff for me, like paying attention to things I like, treating me so well. What the hell does it all mean from him, you know?” you spill out, unable to stop this need to share all the thoughts that have been tumbling through your head recently. Sofia hums, thinking, and you continue.

“Like, he wanted to see me to have lunch, in a park… just to see me. But then the next moment he’s looking at me like I’m only a fucking meal and I start to doubt myself again… what am I supposed to do?” You groan and run your hands over your face, wanting to scream into your pillow. You had never expected this to go so far - you hadn’t even thought past just getting him to notice you, honestly. It’s been one step at a time with this whole situation, and now you’re feeling like you’re quickly approaching some kind of crossroads with Joel.

“Oh, babe, you really are in deep. And it sounds like he might be too, whether he realizes it or not,” Sofia replies. You chew on your inner lip, wanting her to be wrong because it would just be so much less painful.

“I don’t think I can risk saying any of this to him, though,” you tell her, shaking your head. “I don’t want to lose him, I’m already so… addicted,” you admit, cringing at the last word.

“Addicted or not, I think you should tell him. That, or you have to accept what you two are doing is just that, and nothing more.” Sofia purses her lips and gives you a sympathetic look.

“I hate when you’re right,” you say with a scowl.

“That must be tough, considering I’m right one hundred percent of the time,” she says with a laugh, prompting one from you as well. Sofia reaches over and drapes her arm around you, squeezing you tightly.

“No matter what, I’ll be here. I do hope he’s devastatingly in love with you, though.”

“Okay, don’t put ideas in my head,” you say, smacking her on the arm. The thought of that alone could send you spiraling. Joel loving you in any capacity seems far fetched, as you aren’t even sure what your feelings are for him besides fucking terrifyingly strong. But if someday he did… what then?

“Sorry. You guys would make a cute couple though, honestly. People might freak about the age thing, but if that’s what you both want, then I say why not? Fuck what anyone else thinks,” Sofia says with a defiant look on her face, one you’ve seen many times when she’s dedicated to a cause or idea.

“Easier said than done,” you say with a small shrug.

“Very true. So what do you want, hm?” she asks, trying to coax some finality out of you in this conversation.

“I just want… him. All the time. He’s invaded my fucking brain and I don’t even know anything else anymore. I just want to be with him any chance I can.”

“Good dick will do that to you,” she says, chuckling. “And also feelings,” she adds on more seriously.

“Feelings…”

“Yes, feelings. Feelings that you should definitely confess to him someday if you think he might have them back.”

“I’m too drunk to consider him having real feelings for me,” you say, rolling over and crushing your face into your pillow.

“Want to watch more trashy shit and forget about it for now?” Sofia asks earnestly, and you pop your head up off the pillow and nod at her.

“Yes, please,” you groan, readjusting yourself to face the TV again as Sofia puts on one of your favorite rom-com movies and you two laugh at the predictable drama unfolding in front of you. You’re immensely grateful Sofia knew exactly what you needed in this moment, and wish you could just keep her here in Austin with you for a bit longer to help you figure out what the hell you’re doing.

The next morning, you and Sofia groggily stretch out on your bed with mild hangovers plaguing you both.

“I want a fucking egg sandwich,” Sofia croaks out, the first thing spoken between you two for the day. That’s her go to hangover food - egg, cheese, and bacon on any kind of carb, but preferably a huge bagel.

You laugh, rolling over to check your phone. “We’ll get you your egg sandwich, princess,” you tell her, brushing your tangled hair out of your face as the screen lights up on your phone. “Oh, Joel texted me,” you announce. Sofia perks up a little, placing her head on your shoulder and trying to see your phone screen.

“Aww!” she coos, seeing Joel’s message inviting you both over for breakfast to cure your hangovers. “We’re going, right?” she says, the sleepiness in her voice now replaced with excitement.

“Uh…” you start, thinking for several beats. “Maybe…”

“This is some boyfriend shit right here, I see what you’re talking about. Fucking you in a bathroom and leaving, and then making you and your friend breakfast? That’s mixed signal central right there,” Sofia says, completely ignoring your half-assed protest. She stands up, heading to the bathroom as she’s talking.

“Exactly!” you exclaim. “I have no idea what the hell he wants from me.” You hear Sofia rustling through her things in the bathroom before she starts brushing her teeth. 

“Well we’re going, so get ready,” she tells you, voice muffled from the toothbrush in her mouth. You groan a little, sliding out of the bed and joining her in the bathroom to get ready. You shoot Joel back a confirmation that you’ll be over in a bit, and half regret it, not sure what you’re about to get yourself into. Sure, it was entertaining watching Sofia interact with Joel last night, but in the light of day you don’t know if you can handle her questioning him.

Twenty minutes later, you’ve both brushed your teeth, thrown on your lounge clothes, and combed your hair out, barely able to bother with much else through the pounding headaches that have been creeping up on you. You urge Sofia to quietly head down the stairs with you and around the fence to Joel’s yard, trying to avoid getting in the sight of any larger windows in your parents place. She giggles a little, absolutely loving the drama of it all and you roll your eyes but can’t help but laugh because it really is ridiculous. 

You tap on Joel’s backdoor when you see him in the kitchen beyond. A cocky grin is on his face as he slides the door open and beholds the two of you. 

“Oh, there are some fresh faces,” he quips, pressing his lips together to avoid laughing at your tired looks.

“Watch it, we will bite if prompted,” Sofia says, baring her teeth at him humorously.

Joel’s eyes are completely on you when he says “Hope so,” and Sofia groans immediately.

“Ew, guys, it’s literally too early for that,” she replies, sauntering further into Joel’s kitchen and taking a seat at the counter when he offers up the seats to you two. You sit down next to her and rest your head on her shoulder. You’re beginning to wonder why you thought this was about to be a mild hangover when you first woke up. Joel pours two cups of coffee and slides them over to you and Sofia, then goes to his fridge and pulls out a container of creamer, and your mouth drops open slightly. It’s the type of creamer you’d told him that you like the other morning, and he went and fucking bought it in case you were having coffee here? You give him a knowing smile and soft eyes as he passes the creamer to you, willing him to understand just how much this small moment means to you. 

“Alright, ladies, what’re we having?” Joel asks, leaning on his elbows across from you on the island. 

“What, we get to order like we’re at a restaurant?” You laugh, adding cream to your coffee and stirring it. Sofia does the same and you both take big sips, that first taste of coffee breathing a bit of life back into you. 

“I’ve got pancake mix, eggs, toast, some sausages,” Joel lists off, and Sofia perks up. 

“Do you have bacon and a huge ass bagel?” Sofia asks hopefully, leaning forward in excitement. 

“I do have bacon, but it’s a no on the bagel. How ‘bout an english muffin?”

Sofia puts on a thinking face for a moment with a slight scowl. “Okay, deal.”

“Her favorite hangover food is a breakfast sandwich,” you tell him, and Joel nods in agreement. 

“That’s a good one for a hangover, alright,” he replies, now looking at you. “What about you, darlin’?” Joel asks, and you feel Sofia slap your leg excitedly under the counter at his pet name. You want to slap hers back hard in protest, but you decide not to cause a scene in front of Joel. 

“Same is fine with me. Bacon egg and cheese.”

“Alright, gimme a little bit. In the meantime tell me about your big night,” Joel says. 

“Ugh, so fun,” Sofia begins to answer. “I wish I didn’t have to fly back later today,” she says sadly. 

“Shortest visit ever,” you gripe, leaning your head on her shoulder again. 

“I know, my job literally has me by the balls right now, it’s hard to get any time off,” she rolls her eyes, and you see Joel shoot her an amused look. 

“How about that guy at the bar, huh?” Joel asks playfully. 

“I scared him away from her,” you say, frowning dramatically.

“He wasn’t going to fuck me in the bathroom anyways, so what was the point, you know?” she teases, looking at you with raised eyebrows. You see Joel practically choke on nothing across the room as he’s cracking eggs into a pan and you furrow your brows, looking Sofia in the eyes with a warning look.

“That feels like a personal attack,” you snort. 

“Agreed,” Joel chimes in, not looking over, and something about the way this conversation is flowing tugs at your heart. The way Joel is making you and Sofia breakfast sandwiches like it’s the most convenient thing for him, and how they’re getting along so well, despite you being able to tell Joel thinks Sofia is out of her mind in the best way. You feel like you’re going to burst, you can’t remember the last time you felt so happy in a moment. 

“Thank you so much, Joel, seriously,” Sofia says fifteen minutes later as Joel hands you two plates with a steaming, delicious looking breakfast sandwich, standing there with one of his own. He slides over a bottle of painkillers for your headaches and smirks. “You’re one of the good ones,” she adds, pointing a finger at him. 

You can’t help but smile even wider at her comment being so right before taking a bite of the meal Joel made for you two. It’s so good, just like the other few things he’s cooked for you recently. The man knows how to season his food perfectly, at the very least. 

“Yessss,” Sofia groans out as she takes her first bite. You’ve seen this same reaction many times after a night out together when she finally gets her craving fulfilled. 

“So good, thanks,” you say a bit more shyly than Sofia. Joel looks pleased that you both are enjoying everything so much, and his eyes are soft and kind as they watch you for the rest of your meal together. 

Sofia even dares a hug with Joel when you go to leave a while later, and despite his raised eyebrows, he goes in for the hug, patting her on the back. 

“You’re a little wild, but I like ya. I can tell you take good care of our girl here,” Joel states when they break the hug. There it is again, his words claiming you as his, as part of his life in a significant way. His girl, you ring the words through your head several times to see how they feel. 

Sofia smiles brightly and links her arm in yours, breaking you out of your thoughts. “I could say something so inappropriate about you taking care of her too, but I won’t,” she laughs, and you look over at her as if to say you just did anyways.

“Nice to meet you,” Sofia says, waving to Joel as you leave, and he returns the sentiment. He winks at you when you turn to get one last look before sliding the door shut behind you.

You’re restless now, laying awake after lounging all day. You and Sofia spent the rest of the morning debriefing from your night out, and all the stops you made after Cowgirls, remembering only portions of it. You switched to binge a new drama that you promised to only watch the rest of if you were on the phone together before she had to finish packing up to go to the airport. 

You drop her off, and a few tears are shed with both of you promising to call and text constantly, and once again, you’re alone and friendless in Austin. Having Sofia leave definitely strengthens your resolve to try and make some friends in this new city. 

But now, you’re lying awake, feeling slightly sorry for yourself as you try to read and wind your mind down for the night. But truthfully, you can only think of Joel, and how you wish he were here, even if just to be here while you read. You just want his warm body next to yours, reminding you he’s there for you, holding you close to him. You debate for a few minutes before grabbing your phone and typing out a message. 

You: Come over?

Joel: You come here

You: I asked first 😠

Joel: I have treats

You quirk your brow before receiving a photo of ice cream containers in Joel’s freezer, which makes you laugh. Food is definitely his favorite way of taking care of others, you’ve officially concluded.

You: Fine… be there in 5

You are there in less than five minutes, Joel opening the door and pulling you into his arms immediately. You breathe into his chest, the inviting, comforting scent of him instantly lifting your mood. You’d stay buried in this chest, smelling him forever if you could. He kisses your head and holds you longer, sensing your hesitation to pull away. 

“What’s goin’ on baby, you feelin’ down about Sofia?” He rocks your body a little and you nod. 

“I just love having her around, and I’m tired as hell, but I can’t sleep,” you mumble into his chest. 

“Poor little thing. I’ll take care of ya,” he teases slightly despite meaning it. “C’mon in.” Joel pulls you into the living room, settling you onto the couch before disappearing and then reappearing with the ice cream and two spoons. 

“You like cookie dough?” he asks, showing you the carton with that flavor listed on the front before sitting down next to you. 

“Hell yeah,” you reply, tucking yourself in close to him, your spoon fighting to get into the ice cream. 

“Patience, sweet girl,” he chides, opening the lid and seal of the carton, and you laugh. As soon as it’s open, he offers it to you and you take a large spoonful, a light moan of delight slipping out as it hits your lips. 

“Keep makin’ noises like that and see what happens.” Joel looks at you with lifted brows, taking a spoonful of the ice cream for himself. 

“Ha ha,” you tease back. “Wouldn’t you like that.”

“Wouldn’t you?” he counters.

“I would,” you say plainly, daring him with your lifted eyebrows, sucking on the spoon a little longer than normal as you have another bite of the ice cream. 

Joel laughs and shakes his head. “Swear, you are always pushin’ me, girl,” he says.

“Not my fault everything I do makes you want to fuck me,” you tease confidently.

“Oh, isn’t it?” he quips back, nudging you with his arm.

“Anyway, I’m just here to eat ice cream and watch TV, so…” you tilt your head with a sweet, unassuming smile and then turn your attention towards the TV and grab the remote before Joel can. Joel growls in his throat, half irritated and half amused at your teasing, but he lets it go for now.

“Fine then, don’t come to me beggin’ later,” he smirks, and you roll your eyes.

“Wait. Joel, have you been watching Lover’s Paradise since you saw it at my place?!” you blurt out incredulously, a wide grin on your face as you stifle a laugh. You can see on his most recently streamed shows that he’s a couple episodes deep into one of the seasons.

“W-well, you showed me just a little, and I’m a naturally curious guy, so y’know. One thing leads to another…” he rambles on, looking embarrassed at your discovery.

“This is turning out to be the best night ever, actually,” you reply, loving the sheepish look on his face. For once, for god damned once, he’s the one acting completely tripped up with you, you rather than the other way around. You click on the next episode and set the remote down, leaning back into Joel with the smug smile still plastered on your face.

“Stop it,” he growls when he notices your overly pleased expression.

“Nope,” you counter with a little delighted shake of your head.

“Alright, quiet now so I can see what Victoria and Henry have been up to,” he says, and you double over with laughter before you can even stop yourself. 

“Yes sir,” you say, sitting back again and pinching your lips to try and keep more laughter from slipping out.

It’s not until Victoria throws a drink on Henry and then slaps him that Joel has a reaction and starts speaking again.

“Now that’s just crazy,” he says, stunned. The man has clearly not watched enough reality TV if this kind of behavior is shocking to him. “She slapped him for what again?” he leans forward, pointing his spoon at the screen and holding the ice cream container in the other. His eyes are glued on the TV and brows furrowed, and it’s such an amusing sight it sends you laughing again.

“He was talking about her behind her back, duh. Are you even watching?” you reply with sass.

“I am, there’s just a lot goin’ on, it’s hard to follow.” Joel huffs in response, still avidly watching the screen to piece more of it together. You can’t believe how seriously he’s taking this right now. Here you are, trying to avoid your feelings for him when he pulls adorable things like this and makes you want to smash your lips on his and tell him to watch reality TV with you forever. 

“You sweet, sweet man, you will soon learn the ways of trashy reality TV,” you say with a dramatic flair. Joel tries to shush you again, so you wrap your arm around his chest and angle your head towards the show while it rests on his shoulder, craving closeness with him but not wanting to distract him further. His hand comes up to your arm, tracing back and forth along it to your hand as he watches. When the episode ends, he looks down at you, a questioning look on his face.

“Start the next one,” you say, answering his silent question. He smiles down at you before you two focus back in for another episode. Several hours later, you’re dozing onto his chest while Joel has watched two more episodes of Lover’s Paradise, staying equally invested through each one, and that’s when you know you’ve created a monster.

He nudges you and plants a kiss on your head. “You up, darlin’?” he asks quietly, and you stir, knowing you’ve been half sleeping for the last hour, coming in and out of consciousness trying to follow what was happening on Lover’s Paradise.

“Oh, s-sorry,” you mumble, sitting up and off his chest. Joel puts an arm around you and rubs your back.

“S’alright, glad you got some shut eye. Want to come upstairs with me?” he asks. You blink sleepily at him and nod, slowly standing up from the couch and trailing behind him. Your heart lurches in your chest when you see the bright pink toothbrush you used the last time you slept here is in a little cup by the sink, and you have to fight not to have an overt reaction to its presence. Instead, you grab it and begin brushing your teeth like this is a completely normal occurrence - you having things at Joel’s house.

“For you to sleep in, if ya want,” Joel says as you come out of the bathroom. He hands you one of his shirts to wear, an old looking college football one. You strip your own shirt off, revealing your lack of bra underneath, but you figured Joel had already noticed that much. He sucks in a breath, watching you unabashedly as you’re half naked before tossing his shirt over your head. You strip off your shorts and place all of your clothing on the same chair he had used last time. In the meantime, Joel has gotten into his bed, leaning back on the headboard as he’s been observing you.

“Look so damn good in here, baby, just doin’ your thing,” he says as you approach the free side of the bed and start to climb in.

“Oh stop,” you say, waving him off. Joel reaches up to his bedside lamp and turns it off, and you quickly do the same before laying down.

“Definitely not doing that,” he retorts, and you let out a giggle as he snatches you into his arms as he says it. You lay in the dark, feeling the warmth from Joel’s body seeping into yours. He’s laying in only his briefs now, and you like that you know how he sleeps. You revel in his bare chest underneath your hand as you trace your fingers along it.

“Thanks for everything tonight, I feel way better than I did earlier,” you tell him sincerely, giving his shoulder a quick kiss.

“What I’m here for - makin’ you feel good, baby” Joel replies. “In all kinds of ways.”

Your eyes are already closed, the heaviness of sleep keeping them from opening again despite your desire to look up at Joel. “Is that so?” you mumble into his shoulder.

“It is, but right now, I’m makin’ you feel good by letting you get some sleep,” he says, forgoing the flirty avenue the conversation was about to turn down.

“N-no, need to stay up with you,” you half slur out of sleepiness, attempting to blink your eyes open a few times.

Joel simply shushes you, rubbing his hand along your back in soothing strokes. “Sleep, sweet girl,” he commands in a soft, quiet voice, and as usual, you find yourself doing exactly what he asks of you as you give in to the sleep your tired mind is fighting for.