#joel: take it while I'm jumping so I look taller

[after-nine-at-the-oasis]

this hermit group picture made me remember that Joel's a hermit and just AAAHHHH :')))

[total-dxmure]

i'm super late to react about the tlou casting debacle, however you all know that i have strong opinions.

i'm sure that the actress who has been cast is incredibly talented, however i'm still extremely disappointed.

abby's looks are incredibly important to the entire storyline of the second game, and i had hopes that they would do her complexities justice. the writers used her stature and build as a serious plot device and let me tell you why:

she's taller than ellie. she's stronger than ellie. she's better trained than ellie.

does this stop her from continuously pitting herself against the woman? no. she is quite literally a cornered, feral animal. showing teeth and aiming for the jugular. it is not tenacity that we are seeing in ellie. it is pure, unadulterated rage. it singlehandedly burns her up from the inside out. nothing exists for her anymore except a singular goal and that is wiping out everyone who not just had a hand in killing joel but also had any relationship to those people. she's hunting them like prey.

we are supposed to look at abby and be scared. we are supposed to look at abby and think her capable of possibly besting ellie. we are supposed to see her, towards the beginning, as the "big bad evil guy". most of us are completely blind to the parallels when we're knee deep into the game because we love joel.

but that's when the shift happens. when you suddenly see abby in ellie's shoes. she's someone who just wanted to avenge the death of her father and all of his comrades.

though it was too late to save joel, ellie is murdering countless people in the name of someone she loves. she resented him for what he did to save her, and yet when faced with a similar situation she jumps head first into it without hesitation.

abby and ellie both had complete and utter tunnel vision. abby, who wanted to avenge her father and find the fireflies. ellie, who needed to make everyone pay for what they did to joel. both of them destroyed their own lives in their pursuits.

one of the most, if not the most emotional scene in the entire gameplay is the final showdown between abby and ellie. we see a weak (emaciated) abby fighting for her life against a strong, now incredibly skilled ellie. the role reversal is breathtaking.

this is why abby's looks mean so much. it is a testament to the absolute soul crushing sorrow that the both of them endured. most of which were mutually inflicted onto each other.

abby could have taken advantage of ellie's weaknesses and killed her in that theater, just as ellie could have done with abby.

ellie ends up turning into the very person that she hates most and her worst fear comes to life. she ends up alone.

the worst part of it all is that we know that joel wouldn't have wanted her to take any sort of revenge. she was living a happy, simple life with dina. the kind of life that joel had wanted for himself and for her. she can't even play guitar in order to feel connected to the man that had become her father.

he had died without her forgiveness. she is forced to live with that, all while being unable to forgive herself for what she has done.

and not to break anyone's hearts even more, but did anyone else catch the flowers that ellie put on joel's grave? blue hydrangeas. in the language of flowers they mean "forgiveness and regret".