#just the staring openly and the unhidden desire

[darkmindsotome]

His Secret

MLQC Victor short for the festive period because it was in my head. I hope you all enjoy it. 

Warnings: A little dash of pumpkin spice to this one. 

Darkmindsotome Masterlist

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His Secret

He had control over a lot of things. His life was a systematic methodical regime of everything neatly ordered and in moderation. His schedule was planned to the millisecond and he knew almost exactly what others were going to say or do around him based on his own actions. It was logical, it was familiar… it was boring.

That was where fate provided a small twist in his long life. A scatter-brained, slightly ditzy female that exceeded his expectations, although not always in the best fashion. Comments had been tossed around the rumour mill about the type of woman he would be interested in. Models, actresses, daughters of highly successful businessmen and politicians. They couldn’t be further from the truth. He found himself unable to look the other way when this one was involved. No matter the situation he observed them from a distance and stepped in only when he was asked too. The last part was harder than it seemed as the curiously fascinating female was stubborn enough to struggle for what felt like eternity without asking for assistance.

What started with curiosity had developed over time into genuine affection, although it appeared that everyone else around them had noticed this except for her. He felt irritation rise inside him knowing that she was oblivious to his feelings but he couldn’t hold it against her as he never spelt it out for her in a way she couldn’t possibly misinterpret. Still, it was becoming increasingly hard to keep a grip on something else he usually dealt with without issue.

He held a secret. It was not something he was proud of and he knew better than to openly display such a thing to the public as it would generate fear and panic. But this time of year was always the worst. When the moon was at its most powerful and the veil between worlds was at its thinnest. Halloween was fast approaching and with it was the one night of the year he usually made every effort to spend alone and locked away from other people. That was his plan this year as well except…

“So, Anna said we should have a company party and invite some of the collaborators, partners and guests that have helped us so far. I could see her point it would help with future negotiations and networking if we could keep everyone on side and then Leo said…” She rambled on with an idiotically cheerful smile on her face. He had been lost in that smile until her lips uttered another man’s name and it felt like he had been plunged into ice water like a freshly cooked egg.

“Leo? You are still talking to him?” He kept his voice low and even willing it to sound calm even as he felt his blood boil.

“Of course I am. He’s a friend as I have already told you AND he is the head of the tv station. We work together on things. It only makes sense to maintain a business connect like that by inviting him to the party and talking to him.” She gave a little huff as she rattled off a naively simple point of view on the topic. He suppressed a sigh as he thought about how she wouldn’t really be her if she knew how dark the world could be. The childlike innocence of her was one of the qualities he found so endearing in her.

“What time and where?” The words were out of his mouth before his brain could catch up.

“What?” Her expression mirrored the same shock that he felt without letting it show on his own face. It was his night alone. The one night he always kept free from social obligations and work so as to maintain his own life balance. He should be thinking about that right now but all his mind was filled with was the notion of her drinking wine surrounded by people and that Leo character moving in closer circles around her like a shark.

“This childish gathering of yours. I will need details so I can get Goldman to add it to the schedule and attend. Or is there some reason you don’t want me there?” The ball was in her court. If she said she didn’t want him there clearly and that she would choose someone else he would let her go.

“N-no. I just didn’t think you would want to attend a Halloween party. I thought you’d dub it as beneath you and totally stupid and say it was a waste of time and not come to it so I thought…” Her cheeks were flushed pink. Yet another expression she had in her arsenal that targeted him but was oblivious as to how to use it to her advantage.

“And there is your problem. Working without proper tools can only ever result in failure.” He crossed his arms over his chest as he leant back in his chair behind his desk and looked at the small female fidgeting. Her innocence really brought out his desire to tease her at times.

“Hey! You know I could tell security to not let you in even if you did show up?” She gave a defiant if rather not completely well thought out rebuttal to his comment.

“And that would be a wise move to pull against your sole investor and financial support to your company because?”

“Well, I…” She stammered and avoided his gaze.

“As I said working without tools can only ever result in failure. So, time and place.”

*

And that was how he ended up silently cursing his own luck under his breath as he arrived at the hotel her company had selected for the night’s festivities. Everywhere he looked grown men and women were dressed up in costumes using the night as a kind of excuse to cut loose and drink far more than sensible. He could feel their heartbeats vibrating inside him even without touching any of them.

She was running around in a witch costume. The black dress clung to her body in all the right places giving her a more mature silhouette than he was used to seeing. He began to get annoyed. She looked impossibly cute, so cute he wished to remove her from all the people ogling her. She was also drinking much more than she knew she could.

he watched as she staggered a few times before she left the room. She was waving off the hands offering assistance as she ventured into gardens to get some fresh air and cool off. He downed his glass of brandy, almost slamming the empty tumbler on the bar counter and followed her.

“What do you think you are doing?” He called out harshly to her when he found her propped up against the trunk of a tree sitting on a bench.

“Victor?” Her voice was full of surprise as she looked up at him with those big eyes.

“Yes, Victor who else did you think it was? Or maybe you were hoping for one of those guys in there instead of me.” He motioned behind him back in the direction of the party. As if on cue a sudden burst of laughter rang out from the gathering filling the night air.

“No. I just didn’t think you’d follow me.” She sighed and allowed herself to sink further back against the tree. The small hat on her head that was attached to a band slipped a little more to the side of her head.

“Well someone is clearly incapable of hosting a small gathering without making a spectacle of themselves. Idiot.” He muttered that last part softer than the first before taking a seat next to her.

“Ugh…” As she groaned, he just knew it was because he had hit a nerve. She was so easy to read and predict.

“I don’t know why you do it. I can’t tell if you are seriously this naive or if you are just that dense.” His continued criticism of the night was certainly something he was thinking but even he knew he should be drawing the line somewhere. The trouble was with her he couldn’t hold back. No that wasn’t exactly true. He didn’t want to hold back. They were close in age sure but it was more than that. From the moment they met, she had spoken her mind and been frank with him. She was not another Yes man paying lip service to him in the hope of continued funding. He liked that. He loved that.

“Have we already hit the lecture portion of this evening I wasn’t aware it was that time already.”

“What?” He turned to look at her with unhidden wonder. He was used to seeing her stumbling about semi docile and in need of guidance. He was used to hearing small bursts of escaped thoughts during phone conversations but he had never really seen much of this side of her. Humans really were fascinating creatures.

“No. No, what? Listen, Victor, I’ve reached my limit on this. I’m completely capable of doing things without your personal brand of “assisting” which just involves insulting me constantly. I’m not a little girl I’m a grown woman.”

He hadn’t seen her this full of fight in a while. Her pulse was racing and it probably had something to do with the sudden realisation that she had just said what she had to him rather than the alcohol in her system. She looked like someone had tossed ice water on her. Her eyes wide with shocking clarity as she stared at him her hand clamped over her mouth. He would have laughed had this been any other time. But his mind was drifting in time with the beat of her heart.

“I’m going back inside. Be sure to make yourself presentable before returning also.” He went to stand up only to stop when he felt the weight of something on his jacket. Her small hand was gripping him as her face continued to flicker between confusion and anger.

“Wait.”

“Let go of me.” He moved his hand to hers and teased it from him. His fingers grazing over her wrist reminded him of how quickly her heart was pounding.

“I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said what I did like that.” The fire she showed before seemed to be gone and she was back to being meek. It was a look that hurt him more tonight than at any other time. If she wanted to stand strong in business and continue her dream, she had to have fire.

“Why are you apologising?” He sighed and frowned as he looked at her bowing her head to him.

“What?” She looked up probably a little shocked that he wasn’t agreeing that she had been very rude to him. She still didn’t understand that things like this didn’t affect him.

“Why apologise for saying something that you have clearly been thinking about for a long time? It’s pointless. It wastes energy and time. Now let go before you make any more of a fool out of yourself.” He said his piece aware of how his mouth was watering. He had to get away.

“No. Not until you tell me why you are running away.” She stubbornly refused to let him go almost jumping in front of him to block his retreat.

“I am not running I am returning to the bar some of us are capable of enjoying a drink without it resulting in a public spectacle.”

“Well it looks like you are avoiding me and it hurts.” Her eyes looked glassy as if she was about to cry.

“What?” He stood there in stunned observation. She couldn’t possibly know the danger she was in. How when the scent of her shampoo in the air blended with her own sweet aroma had his restraint faltering. The faster her heart raced the sweeter it became and he was intoxicated. He knew it wouldn’t take much to break it. All she had to do was show him one little gap in her armour and let him in. “You…”

“It’s fine sorry you’re right I’ve had too much to drink I really don’t know what I’m saying just go back inside and have fun. It’s why you came here after all.” She sounded defeated and stepped aside. He was all too aware of the loss of warmth from her near him and found himself chasing it. He wanted to tell her she was wrong. She wasn’t here because of the drink or the amusement. He wanted to take her in his arms and tell her everything that she loved to hear in those old movies she liked too much.

Instead what happened was a rather passionate sudden kiss. One hand wrapped around her hip as the other naturally found its home at the back of her head cradling it as he dragged her closer to him. She was wide-eyed in shock staring at him as he continued to deepen the kiss pushing his tongue past her lips and teeth to mingle with hers. swallowing her surprised noises along with her pleasurable moans. Her eyelids fluttered shut and his hand on her him snaked around to her back and sides enjoying that mature outline of her body he had seen on display earlier.

Her small hands came up to pat his chest and he released her allowing her to catch her breath. She was glowing in the moonlight. A totally new look present on her face that had his heart skipping as he realised it was a look of lust directed only at him. Her gasp of shock was what snapped him out of his fantasy.

He was suddenly aware of the ivory showing in his mouth. He knew they were there it was as he had feared. He spent so many years hiding his secret from the world only to have it fail him when faced with desire for another. He still had time. He could retreat and leave without saying a thing and if she asked or said anything he could say she was drunk or he was in costume or something. He could do that. But his body was not obeying him and instead remained still as she edged closure to him a single finger reaching out to his lips and touching a fang.

“It’s real…” She whispered her voice holding none of the fear he was expecting.

“Yes.” He looked at her the look in her eyes had changed and he felt his heart sink. There was no going back now it seemed. “I’m sorry I…”

“Does it hurt when they come out like that?” The childlike question caught him off guard. His words stolen from him and all he found he could do was shake his head in reply. “Good. I was worried you were in pain.”

“What?”

“For a moment there you looked like you were really hurting. But if you aren’t then it’s fine.” She smiled the same soft smile he fell for months ago and stayed by his side without fleeing.

“You know what I am. You know what I could do to you and still, you stay?”

“Yes. Because I also know that you won’t hurt me. Regardless of what you are Victor you have never once been cruel.” Her words were resplendent in their conviction as she looked up at him. There were no more secrets here. A weight he never really fully understood had been removed from his chest and he felt light enough to fly.

“You really are an idiot.” He chuckled as he drew her to him and kissed her again softer than before. “I’m not letting you go. Not now you know my secret.”