#listen i love loaded march but true love is also recognizing the problematic parts and the parts you don't vibe with

[rapha-reads]

Loaded March - we're still at it - a reaction

Part 4 - The Jester

He knew that Kay had no family, that he felt just as much an outcast as Merlin, that he clung to Excalibur because he had no one else, and that Excalibur would never let either one of them go.

Kay is my baby and I will kill for him. I'm impatiently waiting for the Kay & Will show. And Bran and Kathy.

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In the quiet that followed the first video, Merlin wondered if he should have tried harder to tell Arthur. But what would Arthur have done then? His only encounter with magic had been bad, and Merlin didn't want Arthur to think that having magic automatically made someone evil. He'd said as much when watching the movies.

Listen. Listen. I'm a sucker for Magic Reveals. I've read them all. And if there's one thing I know, it's that the longer Merlin waits to tell Arthur, the harshest the consequences are. Yes, Arthur gets his head on straight after a while, mostly (there are the MR that do go very badly, but let's focus on the ones where they stay strong together). But a certain amount of time of lies and secrets especially when the opportunity arises to speak... Sours things. I'm just saying. I love Magic Reveal.

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"Not me," Kay said suddenly, standing up slowly, shaking his head. Merlin watched him, a little surprised, because Kay was the last one who would step up first. He was usually last, after he'd analyzed everything nearly as thoroughly as Arthur. Kay's cheeks were flushed now, aware that he had everyone's attention on him, and he shrugged. "You lot know I bounced foster homes until I hit sixteen."

SHUT UP I LOVE KAY OKAY.

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They'd gone a step further. Now they were trusting each other with the impossible, with the unknown, with a challenge that was going to push them above and beyond anything they had ever done before. Arthur never had any doubt that his men were up to the task. It was something else, however, to watch them come to the realization that they were up to that task.

Okay, I'm anti-military by principle, but you offer me the chance to be part of Team Excalibur, I'm jumping on it. IF I was fit and prone to fire arms and patriotic. But yeah, I wanna join the team. That's the true force of LM imo, the depth of the characters and the strength of their bond.

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Gilli looked embarrassed. "I'm having trouble with the language, sir. The programming. I can't get to the source code to upgrade it with the latest."

Ah, shit. The idiot's here. Oooh, this is going to be frustrating. I just don't like Gilli.

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"Magic." He took Arthur's arm and they continued to walk. "The sort of magic that hasn't been seen on the British Isles since the time of King Arthur, the Knights of the Round Table, and Merlin the Magician."

There's literally two guys right now in position of power, one a true leader, the other full of secrets and incomprehensibly powerful, with those exact names, thrown together and already bonded. WHY IS NO ONE COMMENTING ON THAT COINCIDENCE. What? Yes, I know I'm foreshadowing, I've been sitting on that pesky little detail since part 1. HIS NAME IS LITERALLY ARTHUR PENDRAGON AND HE'S DESCENDED FROM OLD MONEY AND OLD ROYALTY. AND MERLIN IS WELSH AND PAGAN. Ffs why is no one even making a joke. Gaaaaah, frustrating.

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The first was to subdue Trickler inside the club -- likely the easiest approach since most of Trickler's people would be outside, or hampered by the crowds, but then again, the crowds would get in the way of Team Excalibur, too. The second option was to lure Trickler outside of the club, and have it out with his people in the open.

Ah. I'm remembering the plan. I'm remembering why The Jester is my least favourite part of it all... Why I tend to start my usual re-readings with part 5 or 6. Hang on to something, it's going to get bumpy.

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The closet was stocked with expensive designer clothing in his size, but someone, somewhere, had failed the fashion coordination course, because that jacket was a dark navy blue, and they did not go with the Armani charcoal trousers.

Why are you such a drama queen, Arthur.

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Yeaaaah, still not liking the plan to grab Trickler. I just don't like it when Merlin is put in the position of the vulnerable, defenseless, submissive one, when he's everything but all of that. That's actually part of the only two problems I have with LM as a whole, one being the sometimes misogynistic language used, the other being the slight dom/sub vibes of Merlin and Arthur. Or I might be remembering their dynamic wrong. Let's see how it goes on.

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Arthur hated Merlin's deference, the way the fight had gone out of him, the absolute, complete subservience that came without so much as a sarcastic yes, sire, angry you bloody pillock or rude gesture. It was an act, though. He knew it was.

Yes, thank you, I hate it too. But damn if it isn't effective. The boys have all of these dumbs eating out of their hands.

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For a brief moment, very brief, Arthur considered being on the receiving end of Merlin's rough treatment, to give in to him, and he found that it was a situation he wouldn't entirely mind being in so long as it was Merlin. He wouldn't do it for anyone else but him.

Okay, I concede, they're on equal footing. I got frustrated earlier.

The whole time Merlin was being dragged by Trickler and not using his magic to defend himself and his team, I wanted to scream.

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Oof, part 4 got long! And it's just the beginning. Stay tuned for part 5!

Part 3b | Part 4 | Part 5