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#maybe it's time i put some actualy thought into the possibility that i'm autistic
jankwritten
·
2 years
Text
hm.
#maybe it's time i put some actualy thought into the possibility that i'm autistic
#because the more i read about it
#the more it becomes very clear that every facet of my mental disorders could. very easily stem from autism in some way shape or form
#my anxiety
#my social anxiety specifically
#my thing about specific noises and foods as sensory related issues
#the way that burnout affects me and also the way that I can't verbalise how things are specifically in my brain
#a lot of my other attributes like my gender/sexuality also align with more autistic behaviors but that's obviously not a telltale sign
#aroace nonbinary people are not all automatically autistic
#i always go in circles with myself about this because my brother has an autism diagnosis
#or at least he has been tested and been given a 'very likely' kind of answer
#but my mom has ADHD
#(her dad and her brother are also suspected to be on the spectrum but they've never been tested)
#but every time I bring up the possibility of me being autistic with ANYONE outside of my friends it immediatley gets shut down
#idk how to feel about it anymore
#but me being autistic would explain so much? but also i don't want people to just think that i'm using that label because it's
#like 'hip' nowadays or whatever the fuck in online spaces for people to self diagnose autism and shit like that
#i'm just really tired of fighting with myself 24/7 about this
#so.
#it's a label i want to be able to use because it makes SENSE and it explains so much about me?
#but i don't know for sure and i don't know if i ever will
#tonight's one of those nights man
#i am once again oversharing on the internet
#the depths of the blog
#not pjo
#not omgcp
#not fandom
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