#no but I'm gonna be laughing at how horrific those cheesy lines were all afternoon

[the-toasted-teacake]

"Lando, I don't think blowjobs behind the bushes count as 'romantic on the green', no?"

"Didn't hear you complaining." Lando's grin turns wicked and Carlos groans, bracing himself. "Guess I just like it spicy, eh?"

"Don't."

"Carlos, will you be my chili pepper?"

Watching Lando laugh himself to tears, smile wide and cheeks aching, Carlos regrets both everything and nothing.

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