#nonincidentally

[witchblade]

the no homofication of ezio auditore di firenze

[nathanbatemanfucker]

Aberration of the Heart: Chapter 8

warnings: jealousy, fluffy fluffy fluffy….kissing

AN: AHHHHHHHHH. that is all.

AOTH MASTERLIST

When you wake up in Derek's arms in the morning you can't help but feel guilty. Guilty because it felt wrong to be with someone else like this when you were haphazardly trying to pursue things with Hotch but also because if there was even a small part of Derek that felt something for you, you were leading him on.

You shake him awake and thank him for taking care of you before you gather your things and head home. After his conversation with Hotch, he's not as confused as he could be on why you leave in a hurry. He thinks that something is going on, he's just not sure how far along it is. He'd let you tell him when you were ready but disappointment lances through his chest. Part of him always thought he had a chance. Maybe he still did but he wouldn't let himself hope too much. He'd treat you just the same, and if things happened between the two of you then they did. That was that.

Most of Friday goes by quickly and nonincidentally. You cuddle with Luna and bake a cake from scratch, needing to ease your mind with the methodical measuring. It smells of sugar and vanilla and lemon when your phone starts to buzz on the counter. You wipe your hands on your apron and pick it up. It's Hotch and your heart nearly stops beating. It's the first time you've spoken without others present since the almost kiss.

"Hi, sir." You speak into the phone timidly.

"It's you." He sounds surprised and you chuckle, tilting your head in confusion even though he can't see you.

"Why wouldn't it be?" You ask as you make your way back to the mess in on the island, picking up the powdered sugar so that you can measure it out for the icing you're putting on the lemon cake.

"Morgan answered last night, said you were sleeping."

You frown. "You talked to Derek last night? On my phone?"

Hotch lets out a frustrated sigh. He wasn't surprised that Derek hadn't told you, not after asking if he was 'sweet on her'. "Yes."

"He didn't mention it." You sound so surprised and he loves and hates your naivety. Of course you don't understand why Derek would keep that information from you, you don't see how he looks at you, at least you didn't before. Talking with Erica had woken you up a bit. But still, you're confused.

"He was supposed to let you know to call me."

"Hmm, he didn't, that's not like him." You muse absentmindedly as you pour powder sugar into a measuring cup and then a bowl.

"I wonder why." He says stiffly.

"Hotch, it's not like that with him, not for me. I was sleeping last night, and he probably just forgot because I rushed out of there this morning." You shrug, propping yourself up on your counter.

"What do you mean?"

"We fell asleep on the couch together and I woke up in his arms." You whisper, guilt washing over you once again.

"Oh, um, I'm not sure I understand why you did what you did." He takes a nervous swallow that even you can hear through the phone.

"Well, it felt wrong to be in his arms when I feel...when you and I are...friends in the way that we are." Finding the right words is a struggle for you.

"I see."

"Me feeling that way doesn't make you uncomfortable does it?"

You can almost hear the gears turning in his head as he attempts to formulate his response. Your mouth is dry, your heart pounding in your chest that you've said the wrong thing, that you've gone too far and assumed too much. But then he starts speaking. "I'm pleased that you feel that way if that's what you mean. I wouldn't want to wake up in anyone else's arms, and I wouldn't want you to wake up in someone else's either. Even if it is Morgan."

A slow smile spreads across your face. You finally felt like you were getting somewhere with him. You hope that the two of you can keep things subtle enough to explore where this is going without meddling from the team. "It won't happen again then, sir."

"Hotch." He corrects. "Good."

"Was there...a reason you wanted me to call you?"

"Yes, I actually wanted to ask you if you'd like to come over and spend some time with Jack and I tomorrow. We could watch a movie or two, or go to the park, or have dinner."

"Why not all of the above?" You offer, biting your lip nervously as you imagine a day with him and his son.

"Well, I didn't want to take up your entire day."

You debate on whether or not you should say what you want to say but end up airing on the side of being bold. "Hotch, I'd love for you to take up my entire day."

And night, you think to yourself.

He chuckles softly and you can picture the bashful smile spreading across his face. "Alright. How does 11 sound?"

"I'll be there. Should I bring anything?"

"No, I've got it covered."

"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow, Hotch."

"I'll see you tomorrow, Y/n."

The scene in both of your apartments are rather similar. You're leaning on the counter a sweet smile on your face. Hotch is in his office, files spread out everywhere but those are the last thing on his mind as he bites away a smile, staring across the room as he thinks about what tomorrow holds.

*

You hesitate for a moment as you stand on the doorstep of Hotch's apartment. You'd driven around the block a few times before finally parking. You were very nervous about spending the entire day with him and Jack, but maybe this would kick things into gear. This could be a step towards the two of you truly acknowledging whatever this friendship really was.

You hear him, more accurately them, before you see them and the door opens, a small head popping out at the bottom. The door opens all the way and you only get to glance at Hotch before Jack is talking.

"Y/n/n!" Jack's face lights up as he squeals your name and you stoop down a little. He was 7, but a bit short for his age so you still felt the need to.

Your heart couldn't help but warm at Jack remembering your nickname. When the two of you had first met he said he liked nicknames and so you offered him a nickname that no one but your parents call you.

"Hi Jackers, how's my bestie doing today?" You ruffle his hair, a wide smile on your face.

"Good! Dad made waffles and he said we get to watch Spider-Man!"

"Waffles and Spider-Man, sounds like quite the day. If you stay up through the whole movie, I'll play with your action figures too. Sound like a deal?"

"Oh I promise, I'll stay up! Come on!" Jack grabs your hand, effectively pulling you up and if it weren't for Hotch reaching forward to steady your hips you would've fallen.

"Hi." He looks down at you, his eyes warm, a lazy smile spreads across his lips.

"Hi, sir." You say shyly and he gives you a pointed look at your formality, given he is holding you like a boss shouldn't hold his subordinate. "Hotch."

"You alright?" He doesn't take his hands off your hips, his fingers scorching your skin through your shirt.

Before you can answer, Jack is pulling you through the apartment to the kitchen. "Y/n/n, there's leftover waffles do you want some?"

"Jack, be thoughtful kiddo." There's a gentility in Hotch's voice that he only uses with Jack. It makes your heart sing.

"Sorry, I just got really excited." Jack shrugs as he struggles to reach the microwave. You quickly see what he needs and raise him up by his hips so that he can get the plate of waffles out of microwave.

"I'm really excited too." You grunt as you set him back on the ground. Though you had eaten shortly before, you didn't want Jack to think you were blowing off his offer so you snatch a small corner off the plate and take a few bites.

"Wait, dad before the movie can I show Y/n/n my new action figures?" The pure hope that shines in Jack's eyes is something you would love to see everyday.

"I don't know buddy, we probably shouldn't take up too much of her day."

"Jack you have me as long as you want me, I told you, I don't have anything else to do today." You mumble as you finish the waffle.

"How about you show her after the movie?" Hotch compromises.

"Promise?"

"Pinky promise, bub." The nickname rolls off your tongue so effortlessly and you feel yourself flush flush looking up at Hotch. His eyes are warm and he gives you a small, but supportive nod.

You and Jack curl up on the couch on the couch with a blanket while Hotch puts the movie in. You expect him to position himself on the other side of Jack but instead he plops down right beside you. It's the first time the two of you have been this close in this manner, his warm chest against your back. The contact initially causes you to shiver and one of his arms comes up to rub your arm, effectively ridding you of goosebumps.

You try really hard, extremely hard to focus on the movie but it's difficult when his hand is either caressing your arm or trailing your waist or grasping your thigh. This touch coupled with the scent of his cologne and the sweetness of the moment takes all of your concentration away. You're happy that you've seen the movie a couple times because you know Jack will ask questions.

During a fight scene where Jack is too mesmerizied to care if one of you speaks, Hotch leans in, moving his lips to your ear. "I'm really glad you're here."

You turn your head slightly, effectively placing your lips just an inch from his. "I am too." You breathe, not breaking eye contact with him. If his son weren’t sitting next to you, you'd kiss him right now.

"Y/n/n, look!"

"I'm looking buddy." You lean down into his shoulder, and strive to pay attention for the rest of the film. Hotch just squeezes your waist, but doesn't say anything.

Once the movie is over Jack is bouncing around the living room, showing the both of you that he could too be Spider-Man. He gets tired after about 10 minutes of just throwing himself around and pulls you off the couch to go play.

Soon you're sitting with your legs wide on the ground and Jack is nestled in between them, his back resting against you. The two of you are playing "civil war", with you fighting as Captain America and him fighting as Spiderman. Hotch has stepped out to answer the phone so you and Jack were left alone. Though you focus primarily on Jack, you can hear Hotch on the phone though you can't make out what he saying. After a while there's a knock at the door and he's leaned up against the frame with a frown on his face. A frown you knew too well.

"We have a case don't we?" You sigh, disappointed that your day with the Hotchner boys was cut short.

"I'm sorry, I know this was supposed to be a day for us."

You heart swells at his words; a day for us. He could've been exclusively talking to Jack but the way his eyes held yours, it felt like he meant the 3 of you.

"Its okay daddy, you have to save people from the bad guys." Jack sets down his action figure, looking up at you.

"Thanks buddy. Why don't you go get some stuff together for Aunt Jessica's."

"Next time we'll build a battlefield before we fight!" Jack yells as he pulls you into a tight hug.

"Of course we will sweet boy. I'll see you later." You hug him back fiercely, smoothing his hair. When you look up, Hotch is watching you with some unreadable expression on his face, similar to the one he had when he left your apartment the first time.

You release Jack and he runs off, towards his room. Hotch meanders his way to you and holds his hands out for you. You grasp both of them and he pulls you up, bringing your body flush to his. One of his hands stays on your hip, the other tilting your face up to look at him.

"I'm sorry." His voice is so soft, his eyes warm and tender. It makes your knees weak and you're grateful he's holding you.

"You have no reason to be. It's not like you're leaving, we both have to go."

"And yet, somehow I still feel guilty."

"Don't, there will be other days. If there's one thing you don't have to do with me, it's be guilty about the job. I get it, you know I do."

"I know, but I wanted today." He sticks out his lip slightly and it's become the cutest thing you've ever seen in your life within the moment.

"Are you pouting, sir?" You ask playfully, grinning up at him.

"Maybe."

"Lip in mister. I should get going, I have to grab my go bag from home."

"Alright." He murmurs begrudgingly, guiding you through the house to grab your bag before taking you to the front door.

"I'll see you in about an hour at work?" He opens the door for you and this time its you that steps out and turns around.

"Sure, I'll see you there, sir." You reach for his hand this time, squeezing it tightly in his signature fashion. He pulls you forward like he did the last time and you anticipate the warm embrace to follow.

"Y/n." He says and you look up at him, into those dark, smoldering eyes that analyze you.

"I mean Hot-" You start to correct yourself but suddenly, his lips are on yours. The kiss is so quick that you think you've imagined it. But you know that you haven't when he leans forward again, pressing one more peck to your lips. You're frozen in a daze, unsure if you've even reciprocated either of the kisses. The two of you hold eye contact for a few moments before you lean forward, taking initiative this time.  His mouth is eager and soft against yours, and you find your hands are in his hair before you can think about it. You keep this kiss tame, and pull back after a few seconds. He blinks as if he's in shock, his chest huffing as he tries to get his breath under control.  You watch him compose himself quickly, and its like the kiss never happened. He is prim and proper Aaron Hotchner again.

It worries you for a second how he can switch gears so fast but the thought comes as quickly as it goes, scrambled by the memory of his lips on yours.

"Drive safe." He says softly, squeezing your hand like he always does.

"Y-yes, um, sir, of, of course." You struggle to get your words out as you turn away from him, scurrying down the stairs to your car.

Tagged: @ssahotchsbitch, @ssahotchie, @mrsh0tchner, @azenpal, @disgruntledchowchow, @chelseyjoyce, @hotchwhore15, @hotforhotchner11, @ssamorganhotchner, @choppa-style, @kuolonsyoja, @heliotropehotch, @angelhotchner, @hellishvisions, @zetasaturno99, @g-l-pierce, @romanogersendgame, @leilanixx, @art-and-thoughts, @spngirl05, @infinite-tides