#some people really can't STAND that jada didn't break down and sit waiting by the phone in tears while they were separated

[torturedpoetemotions]

I means that’s love — to love despite the cheating — that is true love, even if greater on his side than hers. I’d kill (figuratively) for that.

I'm of two minds on this one. On the one hand, yes, loving someone means giving them grace and forgiveness when they mess up.

On the other hand, I would never continue a relationship with someone who actually cheated on me, i.e. slept with someone else when we had agreed to be exclusive. Even if I forgave them and still loved them, the relationship would be over. Why? Because relationships require trust and respect, and cheating is a clear indication on their part that they cannot be trusted and do not respect me.

I don't believe you can just go on autopilot and not realize what you're doing for the length of time it would take to initiate and complete any single physical act of cheating, much less an extended affair. People say they do, but I think what really happens is they want what they want in the moment than they want to be true to their partner or consider their feelings. Any claims of "I wasn't thinking straight" are just an excuse and an attempt to minimize what they did.

Emotional cheating I give more leeway for, because we don't always realize where our emotions are headed immediately. But I love myself too much to stay with someone who actively betrayed my trust to the extent required to physically cheat or carry on an extended affair. I would consider it extremely unhealthy, one-sided devotion to continue a relationship with such a person.

That being said, every single person who brings up Jada "cheating" on Will is full of it and lowkey implying she deserved to be mocked for her illness and appearance because of it. Which would be ableist bullshit even if she HAD actually cheated.

Both Will and Jada have said outright that they were separated when the relationship between Jada and August occured. It's also very clear based on both their statements that Will knew about the relationship, he wasn't being lied to. Nothing was happening behind his back. There was no betrayal of trust there. And unless and until they tell us otherwise, anything else is just gossip and speculation.

So Will's support of Jada isn't despite anything. It's because of the respect and trust they've built with each other in over two decades of marriage. I think this quote from one of Will's anniversary posts sums it up beautifully:

"Love is Like Gardening… I have learned to focus on HELPING you to BLOSSOM into what YOU want to be (into what you were born to be)… Rather than Demanding that you become what my Fragile Ego needs you to be.”

- Will Smith to his wife Jada Pinkett Smith on their 20th anniversary, December 31st, 2017 (source)