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#sometimes I wish there was like a guide or sth to dealing with intimacy when you're ace
loumauve
·
1 year
Text
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#sometimes I wish there was like a guide or sth to dealing with intimacy when you're ace
#not just in relationships but also in relationships
#bc sometimes I think back to conversations I've had with non-ace folks in the past
#and usually they would come down to sth like 'when you know you know'
#or 'there's gonna be this look and you'll know it's the right moment'
#which all seems fake af and untrue and entirely un-applicable if you've agreed to sth else
#like.. if you've agreed to not worry abt that and that you'll pick up the topic if anything ever changes
#but how do you know if things have changed. how do you know what you want vs what you're wanting only in the moment
#and how do you not make it awkward if you bring it up only to later realise maybe you were just having a weird moment
#(like. I go through phases every month and I know it's coming. but I also know it'll go away again eventually)
#(and like.. I guess I'm still terrified of setting expectations for things I can later not fulfill)
#(and sure that's prob due to fucked up shit that happened in past relationships and this is not the same)
#((..the difference a partner you can trust to keep their word on respecting your boundaries can make...))
#anyway. scared shitless of starting sth I can't finish. also unsure if I want to start anything in the first place
#and just so tired of not knowing where to even fucking start. gonna blame my migraine weirdness for posting this in the first place
#a day in the life of..
#(((how to know if maybe you'd like something now when you haven't in the past but now all parameters are different..
#..and maybe it would be nice but maybe it would still suck and you'd end up hating it and feeling regretful..
#..and maybe you'll never be able to get out of your head enough to just have a moment and go with it and be happy)))
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