#there's a reason the first scene we get with the birthday mug is with mike and el in s1 and the second scene is with mike and will in s2...

[hargrove-mayfields]

Autistic max? I’m all in -🦖

yes!! Max being on the spectrum is one of my favorite headcanons! Here’s a bit of my thoughts and hcs for you anon! <3

okay so first i wanna talk a little about where this hc came from! this idea was born in my head for a multitude of reasons, but the general summary is this:

-she misses a lot of social+emotional cues! she didn’t pick up on just how annoyed Mike was with her in the gym and kept pushing until El intervened, she didn’t detect any of Lucas’ panic or frustration when he was explaining the upside down to her until he touches her, and when el is jealous and just not interested in meeting her, she seems to be completely unfazed by that until she walks away. also every scene she has with Billy, he’s very shut off and she seems to be confused about what she’s expected to say, missing that he’s angry until he’s lashing out, and idk to me it just seems like she doesn’t really have a grasp on understanding others’ emotions!

-similarly, she only seems to react in the face of immediate danger, as if she’s a lot of the time unaware of how bad things truly are around her. like when she’s helping to find dart without even knowing what’s going on, driving a whole muscle car and going down into the tunnels without a hint of fear, seeming barely concerned when the mindflayer was about to drop through the ceiling. it’s almost like she has trouble fully processing the consequences of certain things, which could also explain why she sneaks out even though she probably knows what Neil is like and the fact that it could potentially put her in danger.

-the way she dresses just screams tactile sensitivity! she doesn’t ever wear anything flowy, any scratchy materials, and even at the snowball, where we see Susan fussing over her, she’s still dressed for comfort. what young girl with a mother clearly interested in making her pretty is going to get away with wearing jeans to a school dance if she doesn’t have sensory issues?

-also, whenever she gets upset she seems to shut down. like she almost never talks to Billy after he yells at her unless it’s necessary, when her and Lucas are talking on top of the bus it definitely seems like she’s struggling to voice her feelings or put words to her emotions, when Billy’s in the sauna, after he’s activated she starts turning in on herself, and after his death she’s just sitting in his room. like maybe she doesn’t really understand her own emotions that well either.

I’m not really viewing any of this as like, solid evidence or anything btw, these are just some things I’ve noticed about her as an autistic girl her age and living in a very similar situation that I think are neat and relatable!

onto the stuff I literally made up because I love her!

-Susan gives me autism mommy vibes. Like, making it her identity that she has a child with autism, and at times that can get super frustrating for Max because she hates being her mom’s little trophy daughter, gossiped about at all the potlucks so people feel sorry for her. Her absolute least favorite thing is “She’s such a handful.” and when Susan pulls the I’m so lonely because of taking care of you card to make her feel bad. Especially because she doesn’t feel very taken care of, once she’d hit a certain age her mother decided she’d be alright without all that “kid stuff” and basically tossed her into the world on her on. (hence why she’s Billys responsibility)

-In the 80s (and still now if we’re being entirely honest) it was very normal to just throw a casual r slur into conversation and it kills Max every time her friends say it, especially Mike because she thinks he’s being mean and doesn’t like her. She doesn’t know how to explain to them that that hurts her feelings because she doesn’t even know how to bring it up that she’s autistic. Billy tells her once to try to cheer her up that he could beat them up for her but she cries even harder because that’s what she doesn’t want, is for them to think she’s overreacting. He feels bad and tries to make up for it bringing it up with some of the moms of the group and asking that they tell their kids to stop using that word ever.

-In California she was in special ed classes, but Hawkins Middle deems that not necessary for someone of her “functioning level” (yuck) and she gets landed in coed instead. It might’ve been alright if that was how she started her education, but she was already used to classes of four or five kids like her, and she just cannot learn in that new environment. So she does really, really bad in school her first year in Hawkins. She feels kind of self conscious around her friends because they’re all so smart and her grades make her feel stupid even though it’s not her fault, and that’s why she kinda drifts towards being close with El because she struggles with learning things too.

-Smells are probably her worst overstimulation triggers. Things like cigarette smoke, fresh brewed coffee, her moms perfume, cooking and baking smells, the automatic air freshener thing, candles. Pretty much anything stronger than the smell of water is just overwhelming for her, especially if there’s something else already working her up, because then a whiff of something too strong can put her straight into a meltdown. Billy decides to quit smoking for her (he’ll never admit that, he’s adamant that it was because it was messing with his lung capacity and he’s trying to work out) and he also does things like buy Susan a new, less offensive perfume for her birthday and open windows to get stuffy air out of the house. They never really talk about what that does for her but like, that’s part of how they start getting closer, is when he starts making little accommodations for her like that.

-In addition to smells, there are very specific sounds she can’t stand. It’s not all loud noises, some of them like the rev of Billy’s car or a bass guitar at an outdoor amphitheater are some of her favorites, but the ones she doesn’t like, she really hates. Things like styrofoam, dishes hitting off of each other, something scratching against ice that builds up in the freezer, TV static, the toaster popping up or the oven beeping, and people who can’t chew with their mouths closed (looking at you Billy, keep that gum in your mouth please) all make her feel gross. She’ll try to physically shake off the way those sounds make her feel but sometimes they’re just too much and she shuts down for a while until she gets to hear something else. In that case usually really quiet music or someone talking to her quietly can reel her back in.

-Her interests vary a lot! The longest she’s ever held one special interest was a Miss Piggy phase! Susan liked that she was showing interest in a feminine character because of a lot of her si’s were tomboyish, but Max liked Piggy because she knew karate and punched people who laughed at her or tried to make her feel bad about herself! She has all sorts of Piggy collectibles, like toys, bed sheets, posters, books, mugs and watches! Otherwise her interests and fixations tend to come and go pretty quickly, like one week she could want to know everything there is to know about pro skaters, and the next she’s into the history of circuses! She liked cars for a little while and Billy was really excited to indulge in that and let her get familiar with the camaro, but she shifted to video games pretty soon after and he had to let it drop.

-Another interest that’s also pretty constant for her is nature! Not only for the sensory experience of it, listening to leaves rustle and birds chirp and water rush, but also all the knowledge about it. She can identify any type of flower, grass, tree, critter, or fungus! When she’s melting down and needs to be away from the house, she asks Billy to take her to the state park so she can just sit and be quiet and calm down on a fallen tree or a swing set somewhere. They do have some woods behind their house but she’s too afraid to venture out there and prefers to be out with her brother anyways.

-Stims! She’ll fiddle with zippers and buttons and loose threads constantly to the point that they buy her three or four of the same jackets and shirts for when she inevitably breaks them. She also chews on sleeves and hoodie strings a lot. Other tactile stims she favors are string tricks and braiding and tieing knots! Braiding her and Billy’s hair is something she’ll do anytime she needs to feel grounded, and she has a whole bunch of those little wooden boards that kids use to learn how to tie their shoes to tie knots with. She also always has a pocketful of yarn, and her favorite thing to make with them is a spider web or a star!

-Sort of related to her fascination with string is that her shoelaces never ever match, she has like a whole drawer in her room full of different ones to change them out! (and she has Miss Piggy Bow Biters to put on them!)

-She’s also a very verbal stimmer at times! Giggles for days with Max, if she’s excited, happy, nervous, whatever, she’s giggling. Humming and mimicking too, like if she hears a sound she likes she’ll try to make it, whether it be part of a song or something she hears outside. But if she is sad she’ll get as quiet as a mouse.

Idk these are just like my sort of canon compliant hcs I guess? Like what I feel would be true for her in the timeline and storyline of the show!

[littledaydreamsofyou]

What Better Reason?

To put things into perspective you had lived with a member of the Styles family for six months, had met her brother Harry numerous times, actually had his number in your phone from when he had arranged a surprise birthday bash for his sister, been around the whole Styles clan on the odd occasion and yet you still could never not get butterflies upon the first sight of the younger, yet taller Styles sibling.  And right now, as you were looking through the peephole at the handsome young man scratching the back of his neck, the butterflies were there as was the increased heart rate and the highly possible flushed cheeks.

With one deep breath you opened the door a little more force than usual, clearly your nerves gave you added strength.

“Hey! Harry, what are you doing here?”

“Good Evening” he kissed your cheek on his way past you to enter your shared flat, “thought I would swing by and see you seen as though I didn’t get to see you in Manchester”

You had been at Harry’s hometown concert a couple of nights previous with a friend from back home.  You’d had the tickets for months, even before you’d moved to London and had met Harry by way of his sister.

“Well thats a bit of a fib cause you definitely did see me”

“Should’ve come to the Arena earlier you know, my own bloody mother got to spend more time with you than I did by all accounts” Harry challenged you as he folded his arms, leaning back on the kitchen counter.

The whole concert had gone by in a bit of a blur if you were honest, you’re friend back home knew of your acquaintance in Harry but was hit full force with it on Monday night.  As you arrived you’d made your way to the box where close family friends were with Anne for the show.  She’d made you promise to stop by and a have quick glass of Prosecco before the show and as ever she was the hostess with the mostess, having some nibbles for you also and a goody bag with t-shirt and programme for the show inside for both of you.  

It was when you got to your seats that things out of the ordinary started happening as you’d barely warmed your seat up ahead of the support act before a man you vaguely recognised approached you very inconspicuously whispering in your ear for you and your pal to see Harry before the show.  Quickly you weighed the pros and cons for going with him but ultimately decided that you didn’t want to hurt Harry’s feelings by not going.

“Here she is”  you couldn’t help but smile at Harry’s beaming expression as he placed his mug down and made his way over to greet you with a hug.

“Hi H, this is my friend Rachel from home”

Your two friends exchanged pleasantries as you took in the backstage scenes but ultimately focusing on Harry’s outfit for the show tonight.

“Is it pink or red?” you asked running you hand down the material covering his arm.

“Not too sure to be honest, but does it suit me?”, “As fetching as ever Harry” you giggled as he did a flamboyant twill straightening up with his best Zoolander.

Truth be told he could make your knees weak wearing a bin bag and when it was announced that the support act was taking to stage in 10 minutes, you excused yourself not wanting to miss any part of the show.  Harry had asked you to stay and then had further offered VIP passes for you to go side stage whenever you wanted during the show, bot of which you turned down wanting to experience everything with Rachel in the thick of the crowd.

A girl with a polaroid camera was wondering backstage and had snapped a picture of the three of you as you wished Harry good luck, with Harry requesting one with yourself throwing his arm around your shoulders.

Getting back to your seats with no fuss, the concert had started and it wasn’t until part way during his set that you saw Harry close up again.  He stopped to say a hello and asked if you were enjoying yourself on the way to the B-Stage, much to the delight of the girls around you who got the opportunity to touch their idol and take photos of his lovely face…

“You’re still coming on Thursday, right?” Harry asked pulling yourself out of your memory

“Uh, yeah I believe so your mum and Gem have been messaging me about it”, a group chat had started a couple of weeks ago and arrangements had all been made.  “Sure you don’t want to come tomorrow night too?”

“I can’t, think I’ll be at work late and I just don’t want to be rushing around”, “You could always come for the last part?”

Harry had never asked you to be at his shows in the past and though you had gotten closer since spending time with all the family during Christmas and New Year, it still felt a little strange for him to  be requesting your presence.

“Harry, I really don’t think….”, “Here I’ll leave these for you and if you can make it that would be great”

He placed an envelope on the kitchen counter and wished you goodnight with a hug that left his scent on your t-shirt.

Looking through the contents after the door had closed behind him you pulled out tickets to the show, VIP Family pass and the polaroid from Manchester with the words until next time written on the white boarder.

“Well, bumping into International Popstar Heartthrob Sensation Harry Styles is a sure cure for having a shit day at work”

“Hey Han, want a cuppa?” your fairly new roommate dropped her bag to the floor and was in the process of taking her coat off.

You’d been flat sharing with Hannah since January after Gemma moved in with Mike and she was definitely more used to seeing Harry than you were despite only ever seeing him a handful of times.

“That would be great, I picked up some custard tarts if you fancy one”

“So I haven’t seen you since you got back home, tell me all about it”, you both got settled onto the sofa as you recalled tales of your trip to Manchester.

Wednesday the 11th April turned into the longest day in living history for you as you caught up with work that you had missed after having an extra two days off at the beginning of the week and it didn’t help that every half hour you had an internal battle with yourself to just call it a day and get your arse to the O2 with Hannah for a fun night.

Finally the little voice of temptation in your head quietened down and it wasn’t until you were on your way home scrolling through your Twitter feed that you saw what you had missed out on.

Congrats on your first night at the O2, was that you or Prince Charming dressed as a Matador on stage?  

It wasn’t until your mid-morning coffee break that you got a response from Harry, a simple purple suit dancing man emoji and when you text hime back he called.

“Well hello there” you answered taking a sip from your vanilla latte, “Good morning, missed you last night”

“You missed me? Don’t be silly H”

“Not being silly, just being honest is all” you don’t know what killed you more, the words he was saying or his voice still gravely and laced with sleep.

“Well it won’t be long, think we’re getting to the O2 for about four.  I’m finishing work early at getting to Gemma’s about three”, “Yeah mum’s here she said that she can pick you up if you want?”

You agreed to let Anne pick you up from work a little after lunchtime to take you over to Gemma’s where you were all freshening up before the concert.

“So what have you done to not let my son stop talking about you?”

“Sorry…. ?”  Anne’s question hit you off guard as you looked out of the car window at the London scenery.

“Well since I got here yesterday all Harry’s done is mention that you wouldn’t be there last night, how much he was looking forward to seeing you tonight, he seems rather interested in your whereabouts”

“I’m not too sure why, I haven’t seen him in ages since he’s been busy playing to thousands on a nightly basis”

“I think that’s the point love” Anne turned to look at me briefly with a knowing face that only a mother could possess. “He seems to be getting over everything that happened with Camille”

“What happened with Camille?” as far as I was aware it was a long distance casual thing according to Gemma who had divulged the minor details of her brothers dating life to me one drunken evening between Christmas and New Year.

“Not for you to worry about darling, just have a good night tonight with him”, “With everyone” I corrected.  “If you say so sweetheart”.

The two Styles women and I arrived at the O2 right on schedule and Harry was there to greet us as we entered the back corridor.  I watched as he said hello to his mother and sister, he was in all black his own merchandise on his top half and white socks covering his feet, and realised in that moment he was gorgeous both in looks but also how he treated those he cared about.

He took a step towards me as I took a deep breath to prepare myself, for what I am not sure, but when he put his arms around me in a warm cuddle and told me how nice it was to see me in my ear my whole body relaxed and was on edge at the same time.

I caught Anne watching our interaction whilst Gemma was nowhere to be seen and as soon as the moment had started it was over and I couldn’t help but want more.

Throughout the afternoon as we were included in Harry’s and the bands preparations I found myself drifting away in my own little world, allowing myself to think of Harry in a way that I seldom allowed myself to in the past. Found myself watching intently on how he moved, how his lips moved when he spoke and his facial expressions and the vein that appeared in his neck when he sang during soundcheck. Harry definitely was a specimen of human nature and I am sure millions of others would agree that his handsomeness was undeniable, but it was even more so now for me.

With me being wrapped up in my thoughts for the majority of the time, I had kept a little distance from Harry and it had actually began to worry me how quickly I had suddenly been hit the realisation that I actually liked Harry.  I mean I had always liked him, I had been a fan before I knew him and had liked the idea of him from afar, but now that I knew him personally it felt different and I wasn’t too sure what to do about it.

Harry had taken himself off to his dressing room a little after six with the tour stylist I presumed, to get himself ready for the show and just by coincidence when I was on my way back from the toilet his door was open again and he called my name.

“You look like Tarzan”

“Be my Jane?”, did I hear him right, “What?”

“Oh come on, you heard me” the cheeky lopsided smile made an appearance on his face

“Bloody hell Harry did you have to hunt that before you wore it?” Gemma came through to his dressing room with a beer in each hand, passing one to me whilst taking the piss out of her brother.

“You’re not the only one in this family that can wear leopard print sister”, “Clearly not baby brother can I touch it?”, “Definitely not”.

Mabel had been called to stage for her opening performance and Harry’s dressing room was buzzing, the band were all in high spirits and there were several guests backstage all of whom were enjoying themselves and patiently waiting, hoping, for a chance to have a small moment with Harry and a picture to remember it by.

As I stood with Anne, I could see how immensely proud of hm she was and I couldn’t help but let my thoughts drift again.  Had he always looked this good?  I decided that he definitely always had but because of my previous relationships, along with Harrys, and not actually knowing him all that well his potential had been overlooked somehow.

“He looks so happy” I observed aloud, “Yeah like the cat that got the cream.  Are you ladies ready to go take our seats?” Gemma stood in front of us blocking our view of the man of the hour parading around in his leopard suit.

Even though I had seen the exact same show three night ago, it was like I was seeing it again for the first time.  He sounded so good and his performance was flawless and it was made even more special that I got to experience this with his mum and sister, but that in itself was a whole different experience.  They had both been asked for a couple of pictures here and there and other concert goers were looking in their direction to take note of their reactions to certain songs and things he said, but I couldn’t take my eyes off of Harry.

My eyes stayed glued to him until the end of the show and then it was all a blur as Harry, his immediate team including Jeff and Glenne, his family and I scrambled to awaiting cars to take all of us back to Harry’s London home.

As we all sat around in his kitchen living room area catching up over time spent apart, tales of Harry Styles: Live on Tour so far, and general life I noticed the time and sent for an Uber to take me home for the night.  I explained that I had work in the morning and that if everyone was still in London that maybe I could catch up with them at lunchtime or when I finished at the office.

Harry walked me out to the gates at the end of his driveway stopping to turn and hold my hand as we reached the side gate.

“These past couple of weeks have been a complete whirlwind and it’s been amazing, I just feel like it’s going to taste a bit sour remembering it if I don’t tell you how pretty you look right now and how I haven’t been able to stop thinking about how you make me feel since I saw you with me backstage on Monday”

“But Harry, you’ve never even …. I never realised…. I just…”

“No I know and I don’t think I realised until Manchester when I couldn’t think of anything other than you would be there and I haven’t felt like that in a long time,” “But…”, “and I know that the timing could be better but I’m going away for a while and I couldn’t leave without telling you that”

“Thank you…”, “You’re welcome.  Wow, that turned very typically British rather quick”

“I’m sorry, look I uh…. I’ve had an amazing day today and that’s been because of you and uh, you look really pretty too. Oh god…” I couldn’t look at him but even in the darkness of the night I am sure you could see my burning cheeks from the moon.

“Well, thank you.  What are you doing this weekend?” Harry asked squeezing my hand to bring my attention unwillingly to his face.

“Nothing I don’t think, why?”, “Come to Glasgow with me, we can talk more there” Harry offered and in that moment I realised that I would always struggle with not agreeing to do anything that he suggested.

“I haven’t been to Scotland in a while ….”

“What better reason do you have then?”, “You”.