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punkscowardschampions · 4 years

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Janis & Jimmy

Janis: [So, AM before community service vibe, hit me with it] Jimmy: [I think he made her breakfast but he didn't make her breakfast in a cute way he just like threw it at her lowkey and all his focus is on the kids and Twix so even if he brought it to her in his room which he probably would, he was just like straight in and straight out with nothing to say] Janis: [which she'd probably brush off as just that tbh 'cos not a dick and already knows he lowkey does everything for them, so she's not gonna be fully freaked out as of yet even if it's a bit awkward, they sometimes can be still at this point so it'd be like oh but not OH yet] Jimmy: [we all know he's not a chatty kathy and neither of you are looking forward to community service so yeah it's just like okay but then he's also not saying a word on this bus/train whatever they are using to get their ride] Janis: [and there's no not noticing that] Jimmy: [like he's probably got headphones on and he hasn't shared/ is drawing the whole time etc be more of an antisocial teen I dare you] Janis: [like she'd be trying to get him to chat for a bit but she's not gonna not take a hint so then it's awkward] Jimmy: [well done boy so mature of you] Janis: [save the row for after community service though 'cos cutting you the slack of maybe you're dreading it that hard/are that pissed off about it, as if she isn't too/this was fully your idea to get into trouble as well] Jimmy: [I love that you wanna give him the benefit of the doubt babe and obvs there is a bit of FML because he's got a full plate/doesn't wanna do this/is still in dublin when he was doing it so they could leave etc but we know what's really up] Janis: [to be fair, it's more like not dying to have this convo, like don't wanna seem like you're #tookeen even though expecting him to be normal ain't that but still] Jimmy: [can't be Grace about it in any way, don't blame you girl] Janis: [so obviously once this awkward however many hours is over, going your separate ways which brings us up to speed] Jimmy: [how hardcore he would've ignored her makes me die like how are you keeping that up for that long, you aren't that busy] Janis: [it'd be hilariously obvious if it weren't making her fuming instead, like] Jimmy: [thank god he's at least got his dad and siblings in his grill to distract him because we all know how badly you wanna break that resolve and just say something to her] Janis: [meanwhile nothing but time 'cos you ain't even trying to go home rn] Janis: If it's gonna be a problem for you, I'm sure I can get moved onto different hours or a different project altogether Jimmy: Do what you want Janis: It's community service, hardly comes into the equation Jimmy: you get what I mean Janis: Sure Janis: if it makes no odds to you then you don't need to make such a job out of ignoring me, like Jimmy: you don't need to flatter yourself that hard, mate Jimmy: bit busy weren't we Janis: Again, hardly Janis: it wasn't that taxing but yeah, you seemed well stuck in Jimmy: ain't such an athlete like you or nowt but gotta give it 🥇 Janis: If you like Janis: long as you show up, they record your hours either way Jimmy: sound like you've done this before Janis: I don't want to make my rap sheet any longer than it is, if that's what you're so concerned about Jimmy: yeah first priority that, keeping you on the straight and narrow 👮 Janis: Now you've got jokes Jimmy: Who's joking? Janis: That's my question Jimmy: I've CLEARLY got nowt else on, what with community service being such a piece of piss and you being a dream come true Jimmy: 'course you're gonna be top priority Janis: Don't be a dick to try and win an argument we ain't having Janis: obviously you don't wanna do it, neither do I Janis: but you signed up for it, I didn't force you so no point being moody with me over it Jimmy: 1. I am dick and I've never been nowt else Jimmy: 2. I could give less of a shit about community service, I told you that before Jimmy: 3. I signed up for getting in trouble, like you said, this is barely it Janis: I'm not disagreeing but you've always asserted you ain't thick so you've changed your stance on that one or you're being a stupid dick right now Janis: so your plan didn't work and your next one is to work really hard at said not trouble Janis: that makes sense, sure, tah for clearing it up Jimmy: You an' all so you should know what this about and what it ain't about Janis: That's code for let me ignore you in peace, thinly-veiled at best Janis: like I said, I'll move and then you can, if that's all you've got to worry about, you're welcome Jimmy: it's not code for owt it's a loud and clear, leave it out Jimmy: I didn't sign up for this Janis: For what? Jimmy: You're gonna try and fake this now, are you? Jimmy: like you don't get it Janis: I literally don't know what your problem is Janis: stop being a pussy and say it then I will Jimmy: Then just get out of my face Janis: I'm not in your face, fucking hell Jimmy: You're in my head and I don't want you there, alright? Janis: I didn't put myself there Jimmy: it's my fault then, whatever, nowt should've happened Janis: Alright Janis: then forget it did Janis: what, I'm gonna force you to do that now too, fuck off Jimmy: how the fuck is everything so easy for you? it's getting beyond a joke now, rich girl Janis: It ain't Janis: but what the fuck am I gonna do in response to that, ignore you back? Jimmy: Why not? It's obvs working so well for me over here Jimmy: that'll be why I need you to spell out what I should be doing as a next move Janis: I'm not going to tell you what to do on that one, that'd be fucked up Janis: you make up your own mind but you didn't ask me mine or give me a fucking chance to explain it either so yeah Janis: don't be assuming fuck all about my side of it Jimmy: I don't wanna hear your side Janis: Then yeah, you shouldn't have done it Jimmy: Tah for keeping up with what I said ages ago Janis: Whatever Jimmy: just fuck off out of it Janis: Fuck off telling me what to do Jimmy: or what? Jimmy: shit'll get worse than this? Janis: Your life is shit, yeah Janis: and I'm making it worse? Janis: Alright, if it were my fault then you'd be able to do something about it but it ain't so you're still fucked Jimmy: so comforting you Janis: you don't want comforting Jimmy: What do I want? Go on Janis: I don't know and I'm not offering an answer Jimmy: shut up then Janis: Why should I Janis: and why have you Jimmy: what kind of question is that for fuck's sake? Jimmy: I'm trying to sort my head out here and you're Jimmy: you're just Janis: Your head is fucked Janis: who's ain't Janis: I was just being your mate Jimmy: I can't forget about it Jimmy: or you Janis: You didn't look like you were having no trouble icing me out all day Jimmy: well I were Janis: Do you actually have to Jimmy: What else am I gonna do? Janis: Just be my mate, like before Janis: doesn't need to be complicated, like Jimmy: When were it simple? Janis: alright, so simple is an oversimplification Janis: I'm not fucking asking to be your top priority or dream or anything like that though, thanks Jimmy: And I'm not really saying that Jimmy: but being around you is like a ⏲ on a 💣 Janis: Well, why can't you Janis: why can't we Jimmy: How can we? Janis: seemed like you had the hang of it last night Jimmy: funny Janis: I don't think it needs to be serious Janis: mope about the state of the rest of your affairs all you want Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: we had a plan, this weren't part of it Jimmy: that's all I'm saying Janis: It don't need to be related to that either Janis: it ain't Jimmy: Alright Janis: we hooked up 'cos we wanted to, yeah Janis: so what Jimmy: I'm sorry for being a dickhead Janis: always have been Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: take my sorry Janis: I don't want it Janis: just Jimmy: so what do you want? Janis: Tell me what you want Janis: then if its the same and we need to change some rules then we can Janis: and if it ain't then at least I know and we can go back or not do it at all Jimmy: I asked you first Jimmy: and I showed you before that Janis: alright Janis: well I wanna do it again, obviously Janis: but not if you're gonna be a total twat, like Jimmy: I'm probably gonna be a massive twat Janis: You know what I mean Jimmy: Yeah Jimmy: I'll try and be a massive twat in a way you'll like, alright? Janis: My type, yeah, I remember the bit Janis: Be whoever you want, we don't have to know each other for this either Janis: no more than we do now Jimmy: mates, I remember an' all Janis: Right, so you don't have to blank me and be awkward, there's no point making this community service shit worse Janis: obviously the fake shit could confuse it but we know it's fake and anything that'd be weird to bullshit now we can cut out, change the rules, that's what I mean Jimmy: I won't make it weird again Janis: I get it Janis: 'cos I was still there in the AM, yeah Janis: we won't do that again Jimmy: I just Jimmy: it's been ages and I weren't expecting owt to happen, least of all with you Janis: Likewise Janis: weren't the worst thing to ever happen though, was it Jimmy: I wouldn't want it to happen again if it were, that kinda thing ain't a #kinkunlocked soz if you're 💔 Jimmy: I know Mr Lucas is well into that shit but he's one of a kind, like Janis: Lucky for you we're not here to compare and contrast Jimmy: gutted for you 'cause you'd actually be 🥇 stood next to my ex Janis: can't all be RE teachers with halitosis 😍 Janis: I'll hold back on the sympathy card for her for now Jimmy: she'd never read it, can't Janis: 😏 shut up Jimmy: you don't want me to Jimmy: had a right mard on about my silence Janis: if you hadn't had enough of me telling you what a dickhead you are, I could carry on Jimmy: can never get enough foreplay me Janis: clearly Jimmy: you coming round or where are we going? Janis: There's probably a rule about this I should know, yeah Jimmy: you said we're writing our own rules Jimmy: has Bill's 👻 got his hopes up for nowt? Janis: nah, sounds like more fun than making you wait 3-5 working days 'cos you've pissed me off Janis: which I'm pretty sure is the advice so Janis: where else can we go right now Jimmy: my dad's car can take us anywhere you wanna go Jimmy: or just be the place we're alone in Janis: Alright Janis: gonna say, you don't need to take me anywhere Jimmy: bit 💔 that we didn't have this chat earlier, I'd have taken you all over our new bestie's house Janis: Likewise Janis: there'll sadly be other bullshit parties where less sadly you can actually mess my hair up Jimmy: you reckon we can use our new status with 'em to demand 💀👑 has a party at hers right now? Janis: Worth a shot Janis: bet she LOVES being a wingwoman Janis: ask if we can borrow one of her guest beds Jimmy: only if we actually use hers Jimmy: she LOVES a lie Janis: worth the risk of her NEVER cleaning her sheets again tbh Jimmy: she'd never have the strength tbf Jimmy: and all her maids are probably running round decapitated so Janis: 🐍 can definitely eat 🐔s whole Jimmy: yeah but then the 🐔 ain't crossing any roads to get her a new lad to torture or owt else she might NEED Janis: Ohh so that's what that's about Janis: makes so much sense Jimmy: 😱😱 SHE SAID NO 😱😱😱 Janis: 😩😩😩 Janis: like, jealousy is a disease, babes Jimmy: Asia said yeah but I dunno if I wanna go to her house Jimmy: might never make my way out again Janis: NEVER having a threesome with you and Asia Janis: idc how accomodating she is Jimmy: spoilsport Jimmy: accept the invite to the group 🗨 I started at least Jimmy: we're having a bloody top time Janis: I guarantee I can think of plenty more fun games to play Janis: all part of the foreplay, yeah, gotcha Jimmy: you tell me where to pick you up from or is hide and seek the first game? Janis: [somewhere in town that's not near his enough that she would just walk] Jimmy: Alright, hang on Janis: Feeling well patient Jimmy: [a 🔥 sext] Jimmy: that'll help Janis: I hate you Janis: not like I've been thinking about it since you left Janis: or like I'm in public rn Jimmy: 🤔 that don't sound like you hate me enough Jimmy: [an even more 🔥 sext] Janis: Jimmy Janis: I hate you so much Jimmy: I'm alright with that Janis: Good Janis: 'cos I intend on showing you just how much when you get here Jimmy: 🤞 I only get done for speeding on the way back Janis: 👮 cockblocking is not a thing I wanna get used to in my daily Jimmy: be alright, they look after their own, weren't that what you said? Janis: Sure, your fake ID also your badge, like? Jimmy: you gonna let me have any secrets? Janis: Depends, of course Jimmy: go on Janis: How interesting it is Janis: keep your boring ones by all means Jimmy: they're all boring 💔 I know Janis: I'll survive Janis: no fear Jimmy: unless I 💀💀💀 you Janis: yeah right Janis: catch me holding my breath on that one 😏 Jimmy: might be hard to breathe normally in a bit, yeah Jimmy: I get that Janis: Shh Jimmy: no need, there's nobody to risk waking up this time Janis: 1. I wasn't even that loud Janis: 2. I don't think anyone even woke up anyway Janis: 3. was your fault so Jimmy: 1. too right you weren't, that's what I'm saying, can be as loud as you want now Jimmy: 2. I'll take the blame for last night and the credit for the 🔊 in a bit Janis: Don't reckon your dad's car is soundproof Janis: but yeah, we can find out Jimmy: weren't planning to leave it somewhere any dickhead can enjoy the show Janis: Good to know Janis: can't just ambush a person with dogging, v rude Jimmy: heads up for next time then Jimmy: can't enjoy myself without 👴 about Janis: Fair play Janis: Lucas was in your wardrobe so 🤷 Jimmy: 🤤🤤🤤 Jimmy: tah, the reminder'll get me through this Janis: So charming Janis: go back to telling me to fuck off, that was better tbh Jimmy: I've got hotter chat but if that's what you wanna hear Janis: Really Janis: where have all these words sprung from then Jimmy: feeling inspired Janis: 👻🖋💘 Jimmy: you're trying to give Bill my 🥇? bit rude Janis: I'm saying he'll be buzzing Janis: s'one old pervert who'll always be about Jimmy: well now I am an' all Jimmy: won't have to fake nowt for you, what a relief Janis: Funny 🙄 Jimmy: what's funnier is I might be lost Janis: You better be joking Jimmy: I'm just warning you, girl, I'm surrounded by houses, which don't look right for where you said you were Janis: What are you like Janis: no, I'm not getting you to pick me up from my previous, like Jimmy: 😎🚬 obvs Jimmy: hang on, I can do this Janis: Your navigational skillz ain't required for foreplay Jimmy: wouldn't be decent if I had none though Janis: 😂 Jimmy: Alright, I'm back where I fucked this up ⏲🤞 Janis: My faith is so real Janis: 🙏🙌😇 Jimmy: 😈 me Jimmy: got you something for the sorry you don't want Janis: I'm suspicious Jimmy: as long as my dad ain't Janis: You just stolen his car or? 🤔 hmm Jimmy: his car and the most #goals bottle from his stash Janis: 😍 Janis: that's for the bottle, obvs Jimmy: charming Janis: not faking shit, remember Jimmy: I'll have my 😭 when we've gone our separate ways and you're cracking on with the drink Janis: your loss if you ain't staying around to finish it with me Jimmy: would be a 💔 loss Janis: Be smart then Jimmy: don't sound like me that Jimmy: but alright, I'll have a go Janis: you have to stick around for a bit anyway Janis: give me chance to actually earn that 🥇 Jimmy: I've got nowt else on, been smart there, 'cause knowing you it'll take ages Janis: Piss off Janis: you don't know, that's the point Jimmy: calm down, mysterious lass not gonna unlock your secrets and your kinks Jimmy: have still got a job to go to, like Jimmy: can't be on a constant clock with you Janis: You coming to fuck or what Janis: don't put yourself down so much 💕 Jimmy: the point I were making were, if it's one of the other, we're both agreed on which one's getting 🔓 Jimmy: ain't trying to read your diary even if I were capable Janis: Duh Janis: Point I was making is you don't know how long it'll take me 'cos you didn't give me no chance Janis: no deeper than that, gotta relax, mate Jimmy: giving you the chance now, dickhead Janis: so grateful 🤤🤤😍 Jimmy: dunno how grateful this car will let you be but if anyone's a pro at 🙏🙌😇 against them 😈 odds it'll be you, Jules Jimmy: truly inspiring shit Janis: Bigger than confessional Janis: I got this Jimmy: time's come to prove it Jimmy: get in the car please Janis: As you asked nicely Janis: and I have wanted to do this all day Janis: [sup] Jimmy: [hands her the #goals because it's unopened bottle like good evening] Janis: [does the 'not bad' face like okay boy, I see you 'maybe finishing the whole thing and getting this car back in one piece is a bit ambitious then'] Jimmy: [gives her a look like challenge accepted and starts driving them to wherever they can get enough privacy so enjoy the VIBE in this car for a bit lads] Janis: [trying to think of a way to say 'I missed you' that isn't purely that 'cos not trying to freak him out again so sat there drinking and 🤔] Jimmy: [sneaking all the looks at her that he can while still safely driving because ofc] Janis: [same obvs 'cos not driving so can be more shameless so enjoy all that accidental eye contact 'today was so...boring'] Jimmy: ['tomorrow'll be owt but' another look like challenge accepted and 😏 though god knows what you think you're gonna get away with sir] Janis: [IRL 🤞 and a shrug 'it can be'] Jimmy: [reaches over and uncrosses her fingers and then writes 'will' as in it will be on her hand with his fingertip like I got this] Janis: [just casually way too affected by that simple touch 'cos it's been a whole day and you're high-key, holding his hand for a bit but like HARD not cutesy 'cos intense af rn and then letting it fall to rest in your lap like hey] Jimmy: [driving a bit faster so you can get there faster without even really being aware of it and obvs leaving that hand there] Janis: ['you're not gonna get lost this time, yeah' half question half observation] Jimmy: ['be your fault if I do, won't it?' because she's his human sat nav but also v distracting] Janis: ['can't be that bothered, lost is where we need to be right now'] Jimmy: [nods because where's the lie] Janis: [just giving him swigs from the bottle like your parents' spidey senses are going off so hard rn] Jimmy: [I'm internally screaming you bad eggs] Janis: [my boo say safety first] Jimmy: [he 100% doesn't have his seatbelt on either because of that rib injury #tut tut] Janis: [I'm loling you grandma ily] Jimmy: [I do hate seatbelts tbf they are so uncomfy] Janis: [tru tea, we out here risking it all in all the ways Jimmy: [to be a 15 year old rebhog] Janis: [not gonna kill you for it don't worry] Jimmy: [get there before the sexual frustration kills you though] Janis: [we're definitely stopping at the first place that is deemed suitable, regardless of the plan] Jimmy: [mhmm that is the whole plan, stop as soon as you can lol] Janis: [we all know there is zero chill with how fast you're gonna be on him] Jimmy: [she's on a #mission just like he was the night before] Janis: [out to prove this is the best idea ever like debatable but we know where it ends up so go off] Jimmy: [he's got no room to say shit cos fake dating was his idea and like what the fuck was that boy] Janis: [love a bad idea moment, y'all are blatant god bless] Jimmy: [case in point taking this car wasn't a good one] Janis: [100% could lose your license before you get one] Jimmy: [at least your dad won't dob you in cos doesn't want police at his door again so soon] Janis: [like you stay away from those ribs 'til they're healed sir] Jimmy: [and his face because she'd know and we ain't ready to have that convo] Janis: [they've not been arrested/ran from a crowd recently enough and he doesn't seem like the type to be out brawling even if she don't know his life so yeah] Jimmy: [behave yourself Ian thank you very much, verbal arseholery only rn] Janis: [but this moment is not at all about you so good day] Jimmy: [nothing is ever about you sir but especially this] Janis: [when this is purely about them and that's why it threw y'all, no one to hide behind here] Jimmy: [the headfuck of feeling something really intensely for someone you don't even know/are pretending you don't even like] Janis: [least we can fake that this is purely sexual even though it's already not, see how long you can last lads] Jimmy: [It's gonna be fun tbh] Janis: [if you were confused before lollol] Jimmy: [so many mixed messages all the time good lord] Janis: [we should have the flat whites invite them to something to be fake at] Jimmy: [yeah just for that really awkward shift they'll have to do from the REALEST to the fakest cos we're evil] Janis: [like it should be something they can't just sneak off from to fuck, not easily anyway lmao, use your basic brain to think of a thing it could be] Jimmy: [is there anything else we wanna do here before we send them off to the hellishness that'll be chilling at Mia's?] Janis: [we know the vibe here I think, and they can get the invite before going their separate ways even so makes it easier] Jimmy: [literally as soon as they're done like oh hi] Janis: [fun never stops, will need to take this car back and walk tho lads] Jimmy: [at least you'll have plenty of time to 🚬 cos dreading this] Janis: [to the point you were definitely like shall we even but you must, dedicated to this plan] Jimmy: [this can be point scoring with 💀#2 cos in Mia's own home as well, she'll be livid] Janis: [if Asia is being all extra with her man, can easily spend that quality time with her and the tall one] Jimmy: [oh Asia, you know her man is gonna be so OTT too and not in a goals way] Janis: [lowkey like get a room, not that you two can talk but that's in a party setting usually, not your weekly sleepover moment lol] Jimmy: [we all know they are gonna be adorable tonight cos gotta keep it #goals even if they'd rather get a room too lol] Janis: [at least you have some form of being a bit much but only so much you can get away with without being rude and you're tryna be friends now so unlucky, just 🚬 and talking over gameplans 'til you arrive] Jimmy: [when you're 😒 the whole walk but you gotta snap right into 😍💕] Janis: [when it's so confusing 'cos you do like each other but you're pretending you don't and then you have to be really OTT which is like a lil' too much, obvs, but some bits would be kinda nice like ???] Jimmy: [such a headfuck of a time, I love it] Janis: [we evil, so is Mia, hello] Jimmy: [it's just hit me that she'll have to wear his clothes for this sleepover moment because that's where they went he wasn't taking her all the way back to cali's to get shit and like I'm not fine] Janis: [right, she was wearing #2 dress, then they went back to his, so whatever she had on before the dress she would've had to put back on for community service so that'd be way too dirty by this point to wear tonight, make that a moment, bye] Jimmy: [RIP to me and Jimothy because you know she looks so good rn] Janis: [I'll see if I can find anything but it might all be a lil TOO basic but defs a thing like oversized top and boxers moment, when you out cute Asia and her mans when you walk through the door] Jimmy: [just effortlessly 🥇 you two] Janis: [we all been knew honey] Jimmy: [he should make them all personalised smoothies and get her to help him because way to score points because he's actually good at it but also they get to be alone for a hot sec because those rich bitches aren't gonna get involved like Grace and Tall Tammy would but Mia would 100% stop them by being all I need you to do such and such] Janis: [that's such a good idea, they'll be buzzing, even #2 if they made something uber clean and healthy] Jimmy: [yeah Janis' would probably the only one that'll actually taste nice because the flat whites will have gross healthy green ones or whatever but they'll be pleased put some fuckboy protein rich shit in Asia's bf's one] Janis: ['feel more normal?' 'cos so weird to be hanging with them for you both for different reasons] Jimmy: [looks down like he's in desperate need of that barista apron and does an OTT pout but we know he's surviving really] Janis: ['yeah, I'm gutted too' looking him up and down like not hot without it 😏] Jimmy: [throws something at her like a tea towel or banana peel not a plastic toy being wanged at her jaw full pelt sir] Janis: [lmao, batting whatever it is away like 'OMG, DON'T MESS AROUND HERE' 'cos her mum must do something with her days so I bet it's show-home levels] Jimmy: [Grace don't be spilling that smoothie you'll get murdered babe but you two have a little kitchen playfight when he throws something else at you cos that bitch and still in that flirty mood from earlier] Janis: [leave a mess on purpose 'cos not here to befriend you hun like whoops soz, we all know we're gonna need someone to come in and stop this going into a full thing so should be #2 for the throwback] Jimmy: [Mia sending her in cos she's a control freak and can't bear that they're in there living their best lives] Janis: [already mad at Asia on the low 'cos of her mans, the minions are not behaving rn lol] Jimmy: [she would not want him there AT ALL and you know Mia would be gutted she's not with Harry to bring him and make it awks] Janis: [like she does not want a boy seeing her in her PJs or doing a face mask or something 'cos she only hooks up so she'll be sitting there not joining in at all like 😒 probably with Grace if we're being real] Jimmy: [yeah cos Grace don't want anyone to see her doing anything ever unless she has perfect make up so] Janis: [got her on side at least] Jimmy: [meanwhile jj are just snuggled drinking their smoothies] Janis: [just imagined the kermit tea meme there for some reason] Jimmy: [Asia's bf probably downed his cos such a #lad] Janis: [#ladsladslads you know they don't drink at these things usually like why would they waste the cals but gotta 'cos he's here to seem so cool oh ladies] Jimmy: [Mia getting angrier by the second] Janis: [like how do I throw these boys out of my house without getting a rep as a total uncool bitch lmao] Jimmy: [*cough* lesbian] Janis: [we all know the invite was 1000% just for Janis and they've just ignored that lmao] Jimmy: [#tea I dread to think what cringe film they are probably watching rn] Janis: 😴💀🤢 Janis: please kill me Jimmy: [does something saucy like suck on her earlobe because okay I'll kill you but 'subtle' enough that the flatwhites can't be too mad but will still notice] Janis: [purposely takes some more blanket for them for the cliche of the flat whites thinking they're gonna be being saucy underneath but doesn't actually initiate anything 'cos was appreciative enough and it shows 😳] Jimmy: [gets even closer to her even though they were already close af for the cliche but also because he just wants to] Janis: [everyone pretend to focus on this cringe romcom quick] Jimmy: [giving her all the 😍 that are SO FAKE YEP and touching her so much not in a saucy way just in really soft ways like imma just lightly brush my fingertips over any skin that's exposed nbd] Janis: [we all know that kills you lowkey so much harder and you know he knows that so you're like 😒 but also in no way tryna stop him/leaning into him] Jimmy: [no boy that none of y'all flatwhites have been with would ever, like take a sec to just compare any of that to what Asia's bf would be doing #gross] Janis: [none of us wanna think about that, least of all Asia probs] Jimmy: [you missed your chance gal] Janis: [imagine, what a duo] Jimmy: [still would ship it harder than Ro and Drew though] Janis: [we can all be thankful we're not witnessing that rn, though he would be getting out of prison now-ish and she ain't dead yet either] Jimmy: [ew, I'm gonna just bring it back to JJ by saying he kisses her but in a really soft teasing way cos gotta kill her but again it looks chill and romantic compared to how extra Asia and her man are so points won with the rest of the squad] Janis: [when you are so mad but the 😍 are not fake either] Jimmy: [you both love this who are you kidding] Janis: [y'all do too much so now you're salty you've got to sit here and be vaguely sociable with these hoes lol] Jimmy: [casually counting down to when you can go have a smoke break without coming across as being rude] Janis: [way longer than you would like that's the tea, resting your head on his shoulder and absentmindedly pressing his sternum area, gently, checking how his healing is coming along without even thinking about it] Jimmy: [gotta play with her hair soz Grace look away] Janis: [just having emotions over there don't mind her, meanwhile, you have to show how BORED you are by laying in his lap instead, 'cos there's only so fake you can be without it being unbelievable] Jimmy: [they're all aware she's a bad bitch global] Janis: [like to think Tammy is just genuinely loving it lmao] Jimmy: [being such an attentive boyfriend by asking her if she needs anything to drink or eat or whatever quietly cos faking that you just genuinely wanna know and don't wanna disturb anyone else but we know they all 👂 and Asia is fuming on the low that her mans don't care at all] Janis: [breaking that bro-code and making him look bad, he will be so mad, oh no 😂 'causing drama with how #goals you are as standard, just snuggling into him harder in response like no, don't wanna move or have you leave thank you] Jimmy: [such a good snuggle moment ensuing, god bless] Janis: [fully imagine Mia switching this off like let's do something else 'cos she's so mad] Jimmy: [yaaaaas we must] Janis: [hmm, maybe some kind of sport moment like tennis is the cliche of course] Jimmy: [her dad would 100% have a tennis court or some bullshit lol] Janis: [such a posh girl flex, unless we're gonna commit and make her a horse girl but they will lose it lmao] Jimmy: [one of them definitely should be but maybe Asia or Tall girl because Mia would never give that much of a shit about anything lowkey like she has her eating disorder and her JJ obsession that's all folks] Janis: [that's true] Jimmy: [Mia has 10000% lost Grace if they gonna do tennis because she would not be about it, unlucky hun you can't win tonight] Janis: [I feel like it was her idea to show off to the lads 'cos she'd probably be good at it 'cos daddy's girl but like Jimothy is not interested and I doubt Asia's man is unless you're putting the whole outfit on babe] Jimmy: [I love how hard this has backfired] Janis: [she should nab Jimmy to play doubles but you don't know that JJ love competition so ha, make Janis play with Asia's boyf and hope he doesn't totally suck] Jimmy: [tbf Jimmy wouldn't have ever played before unless they do in PE some time or something cos not a posh boy so Mia would be thrilled to have him on her team while he gets the hang of that] Janis: [awkward moment when this is her gay fantasy and the lads are just there lmao] Jimmy: [at least he can make a thing of getting Janis to 'teach' him and shamelessly flirting because she'd be even more annoyed than she was before then] Janis: [when they won't do exactly what you want, oh Mia] Jimmy: [gotta order all the takeout at the insistence of Asia's bf so she actually has a breakdown] Janis: [so much food, Chinese fosho] Jimmy: [this is why Asia likes you boy] Janis: [bahahaha the 😍] Jimmy: [highkey the only reason she brought you along] Janis: [and to get fingered in front of her pals, obvs, cheers boy] Jimmy: [what a horrific visual so i'll imagine instead how much blatant shade JJ are whispering to each other to the point that Mia would defs know but she can't prove anything cos they could just be being saucy] Janis: [hohaha when you're literally gonna give her a breakdown tonight] Jimmy: [ultimate goals] Janis: [whispers 'tell me this ain't good foreplay' for the bants] Jimmy: [😏 because can't piss himself loling and then kisses her 1. so he doesn't 😂 and 2. in answer to what good foreplay it is #bants] Janis: ['think he's ready now' loudly @ Mia like teaching is over and so 😏 @ him] Jimmy: [I think it should be a draw because that'd annoy her thinking she'd win easily] Janis: [a mood, deffo, like you know Janis is sporty even if she ain't a tennis bitch, sort it out] Jimmy: [when you'd wanna play again to try and beat her but nobody is arsed like Jimothy is 100% gonna use the excuse of them being outside to pull Janis away to 🚬 and get a break from Mia] Janis: [can say they'll wait out front for their food also like further distance so they can actually chat without any chance of them being extra and nosy with it] Jimmy: [well played lads] Janis: [I also think they shoulda done really OTT grunts when they were playing 'cos amusing me so it would them, even if we inadvertently turn Mia on lmao] Jimmy: [bahaha] Janis: [#worthit] Jimmy: [gotta have whatever fun you can cos this would so crap] Janis: ['you reckon this is just her way of saying she's reconsidered on the spare room, like?'] Jimmy: [doing that lol you couldn't before] Janis: [we know when he lols it makes her 😍] Jimmy: [gotta have some back because she's so beautiful bye] Janis: [when you gotta make out hard to cover any feeling that ain't strictly sexual 'it's so good to actually do this properly without any of the bullshit for them'] Jimmy: [going as hard for the same reason but then after she's said that also going harder because you want her to feel even better than good cos 🥇 and you genuinely think she means it] Janis: [just being all kinds of hot with your 🚬s sharing smoke between making out 'promise you're gonna make this feel worth it by the end of the night?'] Jimmy: [going in even harder than you already were like I'll make it feel worth it NOW honey] Janis: ['fuck, Jimmy!' when you're already so frustrated and you've not been here that long 'we don't have to go back in, yeah' when you definitely do and you're not saying let's do one but you wanna pretend that much right now] Jimmy: [just dying because 1. you're as frustrated as her 2. you know she is and 3. she said your name so when you try and give her an answer it's just SUCH a noise but that's the best indication that you're on the same page rn that you could've given anyway so] Janis: [the biggest and realest 😍 'cos 'that was so fucking hot' and you can't not let him know in all the other ways beyond telling him] Jimmy: ['you' because she is the hottest and we all know it] Janis: ['for you' and the MOST eye contact honey] Jimmy: [just being as extra as Asia and her bf now soz not soz 🤞 that food doesn't show up for a bit lol] Janis: [soz delivery dude you're getting a show] Jimmy: [not that soz though because wouldn't even notice you atm] Janis: [literally gonna have to make a right song and dance of your approach like 'scuse me lads] Jimmy: [I just imagined the delivery man literally doing a musical number cos I'm a nerd] Janis: [lmao, also you're gonna have to go back whilst this is hot or Asia and her man will be raging] Jimmy: [can't let all your hard work being fake nice go to waste] Janis: [the saddest of times] Jimmy: [if they weren't having much fun before they'll have even less now we're forcing them to go back in] Janis: [Mia you better not start rn she'll be spitting blood from biting her tongue, like] Jimmy: [we should have her dad come back when they're all eating so Mia really wants to die] Janis: [Oh lordy, deffo, helping himself to the food too 'cos a rude dickhead] Jimmy: [oh god of course he would] Janis: [I bet he's lowkey creepy with her friends, not like he'd do anything but it's just awks] Jimmy: [just an uncomfortable vibe at all times] Janis: [everyone enjoy this, Mia try not to have a stroke] Jimmy: [at least JJ can be cheered by how much Mia is clearly hating life rn] Janis: [just being like 'your dad seems cool' 😏] Jimmy: [Asia chatting away to her dad oblivious god bless that dumb bitch] Janis: 💔 for you boys Janis: so blatantly wants a Daddy™ Jimmy: ain't even hungry now 💔😭🎻 Janis: [taking some of his food like if you're sure] Janis: now you're really devastated Jimmy: You're a dickhead Janis: Calm down, chubbs Janis: [offering her plate like swapsies] Jimmy: [fake 😍 as he takes it but obvs gotta be cute and feed her even when you're 😒] Janis: adorable Janis: ➕✔ Jimmy: try not to 🤢 like Jimmy: [Mia's dad 👀 taking her off to have a weird™ convo about boys] Janis: won't waste the food Janis: hit #2 with the fatherly advice whilst Mr Daddy is busy Jimmy: [does chat to her cos that bitch] Jimmy: ✔ Janis: Rude Jimmy: ? Janis: I want some 😏 Janis: feeling left out Janis: clearly the most in need, no other bitch here is in community service Jimmy: come here then Jimmy: [cos obvs gotta sit on his knee you're not 🎅 boyy] Janis: [does though, looking at him with big eyes like he's about to drop some real wisdom on her] Jimmy: [does whisper some stuff to her that he knows she wants to hear though] Janis: [a lil noise like 'scuse her] Jimmy: ['now that was rude' so only she can hear it and know that you're dying thanks very much] Janis: ['kinda your fault' whispered back 'cos well] Jimmy: [😏 unrepentant actually] Janis: [likewise that you ain't moving now you're here not soz everyone] Jimmy: [he loves it so you can deal ladies] Janis: [definitely not helping with the frustration but we know that's why you're doing it lads #shameless] Jimmy: [we 👀 you and so does Mia as she comes back from that fun chat] Janis: [if looks could kill] Jimmy: 👀🔪🔪 Janis: Well greedy, her Janis: had your turn already Jimmy: you better 💀💀💀 me quick, mate Jimmy: she reckons she can beat you to it Janis: 🎾 you to death Jimmy: hot Janis: that's definitely a shit horror movie Janis: give you all yankee accents and football and cheer uniforms and we're good to go Jimmy: rich girl rampage Jimmy: 🍅🍅 out of 🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅 Janis: not alright with that score Jimmy: 🍅 or 🍅🍅🍅? Janis: Soz, just not used to not being 🥇 Janis: so strange Jimmy: I'll 🖋 you a decent film baby Janis: 🤤😍 Janis: Babe! Jimmy: 💕 Janis: can't wait to tell everyone you're gonna make me famous, OMG Jimmy: basically have done with my 📷 Janis: been a while, bighead Jimmy: can you wait a bit longer or what? Jimmy: [such a LOOK because we all know what he means] Janis: What if I can't? Janis: [a LOOK back] Jimmy: [literally can see how hard he's trying to think of a way to sneak off even for a second like] Janis: ['you're so cute' 'cos can just say that and no one's batting an eyelid] Jimmy: [when you're like oh that's so weird because I don't feel good at all rn big song and dance to try and leave this table with her immediately] Jimmy: [💀#2 backing up your fake story inadvertently like #same cos wanna be 🤢 thanks gal] Janis: [real mvp right there, so OTT like feeling his forehead and getting a glass of water for him before making Mia direct you to a bathroom] Jimmy: [I'm loling, what a shit evening you're hosting babe] Janis: [also lol how bad y'all are at this like we didn't know] Jimmy: [JJ doing the most to salvage their night] Janis: [and just doing the most] Jimmy: [#tea] Jimmy: [make sure you lock the bathroom door this time kids, don't need Mia coming to 'check he's alright'] Janis: [learn from your mistakes, when you know you don't wanna be interrupted this time 'cos not for show] Jimmy: [I do vote you get back in the bath though for the mems and because there'd actually be room for both of you to lie down unlike the state of Ian's car earlier just put some fancy towels in there so it's not freezing on any bare skin] Janis: [so considerate] Jimmy: [I is and he is] Janis: [just don't accidentally turn it on when you're getting carried away here] Jimmy: [cos god forbid rich people turn a tap you'd probably only have to push a button or something boujee] Janis: [exactly, and as amusing as it'd be, you're already down to wearing his clothes rn and you don't wanna borrow Mia's instead tah] Jimmy: [they would not see the funny side rn, levels of frustration are too sky high] Janis: [#tea] Jimmy: [not gonna be that mean lads you've already struggled enough by having to be here doing all this flat white bollocks] Janis: [Asia's boyf is deffo gonna say something gross to Jimmy and Asia should overhear at least and they go off to have an argument for the lols and awkwardness factor for all] Jimmy: [100% here for that because how real] Janis: Shit stirrer Janis: 😏 Jimmy: he must've heard I've only got the one good 👂 Janis: 🤞 that's all he heard and his own 👂s ain't as big as his gob, like Jimmy: 😏 Janis: How many boyfriends can we make her get through Janis: the real question Jimmy: Depends Janis: on Jimmy: first off if 💀👑 properly snaps tonight 🔪🔪 Janis: I would give that a strong 90% likelihood but tennis probably took it right out of here, no way she's gonna be up for a spree now 30% at best Jimmy: don't have to hold the 🔪 herself that's what her minions are for Janis: yeah, and look at the state of 'em Janis: #2 got no strength ever, my sister is squeamish as hell and wouldn't risk her manicure for it Janis: lurch might be up to it, if she's not too busy recording herself 'dancing' Jimmy: Alright, won't put my hard earned 💰 on owt Janis: so, what's your 2nd point Jimmy: Depends how long we're stuck in the BFF zone an' all Janis: 'course Janis: could continue to fuck up her 💕life after but that's only something a real good friend would do so Jimmy: duh Janis: have to be quick Janis: don't know how much of this I can hack Jimmy: we could just go on account of me 💀💀🤢🍜 Janis: sexy Janis: we could Janis: but it'd mean more hangouts more times, if we get this done, we've made loads of progress Jimmy: 🥇💡 mate Janis: 🔥 thank you Jimmy: 💣 Janis: 😏 Jimmy: speaking of, if I smack that lad after they've spent ages rowing I'll get a 🏆 instead of losing points, yeah? Janis: who from? Jimmy: who else but my true love? Janis: that's 50/50 Jimmy: ugh, but I wanna smack that dickhead Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: Poor you Janis: 💔 Janis: could be making up as we speak Jimmy: Oi, I don't wanna start actually feeling 🤢 tah Janis: he could be the love of her life Janis: gutted Jimmy: shut up Janis: 🖋 a play about it Jimmy: will do Janis: sure it'll be a masterpiece, mate Jimmy: obvs Jimmy: all the 🦎 and 🐸 lads, like a more grim wind in the willows Janis: 'course you'd write a play with no girls in Janis: proper 👻🖋 move Jimmy: unless you wanna be in it Jimmy: only got the one muse, don't I? Janis: yeah Janis: not my fault your true love ain't very inspiring, like Jimmy: is a bit your fault Janis: you want me to give her lessons on top of being her bezzie mate Janis: that's a bit much Jimmy: if you ain't up for the challenge Janis: I am Janis: she ain't Jimmy: bad worker blames their tools, girl Janis: 🙄 Janis: can only be one or the other Janis: your type or your muse Jimmy: could be the artist himself Jimmy: might just be a bit shit Janis: depends what we're rating you on Jimmy: the finished 🎨 what else? Janis: the ❤s don't lie Jimmy: but they ain't worth as much if you're getting 'em for stuff like holding the brush the right way up Janis: can't get you an audience with taste Janis: if I knew where they were, wouldn't be here, would I Jimmy: I'll live Jimmy: as muses go, you're alright Janis: Oh, tah Jimmy: 👍 Janis: was gonna compliment you but if that's the level, I'll save it Jimmy: if I want one, I know how to get 'em Janis: I'm sure Janis: not from me though Janis: 😶 Jimmy: [does his best to try and get one from her, excuse him everyone] Janis: [shamlessly enjoying that] Jimmy: [you better give him one gal cos he's not gonna stop until you do #shameless] Janis: you are such a dickhead Jimmy: top at giving out compliments, you Jimmy: 💕 Janis: afraid you'll never know Jimmy: [gives her a look like challenge accepted and shamelessly back at it again at krispy kreme because we're all bored of the flat whites and no other reason oh no] Janis: [the levels of the lady doth protest too much, excuse them everyone, assumedly you're all entertaining yourselves right now/pretending not to watch] Jimmy: [tik toking like your life depends on it or something lol] Janis: ['alright, alright' out loud but not actually gonna compliment you 'cos then it wouldn't be real and we all know it] Janis: I was going to say you're better than you fake Jimmy: you can have that back an' all Jimmy: without having to force me Janis: you're only being generous 'cos I said it first Janis: don't lie Jimmy: nah Jimmy: I'm saying it 'cause it's true Janis: 'course it's true Janis: having to fake I'm even slightly like them puts it down 1000s of points Jimmy: there you go then Jimmy: take your 🏆 Janis: like you said, holding the brush the right way Jimmy: that ain't what I'm giving it to you for Janis: Yeah, my art ain't all that Jimmy: I dunno, you have your moments Janis: 😏 Jimmy: [IRL 😏 back] Janis: why do you reckon they do this Jimmy: got my 💰 and ⏲ on for human sacrifice Janis: roll on the witching hour Janis: 'cos this is dry Jimmy: What do you wanna do? Jimmy: I'll find a way to make it #goals Janis: [IRL 🤔] Jimmy: [at least we can pretend the 😍 at how cute she is are fake] Janis: being boring is catching or I've just got a one-track mind Janis: you can't be the only thing in this McMansion worth doing Jimmy: should've used that backhand to beat her at 🎾 Janis: I am livid I didn't Janis: but you know what I meant Jimmy: you're not in the 🗨 with Asia Jimmy: bored but not yet 🧠💀💀💀 Janis: you are? Jimmy: always Jimmy: but I meant even northern ain't that thick Janis: I can only imagine what she can find to talk about Jimmy: herself obvs, that's all I wanna hear about 💕 Janis: 🙄 Janis: my point exactly Janis: that's one 🗨 and out Jimmy: [lies all over her dramatically cos SO BORED] Janis: [huffs as dramatically like take the hint ladies] Janis: she still trying to get on you then or what Jimmy: ? Janis: Asia Janis: in your DMs Jimmy: she's still got a boyfriend, last I heard Janis: Obvs Janis: but if she's willing to break girlcode Jimmy: she wants to date someone #goals Jimmy: nowt to do with me Janis: Yeah Janis: still, gutted there's not more solid proof she's a shite friend and feminist Jimmy: could get it if you want me to though Janis: nah Janis: reckon they know it Janis: I wouldn't trust any of 'em anyway Jimmy: not 🧠💀💀💀 either, you Jimmy: Is Mia's daddy still here or what? Janis: not in my DMs Janis: you had an idea? Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: just bored enough to try and cause that breakdown Jimmy: [IRL thinking winnie] Janis: he'd clearly go for it Janis: fucking perv Jimmy: don't reckon lads are his type any more Jimmy: boarding school were a time and a place Janis: 💔 babe Janis: his distrust of teenage boys is well telling Jimmy: I know Jimmy: you got any ideas in that big head or what? Janis: plenty Jimmy: I get it, you want me to make you tell me them an' all Jimmy: Alright Janis: can't say it weren't fun Jimmy: [we out here doing the most again to not be bored, bonus that Mia is livid] Janis: [she gonna snap Janis: [maybe she should and they can be like well give us a tour then so can be nosy] Jimmy: [as a nosy bitch I love that] Janis: [she can show-off and be a general posh bitch] Jimmy: [Jimothy lowkey shooketh by her big posh house but not gonna give her the satisfaction of knowing] Janis: fuck the spare room Janis: taking the west wing, like Jimmy: not sure you'll have enough leg room Janis: Beats my current digs Jimmy: not in the middle of nowt for a start Janis: anywhere beats there, obvs Jimmy: might move myself in, see how long it takes her to notice I ain't paid staff Janis: literally stealing my ideas but fine Janis: big enough for us all Jimmy: you'd have to just hide Jimmy: can't get the rich girl off you Janis: shut up Jimmy: but then how will I make a massive echo calling you a dickhead? Janis: You'll manage Jimmy: [playful nudge to annoy both her and tour guide Mia] Janis: [gives him a dirty look and an apologetic one to Mia like ugh, sorry about him, really trying to focus here] Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Janis: don't act shocked Janis: how you think the rich stay rich Jimmy: I were gonna offer to give you a piggy back so you don't exhaust yourself going round this massive palace but you'd never make it over the rich v poor divide to get on Janis: divide you put up and maintain Janis: just financed it, like Jimmy: gotta keep it looking nice, girl Jimmy: bit of working class pride or some such bollocks Janis: beats this middle-class minimalism Janis: besides, your injuries aren't healed enough Jimmy: 🏆💪 me Jimmy: nowt to worry about Janis: [a look like yeah right] Jimmy: [a look back like you weren't worried earlier when we were doing all that saucy behaviour] Janis: [😳 and looking away] Jimmy: [walking ahead on this tour cos only so fake he can be before it's unbelievable and peeps know he's antisocial] Janis: you'll have to be back early for your sibs, yeah Jimmy: If you need an excuse not to have a cosy little breakfast with her and daddy, we can use that Janis: well yeah Janis: can't say I need to go to the gym if she has one Jimmy: watch her try and make us wait on her for our community service hours though Janis: she's so Janis: you know you go to the same shit school we all do, right Jimmy: bet her dad's 💔💔💔 Jimmy: could also fake that mine gives a shit where I am, there's another excuse banked Janis: not totally untrue the way your phone blows up sometimes Janis: no wonder her ma is depressed Jimmy: none of 'em need to know that's all my other girlfriends Jimmy: least if her mum shows up I can get back on track with causing that 😱😱😱 Janis: 'course Janis: her ma is her double so have fun with that Jimmy: 🤤🤤 Janis: don't make me 🤢 Jimmy: you'll have to swallow, food poisoning ain't gonna work a second time Janis: good thing I don't want you looking after me Janis: won't have to make such a scene, bound to be another bathroom soon Jimmy: won't thank you in my oscar speech then Jimmy: save it for my true fans Janis: you do that arsehole Jimmy: [comes back purely to talk to Asia like okay I shall] Janis: [is fuming] Jimmy: [I dread to think what she's saying to him but we know he can fake like he doesn't regret this instantly so] Janis: [just on your phone like there's something so interesting rn 'cos if you storm off they'll all notice] Jimmy: [is her boyfriend still there or nah cos I'm loling if he is] Janis: [assumedly, yeah, so you could talk to him for the pettiness of it all but we all know that wouldn't be fun so better to be going through your DMs like you're gonna respond Jimmy: [talk to some of the others as well boy, including Grace cos you know that'll annoy the bae] Janis: [😒 just coming up like 🚬 please and charging ahead to the garden/end of this tour] Jimmy: [you know he's gonna follow you gal even if it wasn't expected of him] Janis: [🚬 in silence like go away] Jimmy: [his turn to be on his phone while 🚬] Janis: [oh lads] Jimmy: [takes a pic of her 😒 face because he's a dickhead] Janis: ['delete that' when you're so moody lol] Jimmy: [does not] Janis: ['Oi' louder like he didn't hear] Jimmy: ['what?' boy you know] Janis: ['delete that picture now'] Jimmy: ['calm down, not gonna post it' still hasn't deleted it] Janis: ['that's not the point'] Jimmy: ['what is your point, Judith?' when you're just asking her why she's so mad like you don't know] Janis: ['I don't want you having photos of me on your phone' and coming over with your hand out like gimme] Jimmy: [does give it to her because 💔 by that] Janis: [deletes it like there, not so hard 'thank you' and handing it back] Jimmy: [just taking his phone back like this is super casual] Janis: [we're all fine and casual 'cept you so aren't and you're just here seething like hope the rest of you convinced Mia she weren't allowed to come out and 👀] Jimmy: [lighting another 🚬 as soon as you're done with the first one, nhs direct will be fuming at you as well sir] Janis: [never gonna heal at this rate lol] Jimmy: [honestly] Janis: [not the time to have that argument sadly] Jimmy: [fight fight fight] Janis: [More likely than admitting why you're actually pissed off but instead just laying down on some sun lounger bullshit and closing your eyes like lalalala] Jimmy: [that would be an artsy photo but we not gonna] Janis: [💔] Jimmy: [so awkward cos you know he's not leaving] Janis: [when you just laying there waiting but you can hear he ain't like what to do] Jimmy: [I like to imagine he's using this time wisely to deal with all the texts and shit he's been ignoring from Ian throughout the day and if there are any new ones from Cass cos not ignoring her ever] Janis: [be productive boy, we know you're ignoring all your fam all the time on the other hand so, finally sitting up like 'if you ain't gonna do this properly, we may as well just go now'] Jimmy: [comes to sit on the sun lounger the furthest away from the one she's on as a nice parallel to when he sat on the other end of the bench as far but as close as he could on school trip, but not yet looking up from his phone 'what are you on about?'] Janis: ['I mean, if you're going to jeopardize the plan by doing some ungoals shit I'm meant to then have an argument with you about, I can't be bothered, this is too much ballache as is, right'] Jimmy: [repeats what he just said but looking at her this time as if that will make her answer differently] Janis: [blinks at him like, really? 'what part of that did you not get?'] Jimmy: ['might be the part where you're not pulling your weight, fuck knows why I can't get my head round that though' sighs 'It were you stropping off and it were me who had to follow you to keep shit goals'] Janis: [a noise like um, what 'aside from the fact you walked off first, so you can't even have a go at me for it, I had to 'cos you were being a dick and what else could I do in response to that, nothing'] Jimmy: ['I walked off from the tour 'cause it's bollocks but I came back and now none of 'em could say I were being a dick' shrugs like the whole point is we play fake nice with them] Janis: ['yeah none of 'em can say that alright' 🙄 like don't be dense about it] Jimmy: [comes and sits on the end of the lounger she's on just looking at her 'what did you wanna do?' in reference to not being able to do anything else about him being a dick 'go on'] Janis: [looking back 'all I want is to not look like a twat in front of them, literally that's all' shrugs] Jimmy: ['Alright, you won't' draws a ✔ on her with his fingertip really softly and then looks back up at her 'promise'] Janis: [goes to say something multiple times but just nods 'cos safer] Jimmy: [just holding her hand and playing with it in a really soft way without thinking about it] Janis: [breathing out but in a calming down way not frustration] Jimmy: [a hug because that's something they do as mates nbd] Janis: ['this is such a headfuck' what part] Jimmy: ['I don't wanna do nowt that fucks you over' because way to say you care without actually doing it] Janis: ['we're on the same page then...' shakes head and then puts it in her hands like eurgh 'forget about it then?'] Jimmy: [does the thing where he goes to pat her on the head for bants but instead just strokes her hair cos he's the softest boy] Janis: [lying your head in his lap again 'just don't fuck Asia, yeah'] Jimmy: ['wouldn't if she paid us' has never meant anything he's said more than that lol] Janis: ['I'm glad to know the secret menu ain't just yous being pimped out, like'] Jimmy: ['me an' all'] Janis: [just snuggling on the low] Jimmy: [letting it happen] Janis: ['we could sleep out here' like probably not in your current attire but you're well used to sleeping outside otherwise] Jimmy: ['if you want' because he's done it too lbr and also we know he'll do anything she wants to] Janis: ['probably have to wait 'til they're asleep' sighs] Jimmy: ['no challenge that' these boring bitches are gonna go to sleep early obvs] Janis: ['even lizard boy will wear himself out after a go, like'] Jimmy: [a lol but a grossed out sound with it] Janis: [lols back 'as far as fake boyfriends go-' running her fingers up and down his arm '-thanks for not being scaly'] Jimmy: ['least I could do when you're so...' not gonna finish that sentence thank you] Janis: [looking up from his lap like ?] Jimmy: [just looking back at her like] Janis: [wrapping her arms around his neck to pull her face up and his down to meet it so she can kiss him] Jimmy: [letting this be a full make out moment even though you've been out here ages and the flat whites are gonna be gossiping cos idc] Janis: [none of us care, Asia you got no room to talk today lol] Jimmy: [likewise Mia you've been the WORST host so you can't say shit either] Janis: [obviously you will be but still, we do not care at all] Jimmy: [and we know most of them are team JJ at this point so deal with that babe] Janis: [lmao she will never] Jimmy: [Oh Mia] Janis: [truly what is this obsession, we will never know] Jimmy: [when even Grace is like dial it back and she's the OG of having an obsession with Janis so] Janis: [is she your twin sister who you miss and don't think loves you? no, I don't think so and we know you don't like any boy so even if you wanted to bang Jimmy you wouldn't need to be this weird about it] Jimmy: [mhmm wants to bang her own dad more like] Janis: [awkwardddd] Jimmy: [not the issue of why she can't but imagine what he'd look like please] Janis: [my boo like he ain't even hot haha] Jimmy: [tea though] Janis: [we all know it] Jimmy: [we should have her mum be there being cringe when they go back in so lowkey they haven't noticed how long JJ been gone even cos ugh] Janis: [dranking, flirting with Asia's man 'cos inappropriate parents yay] Jimmy: [a richer less trashy version of Carly's mum basically but her husband's doing the cheating instead of her] Janis: [that's the vibe, watch out Jimothy] Jimmy: [he walks in and wants to walk straight back out immediately so HAS TO pull the bae closer to him soz not soz] Janis: [protect ya mans from this sad middle-aged lady, like] Jimmy: [for real, sitting as far away from them all as you can without making it obvious meanwhile just pulling her into your lap like DON'T MOVE EVER THANK YOU] Janis: [getting to be real cutesy with it, said like you weren't snuggling outside lmao] Jimmy: [any excuse to be softer than you're pretending you like rn] Janis: [thanks for the excuse lads] Jimmy: [whispering shade about her weird mum so you don't have to think about not knowing where yours even is or if she's alive or nah] Janis: [just loling on the low like babe, you're so funny, 'cos obvs you've never met the bitch either and wow, what parents she has, she's gonna wanna die, oh Mia] Jimmy: [I'd feel bad for you but you're an evil bitch so I don't and what's more important is that Jimothy is clearly lowkey sad] Jimmy: [they wouldn't notice but we know Janis always notices things so] Janis: [squeezing his hand like you good?'] Jimmy: [just snuggling into her more because nobody's batting an eyelid at that] Janis: [kissing his forehead and murmuring something comforting about him still not feeling well 'cos fake sick earlier] Jimmy: [we're leaning into this narrative because nobody wants to be here] Janis: [nobody bitch, making a point of getting really cosy like we're gonna go to sleep now like Mrs Mia can you fuck off lol, putting a blanket over them and a pillow behind her head so he can stay sleeping on her] Jimmy: [the only time Mia and Janis have agreed on anything cos she really wants her mum to fuck off also] Janis: [just stroking his hair like he always do] Jimmy: [don't cry rn boy there's no styling it out] Janis: [just wait out these awkward last moments 'fore everyone goes to sleep lads] Jimmy: [everyone just faking they are asleep like let this end] Janis: [gonna take this opportunity tho] Janis: hey Jimmy: Alright? Janis: yeah Janis: you? Jimmy: Why wouldn't I be? Jimmy: best night EVER Janis: 😏 Janis: least we worked out why they're all such bitches Janis: this is their idea of fun Jimmy: least it weren't all shit Janis: the food was pretty good, yeah Jimmy: meant to be me who's the fat fuck Jimmy: don't be coming for my 👑 tah Janis: I'll let you keep it Janis: no 🐸 Jimmy: can't fight you for it, too unfit, me Janis: shut up Janis: you're well fit, babes Jimmy: 💕 Janis: 😍 Jimmy: 😘 Janis: 💖 Jimmy: [draws a heart with their initials in on whatever bit of her skin he can reach rn] Janis: [stops breathing for a hot sec] Jimmy: [keeping that hand wherever it landed so casually] Janis: Jimmy Jimmy: ? Janis: what do you wanna do when we get out of here ⛓ Jimmy: What do you wanna do? Janis: Something actually fun Janis: I dunno what yet, I'll be thinking Jimmy: Alright Janis: is Tammy asleep already or does she need an Oscar? Jimmy: [throws something at her that can't be traced back to him because he's so asleep and so ill bye] Janis: [he'd feel the lols she's holding in so hard rn] Jimmy: [tickles her a little bit but like too lightly to actually make her lol] Janis: [just squirming away so hardcore I hope no one else is that close to yous two] Jimmy: [pulling her back to you even closer than she was before if that's possible] Janis: [when you wanna makeout so bad but you also feel so soft so you're like no we can't but also why not ahh] Jimmy: [we know it's gonna happen lads] Janis: [try to be quiet there are so many peeps in this room with you not asleep yet] Jimmy: [there's your excuse to be softer with it cos a bit quieter well it would be if you weren't so into it] Janis: [just clenching your fists 'til your fingernails cut into your palms tryna be quiet over here when you're fully dying] Jimmy: [at least he'd obviously be dying as much imagine if one of you was really into it and the other person was like meh] Janis: [you both love it that's why there's no denying that, if there ever was tbh] Jimmy: [mhmm] Janis: [consider not going all the way here though tah lizard boy is 1000% listening and he doesn't deserve the show] Jimmy: [I know you really wanna lads but I really don't wanna give him those mental images or sound effects] Janis: [though he should totally spread it around that you did 'cos just real] Jimmy: [he's so that dickhead] Janis: [playing into Mia's hands, someone has to this sleepover has been a total fail for you babe] Jimmy: [suddenly don't hate him as much do you hun] Janis: [new bff lol] Jimmy: [you two should totally sneak off though cos nobody can stop you if they fake sleeping] Janis: [you simply must] Jimmy: [Mia's room blatantly] Janis: [fuck on her bed and go through her things, literally the least she deserves] Jimmy: [making what would already be a 🔥 hook up even better] Janis: [least you can make some noise, her rents room is probably a million miles away 'cos posh people] Jimmy: [love that for you two] Janis: [mood and a moment, shame you can't sleep in there] Jimmy: [well they could as long as they get up before Mia does which realistic cos a bitch is on death's door] Janis: [lmao, it's just a weird fuck you flex that I'm about] Jimmy: [same though] Janis: [taking a selfie so smug] Jimmy: [yaaas] Janis: [we'll pretend it's just for blackmail purposes later and not 'cos he looks that good but there's no denying your 😍] Jimmy: [we know they love an excuse for a photoshoot and the 😍 are mutual af] Janis: [honestly just staring at him appreciating for a hot sec] Jimmy: [looking at her like ? boy you know] Janis: ['it's rude'] Jimmy: ['what?'] Janis: [points at him like 'you'] Jimmy: [shakes his head and points at her instead trying not to blush] Janis: ['you're so' not purposely copying him from earlier but here we are] Jimmy: [gotta kiss her so you don't say something that we can't take back] Janis: [relatable] Jimmy: [I'm like how else can you fuck with Mia while you've basically got free run of her gaff rn lol] Janis: [there's got to be shit, like as long as you keep it quiet, you could do anything, within reason] Jimmy: [ninja-ing through the place] Janis: [also what can you do that she won't be able to say shit about/immediately know/assume it's you two hmm] Jimmy: [gotta be sneaky but yeah idk] Janis: [I wonder, maybe there's some cringe photos of her from childhood they could find? Jimmy: [love that and OMG maybe this is too far/ not feasible if her dad is like sleeping in his study wherever but I just thought what if they found something cringe about him/ his latest affair etc] Janis: [my mind was also there like no doubt his phone has a passcode but what if his laptop or something is open with an account logged in, I wasn't sure] Jimmy: [I say fuck it why not he's probably not that smart/ not expecting the sneak attack/ drunk] Janis: [let's do it honey, yo to the lo] Jimmy: [they're only gonna use it if she deserves it like when she gets him fired or something so it's her own fault] Janis: [mhmm, we know she has it coming so save it up honey] Jimmy: [that's her sorted then is there anything else we wanna have happen/ be said between them?] Janis: [1000% signing up for the dating apps and shit to find him...CATFISH HER DAD lmao we probably just need to decide how we're having them leave in the AM and then that should be good though] Jimmy: [obvs they gotta leave early so probably assume they can sneak off but I think they should all be up working out because Mia's that control freak who makes the squad except like Asia and her bf who refuse to get up lol] Janis: [what a disturbing scene like soz we gotta go rn immediately still] Jimmy: [Jimmy like I'm not dressed for your zumba fitness and also I'm not a wine mum so bye] Janis: [just get to be vaguely passive-aggressive about doing a real workout like buhbye] Jimmy: [love that for you both, Jimmy like I've got a puppy to walk because I don't kill and eat small living creatures 🐍] Janis: [so glad to be out of there alive tbh] Jimmy: [I dread to think what kind of weird intense workout Mia would actually do, oh girl] Janis: [the others just dying like how is she not] Jimmy: [fuelled purely by the mems of what a shit night she had] Janis: [and what 🔥 hookups they had all over your gaff] Jimmy: [meanwhile Jimothy'll be getting through community service because of how good she looks in yet more of his borrowed clothes] Janis: [you need to sneak home for provisions soon babe but not this morning] Jimmy: [#never soz cali] Janis: [you can be home if you want the row or nah, we know the vibe for always] Jimmy: [Twix will never let you leave gal she'll be buzzing to see you] Janis: [like where have you been bestie lmao] Jimmy: [real loves of each other's lives] Janis: [at least community service today won't be as shit now] Jimmy: [thank god, it's hilarious that this convo started how it did] Janis: [shamelessly making up for the lost time like it's going out of style] Jimmy: [living for how highkey you two are always] Janis: [aren't we all, especially you two, random thought but do we wanna have anyone else stand out/be of note in community service?] Jimmy: [oooh that's a good idea boo] Janis: [it has potential if we wanna use it] Jimmy: [agreed, we'll have to ponder, have you got anyone she always takes pics with or anything that you're like when the fuck am I gonna use you?] Janis: [aside from the boys from the Netflix show, not really] Jimmy: [they probably don't look like they're community service lads sadly] Janis: [lmao probably not though this is prime jealousy time for you all] Jimmy: [we should totally exploit that if nothing else because Asia is no actual threat but a community service girl that she thinks is his type, like hello and we know he gets jealous if she literally interacts with anyone rn so] Janis: [why not I say] Jimmy: [all the content we can get from the headfuck this time period is, we gotta] Janis: [right, they're just jealous is the point, there literally doesn't have to be anything in it] Jimmy: [we 👀 you] Janis: [do you wanna skip to a bit of that, or something else, end this here???] Jimmy: [we should probably end this here even if we wanna do some of that because a bit rude to ruin day 2 of community service as well as day 1 lol like give them a good one first at least] Janis: [yeah it doesn't have to be immediate okay leggo]

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