#why cant i just find normal irl ppl to befriend like why's that so hard honestly
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#sometimes it just hits me how lonely i am#like I'd be dramatic in saying that nobody cares abt me its not tru but also it lowkey is#i just need some good friends like its too much atp#my bestf like? i was going thru sm two days ago and she didnt even check up on me after that day once? like nothing??? zero text calls?#i have never done that to her but sometimes i start feeling like a pushover to others for caring and checking up on them#then when i stop doing it its alwasy others who are saying 'you dont talk to us anymore' bitch i WAS#its just always always like this rinse and repeat rinse and repeat.#why cant i just find normal irl ppl to befriend like why's that so hard honestly#into the void#sorry for the rant ahem its just een on my mind how i was so stressed abt smth 2 days ago and since then she hasnt at all talked to me?#when she was in my situation i was talking to her almost regularly to check?#god am i really the one who's expecting a lot#okay this got long uhm#yeah I'm just fucking lonely i guess#and being at home 24 7 w nothing to do is actually making it worse i think#i need to start being productive
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